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SO much love goes out to A Jasper For Me, Ffaddward, Livie79 and MsHavisham79 :')

Chapter Nineteen

After I was escorted out of Cain and Abel's - which was not in handcuffs, thank you very much - Bella suggested it was best if I went home with Emmett.

She also suggested I look into signing up for anger management classes, which I thought was a little overboard.

I didn't kill anyone. And it's not like I went around punching the shit out of people's faces for fun. It definitely wasn't a hobby of mine, but maybe it would become one if James didn't take a fucking hint.

"Maybe we should finish what we started in the bathroom..." I whispered in her ear as she hugged me goodbye.

"Such a romantic."

"With you, I am."

Bella pushed me towards Emmett's car and said, "Get some sleep, okay? Ice your jaw, and we'll talk tomorrow when I'm not busy studying."

"Tomorrow," I assured her. "Better text me back."

"Uh huh."

After much needed sleep, water, and Advil, I texted Bella around five in the evening thinking I had given her plenty of time to study.

E: come over

B: I'm studying

E: no ur not. ur texting

B: Edward.

E: I wanna see u

B: you always want to see me.

E: sue me.

B: did you already get your inheritance?

E: no...

B: then why would I sue you?

E: cute. come eat w/me.

B: studying.

E: you need to eat. grilled cheese?

B: if I come over for an hour, will you leave me alone for the rest of the weekend?

E: no. ur supposed to come with me to Esme's bbq on saturday to celebrate my job

B: you're lucky you have good hair. you're too needy.

E: come over & i'll make it worth ur while

Fifteen minutes later, there was a knock on Emmett's door.

"Ah. Surprise, surprise." I winked and let Bell in.

"I'm here for the grilled cheese," she lied. No fucking way she would wear that tiny of a skirt and that tight tank to only come over and eat grilled fucking cheese.

"Sure. Well, let's get to it."

Bella sauntered past me. In her tight jean skirt. I had to adjust the hard on I was getting, because cheese needed to be grilled.

"Where's Emmett?" she questioned.

"I have no idea. I haven't seen him since this morning."

"Your face looks a little better," she noted as she patted my cheek.

"Thanks?"

"Enough small talk. Grilled cheese me."

Laughing, I pulled her into me. "Bossy."

She scoffed as she wrapped her arms around my waist. "Starving."

"Well, since your last stint with the toast, I'm taking over. You sit your cute little ass in the living room, and I'll make your food," I instructed before kissing the side of her head. "Go!" I smacked her ass, for good measure.

Bella turned on the television, and I listened to the hushed murmurs of whatever show she was watching.

"I hope you don't mind the vegan, lactose-free cheese I have to use. Rose buys this shit, but it actually doesn't taste too bad."

Silence.

"If you really don't like it, maybe we have some peanut butter or something."

Still no answer.

"Bell?" I called out before walking out of the kitchen to find Bella passed out on the over-sized beanbag in the living room. No wonder; she was watching TMZ. That shit would put me to sleep, too.

I let her sleep because I figured she needed her rest, and assumed she'd only be out for thirty minutes.

Two hours later, Bella stirred awake on the beanbag. "Noooo," she mumbled, covering her face with her hand.

"Hey, you." I looked up from my laptop and smiled at her sleepy grin.

"Did you drug my grilled cheese?" she asked with a yawn.

"No. I mean, yeah. I drugged it. But you fell asleep before you could eat it, so I didn't get to take advantage of you." Bella laughed, keeping her eyes closed. "Not yet, anyway."

"Get over here."

"Are you hungry?" I asked quietly, lying next to her on the beanbag. "Because-"

"No. Not hungry..."

My fingers trailed over her stomach, then under her tight shirt. "You know how hard it was to watch you sleep over here without being able to touch you?"

"Mmm. No. I don't know."

I let my hand slide under her bra, taking her breast in my palm.

"Is Emmett here?" she randomly asked for the second time since she arrived.

"What the fuck?" I pulled my hand out from under her shirt, causing her eyes to fly open. "What- you're into Em now?"

Bella stared at me in bewilderment and said, "Uh, no. I was just making sure he wasn't here because I'm about to fuck you on the beanbag. Is that okay with you?"

"Oh."

She grinned. "Yeah. Oh."

"He got home an hour ago, and I'm pretty sure he's asleep. So, maybe..." my head nuzzled against her neck, "if you're quiet we won't wake him."

"Have you ever fucked on this beanbag before?" Bella whispered, tangling her fingers in my hair.

"Never."

"Good," she panted as my hand slid up and down her thigh.

"Good thing you're wearing a skirt, huh?"

"I come prepared," Bella winked, pulling on my neck to kiss me.

"Take this off," I growled, pulling her shirt over her head. She unhooked her bra; I cupped her breast, slightly pinching. "Hey, baby?"

"Hmm?"

"Touch yourself." My dick throbbed at the thought.

"Wha-"

"Come on...I want to watch you..." I coaxed as I bit her ear. Apparently that was all she needed because her hands flew to her waist, hand slipping in her underwear. "Fuck, that's so hot."

Bella moaned as she slipped two fingers inside. "You like this? You like watching me?"

"Fuck yeah," I hissed. "I bet you're so wet, baby."

She shuddered, biting her lip. "I am. I need you in me."

Fuck. That was so much better than her saying she wanted me. She fucking needed me.

I gently pulled her underwear down to her ankles as she unbuttoned her skirt, letting me slide that off as well.

"Do we need..." I hesitated.

"No. No. Just you. I just want you," she practically begged as she lifted my shirt over my head.

Frantically unbuttoning my jeans, I pulled those fuckers off, kicking them across the room, along with my boxers.

"You're kind of beautiful..." I whispered, feeling like a douche. Who says that shit? It was true though.

"Kind of?" she teased as I dropped to my knees and kissed the inside of her thigh.

"No," I hummed against her skin. "You're really fucking beautiful."

Bella gazed down at me with some sort of...lust in her eyes. No, I had seen lust before. That so wasn't fucking it.

"Hey..." I kissed my way up her stomach, hovering over her on the beanbag.

"You..." she started as I slowly pushed into her. "Shit...it's..."

"...so fucking good," I growled.

She closed her eyes, and I just...fell in fucking love or something. Because it was just us.

Just Bell and me.

My feet were sliding on the carpet, but that didn't slow my pace as she dug her nails into my back, then my neck.

"Wrap your ankles around me, Baby."

She did, and fuck, I pushed deeper; all of me. And I wanted to fucking cry at how warm and wet and fucking good she felt.

I pushed the hair out of her face, trying to distract myself. I was about to fucking lose it, but I needed to wait for her.

"This beanbag..." I grunted, a light laugh escaping from her lips, "...is awesome."

"Your dick," she writhed underneath me. "Oh my...fuck."

"Bell...I don't- I can't."

"Al...most," she moaned. "Ugh, it's- I'm-"

She started moaning my name, so fucking loud, I had to put my hand over her mouth to quiet her. She bit down on it, only causing my dick to twitch even more.

I felt her walls constricting against my dick, so I thrust faster and kissed harder until we both came.

And then I just laid there on top of her, catching my breath. Because-

"Holy shit."

Those were her words; my thoughts exactly.

"I know," I chuckled. "I know."

Bella caught her breath, then lost it again as I pulled out of her.

I rolled next to her on the beanbag and ran my hands over my face.

"You're kind of amazing," she admitted quietly.

"This is a first. Go on..." I teased, pulling her lips to mine.

"I guess I just...I'm shocked. That's all." Bella smiled against my lips, playing with a piece of hair that fell into my eye. "You're different, in a way. But you're the same. It's good. I think we're good."

"You realize you pretty much just admitted you love me, right?" I asked playfully, knowing she was about to go all crazy eyes on me.

"What?" She non-crazy eyed me for a second, still calm. "No, I didn't. I was just saying that-"

"It's okay, Bella," I hummed, using a soothing tone. But really, I was trying my hardest not to fucking laugh at her expression. "It was only a matter of time. How could you expect to not fall in love with me?"

"Oh," she paused, looking thoughtful. "Only a matter of time, of course."

"I'm surprised you lasted this long, Bell."

"Because you're so charming, right? You definitely have a way with words. And you're absolutely not cocky whatsoever."

I had a feeling she was teasing me. So, I'd tease her.

"Well, you're wrong about that last part..." I smirked, glancing down at my lap.

Unfortunately, Bella didn't feel like sharing the couch, or beanbag, with me; she went home claiming she had taken a long enough break from studying. I let her know she was welcome here anytime she needed a break. That fuckin' girl...

The next morning, I texted her to let her know I still had her underwear. Oh, and I'd leave her alone to study for the day if she so graciously accompanied me to Carlisle and Esme's the following day. Yeah, I snorted at that shit, too.

She said yes, of course, but I had a feeling it was only so she could get her underwear back.

Bella and I drove over with Emmett to the barbeque the next afternoon. Rose was meeting us there, and I wasn't sure how Bella was going to react around her.

After a quick swim, the six of us were gathered on the back porch, drinking and watching Carlisle grill.

"We just can't get over how proud we are, Edward," Esme gushed for the tenth time today.

"Yeah, yeah," I muttered as Bella walked over to sit in my lap.

"And you two," Esme sighed in delight. "Precious. Just precious."

"Are you okay?" Bella whispered so no one could hear.

I wasn't so sure. Yeah, I was having a great fucking time, finally had a job, had Bella, and now...I'd get my money. I should've been ecstatic. But I wasn't.

My aunt and uncle had spent all day telling me how proud they were of me but...something felt off. Something wasn't right.

And it was sitting in my lap.

I knew I loved Bella, but...something that felt like guilt was making me feel sick for lying to Carlisle and Esme about Bella. And, maybe if I loved her enough, I should come clean.

Or not. I didn't have to say anything at all.

Did I?

"Honey, if you want to take the chicken inside, I'll finish up the steak," Carlisle said, kissing Esme's temple.

"Makin' her do all the hard work. Give the lady a break," Emmett sighed loudly, grabbing the pan of chicken from Carlisle.

"Thank you," Esme hummed. "Girls, come help me prepare the salad?"

Waving at Bella, I mouthed I'd meet her inside. She stared at me in confusion, but followed Em, Rose and Esme inside.

I was pretty sure Bella would no longer accept the money from me. So, maybe if I came clean to Carlisle, he wouldn't be as upset. And...here goes.

"Hey, C?" I asked, listening to the steak sizzling on the grill. I was pretty sure Carlisle had never grilled a day in his life, and I almost asked if they had fired their chef, Laurent, but thought better of it. "Can we talk for a sec-"

"Congratulations on your new job, Edward," Carlisle expressed as he cut me off. He almost looked and sounded proud...or something. It was obviously a new fucking color on him - at least regarding me - so it was hard to put my finger on it.

Rose's words echoed in my head after his words of congratulations. "New implies I had an old job," I snorted.

"Well, regardless of the circumstances," he commented as he focused on the grill in front of him. "Esme and I are very proud of the man you're becoming."

"Yeah, you mentioned that earlier..." I rubbed the back of my neck, willing myself to keep my mouth shut.

But the guilt wouldn't fucking go away.

Carlisle smiled and just had to add, "Your parents would be proud of you."

I could keep my mouth shut. No problem.

I swallowed and stared at Bella through the kitchen window, her carefree laughter causing me to smile. "Thanks."

"I'm serious, Edward. For a while - after some of the stunts you pulled - I wasn't sure things were going to fall into place for you," Carlisle snickered, but it was good-natured.

"God...dammit..." I said lamely, dropping my head.

Carlisle stared at me in shock and asked what was wrong.

"I don't think you're going to like what I'm about to tell you," I admitted.

Carlisle followed my gaze, eyes landing on Bella. "Well? What is it, Edward?"

"I...did you fire Laurent?"

Frowning, Carlisle gave me a weird chuckle and said, "No."

"That's good. Yeah." I set my hands on my hips, pretending like that was the best fucking news I had heard all day. I could give a fuck less about Laurent. "Awesome. It's so hard to get a job nowadays; I'd hate to think of Laurent living on the streets, or..."

"Was there something else you wanted to tell me?"

Opening my mouth, I winced and...well, I lied. "No."

"Then do you mind grabbing that pan and helping me carry this food in?"

Nodding, I watched in a daze as Carlisle grabbed a pair of tongs and set the steaks on the pan I held. Carlisle shut the grill and grabbed the pan from my hands before turning to head inside.

"Bella and I aren't really dating," I blurted out. Because now or never, right? Right. "Or, we are but...we weren't. Not at first."

Carlisle paused in place before slowly turning to face me. "What exactly does that mean? You two spend a lot of time together to not be considered dating."

"It means...shit."

"Use your words."

"It means Emmett told me about our inheritance money. It means...he told me about the conditions, and I knew I wouldn't find a relationship. I knew I wouldn't...you know, be able to stand being around anyone for a decent amount of time. So, I offered to pay Bella to date me."

Carlisle shook his head for a second; I stood there, sun beating down on my face, and waited for him to yell. But he didn't.

"I'm not sure I understand what you're saying."

"The conditions," I said in exasperation. "For Emmett and I to get our inheritance money."

"Yes. I caught that part, but I'm not sure what any of that has to do with you paying Bella."

Okay, I guess I could fucking repeat myself...for the third time...and if that didn't work, I could spell it out for him.

"The condition of needing to be married or in a serious relationship. Emmett has Rose; I was all fucking forever alone, famous ladies man...so...I told her I'd pay her if she dated me for a while, just to appease you and Esme."

Carlisle set the pan down on the brick counter next to the grill. "I'm slightly worried at what you're implying, but I have to first tell you, there was no such condition."

"Huh?"

"The only stipulation was you and your brother graduate college. Your parents didn't want you to depend on the money; they wanted you both to have something worth while to fall back on; to not become spoiled and unappreciative," Carlisle explained, eying me as if I had lost my mind. "I'm not sure what this condition about being married or...in a relationship is, but if you explain further, maybe we can figure it out."

Mother fucking Emmett.

I'm pretty sure fire blew out my nose. Or my ass. Or...just, some form of heat took over my body, because I was livid.

"Emmett. He's dead," I chucked darkly, staring at the group of people surrounding the kitchen table inside. "He's dead!"

Jogging towards the house, I leaped up the steps and burst through the sliding doors.

"You motherfucker."

Emmett greeted me with a smile. "Carlisle burned the steaks, didn't he? I told you he'd burn at least two steaks," he nudged Bella with his arm, and I slapped it away.

Yeah, it looked as ridiculous as it sounded.

"You lied to me!" I spat. "You fucking lied to me, and...and I had to pretend to be in a relationship! I had to lie to Carlisle and Esme. I had to...fuck!"

Bella's smile faded when she realized I wasn't joking around. In fact, everyone looked a little...uncomfortable at my outburst.

Including Emmett. Especially Emmett.

Carlisle finally walked in, steaks in hand, and watched the show.

Yeah, let's just all sit around and watch the spectacle that is Edward's life! Watch everything I've worked for go down the fucking drain.

"Yeah. Yeah. You know, I'm just chillin' outside with my uncle, and I decide to come clean about pretending to date Bella and offering to pay her money." I kept talking, ignoring Esme's confused 'what in the world?'s and 'Bella? Bella what is he talking about?'s. "Imagine my surprise when C looks at me like I am insane. And I'm a pretty level guy, Em. I don't easily lose my shit."

"Says the guy who got into a bar fight three nights ago," Rose snickered.

I flipped her off. Esme gasped. I wasn't sure why; it's not like she thought I was a fucking saint or anything.

"Carlisle said the only stipulation was we graduate college," I remarked calmly, because Emmett still had yet to speak and maybe this whole thing was a big misunderstanding. "Is that true?"

"Yes," Emmett replied, never faltering. "It's true."

"For fuck's...sake."

"Edward." Bella suddenly snapped. "Isn't that enough? You're overreacting."

"Overreacting?" I screamed. "No, no, no. Do you have any idea what I've been through these past few months? Thinking I had to...and then you! And it was all fake, but-" My breath became labored as I took in the stares of my family. And Bella. Oh, God. Bella.

Each of their faces held something different:

Disappointment.

Confusion.

Shock.

Pity.

Pain.

The latter was the worst, and it was clear as day on Bella's face.

Shit.

Bella stared down in her lap and said as quietly as possible, "I think I'm ready to go home now."

Esme began wailing about whatever the fuck, Carlisle regarded me with heavy eyes, and Bella stood to leave. Because I had fucked up. Again.

"You don't have to leave," I said quickly, grabbing her arm, only to have her pull away.

"I think," she hissed, "you made your point. I'm ready to leave."

"Bella..." Emmett said this time. "He's a fucking moron. Take it with a grain of salt, okay?"

"Not helping," I muttered as she stalked out of the room.

"Edward. Go after her," Esme instructed without looking me in the eyes.

Shaking my head, Emmett handed me the keys; I walked outside to find Bella leaning against his car.

She avoided my gaze as I unlocked and attempted to open her door. "I got it!" she snapped, opening the door herself.

Slowly walking around the car, I took a deep breath and held it until I was inside the car.

"You have to understand..." I whispered, releasing my breath and staring straight ahead.

"Start the car."

I shook my head. "Not until you talk to me."

"If you won't take me home, I'll get Emmett to." Bella began to open the passenger side door. So I leaned over and slammed it shut, because hell if I was going to let her walk away from me without letting me first explain.

"I'm not in the mood to talk about this! You've already said what you had to say in there. I get it, okay?"

She reached for the keys, so I stuck them in my pants. "You don't get it though."

"I have ears. It's fine. You found out you didn't actually have to pretend to date me and...it's normal for you to be upset."

"I'm upset with Emmett! I'm not fucking upset I met you, okay? I don't regret that. Don't you think I'm entitled to be a little caught off guard with this new information?"

Bella shrugged before pulling the seat belt across her chest. "I think we want different things."

"Oh, really? Please, do tell me what it is you think I want? Cause I'm pretty fucking sure it's you," I declared, causing her to snort. "Even before I realized it; it's always been you."

"Edward, stop. Please? I shouldn't have come here today anyway. I should've been studying."

Grabbing her chin, I forced her to look at me. "Can you look at this from my point of view for a second?"

"Sure." Bella pulled away and turned in her seat to face me. "You needed me to help you get your inheritance. We pretended to date. You got to fuck me without any expectations. Emmett lied to you, for whatever reason, and now you're free." Her tone was as cold as her eyes. "I think that sums it up."

"Will you please shut the fuck up?" I hissed, because she really needed to stop saying shit like that. "You know that's not true."

"Don't talk to me like that!"

"I said please. And, dammit Bella, I'm the one who did have expectations. You're the one who still won't admit you're in love with me."

"Excuse me for not wanting to get hurt. Every time we hang out, you somehow remind me of who I'm dealing with here."

"The other night, at Emmett's, you said I changed. You fucking...you know I've changed."

"I also said you're the same," she whispered, almost defeated.

"I can't completely change, Bella," I admitted, grabbing the back of her neck. "I can't change, and I can't stop my feelings for you."

"Take me home."

"You-"

Bell cut me off, never looking in my eyes. "Give me a week to finish my finals, and then we can figure this out, okay? Start your new job on Monday. Do your thing. I just...can't right now. I need space."

I started the car and drove her home, trying to ignore the way she discreetly tried to wipe her eyes.

"You don't have to hide from me," I spoke softly before she exited the car, slamming the door.

I had a feeling it'd be the longest week of my life.

A/N: ...Hi. Don't shoot the writer. It's all Emmett's fault, anyway. I vote for more beanbag time; that would help clear things up. Thanks for reading!