And everyone is dead...right? No?

Hidden Secrets Brought to Light - Part 2 of 3

"Xander? Did you say something?" Giles asked him. "Huh? What?" he said blinking and looking around at everyone, alive. "Ahh…no… my mind…wandered…its back now." He said with a sheepish grin. His daydream (day-nightmare...daymare?) of Angelus's killing spree faded as he focused back on reality.

Angelus took the offered knife from Willow and turned the blade towards himself, running one hand along his upper right chest, feeling…searching.

He found the spot he wanted and quickly pushed the tip of the dagger in, opening a two inch wide slit.

He grimaced and handed the knife back to the witch and reached his forefinger and thumb into the wound.

He gritted his teeth as his fingers moved; a few long seconds later he pulled them out, holding a small bloody bullet.

He opened his fingers and let the projectile fall haphazardly to the floor of the van. "Was easier when I was dead" he grumbled as his eyes closed, he coughed wetly and leaned his head back onto Buffy's shoulder.

Willow placed a bandage from the first aid kit over the small wound and applied pressure to stem the bleeding.

"Thanks Will, for understanding" Buffy said as she took over applying pressure.

"I don't." she replied, "Understand I mean. This is really giving me a major wiggins Buffy. I know you want to save Angel, and well I trust you. Even if I don't like it…or trust Angelus…but you have never led us wrong…So I'll trust and help you no matter what."

A tear slid down Buffy's cheek, "I don't know to thank you, Will"

"O, I'll think of ways" she smiled, "Lots and lots of ways."

Buffy gave her friend a weak laugh, "I bet."

At that, Oz turned the van back onto the road and continued to drive.

...

The van had eaten away a few miles, the only sounds inside were the small rocks the tires picked up and flung against the undercarriage and the awful noise that passed for breathes from Angelus.

"So how is…ahh...he…doing?" Willow asked, motioning towards Angelus.

Buffy looked down at him, her heart clenching at how pale he was. She placed her free fingers over the pulse of his neck.

"I think he passed out" she frowned, "His pulse is racing but it weak; he's breathing, but barely."

Willow nodded; she could hear the rasp of his breaths from where she had sat across the van.

Giles moved closer, still keeping a respectful distance from the unconscious vampire, and asked "This has happened before, yes? The Angelus transformation I mean."

Buffy nodded, "When we fought Cerberus. Angel would have died if Angelus hadn't taken over."

All their eyes moved to the faint scar the sword wound had left on Angel's side.

"You didn't feel the need to mention this when we rescued you?" He asked, not bothering to hide his anger at them for keeping such a secret.

She shook her head at him, "No, and for the exact same reason I didn't run and tell you all when Angel came back from Hell. I knew how you would react. You proved it today."

Giles winced, "Well Buffy, I have to admit I'm very disappointed in you. Again you withheld information that could very well get us killed…."

"Angel wanted to tell you guys." She admitted, "But I asked him not to. You two have been against him from day one." She shot Giles and Xander a glace, "I had no intention of giving you more ammo to fire back at him."

"We still had a right to know," Xander piped in, "the fact you didn't trust us…"

"I didn't trust you?" Buffy shot back, "I wanted more than anything to trust you. Trusting you got Angel killed in the first place."

Xander's eyes widened, "What?" he asked looking around.

"Willow said…Kick his ass" Buffy repeated the words Xander said to her years ago outside the mansion, when she was about to face Angelus and Acathla. "You never told me Willow was trying the restoration spell again, if you had, I could have stalled him. Instead I found out too late."

A tear fell down her cheek, "And you made me kill him, you made me send him to Hell."

Giles was at a loss and Willow glared angrily at Xander.

He shriveled against the side of the van under the assault of eyes. "He was evil!" he tried to defend his actions.

"Shut up Xander" Willow threatened; the tone coming from her was uncharacteristically cold, it wasn't a Willow tone.

He didn't say another word for a long time.

"Thanks for Hell" Angelus mumbled, but his eyes remained shut.

'Damn!' Buffy thought, 'He's been listening the whole time? Crap!'

"Angelus? Can you hear me?" Buffy asked, unconsciously wiping blood from his lips.

"Hmmm" he growled.

"How are you doing?" She asked realizing he seemed to be getting worse.

"Been…better" he mumbled between a cough. A beat later he added, "Been dead too".

He opened his eyes, yellow orbs meeting green. "Sorry Slayer," he struggled, "Bleedin…stopped…too late."

"What?" she gasped, "What do you mean?"

"Body's…dyin. Lost…too much…blood" he said slowly. His breaths came in short gasps, and his heart raced, beating frantically to pump blood that was no longer in his body. "When…heart stops…soul lost…kill you." He looked up, making sure she got the message.

He might not want to kill her now, but when his heart stops beating, the body dies, Angel's soul vacates and he reverts to all evil blood-lusty vampire again.

She put her wrist against his mouth, "If you need blood drink mine!" She panicked at the idea Angel would die. 'He can't die! Not now!'

Angelus just looked at her, then down at her wrist.

"Uhh…Buffy, is that wise?" Giles spoke up, but he was ignored.

"Please" Buffy pleaded into Angelus's ear, "I can't lose him, not now."

"You're…sure?" he asked, glancing back into her eyes. "I'm sure" she replied.

She pushed her arm up against his fangs and he latched his mouth around the two small holes.

He sucked the wounds, enjoying the taste of the warm blood as it flowed down his throat, the tingling of her blood against his teeth, Slayer blood.

Her heart beating wildly with fear encouraged him, calling to his dark nature.

His own heart hammered along with hers, enjoying the thrall of it.

Then there was another beating, fast, very fast. He barely had three mouthfuls when he tasted something different in her blood. He quickly pulled her arm from his mouth and placed his fingers over the puncture wounds to stop the bleeding.

"That couldn't have been enough" she responded to his sudden rejection.

She would have argued further but she saw something flash in his eyes, a confusion, like he was trying to remember something.

"Can't drink your blood" he said flatly.

"You nearly drained me before!" Her panic surfacing again, remembering her graduation day, "I survived that!"

His yellow eyes stared right into her green ones, "You weren't pregnant then." he answered toneless.

A collective gasp went through the 'audience'.

Her eyes widened, she couldn't believe she hadn't even thought of that.

"Oh…right" she said sheepishly. She glanced up at her friends, they all looked back sympathetically at her, even Oz who had pulled the van over to listen.

They all finally understood her desperation.

"Ahh…Congratulations Buffy!" Willow said enthusiastically, "How far along are you?"

"My God Buffy" Giles, moved over towards her, "Why didn't you tell us?"

She looked down at nothing in particular, "Almost 10 weeks Will" she tried to smile then frowned "Angel didn't know yet" she whispered, "Now everyone knows before him…."

A collective wince went through the Scooby's.

Buffy focused her attention back to Angelus, "Was that enough?" she asked hopeful.

He looked up at her, then away, but didn't reply.

She felt tears threatening to fall again.

Silence fell, save for Angelus's raspy breaths.

...

"I'm a blood donor" Willow spoke up after a few awkward minutes.

Buffy looked up at her and she continued, "You know, I could…uhh…donate?"

"I can't ask you to do that Will" Buffy said sadly.

"Well, you didn't ask...I just offered, remember." She looked to Angelus, "That is if it works for you. Does that work for you?"

He glanced up to the redhead, "Blood is blood" he replied wearily.

"I do not understand" Giles inserted, "I thought you said Angelus couldn't drink blood any longer."

"No, I said he doesn't crave it, not that he can't drink it. Angel's body makes it's own blood now, so the demon usually feeds off that, but in desperate situations...like when he's hurt...bad..." Buffy trailed off, grief closing down her throat.

"Yeah, offer me a jelly donut and I'll eat it if I'm hungry or not" Xander joked, a glare from the Scooby's shot him down. "And now back to shutting up" he mumbled to himself.

"Willow?" Oz's voice was thick with concern.

He pulled he van to the side of the road, not that there was anyone else driving nearby, and joined them in the back.

"I'll be fine Oz, don't worry" she reassured him, then she turned back to face Angelus, "Right? Nothing to worry about? I won't become a vamp or anything?"

He grinned, "Not unless you want to. Made a pretty good one as I recall."

Her cheeks went red at the memory of her alternate universe vampire double.

"Don't start" Buffy chastised the vamp, "No Will, You'll be fine" She said still glaring at the vamp. "Right?"

His grin never faded, "Anything you want Lover."

'My blood may not have been enough to heal him, but it certainly sparked his attitude.' The slayer thought dryly.

...

A few minutes later Willow was sitting cross legged in front of Buffy and Angelus.

'She hasn't moved or let go of him once since they sat there' Willow thought idly, trying to think of anything but the fact she was about to let herself be freely bitten by Angelus.

'Funny, I thought handing him a knife was the trauma of my day.'

She smiled at Buffy, and then offered her arm as Buffy had a few minutes ago.

Angelus gently held her arm, "You're sure?" he asked looking into her eyes.

"Yeah" she squeaked, those yellow eyes throwing her into a major wiggins.

"Say when" he added dryly. He gripped tighter, not painful but enough to keep her arm from thrashing, and bit. Willow gasped at the sudden pain; Oz placed a hand on her shoulder, anxious about the girls safely.

Angelus removed his fangs and let the blood flow freely into his mouth, the witch's blood was heavy with power. He felt her heart beating, fear making the blood sweet, he counted them, the beats; centuries drinking blood taught him to read the beats.

He knew exactly how many mouthfuls he could take until the person felt faint, how many until they fell unconscious, and how many until the heart stopped.

"Umm…ok…starting to get dizzy" Willow worried, looking down at the vampire latched onto her arm.

Angelus knew she wasn't in any danger yet, merely weak from fear. He continued to drink, listening to her heartbeat.

Oz Growled.

"Angelus." Buffy warned, noticing Willows growing distress.

Buffy had expected him to stop immediately when Willow spoke, and when he didn't she took quick action. Her hand when around Angelus's neck, and squeezed with enough pressure to get his attention but not to hurt him…too much.

"She said stop" the Slayer hissed into his ear.

Angelus immediately released Willow, leaning back and letting his tongue clean his fangs.

Xander sent the vampire a glare, but kept silent.

Buffy scowled down at the vamp, He glanced up and smirked, "Relax slayer, she wasn't in any danger; didn't take any more than the blood bank would have."

"You OK Will?" Buffy asked the witch who was leaning against Oz.

"Yeah, I…I think so. Just a bit woozy." Oz pulled her against the side of the van and sat with her much like Buffy and Angelus.

"How about you?" Buffy asked to the vamp lying against her.

"Lost a lot more than I gained" he replied. She placed her fingers on his neck and felt his pulse; it was better, but still fast and weak.

"I'll volunteer too. Not a big fan of Angelus here, but I like Angel. He's a cool guy." Oz spoke up.

Angelus looked him up and down. "Not a chance" he retorted

"No?" Oz asked, face mostly expressionless but still clearly hurt that his offer was being so quickly snuffed.

"Lycanthrope, a curse in the blood" Angelus answered. "Sounds like it could be a fun experiment. Vampire and werewolf hybrid, but I'm not volunteering. Got enough problems between myself and Soulboy to add another demon into the mix."

Oz nodded, "Point taken."

The part time werewolf looked back down at to Willow. "You all right?"

She smiled at him, "I'm OK Oz, really. And I'm very proud of you, offering your blood and all. Even if it's cursed. Oh in a good way I mean. Think my brain is still a little zonked." She said with a frown.

"I can deal with zonked" he said with a slight grin.

He placed a quick kiss on her forehead, "Gunna get back to the road now" and he made his way back to the driver's seat.

A few minutes later the van was rolling down the highway, still not another car in sight.

...

Giles came over and sat across from the slayer and her vampire. "I must admit Buffy, Lord knows I am not entirely comfortable with some of the choices you have made in your life. But I do understand it is your life. Perhaps I could give you more encouragement and less grief about those choices. I also admit in the recent past I've been rather hash towards Angel. In light of the current situation, I find a blood donation could be useful, especially if I wish to see him live long enough to speak to him about the matter and apologize properly."

Buffy smiled at him, "Thank you, Giles."

Giles turned his focus to the paler than normal vampire, "However, I cannot say the same for you. You murdered the woman I loved, tortured me mercilessly, and deeply hurt the people closest to me. I will never forgive you for those atrocities."

Angelus looked him up and down, "Wouldn't believe you if you said you did."

He paused then quickly added, "If it's any consolation, I killed her quick."

"Angelus!" Buffy scolded, but not entirely shocked at his words, it really threw her how different the 'souled' and 'unsouled' versions of her lover were.

Giles went ridged. "No, it isn't really. However, coming for you, that is most likely the closest to sympathy one could expect."

Giles quickly shed his tweed jacket and rolled his left sleeve up. "Yes, well, let's get this over and done with shall we. I find my tolerance for you has waned."

Angelus wrapped cold fingers around the offered arm, gave the watcher one last look, and then sank his teeth into flesh.

Pain flashed across the English librarian's face, but he quickly pushed it aside. Images of Jenny Calendar, his torture, and the six months of Angelus's rein over Sunnydale flashed through his mind; the pain from the bite was minuscule by comparison.

Angelus greedily drank the offered blood; he reveled in the fact Angel would be horrified he had drank the blood of Buffy and her friends.

Angelus listened to the watcher's heartbeat, he felt it with every gush of blood that entered his mouth. He felt the darkness in the watcher, Ripper, locked away much as he had been within Angel all those years.

'Giles would make an amazing vampire', he thought leisurely, 'Advance knowledge of the occult, demons and literature, years of watcher training, skills as a warrior, and the wonderful darkness that already exists within. He could be a vampire king*.'

Pressure against his throat returned Angelus's attention back to his victim, he sensed the increase in heart rate in the watcher, the signal to let go without causing harm.

The vampire released the other man's arm; Giles quickly plugged the twin wounds with a pad of gauze Willow handed him.

"Heart isn't what it used to be, is it old man?" Angelus taunted the slightly pale watcher.

Giles glared at him a moment, then bit back a response, deciding the demon wasn't worth the effort.

Buffy shot the vampire a disapproving glace.

"Are you OK, Giles?"

"I've been worse, Buffy." He answered truthfully. He sat down next to Willow, and rested his back and head against the wall of the van.

Buffy placed her fingers against Angelus's throat again, his pulse was still weak, but his heart no longer beat frantically for blood.

"Guess you're stuck with me for a while longer, Buff." Angelus scoffed.

The terror that Angel would die today subsided, Angelus was weak, but for the moment, stable.

...

"Still accepting donations?" Xander asked from his corner of the van.

Both Buffy and Angelus looked over at him in shock.

"You're kidding right?" the demon asked.

"That's not necessary, Xander" Buffy said sincerely, "But thanks for offering."

"No I think it is." Xander continued, "I admit it. I don't like Angel." He looked directly into Angelus's eyes, "And I really hate you."

Angelus growled.

Xander looked back to Buffy, "I know I can never make amends for what I put you through Buff, but I'd like to take the first step in the right direction. If you let me."

She stared at him for a moment, thinking over what he had just said.

"Fine" she finally answered, "But don't expect me to stop Angel if he decides to beat the crap out of you."

Xander winced, "I can live with that…unless he kills me" Xander pulled the sleeve of his shirt up to expose the naked flesh.

He extended his arm and the demon grabbed it, tight enough to bruise.

Angelus's lip curled into a grim smirk. "Feelings mutual, boy."

"No permanent damage" Buffy urged into the demon's ear.

'O god, this is going to suck big time' Xander thought to himself, 'pun intended' he added miserably.

Angelus growled in response, a second later he buried his fangs into Xander's arm. Out of spite, he sank his teeth in far deeper than was necessary, thoroughly enjoying the yelp of pain it brought from the boy.

The demon relaxed his jaw, letting the blood flow down his throat. The blood lost some of its vigor now that his body wasn't desperate for it, but it did empower him; helping to recharge his sapped strength.

A long minute later, Angelus practically spit Xander's arm from his mouth.

Xander gasped at the freely bleeding wound.

Before anyone could react, Angelus shot from Buffy's lap and slammed Xander against the side of the van, causing the van to rock sideways for a second and forcing Willow and Giles to duck out of the way.

Oz immediately steered the van into the breakdown lane.

"If you think that was painful, try experiencing 100 years in Hell!" Angelus growled at the suspended Xander, his claws clenched tightly around the boy's neck.

"ANGELUS!" Buffy yelled as she shot to her feet, fearing he would kill Xander.

"I should have killed you." he growled and opened his claws, letting a dazed and coughing Xander crumple to the floor.

Buffy grabbed onto Angelus, yanked him away from the struggling man at his feet.

Willow and Giles rushed forward to help Xander.

Angelus felt his soul rebel at him; he let himself be pulled back.

Buffy was about to scream at Angelus, or possibly knock him out, when the demon's features disappeared, leaving Angel's chocolate brown eyes blinking at her.

"Buffy?" he managed before his eyes rolled back in his head and his legs buckled from beneath him.

She dashed forward, bracing him and controlling his fall.

"Angel!" she cried, as she leaned him again the wall of the van. She checked his pulse if found it strong and steady, his breathing clear and even. She let out a sigh of relief, and then turned her attention back to Xander.

"That bastard tied to kill me!" Xander yelled between chokes and coughs.

"No, you're really lucky he didn't" she said as she knelt in front of him. "Anything serious?" she asked as she looked him over.

"Pretty sure my pride and dignity suffered lethal blows" he grumbled.

He had some nasty looking bruises forming on his neck and a few shallow scratched on this throat from Angelus's claws. Plus the bite wound. She glanced up at the wall of the van and noticed the dent.

'Back will be sore tomorrow' she thought.

Xander glanced behind her, and noticed Angel propped up against the wall. "Angelus is gone?" he asked.

"Yeah" she nodded. "The change seems to knock Angel out for a while."

"Kind of envy the guy, unconsciousness sounds like a paradise vacation right about now." Xander mumbled.

Giles turned to Oz who had been watching the scene since he pulled the van off the road, "Everything seems to be back in order, Oz; Let us resume the drive shall we?"

Satisfied the excitement was over, Oz shrugged and went back to the driver's seat.

Giles settled himself down in the passenger seat, needing to get as far away from the near constant chaos as possible.

Willow and Buffy quickly patched up Xander as best they could with the dwindling first aid supplies.

When everything returned to 'normal' Buffy finally let herself relax a bit. She stood and looked around, everyone besides Oz, seemed to be either unconscious, asleep or very close to sleep.

She glanced down at herself and was stricken by the amount of blood drenching almost her entire outfit. "O God" she whispered, finally understanding just how close to dying Angel had come.

She walked the few steps to him and slid down beside him, resting her head against his chest, careful to avoid his half-healed injuries. The thump of his beating heart reassured her he was alive, exhaustion factored in with the relief and she quickly fell asleep to the sound.

An hour later than van pulled up to the first building in a long time.

The Last Rest Motel, read the neon red sign, well more accurately, T e st Res tel, if you factored in the burned out letters.

Oz turned in the driver's seat and whistled loudly into the back.

Three of the five in the van woke and looked around for the source of their rude awakening. When they turned toward him he gestured to the visible motel sign. "Bed?"

Buffy reluctantly stood, shaking sleep from her eyes. Willow and Giles got groggily to their feet as well.

Willow gently shook Xander, "Not the gumdrop buttons!" he yelped, once awake he looked around confused for a second then added embarrassed, "I have a lot of childhood trauma."

Oz and Giles made their way to the office to book the rooms. A few minutes later they returned with keys to the three rooms closest to the van; being 5,6 and 7.

Oz and Giles helped Xander up and into the first room, number 5.

Willow handed Buffy key number 7, and kept number 6 for her and Oz.

Buffy knelt beside Angel and gently patted his face. "Angel?" she called to him, "I need you wake up. Just for a minute, please?"

A few seconds later he groaned, his eyes fluttering open, and focused on her face.

"We need to move, Ok?" she encouraged and tugged at his arms. She could tell he wasn't fully conscious, but he responded to her commands, and rose unsteadily to his feet.

Willow helped Buffy brace him as they walked to their room. A minute later Angel was sitting on the bed and Buffy was saying goodnight to those who were still awake.

Buffy closed and locked the door; she began to peel off her ruined clothes and though of sleeping for a month.

She had just unbuttoned the shirt when she realized Angel was no longer sitting on the bed. She look down at the floor beside the bed but didn't see him there, she heard the shower turn on and noticed the bathroom door was closed.

'He might be on to something' she thought as she looked down at her blood stained skin.

She moved over to the door and knocked, "Angel?" she called.

He didn't respond, so she tried the knob; thankfully it was unlocked. Not that she couldn't have forced it...

She opened the door and stepped inside, closing it behind her.

His back was to her, and her breath caught in her throat when she saw the blood covering it. She noticed his back matched his blood stains on her chest.

"Angel?" she called again, then reached out and touched his arm.

He jumped, startled. "Sorry" she winced.

He nodded, still out of it.

She reached out and helped him remove his belt and pants then into the hot water. A few seconds later she had stripped and joined him.

Under better circumstances, sharing the shower with Angel would have defiantly led to much intimate and erotic behavior. However, neither of them had the extra energy to spend.

Quickly they scrubbed off as much blood from their bodies as possible and within 5 minutes were toweling themselves dry.

Neither of them bothered to put their ruined clothes back on; walking to the bed Buffy grimaced at the numerous dark bruises that covered Angel's back and chest.

They barely stayed awake long enough to shut the lights and pull the covers over themselves.

...

Angel awoke with a start.

Nightmares had riddled him for a majority of the night, actually that was a lie; memories of the previous few hours as Angelus had ravaged his mind.

He had said things, done things, but none more horrifying as drinking from Buffy, and her friends.

He stole a glance over at the woman sleeping on the other side of the bed.

He was thankful of the space between them, he didn't deserve her touch.

His body felt much how he imagined a well used punching bag would feel. Angelus had exhausted all his healing power to repair the more fatal injuries to 'their' body, leaving the minor wounds still open and raw.

Angel slowly and painfully climbed from the bed, careful not to wake the sleeping slayer. He become starkly aware of his nakedness a few seconds later.

'Can't go out like this' he though idly.

He quietly searched the bathroom floor for his previously discarded pants, which he quickly found, thanks to his night vision, balled in the corner.

He stifled a groan, and as silently as possible slid the on, grimacing at the feeling of his dried blood on them. He hoped the black of his pants would mask the blood stains to the casual observer.

'Pants…check. Still missing, shirt, shoes, keys and money…..damn.'

Angel tip-toed to the door dividing rooms 6 and 7, and tried the knob, unlocked. He let out a sigh, then proceeded to sneak into the room. He could make out Oz and Willow curled around one another on the queen bed, careful not to wake them he snatched the keys to the van and Oz's wallet off the bedside table, and after a beat, grabbed Oz's button down shirt off the chair.

He retreated back to his room with the stolen goods and closed the door.

He cast a glace towards Buffy, still sleeping; 'She must be more tired than I thought,' he was amazed she hadn't awakened and caught him creeping about.

Before his luck could run out he unlocked his room door, and snuck out into the night.

He shrugged on the too small shirt, and winced from the pain it brought to his still sore shoulders, and stuck the wallet in his pocket. He unlocked the van and started the engine, and quickly drove away before the sound could rouse the gang.

...

Buffy awoke to the sounds of an engine starting; she didn't think much of it and rolled over, reaching out to Angel just to confirm he was still there.

He wasn't.

She sat up and looked around, "Angel?" she called, but received no reply.

She rolled over and turned on the bedside lamp, shooting a quick glace at the clock, 6:43am, and looked around the room for her love.

He was gone; a nagging fear crawled up her spine as she rose from the bed and wrapped a sheet around herself as makeshift clothing.

She glanced out the window and knew she wouldn't see the van; and she didn't.

Looking around more she discovered his pants were gone and the door between her room and Willow and Oz's was partly open. She glanced inside and realized Oz's wallet and keys were missing.

She closed the door and sat back down heavily on the bed. "Angel, where the hell did you go?" she whispered to herself. 'Did he leave me again?' she wondered, heart constricting painfully.

...

Did he leave again!?

I know, I know...again with a cliffhanger...I'm notorious for these.

- Giles a vampire king * Idea taken from Buffy book The Lost Slayer, by Christopher Golden.* Good read if you haven't.