A/N: I loved reading the reactions some of you had to my chapter yesterday and I'm glad you guys are enjoying it! I wrote the next chapter for all of you which is shorter and has less action in it but more emotion and drama. I'm taking this story in such a way where it's deviating from season 2. To recap, Hershel told her to leave and I intend to follow through on that, just not for a couple of chapters. I just gotta say one thing, you guys will be loving Daryl here. I'm uploading this super late/ early it's 340am here lol and only because I saw a midnight showing of The Last Jedi which is amazing so any Star Wars fans out there? YOull love it!
Thank you to everyone who reads and responds to my story especially my reviewers!
frosiedog: Haha I know I felt like I needed to amp up the level of drama and intensify it for where I intended for this story to go. Well hate is a strong word, people have mixed reactions and you'll get samples of how all the different characters are going to react to her depending on their already established relations with her. I never intended for them to kiss this early but it felt so right in that moment. more fluff to come...
JasminJW: I'm so glad you love this story! I hope you like/enjoy the direction I take this in..
Lizard21: yeah Dale's initial reaction is shocked but I think what I did stayed true to his character. I would love to do that, but we will see
Disclaimer: I do not own the Walking Dead or it's affiliated characters and storyline, only my OC and plotline.
- Angels and Douchebags
Rick stood staring at Sophia's body lying on the floor. Carol was still crying uncontrollably and Lori was hugging Carl on the ground.
"Don't look." He turned around to Lori and Carl. Beth was crying wildly and began walking towards the bodies.
"Wait," Rick said trying to hold her back but she shoved him away. I walked after Beth as she pulled the bodies off a female Walker who she began crying over. Suddenly it snarled and tried to grab her hair making her scream. Rick and I were there in a flash pulling her off the Walker as T-Dog ran in stomping it's head until the brain was splattered over the floor. Andrea took an axe and swung it through the head until it stopped growling.
Beth shoved me back looking at me with such hatred in her eyes. I looked away from her, down at the ground with tears filling my eyes. Hershel put an arm around his daughter's shoulders with Patricia holding her other side walking back towards the house. They looked defeated as Maggie trudged along. I stood a good distance behind them, knowing I was not welcome anymore.
"We've been combing these woods for weeks and she was in that barn the whole time!" Shane exclaimed to Rick.
"You knew!" He pointed accusingly at Hershel.
"Shane, just stop man!" Rick said trying to pull him back.
"I think you knew, and you kept it from us." He pointed at the four member family.
"We didn't know!" Maggie snapped back turning around to face him.
"Otis put those people in the barn, maybe he found her and put her in there before he was killed." Hershel suggested as Maggie, Beth and Patricia went inside the house. I stood back on the porch steps not knowing what to say.
"But we would never have known. Because he died." Hershel looked at me and I looked down at his unnerving gaze. Rick stood in front of me trying to be the peacekeeper in the situation.
"You know what man I don't believe you." Shane shook his head.
"I don't care what you believe!" Hershel shouted losing his temper.
"Everybody just calm down okay!" Rick put his hands out between Hershel and Shane.
"Get him off my land! Her too!" He pointed at Shane and then me. I couldn't help it, the tears started falling. I walked into the house stuffed my clothes into my pack and took a couple of water bottles and some cans of food as well as sanitary products I needed. I walked back out of the house Rick coming after me.
"Polaris wait," He said trying to stop me. I pushed him off me and walked over to the RV where Carol, Daryl, Lori and Carl were. I took my jacket and walked out without saying a word.
"Pol," I heard Daryl call I ignored him and walked off towards the highway.
"Hey, where you going!" He shouted walking behind.
"Leaving! That's what you guys want." I said brushing the tears away from my face.
"Hershel wanted me off the land. So I'm going! Don't follow me." I shouted. Daryl jogged and caught up walking beside me.
"If you're going I'm going." Daryl said swinging his crossbow over his back.
"Don't be stupid." I scoffed. Daryl stepped in front of me pushing me back.
"What are you doing?" I shouted at him annoyed he wasn't letting me leave.
"Didn't you hear what I said, what I did? Let me leave." I said moving past him. He held my arms not letting me go.
"Daryl," I warned in a low voice.
"Are you really gonna leave without your gun?" He pulled it out from behind him and I could see the P engraved in the colt python.
"Give it to me." I held out my hand to him and he shook his head walking back to the farm.
"Fine I'll just leave without it then." I started walking off.
"And your knife?" I looked down at my belt and my knife was missing. I turned around seeing Daryl holding both the knife and gun in his hand.
"Daryl!" I growled angrily at him.
"You're gonna have to follow me back!" Daryl shouted as I began running after him.
"Give me the knife and gun!" I shouted as his longer legs ran faster.
"No!" He shouted back we reached the RV where we were both out of breath and Daryl put the gun at the back of his trousers. I gave him a glare to which he shrugged. Lori and Carl were looking at us.
"Daryl, I'm leaving today. Whether you like it or not." I said firmly crossing my arms over my chest.
"Thanks Daryl," Rick came up behind him and patted him on the shoulder.
"Please," He came up and stood in front of me.
"Just stay today. Then you can leave tomorrow, I'm going to try to talk to Hershel to see what he says." Rick said walking off back to the house before I could say anything. I was looking at Daryl before walking down on the field, he followed me.
"I'm sorry." Daryl said from behind. I turned around to look at him.
"What are you sorry for?"
"That you felt like you couldn't tell anyone." Daryl said surprisingly. He held out my gun in front of him giving it back to me.
"How are you so sure I won't take it and go?" I raised an eyebrow at him.
"You won't." He said sure of himself. I took the gun from him and holstered it. I took my knife and re-sheathed it back against my belt.
"I don't believe you shot him in cold blood." Daryl said.
"I didn't," I stated simply and Daryl nodded for me to continue.
"Shane. He found out about my past and blackmailed me that he was going to expose me to the rest of you and that he would hurt Rick, Lori and Carl." I explained.
"I figured as much." Daryl said not seeming surprised.
"You saw that display the barn. He's unhinged." I said.
"Now I tried explaining this to Rick but he can't see past his best friend. I am not leaving with exposing Shane for the bastard he is." I said angrily.
"What do you need?"
I looked over the field to where Andrea was covering up Sophia's body. Daryl went inside the RV to check on Carol, I thought it was best to not see her at the moment. She was a mother in grieving and I wanted nothing more to do than comfort her but she wouldn't take it well if I went with Daryl. No. He's better suited for this. I saw Carl and Lori sitting by the fire looking solemn eating their food.
"Can we talk?" I put my hands on my hips as Lori looked up seeing me standing there. She nodded sending Carl inside the tent she shared with Rick. Lori stood up towering over me.
"Listen I know you're mad at me, I know you probably won't ever trust me again. But this is not about me. This is about Shane." I said.
"What about him?" She asked confused.
"Okay you saw that display of erratic behaviour at the barn. Shane is dangerous. He knew about my past and blackmailed me to shoot Otis, otherwise he'd hurt you and he'd hurt Rick. And after what happened in the CDC, well I didn't want to risk that." I said feeling the tears forming in my eyes. Lori's gaze softened slightly.
"I thought if anyone should get it. It's you." I said gesturing to her.
"I know what you've done. I know you've said you made a mistake and if it was up to me, I wouldn't be sending you away." Lori said pushing my hair back.
"I know." I smiled at her.
"But the reason I came to talk to you, was you need to tell Rick." I said taking in a deep breath.
"Tell him what?"
"About what Shane tried to do to you." Lori took a sharp inhale of breath and began shaking her head.
"Hear me out." I tried to calm her down.
"I tried to explain this to Rick, but his love for Shane is making him blind to it. If it comes from you he may be more inclined to believe. It's up to you to make the decision Lori, it may stop him from hurting more people but I'm not gonna force you." I said and Lori nodded. I sat down by the fire with her sitting down beside me.
"Does Carl hate me?" I asked her tentatively.
"No honey, he doesn't hate you. He's just shocked and sad about Sophia. He wanted to believe he'd be the one to find her." She said rubbing my back.
"I really want to apologise to him." I said sighing.
"I know," Lori said.
"He's a strong kid. He'll move past this and he'll forgive you, I know he will." She said firmly nodding her head. She went inside the tent and brought Carl out, taking his to the house to rest. I followed them down to the barn where Rick, Shane, Andrea, T-Dog and Jimmy were around the bodies.
"We should have a service for Sophia." I said as they turned around to look at me.
"Carol would want that." Andrea agreed.
"We all want that." T-Dog said. Rick stood standing there in silence staring at the dead Walkers on the ground.
"Uh, we're gonna need a truck to move the bodies. We'll have a service for Sophia, Annette and Shaun." Lori nodded at Jimmy as the rest agreed.
"We can bury them up there by those trees." I piped in as Lori nodded her head. Everyone got to work. Andrea disappeared off into the barn to find more Walkers and Lori led Rick over to one side and gestured for me to join her.
"What did Hershel say?" Lori asked him as Rick looked at me guiltily then back at Lori.
"It's okay. Just tell me." I said taking in a breath.
"He wants us off the farm. Pol and Shane at least." I looked at Rick who looked just as sad as I did. His best friend and well me, would have to leave.
"That's not a surprise. We're lucky someone wasn't killed." Lori said lowly. I closed my eyes blinking away the tears. Otis was.
"I'm so-"
"It's okay Lori." I said putting my hands out. I don't need any more sympathy from anyone else. Rick looked around concentrating on a fixed point on the ground.
"Baby, what is it?" Lori asked him as he refused to meet her gaze.
"She was there, this whole time." He chuckled dryly gesturing to the farm.
"You did everything you could." I looked up at him as he turned his attention to me.
"Yeah, I know, I always do don't I?" He sighed looking down at the ground.
"Went after her. Protected her. Killed those Walkers, but she still got bit. Carl got shot." Rick said his voice wavering slightly.
"People counted on me and I was chasing a ghost in a forest." Rick said before storming off throwing his knife to one side.
"I can try to-" I suggested and Lori nodded giving her consent. I walked off after Rick jogging slightly to keep up with his strides.
"Rick," I called out softly and he turned around.
"You can't blame yourself for the turn of events that happened. It's the same as me. I was trying to work on a treatment, but how could I know it went horribly wrong and jumpstarted the apocalypse." I said pulling his arm so he looked into my eyes instead of the ground.
"If you let yourself hold on to this guilt. It's going to eat you up inside." I said rubbing his arm.
"I'm sorry I couldn't get Hershel to change his mind." Rick said changing the subject.
"It's no less than I deserve honestly." I stated and Rick was about to argue against it.
"Rick, I've made my peace with it."
"I don't want you to leave." Rick said lowly. Please don't Rick. Don't give me reasons to stay when you know I can't.
"Maybe it's for the best. I know what you said yesterday, after our incident. You shouldn't have done that, and I shouldn't have done it back. When I know you're married, I really care for you Rick. I do." He looked somewhat shocked digesting what I was telling him. I practically admitted that I like him.
"And I love Lori like a sister. Which is why even if I could stay, it just doesn't feel right. It was in the heat of the moment, we were both confused and angry and it was a mistake." I said trying to convince him.
"It wasn't." Rick said after a while.
"It wasn't a mistake. I wasn't confused. My mind was clear, crystal clear." He said clearly.
"Rick, don't." I warned him.
"You have a wife, you love. A son. A baby on the way. Don't." I said more firmly this time.
"I know you felt something." Rick said after a minute holding both my arms.
"It doesn't matter what I felt, it can't ever be anything." I gently took his hands off my arms as they fell to his side. I had tears in my eyes and Rick was mirroring my expression of sadness.
I left him standing by the house as I walked back to the RV where Glenn was keeping watch. I walked inside the RV slowly where Daryl was sitting on the counter holding his rifle with Carol watching out the window in silence.
"They're ready." Lori came inside as we followed her out to where the graves were dug and the bodies were wrapped up by their side. They were lowered into the graves and then covered, with Hershel leading the service we all stood over in silence in respect for the dead. The service was over as soon as it started.
Carol walked off into the field and came across the Cherokee flowers. She was sitting the grass alone in silence, picking off petals. She twirled it in her fingers before throwing it into the river in frustration. She threw all the flowers in sobbing. I decided to leave her to mourn for her daughter.
T-Dog and Andrea picked up a Walker and loaded it in the back of the truck. I wordlessly joined them lifting one end of the Walker as another pair of hands came to lift the other side. I looked up seeing Rick standing opposite me and we threw it in the back of the blue pick up truck.
"Any more trips?" Rick asked Andrea and T-Dog.
"We got lucky." She grunted out heaving the body onto the back.
"You can't tell me this was right." Dale said coming up to us.
"It wasn't and it'll cost us with Hershel." Rick said looking around.
"I'm glad Shane did what he did. Walkers in my backyard? Uh uh." T-Dog said shaking his head.
"I'm not saying we shouldn't have taken care of the problem, but creating a panic?" Dale raised his voice annoyed.
"There's not point arguing about it. It's done." Lori said calmly arms folded across her chest. T-Dog got inside the truck and Andrea sat at the back as they drove off to burn the other Walker bodies elsewhere. I walked back towards the house where Glenn and Maggie were talking to each other.
"Can I talk to you guys?" I said tentatively.
"What do you want?" Maggie said harshly. Before I could speak the cluttering of plates smashing to the floor in the kitchen could be heard and Beth was lying on the floor.
"Beth," Maggie shouted as we ran to the kitchen. I slung one arm over my side and Glenn took the other side as we went up the stairs laying her on the bed.
"What's wrong with her?" Maggie asked me and I went around feeling her head and checking her breathing.
"Uh it's possible that she's in shock." I said leaning back seeing how pale she had gone.
"But we need your dad. Where is he?" I looked at Maggie and Glenn.
"We don't know. He hasn't been here a while." Glenn stated. We went to the next room where Rick, Shane and Lori were checking through his things.
"Seems like he found an old friend." Shane held up a small bottle of liquor and tossed it to Shane.
"That was my grandfather's he gave it to my daddy after he died." Maggie said turning it over in her hands.
"Where's the nearest bar in town?"
"Hattins." Maggie said.
"That's where I'm going to find him." Rick said decisively.
"I've seen where that bar is I'll take you." Glenn said walking after Rick as Maggie started protesting.
"Don't worry. I'll bring him back Maggie." He touched her forearm before walking out of the room.
"Have you even thought about this?" Lori said to Rick stopping him from walking any further.
"You're seriously gonna try and find him man after all that." Shane scoffed.
"Hershel opened his home to us, and then the thing at the barn happened. Don't you think we owe it to him?" I challenged Shane.
"Sure we do. But he's right, this is no time to head off." Lori said frustrated.
"It's the least I could do for Hershel after-" Rick began.
"After what?" Shane asked walking away past them.
"Carl said he would've shot Sophia himself. That's your own son, he's growing cold. He needs a father like you in this world. Alive." She emphasised.
"He will be alive." I said as both of them turned around to face me.
"Because I'm going with him."
Rick stood with the driver's side car door opening reloading and checking the rifles we had. I loaded more rounds into my pistol and holstered it putting my belt around me and making sure my knife was sharpened on the other side of the car. Glenn came out of the house with Maggie following close behind. I glanced at Rick who was looking at them as they kissed each other goodbye. He looked back down then glanced at me. I could feel the heat rising in my cheeks again and focused on sharpening my knife glancing up at Rick again when he was turned away. Rick looked up and leaned his arm against the door. I put the knife in my belt and took my hair out retying it higher so it wouldn't get in the way. Rick looked towards Glenn and I followed his gaze as he walked towards us rifle in hand.
"You ready?" Rick said adjusting his belt.
"Yeah." Glenn said looking at us both. I gave him a small smile which he returned. Glenn settled in the front seat next to Rick and I sat in the back behind Rick as the car engine spluttered and we went off. It was silent in the car as no one spoke to each other.
"So, the original gang's back together." Glenn said looking around making me chuckle and Rick scoff.
"I don't hate you Pol." Glenn said turning his head back to me.
"You don't?" I asked leaning forward to see him.
"No, it's been explained." Glenn said glancing at Rick who kept his eyes on the road. I leaned forward putting my chin on Rick's shoulder and nudged it gently smiling my gratitude at him. He smiled back and cleared his throat. I went back down into my seat putting my feet up across the car seats. Glenn sat solemnly looking down at the Rifle as Rick glanced at him every now and then.
"Maggie said she loves me." I sat up glancing at Rick in the mirror who made eye contact with me then back at Glenn.
"Glenn, that's great!" I said.
"She doesn't mean it." He let out a dry chuckle.
"I mean she can't right?" He looked at Rick for confirmation who continued driving.
"She's upset or confused. Or whatever." Glenn trailed off looking out of the window.
"I think she's smart enough to know what she's feeling." Rick stated reassuring Glenn.
"No, no. You know she wants to be in love so she needs something to hold on to." Glenn said as Rick laughed.
"You know it's pretty obvious to everyone she loves you and not because you're the last man standing. So what's the problem?" Rick asked him.
"Can I get a woman's perspective on this?" Glenn asked turning back.
"Well I know next to nothing about love," I said scoffing making Glenn frown.
"But I do know, that us women are actually less complicated than you think. We liked to be listened to and we mean the things we say. Glenn if Maggie said she loves you. Then she loves you." I said smiling at him.
"I didn't say it back." Glenn said.
"Uh huh." Rick said.
"I've never had a woman say that to me before. You know except my mom of course and my sisters. But with Maggie it's different." Glenn said getting flustered.
"Yeah of course, she's definitely not your mom or sister." I said jokingly laughing as Rick joined in making Glenn glare at both of us.
"But seriously this is a good thing. Something we don't get enough of these days. Enjoy it." Rick said half-smiling at him. That damn smile of is. As if I didn't like him enough. He goes ahead and kisses me. And then he smiles like that. I could feel butterflies in my stomach so instead I just focused on looking at the forest areas outside of the window.
"When we get back, return the favour. It's not like she's going anywhere." Rick advised him.
"Don't miss your chance Glenn, if you love her too, say it back." I sighed looking out of the window.
"I don't even know if I do, how would I know?" Glenn asked looking back at me. I turned to face him.
"As I said you're asking the wrong girl here, but I suppose you would find yourself thinking about them all day. You would be constantly looking at them, sneaking glances when you think they're not looking. You can't imagine life without them." I looked at Rick through the mirror covering his eyes from the sun. He glanced at me and I turned away before he could see anything.
"You seem to know a lot about it, for someone who said they'd never been in love." Glenn stated looking back at the front.
"Huh. I do don't I?"
A/N: For the most part I enjoyed writing this chapter. What do you guys think?