The moment we entered the school, we were confronted by a hall monitor. He was obviously ginger, with pale skin, bright red hair, and freckles. As soon as he noticed us, he glared, holding up a bat.
"Excuse me, but school is out. No students are allowed on the premises until tomorrow at 7:30 a.m." He glared at Kenny and Butters, well aware of why they were there. However, his expression became friendlier as he looked at me. "You must be the New Kid. Don't follow the examples these guys set." he told me, gesturing to my friends, "They are constant troublemakers."
Kenny and Butters both protested the ginger's words, but I ignored them, approaching the hall monitor and pulling out my dagger, a sinister smirk on my face. "So am I." I thought, slamming my dagger's hilt into the side of the ginger's head, practically throwing him to the ground. The ginger stared at me with terrified eyes, pulling out a walkie-talkie.
"Officer down! Officer down!" he yelled, "I repeat, officer down! All hall monitors to the right hallway!" I took the walkie-talkie from the "fallen officer", kicking him away before he could say anymore. On the other end, I heard Mr. Mackey's response.
"Oh, goddammit!" he growled, frustration evident in his voice, even through the speakers. Kenny and Butters crowded around me as we heard Craig's response.
"Heeeere they come." he said in his usual monotone.
"They aren't gonna get you, Craig!" Mr. Mackey yelled defiantly, "You're not getting out of detention!"
"I'll be outta here in 10 minutes." came Craig's usual response.
"Oh golly." Butters mumbled, beginning to freak out, "Mr. Mackey knows we're here." Kenny patted Butters' back, attempting to reassure him. I just looked toward the hallway to the right.
10 minutes, huh? Let's see if we can meet that expectation. I signaled for the two blonds to follow me. Butters clung to my arm as we headed in. He seemed to have a fear of getting into trouble. Kenny checked his manicured nails. He was clearly used to getting into trouble. We only got a short way into the hallway before we were stopped by a large pile of chairs.
Well, this proves that the cafeteria is this way. Now how are we going to get past this? Suddenly, I heard laughter.
"Let's see you get past the blockade, intruder!" one of the gingers yelled, while the other one lit a rolled up piece of paper and threw it at us. We all jumped back, and the paper bounced back toward the blockade. That gave me an idea. I signaled for my companions to get back (Kenny didn't understand me, but Butters did, and he pulled Kenny back), and then I approached the burning piece of paper, preparing Dragonshout.
"Bring it on, New Kid!" one of the hall monitors challenged me, laughing at my apparent inferiority. That's when I turned around and unleashed Dragonshout on the open flame, blowing up the blockade and sending the hall monitors guarding it flying.
"Woohoo! Way to go, Douchebag!" Butters cheered at Kenny burst out laughing. I simply signaled for them to follow me as I made my way past the destroyed barrier. We soon came up to the cafeteria, and I listened as I heard Mr. Mackey yell from the other side, "You're not getting in here, m'kay? I've hidden the key somewhere, and you'll never find it in my office!" I smirked as I heard snickering on the other side of the door, followed by a frustrated. "Oh, damn it!"
"His office, huh?" I thought, turning to Kenny and Butters. They led me to Mr. Mackey's office, but it was locked. I growled, making both Kenny and Butters back away from me, eyeing my movements warily (they had both seen me in battle, so they knew I was dangerous), and leading Butters to suggest that we check some other rooms. We ventured further into the school, knocking out more ginger hall monitors (it would seem that ALL of the hall monitors were ginger). As we continued walking, Kenny and Butters began discussing another event in their past, this time making fun of Cartman. I heard something about Cartman joining NAMBLA (North American Man-Boy Love Association) and nearly getting several boys raped before I tuned them out, cringing at the thought.
As we kept walking, with Kenny and Butters a short distance ahead of me, I noticed something they didn't. Around the corner, a group of ginger hall monitors were waiting in ambush. I stopped, readying the bow that I had gotten from Jimbo and Ned. As the gingers moved in, I kicked a locker, gaining my companions' attention. As they stopped, the gingers charged, but before they could get to my friends, I shot one of the fluorescent lights hanging from the ceiling, taking down all of the attackers at once. Kenny and Butters stared at me, mouths open in awe. I gave them both a scolding look, and although Butters was the only one who understood me enough to bow his head in apology, Kenny soon followed the other blond's example, bowing his head and apologizing as well. I just nodded in acceptance, continuing my journey through the school, with Kenny and Butters both following close behind me, weapons out and alert.
As I turned the corner, I heard a kid screaming behind another locked door. I also noticed that there was another blockade on the other side of the hallway. Knowing that I would need a key to get into the room, I headed for the blockade. There were several gingers on the other side of the blockade, guarding it. They mocked me, challenging me to get through. The leader approached me, waving a key in my face.
"You can pry this brass key from my cold, dead hands." he gloated, moving to the back of the hallway behind the blockade, practically oozing confidence. I stepped back, examining the barrier, looking for a way in. This barrier was more sophisticated than the last one I had to deal with. Instead of just a pile of chairs, it was a fence on wheels, which many buildings tended to have.
Hm. No open flames, so Dragonshout won't do much. Neither my dagger, nor my bow can get through it. That's when Kenny stepped up to me, snapping me out of my thoughts. As I looked at him, he kneeled in front of me, bowing his head and saying, "Your word is my command, my lord."
I looked at Kenny questioningly, not quite sure what he was asking. He looked up at me, as if waiting for me to do something, so I just pointed to one of the ginger kids. Kenny nodded in response, and I'm sure he was smirking as he approached the blockade, calling out to the ginger I had indicated and…wait a minute…is he showing off his nipples?! What's that going to do?! He doesn't even have breasts!
However, it would seem that I was the ONLY one not affected. Butters had turned away in embarrassment while the ginger I had pointed to was approaching the gate, drooling.
"Whoa, what have we got here?" he said, dazed, "Ooh, boobies!" He rushed over, removing the blockade so he could get to Kenny, chanting "Must touch. Must touch." Kenny just giggled, taking out a mirror and hitting the ginger over the head, knocking him out. I shook my head slightly as the princess bowed to me, entering the previously-blockaded area. I looked at Butters, who just shrugged, before returning to the task at hand. The lead hall monitor has a brass key, which I must need to get into the cafeteria, which means that I must get that key at all costs.
I looked at the barricade that lay past the gate. There were four gingers behind it, but they didn't seem to want to chase me, preferring for me to come to them. I held my arm out, telling my companions to stand back. I spotted a bulletin board near two of the gingers. My arrows took care of the bulletin board, bringing the gingers down with it. That left only two opponents, who I just left to Kenny and Butters (they were getting restless). When the leader fell, I took the brass key from him, glaring at him as he pulled out his walkie-talkie.
"More officers down! We're taking heavy casualties out here!" he cried into the speaker. Mr. Mackey's voice could be heard on the other end.
"Damn it! You hall monitors need to stop playing around!" he yelled. The ginger looked frantic.
"He's got the brass key! He's some kind of Dragonborn!"
I flinched. That name again… With that, I snatched the walkie-talkie from his hands, just in time to hear Mr. Mackey say, "Now look, this is detention time, not time to play Dungeons & Dragons! And besides, he's never gonna get inside here because to open the door you need to gold key, and the only way to get the gold key is by getting the silver key, m'kay, and even if he has the brass key, he still hasn't made it past the boss level! M'kay?"
M'kay. I turned off the walkie-talkie, the shadow of my hood covering my eyes as a grin pulled at my lips. The ginger shuddered at the sight. Thanks for the info, Mackey.
I looked at my companions, my expression showing no signs of the sadistic pleasure displayed not a second before, and pointed my finger toward the room that the screams were coming from. They both nodded, following me as I headed in that direction. From behind me, I heard Butters whisper to Kenny, "I think Douchebag doesn't like being called "Dragonborn"."
"Really?" Kenny asked, surprised.
"Well, yeah." Butters replied, "I mean, gee whiz, Kenny, didn't you see that dark aura that surrounded him when that ginger kid called him "some sort of Dragonborn"? And when Eric called him a Dragonborn, I swear I saw him shudder." Kenny was astonished. And so was I.
I can't believe he can really see so far into my emotions. No one's ever been able to tell what I was feeling before, much less so accurately. I should probably keep him around as much as possible, at least while interacting with others. Still, how does he do it?
Choosing to focus on the mission, I unlocked the door and entered the other room. Once inside, we were greeted by several more gingers, blockades, and in the back, a kid crying, several suction-cup arrows stuck to his back.
"Great. More people in trouble." I thought sarcastically, "And look, another barricade. Are those fireworks?"
I blinked a couple of times, wondering why there were fireworks just lying around in an elementary school, before shrugging and setting them off with one of my arrows. One of them hit a ginger, who stood behind a barricade made from two tables, breaking it. Another firework hit one of the gingers that was attacking the kid, knocking him out, and the last one set the last barricade on fire, allowing me to blow it apart with Dragonshout. I then shot a pile of books, wiping out the last ginger kid and allowing my group to approach to kid. His injuries weren't serious, a few little scrapes, but his crying still looked pathetic, so I commanded Butters to "heal" him.
"Thanks. I thought I was a goner." the kid said to me and my companions, "There were too many of them. They were too strong. Their hair, too red." He then took a silver key from his pocket and handed it to me. "Maybe you can take this silver key and find the gold key. You can succeed where I have failed! Free Mackey's prisoners!" he yelled as he ran out the door. I just nodded, looking to my friends.
"Hey, uh, that's the silver key, right, fellas?" Butters asked us. Kenny nodded.
"Yeah. That key unlocks Mackey's lair." he told us. I found that hanging around Kenny for an extended period of time makes him easier to understand. I turned around, heading back to Mr. Mackey's office.
After unlocking the door, I entered a room that was filled with cabinets and drawers. There was a desk in the middle of the room with two chairs in front of it. And on a shelf above the desk was the gold key. I arched an eyebrow, shooting down the key and catching it. That was easy.
"The gold key!" Butters gasped in wonder, "No human has ever laid hands on it before."
I arched my eyebrow again, this time at Butters. "Then how did you guys break Craig out of detention last time?" Not that I really bothered to ask, since, by the look on Kenny's face, I could surmise that Butters was exaggerating.
Now, with the gold key in my possession, I headed for the cafeteria. It'd been about 8 minutes since we first showed up, and I intended to stay on the schedule that Craig had set for us. However, before I could open the door, an older hall monitor stopped me.
"Hey!" he called out, making me turn to face him. He looked to be in fifth or sixth grade. His bright red hair was in a buzz-cut style and he was wearing dark brown armor with a silver badge on his left shoulder. The sash that read "hall monitor" was gray, rather than white like the others, indicating how long it had been in use. His face was covered with freckles.
"Where's your hall pass?" he asked, the unspoken challenge not lost one me, "No hall pass, huh? Then it's time to give you a referral!" He then pulled out a stick with a dodgeball attached to it by a string.
"Oh yeah! That's the boss! Good luck fightin' the boss! You still think this is a game, young man!" Mr. Mackey yelled through the door, before having to silence the cheers from the students in detention, who were supporting me.
I took out my dagger, always preferring close combat. The boss summoned two other hall monitors, but Kenny and Butters intercepted them, forcing him to face me alone. I lunged, striking him with a full-force attack and knocking him back. He glared at me, swinging the dodgeball, which I blocked. After checking to make sure my friends were okay, I pulled out another knife, which I had upgraded to a scythe-like dagger, and snuck around the older ginger, inflicting a deep wound in his side. He cringed and fell to one knee, before pulling out his phone and threatening to call my parents. I narrowed my eyes and Dragonshouted in his face, making him drop the phone, which I then crushed under my foot. The boss swore at me and swung the dodgeball again, but I jumped out of the way, stunning him with a kick to the head before slashing him again with my dagger. With that final attack, the boss collapsed, succumbing to the bleeding. Once the boss fell, I looked to my companions, only to see them applauding me, the two other gingers lying defeated at their feet. I smirked, opening the door and freeing the students. They all cheered and took off, with me, Kenny, Butters, and Craig close behind them. Behind us, I could hear Mr. Mackey yelling in frustrated defeat.
"Damn you, Craig!"