Prompt: ok Ellana, I prompt this: Haymitch and Effie going through some Panem version of Kamasutra (like a super kinky Capitol version) and being all like 'how can anyone find this hot?!' but then trying something and actually enjoying it, be it like bondage or anal or seriously absolutely whatever. I'm so ready for some smutty Hayffie crack. Like so ready.

Fair warning smut is a heavily discussed topic in here.

Also my hc are my own of course but I still stand by my opinions on hayffie sex ;)

Forbidden Books

Haymitch looked up when he heard footsteps but quickly went back to the book when he recognized the familiar sounds of his escort's heels on floorboards. He was lost in the huge maze that the shelves of the Presidential Mansion's library formed and he didn't make it easier for her by calling out. He let her look around and mutter under her breath instead.

It took her ten minutes to find him. To be fair, he was at the very end of the room, tucked between a wall and two shelves.

"I have been looking for you for half an hour." she hissed as soon as she saw him, automatically patting her pink wig to make sure it was still in place. "You are not supposed to wander around the Mansion unsupervised."

"What are they going to do?" he snorted. "Arrest me for checking out books?"

The library might be the only place in the mansion he liked and actually sought out at every party taking place on Snow's territory. Censure didn't apply to Presidents. There were more than one forbidden books in the room and Haymitch had never been shy about borrowing some of them by sneaking them out in his pocket.

"Only you would be willing to go to prison for dusty books." she commented, lips pursed in disdain.

He rolled his eyes. "Not so dusty. Look."

He showed her what he had been busy studying. The book was obviously new, in pristine conditions, and he shuddered to think what Snow was doing with something like that. He had taken it off the shelf entirely by chance and had flicked through the pages only to do a double-take when he spotted some of the pictures. Then he had started reading and he had been engrossed in it ever since.

"Oh, Haymitch!" she gasped, immediately trying to force the book shut, tossing frightful glances over her shoulder. "It is improper to show this sort of things to a lady! And in a public place too! Oh, really!"

"Cut the crap, we're alone." he mocked, nudging her calf with his foot. "Check it out."

She pouted but stopped screaming about compromised virtue to glance once more over her shoulder. Once she was absolutely certain no one else was roaming around the library, she took the book and studied the particular picture he had stopped on.

"That doesn't look very comfortable." she commented without batting an eyelash.

"Right?" he triumphed because that was what he had been thinking ever since he had found the book. "Crazy Capitol book of uncomfortable sex."

She pursed her lips in that way that meant she was fighting a smile, her eyes twinkling in amusement. She consulted the table of contents.

"There is a chapter about foreplay. I do hope you read that." she hummed innocently.

"I'm the king of foreplay." he grumbled.

She didn't answer and he snatched the book back from her, annoyed and slightly vexed, to flip to a particular chapter.

"Here." he taunted, shoving it back at her. "How to please a man. Now, maybe you should read that."

"Should I?" she retorted, more amused than irritated. "Why, darling… I never had any complains." She did take a look, skimming through the text and studying the illustrations that went with it. "Do you think I need help with blow jobs? You certainly never seemed unhappy with my methods before."

There were a few pages about that. What to do… How to do it… How to tease… How to use tongue… It was dirty. Some of it was dirtier than anything they had ever done.

"Never let me jerk off on your face." he pointed out. "Look, they say it's hot."

She waved that away. "You ejaculated on me before."

"Chest and body." he insisted. "Not your face."

"And you won't be doing it anytime soon." she declared with a tone of finality. "My face is out of bounds. You might find it very hot but I can promise you sperm in one's hair and eyes is nothing sexy. It is messy, sticky and honestly sometimes painful." He breathed out a sigh of pure disappointment but it was more for show than because he cared. He had just been looking for an angle. She kept perusing the chapter, sometimes reading entire paragraphs and he wondered if that meant she was looking for new tricks. She snorted when she found a new section. "Well, this is something we never tried."

He glanced over her shoulder and cringed. "Over my dead body."

"Now, now, Haymitch…" she sing-sang. "They say men love it."

"You're not touching my asshole." he spat. "And you're certainly not putting anything in it. Finger or… otherwise."

The simple picture of a dildo was enough to make him shudder.

"Anal play does not make you gay, you know." she teased. "I am still a woman. You would still be having sex with a woman. There is nothing wrong with enjoying every part of your body. I didn't think your masculinity was so easily threatened…"

"My masculinity is fine." he growled. "And I don't care about gay. Whatever rocks everyone's boat. I'm just not interested in that, okay?"

And, yeah, maybe he was a little spooked by the whole thing because he lived in the back hole of Panem where this sort of things was done behind closed doors but wasn't advertized. And maybe the prospect of someone invading him in that way, even her who he trusted, was more frightening than pleasurable. The lack of control only assured that it was never something he could do. Never mind the fact it really didn't attract him.

"You never even tried." she remarked. "How can you say you wouldn't enjoy it?"

"'Cause assholes are for pooping, not for sex." he scowled. "Look, I'm a simple guy. All I need for good sex is a hole to put it. And you've got a nice convenient one. Don't need anything shoved in me."

She wrinkled her nose.

"Must you be so vulgar?" she lamented.

He watched her carefully as she turned her attention back to the book.

"That's something you're into?" he asked. "Putting on strap-ons and fucking guys in the ass?"

She took her time before she answered.

"I tried strap-ons a couple of times." she admitted. "Once was with a woman, the usual way mind you, and… Yes, it was good. The other time was with a man and that wasn't so good. It takes practice, I suppose, otherwise it is awkward and more than a little painful. But the act of…" She stopped and gave a tiny shrug. "It is a turn on to feel you have the power." Her blue eyes passed on his face and she flashed him a smile. "Do not worry, I won't request that of you. Everyone has boundaries. It is fine."

He disliked it when she talked about sex like she was a great expert – although he figured compared to him, she was. She might have been younger but she had tried almost everything under the sun.

"You've ever tried it?" he asked, leaning against the shelf, curious despite himself. "Taking it in the ass?"

A flash of something clouded her eyes and he was immediately faced with the escort mask. Cheerful, bubbly, dumb…

"It is not something I am really into either." she answered and left it at that.

"Got hurt?" he growled, his chest puffing with the urge to… He wasn't sure what exactly… hurt whoever had caused her pain. It gave him pause. They were fuck-buddies, not… He wasn't supposed to feel protective of her.

"Not really." she reassured him, squeezing his wrist to appease him. "It just wasn't that good." Her voice became lighter when she reached the next chapter. "Ah, something else you won't like… Bondage."

"No." he said at once.

She chuckled, having obviously known it would be his reaction all along.

"You cannot say you haven't fantasized about me bound and gagged, awaiting your pleasure, I wouldn't believe you." she said but she was already flipping through the pages to the next chapter.

"Some fantasies should remain just that." he grumbled, briefly coiling his hand at the base of her neck and squeezing.

He didn't want her at his mercy. He was scared of what would happen if he was given free reign over her. He was scared he would lose it. He was scared he would give in to the darkness that had been looming inside him ever since his Games.

You didn't bait the monster within.

"BDSM." she read aloud. "We can skip that too."

You didn't let the monster out to play either.

He simply let out a grunt of agreement, using his grip on her nape to prompt her to tilt her head so he could nuzzle her neck. She smelt awfully good. She had a new perfume on, he thought.

"Ah." she grinned, gently elbowing him in the chest. "How to please a woman. Now, that is the chapter for you."

"Can please you just right." he countered, sliding his hand on her stomach and down her thigh. He slowly back her against the shelf but she didn't seem to notice, focused on the book as she was.

"Still, there are interesting things in there." she hummed as he pressed an open mouth kiss to her shoulder, poking her skin with his tongue. "Do not work yourself into a state, we are not having sex here."

She was too collected and it annoyed him. He snatched the book from her hands once more and checked out another part of that chapter he had been reading earlier, just to be sure. Then he tossed the book on the floor and dropped to his knees.

"Sure about that?" he challenged.

"Haymitch." she warned but she made no move to stop him when he disappeared under her dress.

"Try to keep quiet." he mocked.

He really hoped nobody had the idea of touring the library at that moment because the noises they both made were explicit enough that anyone would have known what was going on. Her muffled cry of pleasure and the way her legs gave in, for instance, were quite the incriminating evidence. She almost collapsed on him and that made him chuckle.

He sat next to her, with their back to the shelf, as she recovered. A few books were now scattered on the floor and she was panting heavily. He took hold of her arm and gently licked and kissed the bite mark she had left behind when she had sunk her teeth in her flesh to muffle her noises of pleasure.

"That was very, very good." she declared.

"Guess the book isn't all bullshit." he snorted.

She toed it closer to them with her heel and checked out the various positions part while still looking for breath.

"We could try a couple of those." she suggested. "I will order the book first thing tomorrow."

"Don't bother." he snorted. He picked it up and placed it in the inner pocket of his jacket, relocating the flask to the front pocket of his pants. It was a tight fit but it would do.

Her eyes widened when she realized what he was planning. "Absolutely not. We could become Avoxes for this. Theft, Haymitch. Theft."

"You think Snow checks this book every night?" he mocked. "Nobody will notice it's even gone."

"If we get caught…" she argued.

"Never been caught before." he smirked, wriggling his eyebrows. "Not even by you."

The look of horror on her face was almost comical.

"Do not tell me more." she hissed, scrambling to her feet. "I would be an accomplice." She fixed her clothing and her wig and cleared her throat. "I will order the car. Join me in the entrance hall."

"Bossy." he complained but it came out more fond than annoyed.

"I will show you bossy once we are back at the penthouse." she promised, disappearing between the shelves.

Now the evening was finally looking interesting.