A/N: I don't own this, we all know who does. If I did, Rpattz would have watched me trim my bangs this afternoon. He likes seeing me be all useful and stuff. It turns him on... :)

This is unbeta'd, so any and all mistakes belong to me. I'm in a rush, gotta get to the store before dinner time! :D

This is for my wifey, Mrs. Robward. We're making practically the same thing for dinner...thousands of miles apart...with no planning. We're so of the same brain half the time. :D

Thanks to Luxure & EdwardsBloodType for prereading this. The are both in possession of all chapters up to 54, and EBT has stated publicly on the FB secret group that she's accepting bribes for secrets. That girl... :D The things she won't do for good RobPorn. :D

**disclaimer **

This story is a bit taboo. Okay, this chapter ends in a VERY harsh place. I don't think I'll be able to get another one up tonight, SOOOOOOO, if you do NOT want to be sexually frustrated all night, DON'T read this until tomorrow, when the next chapter is posted. If, on the other hand, you like to feel the burn...the longing...the want and desire, read it. Then wait until tomorrow morning for the satisfaction you're craving. Really, I didn't want to post these on separate days, but that's how it's turning out. :) Don't say I didn't warn you... :)

(Aren't you glad you weren't reading this when it was posting? :D I was gonna take this warning out, but it's cute...I like it, so I left it in. :D )

~:O:~:O:~:O:~

… Chapter Forty One - Fire … Bella …

~:O:~:O:~:O:~

Sleep doesn't come easy, though I'm exhausted and completely euphoric.

I had heard about phone sex and on-line sex, but text sex...I never dreamed it could be as hot as it was. Maybe that's just because it was with you.

I had sex once after the divorce. A man I worked with, James, he was nice.

It had been so long. His attention felt good, kind.

He flirted, I laughed, he touched me. It didn't feel like it did when your fingers were on me.

It was quick, sweaty. I didn't want to remember much more. He flirted again afterward, trying for another round, but I refused.

He wasn't who I wanted.

Not who I needed.

I decided after him that unless I met someone that made me feel like you did, I would be alone.

I was okay with that. I had Claire.

Now my body is alive again, on fire.

Some people think that because I dance around practically naked, I have sex a lot, with anyone. That isn't true.

I turn off that part of my brain. I feel sexy when men are ogling me, as I dance, but otherwise, I'm a mom. Unseen. Invisible. Unwanted.

I'm okay with that. Unless it's you looking.

Claire is happy before school, bouncing with anticipation. Rehearsing stories of you all through breakfast.

She can't wait.

I try to study once she's gone, but it's hopeless. All I think about is you.

I shower, dress, make sure I smell pretty and nice. For you. I want this to be perfect, if you really do show up.

I want to make it worth the wait, live up to all the memories we've both been living on for the past six years.

I wonder about you, if you've slept with lots of other women. Will I be able to tell? Will you have tricks and techniques and positions I've never heard of? Will it break my heart to know you must have learned them somewhere? From someone?

It's a little after nine in the morning and I sit down, trying to think of something to do to pass the time.

My buzzer goes off, and I hit the speaker button, wondering who is looking for me.

"Bella?" you say, uncertain and lustful.

"Come up."

Just like the last time, I wait for you, door open, arms aching.

And then you're here, smiling bashfully as you walk toward me.

"They sent me home. I suddenly wasn't feeling well."

I see the blush on your cheeks, your neck. I want to lick it off of you.

Once you're inside, the door closed, I help you take off your suit jacket, hanging it by the door. You grab your tie, starting to loosen it, but I stop you.

Oh no, that's mine.

I realize what I'm wearing, and that it's not what I'd planned. Leaving you alone, telling you to wait, I hurry to my room. The blue satin and lace nightie I picked out is laying across my bed, and I pull off my shirt, letting the cool, smooth fabric of the lingerie take it's place.

My jeans fall to the floor, baby pink cotton boy shorts inside of them. There's no need for panties, though I have them. In every color imaginable.

They're just one less thing for you to take off.

I know I could dress up, be a sex kitten if I wanted to, but none of that feels real. That's for work, where I'm someone else. This...this is real. True.

I want it to feel that way for us.

I've waited for so long to love you like this again, to have you in my hands. I want it to be right.

When I turn around, coming back to you, I see you. Standing in the door way, your chest heaving as you breathe in and out. Your eyes are on me, raking up and down my body. I can see the desire radiating off your body. Your hands clenched in fists as you try to hold back.

It's useless. I want you with the same fierceness. The same ache. The same yearning.

And instantly it's eight years ago, the first time I saw you. Instantly, I'm a 16 year old girl again, longing for her first crush. Instantly, I forget every moment I've spent away from you, every night I've cried for you.

You're here, with me. And you want me like I want you. We have all day, and I have no idea where to start.

Aside from the fact that I need to have my lips on you.

Now.

~:O:~:O:~:O:~

A/N: See you tomorrow! :)

See, now you're wishing you'd read that disclaimer at the beginning of the chapter, huh? The warning about sexual frustration and not getting any relief until tomorrow. :) I didn't write it for my own amusement. :D

Reviews are better than pulling on ties.

Leave one.