Chapter 17: Tough Choices
"Ungh…"
Jessie looked up from her game as she saw Rufus shuffling down the corridor inside the Highwind.
"Hey- you shouldn't be up!" the computer guru exclaimed as she turned off her game and went over to the vice president.
"Aeris healed me," Rufus said weakly, "I'm just tired…but I needed some water,"
"Then sit here," Jessie directed him to the chair she had been sitting in, "Where's your two lackeys?"
"Got sick of seeing their faces all the time," Rufus told her, "When I'm at home, I can just hang around my suite, and they're outside, not bothering me at all. It's a little different here. I told them to get lost and let me sleep,"
"I'll go find you some water," Jessie said.
"Why?"
"Because like it or not, you're actually a big help. We'd have never found the temple if it wasn't for you,"
"And then Jenova wouldn't have ended up with the materia," Rufus muttered.
"We can still track her down," Jessie argued, "Point is, we know where she's headed. Once we find her, we'll deal with her before she can do anything stupid. She's probably gonna hold off until she sees Sephiroth again,"
Rufus sighed. "So the great swordsman has been reduced to the status of bait, huh?"
"Can't you just keep a lid on it for once?" Jessie groaned, "What if Aeris heard that joke? She's been in a funk since she returned,"
"What exactly is it between those two?" Rufus inquired, "She calls him 'big brother', but acts like he's her handsome prince or something,"
"It's…oh, how should I say? Oh yeah: none of your business,"
"Clever," Rufus chuckled, "You've got quite the cutting wit,"
Jessie rolled her eyes. "Such a compliment from the master himself. Do you want the water or not?"
"Yes, please,"
Jessie walked away, muttering something under her breath.
So she thinks I'm a big help, eh? I guess her appraisal of me has a little more value than most others'. Hmm…I wonder what game she was playing…?
Give her something to look forward to when she becomes part of that spirit energy!
Sephiroth cringed at the memory of those words. He remembered everything he'd done. He also realized exactly what Jenova meant by him and Aeris being 'together'. Just as he'd left his mind open for her to plunder, she'd also allowed him a glimpse into her mind.
She wanted him to kill Aeris, for the purpose of adding more power to the lifestream, but not before torturing her while she was still alive. Her ideas were not that of him romancing the girl. She wanted to see Aeris in pain- physical and emotional. After all…she was the last descendant of the people who'd sealed her for so many years.
And he'd almost done it. The sight of her exposed flesh had nearly made him do the unthinkable.
Thank the Planet Vincent got to me before I…
A soft knock at the door interrupted his thoughts. "Who is it?" he called.
"It's me," Aeris said softly, "Can I come in?"
"No," Sephiroth said, much harsher than he'd meant to, "I mean…please don't. I…don't deserve to even look at you,"
He could hear her sigh. "Seph, cut the melodrama,"
"Like I cut that hole in your shirt?"
"Don't worry about it. You taught me well. Think of it as the ultimate test from the master. Hey, if a simple wannabe flower merchant can dodge your blows, then you've done your job,"
"……"
"Or better yet- maybe it'll catch on as a new style- those ripped shirts. Oh, it'll be all the rage by next spring!"
"I can't believe you're actually making jokes,"
"What else is there to do right now?"
"I don't know. I…can't help what I do when I'm around that…thing!"
"….Well…then maybe you should worry about it. And let me handle Meteor,"
Sephiroth snorted. "You'll handle Meteor? Going to fly into the air and push it back into space?"
"I'm just saying that you should take care of yourself…so you don't have a nervous breakdown, okay?"
Sephiroth laughed bitterly. "So now little Aeris is fussing over me, afraid I'll go crazy. This day just keeps getting better and better,"
"Seph…"
"Please…just leave me alone," Sephiroth pleaded.
Silence. "…All right. Just remember…it's Jenova that I despise. Not you,"
He could hear her walking away. Sephiroth closed his eyes and tried to sleep.
"And I thought Gongaga was in the middle of nowhere…"
Rufus looked around the area disdainfully. It looked like a simple backwater community. The "architecture" consisted of houses half built into the sides of the canyon. Looking at his PHS, he could barely get a signal.
Cid had insisted on stopping at Cosmo Canyon to refuel. Vincent had agreed, seeing as the rations were low. Thus, the Avalanche/Shinra/Tifa alliance was granted another afternoon off.
"Worried that you'll break another nail?" Jessie asked, a smirk on her face.
Rufus ignored her teasing. "No wonder the old man stays away from here,"
"Yeah," Aeris butted in acidly, "Three of the most peaceful years of my life were spent here as a result. Hmm, imagine that!"
"Whatever," Rufus walked away.
Jessie stared at her friend, a bit confused. "Okay, see…usually I'm the crabby one, and you're little miss sunshine. What's up with the heavy sarcasm?"
"I…" Aeris trailed off and sighed. "I just need to get my head straight,"
"Let's go get something to eat," Jessie suggested, "Then Zack will randomly bump into us, like he seems to be doing a lot,"
"Huh?"
Jessie shook her head, exasperated. "Are you even listening to me?"
"Something about Zack and food?"
Jessie looked around to make sure the soldier wasn't in earshot. He was making his way up a long set of stairs with Cloud tagging behind him.
She turned and looked at Aeris. "Zack is totally into you. Haven't you noticed?"
"…Wait- noticed what?"
"Oh, forget it!" Jessie walked away annoyed.
Aeris sighed. No one had told the others about the specific reason why Jenova had the black materia. As far as they were concerned, the insane Seraph had swooped in at the last minute and made off with the dangerous orb. No one knew about Sephiroth having attacked Aeris.
Sighing, Aeris decided to look for somewhere that she could be alone with her thoughts.
Rufus stood in the modest observatory he'd stumbled upon, staring warily at the large cat-like beast before him. Behind it, the chief elder of Cosmo Canyon stood, watching Rufus amusedly.
"He's not gonna maul me…is he?" Rufus asked the elderly man.
"Why don't you ask me instead?" the beast spoke, "I'm not deaf, you know,"
Rufus jumped back, startled. "My god, you can talk?? What the hell are you?!"
"I am what you see," the large feline replied calmly, "My tribe were protectors of those who appreciate this beautiful canyon, and the Planet,"
"Ho, ho!" the chief elder chuckled, "Welcome to Cosmo Canyon, Rufus Shinra. My name is Bugenhagen, and this is, for all practical purposes, my grandson Nanaki,"
"Grandfather, aren't the Shinra supposed to be trouble?" Nanaki nudged the old man's knee with his nose.
"Don't worry," Rufus said, "I'm just passing through. I should be gone by tonight,"
"You're traveling with Avalanche, are you not?" Bugenhagen asked.
Rufus folded his arms. "How did you know?"
"I'm rather friendly with Avalanche," Bugenhagen answered, "I'm aware of some of their activities. Do you, by any chance, know a little girl named Aeris?"
"I know a girl named Aeris, but she's not that little," Rufus answered.
"Oh! Ho, hooo!" Bugenhagen laughed, "You're right. The last time I saw her, she was only ten years old. She'd be a young woman now,"
Nanaki's ears perked up. "Is Aeris here?"
Rufus shrugged. "She's mucking about somewhere,"
"I'm going to go find her!" Nanaki announced as he bounded out of the room.
"Ho, ho, hoo…young people," Bugenhagen chuckled, "Though you would know, wouldn't you? How old are you?"
"Twenty-three," Rufus answered.
The elder nodded. "Old enough to stand on your own. But I'm sure you've been trying to do that for a long time,"
"Maybe," Rufus said defensively, "I've always been considered smart for my age,"
"Intelligence and maturity are two different things," Bugenhagen pointed out. "Take Nanaki, for example. His intellect is astounding. But in his years, he's only about fourteen or fifteen years old. But he yearns to be an adult. I've told him, though. To try and stand on your own before you're ready…it will destroy you in the long run. Ambition is fine. But if you don't look down from the stars once in a while, you begin to lose perspective. And when it's time for this planet to die, you'd find that you really knew nothing at all,"
Rufus looked bored. "Is this supposed to be a 'modern' philosophical discussion where you tell me I can never truly 'know' anything? Because I don't have time for such nonsense,"
"Ho, ho! No, nothing so pretentious as that. I'm talking about you specifically. You're intelligent in the problem-solving sense. I can tell right away. But you lack wisdom. Understandable- wisdom and youth do not go together,"
"What was that last part about the Planet dying?" Rufus asked.
Bugenhagen sighed. "It may be tomorrow, or a hundred years from now. But it's not far off,"
"And you know this, how?" Rufus asked skeptically.
"I hear the cries of the Planet," Bugenhagen replied.
"So…you're an Ancient too? How many of those are still around?"
"Ho! No- nothing so fantastic as that. Ah, that poor girl…I'm sure she'd have been delighted to know another one of her kind…so lonely, she must be,"
"So how do you hear the Planet then?" Rufus asked.
A throbbing noise could be heard. Rufus traced the sound to a giant contraption in the room.
"Stand over there…" Bugenhagen pointed to the center of the room.
Rufus obeyed, and the elder pulled a switch. The lights in the room dimmed, and a holographic image of the solar system appeared around the young executive.
"Impressive," Rufus commented.
Bugenhagen's eyes twinkled. "Yes, it is something, isn't it? Aeris' father built this machine over twenty years ago. Anyway- let's get to the subject. And I know you're clearly the impatient type, so please, bear with me, and don't interrupt,"
He cleared his throat and began to speak:
"Eventually... all humans die. What happens to them after they die? The body decomposes, and returns to the Planet. That much everyone knows. What about their consciousness, their hearts and their souls? The soul too returns to the Planet. And not only those of humans, but everything on this Planet. In fact, all living things in the universe, are the same.
"The spirits that return to the Planet, merge with one another and roam the Planet. They roam, converge, and divide, becoming a swell, called the 'Lifestream',"
He paused briefly, and continued:
"Lifestream... In other words, a path of energy of the souls roaming the Planet. 'Spirit Energy' is a word that you should never forget. A new life...children are blessed with Spirit energy and are brought into the world. Then, the time comes when they die and once again return to the Planet. Of course there are exceptions, but this is the way of the world. I've digressed, but you'll understand better if you watch this…"
Rufus watched as a figure of a child appeared on the model of the Planet. The figure grew to the shape of a grown man, then shriveled up slightly, hunching over. Finally, the man dissipated into what looked like the tendrils of the Lifestream. The tendrils spread out, and a tree emerged on one spot. Eventually, it dissipated as well. Another human rose and fell, until the entire Planet was covered in the Lifestream.
"Spirit energy makes all things possible: trees, birds, and humans. Not even that, but spirit energy makes it possible for the Planet itself to exist. What if that energy were to disappear?"
Rufus saw the Lifestream leave the Planet. The model turned black, and crumbled into nothing.
"These are the basics of the study of Planet life," Bugenhagen finished as he turned off the machine.
Rufus squinted as the lights came back on. "So…the old man…and my grandfather…they really screwed up, didn't they?"
"Ho hoo! You said it…I did not,"
"If spirit energy is lost," Rufus said thoughtfully, "Our world is destroyed…"
"Every day, mako reactors suck up the spirit energy, diminishing it without replacing it. The energy gets compressed in the reactors, and processed into mako energy,"
"In other words, mako energy will only destroy the Planet," Rufus concluded. "No wonder my father stayed away from here. Heaven forbid that he be forced to listen to the truth…"
Bugenhagen scratched his head. "You have a lot of power, Rufus Shinra. Would you be the one who finally uses it for good…?"
Rufus stared at the floor. This revelation was…troubling, at best. This changed a lot. He would succeed the old man no matter what. But would he even have enough time left to do that?
"I need some time to think about this…" Rufus whispered as he headed for the door. He stopped briefly and turned his head slightly. "Thank you, Bugenhagen…"
The chief elder sighed as Rufus closed the door behind him.
So much on that boy's shoulders, Bugenhagen thought, I hope he does the right thing…
The image her ancestors had sent her at the temple was still fresh in her mind. The Sleeping Forest…leading to the Ancient city. Aeris remembered her father promising to take her and Sephiroth to see the old city.
Her belongings were still in her duffel bag on the airship. She had her sword. Everything was ready.
She hated the idea of making everyone worry. Jessie, Zack, Tifa…not to mention Vincent, and most of all, Sephiroth.
It's only a matter of time before Jenova summons Meteor. I have no choice. Only a survivor of the Cetra like me can stop it.
She recalled the other image they'd left her with: the white materia.
Mama…you were entrusted with something so great like this…Aeris thought as she rolled the white orb between her fingers. Now the burden rests on me…
Tucking the orb into her hair ribbon, she then heaved a sigh as she turned to go back to the airship. Hopefully Sephiroth wouldn't notice her trying to slip away.
"Aeris!"
She turned around to see Nanaki running toward her. Forgetting her monstrous task for a moment, she broke into a huge grin.
"Nanaki!" she exclaimed as she knelt down and threw her arms around the red beast's neck.
He nuzzled her face. "It's been too long!"
"I know!" she exclaimed, "I meant to stop by a few weeks ago, but my chocobo and I ended up getting a ride straight to Costa Del Sol,"
"Where's Sephiroth?" he asked, "You never went anywhere without him watching over you,"
Aeris' expression quickly sobered.
Nanaki's ears lowered slightly. "Did…something happen to Sephiroth?"
"Oh- nothing like that!" Aeris exclaimed as she shook her head, "No, he's been traveling with me and a bunch of other people. But he's…not well. He's back on the airship we came on, and he won't see anyone right now,"
"Oh," Nanaki looked disappointed. "How long are you planning to stay?"
"Not long, unfortunately," Aeris confessed, "I'm heading up north soon. Hey, I'm sorry I haven't written in a while. I'll be sure to keep in touch this time,"
"You promise?"
Aeris smiled and stood up. "Of course. But in the meantime, let's go for a walk,"
Nanaki nuzzled the girl's leg. "I'd love that,"
Sephiroth awoke to hear an argument going on outside his cabin. Looking out the window, he saw it was dark already. They would probably be heading off soon. That was not a pleasant thought.
Listening carefully, he could make out Rufus' angry voice, and Vincent's calm but firm arguments.
He got to his feet and headed for the door, preparing to tell the two of them to take it somewhere else.
"I'm telling you that we don't have time!" he heard Rufus yelling as he opened the door.
"Until we find her, we're not going anywhere," Vincent replied coolly.
"Jenova isn't going to wait for Aeris!" Rufus shouted.
"What's going on?" Sephiroth asked.
"Aeris is gone," Vincent told him, "We checked her room, and her things are gone,"
"What?!" Sephiroth exclaimed, "When did this happen? Where is she?"
"We don't know," Rufus answered sourly, "No one knows,"
Sephiroth closed his eyes and brought his hand to his head. "I don't believe this…" he groaned, "How long has she been gone?"
"Nobody's seen her for the past couple hours," said Rufus, "That big red cat, Nanny-something, was the last to see her,"
"Nanaki?" Sephiroth didn't wait to hear the rest. He turned and headed for the ship's exit.
When he came back almost an hour later, everyone else was on the ship.
Nanaki had been rather frightened of Sephiroth's intense interrogation. The feline creature had spent a little time with Aeris before she announced that she had to leave now. But that hadn't been good enough for the silver-haired swordsman, and he'd demanded further answers that his old acquaintance couldn't give.
He'd felt bad for treating Nanaki that way, and managed to apologize before leaving.
I seem to be apologizing a lot these days.
Frustrated, he returned to his cabin. Upon stepping inside, he nearly slipped on something. Looking down, he saw it was a small piece of paper. Wondering how long it had been there, he picked it up. His eyes widened as he recognized Aeris' handwriting.
I'll be going now, the note read. I'll come back when it's all over.