Chapter Seven: Who The Hell Are You?

Tony was surprised to find that he wasn't the last person to arrive at work, even though visiting Alicia had added another hour onto his usual work drive. Ziva was already sitting at the desk closest to the elevator, tapping away at her computer. Thankfully, Tony realised that this meant desk work. He'd never looked forward to desk work, but that morning he was too exhausted for anything else. Just beyond her, he could spot Gibbs at his desk, coffee in hand as he stared at his computer screen. Penny skipped off ahead of him, stopping at Ziva's desk with a bright smile as she popped her face up before her new friend.

"Hi, Ziva!" she said brightly.

Ziva smiled at the little girl, turning away from the computer screen for a moment and leaning on her forearms on the desk. "Shalom, Penny."

As she had done the night before, Penny tilted her head to one side, scrunching her nose. "What does that one mean?"

"It means 'hello'."

"In Hebrew?"

Ziva was impressed at her memory for her age. "That's right, Penny, well done."

"Oh," she said, understanding now. "Shalom," she repeated.

"You said it very clearly," Ziva praised. "We'll have to teach you some more words. Did you go and see your mother this morning?"

Penny nodded. "Yeah, but we couldn't stay long because Daddy had to come to work."

Tony arrived up behind her, and was about to go to his own desk when Penny tugged on his trouser leg, pointing at Gibbs suspiciously. "Whoozzat, Daddy?" she asked him in a loud whisper.

"That's my boss," he told her. "Your Uncle Gibbs."

"Uncle Gibbs?" the man in question repeated from behind his desk.

Tony shrugged helplessly, and Penny looked at her new uncle with a scrutinising gaze. "Uncle Gibbs has got a serious face," she observed.

"He has, but he's not scary," Tony assured her.

"I know," Penny nodded, before skipping over to Gibbs's desk, leaving Tony to put his bag at his own desk and turn his computer on. Penny stopped at Gibbs's side. "Hello, Uncle Gibbs."

Gibbs turned his chair. "Hello there, Penny."

She looked at him curiously. "You don't say Hebrew like Ziva?" she asked him.

"No, I don't," he half laughed. "Has she been teaching you already?"

She nodded. "I know that 'shalom' means hello and 'lyla tov' means goodnight," she recited proudly.

"You have a very good memory, Penny," Ziva praised her, as she stood from her desk, crossing the bullpen so that she was leaning over Tony's desk. "How did it go last night?" she asked him.

"Slept through the night," he confirmed.

She smiled. "See, I told you that you would be fine."

"She slept through, not me," he contradicted her, before coming out from behind his desk and going over to McGee's currently empty one. "Here you go, Penny," he announced, catching her attention away from where she was asking to try some of Gibbs's coffee. "Your own desk!"

"DiNozzo," Gibbs warned.

"Yes, boss?"

"McGee will be here any minute, Tony," Ziva pointed out, glancing at her watch to confirm that he was already two hours late.

"But he's not here now," he said simply, making Penny comfortable in McGee's chair and spreading an array of McGee's expensive jotter pens and personalised notepaper before her so that she could draw to her heart's content. When McGee did arrive half an hour later, he was breathing heavily.

"Sorry I'm late, boss," he panted as he rushed through the bullpen. "Car trouble."

"Don't let it happen again," Gibbs warned, as he did any time someone mentioned 'car trouble'.

"No, boss, I..." he stopped short, standing before his desk. "Why is there a little girl at my desk and why does she look like Tony?" he asked.

"Long story," Tony said, not looking up from his paperwork.

McGee looked up, shocked to find that no one was paying the girl the slightest bit of attention. "I missed something big, didn't I?" he realised.

"Yes, you did," Ziva confirmed, whilst rooting through her desk drawer for her stapler.

Penny finally noticed McGee, and looked up at him, tilting her head to one side. "Hi, I'm Penny. Who the Hell are you?"

"Penny," Tony jumped in quickly. "Bad word. Don't say Hell."

"Sorry, Daddy," she grumbled.

McGee's eyes widened. "'Daddy'?"

"She's DiNozzo's daughter," Gibbs said, as he stood up from his desk and stopped in front of Penny. "I'm going down to the lab. Penny, you're in charge. Make sure these guys behave themselves."

She nodded with a proud salute. "Yes, Uncle Gibbs."

Gibbs headed to the elevator, and McGee continued to stand motionless, shocked at what he had walked into. "Uncle Gibbs? ... daughter?...how late am I?"

"Late enough to make your desk hers for the day, Probie," Tony told him.

"I didn't know you had a daughter," McGee said, as he doubled back to Tony's desk, lowering his voice.

"Neither did I until yesterday."

"What is she doing here?" he asked again.

"Mom's sick." Penny said from McGee's desk, not looking up from her drawing. "I'm gonna live with Daddy now."

"Oh," he said, understanding the situation more.

"Penny, this is another uncle," Tony called over to her.

McGee looked almost touched for a moment. "I'm an uncle?"

"Yes."

"What's his name?" Penny asked.

"His name's Probie," Tony smirked.

"Tony-"

"Hello, Uncle Probie," Penny waved at him, from his desk, his chair, and holding one of his pens.

"Great," he grumbled, as Ziva laughed from behind him.

--

Something was different in the lab. It was...it was still. It was...quiet. Abby was missing something...her pigtails. She was...sleeping? Gibbs walked over to the desk, where she had rested her head on her arms, her dark hair spilling over the white of her lab coat where she hadn't tied it up in her usual manner. "Abs," he said, and shook her shoulder when he got no response. "Abby?"

"Gibbs!" she exclaimed, her head shooting up from her arms.

"No pigtails," he observed simply.

"I felt like doing something different today," she shrugged.

"You don't do different."

"Maybe it's time for a change," she countered.

"You don't change. Where's the music?"

"There is no music today."

He frowned. "There's always music. Are you sick or something?"

"I'm fine," she insisted.

"You look paler than usual, too."

She surrendered, standing up and staring to pace the room with an alarming change of mood. "Fine, so I don't feel great today. Is that a crime? Never mind," she changed again, walking back over to him. "What can I do for you, bossman?"

"You're sick, aren't you?" he confirmed.

"Not if you need me to do something."

"Abs-"

"Uh oh," she interrupted him, stepping to the side and leaning over the trashcan, emptying her stomach into it. Gibbs was beside her in an instant, holding back her hair as she hadn't put it into pigtails. She gagged for several minutes, and then stood up slowly.

"All done?" he asked, his voice softer now.

She nodded. "Yeah."

He put his hand on her forehead, ignoring the roll of her eyes. "Fever. You're sick."

"I'm not sick," she insisted again.

He looked at her, the dark circles under her eyes and pale skin standing out so much more than lack of sleep would have caused. "If you're not sick, then who's the father?" he asked her.

Her eyes widened. "I'm not pregnant," she said, so rushed it was unbelievable.

"Fever, vomiting, exhaustion...you're either sick or you're pregnant," he narrowed down.

"I'm not sick."

"Then you're pregnant," he told her. "So who is the father?"

She narrowed her eyes at him. "What do you know about being pregnant?" she accused him.

"I know all about it," he pointed out, not needing to tell her about Shannon's pregnancy. Abby knew about Kelly.

"Good for you," she announced. "But I'm not pregnant."

She sat back down in her chair, annoyed at the exhaustion she felt. She rested her head on her arms again on the desk. Gibbs followed her to the desk and sat down on an empty patch of it. "Morning sickness sucks, doesn't it?" he half-teased her.

"It's not morning sickness," she mumbled into her arms. "I just ate something bad or something."

To her surprise, Gibbs actually laughed. "Abs, most women use stomach flu as their excuse, which is much more believable, so the 'I ate something bad' isn't going to fool me."

She raised her head, glaring at him. "You are a horrible person."

"Who's the father, Abby?" he asked her, seriously this time. She didn't answer him. "You do know who it is, don't you?" Again she hesitated. "Do you know? Abby, don't tell me you had a one night stand--"

"It would have to be McGee's," she whispered hesitantly, not wanting to reveal the secret relationship they'd been hiding under Gibbs' nose but now having no choice. "There's no way it could be anyone else's." She was silent for a moment, and then she looked up at Gibbs. "I can't be pregnant, can I?"

"Do I have to give you a rule 12 lecture?" he asked her.

She grimaced. "I think it's a bit late for that," she told him.

"Then yes, there's a possibility that you could be pregnant."

"Uh oh," she mumbled again.

"You bet," he confirmed, but then he teased her again. "Does this make me Uncle Gibbs or Grandpa Gibbs?" he asked her.

She looked up at him again, shocked. "Gibbs! You can't tell a soul about this, living or dead. I mean it!"

"Do a test or go to a doctor," he told her.

She leaned back in her chair, folding her arms over her chest stubbornly. "Maybe I don't want to."

Gibbs shrugged, standing from the desk and going to leave. "Then maybe McGee needs a rule 12 lecture," he said simply.

Abby let out an unfair sound, even more so like a teenager than her stubbornness had been. "That's blackmail!"

Gibbs turned back at the door, thinking this over. He nodded. "Hmm...yes, it is."

--

The blackmail had worked, and having done a blood test herself, which revealed to be positive, she actually doubted her own work for once, wondering if someone had contaminated her blood with hormones overnight. Someone had, of course, and that someone was McGee. So, she decided that going to the doctor on her three-hour-early lunch break would be the best thing to do. However, she was just about to leave the lab when the doors opened, and Ziva all but ran into her.

"Abby-"

"I'm fine!" she insisted quickly, before another person could tell her that she looked paler than usual.

Ziva, however, looked at her strangely. "...okay."

"What can I do for you?" Abby asked brightly. "Please tell me you have something for me to do. I'm dying of boredom down here."

"Actually, I came down here to share some news," Ziva said.

Abby's eyes widened and she clapped her hands together. "You're getting married!"

Again, Ziva looked confused. "Who would I be getting married to?" she asked.

"I don't know, maybe Tony opened his eyes and-"

"Tony's eyes are firmly open and he's having enough troubles with the female species at the moment as it is," she cut Abby off.

"Ooohh, is this about the news?" she asked. Ziva nodded. "Then come join me on a break," Abby said, dragging Ziva through the lab by the arm over to where the workbenches were. "So, spill!"

"Well, it is not so much my news as Tony's. He asked me to come and tell you," she told Abby. "I am sure you noticed that Tony and I disappeared early yesterday afternoon."

"Does this involve a shotgun wedding?" Abby asked, her eyes gleaming.

"Abby, no onehas got married!" Ziva cried.

"Oh, right, continue."

"I went to help Tony with bath time and-"

Abby stopped her there. "Is this a story that has explicit details, because I'm going to need to get another drink first if it is?"

"No, I went to help him with Penny's bath time," she corrected her.

She raised an eyebrow. "Are you sure about the explicit details?"

"Penny is Tony's daughter, Abby," Ziva finally explained.

Her eyes widened. "Tony has a daughter? Since when?"

"Since yesterday. She's three years old. Her mother has leukaemia and has asked Tony to care for Penny when she has passed."

Abby's excitement faded, and she looked down at the floor sadly. "Oh my God...Poor Tony...and that poor little girl."

Ziva was about to speak again when she noticed what was on the work bench before them. "Abby, is that...a decaffeinated caff-pow?" she asked warily.

"Um...yes. Yes, it is," Abby nodded. "I thought it might be time to kick the caffeine addiction again."

She eyed her warily. "Is something wrong?"

"No, it's just decaf," she said innocently.

"Abby?"

She snapped irritatedly. "Do you need me to spell it out for you, Ziva? D-e-c-a-"

"I believe that you are spelling out the wrong word, Abby," Ziva smirked.

"And what should I be spelling?" Abby asked, feeling her heart pounding.

"P-r-e-g-"

"Shhh!" she exclaimed, placing her hand over Ziva's mouth and looking around suspiciously. "I haven't told McGee yet!"

Abby removed her hand, and Ziva gasped. "So, you are...?"

"Maybe. I did a blood test myself and that was an all systems go, so I'm going to the doctor," she revealed.

"Does Gibbs know?" Ziva asked.

"Gibbs knew before I knew," Abby groaned. "Sneaky silver fox."

"What are you going to do?"

Abby sighed. What was she going to do? "For a start, I'll be sneaking out for my doctors appointment before McGee comes down here looking for me."

Ziva smiled. "If this is the case then now may be your best opportunity. He is currently attempting to reclaim his desk from Penny."

Abby frowned. "Penny has his desk?"

She nodded. "Tony sat her there before he arrived this morning and she refuses to leave it."

"And Gibbs is allowing this?"

"Allowing it? He's encouraging it."

The two of them laughed together. "I must meet this child," Abby announced.

"No," Ziva corrected. "You must go to the doctor."

"I must go to the doctor," she repeated obediently.

"Now."

"Right now," Abby said, grabbing her purse from her desk drawer.

"I will keep McGee distracted in the meantime for you," Ziva offered, as they headed to the elevator together.

Abby nodded, distracted as she went one way and Ziva another. Why did she get the feeling that this was going to change things, no matter what the outcome?