Chapter Eighteen:Aid

"It is no small thing, to reach out and touch someone, to offer them aid when no one else would. You are the savior, the light, the water to a parched man in need of kindness. For people require that closeness, that aid, as assuredly as they do sustenance. A spirit lives and dies on the help one receives, and that one offers."

The Outsider –

Another day passed.

It was uneventful for me compared to most. I waited near Emily for the most part, playing the role I'd been given. She was incredible…she had so much going on but she was able to focus on this and try to help the general workers and people in Driscol. Such a change to the empress day dreaming on a throne a few months before now. She had forged herself into a weapon after Delilah had thrown her in a fire…not without help but impressive all the same. How many others would have given up or run away? Certainly, she'd been tempted but here she was, even though this trip was an act she was using it to improve her people, her empire.

I heard everything, but much of it I didn't focus on heavily, only here and there did I offer her a whisper of advice if there were unforeseeable circumstances in the discussions happening. It probably made her seem a bit fickle but it didn't matter, I could communicate with her without people seeing it. She hadn't even realized it. That I was pausing time long enough to whisper to her, and her mind caught up to it when I began it again. It was a trick mixed with magic, but it functioned for what I wanted all the same.

As impressive as Emily was to watch in action, I was glad when the day came to an end, by the end of the evening tomorrow we would be leaving on our ship. I was both glad for it and not, the getting closer to returning things to the natural order. The way they should be. I didn't wish to let go of Emily at the same time, I knew I would still be close to her that I would keep her near but I wouldn't have her in the same aspect as I could with a physical body.

"You've seemed distracted all day." She pointed out as soon as the attendants left the room, leaving us alone. She sat and began to take off her boots, the usual routine she kept when she was done for the day. "Are you all right?"

"There is much to consider." I answered. It was a nearly programmed response, something cryptic and true without offering anything of substance. I wasn't certain how to express to her some of the concerns I had. It was unlike me. The more I stayed in this form the more it was influencing me to act like I would not normally. I didn't like it…I felt less and less like myself as the days continued…and I wanted more and more. Wanted things I couldn't reasonable have…I turned the conversation before she could press me on it. "What of Anton, did you not wish to speak to him before you answered his father?"

Emily rolled her eyes and let out a frustrated tick of her tongue at the subject. "I tried. Anton has been escorting me but outright avoiding the subject of our possible engagement. He seems afraid of it, and that doesn't help at all. Even if I'm going to marry someone not for love, I need someone that can stand up for my people, that has a backbone."

"His fright is justified is it not? He fears for his lover, that his father will have the boy killed regardless of your answer just to keep him controlled." I explained, leaning near Emily and helping her with her boots. Taking her foot to rub it between my fingers, this ability to feel…to touch…I wanted to indulge in it while I could, before everything became muted again by the void.

"Yes, but he doesn't give me the chance to even speak to him. How am I to resolve anything for either of us if I can't present him with my solution?" Emily complained half-heartedly as she closed her eyes a moment at the massage, letting herself enjoy the touch as much as I did offering it.

"I can take you to him, if it will help. You could speak to him now." I suggested. "The Duke is obsessed with this idea…he projects his own loneliness after his wife's death. He believes his son must have a wife, and doesn't understand or want to understand that his son has never felt alone with Nathanial."

"Nathanial?" She asked.

"The lover's name." I explained. "If you refuse, I expect Nathanial's head will roll before our ship is out of the dock. The Duke will believe it's the only way to save his son from being alone, all the while condemning him to it. Humans are confusing."

"Yes, well, that much is true." Emily replied, sighing. She didn't accept immediately because she didn't want to. She wasn't ready to give up her own single station even if she knew it was better for her empire overall. "I suppose I'll have to speak with him since his father wants an answer tomorrow. This ruse of yours, I hope it works."

"If you offer it to him, he'll accept." I assured.

"For someone not omniscient you sure seem to know exactly what will happen." Emily remarked, eyes half-lidded and voice a bit thicker than usual. She wasn't used to someone massaging her feet for her but she didn't seem to mind it.

"One doesn't have to be omniscient to still be able to read people." I reasoned with a small shrug. "If I had the option to remain by your side so easily, I would take it as well."

"Yes, but Anton isn't you." Emily smiled at me all the same for the remark. "Besides, you aren't exactly leaving, and you don't have the same option. Who is projecting now?"

"That is possible." I admitted, though I didn't like the idea. "Though I still remain confident that he'll agree. He'll want us to arrange Nathanial's safety tonight…we'll get little rest again if you speak to him now."

That earned me a small groan of displeasure. "Are you even trying to sell me on this idea? I'm not sure my Empire is worth giving up being spoiled by you."

"There is much more or you I'd like to indulge my Empress, but I agreed to aid you and protect you first and foremost." I replied. I wasn't lying. It was not easy on me either to let go of her, to agree to take her to another person as opposed to staying here with her while I had the time. "On the boat this trip I plan to let you escape exceptionally little from your quarters."

She was blushing at my forward remark, she hadn't expected it. Then, it wasn't like me to make plans in that way. She looked as if she wasn't sure if she wanted to give up on her plan with Anton and just stay here. If she made that choice, and closed the distance between us, I wasn't sure my own patience would hold out. Duty was quite unforgiving at times. I pulled her between the shadows before she could press our attraction to more activity than we could afford right now. I left her at Anton's door, choosing to watch from the darkness unseen.

"Soon…" I whispered, amused at the glare she shot behind her at the comment. Still, she didn't protest further, she knew as well as I did entertaining our desire did nothing to promote the country right now. She knocked on the door, ready to present her case, our case, for a marriage that would function to aid Dunwall and the Empire, no matter how loveless.

Emily –

Not soon enough…

The Outsider's ability to tease me seemed as eternal as he was…I certainly wondered if I wouldn't give up the Empire just to have the time to satisfy my want of him. It was dangerous how much I still wanted to be near him despite everything I'd learned. For all our arguments we continued this enticing dance more strongly than before, circling ever closer to one another. He'd left me on the doorstep of who he claimed would be my future fiancé and I could only think of him and that single word of whispered promise.

I shook my head, forcing myself back to the present. As much as I disliked it right now, the Outsider was right, I couldn't get carried away with him here and now. I had to fix this problem with Anton and the Duke. I had to fix issues for my Empire before indulging in what I wanted myself.

I knocked on the door. Glad that he answered a moment later even with the shocked expression on his face. He looked a moment as though he wanted to shut the door in my face but I moved inside. I couldn't let him avoid this anymore.

"I'm glad you are still awake Anton; do you mind if we speak for a few moments?" Not that I'd left him a choice in the matter.

"Of course, not your highness, I'm just surprised to see you." He stammered only a split second before schooling himself into the representation of politeness. "It seems inappropriate to speak here as opposed to another meeting room. People might…"

"Get the wrong idea." I finished for him. "Yes, but we'll want people to get the wrong idea if what I have in mind is going to work. Please, sit, we can't keep avoiding this discussion, your father wants an answer tomorrow and I have some things I need to ask."

"…" He seemed ready to say something, then thought better and shut his mouth, moving to sit at his desk after I sat on the edge of his bed. His attempts to remain proper were sort of amusing, I suppose he at least was well trained. I smiled at him for it, I knew he was none too pleased with my barging in but he handled it very well.

"Now, it's clear your father wants this to happen and he will demand an answer tomorrow I'm sure you know that too." I started as seriously as I could, my short burst of amusement gone from my face. "I want to do what is best for everyone involved but I need to actually talk to you about this Anton. You have been avoiding the topic since he brought it up at the restaurant but if you are going to be miserable in Dunwall why would I marry you? Do you think I am that sort of person?"

"It is not that your highness, you have been kind during your visit here and it is clear you care about your people." Anton answered. He was avoiding the topic of his lover. Had his father really pushed him to believe that his interest was wrong? Certainly, it wasn't the most politically sound relationship but such things weren't really that uncommon or overly frowned upon in the capital.

"If it is about Nathanial, that doesn't bother me. You can bring your lover with you." I put it out there, we lacked the time to beat about the bush now. He'd avoided me for too long. I heard a chuckle in my ear, the Outsider at least was entertained since no one else was. I wondered how much he'd laugh about this in years to come. Anton's mask had shattered at the mention of his lover, he couldn't stop himself from the slight hang of his jaw, the widening of his eyes at my remarks.

"I like that about you…you can dive in and rip the bandage off just to be done with it. Your ability to unload and disarm the people around you…"

Dammit, the Outsider wasn't making this easier whispering in my ear this time. I didn't mind when his words helped me from making poor decisions about the future but it wasn't as easy when he was purring compliments into my brain. Was he trying to keep me flustered?

"You…know about Nathanial?" Anton's hesitant question brought me back to reality. He was still digesting what I'd said. "Are you serious? You don't mind him? Us? You wouldn't mind bringing him to Dunwall?"

"No, I don't expect us to marry for love." I replied, it was the truth. I had cared about Wyman but that had been unexpected as well. "I won't ask detailed questions about your relationships if you can remain discreet. I would expect the same considerations should I find someone I care about."

"Not going to tell him the Outsider is your secret romance?"

I sort of wish he could read my thoughts so he'd figure out he wasn't helping!

"I…are you sure?" Anton sounded confused. I couldn't blame him. This was probably the last offer he ever expected to get when I walked into his room.

"As long as you plan to keep doing your job helping both of our peoples and the empire. The country is in need of a lot of help. There will be long nights and this will not be a vacation. I hate to admit it but your father was right about the country needing new blood. Something hopeful to distract them from the bloodbath that Delilah caused." I tried to explain my reasoning in more detail for him. "My first inclination on the offer of engagement was to say no but once I learned more I decided this was worth offering. We won't have some fairy tale, not other than in the eyes of the people, but in our positions, we don't have that luxury. We can still do the country good and have private lives people don't see."

"Yes." Anton hesitated little before accepting. "Yes, if you'll bring in Nathanial and you'll take him with you now to get him used to the capital. I accept."

"I'll keep him safe. I know your father doesn't care for him but I already have something in mind. I know I'm asking you to trust me on this, but please do. Even if we don't have a traditional marriage we'll need to trust each other." I stated frankly. "I'll need you to tell me if something happens, or if you hear of any threats to you or to me. Not just now but ever. Clearly there are people that would like to get the crown. If I thought you wanted to steal it then I wouldn't be even trying to make this deal with you…but I don't."

"I don't." Anton repeated back to me in assurance. "I know it's hard to prove but I do want the country to do well and I've always felt I owe more to the citizens than just living it up in a mansion. If you'll keep Nathanial safe and take him with you I'll do whatever you want me to your highness. I'll owe you more than you know."

"Emily, please." I said, amused at how much he seemed to think I was saving him. If he knew that it was as much being selfish would he be so grateful. "If we're going to have to pretend, we better start sooner than later."

"Emily. Thank you." Anton stated seriously, he was honestly grateful.

"It is little to thank me for." I denied the appreciation as best I could. "I am getting what I want from this as well, we are allies in this Anton. I hope that we can become friends."

"I hope so as well." The gratitude was still rich in the man's voice and I smiled when he walked over to hug me. "Whatever it is, or whoever it is, they are lucky to have you."

He was apt, a good sign since he would have to match up at court.

"How could you tell?" I asked, not bothering to hide that he'd guessed right about me already having a relationship.

"No girl would agree to what you are without someone they cared about…no noble at all." He replied. "People want their fairy tale endings unless they figure out they can only get them another way."

"He's a swift one…"

I smiled at him all the same. He needed that. I expect he would be better at court politics than people knew. They wouldn't expect it of him since he could seem quite the innocent perfect gentlemen when he wanted to. The Outsider was right, he would be a good addition to the crown. The Empire would improve…that's what he'd told me and I could see it better now.

"You are clever, more than most would give you credit for." I observed.

"No need to win me over empress, I already agreed to your terms." Anton joked and I joined in him a light-hearted chuckle. I hoped we could keep that sense of comradery…but also, keep up appearances. He seemed capable of it, now if I would be able to do the same. I pursed my lips when the Outsider slipped inside, what was he playing at.

"My apologies your highness, and soon to be highness for breaking in but it seemed congratulations were in order." The Outsider bowed as he spoke, smiling at me despite my irritation with his appearance. "It seemed best to greet him in person, in the circumstances. He'll need to introduce me to Nathanial so I can take him to the boat."

"Your Royal Protector?" Anton's quickness came through again, he connected the dots just by the Outsider coming in. Of course, he didn't know the full extent of the truth but he'd already figured it out that we were in a relationship. "Well, like mother like daughter I suppose. I should thank you as well Artemus."

More than you know…

"I should be saying that to you." The Outsider replied politely, the way he should be expected to. "Should I retrieve Nathanial and take him to the boat?"

"Yes, let me introduce you both…Emily, you'll tell father in the morning? It will keep him distracted while I help arrange things." Anton was still chiefly concerned with his lover's safety. I glanced to the Outsider and he nodded.

"Of course, it is for the best." I agreed.

The Outsider left with an excited Anton chatting in his ear, glancing back to me and mouthing 'soon' again. It wasn't soon enough. I wasn't convinced that this was actually for the best but at least I'd saved innocent men from a poor fate.

"Stay strong my Empress," The Outsider whispered in my ear. "Try not to regret, and I'll try to make certain you have no reason to."

I smiled a bit after him despite my concerns. How did he know what to say so eloquently at some points and managed to be so utterly clueless at others? I took a deep breath after they left and nodded to myself. This was what I wanted, I wanted it now, and if I was doomed to regret I would do it later…I hoped that the Outsider would hold up those words as I walked back toward my room. We would have much still to do and keeping the boy safe until we reached the capital was a new job we possessed.

Soon he said, but soon wouldn't be today…

End Chapter

Heh, everyone is so tricky. I skipped a day of politics cause the Outsider doesn't really care about the finite details really XD.

-Aura

To my reviewers:

Thanks for the kind feedback, I'm glad people are enjoying it. I hope they continue to. I hope I get more time and more of my lazy muse to work so I can continue this sooner than later. : )

Grimm Kitsune – I think so…I think it works out well personally.

Sparda4 – Emily can still use her powers but she just hasn't used them much or had much reason to really.