A/N: I don't own this, we all know who does. If I did, Rpattz would be taking me out on a date tonight. It's Friday night, he could at least feed me. :D But since he's not, maybe I'll let hub's take me. :D

This is unbeta'd, so any and all mistakes belong to me. My eyes are blurry from all the review replies I've been typing. I think I'm about half way done. Which sounds good until I realize I have another 150 to go. :D I'm getting there...

This is for my wifey, Mrs. Robward. If only I lived closer to her... She's got the weekend to herself, which would mean I would have her weekend to myself... :D Oh, the things we could do. :D

Thanks to Luxure & EdwardsBloodType for prereading this. They're cute and I hear they've discussed kissing girls. Why was I not in on that conversation? :D

**disclaimer **

This story is a bit taboo. In case you're confused, last chapter was Bella thinking, remembering. This chapter is Edward thinking, remembering their "first time" together. This is still the night of prom, so he just left her house a few hours before. He's still sad... :(

~:O:~:O:~:O:~

… Chapter Twelve - Backseat … Edward …

~:O:~:O:~:O:~

I grip my cock tighter, pulling harder as I stare at your face in the picture.

You were amazing, the most perfect thing I've ever seen.

I imagine what it would have been like to get you alone after a game, to lift your skirt and slide over your bloomers. Touching you would have been heaven, my tongue seeking out the sticky, trembling flesh between your thighs.

Watching you kick and dance would have made me so hard. I would have grabbed you after each game, pulling you somewhere quiet, alone, where I could grab you, touch you, fuck you. Every time.

As I jerk, my hold tightening, I see stars, recalling the first night I had you in my car.

The backseat was small, but we fit. You and I, fumbling in the backseat together.

The parking lot was dark, deserted, and I had dark tint on my windows. You were nervous, but I was relentless. I had to have you, had to feel you, lick you. I couldn't wait any longer.

There had been days filled with random touches, glances, even a few kisses and gropings. But no intercourse, and I ached for it.

I had sex before, it wasn't my first time. I had sex with Leah a few times before finally getting you alone. I felt bad using her, but once I met you, shook your hand on the front porch that day, I knew there was something more. I had to have you.

Even though it was wrong.

I didn't care.

The night was hot, summer, we were sweating on the leather seats. After laying you down, stripping you and pushing into your wet heat for the second time that night, I reached over, cracking the window open. I needed the cooler air on my skin. You liked the sweat, said it made me glisten.

"Hey, Cullen!" came a yell from outside.

"Shit!" I mumbled. Your eyes were huge.

"No one can find me, do you understand that?" you said, panicking.

"Yeah, I know."

Your head was close to the door, the window barely open. The boys outside couldn't see much, if anything. I reached over, locking the doors.

Riley's face peered into the window crack. "What are you doing in there?" he asked. "Holy fuck, you got a girl in there?"

You cringed, turning your head to the side, letting your hair hide your face. Just in case they saw something.

"Yeah, get outta here."

I was buried in you, and I knew as the guys gathered around the window that they could see where we were joined, how bare you were for me. They could see your tits, too, and I leaned up, growling at them to leave.

It made me proud that they saw us, saw you, especially when I heard them saying how hot you were.

I pumped a few times, letting them watch, before grabbing your tit with one hand, and hitting the window button with the other. Show was over.

They left, giving us our time alone.

"You can look, they're gone."

You breathed heavy. "Did they see me?"

I smiled. "Depends what you mean by that."

Your eyes told me you didn't understand.

"Did they see your tits? Yeah," I said, thrusting into you a few times.

"Did they see your pussy? Oh yeah," I said, thrusting harder.

"Did they see me fucking you? You better believe it," I said, pushing harder still.

"And you know what? They were all hard for you, I could tell. They were jealous, watching me fuck you like this."

You moaned, reaching up to run your fingers along my chest.

"Did you like that? Letting my friends watch us fucking each other?"

"Yes," you moaned.

"You're a dirty girl, aren't you, baby? You like it hot and dirty, don't you? You little choir girl, you like it rough and bad, don't you? Tell me, Bella."

I pounded harder and harder into you, not stopping until I felt you let go, moaning and crying out as you came on my dick.

Squeezing your tits in my hands, I came, shooting my cum deep into your body.

I couldn't stop, I needed the connection with you too much.

We lay on the seat for hours, until you had to go home. The sun was rising, and he would be asking where you'd been.

Watching you walk away from my car, knowing you would be with him, nearly killed me.

But I let you go.

You didn't belong to me.

Not yet, anyway.

I continue to jerk my cock, remembering how perfect you'd been that night.

Thick spurts of cum land on my bare stomach, covering my hand.

As I lay there, remembering you, a tear slides down my face, rolling into my hair.

I miss you. So much.

It has only been a few hours.

I will never make it.

I belong with you.

~:O:~:O:~:O:~

A/N: Ohhhh, he's still so sad. :(

Next chapter. Maybe, if you don't mind me not doing review replies for a few chapters, I can post 3 or 4 tomorrow. Let me know...are you willing to give up my pretty and well thought out replies? Wait, I was kinda tired on a few of them, so sorry if they talked about baseball games and pizza toppings and made no sense at all. That's what lack of sleep will do to you. :D

Reviews are better than putting on a show.

Leave one.