A/N: Hello friends :) I'm back! I had a bunch of exams and observed clinics I had to get through, so sorry I've been gone a while. This is a bit of a weird chapter as I started it meaning to pretty much go into the scene this ends on, but I realised that I wanted to get some of this out into the open before it became bottled up and potentially problematic later. So, yes... I meant to come to you with smut, and have instead come to you with conversation... oops! More to come this week though, so hopefully everyone is happy! Thanks for sticking with me, and reviews would be awesome!

"It's very weird throwing clothes in the hamper that are more or less imaginary."

Emma muses as she reenters the living area to find the brunette sat where she'd left her warming herself in front of the fire after confirming that she meant to stay.

"Why put them in the laundry at all?"

Regina frowns, using a metal poker to better arrange the logs.

"I wasn't sure what else to do. I guess they'll disappear after a while if I conjured them, right? If I stop thinking about them, they'll just vanish?"

The blonde asks curiously as she ducks into the kitchen to fetch the darker woman's wine.

"Probably. I can't speak for how it works for... You."

Regina trails off as Emma walks over. Dark eyes lower thoughtfully to drink in pale skin, before rising back up to meet green.

"Cute."

The Mayor remarks of the blonde's change of clothes; pyjama shorts, a thin sweater and thick socks. She is surprised by Emma's choice, having picked Henry up enough times in the morning before the Sheriff has gotten herself dressed to know she rarely opts for anything so flattering. She imagines the blonde has made a little effort on her account in more ways than one. After all, she has forgone drowning herself in one of the seemingly infinite sweaters she owns that come almost to her knees in favour of soft wool cut above her hips. She's also dressed herself in soft hues of green and grey- wool and linen- a notable departure from how she's presented herself over the last few days, and from the weighted look she offers as she sets the wine and glass on the table, it would seem her choice of attire is purposeful.

We're both free to be all versions of ourselves, and it's going to take some getting used to, but it's a good thing.

A very good thing.

Regina decides as she watches the Sheriff fetch a bottle of scotch and a tumbler from the cabinet beneath the window.

"If you're jealous, you can borrow something."

Emma offers as she takes a seat beside the Mayor.

"Jealous?"

"You were staring."

The blonde calls her out bluntly, and Regina studies her over the rim of her wine glass before insisting haughtily

"I think I'll pass on the offer to share, dear."

"Suit yourself."

Emma shrugs, and the brunette watches her throat work as she sips at her scotch, supposing she's still openly staring, but unable to see much of a problem with this.

Especially after the intimacy of Miss Swan's earlier inspection.

Feeling pleasant heat creep up her throat and warm her stomach, she simply smiles when the younger woman glances at her sharply.

"What?"

Emma challenges, and Regina shakes her head, opting for silence.

"...On second thoughts, I take back my offer."

The younger woman muses with a smirk, and when the Mayor asks her why she's had a change of heart, she mimics the latter's appreciative study.

"It's been a while since you've dressed this way. I'd hate to cramp your style."

"Mm."

Regina agrees with a soft blush colouring her cheeks, not at all surprised that the Sheriff has noticed what she had been contemplating earlier, nor that the blonde is in favour.

How could she not be?

"I like it."

Emma states simply, confirming the darker woman's inner musing, and Regina laughs quietly and challenges

"Are you saying you've found my more recent choices unfavourable?"

"That depends. How recent are we talking?"

The Sheriff grins, before catching a flicker of something other than playful flirtation dancing behind the brunette's calm demeanour, and she falls uneasily silent.

"How do you feel?"

She asks finally, and Regina frowns as she considers the rich hue of her malbec.

"Are you going to keep asking me that?"

She sighs, and Emma pulls a face as she admits awkwardly

"I mean, probably! It's just weird, you know? You looking at me the way you are now when I know there's parts of you that can't fucking stand me."

"Oh, you're well-accustomed to my 'I can't stand you' face, dear, and it predates recent events significantly."

Regina rolls her eyes.

"No."

"No?! Did you think my expression while attempting to drive you from my town by means of threat and intended homicide was one of fondness?"

"Of course not... But it wasn't the same way you looked at me when you were the Queen- just the Queen- and, that's still in you."

"Miss Swan, we just-"

"-I know what we just, Regina. I'm not saying I'm surprised or concerned, or anything like that. It only struck me because I don't think you've ever looked at me how you are now. It's nice. It's just new. And a bit of a head-fuck after the last few days where you looked at me in a very different way."

"Well, I can stop if you'd prefer? It may well happen of its own accord if we carry on with this conversation."

The brunette snaps.

"It's alright, there's already a hint of irritation creeping in. I'm no stranger to that look."

Emma grins, before giving up and frowning down at her whisky, wondering if she should have just kept quiet.

Not really my style...

Fortunately, it seems her musing hasn't gotten her into too much trouble as Regina simply mulls her words over and gives them some thought.

"...I don't think it's that strange that I would look at you in a new way when what happened tonight is new."

"I guess not. I guess I was just expecting it might have gone the other way. I'm not used to us fucking and you not wanting to kill me afterwards... Or during."

The blonde tacks on honestly, and the Mayor chuckles quietly and warns

"That could still happen... I am all of the parts you've encountered and more."

"And more?!"

Emma raises a brow as she reads the darker woman's revelation as teasing arrogance, but Regina swiftly insists on its truth.

"I'm more than just the Mayor and the Queen... I'm both, but I'm also another part that didn't exist before pulling those conflicting entities apart and melding them together again. How could I not be?"

"Hm... You're going to need really big business cards at this rate."

"Hush. You know what I mean. Both parts of my persona woke up and had to decide how to feel about things after you left, Emma. At first, it felt as though my mind was trying to push two magnets together that naturally needed to oppose one another. I took the Evil Queen back with the hope I would be able to control her, but that's not really how it all works as it turns out. I woke up with new knowledge- new memories- of what had happened between us, and I had to put those things together in a way where I could make sense of them and process both your actions and mine. To do that, I had to find it in myself to understand what happened and why you made the choices you did. Choices about things we've never discussed or encountered before. Big choices. There's a lot to digest in the madness of the last few days; some of it I'm angry about, some of it I understand. I've learned new things about you and about myself, so the way that I look at you is going to be different."

Regina shrugs, before pointing out,

"It's not just me, dear. This time, the darkness in you; it was different. You'd never looked at me that way before- the way you looked at me after my little memory trick- and so I'd never had to deal with how that might make me feel. It was new. I've lost count of the things I've done in the past to hurt you- to anger you- and your reaction is usually just infuriatingly frustrating to me."

The brunette laughs softly.

"I grew up with the understanding that fury was a spectacle. That hurt feelings were a dramatic display to keep all those involved entertained for the best part of a decade. Not you, though. Your irritation is generally fairly mellow. Your hurt feelings are often expressed as silence. You choose to distance yourself rather than engaging, and that has always irked me something rotten!... But, suddenly, that wasn't the case. I experienced a different side of you over there, Emma, the same as you did of me. With my memories patchworking everything together into one conscience, it goes beyond what I can understand of your actions in retaliation to any one slight... You chose to help me, in spite of everything I'd done to you over the last few days, and I chose to come here tonight and play things as I did in spite of discovering everything you'd done to me. On top of that, we've finally removed the veil of pretence that we've spent several years perfecting now, so I would hope that we might see each other a little differently from before!"

"Well, when you put it that way..."

Emma concedes, and the Mayor smirks, before noting that she's alone in her amusement.

"What is it?"

She asks, hoping that the blonde isn't about to say something stupid to ruin her mood.

"Emma?"

"It's just... You say you have all your memories. That they've all come together as one."

"So?"

"So... Do you still have mine?"

The Sheriff shoots her a guarded glance before looking back down at her near-empty glass, and Regina sighs as she sinks back against the cushions and closes her eyes.

"Sort of. Snapshots. It was more a feeling at the time; feeling what you felt and pushing you back into that headspace. I captured snippets of moments that will have meant far more to you than they ever could to me. I wanted to pry, to get you back for the diary, but I didn't know when or where to start, so I just opted for everything. Every bad thing... I understood most of it, but it was hazy in a way. Some parts were clear, some less so. Now, I have memories of my memories of your memories and it's hazier still... I wish I didn't. I'm sorry, truly, I am. Just know I'll never mention any of what I saw; not to anyone else, and not to you... Although..."

Opening one eye, she offers the Sheriff a wince.

"What?"

Emma growls.

"Well... What I saw, dear, it wasn't chronological."

"Okay? Sorry that's how your fucked up spell worked?"

The blonde hisses tersely, and Regina places a hand on her arm and elaborates uncomfortably

"All I meant by that was that my meddling didn't cut off at a certain point in time when the spell broke."

"When I broke."

Emma corrects, and the darker woman nods as she admits solemnly,

"I really did think that was what happened at the time."

"You were pretty jazzed about it, too."

"Yes, well..."

Regina clears her throat, splaying her palms lamely to suggest this shouldn't come as a surprise. Accepting her stony audience isn't in the mood to find humour in her teasing, she continues before she loses her nerve.

"I understood the gist of most of what I saw as I know things about you and about how you grew up. To say I was expecting a lot of what I gleaned is perhaps a little forward, but I know your past is something you keep guarded, and so that's where I was expecting my meddling to take me... It did, for the most part, and again, I'm sorry, but there was this one memory... This one brief image that was here."

"And that surprises you?!"

Emma laughs coldly, and the brunette thins her lips as she shakes her head.

"Of course not. We've been through hell here- literally, as it happens- and I expected some of that to come up. You've had loved ones die, or almost die. You've been through it, I know that better than most as I was right there with you most of the time... This wasn't a death, though. It wasn't something that happened to Henry, or anything to do with your parents. It was just you. Just you in your car."

"Okay?"

"It was you, in your car, outside of my house... You know what I'm talking about, you saw what I saw."

Regina sighs.

"They're my memories."

The blonde replies woodenly, and the Mayor nods in agreement, wishing the younger woman would either look at her or look away, as the way that Emma currently looks past her is incredibly unsettling.

"You were crying outside of my house. Really crying."

"I was probably really upset."

The younger woman reasons unhelpfully, and the brunette rolls her eyes and tightens her grip on the Sheriff's arm in hopes of getting an explanation out of her.

"Alright, but why? It seemed like just an ordinary day. It didn't seem as though you were worried, or needed to sort something out... It didn't seem as though anyone was in peril, in other words, or you wouldn't have been sat there taking a break."

"Is that not allowed?"

"In the fact that it was stored with the context of everything else I'd gleaned- all of your worst memories- it seemed out of place!"

The Mayor exclaims, and Emma sighs as she tops up her glass and considers the amber liquid pensively.

"Regina, I no more wanted to give you the satisfaction of letting you know when you really got to me than you would have given me the satisfaction of admitting you were wrong back in the day. That doesn't mean that you didn't get to me. You say I'm mellow and distant and whatever else, that doesn't mean I don't care when someone makes it their life's work to throw barbed comments my way. You were ridiculous sometimes back then, back before we quit with being so fucking stubborn towards one another, but it was all the time, and nothing was off the table for you. You would make cruel comments about any subject under the sun in hopes that something might stick. You could be just so venomous towards me- towards anyone you were pissed at- and most of the time it was either just irritating or slightly amusing. But, sometimes you would hit that sweet spot you were aiming for. Sometimes you really would make me question myself, and once or twice, I really did feel about myself all those things you were saying I should... Not a lot of people can get to me the way you manage to- in so many senses!- and that day, I just couldn't cope with it anymore. It wasn't this big event or crisis like the rest of what you saw, but it was just a moment where I felt utterly miserable being here, and I couldn't figure out if by 'here' that meant Storybrooke, around Henry, or just, around."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't apologise. You don't even know what it was you said."

"I know, but-"

"-Seriously, leave it."

Emma warns, but when she senses that the tension between them is swiftly growing teeth, she leans forward to reach for the wine bottle and tops up the brunette's glass for her in a silent bid for peace.

"Thank you."

Regina speaks up quietly, before offering her own version of a truce.

"I kept those diaries to remind myself there was some good in my life."

"Huh?"

"The diaries I kept as a girl. You asked me why on earth I might choose to write down such events as I did, and I must admit, my penmanship and fervour are a little mortifying looking back-"

"-Your fervour?"

Emma chuckles, and the Mayor scowls at her, glad to have normality once more restored.

"Mm. I'm not sure what else I would call it."

"Well-"

"-And I really don't think I wish to know what you would call it, Miss Swan."

"Probably not."

The blonde agrees.

"I kept the diaries because my life outside of what they contained was miserable. I kept them to reflect on. Make of that what you will, given the excerpt you decided to pay such close attention to, but it wasn't all like that."

Regina insists with colour darkening her cheeks.

"I kept them because I wanted to control what memories I'd recall with clarity. There was little else that I would wish to relive. Hence, I did not keep a journal when I took the throne."

"A shame, really..."

"And I didn't keep one before that when my conscience was going through the changes that led to everything that happened after my mother did what she did. I didn't wish to write about hidden grief. I didn't wish to write about my time spent forced to adhere to your mother's every bratty whim. And I didn't wish to write about my absolute misery in regards to my upcoming wedding, nor my terror of what might be expected of the wedding night."

The Mayor finishes primly, catching the weighted understanding in the blonde's frown and nodding.

"I've never spoken to anyone about that, nor do I wish to, but... Even whole, I don't find there to be much glee in the prospect of making you miserable, Saviour. At least, not intentionally. I am also fully aware that it isn't in your nature to 'throw barbs' as you put it. Still, I have always had ammunition should I need it when it comes to you. I may not know precisely what was said that day you retreated to your car in such a state to upset you, but I've always known enough to take a stab and hope for blood. Now, I have a veritable arsenal after my brief foray into your thoughts... It's only fair that you have a weapon of your own. A true bet to crush me if you will it. You did well with the diary; that was cruel. But, it was a pleasant event that you ruined all the same."

Regina sighs, watching Emma out of the corner of her eye to try and get a feel for the younger woman's mood now that recent events have been aired out a little. To her relief, it appears her final statement has had the effect she'd hoped it might as the blonde offers her a sly smile and asks innocently

"Are you sure I ruined it?"

"Irreparably so."

"Oh."

"Couldn't you tell?"

The brunette teases, and Emma raises a brow as she points out

"Well, you did banish me rather violently."

"Mm. Not before getting you to say my name."

Regina counters, before admitting silkily

"Coming upon memories like that as my whole self takes the sting out of some of the rest of it... I'm not going to apologise. I'm not in the slightest bit sorry I got you to give in to me like that."

"Yeah, well, now I know part of you isn't going to quit talking to me for the rest of our natural lives, I'm less broken up about it."

The younger woman chuckles.

"You were really worried about that, weren't you?"

The brunette muses.

"Of course I was! I didn't want for you to be upset or grossed out. I told you that already back at the cottage."

"You did, but there's a difference between concern for my feelings and fear that I might not want to talk to you anymore."

"Is there?"

"Mmhmm. You know it, too. You wouldn't know what to do without me in your life, would you dear?. It's very sweet."

Regina smirks cattily.

"I thought you'd finally come around to the fact that I'm really not all that sweet?"

Emma challenges.

"Perhaps I need reminding."

The Mayor counters boldly.

"Perhaps."

The blonde agrees, topping up her glass generously and taking it with her as she beckons for the Queen to follow her upstairs.