I do not own any True Blood characters. Let's move on with this mess, shall we?

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Carli woke up in the bed wrapped tightly in Eric's arm the next morning, and she instantly felt the headache when she opened her eyes. She also felt the unsettled stomach and the soreness that will only come from sex. She whispered curses as she tried to move without waking him up, but his arm was firm around her. Carli took a slow breath and moved his arm very slowly, and slid out from under him as she glanced back at him. He looked worried even in his sleep, and she slowly took in his etched face. He was so stunning and she sighed as she stared at him. The time spent with him flashed through her mind, and her face dropped as she ended with the night before. She knew that she had felt good when he was holding her as Pam made her climax, but she had not felt like herself. She had not felt like herself most of the time with him, and had crossed more lines than she could deal with. Carli was so attracted to him, but she could not live that way. She felt the sting in her eyes as she looked around for her dress, and walked out into the living room to pull it off of the floor and over her body. She remembered him saying that he loved her as he held her the night before and the way he had made love to her tenderly on the couch, as his last ditch effort to likely keep her. She grabbed her purse and made sure her stuff was in it, and slung it on her arm. Carli looked around the apartment slowly and then back into the bedroom to look at him for a moment. He moved his arm in his sleep and she widened her eyes as she started to step back. Carli relaxed as he settled back into his sleep and then at his clock, seeing that it was only six in the morning. She saw his phone next to the bed and frowned as she bit her lip. Carli walked over to it and found her number in it, deleting it as she felt tears in her eyes. She set it down quietly and stared at him again. "Goodbye, Eric." Carli walked away and then glanced back as emotion washed through her, shaking her head. "I love you too. I just can't do this." She grabbed her shoes and slid them on as she pulled his locked door closed, going to the elevator and then to the street. It was just sunrise and she glanced around as she slid her big scarf onto her neck and her jacket onto her, and walked down the semi empty street. Carli went into a small store for some Gatorade and ordered breakfast from the hotel as soon as she was in her room. Ryan was arriving that night and she needed to be ready.

Carli nibbled at her fruit and toast and slammed down her Gatorade. It always made her feel better after drinking. She slid into a hot bath, soaking away everything of Eric. She needed every physical trace gone, though she was not sure what to do about the tears running down her face. His words played in her mind. I love you and I want you to stay with me. She sat up and washed herself off thoroughly, taking a shower to wash her hair afterwards. Carli found it degrading when she closely looked at herself in the mirror for any bruise or mark that might give her away. She saw nothing and she sighed in relief. It would never be spoken of, or known. She walked over to her bed and stared at her phone for a very long time, finally deleting his number. She then set it for later that afternoon so she could get ready for her real life, and crawled under the covers as she cried. She let the guilt hit her full force finally to rid herself of it, and she finally admitted how much she had cared for Eric. She took in her sadness and anger and then tried to cry it all out.

She fell asleep somewhere in the midst of it, and woke up with a jolt to her alarm. She looked around as she grabbed her phone, and saw that the light was shining into the cracked curtains. Carli sat up and drank some more juice and took a deep breath. She figured that she could make it through the night. She was meeting Ryan for dinner and she got up and took another shower, curling her hair and doing her make up as she listened to her music on her laptop. She did greens and blues that day to match the deep blue dress that she had chosen, and finished with a gloss. Carli rolled her shoulders back as she took one last look and slid her feet into black flats. Carli grabbed her purse and blinked as sadness hit her again. She would not be staring into Eric's face that night, or feeling his feet rub her calves as they talked. She left the room and walked down to the curb to hail a cab, telling him where the place was. It was Ryan's favorite. She smiled dimly as she saw it and walked inside, looking around. "Hey gorgeous." Carli jumped and turned, and Ryan smiled at her from the bench. His eyes looked relieved and happy to see her, and she walked over and slid over his lap as she hugged him. He was warm and safe, and so Ryan. He was what she knew. She felt him slide his hands into her hair, and laugh. "Red now? Last I heard it was blond and blue."

"I like to change it. You know that well." Carli said, and he stared at her with a knowing smile. He drew her close to kiss her, and it was soft and searching. She slid her tongue forward and he met it in surprise, and she felt him slide his hands tighter into her hair.

"You have never been into PDA's like that." Ryan told her, and she giggled.

"I have not seen you for awhile." Carli told him, and he raised his eyebrows at her. "Let's eat and catch up." She moved off of him and they were led to a table as the customers glanced at them. It was a booth and she slid in next to him, and he looked at her for a long moment.

"Tired, babe?"

"I went to a friend's last night and drank a bit too much. I do so much better working and being on a schedule." Carli admitted to him, leaning against him as she gazed into his dark eyes and trying to feel good about herself. He kissed her lightly and slid a hand over her dress and up her leg casually. They ordered their drinks and dinner and he told her about the tour as she sipped water and leaned back and slid one leg over his. She in turn told him about the album and felt safe in her cocoon. She had been with him five years and friends for even longer, and the band had a lot to thank him for. They ate slowly and took a cab back to the hotel, and he took her hand as they walked to the room. He dropped his bag and looked around the room with a whistle.

"Nice place. Good thing I made some money this tour." Ryan teased her, and she smiled at him. He stared at her and she swallowed the lump in her throat as he walked towards her. He took her face into her hands and kissed her, and she slid her arms around his waist slowly as she felt him sliding his tongue into her mouth. She matched his passion and he turned her and pushed her against the wall slowly. He slid his hands under her dress and over her ass, moaning against her lips. "I want to make love to you so bad, Car. I have missed you." They ended up in bed, with their clothes being removed one item at a time. He took all of her in with his lips, and she moaned at the right times and cried out at the others. She asked him to suck harder and use his teeth a little more, and he complied with surprised looks. "What's happened to you? I don't remember this about you."

"I have been alone awhile. I want all of you." Carli told him as she created her bed of lies, and he kissed her deeply as his hand trailed up to her parted thighs. She was wet enough, but she had been wetter in her recent past. He could not wait long, and soon he was moving over her and inside of her as she moaned. The first time with him after Eric was difficult, and she faked her first orgasm. She threw herself into it physically, but there was not the screaming climax she had grown used to. But still, it was Ryan. She settled into his arms afterwards in some state of content, but she dreamed of Eric that night. She dreamed of herself on her knees in front of him with his tongue sliding between her legs and over her thong. She felt the moisture sliding down her thigh as he fingered her, and she woke up moaning.

"What was all that about?" Ryan asked her sleepily, and she felt the tightness in her body as she pushed him onto his back and crawled between his legs. He groaned as she took him into her mouth, and he hardened quickly as she teased him with her lips. She used gentle teeth and her tongue and soon he was fully erect and she slid over him. She needed to get rid of the throbbing and she rode him hard in the bed, finding the sweet spot as she arched her back. He pinched her nipples as she cried out and she felt the release building inside of her. He slid his hands down to grip her ass and squeeze and she cried out with him as they came together. "The tour bus will be miserable. I can't live without this for that long."

"We'll manage." Carli told him, falling over him as she took a deep breath. They fell back to sleep and she woke up to him shaking her. "What?"

"Come to the station with us. It's a great show." Ryan urged her, and she looked at the clock to see that it was seven o clock. She groaned aloud.

"I did my thing with the guys." Carli protested, and he leaned down and kissed her nipples.

"It's XM and they do a good show. It is talking, not the in between the music sort of thing. I have spent all morning there before." His hand passed between her legs, and she arched her back. He fingered her gently and she spread them apart and urged him on. "I love seeing you after time apart. I almost forget how beautiful you are, and how sexy." He watched her face closely and she pushed his hand over her clit as she cried out softly.

"What time?" Carli breathed, and groaned as he told her an hour. "Fuck me quickly then." Ryan started to move between her legs after he shot her a look of surprise, but she moved to her knees instead and he gripped her hips as he slid inside of her. She bucked against him and he grunted as they found a rhythm, and he came just before her weak orgasm. They moved to the shower and she only had time to throw on jeans and a long sleeved tee, pulling on a hat to hide her wavy mess. She wanted to scream at the mirror since she hated going out sloppy, but she let him take her hand and pull her out of the room. They took a cab to the building and ran inside laughing as they met up with the rest of his band just inside. They hugged and kissed her quickly, and then the teasing began about her lack of make up and what little sleep the two of them must have gotten. They were like her brothers, just as her band was, and Carla rolled her eyes as they got on the elevator. The thought crossed her mind of what they would all think of her if they knew the truth about her time in New York, and she bit her lip thoughtfully. Ryan slid his hand behind her small back and she glanced up into his curious eyes as she jumped slightly. She smiled at him and he kissed her lightly, and she leaned into him. They got off on the same floor she'd been on before, and she glanced around nervously. They walked to a different studio, and she peeked in as the other entered before her. It was three main guys, and a few other scattered about on computers. They were talking about anal sex when the group walked in, and they saw her and shot each other looks as they apologized.

"Sorry, pretty girl. We were just expecting the band." One of them seemed earnest in his apology, and she grinned and waved her hand. "Who are you?"

"My girl." Ryan answered for her, and they glanced around as the sidelined guys set them up in seats and on couches. "She's cool."

They got into the show and started talking to the guys, and Carli was amused that they seemed nervous around her. The subject came back around to her and Ryan told them who she was, and the one that seemed to run the show stared at her. "You are Carli from Linger? I love you guys. I have been bugging my staff to get you on here." She grinned and thanked him, and he tilted his head. "You actually look familiar. Were you here this week?"

"I was with the band at another show. My hair was different." Carli told him, indicating the red peeking under that hat. "We would love to come in next time we are in the city." The guy played a few songs of theirs, and she blushed furiously and protested, since this was not about her at all. Ryan laughed and kissed her cheek as he whispered that it was fine, and it came back around to him. They were set up to perform and they looked at each other as they decided. Ryan sang their new hit as well as a couple of others, and then smiled as he asked her to sing one he had written for them to sing together. She blushed again but nodded, and closed her eyes as he began playing it on his acoustic guitar. She remembered when he wrote it about a depression Travis had been going through, and she felt a strong emotion pass through her as he started singing. She found her part and sang with him, and opened her eyes to share a look with him. They finished the song and the hosts clapped for them, telling them how great they sounded together. They had already told her how great she sounded during the songs, and she smiled. They ended up staying the whole show and the talk got back to the same subject that she had walked in on, as well as others. Carli felt her skin burning, as if they knew the things she had done that week. She knew that she could add to the conversation all too well, but she sat back as everyone laughed at the stories of the comic on the show. Carli remained quiet and laughed enough to make them feel like she was listening, but she was thinking about the nights she had spent with Eric. The topic of threesomes came up and she pretended to have to go to the bathroom, escaping the studio slowly enough to seem like she was not running. Carli did go to the bathroom, and her stomach growled as she smelled really good food wafting down the hallway. She thought about breakfast and then stopped walking. It smelled like more than just someone's heated up food in a break room and she glanced around slowly as she started walking.

Carli entered the bathroom and disappeared into a stall. She ended up using it for it's intended purposes and then came out as she took a deep breath. She had heard another stall close as she was in hers, and she didn't think much about it as she tried to fix her ruined hair. "Well, well." Pam's voice echoed through the bathroom, and Carli kept her gaze forward as she stiffened. "We heard you on the show. You sounded great, though I think Eric enjoyed it a bit less than I. You sound like you are wrapped up in your old life like a neat little package." Carli swallowed the lump in her throat as she tried to breathe, and Pam stood next to her. "Uncomfortable, Carli? You seemed fine when you came against my tongue the other night."

"Why would you bring that up?" Carli whispered, stepping back as she slapped the hat back on her head. "I can barely stand thinking about it."

"He is acting the same way. I think he wants to forget that he ever met you right now, and he is fast into the stage of getting ready to fuck anything in sight to get over you." Pam told her, and Carli lifted her gaze to hers with stunned eyes. "Oh, please. You're in there with your fiancé, singing and playing like you never fucked him yourself." She saw Carli's nervous glance around and she smiled slowly. "We're alone. Don't worry."

"He told me that he loved me." Carli said, not sure if she meant for Pam to hear it.

"Bet you wish you would have said it back now." Pam told her, and she saw how the blow hit Carli as she blinked her wet eyes. She stepped closer and brushed her lips against Carli's cheek as she girl stiffened again. "Your pussy tasted wonderful, Carli." She left the bathroom and Carli held onto the sink as she breathed, and then splashed cold water on her face. She left the empty bathroom thanking the stars that she had been blessed with that, and began the walk down to the studio again. She stopped when she saw Eric a few feet past the entrance leaning close to a girl as he smiled his charming smile. She felt like she had been punched, and she stared at him as he took a phone from the girl and tapped some numbers into it. He glanced sideways and his eyes met her stunned gaze, and he coldly gazed at her before giving the blonde his attentions again. Carli let out a very soft whimper and finished walking to the studio, entering to hear talk about her and Ryan's engagement. It occurred to her that it was also playing in the hall, and she smiled a very forced smile as she sat down next to him. Her muscles deep within were clenched and she felt her desire for Eric surging through her at the sight of him, and it balanced out the envy that she was feeling at the moment. She forced herself into the conversation and they discussed a possible wedding date and sang one last song before the show ended. Carli had refused to look up at all and she was relieved to see no sign of Eric or his new girl as they left with the show, having agreed to breakfast. They all headed to a diner, and she ordered a plate and some soda as she needed waking up. She talked about the tours in the works with the guy that seemed to know her band and the upcoming record and she noticed how the comedian gazed at her with interest when Ryan was not looking. She gazed out of the window to see Eric walking with he girl from the hallway, but she could see the pain on his face. She wondered what he must have felt when he saw that she had erased her number and how he must have felt when he woke up alone that morning. She had taken the easy way out, and she watched the girl look up at him with stars in her eyes as they talked. Carli knew all too well the stars she would see after the first orgasm with him, and it hurt. She felt eyes on her, and she glanced at Ryan next to her with a smile as he slid his hand up her neck and into her hair. She remembered when Eric had done that at Starbucks, and her breath caught in her throat. She knew that Ryan was glancing at her again, and she felt the other gazes. She leaned her head back and smiled as she leaned towards him, and he kissed her cheek easily.

The two of them headed to the hotel for a nap, and she curled up half naked in his arms. She slept fitfully and woke up to his lips on hers as he kissed her slowly. "I was thinking that we needed to step it up a bit when we were on the show this morning." Ryan murmured against her lips, and she slid his hand up his side. "Let's go shopping. You need a diamond on your finger, Carli."

"What" Carli asked, pulling away to gaze at him.

"I want to make it official." Ryan said, and she tried to smile. "Let's do that and go to dinner, and spend one last night here before the show tomorrow night and then we begin road life." He kissed her harder, and she felt him roll her onto her back and move over her. "I love you, Carli. I know I don't tell you enough, and I know how much you are alone. But I do love you."

"I love you, Ryan." Carli said weakly, and the ebbing desire still pulsed between her legs. She parted her legs and he moved between them as he kissed her deeply and she felt him harden against her.

"I don't think we have ever made love this much before in a short period." Ryan murmured, and she slid her arms up his back as she used her nails lightly on his skin.

"We should have. We have always had such little time together." Carli told him, and he groaned as he pressed into her. She easily persuaded him into making love to her, and he thrust into her as she bent over her. She slung one leg over his shoulder and gasped as he slid over that sweet spot, bringing back the feeling that Eric always gave her. She closed her eyes and pretended it was him inside of her as Ryan's length slid over her again and again, and she cried out as the orgasm hit her hard. Carli remembered the way that she and Ryan had always been before, comfortable and content, but not overly passionate. He choked and came after her, unable to control it with her body spasms tightening around him.

"I will buy you as many rings as you want with times like this. Fuck, Carli. You felt good." Ryan told her as he dipped down to kiss her lips gently.

"Good. Maybe you'll stay home with me sometimes." Carli told him, and he stared at her. She wondered how harsh her tone had been, and she frowned.

"Do you hate our life together?" Ryan asked her, and she shook her head.

"No, no. Of course not. I am just as busy as you lately, Ryan. I get lonely sometimes, but I do love you." Carli stumbled over her words, and he smiled at her.

"Good. I worry sometimes. You're so beautiful and I know that others must want you." Ryan said, and she felt her heart begin to pound. He kissed her just above her nipple and then gazed at her. "Listen to your heart."

"I reckon you have that effect on me." Carli assured him, and he kissed her deeply as she calmed herself down after a near panic attack. They made it out of bed and hit the streets afterwards, once Carli had talked him into giving her some time. She wore a black dress with stockings and heels, and he pulled her by the hand into Tiffany's first with a slow smile. She took in the finality of it all as she smiled and became dazzled with all of the sparkle, but the guilt still haunted her. They looked at several rings, and Carli picked up one and twisted it between her fingers. Could she do this? She had never been as tempted as she had been with Eric, and that was in five years. Ryan was an amazing person. She glanced up at him and he raised one eyebrow at her as she smiled at him. She slid it onto her finger, and admired the simplicity of the diamond band. He leaned in to kiss her, and the woman helping them confirmed that it was the one and completed the transaction. Ryan dropped to his knees as it was handed back to him, and stared up at her.

"Carli, I love you. Will you still do me the honor of being my wife?" His words were sure, and his eyes were emotional. She only saw his love and her security in them, and she smiled.

"You know I will." She slid to the floor as well, and they kissed deeply as she hugged him. She would be happy with him, despite the ache that she felt in her heart. She could do this. They stood up after a few moments and he slid the ring onto her finger, and she hugged him again. She didn't feel the tears that girls sometimes felt in her eyes, but she assumed it was different for everybody. She had been surprised and pleased the first proposal, and she would be there again. They caught a cab to a place on the water for an early dinner and Carli realized it was the place she had been to the first time with Eric. She winced for a brief second and walked in with Ryan, and they were soon seated at a table overlooking the water. He stroked her hand across the table as they talked about weddings, and they both wanted small. Her parents and two brothers were in Tennessee and she had little family beyond that, and his family was in England. They had a few friends that would attend, and they discussed options of places. He was happy, and she saw it as she looked into his face. He picked his phone up off the table, and grinned.

"The news is out. Guess we were recognized." Ryan told her, and she laughed. They ate dinner and talked about the next few days of the tour, as well as the next day. They would be leaving after the show. She took her last bite and excused herself to use the bathroom. She was coming out as she was lost in thought when she crashed into a figure, and she felt the heat the same instant that she glanced up.

"Eric." Carli said in a whisper, as she saw the intense look in his eyes. She started to push past him, but he caught her arm.

"You never bothered to say goodbye. You just disappeared." His voice was cold, and she glanced at him.

"I had to. I have to go, Eric." Carli told him, realizing that they were likely both on dates that night. The idea of him with another woman hurt, and she looked down. She hated the idea of the night ending in his bed, and her body tightened as she gasped. "Why do you do that to me?"

"One more time. I want to see you one more time before you go." Eric told her softly, and she met his eyes. "My apartment tomorrow. You can get away?"

"We both know what will happen if I go there." Carli told him, and he raised one eyebrow.

"Exactly my point." Eric said, and she closed her eyes.

"I can try tomorrow." Carli found herself saying, and her eyes widened. Eric handed her his phone and she stared at him.

"I need your number. I will send a blank text so you have mine and can contact me." Eric told her, and she reluctantly punched it in. "If I hear nothing, I will know why and it will be deleted." Eric assured her, and she stared at him. Her body dampened between her legs as she imagined him inside of her again, and she winced as her muscles contracted. "If your eyes represent anything, I can see your want."

"I'll try." Carli said, turning her face down and walking back to her table slowly. Nobody had heard them speak, so nobody knew. She glanced around to see the blond from the station sitting alone at a table, and she glared at her for a moment. She was very pretty and she looked kind, but Carli didn't want to share him. She looked over at Ryan, who was smiling at her, and sat down as she smiled into his eyes. They finished their dinners, and he led her to the car by the hand as she looked down. She felt Eric's lips on hers, and his hands touching her body. She blinked and looked up as Ryan spoke, and nodded as they reached the main street to catch a cab. They went back to the hotel and turned on a movie, cuddling together as he kissed her. His lips got more intense and she struggled with her thoughts of the following day and the desire flowing through her from the idea, and she met his tongue and slid over his body. Her dress was already off and on the chair, and he unhooked her bra and drew her nipple into his mouth. She cried out as he followed her previous instructions and gently bit it, and his hands slid down and over her ass.

"I love you, Carli." Ryan murmured against her, sucking her hard into his mouth. He pressed her onto her back and moved down her body, and she moaned as he kissed her wet thighs. "You're all wet and ready." He licked her and she cried out, longing for a sweet release. He was rough there too, and soon she was flooding his lips as she came. They made love fiercely as he pushed her up and into the pillows, and she pulled him deeper into her as she came close again. She felt him pull her close and kiss her again as they both fought sleep, and she watched him as he slid into peaceful rest first. She heard a beep and she rolled over slowly to look at her phone. There was a blank text and she stared at the familiar number. She cleared the screen, saving the information, and set it down and rested against him again, closing her eyes and she let her thoughts wander.