CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

"Ugh." Amethyst stuck her tongue out and grimaced as Ruby and Sapphire made eyes at each other over the book of invitation designs. "It's like living with a pair of horny teenagers."

Steven and Peridot stopped flicking through bridal magazines and frowned.

"Sorry, my bad," Amethyst corrected. "The horny teenagers have a little more discretion."

The couple glared at her for a moment longer before turning back to their magazine. "Discrete? We've been the very model of virtue," Steven complained under his breath.

"Yeah. And it sucks," Peridot muttered back, tearing out a page at the same time in the hope that Amethyst wouldn't hear her comment and butt in with something crude. Happily, she'd already turned her attention back to the catering plans. Still, now the subject had been brought up, she couldn't get it out of her head and she cast an envious look over at Ruby and Sapphire, who had given up pretending to choose a design and were now joined together at the lips.

"What's that?" Pearl asked.

"Nothing! What?"

Pearl reached out and tugged the page out of her hand. "Did you choose a flower girl outfit already- huh?" She frowned in confusion at the ragged picture of a smiling bride and groom in a forest. "I thought we'd all agreed on a beach wedding?"

"It's not for them," Peridot said flatly, snatching the picture back.

Pearl opened her mouth and then closed it again. Her eyes flickered over to Amethyst, who smirked knowingly, over to Steven, who blushed and pretended to be very interested in pictures of tiaras, before finally landing on the happy couple. "Ahem," she said pointedly. "Have you chosen a design yet?"

"Mphm-" Ruby reluctantly tore her lips off of her fiancee and tried again. "I was thinking it'd be cool if we had flames?"

"And dolphins," Sapphire quickly added.

"Dolphins with flames!"

Steven tossed his magazine aside and jumped to his feet. "I think page 135 will have exactly what you're looking for," he said smugly, knowing his plans included at least three variations of flaming dolphins.

Sure enough, when Sapphire turned to page 135, they found themselves torn between a dolphin with sunglasses and a dolphin with a lei. "How do you actually have options for this?" Amethyst asked in amazement.

"And how long did it take you to make this?" Sapphire asked, looking longingly at the lei.

"Uh, it's been a work in progress for er... pretty much all my life," he admitted with a blush. "I've been inspired recently. So! How about combining the two and having dolphins with sunglasses and leis?" he quickly moved on before anyone could comment on that. "And then we can start figuring out a guest list so we know how many we need to get printed."

"Well, we should definitely invite Greg," Ruby said at once.

"And your Uncle Andy," Amethyst added with a smirk. "Seeing how much he likes weddings."

"And Connie and her family," Pearl suggested brightly.

"And..." Peridot trailed off as she realized how limited the remaining options were. "You guys took all the good ones," she grumbled.

There was a moment of gloomy silence and then Steven snapped his fingers. "What about Lapis?" he asked brightly. "I'm sure she'd love to come!"

Pearl looked doubtful. "Really? I just mean, she's not exactly... sociable," she quickly clarified as Steven's face fell.

"She might not come, but... she'd like to be invited," Sapphire spoke up.

"Oh, Peridot can deliver the invitation," Amethyst said at once. "In person. They need to talk anyway, right, P-dot?"

"Wrong," Peridot said with a scowl.

"Why, what's up?" Steven asked, watching the exchange with trepidation.

"It's personal," Amethyst said simply. "Plus... y'know."

Steven stared blankly at her for a few seconds, then his eyes widened. "Oh. Shi- heck," he quickly corrected himself as Pearl looked sharply at him. "Um, yeah, I guess we kinda need to tell her what's been going on."

"I'll go and find out where she is," Peridot said with resignation, and disappeared into her room to find her tablet.

Steven stared down at the page full of dolphin invitation designs for a moment longer, and then turned and followed her. There was an unpleasant, swooping feeling in the pit of his stomach now. During the excitement of wedding prep, he'd almost somehow managed to forget why Ruby and Sapphire were getting married. Now he had to break the news to Lapis. And he had a sinking feeling she wasn't going to take it very well either.

Peridot was scowling down at her tablet screen, but forced her features into a more neutral expression when she spotted him. "According to her blog, she's planning to visit The Butts Farm tomorrow. I'll send her a message and ask her if we can join her."

"She's gonna freak out, isn't she?" Steven said glumly.

Peridot paused, mid-message, and then sighed. She would've liked to assure Steven that everything would be fine, but she knew Lapis too well for that. "There's a strong possibility that she'll react badly to the news, yes," she admitted. "We should probably plan how we intend to tell her before we meet up with her."

"Ughhh." Once again, he thought longingly of Garnet's handy forehead kisses. It would've been so useful to know in advance what phrasing would work best. "Maybe we should give her the good news first," he mused aloud. "To soften the blow. Or maybe we should tell her the bad news first," he immediately contradicted himself. "And then give her the good news to distract her."

"No." Peridot shook her head at once. "We should give her the good news – I assume you mean the wedding? We should give her that news first," she said after he nodded in confirmation. "Then the next logical step is to explain why they're getting married. It will make the subject flow more naturally, as opposed to simply dumping the news upon her with no warning."

Plus she had a feeling that if they tried to tell Lapis that Ruby and Sapphire's wedding was good news after telling her the war that had resulted in her five thousand years of imprisonment had basically all been faked, Lapis would tear up the invitation and throw it in their faces. She might still do it anyway, but at least this way, it would be clear from the start that Ruby and Sapphire had been victims of Pink Diamond's deception too.

"OK... wedding invitation first. Maybe I should make notes." He looked around and then snatched up a piece of scrap paper. "Not like a whole speech or anything, just, y'know, points to remember."

"That's a good idea," Peridot said with approval. "Especially as this is a discussion you'll probably have several more times in the upcoming weeks. It would be useful to have a list of the pertinent points to refer to- ah!" She sat up straighter, missing the grimace on her boyfriend's face. "She says we can meet her there tomorrow at ten. Is that her time or ours?" she muttered under her breath and started typing again.

"Is it such a good idea to tell her there?" Steven asked, immediately distracted from the gloomy prospect of repeating his story to even more gems. "Maybe we should go somewhere less public. Maybe even the desert."

Peridot paused again and mulled over the possible pros and cons. "No, I think it would better to do it there. It's a location she's chosen, and it might remind her that she never would've been allowed to do this sort of self-indulgent traveling back on Homeworld. Although yes, you're right, it shouldn't be in public. But it's a farm," she added brightly. "There's bound to be a deserted field we can go to talk to her."

xxx

Ten in the morning, Lapis time, had turned out to be five in the morning their time, so Peridot had negotiated a later time, using the argument that Steven needed to sleep. Technically, it was true. In reality, he woke up on Peridot's sofa again, two hours earlier than necessary. With the door still open and the clear sound of movement in the house beyond, they didn't dare indulge in anything more than a few kisses, but still, it was a nice way to start the day. His brain immediately spoiled it all by pointing out that it wasn't going to last.

That sobering thought drove him out from under the covers and into the house, where Ruby and Sapphire were still pouring over his wedding scrapbook. "Ah, Steven!" Ruby exclaimed, bouncing to her feet. "What d'ya think, cupcake tower or traditional?" she asked, holding the book out towards him.

"Uh..." He took a quick step back so that he could get a better look at the page and then smiled wryly to himself when he realized the traditional one was a geode-style one, similar to the one from his corruption dream. Pretty though it was, it had definitely lost its appeal. "It's your wedding though, it's really not up to me though," he began diplomatically.

"We'd appreciate your opinion in this matter," Sapphire said sweetly. "I'm rather fond of the cupcakes, but Ruby prefers the more traditional approach."

"Just look at it, Saphy!" Ruby looked down at the page with almost as much longing as she looked at her fiancee. "It's so pretty! And we could customize it blue and red, to look like us!"

"Mmm," Sapphire said vaguely, and Steven shot her a look, suddenly wondering if her future vision had shown her his true feelings towards the geode cake. Did she even really like the cupcakes? She'd always seemed fairly old-fashioned and traditional to him, had she just picked the cupcakes because she'd known he'd prefer them? Or did she think he'd work out that she was using her future vision and then side with Ruby to prove her wrong? Or was she being deliberately contrary on some level to deal with the discovery that she'd been following the orders of another Diamond for thousands of years?

Maybe she really did just like the cupcakes. He honestly couldn't tell.

"Well... they both have their good points," he began diplomatically. "Cupcakes are good 'cause you can make sure you have the same number as the number of guests, so nothing gets wasted, and everyone gets the same amount of cake, plus you can customize them more. But," he continued as Sapphire smirked over at her fiancee, "you can't really do the traditional cake cutting with cupcakes. And a traditional cake is good if you're not sure about your guest numbers, 'cause you can cut bigger or smaller pieces-"

"Why don't you just get both?" Amethyst interrupted, popping up behind him and making him jump.

"It would cost an additional five hundred dollars to get both," Sapphire said bluntly.

"So? It's not like Greg can't afford it," she pointed out.

"Yeah, but he just spent a million dollars on hospital fees," Ruby butted in. "So we don't feel right asking for more than we have to."

"A million!?" Amethyst's mouth dropped open. "Dude! How!? All you did was sleep!"

"Lion blasted that thingy, remember?" Steven muttered self-consciously and quickly moved the topic on. "So just out of curiosity, does dad actually know he's paying for this?"

"He offered," Ruby said happily. "It's our wedding present."

"Oh, right, presents!" Amethyst snapped her fingers. "Do you guys have a registry set up yet?"

"No?" Ruby looked blankly at her. "I mean, what would we even ask for?"

"Household equipment," Peridot piped up from the kitchen, where she'd been gathering snacks with half an ear on the conversation. "So the couple can set up a new home together."

"Oh yes, I remember that one," Sapphire said with glee. "Percy, Pierre..."

"And seventeen toaster ovens!" Ruby finished.

"Not gonna ask," Amethyst muttered under her breath. Then she spoke again in her usual tone. "OK, yes, we don't need any of that, but people are gonna want to buy you gifts, so you might as well set up a list somewhere of stuff you want."

"But we don't need anything..." Ruby began.

Amethyst held up a hand to stop her. "I didn't say 'need.' I said 'want.'"

Ruby and Sapphire exchanged open-mouthed looks. Clearly this was a distinction that hadn't occurred to them, and they huddled together and began to discuss their options in hushed tones. Mildly ominous words such as 'turbo,' 'massive' and ' flamethrower' drifted over towards the others, who all privately decided they were better off not knowing. "I'm gonna go and get Lion," Steven announced, leaning over Peridot to grab one of Lion's ice creams he kept especially for bribing the animal. "Then shall we get going?"

"Yes, I believe I've packed adequate supplies," Peridot agreed, zipping up Steven's old cheeseburger backpack before slipping the straps over her shoulders.

"Great, let's go!" He grabbed her hand and gave the other gems a wave. "Bye guys, we'll see you later!"

A chorus of farewells escorted them out of the house and down to the beach. Underneath the decking, Lion was curled up, apparently asleep, but one eye cracked open at the sound of the crinkling of ice cream wrappers, and a few moments later, they were hurtling through the portal that lead to The Butts Farm.

Lapis was pacing back and forth in front of a tractor, and flew several feet in the air with a shriek as Lion suddenly appeared and skidded to a halt exactly where she'd been standing. "Steven! " she cried, retaining her composure and pulling him in for a fond hug.

Peridot coughed pointedly.

"And Peridot," the other gem added with a small laugh. "So what's up? You said you had some news for me?"

"Uh…" Steven hadn't anticipated being asked that question so quickly and glanced over at Peridot for help. "It's nothing urgent, it can wait," he lied. "Let's check out this farm first. So! Butts Farm! What's the story there?"

The smile slid off Lapis's face. "What's going on?" she asked warily. "What's the news?" Her eyes widened in alarm. "Is it Jasper? You cured Jasper, didn't you!?"

"What? No!" Steven waved his arms frantically.

"We haven't tried using the song on anyone yet, let alone Jasper," Peridot added, trying to keep the exasperation out of her voice. "We've been busy with the Cluster."

"Oh." Lapis relaxed and smiled again. "How did it go?" She bounced up and down on tiptoe for a few seconds. "Feels pretty solid… so I'm guessing the planet didn't blow up."

"Nope!" Peridot instantly forgot her exasperation and puffed up with pride. "Oh, you should've seen Steven," she bragged, flinging her arms around him. "He was magnificent! He made contact with the Cluster to calm it down, and then transported it perfectly to its new location!"

"Aheh." Steven smiled self-consciously. "It wasn't just me," he quickly added. "I never could've done it without my ground crew. And, of course, my lovely pilot."

They exchanged soppy looks until Lapis loudly cleared her throat. "Well aren't you two adorable," she said dryly. "If that's all, shall we go in?"

The soppy looks turned wary. "Actually... that's not the news," Steven reluctantly admitted, releasing his hold on Peridot.

Lapis tilted her head. "Then what-"

"Ruby and Sapphire are getting married!" Peridot blurted out. She forced a wide, cheerful smile onto her face as Lapis stared at her, and hoped it looked convincing. "Yay!"

Steven took the backpack from Peridot and quickly rummaged through the contents. "Here," he said, handing over the garish invitation. "They'd really like it if you could be there."

"Married?" Lapis took the invitation and looked at it in confusion. "That's that thing your Uncle Andy talked about, isn't it?"

"Ye-es," Steven said carefully.

"But... I thought it was a human thing?" she asked. "That's what you said when we brought that wedding cake to get married with."

"Ahah. Yes." He felt a beat of sweat roll down his face. "Um, the thing is..."

Something brushed against his hand, and he looked down to see Peridot's fingers wrap around his own, reminding him that he wasn't alone in this, and with newfound determination, he raised his eyes to meet Lapis's. "We found out mom had been lying about something pretty big for a long time. Something so big, Garnet split up over it."

"Garnet split up?" Lapis took a step back. Suddenly she wasn't sure she wanted to know this news after all. No, she definitely didn't want to know this news. Unfortunately for her, Steven was determined to finish talking and she didn't quite dare stick her fingers in her ears and go "la la la."

"They spent a couple of days apart, just processing it," Steven carried on relentlessly. "Then they talked and... well, decided they wanted to get back together on their own terms, by having a wedding."

"That's great!" Lapis pasted a wide, fake smile on her face. "Tell them I said congratulations! But I don't think I'm going to be able to make it, what a shame. Let's go visit the farm now!" And she spun around and strode towards the entrance.

"Lapis, please!" Peridot called after her. "This is important!"

Lapis paused and considered her options for a few moments. Running away was a deeply tempting one; mostly because she could fly and they couldn't. She could probably get a fair distance away before they caught up. But then, they would catch her eventually. Peridot was too stubborn not to. All she'd be doing was delaying the inevitable. Probably not by much, she gloomily concluded when she belated remembered they had Lion with them too. What would be the point in running away when they could just open a portal to her hiding place? And so she turned around and stomped back towards them. "All right, fine, tell me," she snapped. "Get it over with. What did Rose do? Let me guess." She thought wildly for something ridiculous, just to try and lighten the horrible, oppressive atmosphere that had fallen between them and prove she wasn't scared. "She created the Cluster."

To her immense dismay, instead of immediately laughing in her face and denying the accusation, they exchanged uncertain looks. "Oh come on! You're joking!" she burst out. "She didn't really, did she!?"

"No! No." Peridot shook her head. "I'm relatively certain she didn't have a hand in creating the Cluster."

"Well that's reassuring," Lapis said sarcastically.

"But... she might have known," Steven said, looking troubled.

Lapis shook her head. "But... how? How could she have known!?"

"I don't think she knew for certain," Peridot said, more to Steven than Lapis. "She may have heard rumors..."

"...But she wouldn't have let herself believe it," Steven finished. "Not when they-"

"When you're quite finished, are either of you going to actually tell me what's going on!?" Lapis interrupted furiously.

Steven flushed. "Sorry. I just hadn't considered that until-" He stopped, shook his head and started again. "OK. So... Mom, Rose Quartz... she wasn't who we thought she was. She was Pink Diamond. She disguised herself as a Rose Quartz and faked her own death," he explained steadily.

"So you see," Peridot interjected, "we've just realized she may have heard something about the Cluster project from the other Diamonds-"

"She knew," Lapis breathed.

"Well like I said, I don't think she knew for certain..." Peridot trailed off as clouds gathered overhead and thunder rumbled ominously. "Uh..."

"She knew!" Lapis clenched her fists and began to pace back and forth. "She was- she was there! And she- she was there and she saw and she knew all along!"

"What?" Steven tilted his head in confusion. "How do you know she-"

"I have to go," Lapis said abruptly, and before either of them could say a word to stop her, she unfurled her wings and shot up through the clouds like a rocket. A few seconds later, the clouds began to clear and sunlight shone upon them.

"OK..." Steven frowned up at the sky and shook his head in confusion. "That was weird. What did she mean, mom knew about the Cluster?"

Peridot bit her lip. Her logical mind was putting together the pieces and they weren't making a very pretty picture of Rose Quartz. "I don't think she was talking about the Cluster. I could be wrong though," she hastily added, then immediately realized that would be worse. "I mean, I don't think she had anything to do with the Cluster either, I could be wrong about this other thing, Lapis didn't exactly elaborate."

"Right." Steven nodded slowly and then shook his head. "Sorry, I'm lost. What other thing?"

"I mean..." Peridot paused and glanced back up at the sky. "I think what Lapis was trying to say is that Pink Diamond was there. When she was put in the mirror."

Steven's eyes widened. "So when Pearl found it and showed it to mom..."

"She would've known at once that Lapis was a sentient gem, trapped in there," Peridot finished.

"Oh geez." Steven groaned and dropped his head into his hands. "Poor Lapis. Mom really screwed her over."

It was true, but Peridot didn't like to see him beating himself up about it. "She screwed everybody over," she reminded him. "And I could be wrong about Lapis."

Steven laughed bitterly. "Yeah. But I don't think you are." He sighed and straightened up again. "So what do we do now?"

Peridot shrugged. There was nothing they could do for Lapis until she came back. If she came back. Hopefully she would, once she remembered that Steven had been the one to release her from her prison. And until then...

"We look around Butts Farm," she said firmly, and then she took his hand and began leading him towards the entrance. "Come on. It's been a while since I did any farming, I want to see how they grow the butts."

xxx

A/N: I'm so sorry it's taken so long to update this! I am just not productive during the holidays, I'm afraid. It's time to admit it, the regular posting schedule for this fic has gone out the window. It seems nine chapters is the maximum I can post on a consistent weekly basis. Also on a completely unrelated note, no, I have not seen the movie yet, please don't spoil me!