"Ok, Mr and Mrs Belladonna, feel free to leave at this point in time. You've seen everything I think you guys need to see for now. Just think of home really hard if you wish to leave." Orb said. The two Faunus nodded, standing up.
"Kitten, I love you, and I wanted you to know that I am very proud of you." Ghira said, pulling his daughter. Kali also got in on hugging her daughter. "Please call us when you get back, ok?"
Blake nodded, giving her parents one last hug. They popped out of existence.
"We'll. At Least we can leave." Mercury sighed, comforted that he was not trapped here for eternity.
Blake blinked a couple times before sitting back down.
"You ok?" yang asked her partner.
"I will be. Could we start the next viewing? Please?" Blake pleaded. Orb nodded, pressing the play button on a remote.
The scene opened to a video game version of Jaune, in his a black hoodie with a yellow gold medic cross on the chest and back as he conga lined his way down a map.
"Sooo… Jaune." Came a voice from off screen. "Now that I've done Ruby, Wiess, Blake, Yang and Ren, I've got to do all the Jaune stereotypes." The voice took a deep breath in, prepping himself.
"And I've noticed that it is a mixed bag? Yeah, mixed bag is a good phrase for him. As always, I'm starting with the weapons and then the Misc. Cosmetics. As always, disclaimer, not everyone falls under their associated weapon stereotype, and not all cosmetics and weapons have a stereotype associated with them."
"Soo, we're in a video game? Cool." Yang said, sitting back. "I would like to see what this dude has to say about me."
Orb shrugged. "People who play you either have anger issues or are brain dead."
Yang looked offended as the video played on.
"So, first we are starting with Jaunes stock sword, Jaune's Sword. I know, creative name." an image of a dented and dinged Caroca Mors sword and shield was displayed. "Now anyone who uses this either appreciates a half decent stock weapon when they see one or are completely new to the game. It is mostly the latter, though."
The screen shifted to display in white text "Crusaders Crossguard". "So, the Crusaders Crossguard." Another sword popped up, except this was a white and gold two handed longsword. "This dude is probably knighting. You know who i'm talking about. They're the dude running around in either the Stock Plate Mail or the Crusaders Glory."
"Knighting? Sounds like Jaune." Ren said, thinking about what this would mean.
Orb turned, sensing Rens question. "Knighting, for those of you who don't know, is a popular style of Jaune gameplay where they are front line tanks and healers."
Ren nodded. Very much a Jaune style then.
"Not that that's bad or anything, they just tend to die. A lot."
The screen went back as another sword appeared. This one was a giant greatsword made out of grimm bone. "This dude is just being edgy. Or he's in an event. The anti-Grimm aspect of this sword is busted for PVE, but besides that? It's kind of useless. So if you see this guy in a PVP server, he's running a black cape and some black painted armor and is just being edgy. Oh, and he probably has one of the skull Roman hats because why not?" A Jaune with said sword, some black plate armor, and a Centurion helmet with a skull mask instead of a normal face plate.
Blake grimace. She hated edgy things like this. While most people assumed that she was edgy, she thought she wasn't. There is a difference between being aesthetic and being overly edgy.
"Yeah.. moving on!" an image of a spiked mace and shield showed up. "So, next up is the Paladin's Pummerler. These guys, for whatever reason always run the Enforcer's Fedora and the Pocket Pistol. I have no idea why, they just do."
A trench knife was displayed on screen. "The Trench knife. This dude is either new or memeing. No one uses this anymore!" the voice said, partially in anguish. "I mean, it used to be good before Beacon nerfed it to the ground, but now it's just kind of garbage." the voice paused. "Please Beacon, bring back the old trench knife. I miss it."
The next weapon shown was a pump shotgun with some fur decoration on it.
"Man, that looks sick!" Mercury said, looking at the shotgun. It did look really cool, with bear teeth on the end and various bits of brown fur sticking out on the grip and stock.
"The Siberian Saw-off. This dude does not trust his team to protect him at all. And he hates Rens and Blakes. Sneaky little mother-" a sound similar to the technical error beep sounded as the old fashioned "we'll be right back" Technical error screen popped up. "Yeah, I hate getting backstabbed."
Ruby turned to Blake. "You're a flanker in this? Makes sense. You are rather stealthy."
"So is Ren!" Blake defended. Ren was pretty quiet about it, only thinking about what his playstyle might be. He and Jaune did play games together, and often.
The next weapon was another shotgun, but with clear tubing that glowed pumping some kind of glowing green liquid into the barrel. "Ahh, the HSG 550. Aka, I don't like my already insane healing AOE, so i'm going to shoot people in the face to heal people even better! These guys also want to use the Conquistadors crossbow, but can't aim for shit."
Pyrrha turned to Ruby, being the resident gun expert. "Should we get Jaune a shotgun? It would improve his range capabilities."
Ruby thought it over. Nodding, she gave her optionon. "Yes. Yes. that would be a great idea! Ohh, I wonder if we can put a sword in it or something!"
Qrow and Tai just sighed. "Here we go again."
The screen shifted to a third shotgun, although this one was looking much more normal one, despite it's obvious antique age. The title read "Old fashioned."
"Ohh boy. Where do I start with these guys? Frankly, the old fashioned is such a common secondary among the few Jaunes there are out there that it's hard to find just one stereotype, so here are some common subsets."
An image of a Jaune in a blue set of armor and wielding Jaune's Sword. "If they're knighting, they're tired of being out ranged by literally everyone, so they pack this to give them some extra reach. And it's not bad, given it's frankly ridiculous shotgun range."
The next image was one of Jaune wearing something that looked like it belonged in the Great War, or the Napolean era. "These guys fill the same niche that the "old Money" Weiss mains fill. They really liked the rift in time update and think that the old stuff looks cool, which is great for them. These guys are just using the old fashioned to fill out the set."
The third Jaune image that was shown was him in his standard hoodie, but a flap jack and scarf around his neck. "The last "old Fashioned" group is… this guy. This guy did not get the memo that JAUNE IS A SUPPORT! AND HE REFUSES TO STAY AND CAP THE GOD DAMN POINT! I MEAN LORD ABOVE, THIS GUY JUST RUNS IN AND GETS SHOT!" the narrator took in a deep sigh. "Yeah, you know exactly who I am talking about. Charges in and blames his team when he gets filled with bullet holes. NEXT!"
Ren sighed. "I hate players like that, ruin the game with their toxicity for everyone else." he grumbled. Ruby turned to face him.
"I was unaware you played video games, Ren."
"I do. Jaune and I open up some games on his dust box every so often."
"Huh, interesting."
"The more you know." Yang mused as the group returned their attention to the screen.
Next up the title was 'The Medic Gun'. A strange gun like contraception that was in the shape of a weapon that would fire a large stream of liquid was on the screen. "These dudes are great." came the voice from off screen. "They're super chill, and very dedicated to the job of healing the teams. Stick by this guy, and you will survive just about anything."
"And finally, we have the Conquistadors Crossbow." an image of a crossbow with a large syringe duct taped to the bolt was displayed. "Anyone who uses this weapon is a try hard. And they are either really good with it and can hit cross map two fifty healing bolts on a flick just in time or they can't hit you even if you are right in front of them. There is no inbetween."
The screen was quiet for a moment. "Is that it? I think that's all of Jaunes weapons."
"So now we go on to his various misc's. And I don't have all day, so let's hop in!"
A set of what seemed to be an upgraded version of Jaunes armor showed up on screen. "The Knights Plate. Right, this dude apparently can't read the "Support" tag on Jaunes character selection, because this person plays Jaune like a tank, AND COMPLETELY IGNORES THE "E" KEY ON THEIR KEYBOARD!" The voice yelled in anger. "Yeah, i guess i'm a little salty with these guys." a picture appeared on the screen of a mountain of the white crystal next to a cave labeled "Salt Mine". The caption "an accurate description of my salt." was displayed.
The image shifted to a leather trench coat reminiscent of Torchwicks labeled the "Smooth Criminal."
"Ohh, good name." Torchwick smiled, puffing on a cigar.
Neo just rolled her eyes.
The scene was A blake with a pirate hat stopping by a Wiess. "I'm going to go get a health pack and i'll be back on the flank, alright?"
Weiss nodded as Blake ran off. As she turned a corner, Jaune with the Old Fashioned and the Smooth Criminal was waiting for her. "SURPRIZE, MOTHER FUCKER!" the scene cut to outside the hallway, where Blakes body ragdolled.
Nora snickered at the absurd physics of the game. Blake just pouted.
"Yeah… these guys somehow can out flank any Ren or Blake, and show up in the most unexpected places. The speed boost that this thing gives you even isn't that much! There is no way that they should be able to get to some of the places they end up in!"
Next was the "Cool Man Jaune." "ok, these guys are either, A: new and are wearing it because they just got it and it's a strange, or B: Lore geeks who know even the smallest random shit about Jaunes lore, including why Beacon won't ever pair him up with anyone, or why he even has the hoodie in the first place. And no, i'm not telling you, you can spend almost four months looking for it yourself."
Sun made a face. "Why would anyone do that?"
Neptune shrugged. "Some people like lore, man."
"Ok, so next up is is the Aracadian oath." A fancy older set of blue and white plate armor. "The general consensus is that these guys are good at their job. Like, I've never seen a god tier Arcadian Oath user, but i've also never seen a bad one. Beyond that? These guys are probably running the HSG or something like that. Not much to say here."
The screen switched to an armor set reminiscent of Cardins armor. This was labeled the "Crusaders Glory." A deep, deep breath was taken. Then the screen shook has heavy metal blared from the speakers for a moment as some gameplay was displayed on screen. "Ok, ok, enough. These dudes also ignore Jaunes healing ability most of the time, but know that it can be used in a pinch. These are the guys who you find in medieval mode with the Crusaders Crossguard and the Conquistadors Crossbow. Man, Jaune has a lot of stuff that starts with a C."
An image of six different capes showed up on screen. "Now we have the capes, and those associated stereotypes. That's right, Stereotypes, as in multiple. They really depend on the cape color. Anyone with a blue, grey, or White cape is running a defender and is knighting. If they've got a Red cape, check the armor. If it's the Centurion, they're paired with a Pyrrha. If not, they're with a Ruby. any other color and they just think that they look cool."
"So, after that, we get to the less used jaune misc cosmetics that still have a stereotype. Here we have the Pocket series" a pile of knitted dolls of various members of team RWBY, JNPR, and some grimm were displayed.
"Awww. that is very Jaune." Pyrrha said, taking note that she was in the pile.
"He always was a dork." Yang smiled, sinking into her chair.
"So, anyone who has this misc wears it because their significant other mains that class, like a Ren boyfriend or a Yang main wife or something. Or they have a grimm version and are rich as hell." the screen shifted to the hefty price tag of a grimm doll. "I mean the cheapest is… yeesh, way too much."
The crowd collectively winced, except for the schnees. They never did have quite a grasp on the common man's version of expensive.
Wiess leaned over to her sister. "Is that a lot?"
Winter shrugged. "People can't throw money around like us, Weiss."
Wiess nodded with acknowledgment, deciding not to continue the conversation.
After that faded away, the image of a large Viking-esk round shield attached to Jaunes back showed up, the caption "The Paranoia Shield." in white below it. "These guys hate Blakes and Rens even more than the Siberan Saw off guys do. Like, they really, Really hate getting flanked. A lot."
The Paranoia shield switched to a white lab coat with a red cross on the shoulder and scrubs. "This is the Medical Opinion, and these guys are serious tryhard medics. They understand that they are the only support in the game right now. And yes, I know that Wiess is a Support." he said condescending as the words "Support" in quotation marks flashed on the screen. "But Wiess only has one healing ability and it's a dust slot! A Dust slot! At least with the Black Ops update we're getting Velvet, who looks like a decent support."
Ozpin blinked. "Team coffee is in this?" the headmaster asked Orb.
"Yes. they were added in the Black Ops update way back when. It introduced two new tanks, Coco and Yatsu, a healer Velvet, and a Flanker DPS Fox."
"Do we ever enter the game?" Mercury asked orb out of curiosity.
"You three were boss fights in the campaign mode, although there are some crazy conspiracy theories that were going around that you would be added as the new hero in the next DLC that ended up being right."
Mercury made a huh sound as Cinder fumed a little in not being in the game.
The screen moved on to Jaune with one blind eye, a long scar crossing over it. "Anyone who wears the Blind Man's Betrayal is a Team Remnant 2 Veteren, because this was a promotional item for Left in Space way back in…" A wiki page was shown for the release date of Left in Space. "Holy crap! 2007? Man, I feel old now…"
The screen switched to a captains hat and a cigar on Jaune. "Ok, there are two stereotypes associated with the Captain Ark hat, being one of the only good Jaune Hats. And to tell them apart, you need to look at the source of lung cancer. If it's a cigar, they're a kill taunter. They will, without fail, taunt you after every death."
Ruby grumbled. "I don't like those guys. They're meanies."
Ren hummed in agreement.
"Now, if these guys have a pipe, they usually have some beard cosmetics like the Normal Norman or something like that, and are generally decent players and sports."
The screen changed to a cape made of grimm fur, the upper skulls of beowolves acting as pauldrons and a silver chain with the Arc symbol embossed on a charm at the end hung from the brooch. Silver and blue embroidery and lining adorned the cape
"Holy SHIT that is SICK!" Yang laughed as many of the audiences marveled at it, as impractical as it was.
"Ahhh, the legendary Grimm End Cape. if you see this due in a server, run. For those of you who don't know, this is the end game reward for the single player campaign given when you complete it on nightmare mode. As Jaune. As Jaune." the narrator repeated, his voice becoming more and more dead pan as he said it.
"Well, anyway, I think that's it for all the cosmetics with noticeable stereotypes. Nora's next, so look out for that! Bye!" the screen blitz to black with a click
"I get the feeling that that is really, really hard." Emerald said unease.
"It is stupidly hard." Orb complained. "Anyway, next segment!"