Prompt: hi, could you please do another fic which addresses your headcanon that Effie's father doesnt always pay her 100% attention and that Effie thinks he prefers her sister. I love your fics about this :)

This is… cracky and little bit lame. I'm sorry.

Family Reunion

The huge ballroom in which the party was taking place was packed with people and Haymitch let out a pained sigh as soon as they had put a foot in it. The hand Effie had placed on his arm tightened to the point her nails were digging into his flesh – he sometimes thought it would have been righter to speak of claws.

"Do we still have an agreement ?" she asked with a fake beaming smile that was in total discrepancy with the predatory glint in her eyes.

"Yeah." he grumbled unhappily.

"Remind me of the terms." she insisted. She was too used to doing business not to be thorough and he had found too many loopholes in their agreements over the years for her not to be cautious.

"I behave, I don't get drunk, I help with sponsors." he droned out in a bored voice. "And in exchange you will do whatever I want for the rest of the night."

"Within limits." she nuanced.

His smirk was slow and he wriggled his eyebrows at her. "You never said anything about limits and I think I will put you to work as soon as we're back in the car, sweetheart. This mouth of yours…"

He had hoped to unsettle her but she was too used to his gibes and innuendoes, she didn't bat an eyelash. "I trust you to know what the limits are." She grinned and winked. "But a blow job in the car seems like an acceptable reward. Now, make sure you earn it."

She immediately steered him toward a group of sponsors without leaving him time to answer. That woman, he mused, would be the death of him. It was odd how you could loathe someone for some things and respect them for others, odd how he hated her and desired her all in the same breath…

A deal was a deal though and he was planning on taking full advantage of her offer so he forced the "charmer" smile on his lips and seconded her as best as he could in her hopeless quest for sponsors. People were polite for her sake and amused by his cavalier behavior but none of them consented to sponsoring them.

After an hour of forced smile and absurd discussions, Haymitch was very tempted to simply drop the deal and find a bottle. She had granted him a single glass of wine and it hadn't been anywhere strong enough to help him through the night.

"Another half hour and we will leave." she told him softly, probably noticing his growing frustration. There was a spark of regret in her eyes. "It was a long shot anyway. Our tributes are not appealing enough."

That was an understatement.

"Come on." he said, nudging her toward a familiar old Capitol lady and her equally old friends. "Let's try the cats lover."

Hemilia Fernard was known for being rich, sweet on older victors who reminded her of her youth, and a huge defender of the animal cause. She had sponsored Twelve in the past and if he could get past the hours long soliloquy about her cats, Haymitch knew there was always a chance to scrap some money out of her. It was never enough to make a difference but it was something, he supposed.

They were halfway to the potential sponsor when their path was blocked by a couple, a woman and a man whose faces were so full of plastic Haymitch wouldn't have dared crack a match near them for fear of seeing them melt. Worse than her companion, the woman seemed to have nothing natural left : the lips were artificially full, her facelift was so distinct her skin looked ready to tear, her breasts were too big for the rest of her – unnaturally – thin figure. The clownish make-up, the electric blue wig and the voluminous dress weren't helping matter. Haymitch didn't even try to hide his contempt.

The woman had conducted the very same sort of examination and didn't seemed to be pleased by what she saw in him. She wrinkled her nose and finally turned her eyes to Effie. "Please, Euphemia, do tell me he is not your date for this evening."

"Euphemia?" he repeated, confused. He even forgot to tell the woman to go fuck herself, too shocked – and delighted – by the unexpected discovery. It had crossed his mind once or twice that Effie might have been a shorter version of another name but he had never cared enough to ask. Euphemia though… He would never let her live this through.

"Effie, Mother." his escort cringed.

Haymitch's eyes widened and he took a second look at the couple only to find the man glaring at him.

"Effie is a common name, I do not see what his wrong with your birth name." the mother snapped. "It has a nice ring to it."

"Certainly." Effie surrendered. "I do apologize but we have an appointment and…"

"You never answered my question." her mother cut her off. "Where is your date?"

Haymitch didn't like at all the way the woman was talking to his escort. He opened his mouth to let her know just that when Effie's nails dug into his arm painfully. The message was clear : shut up and let me handle it.

"Haymitch is my date." Effie hissed.

At another time, in another place, he would have disputed the term.

"You know, I'm told it's rude not to introduce yourself." he scowled. "Never mind talking about people in front of them as if they can't hear."

"Haymitch, please." his escort whispered at once, looking around in obvious distress. "Why don't you join Chaff at the bar, yes? I will come and get you in a minute and we can leave. You kept your end of the bargain, I will keep mine. Just… give me a minute?"

He didn't like it but he would probably have complied – if only because she looked so desperate to get him away from her parents – if another woman hadn't appeared next to them with a man in tow.

"Effie!" the newcomer beamed.

"Lyssa, please, don't indulge your sister in that ridiculous whim of hers. Euphemia is a perfectly good name and does not need to be shortened." the mother sighed but with obvious fondness.

"Sorry, Mother!" Lyssa laughed, pressing a kiss to her father's cheek.

Haymitch couldn't help but notice the father hugged her briefly whereas he had showed no affectionate gesture toward Effie.

"Why, it's a family reunion." Lyssa's companion observed, outstretching his hand to him. "I'm Rufus. Lyssa's husband. It's always nice to meet a victor."

Haymitch knew that kind of Capitol men : rich, idle and very attentive to their wardrobe. Still, given the surrounding hostile mood, it was a relief to see someone who didn't seem about to jump at his throat so he shook his hand however briefly.

"I am terribly sorry but Haymitch and I have things to do." Effie tried again, pulling on his arm to drag him away, but before she could take one step her sister had placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Oh, wait until you hear our news!" Lyssa beamed. "Rufus has just been accepted as a junior Gamemaker! He will start next year, isn't it wonderful!"

Haymitch and Effie exchanged a look.

"My daughter will be a Gamemaker's wife!" Effie's mother squealed in delight. "How proud I am of you, Lyssandra! Aren't you proud, Tadius?"

"Extremely." her husband confirmed with a warm smile.

"I thought you were going into politics, Rufus?" Effie cut in coolly.

Annoyance flashed on the younger man's eyes and Haymitch didn't like one bit the gaze he gave Effie, it wasn't just irritation but a lingering lust that prompted Twelve's victor to stand that little bit closer to her. The man seemed to understand what was left unsaid because he grabbed his wife's hand and simply shrugged. "Politics wasn't for me."

"You had so many career prospects I lost count." Effie mocked, clearly taking advantage of the offered weakness.

"Rufus does not need a career. He has enough money to do without. It speaks to his credit that he would even consider working and he would certainly do so only for the Capitol's greatest glory." her mother snapped. "Do not be jealous, Euphemia, it is unbecoming."

"Why would she be jealous?" Haymitch chuckled. "She's better of as an escort than as a Gamemaker, prettier dresses and a lot more of partying."

Less blood on her hands, too.

"She means of me." Lyssa explained with an apologizing shrug. "Effie and I have been very competitive since our youth and…"

"Yeah, thing is, I don't see anything to be jealous about." he interrupted. Given the clicking noise their mother was doing with her tongue, he supposed he was being rude. "You're pretty, I will give you that, maybe prettier than she is – she's got better legs though – but you're what? A wife? A Gamemaker's wife? It's sad you're only something in relation to your husband. Effie's better than that. She's her own person. See, if anyone has to be jealous, I think it would be you."

"Haymitch!" Effie rebuked but he could tell at her voice that she was more pleased than annoyed.

"How rude!" her mother exclaimed. "How can you tolerate such a barbarian, Euphemia, it is beyond me! Make him apologize to your sister, now!"

"Maybe I'm a barbarian but you're a bitch." he told her plainly.

"Haymitch!" Effie hissed, whacking his arm in obvious irritation this time. "Manners. You can't talk to people like that!"

"Why? You've heard the way they talk to you?" he growled, looking at her family with open disgust.

"Cute." Rufus chuckled into his wife's ear. "I had heard District dogs were loyal to their owner…"

It was lucky Effie swiftly put herself between them, a hand firmly planted on his chest.

"You will cause a scene!" her mother hissed. "I forbid you all to cause a scene!"

"We are leaving." Effie declared, pushing on his chest until he walked away. He resisted for a few seconds. "Haymitch."

Their eyes locked in a struggle of will and then he turned and stalked out of the ballroom, not looking at the people staring at him with curiosity. She caught up with him in the hall as he was instructing a staff member to get their car. He didn't wait for her before striding outside, barely remembering to wave at the waiting crowd hoping to get a glimpse of a victor. She was better at faking happiness and she waved with a cheerful grin, the smile only disappearing once they were safely enclosed in the privacy of the car. She pushed a button and a dark glass separation slid up, separating them from the Avox driver.

"Don't bother screaming, I'm not in the mood to be lectured." he snapped, rummaging around the mini-bar for his favorite brand of liquor. His fingers had barely grazed the bottle when she grabbed the lapels of his shirt and pulled him forward. Her mouth crashed on his, the collision was almost painful but he instinctively kissed back. "Okay…" he managed to let out between two of her – frankly suffocating – kisses. "Not exactly the reaction I was expecting. Not that I'm complaining…"

"Don't call my mother a bitch ever again." she hissed, popping off the first buttons of his shirt and running a hand on his chest. "I'm very mad about that. Name-calling is never an acceptable solution."

"Ever heard of mixed signals, sweetheart?" he snorted, his fingers were on her leg for some reason, he brushed them higher and higher on her thigh and she didn't even protest.

"You called my mother a bitch." she repeated as if it explained everything. He would have taken it for a reproach if there hadn't been a small touch of awe in her voice. She dropped feather-like kisses on his neck and he started to understand that maybe her mother wasn't the kind of woman anyone ever stood up to and probably never for her in any case.

"She is a bitch." he growled. "And what's with the your sister is better than you bullshit anyway?"

"To be fair, she probably is." Effie whispered against his neck.

He drew back enough to see her properly. "You're not insecure. You're the least insecure woman I've ever met. You're so full of yourself it's a miracle you don't burst with self-esteem."

Effie was always confident, very rarely vulnerable. She disliked being seen as weak, she used her clothes and make-up the same way he used his alcohol : as a clutch, a weapon and a mask all rolled into one. He liked that about her.

"There are circumstances." she deflected, leaning to kiss him again.

He avoided it.

"'Shouldn't be." he said firmly. "You're a huge pain in the ass but you're smart, smocking hot and you have a good heart, and if your family can't see that then they're not worth your time."

They stared at each other for a few seconds. She was the first to look away, fighting to keep a pleased smile off her lips. "Careful, Haymitch… It almost sounds like you care about me."

"You missed the part about you being a huge pain in the ass?" he scoffed.

"Language." she chided him automatically. She glanced through the window and sighed. "We are almost at the Training Center. You should…" She waved at his half unbuttoned shirt, leaving the rest left unsaid.

He fixed his clothing, watching her smooth her dress and check her make-up. It was almost ridiculous how much he wanted her.

"You owe me the rest of the night, sweetheart." he reminded her with a smirk. "I'm going to take advantage of that."

He wouldn't have if she had truly been upset, he would have waited until the next day to collect his reward, but she didn't look really upset, just… annoyed.

She flashed him a dangerous grin. "I certainly hope so."