Hii. I know it's been only a few days since I posted the last one, but my college break will be over this week and I'm trying to make the best out of it, sooo.

I hope you like it!

Chapter 12: Slipping underneath

ELENA POV

My back was leaned comfortably against the headboard of the bed, legs wrapped in the white and purple blankets, one of the many Damon bought for me when he redecorated my bedroom, a book resting in my hands. It wasn't the beautiful hardcover edition of Pride and Prejudice or any of Stephen King's for that matter, this time it was a collection of essays about the portraition of emotions in children's animations. Damon gave it to me a few weeks ago, and since Shane loved the article I wrote about it, I decided to re-read some bits and select the ones that would be useful to my thesis.

The main goal of my research is to understand better how the environment the child lives in can affect the recovery of a traumatic experience. Jeremy and I were very lucky to have a healthy, loving home that provided us a comforting and safe place to heal; and even so I closed myself for years and he lost himself to his drug addiction.

Many others, like Adam, are less fortunate. Not only did he lose both of his parents, going through the pain of witnessing his own father murder his mother and commit suicide right after, he's also very young and ended up alone, under the care of strangers as none of his living relatives wanted to take him to raise. And, with the topic I was studying as I worked hard to get my specialization as a Pediatrician, it was almost impossible not to think about Adam when he so sadly fit in all of these patterns.

Fortunately, I didn't have the time to duel on it because the person who helped me go through my own personal hell, after the crash that killed my parents, was now walking towards me with a Ben & Jerry in her hands.

Dear reader, meet the one and only, Jenna Sommers.

Jenna actually meant to surprise me at my old apartment when she arrived in New York this afternoon. Partly as an apology for not being able to attend Jeremy's farewell party, partly to check on how I was doing after the departure of said nephew. But, of course, because I forgot to mention that I had moved, she called me totally freaked out, screaming in my ears.

— Where the hell are you, Elena? — She demanded to know as soon as I picked up the call, without even bothering to say "hi". — Because, apparently, you're not at home. When the manager said to me that lovely Elena wasn't living here anymore, I always threw the Ben & Jerry I had bought for us at his face. "Mr. Tanner, my lovely niece wouldn't change her address without telling me about it!" I told him. But you clearly did, so where are you, Elena? Because as far as I know you might not even be in New York anymore. You could be in Paris, taking selfies at the Eiffel Tower with Jeremy for heaven's sake!

If you think her call was the last of her scolding speech, you would've guessed right. Thankfully, when Jenna did end it, she actually seemed much more accepting of the fact I was sharing a place with Damon than any of my friends were.

I was debating whether or not I should tell her about me falling in love with him, when a loud sound caused me to jump in bed. My eyes immediately began to search for what had captured my hearing so abruptly. Following the noise, I looked up at the window only to see the first drops of rain falling.

Sensing my sudden anxiety, Jenna reached for my hand between the covers, squeezing comfortingly; and because of it, the lump in my throat didn't suffocate me as much as it would have if I was here all by myself. It was raining on the day my family's car drove off the bridge, therefore, sometimes when it rains, I'm taken back to that night by the unwelcomed panic attacks.

It's one of the reasons why I couldn't live alone in the first place. Sure, it's not always so bad, after all it's been years, and ever since I've also managed to go through a lot of rainy days without feeling my heart tightening, I even made an amazing memory that involved the rain with Damon on the day we danced on our rooftop… But when my brain decides to be my enemy, I lose it; and it usually happens when I'm alone and inside the house. Damon's theory is that I feel trapped between the walls of a home, which strangely reminds me of the feeling of being trapped in a car that was drowning.

Whatever the reasons may be, I'm just immensely glad to have Jenna here from all days, holding my hand and supporting me as she did thousands of times in the past.

The tapping of raindrops eventually became a rustling sound as the rain started to come down in earnest. It was one of those fresh storms that wouldn't probably last very long, but logic is not always enough to stop the crisis of a troubled soul.

And as if there was an actual thin red thread of fate connecting us, I heard his voice coming from the hallway. — Elena? — He called me; and I looked shyly at Jenna because the panic in his voice was obvious.

A few more steps through the corridor that leads to the bedrooms and his pleas became even clearer. — I swear I tried to come as soon as this Autumn storm was announced on the news… — His voice was getting closer and closer. — But the Grill was too crowded and the streets were too trafficked… — Then his same voice faded as he opened the door.

A wide-eyed Damon Salvatore was staring at us, shifting his gaze between my aunt and me. His black-raven hair was a bit too wet, enough for me to know he came from the part of the city that was already raining too. He opened his mouth to speak, and I noticed the flush on his cheeks. It was adorable, honestly.

I also saw Jenna raising an eyebrow at him; and I wanted to scold my aunt for making the most confident man I know look like a kid who was caught with his hands in the cookie's jar. I couldn't help the smile that popped up in the corner of my lips, though, as I wondered about how he would have reacted if she had been the one at the door on the day I moved in, not Stefan nor his mother.

— Oh. Jenna. Hm, I… I didn't mean to… — Damon shook his head, trying to sound as casual as possible and failing cutely. — I didn't know you were coming to visit.

I gave him an apologetic smile, but it was my aunt who answered. — I wanted to surprise my niece. I hope it's ok.

— Yeah. Yeah, it's fine. — Damon cleared his throat, his hands running through his hair as I recognized one of his nervous habits. — I came running because of the rain. — He explained himself, glancing at me for a second before meeting my aunt's amused gaze. — But… It's- It's all good. So, I'm just gonna… — He swallowed, pointing at the door he had just come in, slowly making his way out of the room. Not before adding politely and sincerely. — It's great having you here, Jenna. I'm sure Elena loved the surprise.

Jenna was murmuring something that I didn't have the time to listen to because I was soon running out of the bed to meet him in the corridor. — Damon, wait! — I called; and once I was out of the door too, he turned around to look at me.

He smiled more easily now. — It's okay. — He said. — Go back to your aunt, Elena. I know how you both missed each other. I didn't mean to interrupt… — And doing my own interruption of the night, I shut him up by hugging him tightly.

Damon instantly relaxed beneath my touch, which warmed me instantly too. Ever since I came to terms with my feelings for him, there's this sort of ache that comes with being near him, and I love it. — I'm sorry. — He whispered, sounding just as painful; and part of me couldn't ignore the fact that it might mean more to him as well. — It started to rain and… I got worried.

— Don't apologize. — I said softly, looking up to gaze at his piercing blue irises. — You're adorable for looking after me. — A half-smile rose in his lips as I drifted apart, still not being able to take my hands off his arms. — And I really didn't know Jenna was coming.

Damon nodded. — It's fine. You know she's welcome to stay as long as she wants.

— I do. — I sighed, thinking about the gift Damon gave me a few days ago, one that made me jump in his arms in happiness. — It's just a pity that we will be leaving for Paris by the weekend.

He shrugged. — Well, how long does she plan on staying? If that's the case I can always book her a ticket, too.

— Really? — I asked, genuinely surprised; although I should have guessed, he is that thoughtful.

— Really.— He said, smiling back at me. — I know Jeremy will be happy to see her. Plus, if she's there I won't need to carry your shopping bags.

— Yeah, 'cause you will be carrying both of our bags. — I corrected him, widening my smile.

He shook his head and smirked. — Nope, it won't happen. I will be teaching Little Gilbert to flirt with the French ladies.

I rolled my eyes. — I told him you wouldn't lose the chance to use your charm in Paris. How many cheesy pick-up lines there are about being in the City of Love?

— I don't know. You can count, though, since I'm planning on using them all on you. — He flirted playfully. I will never get used to his blunt display of affection; and it doesn't seem so playful now that I know there's something between us. And I couldn't stop my heart from beating faster either. — But, really, tell me, — His thumb and index held the tip of my chin kindly. — Are you ok? With the rain and all.

God, he's so painfully close and I want to kiss him so desperately.

Instead, I smiled. — Yeah, I'm ok.

— Good. — He stared at my lips before pulling back; the husky voice of his next words only confirmed the longing I saw in his eyes. — I'm taking a quick shower. I didn't get soaked or anything, but… — His hands instinctively went to ruffle his wet hair. — I want to use that strawberry shampoo again.

I winked timidly. — It's fair since I'm using your new bathtub all the time.

— Lainey. — There was a light waning in his tone; then he sucked dry, deciding not to say whatever just crossed his mind, though I do have some idea of what could be. — Maybe I can cook you guys dinner after the shower?

Gratefully, I'm a bit more composed than he seems to be. At this moment, at least.

— I will check with her. But, actually, — I looked at him through my eyelashes. — Me and Jenna were just going to have a girl's night. You know, paint our nails and let something play on Netflix like the old times, and maybe eat those tacos you left for me.

A glimpse of disappointment crossed his face, and it went away almost fast enough for me to miss it, but I didn't. — Yeah. Have a nice evening you two. I do have some stuff from the clinic to catch up with anyway. It's a good thing I got home earlier.

I laughed. — You know it's not a girl's night for me if you're not in it, right?

— Did I say I needed to catch up with something? — He rephrased himself at the speed of light. — Weird. I actually meant I was hoping to rest and do it another time.

Is it possible for me to fall for him even harder? Surely that's not what I said. — How are things going at the clinic, by the way?

Damon smiled knowingly. — You mean, how are things going with Adam?

— Yes. — I admitted. — So, how's my boy?

He smirked. — I'm great, Elena, thanks for asking.

— How is Adam? — I corrected him with a pointed look.

I thought about the kid in question and a smile emerged spontaneously. The truth is that I haven't seen Adam ever since that day we watched Disney movies on the Grill's rooftop. But Damon always tells me he's constantly asking about "Elena, the pretty doctor," and, I don't know, I just… grew fond of him.

Damon catched on the change and smiled. — You really like him, don't you?

— Of course. I've always loved kids. Besides, it's hard not to melt when he looks at us with those shining gray eyes.

— Fair enough. — He agreed, seeming a bit deep in thought for a brief moment. — He's doing ok. I'm a little worried because… See, we are close to reaching that time of therapy when the crisis will increase before it all starts to get better. It's a necessary part of the treatment, to which he's responding really well so far. It's just… To be honest, I just feel kind of terrible about him having to face it all alone.

I took his hands in mine. — He's not alone, Damon. He has you.

— I know, it's just… I don't know. I'm a bit invested in the kid. — He smiled, looking sad even; but he still shrugged noncommittally. — I guess I like him, too.

And an idea lit in my head.

It would be a little awkward with Jenna, for some reason. But what matters the most is Adam. I know he will be more comfortable around us, especially when the crisis reaches its peak; and it will calm Damon too, to know he will be able to help his favorite patient like truly wants to.

— If you are allowed to… — I began, shaking both of our joined hands in the air, while Damon tried to suppress a smile. — You can bring him here to hang out if you're somewhat sensing it will be a difficult day for him.

He frowned. — Would you be ok with it?

— Yes. I know he's your patient and all. But, like I said, I do happen to love kids. And I happen to like him a lot, so yeah, of course. — I giggled. — Plus, I'm already practicing babysitting all this time with you, it will be nice to try on an actual child this time so I can train for when I get my own little Gilberts.

Damon kittened his eyes. — You mean, besides Jeremy?

— Hahaha. — I said with mockery, my real laugh betraying my fakeness.

And it was when we both heard Jenna's voice shouting from my bedroom. — Damon, I hope you didn't steal my niece from me! I just got in here!

Damon and I looked at each other, that same known spark brightening our eyes, and we both knew we were about to lose it even before burst into laughter.

I let go of his hand just to lean my forehead against his chest and I felt the tears of joy raining on my eyes. Even after five years of friendship, I'm still immensely glad that he decided it was worth digging into my shell because I have been laughing like this ever since. And, well, if we do find anything else, it will just be the cherry on the top of a paradise cake.

He gently pulled me back, shrugging with a guilty expression. — I've been accused of stealing you just to me from pretty much everyone in your life by now. — He pointed out, making me laugh a bit more — I guess I won't take the risk with Jenna. I don't plan on using my brother's law skills to take me out of jail and free me from her kidnapping charges.

— Jenna would indeed press charges. — I agreed.

— She would.

My eyes found his again, and I don't know what's gotten into me, because all the things I said after our long-gazing revealed much more than I had ever intended to. — Just so you know, I'm ok with it. — He squinted his eyes in confusion, so I elaborated. — You can steal me anytime you want.

If I ever got worried about showing too much of my feelings, these concerns disappeared the second he smiled at me — that boyish smile that Kol, Stefan, and even Matt had, but like everything else, it's only when it's his toothy grin been flashed at me that I feel the butterflies in my stomach.

His young-happily features seemed to give me the courage I needed to say more.

— And… Well, I know we have this whole… couple-ish thing going on. — I looked down, feeling my cheeks burning. — Platonically, I mean. But, hm, you don't have to… — I risked meeting his eyes only to come face to face with a wide grin that just made me blush harder. Surprisingly, my voice came out quite steady after I was captured by his silver-blue eyes. — You don't have to be shy around me because Jenna's here or anything. Do you know that, right?

And I should've known, I should've known he wouldn't miss it because the only thing he apparently heard and commented on was the term I chose to describe us. — A couple-ish thing going on?

— Oh, shut up. — I smacked his arm playfully, not that successfully getting past my own sudden shyness. — You know what I mean.

His eyes burned when he spoke, every bit of amusement left, nowhere to be found. There was only pure and unconditional love with a certain that made me weak on the knees. — Yeah, I do know.

— Elena! — Jenna called me again, once more making us laugh, a lot softer this time though.

— I'm coming! — I shouted back, without taking my eyes off him. — So, I will just… — I turned to walk back to my room, stumbling on my own feet.

Damon laughed. — Just one thing. — He held my wrist, also looking down for a moment, but when he did glance back at me he was more confident than I would ever be capable of, especially now that everything is coming to the surface in strong, deep waves. — You don't have to be shy around me either. Not when your aunt is around, but, especially, when she's not.

Is he…?

Is it possible that he somehow figured out that it flows both ways?

Am I being this obvious?

— Damon, I… — I started, not having the slightest idea of what I was about to say, when Jenna timely cut me off.

This time, she looked at us with a head popping through the door of my bedroom, and seeing she was not interrupting anything, or so she decided, I'm sure Damon would've thought otherwise, she came out to the hallway, her hands crossed in front of her chest as she murdered both of us with her eyes.

— It's not possible that you two have this much to talk about.

With a regained confidence, Damon looked over my shoulder to Jenna and smirked. – We spent the whole day apart!

And now I was the one sending him a murderous look. You're certainly doing a great job of not making me act shy around you, I told him silently, and I could tell by his soft low laugh that he read the words in my eyes.

Thankfully, Jenna didn't seem to read too much into it. In fact, she just rolled her eyes and came to take me by the hand, walking me back to my bedroom. — Change of plans. Netflix is canceled, we're just going to listen to old ballads and gossip.

— Ok. — I asked myself if this had anything to do with her sensing the love-tension that floated in the air whenever me and Damon were around each other and if that was what she wanted to gossip about.

— Hey, Jenna. — Damon called her. Not making the minimum effort to hide her annoyed sigh, she turned around to face him. — Do you want me to cook something for dinner?

Her face lit up right away. Yeap, that's the effect of my best friends' cooking skills. But she wouldn't be a family member of mine if she didn't play hard to catch. — Elena said there were tacos.

— Yeah, but you will need to warm them up in the microwave. — He shrugged, knowing damn well she wouldn't be able to say no. — So, what do you say?

My aunt tried to act indifferent, but way too quickly and there she was, asking for her favorite dinner option. — Those Primavera Stuffed Chickens?

Damon smiled. — I will wash the rain off my body and put the invisible apron on. What are we going to gossip about?

— Who says you're invited? — Jenna fired back. I squeezed her arm and she sighed, wearing a smug smile that said she was up to no good. — You will know if you let us paint your nails.

He groaned, looking at me pleading. — Really?

— Don't think she will fall for you and your baby blue eyes! — Jenna pointed her index at him, and her voice was visibly softer when it was directed to me. — I know you will love to. I bought a stunning pink nail polish.

It wasn't exactly pink, if anything it looked more guava on Damon's fingernails as I, later, held his middle finger and brushed the polish on it. — You need to stay still, or I will just mess everything up!

Damon sighed, doing as I said. — I can't believe you're making me do this. I'm going to see Adam tomorrow, do you know that? He's going to make fun of me!

— Adam, huh? — Jenna teased. — You're hooking up with boys now?

He eyed her. — No. I did hook up with boys in the past, but since Enzo and Bonnie refused to let me in on their relationship, I had to forget all about my threesome fantasies.

— Who could blame them for it? — Jenna answered. — Although I would have considered it if your friend Alaric was one of the guys involved in it.

Damon raised an eyebrow. — Do you have a thing for Ric?

— He's hot. — She admitted.

He considered for a moment, giving me the next finger in line for me to paint. — I'm an excellent matchmaker, so I can bring him up while you're here. — Jenna nodded eagerly, and he chuckled. — I hope Jeremy chooses his companions better.

Jenna laughed. — It depends on what you consider better. I like Kol.

I let the guava-pink slide all the way through Damon's finger, but he didn't care at all; both of us were staring at her with a questioning look. Did she just imply that Kol and my brother are a thing? What? What is this story anyway? A "how to shock Elena with the unpredictable couples that ended up getting together" comedy?

She flew the icecream to her mouth — Damon's homemade one because even Jenna needed to admit it tasted way better than Ben & Jerry's, no matter how famous the brand may be.

— What? — She asked, dropping the spoon in her bowl. — Didn't you guys know they have on-going fling?

I opened my mouth astonished. — I- I had no idea. — Damon seemed to be just as clueless, but I asked him to be sure. — Did you know about it?

He shook his head. — Nope.

— Yeah. — Jenna smiled. — They're cute. Although it didn't go beyond the fling-thing because Jeremy was going to study in Paris; but they hung out all the time before he left. I mean, whenever I called to check on him, it was always Kol this, Kol that. And he went to help him with the change, didn't he?

Letting go of the nail polish, I covered my mouth in shock with my cleaned hands. I had sort of promised Damon that he would be allowed to paint mine since I insisted on doing his. — Oh, my god!

— Wow. — Damon sighed in defeat. — Little Gilbert needs some tips, lots of them, it seems his taste in men is just as bad as yours. — He said to Jenna who threatened to throw the pink liquid on his face.

It was three a.m when we finished our slumber party. Jenna fell asleep by the edge of my king-size bed, while Damon and I were sitting close to each other between the pillows that had been put against the headboard.

In the end, he did a remarkably good job with painting my nails; he used a purple tone knowing it happened to be my favorite color. The pink one looked great on him, almost as good as the eyeliner I had made him wear. It made him even hotter and it reminded me of the days he used to put on makeup to match costumes with me, back in our college parties days.

— You're getting sleepy, aren't you? — He whispered, doing his best not to wake my aunt after the red wine had hit her.

I smiled. — A little bit. Can I sleep with you tonight? It will be hard to find a comfortable position with aunt Jenna here, she moves too much.

— Sure. — He gestured towards the door. — My bed is bigger anyway; and for as soft as your blankets might be, I have Egyptian sheets.

— I bet you didn't get one of those for me just so I would have to go to yours if I wanted to.

He laughed. — Maybe. But… Do I need an excuse to share a bed with you, Elena?

I swallowed, fixing my eyes on his lips. — You never did.

I felt his hand slip through mine. And, as I shifted my gaze to his thumb brushing the back of it, I started to question if I should have even asked to sleep at his. It was going to be too difficult not to jump on his bones in his dark room, behind closed doors.

Damon usually sleeps shirtless wearing only his boxes, and I was half-expecting him to take it off just to see how bad I was actually craving him — because I know he must have noticed. But God does have mercy on me because he kept his shirt on, even going for pajama pants instead of his usual stay-in shorts.

I climbed on bed next to him, relaxing on his Egyptian sheets that truly were as soft as clouds. Unlike most nights, though, I kept my distance, a real visible distance, and of course he was having too much fun with it to stop himself from teasing me about it.

— Babe, if you keep sliding your butt to the edge of the bed like that you're going to fall. — He said pointedly, putting his hands behind his head and my mouth watered at the sight of his muscles flexing.

Babe.

He never, ever, called me that before.

Still keeping some distance between us, I slid a bit closer to him. Damon observed me with a smile, until he rolled his eyes and decided to do something about it. His hands went to my legs and he pulled me to him with only a mere inch separating us.

Can't look at his lips, can't look at his eyes.

I sighed, hiding my face on his chest and allowing him to hug me tight. The only problem was that he started to ghost his fingers at the skin of my arm, just the tip of it, very torturously slow. He rested his cheeks on the top of my head, fixing the strands so it wouldn't fall on my face, and hummed quietly. — You know, that's the third time this week you're sleeping here.

Oh, so he did notice. Not that I believed otherwise, of course he would have noticed the change. I just didn't think he would say anything about it.

Damon and I have been sleeping on the same bed almost every night, sometimes in his bedroom, sometimes in mine. It's nothing planned or anything, it just sort of… happens. If I get home earlier, then he comes to my room to check on me once he's finished at the Grill, and before I know it, I'm waking up cuddled in his arms. It goes the same way when he gets home first and I go to say hi.

I should be worrying about Jenna catching us, because I know she will connect the dots and figure out I slept in here once she wakes up next morning. But, despite me not wanting anyone getting nosy in my relationship with Damon, not before we find a way to deal with this mutual longing we have been sharing, I sleep so much better with him besides me to care. Or to even begin to consider tracing a line, I'm all about erasing them at this point.

I looked up at him. — And you slept in mine on all the other days of the week. — I shrugged as if it was no big deal, even if both of us knew better.

I also knew his mind was probably going crazy at this point, so I decided to break another unspoken rule of our friendship. What's one more, when we are already lying together in bed, right?

— Don't overthink too much. — I told him softly. — Honestly, it's all because of your Egyptian sheets.

He chuckled beneath me. — They are pretty comfortable, aren't they?

— Hm-hm. — I mumbled, closing my eyes and breathing his mint aftershave. How unfair is it that everything about him feels this good?

— Klaus was at the Grill today. — He said, suddenly changing the subject and bringing me back to reality.

— Please tell me you didn't kill him. — I said, only half joking.

He laughed. — Nah, just a punch.

— Damon!

But when I looked into his eyes, he was smiling. — You idiot. — So I punched his chest lightly before lying on it once more. I sighed, trying to think of the best way to approach the situation. It was a very delicate matter, I knew that. — He's not a bad person, you know. And neither is Caroline.

They made the mistake of sleeping together. But no matter how bad it might be, it just proves that they are both human. We all screw up sometimes. Besides, Stefan broke things with her the second she told him what happened. If losing the possible love of your life it's not punishment enough, then I don't know what else could be.

— He got wasted because Blondie is dogging him. — Damon puffed, deflecting a little bit from my empathetic statement. — And I had to sit there, praying for the bourbon to calm me down, or help me God I would have punched him for making me listen to his drunk love confessions about my brother's ex-girlfriend.

His judgment was crystal clear. Deep down, I know it's more in sympathy for Stefan than an actual anger towards Klaus and Caroline.

Plus, I might not be as close to Klaus as Damon is, but I'm a really good judge of character and I know he's a nice guy. A man who spends his time buying dresses for his brother's dates can't be that bad. And if I learned anything about analyzing people after all these years of friendship with Damon, then I would guess that Klaus just wears that "I'm awesome" facade because his inner demons are telling the exact opposite, he's only covering his traumas.

Damon let out a deep breath. — But I know they are not. Blondie is a pain in the ass, though she's alright. And I've been friends with Klaus ever since we were kids. The guy is a douche most of the time, but he always had my back when I needed it. It's just… — His voice cracked a little bit with the next words and all my suspicions about his brotherhood compassion were proven right. — It's my brother, Lainey.

— I know. — I sighed, too; and I do know. For as long as I can remember I have worried, loved and protected Jeremy just as fiercely as Damon does it with Stefan. Still, I needed to lighten the mood for my nakama. — I mean, if Kol ends up breaking Jeremy's heart, I will make him regret the day he became my friend.

I felt Damon's body shaking again, his laugh being slightly muffled by the locks of my hair. Mission "take his mind off his brother's dramas" accomplished!

— How's that knowledge sulking, by the way? — He asked.

— Badly. — I answered sincerely and his shaking only increased.

It shocked me, I have to admit. I always knew that Kol and Jeremy were friends, but I just assumed my baby brother was off-limits for any of my drinking buddies. However, if there's a frat boy I would trust my brother with, it's certainly the one that goes by the nickname of Peter Pan.

If he ended up with one of his junkie friends, then I would be worried. When we first moved to New York, he dated a girl named Vicky who had an overdose and almost took my brother with her because his grief involved a whole lot of drugs and self harming cuts.

Kol may get him drunk and make him act a bit reckless, but he's harmless. Besides, I was the girl who smoked vervain on a hookah, so it's not like I can judge his youth. Granted, my buzz didn't get in the way of college, but Kol is actually pretty responsible and can teach my brother on how to have fun without losing it.

— Lainey. — Damon called me softly once he noticed I was overthinking. And, of course, he knew exactly what was bugging me. — Neverland is the safest place for Little Gilbert to play, don't worry.

I laughed, that low and soft laugh only Damon gets to listen to because it has always been his. — I'm not worried, I'm just… Thinking.

— About the ways of murdering an Original? — He teased. And I wouldn't be surprised if that was how he spent his entire meeting with Klaus at the Grill, thinking about all the ways of poisoning the food and drink he was serving.

— About the ways love it's inevitable. — I replied, unintentionally erasing more lines I judged myself to be ready for.

Damon got quiet.

If it was any other night, I would have tricked myself into thinking his body didn't go rigid when I said those words, but it did, and I knew my unintentional admission was the reason for it. Like realizing how it instantly affected him also made my breath get stuck in my throat, as if my feelings were fighting to get out and urging me to keep them hidden.

Almost immediately, I feel the need to run. All my earlier thoughts about not wanting to sleep without him vanished, because, right now, in this precise moment, I couldn't be near him like this, not without walking to the other side of that forbidden bridge. And I don't really know if we are ready for that. Would I drown if I chose such a path now? Would we drown?

Letting go of his embrace, I lifted myself to sit on the bed. Damon was looking somewhere else, deep in thought, and it took him a moment to feel the absence of my body pressed against him and his sheets. But when his eyes found mine, I looked away in an automatic reaction. I was so, so scared.

— I- I think I'm going back to my bed. — I said, hating how my voice was coming out so ridiculously weak. — I can just make some space for myself… Or wake Jenna and ask her to—

— Elena. — He stopped me, sitting too, holding my wrist in between his hands and pulling himself closer to me; consequently wrapping his legs around my waist as he did. He caressed my back soothingly. — Hey, it's ok. — I dared to look at him and he was smiling so beautifully I had to fight so hard to not give in… Or to stop myself from dislodging myself from him and running to the hills. — Elena, we don't have to talk about it if you don't want to.

I ignored the part of me that told me that we kind of were already talking; and I laughed. I'm being a lot more transparent than I thought, and I say this taking in consideration that my fears were already very high. — How do you know me so well?

Damon shrugged. — I just do. — He placed a strand of hair behind my ear and I closed my eyes in delight with his gentleness. — I've always known you, babe. Even when I barely knew myself.

I opened my eyes, and there was this huge grin on his face like he had just won the lottery. Which doesn't make any sense because I'm practically admitting how I'm completely terrified to cross that one line I know he wants me to. But… I guess that just the fact I'm silently letting him know all the things I can't say yet, letting him know that there is something… I think it's enough for tonight.

— And I'm not verbalizing either. — My eyes widened in shock, and he chuckled. With a teasing wink, he added. — I have a major in Psychology, honey.

I rolled my eyes. — I didn't know that included mind reading.

— With you, it does. — He said husky. I was mesmerized about how easily this display of affection came to him. Damon seemed to read this on my expression too, because he smiled kindly and said. — Look, I just don't want you getting uncomfortable around me because things might be changing between the two of us. It's not exactly a bad change. And I meant what I said earlier, there's no need for you to be shy with me, Lainey. It is just me.

I shook my head. — But that's the point! — I argued without even thinking. My mouth just seemed to be working on it's own today. — It's you, and… I don't know how to do this.

— I could show you how. – He teased, letting his eyes purposely linger on my lips. — But, for now, let's just enjoy whatever is happening here without overthinking it. I mean, it was your advice for me, wasn't it?

I bit my lip, smiling. — Ok. Yeah, ok. — Boldly, I repeated his movements and let my hand stroke his jaw, his cheekbones… — Although I should go back to my bedroom anyway because it's getting too damn hard to share a bed with you.

Damon closed his eyes and dropped his forehead to mine, his thumb running over my lower lip. — Elena. — He whispered, even more husky than before; he never said my name like this and it was making me throw caution to the window. Without mentioning the fact he was so close I could feel his chest going up and down as breathed heavily.

— You're not making things easier for me. — I said, aching to drown in him once for all. I felt myself slipping underneath, going under and deeper, no prayer, no words, no breathing was necessary anymore. I only needed him.

Damon laughed, the sound echoing through me painfully. — I know. — Our noses were touching now, he rubbed his on mine, once, twice. I let my eyes close too. — I know that we… — He shook his head, deciding that explaining further would be verbalizing it. — But, Lainey, I won't be able to cuddle friendly with you tonight if I don't at least… And I'm not trying to scare you, ok? I promise. But… — He gulped, sighing, and the mint air coming from his mouth touched the hot skin of my face. — But I only want to kiss you, just a little, like this.

And he kissed me, so unbelievably sweetly. Just a little, just like he said he would. I never thought our first kiss would be this calm and romantic, especially when just about two second ago my body was exploding with passion. His tongue sweeped over mine and I tasted him just like I needed too. He held my face, as he was wanting to make me feel everything; and trust me, I did. And I guess the slow-motion was the right call, because if I'm already burning with such a kind kiss, I don't know if we would ever be able to stop if he kissed me right now in the Damon Salvatore style I know he's dying to as well.

Because it was slow and lovingly; God, even the little sucking of my lip he did was leisurely, but I felt like my knees were going to give out all the same — luckily I happened to be sitting on his mattress. Then, it was when occured to me that I was kissing Damon. I was kissing my best friend, while we hugged in his bed, holding onto each other like the world would end if we didn't. And it felt a thousand times better than I could ever have imagined.

Damon moaned, the proof of how much pleasure I was giving him from the simple touch of our lips and tongues; and that sound was more than enough to alight me. I felt my insides throbbing like no other man was ever capable of making me ache. He needed to pull back, he needed to pull back now.

And, when I made a move to deepen the kiss because I sure as hell only wanted to drown and fall now, he pulled back. Rather reluctantly, slowly and deeply flushed, but he pulled back.

I was feeling very sweet myself, and my heart was hammering like a loud and wide thunder on my chest, but I was the happiest I've ever been. Damon said once he was certain that I held the key to happiness, as if I knew the hidden secrets of life. But he was wrong, because the only paradise I know of tastes like his lips.

He laughed heartily; and I laughed too, risking another bold move and kissing him lovingly on the lips, just a little too, just because he felt so good and I needed to get another sample of it, for as brief as it was. No tongue was involved this time, there was only our unspoken love in its purest form.

Damon was smiling widely when he drifted apart to gaze at me. I looked down, feeling my cheeks getting red. Although I knew part of it was because his kiss had left me breathless. — Scratch whatever I said about you not needing to be shy around me. — He said. — You can blush all you want, Elena, because it's too damn cute.

He is impossible.

— Damon… — I said hesitantly, wondering if maybe this wasn't too soon. Were those hills really that far away and such a bad option? I sighed. — What does this change between us, because—

He placed a finger on my lips. — Ssssshhhh. — He leaned in to kiss the tip of my nose playfully. — It was a great kiss, and we both enjoyed immensely, but that's it for tonight. I haven't said anything yet, we're still just best friends and I won't kiss you again until you ask me to. Ok?

I looked inside of his sea of sparkling aqua-blue irises, like deep waters that floated in waves. Damon's eyes were still holding mine — and I couldn't look away from them. There were like no other eyes I had ever seen, bright as the night sky, and the black of his pupils were dilating like a cat's.

And I felt safe. Because it might be too soon, it probably is, but it's not wrong and… this is Damon, and he's my home. I came to New York looking for a new beginning, and I know I only stopped looking because I found it in him. I can't, and I won't, run away from my safe heaven. — Ok. — I whispered back, not trusting myself to say anything else.

Damon smiled all boyish, raising an eyebrow at me. — Sooo… we're good?

— Yeah, we're good. — I said, smiling back.

— And… — He pouted, looking so annoyingly adorable it made me want to kiss him again. — Will you still sleep in my bed tonight?

I laughed, all the tension and doubts leaving my body as we felt into the comfortable place we always had with one another, just without any of the hovering longing present, that seemed to be satisfied for the moment.

— You're incorrigible. — I told him. His laugh mixed with mine, and he flashed me that 250 kilowatt smile that melted everything inside me. — Yeah, I will stay. I kind of like having you as my human pillow. And, like I said, this is all because of your Egyptian sheets.

His smile grew bigger, if that was even possible. He then pulled me to his arms, lying us back on his pillows and I grabbed his white sheets to wrap around our tangled warmth bodies. — I wouldn't have let you go even if you wanted to. — He said after a while. — Because I don't think I can't sleep without you anymore, Lainey.

You can all blame Damon for the kiss. Originally it wasn't going to happen until the next chapter, but as I was re-reading to post it, he practically begged me to let him kiss her, and who am I to deny him anything?

They are going to visit Jeremy on the next one. See you soon. And thanks for reading!

Have a wonderful week!