Chapter 1: Where've You Been
The buzzing of an alarm wakes him. For the last three months, it's been the same alarm that blared every day at seven in the morning, Like routine, he turns over to his bedside table and shuts it off and just takes a moment to look around his room.
When Harry had moved into the Wealsy's house he had told Ron that he planned on buying his own house and one day build his dream one. Well, that was fourteen years ago. He had left the Dursley's and moved into the Weasley's when he was only twelve. He had told Ron all about his dream house and how he wanted it exactly made. He never wanted to have it feel closed in and wanted to be able to look out the window to see the outside world. When he was fourteen he and Hermione figured out how to read blueprints and made a house plan.
Harry wasn't expecting to build his dream house until he was much, much older. But, when he had told his surrogate family that he was planning on moving out after he turned eighteen --when he inherited the money his parents left behind for him-- and buying a house, well that's when Molly put her plan into action. She had looked into all of Harry's plans and had gotten everything set up so that when he did move out, his house would be done by the time he was 20.
Harry had cried when she told him this on his birthday. He hugged and thanked her with everything he had. "If you're still planning on buying a house then I'm all for it, but if you would like to stay here until your house is done, well you're more than welcome." She had told him and he accepted readily.
He was happy with the way that it had come out, his room especially. He had a charcoal grey platformed bed that was centered in the middle of his room. He had a matching duvet and light grey sheets. Directly next to his bed on his left was a low bedside table. It had a white countertop and beige cabinets, continuing on his left was the wall and his door that led to the rest of the house and on his right was four window planes that took up most of the wall. At the foot of his bed was a wall that held a flat screen t.v. He hadn't planned on that being there but the wall had looked bare and he felt that something should go there. Underneath it was a little ledge that held his most precious pictures. There was the one where he was a baby with his parents and his "uncles", one when he and Ron had spent that first summer together and one of Ron, Hermione, and him sitting by the lake the day of their graduation.
Past the windows led to Harry's en suite bathroom and walk in closet. The closet was in a simple white with a body length mirror at the end, on either side of the door were shelves that would he a his-and-hers. The bathroom has simple white double doors that led into the bathroom and across from the door was a white porcelain tub and behind that was a large window with tan shades. To the left and right were his-and-hers sinks and mirrors. The cabinets were a sleek black and the countertops were marble with gold sink heads. On the right side next to the tub was a black tiled shower with glass doors and an over the head showerhead. Next, to that was another large window. Finally, next to the tub was a simple porcelain toilet. The room was done in black, golds, and whites. It was really nicely done in Harry's opinion.
About ten minutes go by before Harry decides he should probably get up. He sits up and looks at the calender that sits on his bedside table. Today is the anniversary of the day he had left the Durlsley's and it was the best decision he has ever made in his life. So today is one for celebrating.
It's that thought that reminds him yesterday was the last day where he actually had to "work" that week, and he really shouldn't be up right now. For the last three months he's been helping Hermione add a LGBTQ department within her business for animal and human rights. She had started out in human resources for a few years to make enough money to start a business of her own and now it's beginning to come together pretty well.
Today she'll probably be at the local hospital volunteering with her cancer patients, while Ron would be at the police station. Harry was going to be a police officer with Ron, but had decided not to go through the police academy. He felt as though he couldn't deal with all the stress of not being able to catch that one criminal, or seeing a kid being abused and not being able to help because there wasn't anything they could arrest the parents on without actual evidence. Harry just couldn't deal with that.
He took a gap year after they graduated to think about what he wanted to do instead. He knew for a fact that he wasn't going to university but, he just didn't know what he wanted to do for a living. It wasn't like he needed to work, he was filthy rich, he just couldn't stay home all day and do nothing.
The money he had inherited came from his grandfather, who had made some type of hair product that was extremely popular and he decided to give his son a percentage of the profit. Before James and Lily had died with his "uncles" in the car accident, they added in their will to leave Harry the money and their percentage of the company that they earned when he turned eighteen.
During that year off he would go with Ron to visit Hermione on their lunch breaks. When he did, she would talk about how many kids were being left at the hospital that were in need of medical attention long term, but couldn't get the treatment because they didn't have the staff or money to just give kids treatment. Some of the kids that were diagnosed with cancer, their parents would just leave them at the hospital and never come back. When Hermione first told Harry, he had felt so bad that these kids were dying and didn't even have a family to help support them.
That's when the idea struck him. He was going to help make a ward for children that were abandoned and needed medical help. He had the funds for it so why not. So, Harry had begun talking with the hospital and their heads to see if it was possible to make this ward happen, and after a few months the ward was approved and the construction began. In a way, this was Harry being able to have something his parents would be proud of, what he would be proud of, and being able to do something that helped people.
A plus about adding the ward was that Harry loves kids and that the hospital just happens to be a few blocks from his house. Thinking about the ward reminds Harry that he hasn't been to see them in a while. Just this thought alone makes Harry's heart hurt. He decides that he'll go visit the kids at the hospital as a celebration for his departure from the Dursley's.
As he gets ready he thinks to himself how he's always wanted kids, but he knows that'll never really happen. After his gay revelation and breakup with Ginny he doesn't see having kids as a possibility. Ginny and him always got along fine, she's actually one of his best friends now, but when they began dating it just went downhill. Harry tried to fall in love with her but he just couldn't. He was under a lot of stress from school and what he would do after. Not to mention his fucking 'family.'
The Dursley's had always hated Harry with every fiber in their bones. No matter what he did, he was still scum to them. The only reason they hated him was because of his parents. When Lily and Petunia were children they had gotten along fine, until Lily was accepted into the boarding school. Her parents every year, would apply for Petunia to be placed into Hogwarts, but every year Petunia was denied. When Lily was old enough her parents had decided that they wanted to allow Lily a chance to go to this school and had applied for Lily. Much to Petunias dismay, she was accepted. Ever since then Petunia had hated Lily, and eventually James Potter. When Lily and James had died in a car accident they left Harry with Petunia and Vernon Dursley, hoping that they would love Harry as much as they did, but they were so wrong. One thing that they did, to try and make Harry seem less than them, was to apply for him to go to Hogwarts to prove he wasn't smart enough to enter, but he did and that made it ten times worse for Harry.
So, when Harry was ending his last year at the school, he decided that Ginny and him should talk. They had both agreed that them together just didn't really work out. Ginny seemed relieved and had told Harry that nothing can get in the way of their friendship, not even a little breakup. But, it wasn't all that, that kept Harry from having kids. It was the fact that he was gay and didn't have the facitlities to birth a child.
This realization hit when he graduated and went out to celebrate with his friends. Ron and Hermione had finally gotten together after years of pining, but it was Seamus and Dean that had picked where they were going to party first. Which happened to be a gay club. The two thought it funny since they were the only two who were gay. But, were they? That night Harry had found himself in the mens bathroom giving a blowjob; he had concluded that he, himself was gay. So instead he wanted to be around as many kids as possible even if they weren't going to be his one day.
~~oOOooOOooOOo~~
When Harry walked into the hospital he saw the lady at the front desk who waved him over. "Harry! It seems so long since I last saw you. How've you been?"
"I'm fine, how about you Gloria? I heard that your granddaughter had just turned five last week."
"Oh, yes! Little Sarah has gotten so big. She's growing too fast. I just wished they all stayed young like that."
"Don't we all." Harry laughed shaking his head.
"Well, I'm assuming your here for the kids today?" Harry nodded and she pulled out the paperwork for volunteers. "We admitted a new kid a couple months ago. He's not in good shape, I think maybe he should be your kid for the week."
Harry looked up from his paperwork to look at her. "What happened?"
"Not much that I know. Just that he was in a real bad accident." Harry nodded handing back the paperwork and putting on the volunteer badge. While he does he sees that another person had joined them and is signing the volunteer sheets. He doesn't get a good look at him before he is off and is on his way.
~~oOOooOOooOOo~~
When Harry comes to the hospital he has this system that he likes to go through. First, he'll go to the elderly people. He likes to talk to the people whose family has all died or don't visit. He talks to the ones that also haven't seen their family in a while because they've just busy. After he visits them for a while he goes to the adults that are lonely, without a family, or just needs someone to talk to. Then he helps with the babies and the nurses. Next, he visits all the cancer patients. The old, middle aged and young. These patients are the ones that need the most support. When he visits them he doesn't say the cliché of 'your gonna make it and keep going.' He just lets them talk out all their frustrations and agrees with them when they just need someone to agree with them and not tell them that they are strong or whatever. He usually sees Hermione there and before he moves on they talk for a bit.
After he visits the cancer ward he goes to the new addition of the hospital. This addition was his favorite because it held his kids. So here Harry was beginning to walk towards the ward with goofy smile on his face. When he finally made it to the ward he was greeted by the paintings all along the walls. It felt homey when he walked to the nurses station, instead of that awful loneliness you get when you had to go to the hospital.
"Hey Harry! Oh, its so good to see you again. How long has it been?" The main nurse saw Harry and ran to give him a hug.
"Hey Emma." Harry gave her a hug back and squeezed her a moment more before letting her go. "I think its been about three months now." He gave her a sheepish grin.
"Tsk. The kids were beginning to worry you know. Come on now lets go see them." Harry had always appreciated the way that Emma knew when he just needed to see the kids instead of talk about them. She was about two years his junior, but had always seemed a bit older than him. They made their way to the common area that the kids usually sat when they weren't getting treatment or sleeping. When walking through the double doors that hospitals always had, the first thing across from it was a wall that had a large corkboard along it that the children could put up their work whenever they drew something, or for notices that the nurses wanted to put up for them. To the right of the room was storage for the games and such, to the left was a television that had chairs and huge beanbags surrounding it. It had cable, and a game station connected to the television.
When he really thought about it, Harry liked to think this was their home and he wanted them to like it. Whenever he could, he would try to get what the kids wanted to make it feel more like home. There was about maybe twelve or thirteen kids sitting there when Emma yelled at them. "Hey, kids look who decided to make a visit!" The kids looked at her when she had yelled then looked to where she was pointing and saw Harry.
Before he could do anything, Harry was bombarded with squealing kids and bone crushing hugs.
"Harry your back!"
"See, I told you Max he didn't forget about us!"
"Look Harry. I grew a lot!" Harry tried to listen to all the kids shouts but only got a few. The one comment about him forgetting them really made him feel guilty for not coming in sooner.
"Okay, okay. Back up a bit so I can get a good look at all of you." The kids did back up a little but Harry tried to keep close to them as much as he could while being able to see all of them. They all looked so much older than when he last saw them. "Wow. Guys you can't go and grow without me!" A couple of the kids laughed. "Alright come on lets go sit." He knew they were excited to see him but they were still hospital patients and they shouldn't over exhaust themselves. Harry wanted to let the kids take the chairs and couch so he sat in one of the huge beanbags, but when he did half of the kids decided that they were going to lay on top of him as well. Harry laughed and just let them. It was actually almost time for them to take their naps because, once again they were children who were sick and going through treatment and needed to take naps.
"Don't get too comfortable. You guys are gonna have your nap soon." Harry laid his hands on the closest heads. The kids just laughed and cuddled up to him. Harry's heart swelled, when they did things like that he felt as though he were these kids' father. They all started to chat and catch Harry up on what he missed when he was gone. About ten minutes in all the kids began to drift off, the ones that weren't already sat on top of him, moved to sit next to him and after another five minutes they were all asleep. Harry felt so loved and he knew that he loved these kids with everything in him.
~~oOOooOOooOOo~~
Harry had also began to drift off with the kids when someone cleared their voice. Harry opened his eyes and saw one of the assistant nurses looking at him. "Hey Mike." Harry whispered, he didn't want the kids to wake up.
"You know these kids are supposed to be sleeping in their rooms. Not on top of you." Mike gave Harry a teasing smile.
"Well, they just missed me. That's all." Harry looked at all the sleeping kids that surrounded him. He felt that familiar warm feeling in his chest. "I never know how much I love these kids until something like this happens you know. I know that these kids are amazing in every way but its not until they cling to me like this that I realize that I matter to them just as much as they matter to me." Harry smiled at Mike.
"I don't doubt that one bit. But, as much as you love them, your going to help me put them in their beds because this really could mess with their necks having them sleep in here like that."
"Yeah, I knew this was coming." Harry sighed and began to get up. Noah and Ava were the only ones that were actually able to sleep on his chest and when he sat up and began to stand they both clutched harder onto him. Noah and Ava were best friends and they rarely did anything without the other. Ava was turning six in about a month and Noah was so excited about it because they would finally be the same age again. Harry held onto them and got up holding one kid on each of his hips while walking to their room. Since they were only kids it didn't really matter if they were sharing with the same or opposite gender, so Ava and Noah shared a room as well as with two other kids.
Harry began to set Ava down because she had the closest bed but she wrapped her arms around his neck and whispered, "Please don't leave. I don't wanna be alone again." Harry felt his heart break at that and he went to Noah's bed to but him down instead. He went down easier, giving in to the comfort of his bed. When he tucked him in he leaned in and kissed his forehead and whispered a "Sleep tight." Harry made his way back to Ava's bed and sat down on it with Ava still hanging around his neck.
"Ava. Come on let go for a minute so I can look at you." She lifted her head a little and that was it. He sighed. "Ava, listen, I know that I haven't been around for a few months, but I'll still be here when you wake up. I promise." He hugged Ava close to him and laid her down on her bed. This time she actually let him tuck her into her bed. "I promise I'll be back when you wake up. Just sleep now." He leaned down and kissed her forehead. She grabbed onto his neck again and pulled his cheek to her and gave him a kiss.
"Okay. Thank you Harry." She let him go and turned on her side and fell asleep.