CHAPTER FOURTEEN
"But this is what you wanted."
The unfamiliar voice stirred Peridot from her slumber, although the words failed to register. She blinked sleepily in the bright light for a moment, then her eyes snapped open in confusion. She was facing Steven, who was snoring quietly, but the rest of the room had vanished, leaving them on the floor of a vast, white chamber. She slowly sat up, turned around and almost screamed. Looming over her was the enormous form of Blue Diamond, with Yellow Diamond close behind.
Instinctively, she threw her arms up to protect her gem, even though she knew it would be of little help when the killing blow landed.
"-for a colony-"
She hadn't noticed Blue Diamond was still talking instead of trying to shatter her, but when several more seconds passed without her form being destroyed, she dared lower her arms to see what was going on.
"-all you want is to be rid of it," Blue Diamond said, glaring down at her.
"...Huh?" Peridot looked around, but the only other person there was Steven, and he wasn't exactly in a position to contribute to the conversation. "Do you... mean me?" Was Blue Diamond talking about the Cluster? But the Cluster was Yellow Diamond's project, why was she just standing there with her back to them while Blue told her off?
"First there were too many organics, then their cities were too difficult to dismantle-"
Understanding dawned upon her and she swiveled back around to look at Steven again, still snoring away peacefully. This had to be another one of his Pink Diamond dreams, brought to life by the room. "Steven!" she hissed and gave him a shake.
"Ugh... one more minute," he mumbled, and snuggled up against her. "W'na see..."
"Steven!" She shook him again, and when that had no effect, she reached out and pinched his arm.
"Ow! What-"
"Shh," she hissed, jerking her head towards the Diamonds, but despite the sudden flurry of activity, Blue continued talking down at them.
Steven' eyes widened in dismay. "Mmph-" He reached up and pushed her hand away from his mouth. "The Diamonds!"
"Yes, I had noticed them too," she said a little waspishly. "I assume you were in the midst of another Pink Diamond dream?"
"But..." He shook his head. "I'm awake now, they shouldn't be here." He slowly stood up and stepped in front of Peridot, just in case the two fake Diamonds suddenly became self-aware and attacked. Peridot quickly scrambled to her feet as well, and then phased on her jumpsuit. Even though neither of the Diamonds actually seemed to be aware of them, she didn't particularly want to be naked in front of them.
"As long as you are there to rule, this colony will be completed."
Blue Diamond was telling me off because I didn't want Earth any more because of the rebellion. And then someone- well, I guess it must have been Mom- came up behind me and stabbed me and shattered my gem."
What if I had a dream where I died?
Those two memories flicked through Peridot's mind in rapid succession. She didn't pause to look back and see if her suspicions were correct; she didn't pause to think at all. Instead, she grabbed Steven's waist and threw him aside as hard as she could. Taken entirely by surprise, he crashed heavily to the ground. "Oof!"
"Ah!"
He lay there for a moment, briefly stunned, then rolled over to ask what the hell she'd done that for, but as soon as he saw her, the words died on his lips and all he could do was stare at the scene before him in disbelief. "No," he whispered. It wasn't real. He was still asleep, he was still dreaming and Pearl had not really stabbed his mother's sword through the middle of Peridot's chest. "No! NO!"
Peridot looked down at the blade and tentatively reached up to touch it. The wound hurt less than she'd expected, but she could already tell it was a fatal blow. Of course it was, it was intended to destroy a Diamond, after all. Thankfully her gem was in an entirely different location. She'd be fine. In fact, she almost welcomed the opportunity to redesign her form. She'd definitely omit the skeleton, for a start. Really, the only downside to this was that Steven had to witness it. She opened her mouth to assure him that everything would be fine, but her stupid simulated human lungs were filling up with blood (and she made an immediate mental note to get rid of those when she came back), making it almost impossible to get the words out. Still, she tried. "L-love you," she choked out through blood-spattered lips, and gave him a thumbs up.
"NO! Make it stop, make it stop!" Steven screamed hysterically.
Abruptly, the scene changed. The white chamber vanished. Pearl vanished. The sword vanished. And with nothing to plug the wound, blood sprayed out of Peridot's chest for a moment before her body finally succumbed to the trauma and poofed. He lunged forward to catch her gem, missed, and clawed frantically at the pink clouds (maybe it had vanished too, maybe it wasn't really her, maybe he'd been alone here all along) until he found it. "WHAT DID YOU DO!?" he screamed, looking wildly around the room for something to focus his rage and misery upon.
Maddeningly enough, the room failed to oblige. No tiny whale appeared to talk to him, probably because the room knew perfectly well he'd just try to throttle it at once. Instead, a disembodied voice spoke. "Only what you requested, Steven."
"What!?" He staggered to his feet, holding Peridot's gem protectively against his chest. "When did I ever ask for this!?"
"You wished to see," the room replied calmly.
"What?" he asked again, shaking his head in miserable confusion. "I never- when!?"
"Just before you woke up," the room reminded him. "You wished to see one minute more."
"Wh-what are you talking about?" He shook his head. "I don't- I was asleep!" A thought suddenly occurred to him. "And I didn't give you the keyword!"
For a moment, the room was silent, then the voice spoke softly. "You never stated that your wishes required a keyword."
An icy chill washed over him. All of a sudden, he could remember himself, standing in the room, knowing he'd forgotten something, but in too much of a rush to really think about it. How could he have been so stupid? But still... "Why did you let her do it? You must have know I never wanted her to get hurt!"
"You ordered that she not be forced to do anything she didn't want to do. Not under any circumstances ever," the room said. "I was unable to override that command."
He looked down at the smooth, green gemstone in his hands and his eyes filled up with tears. "You sh-should've done it anyway."
"She wanted to save you," the room said patiently. "She knew where the blow would land-"
"Shut up," Steven spat. "I hate you." He turned around and fled through the door that opened obligingly for him, just as he wanted, but it was far too little, far too late, and he knew he'd never be able to trust the room enough to ever return again.
xxx
Peridot's gem glowed and rose into the air. For a moment it hung there, then cycled rapidly between her few previous forms before settling upon the new outline she'd chosen. There was a flash of light, and she landed gracefully on the floor and opened her eyes. There was a split-second in which she noticed she appeared to be in her own room rather than the white chamber, and then she was in Steven's arms and her face was being covered in kisses. And also snot and tears, but she tried not to mind that too much.
"You're back!" he choked out in between kisses. "You're back, oh I missed you so much!"
"I'm sorry I took so long," she apologized, although to tell the truth, she hadn't the faintest idea how long it had been. "I tried to be as quick as possible, but I had to make a few important changes. For instance, I have decided a skeleton is unnecessary. And the cardiovascular system. It just makes such a mess when it's punctured!"
Steven let out a noisy sob and she cringed. Perhaps that hadn't been the most tactful thing to say. "I did keep some of the digestive system though," she began to ramble. "So I can continue to share meals with you, because that is something I do genuinely enjoy. And- and some of the more, ah, recreational bits. I had quite a lot of fun using them. With you."
That didn't seem to cheer him up either. She'd rather hoped that having witnessed gems being poofed in the past (herself included) only to reform unharmed had desensitized him a little, but then, she supposed it had happened during an emotionally charged moment, and Steven had always been more emotional than logical.
She sighed and hugged him a little tighter. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "I didn't mean to upset you. I had hoped there would be enough time for me to evade the attack as well, but knowing where the blow would land, my immediate priority was getting you out of range. That attack was designed to shatter your gem, but I knew the worst it would do to me is simply destroy my form."
"Oh." Steven half-laughed, half-sobbed. How was he supposed to explain that his gem would've been fine after all? "You- you clod! That was stupid, you- you shouldn't have done that, I would've-" He gulped and kissed her hair again. "Promise me you'll never do anything like that again, promise me!"
"Erm." Peridot discreetly crossed her fingers, because there was absolutely no way she was going to comply with that request. "I promise. So how long was I gone for?" she asked, quickly changing the subject.
Steven released her and blew his nose into a rather raggedy tissue before replying. "Just over a day."
"Ah, are the other gems back then? Do they know what happened?" She glanced over at the door as she spoke, suddenly very glad she'd installed a lock.
"I um, gave them a pretty vague outline," he said. "Your new outfit's nice, by the way."
"Oh, thanks." Peridot glanced down at the new cropped shirt and shorts with leggings underneath that she'd chosen for her new form. "I was extremely tempted to make it a big, flouncy princess dress, but that sort of outfit for my default form would've been highly impractical, not to mention inappropriate for most day-to-day activities," she admitted. "So did you mention the Diamond dream?"
"A princesses dress would've been pretty cool though," Steven said, ignoring her question. "We could go and buy you one, if you like. As a 'welcome back' present."
"Hmm..." Peridot considered that suggestion for a moment and then reluctantly shook her head. "The problem remains, when is there ever going to be an occasion in which a princess dress would be appropriate?"
"I can think of one," he said, and waggled his eyebrows suggestively.
However, the effect was somewhat diminished by his red-rimmed puffy eyes and runny nose, and Peridot frowned, suddenly suspicious. "Did you discuss the Diamond dreams with the other gems?" she asked again.
Steven immediately looked away and began twiddling his fingers. "Um... yeah, kind of," he muttered. "It came up in passing."
Peridot waited for him to elaborate. He didn't. "...And?" she finally prompted. "Did they have any suggestions as to what could be the source?"
"Um." He bit his lip and closed his eyes. Where to even start? He'd spent the last day agonizing over how to break the news to her, and he still hadn't figured out how to do it, mostly because he simply couldn't imagine an outcome that didn't end horribly.
Well it turns out, I was right when I said it was Mom's memories. Even the one where Pink Diamond was whining for her own colony. How? Now that's a funny story.
So you know how you were sent here to check on the Cluster and the prototypes to try and figure out how to make functional gems out of era 1 gem shards? Do you think the ultimate goal was for you to fix Pink Diamond's shards? Well, you'll never believe this, but-
What's the difference between my mom and Pink Diamond? Literally nothing! Ha ha ha!
What he wouldn't give for one of Garnet's future vision forehead kisses right then.
What he wouldn't give for Garnet right then-
"Steven? What's wrong?" Peridot asked in alarm as his eyes welled up again.
"It's- I can't- Mom-" He covered his face in his hands and shook his head helplessly. He couldn't tell her. He had to tell her. The secret was out now, the other gems knew. If he didn't tell her, one of them would and it would sound even worse coming from them. He took a deep breath and tried again. "We... we figured it out, why I was dreaming about Pink Diamond," he said slowly, forcing himself to keep eye contact. "It's because Pink Diamond... was my mom."