Prompt: If you would be so kind, here's a prompt: In THG Peeta accidentally saw Effie (mostly) naked. At that point she was just a hot stranger, so fantasy material for the teenaged boy. Over time she drifts into the mum-category. And now post-MJ he can't stop thinking about it because the idea that he ever thought of her like that weirds him out. So at family dinner he blurts „Real or not real: I saw you naked." Can you say awkward. Please and thank you !

Of Trends, Jealousy & Lingerie Magazines

"As usual, you're blowing this out of proportions." Haymitch scoffed, stabbing a carrot and sparing Effie a glare over the table. "Are you ever gonna get tired of the fucking theatrics?"

Effie glared right back and took a sip of the insipid red wine that was the most common in Twelve. "That woman threw herself at you."

He rolled his eyes. "Hardly."

To her right, Katniss let out an annoyed sigh and met Peeta's eyes, in a silent debate of sort. The boy had been very quiet since dinner had started, probably because Effie and Haymitch had already been arguing by that point. They had been arguing since they had come back from the market that afternoon and through Haymitch chopping vegetables for that night's roast.

"What does it matter?" the girl cut in, clearly fed up with that line of conversation. "Look, even if Haymitch finds a girlfriend, it doesn't mean he's going to kick you out. And if he does, you know you can crash at our house anyway so… What does it matter?"

It was Effie's turn to meet Haymitch's eyes in a purposeful manner but he averted his gaze after a few seconds and she pursed her lips, getting more and more annoyed by the second. She was used to Katniss being clueless but there were times when it grated on her nerves far more than others and right now was one of those. Peeta, she suspected, was far less oblivious than his girlfriend.

Of course, Katniss wasn't entirely to blame. Effie's things were still in the guest room after all and she still occasionally slept in there… They never kissed in front of the children or touched or did anything that could imply that they were… more than just two friends sharing a house. The fact that Effie had come to Twelve because she was lacking choices and couldn't bear to stay in the city any longer didn't hint at a committed relationship either.

But then again. They were not in a committed relationship as that afternoon had clearly proven.

"It is a matter of principle." she huffed, cutting her piece of roast in smaller pieces. Too small if Haymitch's pointed gaze was anything to judge by. He knew all her tricks and he would make a fuss if she didn't eat her whole share. Her plate was already not as full as the others', she was still struggling to gain weight after her stay in the Capitol cells. "Now, you know me, I would never speak ill of another woman…" There were guffaws all around the table that she chose to ignore. "But truly that dress was too short. Why, I understand the war was some sort of… liberation to some people in terms of fashion but truly that dress was too short. Was it even a dress? Why, it looked like a tunic… Perhaps she did not know better and forgot the pants that went with it… She was not even that good-looking, was she, poor thing?"

The question was directed at Haymitch with a note of viciousness that he knew better than to ignore. For a second, she thought he would challenge her, just for the sake of it, but he must have realized she really was irritated because he wisely took a sip of his glass and let that last remark pass unaddressed.

"When did you become a prude, sweetheart?" he teased. "I remember you wearing much shorter stuff than that woman was…"

She sniffed in disdain and ate a forkful of roast. "I doubt it."

"Oh, come on…" he snorted and his voice went low like it sometimes did when they were curled up in bed after sex and he was teasing her. It was intimate, private even, and the use of that tone in front of the children threw her a little. She glanced at them but Katniss still looked aggravated and Peeta still looked determined to be left out of that conversation. Haymitch brought his glass to his lips, toasting her on the way up. "What about that year when it was all about lace? You walked around in see-through dresses all the time. Good times…"

"It was never indecent." she argued.

He chuckled. "The only Capitol trend I ever got behind." His lips stretched into a slow smirk. "Literally."

She could feel her blush run all the way down her throat. Worse, his grey eyes followed it all the way down to her cleavage.

"Can we talk about something else?" Peeta quickly requested with a small wince.

"Yes, please." Katniss scowled – but not for the same reasons, probably.

"As soon as Haymitch admits I never walked around half naked like that ugly looking woman who made such an open pass at him this afternoon." she retorted without missing a beat.

She might have been laying it a bit thick with the woman references but Haymitch could be very thick himself sometimes and she wanted him to understand the message.

"You modeled lingerie."

The scoff didn't come from where she had expected it and she stared at Peeta, a little shocked by that outburst. She wasn't the only one staring. Haymitch had frozen, the fork halfway to his open mouth, and Katniss was frowning at him.

Peeta flushed crimson, cleared his throat and finished what was left of his vegetables in the most awkward silence.

Surprisingly and perhaps unfortunately, it was Katniss who spoke first. "How do you know Effie modeled lingerie?"

"A very good question, boy." Haymitch muttered, his tone far too neutral.

"The roast was excellent, Haymitch. Are we all finished?" Effie quickly hummed, hoping to avoid further embarrassment for anyone. That hadn't been her aim at all. "How about we move on to dessert? That pie looks absolutely delicious, Peeta…"

"Not so fast." Haymitch grumbled, raising a hand before the boy could jump on his feet to help her clear the table. He lifted his eyebrows in Effie's direction and pointedly looked back down at her half-empty plate. The children didn't make any comment when she started tucking in again with an infuriated sigh. They knew better. They all had their own problems. "So, kid… What was that about lingerie?"

"Leave him alone, Haymitch." Effie snapped.

"Just curious." he replied.

Peeta sighed and looked up at him, making a face. "I found a magazine the first night we spent at the Center. Effie was in there."

"You did lingerie magazines and you left them lying around the penthouse?" Katniss asked with a small frown.

That made her sound like a nymphomaniac. Effie opened her mouth to answer and closed it again because she didn't have a very good explanation. She had usually left those magazines lying around where she had known for a fact Haymitch would find them first – she was a bit stunned to find out he hadn't been the one to put his hands on that one – because she had known even then he had a collection of them. Her lingerie magazines had had a nasty tendency to disappear every year ever since she had become an escort. And now, she knew why for sure, they were neatly stacked at the bottom of Haymitch's wardrobe, hidden away under old shirts. When she had figured it out, she had started making it a game, both because she liked the thought of him touching himself looking at her pictures and so he wouldn't forget her during those long winters when he wasn't desperate enough to come to the city for the Tour.

"It was mine actually." Haymitch offered unexpectedly. "Wondered where it had gotten to."

Katniss' frown turned into a small sulk that was directed back at her boyfriend. "You kept it?" Peeta's answer was unintelligible and Katniss wasn't satisfied with it. "Why?"

The poor boy was very red in the face and didn't seem to know where to look. In the end, he pleadingly met Effie's eyes. "I didn't really know you yet!"

Well. Now he wasn't the only one blushing.

"It is perfectly fine, darling." she promised.

Haymitch didn't seem to think it was perfectly fine but he also seemed to take pity on the boy who couldn't have known, at the time, he would come to think of her as a second mother.

"You know… Maybe she was hitting on me…" he said, bringing back the conversation on the woman at the market. "Guess I still have game…"

Effie rolled her eyes. "Please."

"You're just jealous 'cause nobody flirted with you today." he mocked and then scowled a little. "For a change."

That last part was muttered but everyone heard it loud and clear.

They kept on bickering until he was satisfied she had eaten enough and they shared the pie Peeta had baked, finally letting Katniss change the topic.

Effie was still doing the dishes when the children said their goodbyes to go back to their own house. Haymitch wordlessly grabbed a dishcloth and started drying the plates she was washing – without being asked, which was a first.

"That was awkward." she commented.

"To know the boy jerked off to half naked pictures of you his first night in the penthouse? You think?" he snorted and, at her disapproving clucking, he shrugged. "Hey, I ain't blaming him… If you'd been my escort when I was sixteen and I'd found pictures of you… I'd have done it too." He smirked at her. "Hell, I'm still doing it…"

She rolled her eyes, her lips stretching into a smile despite her best intentions when he pressed a few kisses on her shoulder, over her sweater. Of course, he didn't stop there and his mouth slowly made its way up to her neck.

"You are not off the hook." she rebuked, shrugging him off. "That woman was all over you."

He sighed and it was a deep genuine sigh this time, not just because she was irritating her or disturbing his peace, but because he was honestly short of arguments. "She wasn't." She tossed him a look and opened her mouth to state her point again but he waved his hand in the air. "If she was, I didn't notice. And what did you even want me to say anyway? That I was spoken for?"

"For instance." she snapped before she could help herself. There was an odd sort of tension in the air now and she lowered her eyes to the sink full of soap water. His stare was burning a hole into the side of her neck. "I know we did not… acknowledge anything but… At some point… At some point I am going to need you to make a choice, Haymitch, because… It cannot be like before. I cannot be like before. Either this means something or it does not and if it does not…"

"You know it does." he said quickly, as if he was afraid she would pack up and run that very night.

"Then why are we still keeping it a secret?" she challenged, looking up at him. It required a lot of bravery to do so. They never talked about them. It was taboo. Denied. Hidden.

"We've never been really good at keeping it secret." he snorted and she saw it for what it was: a way to gain time before he truly had to face the question. He had a point, she supposed. Most people had figured it out eventually. Some victors, Portia, even Peeta she was sure.

"Haymitch…" she whispered.

"I wanna say it's dangerous." His jaw was clenched and his head was turned away from her. "But it ain't anymore, yeah?"

"No. It isn't." she confirmed softly.

He took a deep breath and looked back at her.

"Okay." he offered. "Alright. Next time some woman is a little too friendly I'm just gonna say my girl is the jealous kind, then. Yeah?"

Those two words, my girl, made her want to cry. She had never been his girl. His girl had been dead and buried for decades, her place in his heart guarded and defended. That he would call her that…

"I am not jealous." she denied, quickly blinking to chase the inopportune tears. He wouldn't appreciate her being too emotional. "I am simply possessive."

"If that's what you want to call it…" he chuckled, leaning down to press a kiss against her lips.