Heya everyone. hope everyone had an amazing Christmas. So here is the next chapter. This story will be coming to an end soon if i can get my butt in gear before i go back to uni which is in 3 weeks or so. Anyway, carry on reading and i will see you at the bottom.
Bella's POV
"Right, before we even think about going to Volterra, we need to go somewhere and make a plan. And I think it would be a good idea if we all hunted first." Jasper said as we got into a car that Peter had…picked up. In the current situation I wasn't opposed to stealing a car.
"I have a small house a few miles away. I never thought about getting a house here, but Charlotte liked it here so much that we got one." Peter said as he sat in the back seat.
"Do I even want to know how you got enough money to get a house?" Jasper asked.
"You really don't." Peter replied
I didn't ask any questions. Now that I was actually in Italy, I was even more determined to get Charlotte back. I was even considering arguing with Jasper about hunting first, but I knew that would be a waste of breath.
We only drove for about thirty minutes before Peter showed Jasper where to pull up. The house that Jasper parked outside of was no bigger than my house back in the states. It was somewhere I could see Peter and Charlotte living.
"When was the last time you were here?" I asked him, as we walked into the house.
"As soon as we left you, we came back here for a while. Charlotte was so dedicated to your way of living, she even carried on with it when we were here." Peter said as he walked further into the house.
I felt so proud of Charlotte to know that she was still trying to live off animal blood rather than killing people.
"How are you coping with the change in diet?" Jasper asked.
"Fine, but right now, I need as much of my strength as I can get, so if you don't mind, im going to go on my own to hunt. If you two need to go, take the car a few miles down the road and there is a large forested area. That is where we went if we were here." Peter said, giving Jasper the keys to the car.
"Thank you. Come on, I need to hunt. My throat is burning. I want to be in Volterra by no later than tomorrow afternoon." I said. I looked over at the clock on the wall in the room. It was now 11.30 in the night. I knew it would take us a good few hours to have a good and proper hunt so we wouldn't be back here until the early hours of the morning, then we would leave for Volterra before the sun was up. If what I had in mind worked, I would have Charlotte back within the next 24 hours.
We all left the house the same time, but we went different ways. Me and Jasper got into the car while peter walked down the street. I didn't want to know where Peter was going. Jasper got into the driver side of the car and drove away. I knew that he was worried about me because he didn't know what was going on. I didn't know what was going on, but I knew that I needed to focus on Charlotte before anything else.
We drove in silence to the area where Peter said we could hunt. Jasper didn't say a word to me the whole ride there. I knew that he was thinking about what had happened to me while we were on the plane earlier. I was still trying to figure it out myself, so I was kind of glad that Jasper was keeping his thought to himself. The car ride took under 20 minutes, as soon as we stopped I got out of the car and looked around to see if I could catch the scent of anything. Jasper came over to me and took my hand, he looked over at me and smiled slightly at me.
"Walk with me." He said as he began to pull me into the woods.
"I need to hunt Jasper." I said as I followed him.
"So do I, but I need to talk to you first. Come on." He said as he continued to walk.
I knew what was coming. Jasper and I hadn't actually been able to talk about what was happening yet, and I knew that he wanted me to talk about my feelings. I really didn't want to have this conversation with him, because I was only allowing him to feel the tip of what I was actually feeling right now. I know that even if I let him feel the full intensity of my emotions right now, it would bring him to his knees. Hell, the only reason I haven't been crushed with it is because I have a need inside me that is telling me to get through this for my daughters sake, I need to be strong for her. I have no idea what will happen. If anything will happen to me when I get her back.
We continued to walk further and further into the woods, before Jasper stopped us and turned to face me.
"How are you feeling Bella?" Jasper asked me. I looked at him confused. Was he really asking me this?
"What? You know what I'm feeling Jasper." I said as I stepped to the side away from him.
"That's the thing, I don't! What I'm getting off you now isn't what I was getting off you when we were back home. You have been hiding what you are feeling from me. Why?" he asked as he followed my path.
"Because I don't want anyone else to go through what I am." I told him, turning around to face him.
"But Bella, how can I help you, support you with this if I don't know what you are feeling." Jasper said taking my hands again.
"I CANT PUT YOU THROUGH THIS!" I screamed at him. I actually made myself jump. I didn't mean for that to escape.
"Jasper, I love you too much to let you feel all of this. It is taking all my energy to block you as much as I am. It takes more energy than I actually have to stand up and move. You don't know what this feels like, to have someone you love so much get taken away from you." I told him.
"You're wrong. I do know what it feels like. You don't know what it did to me when you left. It killed me. I didn't do anything for weeks and weeks. I just stayed in the house, I barely hunted at all. I came looking for you because I knew that you were the only thing that I wanted. I know what it feels like to have the most important thing in your life not be with you. It is just as hard for me to see you like this. It is even harder knowing that you won't let me help you." Jasper said, still holding my hands.
"Jasper, I'm sorry that I put you through that, but I need to do this on my own. I will not inflict what I am feeling on to someone I love so much. Please, I don't want to hurt you." I begged him, tears building up in my eyes, at the thought of him feeling what I was right now.
"Bella, im a lot stronger than you think I am. And you will be to if. You. Let. Me. Help." Jasper said the last few words one by one as he took my face in his hands and looked in my eyes.
I could tell from his eyes that this was killing him. That he could see how this affected me, but because I wasn't letting him fell the full effect of what I was feeling, he didn't know how to help me. And I have a strange feeling that that was new for him. He always knew what to do.
"Fine." Giving up arguing with him about this.
Jasper leaned in and kissed me softly, making it slightly easier for me to let go of my emotions. I knew how much he loved me and that he was willing to go through so much emotional pain to help me. He continued to kiss me as I began to let go of what I had been bottling up for the last few days. As soon as I let it go, there was nothing that I could do to control my physical actions. I fell to the floor with Jaspers arms around me and screamed. It physically hurt when I finally let all my emotions free. Jasper still held onto me even as i fell to the ground. I didn't look at him, because I knew that I couldn't bear to see him in pain.
I left all my emotions go waiting for Jasper to break. But he didn't. After a few minutes, I felt the pain begin to leave. I sighed and allowed myself to relax into Jasper arms. It literally felt that a huge weight has been taken off me, even if it was only for a short period of time. I felt so much light after Jasper had helped me cope with this. I stayed in his arms a few seconds longer before I pulled him back down to me and kissed him. Over the last few days, my feelings for Jasper had been pushed to the back of my mind, over the worry I was feeling for Charlotte, but now that those feelings had been lessened I realised just how much I needed him. How much I loved him.
He wrapped his arms around me and held me to his body and he continued to kiss me. I put my hands on his face as I pulled away.
"Thank you." I whispered, smiling at him.
He kissed me softly again before smiling back at me.
"You're welcome. Please, never do this to me again. Never hide from me Bella." He asked me, looking in my eyes.
"I promise." I said again before he pulled me up off the ground, bringing my hands to his lips, he kissed the back of my hands lightly.
"Right, I promise that we will go hunting, but I need to talk to you about something else before we do." He said.
"What is it? " I asked him, I could tell her was worried about something, and I had a strange feeling I knew what it was about.
"What was the matter with you on the plane ride over here?" he asked me.
"I told you, I don't know. But I have a feeling that whatever it is will still be there after I get Charlotte back." I said as tired to move away from him so that I could go hunting, but Jasper held me back.
"But Bella, I'm worried about this now. It isn't normal for a vampire to sleep, it really isn't normal for a vampire to be sick." Jasper said as he held me back.
"How do you know I was sick?" I asked.
"I could taste the blood on your lips when I kissed you, and you hadn't been hunting since a few days before, so you couldn't even say it was from a fresh hunt." Jasper said.
I"I don't know what to say. It isn't even as if I can get a stomach bug or something…" I said trailing off as my mind wondered off to the impossible.
No! I couldn't be. It was impossible. But everything linked together. Change in sleeping habits (Well that wasn't hard!) sudden mood changes ( Not that you can blame me) and throwing my guts up (Ok, I had no excuse for that one ). I dropped Jasper hand and put my hands on my head.
"Bella, what's wrong?" he asked me, yet more concern lacing his voice
"I might be pregnant." I said. Saying it out loud only made it more real in my mind. That was the only logical thing that made sense right now.
"You cant be Bella. It's impossible. Vampires can't have children, you know this." Jasper explained.
"I know that, but I'm not exactly a normal vampire am I? I'm the only vampire that I know of that can cry. With tears." I said to him.
"Yes, I know but keeping that small part of your humanity doesn't mean that you can have children again." He said again, sounding flustered. I wonder if the idea was going through his mind right now.
"But it is still a part of what I was like when I am human. Jasper, are you honestly saying that there isn't the slightest, tidy chance that by keeping that part of me human, there could also be other aspects that are human." I asked him. He didn't answer me, but he looked like he was going to argue with me so I started talking again.
"I honestly believe that I was put on this planet for a reason. I always have, and that was to be around children and to love them. What is this is supposed happen to me again. You know that I feel different around children compared to anyone else you know. It is more than a maternal instinct for me. I need children around me to function. Have you never thought it strange for a vampire to open a day nursery?" I asked him.
"Yes, but not with you. You're special." He said.
"Exactly! So if I am special, why would it be so strange that I be allowed to be a mother again." I asked him.
He didn't answer me again, but I could tell from the look I his eyes that he wasn't going to answer me, or argue with me for that matter.
"I will talk to Carlisle when we get back. But first I need to hunt and then I am getting my daughter. Please think about what I have said. The more you think about it, the more it will make sense." I told him as I left his side and ran through the forest looking for my first meal. It didn't take long before I sensed Jasper following me.
So what do you think? I am thinking about writting a sequal to this, with the pregnancy and everything, but i really need your thought on this chapter, so please, i need your reviews for this chapter if i can even start planning a new story. so let me know ASAP! so im going to get started on the next chapter. hopefully hear from you soon.
XXCullenXX
xxx