Prompt:Hello there, I'm a huge fan of your writing! I was wondering if you could do one where Effie and haymitch's relationship has been discovered by the capitol and are forced to do an interview with Caesar, you can add as much hayffie you want!

I'm afraid this one went straight into crack pretty quickly. I had fun writing it though so I hope you enjoy it. It's not betaed and I'm sure there are plenty of mistakes but I can't see them anymore, I did my best to proofread, I hope it's readable. Have fun and let me know what you think!

Rumor Has It

"I am certain you will have better luck next year." Caesar concluded. "We certainly wish you the best!"

Effie accepted the host's good wishes with a bright smile and nodded at the polite clapping of the audience. Haymitch's shoulders sagged in relief now that the interview was at an end. He wasn't as drunk as he wanted to be and she knew just how much it cost him to put up an act for the cameras. Fortunately, the losing Districts interviews never took long.

Still, Effie waited pointedly for Caesar to thank them or to launch the next subject so they could leave, but the host was sitting on his chair opposing their couch and didn't seem in any hurry to release them. Eventually the audience stopped clapping, curious whispers rippled over the Capitol people attending the show and Effie tensed, sure that Caesar's grin wasn't a good omen.

"Can we address the rumors?" the host asked with a wink. "You can tell me in confidence, I'm very good at keeping secrets."

The audience laughed.

Haymitch obviously forced himself to relax and look casual.

Effie had to fight her body's instinctive reaction – which was to cringe.

"The rumors?" she repeated, tilting her head to the side in a completely clueless fashion.

"He means the rumors about you and me shagging against every closed door." Haymitch snorted, triggering another wave of laughs and delighted shocked gasp at his crudeness.

"Language, Haymitch." she chided him sternly. "You are on national TV not in one of your shady bars."

"How do you know the bars I go to are shady?" he retorted. "You wouldn't know fun if it bit you in the ass." His lips stretched into a smirk and he wriggled his eyebrows. "Now that's an idea."

She glared at him with all her worth before turning to Caesar once again. The host looked happy at least. The banter was what he expected of them, what the audience wanted from them, their volatile – and admittedly ridiculous – public bickering was Twelve's only saving grace. It was the only thing that made people interested in their District.

"I am afraid I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about." she told Caesar, a note of warning in her voice. That was going a tad too far for her, it was her reputation on the line and she would have liked to be prepared for that sort of ambush beforehand. She fully understood the interviews of losing mentors and escorts needed to be kept interesting because there was only so much you could say about their tributes getting killed but this was pushing it.

"Why, I am referring to the headlines of Capitol Weekly, Pop Icon, and The Official Hunger Games Gossip Magazine…" Caesar nodded at the screen behind them which lighted up with the mentioned covers featuring supposed stolen pictures of Haymitch and his escort. There was nothing incriminating on those pictures. Perhaps they were walking a little too closely but the only one that could have been misinterpreted was one that had been taken during the Opening Ceremony right at the moment Haymitch leaned in to whisper something in her ear so other people wouldn't hear – and even that was far-stretched.

"Lies, lies and more lies." Effie dismissed them with a graceful wave of her hand. "I wouldn't concern myself with those if I were you, Caesar, my lawyer is already suing them."

"So there is absolutely no truth to it?" the host insisted, eyes sparkling in mischief.

"None whatsoever." she said firmly.

"Haymitch?" Caesar replied. "What do you say to this?"

Effie shot him a warning glance. She had handled it, all he had to do was deny. However, she would trust Haymitch when pigs would fly by her window. And, as if to prove her right, his smirk only grew.

"I say it would never work." he shrugged.

Caesar sensed the potential for more amusement and went straight for it. "Why, you know the saying… Opposites attract. And I would say you and Effie certainly do not lack… tension, if you catch my drift."

The audience whooped and whistled. It was all Effie could do to purse her lips and look disapproving.

Haymitch lifted his hands only to let them fall in a fatalistic gesture. "She's too uptight."

"Loosen her up!" someone shouted from the audience and everybody laughed on stage as well as in the public – everyone except Effie, that was.

"Think she would let me?" Haymitch asked Caesar while Effie simmered in her anger and irritation and very much tried not to let it show. "Look at her. She already planned three way to kill me without getting caught."

Caesar chuckled at that but Effie was done being outstaged.

"Actually, you are underestimating me. I have four." she retorted before smiling sweetly at Caesar. "And Haymitch is right, it would never work. People should be equally attractive in a relationship or there will always be jealousy."

The audience liked that and clapped accordingly.

"Aw, don't sell yourself short, sweetheart." Haymitch cooed, faking sympathy. "I'm out of your league, sure, but you're not so bad."

The clapping turned to roaring laugher and Effie simply lost it.

"You are the rudest man I've ever had the displeasure to meet!" she hissed.

"To each their kinks." he winked, nodding at Caesar. "She ever told you she's had a crush on me ever since she was twelve?"

"Haymitch." she screeched. "This is… Not only is this untrue but you are not helping. Please, do give Caesar a formal denial."

So we can finally get out here was left unsaid.

He rolled his eyes. "I don't care. Let them think whatever they want. Last week, they were all talking about Brutus and Three's escort, next week maybe Caesar will be shagging Chaff. Everyone knows it's bullshit."

"Why, do you think Chaff would be interested?" Caesar asked, sounding hopeful only to amuse his audience.

Haymitch waved that question away, serious for once. "Point is, nothing's happening with Effie. She wishes but I'm not interested."

"I am not interested either." She gritted her teeth. "I don't like ruffians who lack basic manners. I have higher standards than that, thank you very much."

"Well, I think that concludes our interview." Caesar declared. "Effie, Haymitch, thank you very much. Ladies and Gentlemen, we will meet again after a short commercial break!"

The second the cameras were off, Effie narrowed her eyes at the host. "That was a trap and I am furious with you."

"It's only business, Effie. Nothing personal." Caesar shrugged with an impish smile. "Beside, you two handled it very well. That was a very good show."

"You bet it was." Haymitch scoffed. "Come on, Princess, there's a bottle with my name on it back at the penthouse and nobody wants to see you scream like a banshee."

She let him drag her away, still glaring at Caesar over her shoulder. Who needed enemies with friends like this? It wasn't until they were in the elevator that her anger found a new target.

"Did you really have to put up such a show?" she snapped.

"You know the drill just like me." he sighed. "The more you deny, the worst it will be. I'm attractive and you're you, people are always going to talk."

He was most likely teasing but she wasn't in the mood for it.

"You are passably attractive only because I dress you up." she huffed. "I am more attractive than you."

"Keep telling yourself that." he taunted.

"I understand why they would think you have a crush on me. Who wouldn't?" she continued, folding her arms over her chest. "But really! Who would believe for one moment I would reciprocate those feelings ?"

"Yeah, who?" he humored her, rolling his eyes. "'Cause it's not like you would squirm and beg if I pinned you to this wall and had my way with you right here, right? 'Cause you're so not interested."

She pursed her lips and tilted her head in disapproval. "This is a different matter entirely."

"How?" he snorted. "'Cause the paparazzi got it right for the first time in years but it hurts your precious image of perfect little Capitol lady? Get real, Effie, there are plenty of perfect little Capitol ladies who would drop their panties for me out there. It's not as far-stretched as you make it sound. I'm not Brutus or Finnick but I'm still a victor and that's a turn on for those women."

He didn't pin her against the wall but she did, pressing against his body and forcing him back until his hands grabbed her waist and a smirk appeared on his lips.

"Do you have any particular woman in mind?" she hissed.

The chime told them they had reached the penthouse but neither of them moved.

"Do I need to?" he challenged.

The kiss wasn't nice. It was all tongue and teeth and she bit his bottom lip with a possessive growl that turned into a gasp when he reversed their positions and she found herself squashed between the wall and his body. His mouth trailed down her throat, following a familiar path, while his hands slipped under her skirt.

"See, that's your problem…" he mocked between two kisses on her neck. "You want to pretend this isn't happening but you're going berserk if I so much as flirt with anyone else."

"Oh, and you don't do the same thing, perhaps?" she retorted.

He paused long enough to unzip her dress. "Maybe. But I don't care if everyone think I'm sleeping with you."

"Of course you don't. It won't hurt your reputation." she argued, nudging him inside the penthouse before the elevator doors could close – there were enough rumors flying around they didn't need to be caught doing that in public places on top of it.

"Depends with whom." he scorned and then shrugged. "Who cares. Let them talk." He pinned her against the corridor wall and lifted her up so she could wrap her legs around his waist. "Or you want to stop?"

That would be the logical and cautious thing to do, she mused, cool things down for while, wait for the Capitol to move on to the next rumor…

Instead, she rolled her eyes and kissed him deeply.

There were things that were worth seeing her reputation tarnished over.