authorsnote: I am posting this at almost 5am, have not slept, am very sleepy but was determined to get this up. don't say I don't love y'all
apologies this is so delayed, took me a lil while to figure this one out, but the next chapter is already flowing nicely and will be up much sooner!
as always do lemme know your thoughts, reviews give me a big ole' smile, fav/follow for updates, and most importantly enjoy!
also, I just updated my WIP Winter is Here (yes this is a plug), a fix-it, stark, jon-centric fic. if you like this story, you'll like that one, trust me and check it out
songrecs: hit me where it hurts - caroline polacheck
Part of Jon hoped that once he'd reached the Tower it would be obvious. Though he felt better physically, he was annoyed, annoyed that nothing seemed straight forward anymore.
In his past life there had been the scheming and politics of the Wall yes, but people had spoken plainly, conspiracies and plots that been there yes, but easy to decipher, or at least manageable to decode, easier to see plainly.
In fact, he couldn't believe he hadn't predicted his own death. He could see it now as he thought back to his actions before he had died; he stood by what he had done, the Wildlings had to pass the Wall, but he could see why his other actions, sending brothers to man derelict castles, pledging to Stannis, breaking tradition; he could now see that what had happened to him, he should have seen coming.
He didn't regret his actions whilst he had been Lord Commander, no, but he should have seen what was coming, should have prepared against it.
He couldn't ever make the same mistakes again and miss something of that scale.
Here though everything was cryptic. The book was cryptic, giving hints and tips yes, but always veiled in a language that suggested more to everything it was saying. He also thought back to some quests and perks, the words used;
'Be wary though, the man who spends too much time in the past may fall into it completely'
'This determination to decide your own fate is brave, and yet may sometimes lead you to trouble'
'Just remember thinking too far ahead may have you missing the events passing you by right now!'
Cryptic. Why couldn't it speak plainly? Why couldn't it be simple? He had no time for riddles, hadn't in his past life and had even less time for them now.
And so, when he reached the Tower, he wasn't really sure what he wanted. He knew Bran was pushed, what did he hope for? The culprit stood beneath the Tower; arms bound ready to confess? A big piece of parchment with the words 'Plan to push Bran by...' Well nothing quite that obvious perhaps, but he hopes for something.
First he checked at the base of the tower. He could see a few dislodged rocks: no doubt from Bran climbing, and a puddle of water with some smears of blood – he was pleased to see someone had been out to try and clear it up but he could still see smears of red against the stone. His blood and Bran's mixed.
Stark blood, it looked the same, though he could swear different at the same time. Foolish really, blood couldn't be different (Targaryen's different as they had been had still been human), and so he shook that thought away and moved on, as the base of the Tower offered nothing.
He did pause for a second almost transfixed, blood … did it make him different? Was he different to his family because of blood, despite being raised a Stark?
The harsh squawk of a crow overheard snapped him back to reality and he decided to leave that question for another day.
He took a few minutes to look at the wall of the Tower. He could easily trace the route Bran had taken, it was the same route he'd take himself, and with a shrug he decided to do just that, Bran had come this way, it made sense to copy that, to see if it revealed anything.
Shockingly, it didn't.
All he got for his trouble was a cut on his hand and a slightly sore arm from where he'd overextended. The climb up (and through the window), revealed nothing, nor did the climb back down (other than another cut on his arm).
He looked around the back of the tower, to see if anything was dislodged there, and again nothing. He even looked up at the tower for a while, just to see if there was anything hanging down or that could have caused a fall.
Nothing.
And so, the next step it seemed would be to go inside.
He noticed the door was slightly ajar as he approached it, when usually it would be closed shut. That didn't tell him anything new though, there was only one entrance to the Tower after all, except for the window, and he doubted whoever had pushed Bran had climbed it.
On his way up the stairs again he saw nothing, no indication anyone had been there, except he supposed the fact the path was clear, leaves kicked aside, a spider's web disrupted. He wondered for a minute why the Tower had never been restored, it was a good piece of architecture. Why had it been left broken?
Well that was the North, underdeveloped. He supposed because there was little need to structure everything with no wars for over 10 years. Still, knowing what he knew Jon found himself frowning. The North had rested on it's laurels a little bit, had taken a sit back in peacetime. Jon would have to change that, like so many other things.
He was surprised then to feel the book heat, what had he triggered?
War Time (Perk!)
You are always ready for war and thinking of the fight! Such preparedness is good but try to enjoy peacetime too or the stress may send you to an early grave! +5 Strategy, +5 Tactics.
Hmm, minor but useful. He was finding that more and more with Perks, they were a lot smaller in their rewards, but he was picking up plenty of them.
As he reached the circular room of the tower, he began to thoroughly check each corner of the room, and there was again nothing. No scraps of cloth, no clandestine notes, no objects. Nothing. It was utterly devoid of evidence. He didn't even suspect someone had swept it, there had just been nothing left behind. He could see some blonde and brown hairs but that told him nothing of use.
With a sigh of frustration, he did another sweep, checking the windowsill where no doubt Bran had been pushed, but other than dislodged rock there was nothing there. He swept aside piles of hay to check underneath, checked the room three times before he gave it up with a sigh.
Of course, he suspected and even really knew who had done this. No doubt the Lannister's were responsible, but he couldn't accuse them without evidence. He supposed he just had to hope the assassination on Bran he would attempt to thwart (and he was determined he would be successful, in full this time), would reveal something more.
He hadn't' had a quest through for that yet but he just hoped it gave him some more warning this time, though he doubted it. As useful as the book was it certainly didn't feel he needed much time and kept the deadlines tight on timed quests. He wasn't sure to be flattered by its belief in him or annoyed at it for giving him so little time.
He did feel it warm then and saw the book glow and reveal the outcome of his quest
Quest Alert!
Fall or Push?
Investigate Brandon Stark's fall at the location it happened.
Reward: You'll be one step closer to understanding what happened to your brother. +200XP, +5 Stealth.
Current XP: 1700/2000 XP, Stealth: +5 = 20
He was surprised to see he'd passed that. He supposed it said 'investigate' not 'find' and so maybe he had passed it by just ruling something out? He certainly didn't understand how he was one step closer to finding out what happened. Perhaps the absence of evidence helped somehow? He wasn't convinced.
Still, he'd take it and was pleased to see he was close to levelling up again. Going South soon … he needed any help he could get.
With a sigh he made his way to the door then, closed his book and cast one last look around the Broken Tower. The mystery of his brothers fall remained … in a sense, but he would get to the bottom of it, even if it took him time, even if he had to thwart another assassination attempt to discover it.
After the fruitless mission to the Tower he felt the need to do something, anything productive.
Bran still slept, Lady Stark nor his siblings had really left his little cousins side, Lord Stark was locked in his solar, and Jon felt the need to do something. He couldn't sit sad by the bedside, wallowing in his failure, he needed to be productive, useful.
And so, as he dipped into his room his eyes fell to the book, and to what it held for him whilst they awaited for Bran to stir.
First he flipped to the quests page, for surely there would be some he could complete, something useful to distract him, he knew he could be preparing to go South, but who knew if that still the plan? Besides, packing would hardly take his mind off Bran.
For a moment he did sit down on his bed and cradled his head with his hands. He had failed. Failed in saving his little brother, failed in stopping his fall. The book had lauded it a success but he saw it for what it was.
Failure.
The first real hurdle in life and death for the Starks and he had fallen at it.
He had to do better, and yet he felt self-piteous and it was hard to be motivated, to shake himself and get on when he felt such self-loathing.
Failure.
He should have known however he wouldn't be allowed even a few minutes to wallow. As if on cue, to nudge him forward he saw the familiar glow of his new companion, silver and clear, and in front of him a new quest was added. He read that one first.
Quest Alert!
New Quest: Eavesdropper
Eavesdrop on a Lannister Breakfast
Reward: Learn the Lannister view on Brans fall, +5 Stealth, +200XP
Failure: You miss out on the Lannister's talk, -5 Stealth.
This is a time sensitive quest! If you fail to complete this quest before the timer runs out, then you will fail it. Time sensitive quests offer less XP bonus, but generally higher other bonuses. These quests are also known as 'storyline' quests, in that they have a huge impact on the future! They will be rarer than other quests, but it is highly recommended you complete them!
Time Remaining: 30 minutes
Hmm, well he had half an hour before he'd need to be in the Hall for that. He didn't think he'd learn anything new, but he could see he'd learn the 'Lannister view' perhaps their thoughts? He wasn't sure, but he knew he wouldn't miss it.
Still, he had some time and so looked down the rest of his quests before moving on.
He ignored the long terms quests, Claiming Your Right, Obtain Valyrian Steel, A Continent of Steel, Explore Old Valyria, Rubies of the Trident, The Land of Always Winter, and his passive quest Understanding the Rise, he was still not Level 5, getting closer and he hoped to hit Level 4 before going South, but he didn't need to worry about that quest yet.
And so, he flipped the page and focused on his current achievable quests.
Current Quests:
Dying Moments
Talk to your Uncle about your Mothers last moments.
Rewards: +200XP, See your Mothers last moments!
Failure: Your Mothers last moments remain a stranger to you.
-x-
Where to Go?
Prepare for your Tour by researching Old Valyria.
Rewards: +5 to High Valyrian Reading, 50XP.
Failure: -5 to High Valyrian Talking, -100XP
-x-
Eavesdropper
Eavesdrop on a Lannister Breakfast
Reward: Learn the Lannister view on Brans fall, +5 Stealth, +200XP
Failure: You miss out on the Lannister's talk, -5 Stealth.
Time Remaining: 30 minutes
And so there they were. He knew he'd complete the Lannister one, and quickly, and he could spend tonight researching, that would just get him over the line before he left. He wanted to have the time to talk to his Uncle about his Mother though, maybe he should prioritise that.
Regardless, he had one quest to prioritise now, and that was to eavesdrop on the Lannister's. It wouldn't be easy, but he had spent most of his life trying to be invisible and being overlooked because of his bastard status. He was confident he could hide in his own home.
He had a little bit more time and quickly checked over his stats, considering that's what he'd be upping when he levelled up and so he flipped the page to have a quick glance at them:
STR: 23
PER: 15
END: 15
CHA: 6
INT: 12
AGI: 16
LUC: 8
MAG: 8
He didn't have time to decide now what he'd add to when he levelled up, but his eyes went first to Intelligence and then possible Charisma, he'd likely need more of that down South.
Still, he didn't have tons of time and so quickly pulled on his cloak. He didn't want to but he left his weapons belt behind, it would make too much noise, but he did whistle for Ghost, who was as ever silent. Without his sword, his direwolf would help him, he was sure of that.
And so, he hurried to the main hall, to get in place before the Lannister's arrived. He was thankful when he got there, they hadn't entered yet and so easily found himself a place. There was a cupboard door that led out of the Main Hall to the side of the main table that let out an all mighty creek when he opened it. Few people used it, it blended into the stone and some people weren't even aware of it, thankfully he was.
He closed it behind him once through and found himself behind the main hall where none went, as it was just snow between backs of buildings. Still he was next to the window, couldn't be spotted as he crouched down next to Ghost, and could easily overhear whatever the Lannister's would discuss.
He settled down, sitting, moving his cloak to the ground to sit on, though he barely felt the cold it was more comfortable. Ghost quickly curled up next to him, and he rested his back against the stone. Now he would just wait, wait for the lions to emerge, and hopefully he would get some answers.
It wasn't long before he heard them filter in. The window offered a great thin area for the sound to travel through and he had no issues overhearing the Queen as she disparaged on the food, and her brother, the Kingslayer he laughed. He could also hear their children entering and resisted the urge to curse. He doubted they'd reveal much in front of them, but the book had given him the quest for a reason, surely, he could glean something.
He sat up then, still crouched but his ear pressed to the wall, he didn't want to miss a thing.
It didn't take long, ten minutes or so and he heard people moving, a door opening, a murmur and then he could hear the Queen, giving orders to a servant, and then two children giggling, an admonishment, and then the Kingslayer, laughing too. Jon felt his blood boil a little, to hear them so carefree, after what they'd done.
He heard the scraping of chairs and dared to poke his head up. He could see it was the Queen, sat in the largest chair at the centre of the table facing forward, her daughter, Mycrella if he remembered her name correctly, those blue eyes so at odds with her otherwise entirely Lannister appearance, she sat next to her Mother. The Kingslayer sat opposite, his long blonde hair hiding his face with the angle he was sat, and then there was the Queen's son, Tommen, who sat furthest away.
Once Jon confirmed who was there, he crouched back down and just listened. He had learned that as a man of the Nights Watch, as a Wildling, the value of just listening, observing.
For a good five minutes not much was discussed. The children babbled about Winterfell and received some cutting remarks from their Mother about Winterfell being inferior to Kings Landing. Jaime Lannister joked about the cold and the cold people which had Jon glaring at the stone, he moved his gaze to Ghost who had settled into the snow, bored with waiting and nothing happening. Jon was too, but not for long.
It was only when someone else arrived did he hear anything of use. He could hear Tyrion Lannister march inside and ask rather than demand some food, though he wasn't quite polite, none of the Southerners were, they had no honour in how they treated servants, which was frowned upon in the North.
'If you want to know what a man's like take a look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals'
Maester Luwin had imparted that wisdom and it came to Jon as he listened into the Lannister's. Even Tyrion the best of them all was not immune to treating the common folk like inferiors.
He felt the book then and almost cursed, he needed to be focused but took a quick look as writing appeared.
Man of the People (Perk!)
You see the importance of treating everyone equally, regardless of status. This will get you far with the commonfolk but will be looked upon negatively by those of higher status. +1 CHA
He did manage a smile at that, not only did it reflect his views, he'd never bow and simper to nobles, he wouldn't bow unless it was earned. He was also pleased to see the extra Charisma points, he desperately needed them, probably more than he valued it as a skill, especially when he went South.
Jon knew he'd never be a charmer, he was too blunt and uninterested in that, and he had no intent to become a simpering fool, deceiving and amiable. He was blunt and honest, and he always would be, but he could acknowledge down South it wouldn't hurt to be a bit more charismatic perhaps, if he could manage it.
"Beloved Siblings" He heard then Tyrion speak and quickly closed his book and turned back to the window. He needed to focus again and found himself listening closely. Here it was.
It didn't take long for the conversation to become relevant to what he needed to hear.
"Is Bran going to die?" It was Mycrella who spoke first and Jon managed a smile, to hear her concerned was nice, though she was still a Lannister, he wasn't sure a nice Lannister could exist, but then she was only a child, perhaps her Mother hadn't poisoned her yet. Still, it was nice to hear her be worried about Bran, perhaps not all Southerners were as heartless as he believed.
He thought briefly of Sam then. No, not all Southerners were heartless, some had the biggest hearts of all.
"Apparently not" Tyrion spoke, Jon focusing back on the conversation. Jon felt a relief at the words Tyrion spoke, even though he already knew for himself that Bran would be okay … well they all thought he would be. Still, hearing the confirmation out loud again was a relief, even though the guilt he felt at not completely saving his little brother still lingered.
The silence that hung in the air for a second or two after Tyrion spoke was palpable, and Jon found himself holding his breath as he waited for someone to speak.
"What do you mean?" It was the Queen next, and even he could hear the strain in her voice, though he could also hear her trying to hide it.
"The Maester says the boy may live" Damn right he would, and when another assassination attempt happened, Jon would make sure he did again.
He would not fail again.
Silence again, this time it even felt more strained. Ghost seemed to note the tension too and was back on his feet. Jon placed a hand on his back to stroke him, feeling as tense himself but listening intently.
"It's no mercy letting a child linger in such pain" He had to resist the urge to growl then. He knew Cersei fucking Lannister had no concern for Bran and to hear such lies leave her mouth made him want to march in there and tell her so. He didn't though, exercising his self-control, though he did have to grit his teeth to stop himself from telling the Queen where she could stick her false concern.
She had no real concern for Bran, and he knew then, regardless of his lack of evidence, he knew what really he'd already known, he knew the Lannister's were responsible for Bran's fall.
Sure, Cersei covered it well, she somehow managed to sound genuinely concerned, and hid the strain in her tone. The Kingslayer wisely remained silent, and Jon knew he didn't dare risk a look to see their faces, but they weren't hard to imagine.
Still, he knew the truth, he knew they had wished Bran had died, and he could guess they were the ones who'd come back to finish the job, or at least hire someone to do so. That also was reprehensible.
'The man who passes the sentence must swing the sword'
He wasn't surprised the Southerners had no such morals.
"Only the gods know for certain, all the rest of us can do is pray" Tyrion spoke then, and Jon could tell his concern was genuine. Jon had always been decent at reading people and much better having lived a life as a man of the Watch, a Wildling, a Brother again and now returned. He could even read peoples tones and words, and whereas Cersei Lannister's words had stunk of deception, Tyrion's held no such falsehood.
He felt the book glow again and knew as word turned to the North that any useful information was over. He found himself slumping back down, to sit in the snow, Ghost coming to rest across his lap, as Jon pulled the book out, allowing himself a tiny sigh of relief that he'd managed to overhear them, no matter how furious he was at what he'd heard.
Quest Completed!
Eavesdropper
Eavesdrop on a Lannister Breakfast
Reward: Learn the Lannister view on Brans fall, +5 Stealth, +200XP
Current XP: 1900/2000 XP, Stealth: +5 = 25
Once he read through, he jumped to his feet, Ghost didn't whine at the disruption, as ever silent, but he certainly shot Jon a look of annoyance. Jon managed a smile at his companion then, though his blood still boiled.
With a sigh he slipped around the corner, coming around the back of the dining hall, entering through the backdoor of the kitchens. By the time he made his way through to the main hall the Lannister's were gone. He snagged some bacon for Ghost along the way before intending to head to his room.
Not only had he learned some useful information, but he was also close to levelling up. Hopefully he could do that today, they intended to go South soon so levelling up before leaving would be useful, no, essential. He needed everything at his disposal for when they crossed Greywater Watch and ended up below the Neck.
With a nod to himself he made his way outside, much to do, as always.
He was barely out of the door though before he was accosted by an odd group of people.
Both of his Uncles, the King, half of the Kingsguard, Robb and a few of the Winterfell household and guards, heading straight to the courtyard and he was grabbed along the way.
"We're going on a hunt" Robert said without much else before striding off with a grin, and so he fell into step beside Robb who explained.
"The King wants a Northern hunt before returning to Kings Landing" He said with a shrug, "Get ready and meet us in the courtyard in 10"
Jon could only nod, and peeled off from the group to hurry back to his room, not because he'd need long, but because he knew the book would soon glow.
And so it did, almost as soon as he closed the door behind him the familiar shimmer appeared and he was not surprised as he read his newest quest.
Quest Alert!
The Stag and the Wolf
Attend and complete a hunt with the Baratheon and Stark contingent!
Reward: 200XP, +10 Hunting
Failure: -10 Hunting, -5 Bravery
Be aware there will be several smaller quest opportunities during the hunt, but you'll need to find them!
Hmm, that was interesting. Honestly, he was more interested in the smaller opportunities than the main quest, but the rewards were good, would ensure his level up and he was expected too.
It didn't take him long to get ready. To throw on a comfortable leather jerkin, to fasten his weapons belt around his hips, to give Ghost a whistle (for he was sure there would be a quest involving Ghost on the hunt), to pull on his boots and give himself the once over.
He did feel a little sing in his blood as he made his way out of his room and to the courtyard. He had been focused a lot recently on the book, on his mind, on getting ready to go South, for the future ahead. He hadn't been neglecting his training at all but hadn't had an opportunity to push himself and feel exhausted from a long hunt or day of training, it would be good to feel that now.
Plus, he was hoping the hunt would be ripe with good quests to help him before he went South.
It was odd to think he had once been without the book; it was so integrated into his life already! He was thinking about it all the time, considering it, consulting it. Was he reliant? Perhaps a little, but he saw nothing wrong with that considering how much help it had given him.
It was meant to be used; he wouldn't feel worried about using it.
Still, he remembered the Perk:
Own Man (Perk!)
You know how important it is to make your own decisions and not rely on others. This determination to decide your own fate is brave, and yet may sometimes lead you to trouble! +1 PER, +5 Bravery.
Perhaps relying on the book wasn't the right way to look at it, or what he should be doing. Perhaps he needed to think of it as using it for his success, using it for it's ends. He didn't rely, he used. He nodded to himself as he hurried down the corridors and came out to the courtyard to a large contingent already gathered.
Use for success, use to grow, to learn, to help his family and survive. It was a tool, as much as his sword, body or mind was, he just had to use it.
"Jon" The King roared then, clearly growing fonder of his best friend's bastard now he'd be coming South. "Good of you boys to join us" He said as Robb appeared next to him. They both chaffed at being called 'boys' which had the King laughing as he saddled his horse, Lord Stark not far behind, shooting them both a look to behave. Other member of both houses, Stark and Baratheon saddled too, as did Jon and Robb and trotted along next to Lord Stark. Jon noticed there were no Lannister's present, which he was thankful for.
It was a long ride to the Wolfswood but it was nice. It gave him a chance to catch up a bit with Robb, and not under the guise of a quest or trying to complete something. It was nice to just chat to his cousin, the man he still considered his brother. It was good to just talk about inane things; Robb complained about a recent politics lesson, Jon revealed Arya's recent escapades, they joked and chatted about the Lannister's (before their Father shot them a look), and they caught up with one another. It was nice, it was something Jon hadn't realised he needed before they entered the woods and hushed, but he had.
He had to remind himself that. Not everything had to be a quest. He had much to do yes, but he needed to not as the book had put – die of stress, sometimes he needed to try and relax. It would be rare, but he had to snatch those moments where he could and when he could. He had a horrible feeling they would be rare.
It wasn't a surprise that as soon as he thought that, the book glowed.
He was thankful the words would show in front of him, so he didn't have to constantly open it, and as he read the script appearing in front of him he realised he'd found his first quest.
Thankfully, Robb had fallen into pace with his Father then and Jon was left alone for a minute to read it properly and think on how to get away to do it.
Quest Alert!
In the Wolf's Jaws
Hunt and kill an animal as Ghost
Reward: +5 Warging, +5 Hunting, +5 Animal Knowledge, +5 Relationship with Ghost
Failure: -5 Warging, -10 Relationship with Ghost
Hmm, the boosts were small but there were several.
Still, how was he supposed to complete this? Warging into Ghost was hard, and he'd need to be alone to do so. Glancing around at the party he could see some splitting off, bows and arrows in hand, spears at the ready, but the main contingent was close together, hunting down deer primarily. Jon would need to separate.
He looked at Ghost, trotting a little further away so not to scare the horses, and dismounted. Robb turned to him as he did, as did his Father, as they both heard the thud of his boots on the snow.
"Nature calls" He said, and everyone nodded and went back to chatting, expecting him to catch up. He would … in time.
After all, he didn't know how long this would take. He'd warged into Ghost only briefly, and yes, in his dreams he had been Ghost but hadn't been fully aware. This one would seem to be difficult, but he had to at least try.
And so, with a deep breath he whistled for Ghost and disappeared into the trees of the Wolfswood. He was sure there'd be a few more quests, and he wanted to get off to a good start, and any quests involving Ghost, allowing him to get closer to his companion, to be a better warg, well, those were to be prioritised here, no matter how hard they seemed.
Once he was sure he was far enough away to not be stumbled across but close enough to catch back up did he sit down against the base of a tree. Ghost paused in front of him, as though he knew what was coming, did he? Jon didn't know, but he trusted his companion.
He remembered the first time they'd warged, how even before they'd joined Ghost had seemed to know it would happen, had been ready for it, had accepted it.
With a a second to take a breath, calm himself, lower his heartbeat did he then lean back against the tree, tip his head back, and get ready.
It took a few tries this time, but much less than the first, 5 minutes this time instead of 10. It felt easier too, like he knew what he was doing. He couldn't force his way in, he had to slip his mind into Ghost's, gently, kindly, not by force. He had to be at one with his direwolf.
He remembered the words of the book, 'To be at one with your animal companion' That was exactly it, to be at one.
As soon as he thought of that did he close his eyes, and feel it. Last time he had known it, this time he felt it. He felt himself slip into Ghost's mind and away from his own. Last time he had felt Ghost, the sense of 'pack' and there it was again, 'the pack' Jon was part of it now and got the sense he always would be.
Now he would do more than just go in and out of Ghost's head this time. He managed to think, 'Come on boy' This time they wouldn't just trot around the room, no, this time they would do what direwolf's were made to do.
This time they would hunt.
sooo thoughts?
I do hope you enjoyed! and don't be disappointed we ain't left winterfell yet. without too many spoilers, once we leave we won't be back for a WHILE, so don't blame me for dragging out our depature ;-;
as always I do hope you enjoyed! review and tell me your thoughts, and fav/follow for updates!
speak soon