If you feel like reading an excuse for how tremendously late this is, it's that I've been working on several other fics and there's a good chance I'll be posting a Boku no Hero Academia one soon.
If not, go ahead.
I'll reply to reviews when I can, because this is the last ounce of free time I have before going on a trip and I wanted to share this chapter before having to delay it another week. I'm kind of nervous about it. You'll see why.
Edit: Corrected an odd format mistake that somehow got through revision. Huh.
22. Home is where the hearts are
(Sometimes you can't make it on your own)
Ideally, Marines fought in numbers, and that was how they were trained. They used formations, had rules to follow, and relied in cooperation to take down pirates, at least the rank and file. They were also used to fighting in open spaces.
Soon during Saki's sword training, the Old Man had realized that this didn't apply, since she'd be alone, and remarkably smaller than most people who tried to kill her, and she'd have to defend herself in the cramped alleys of their dingy town. Parry, sidestep, and hope the enemy eats dirt thanks to momentum had been some of the smartest advice Saki had been given when learning how to fight.
She had never seen her size as a disadvantage when trying to stay alive, because the smaller one was, the easier it was to go unseen, and to be underestimated, and use that to her own profit. But circumstances had changed.
So Saki regretted, if only marginally, that the Old Man had never really taken the time to teach her how to watch out for enemies that came from every direction, but, on the other hand, there was another piece of advice that had proved to be useful consistently.
As said before, Marines had to follow rules. She didn't need to. In fact, she was highly encouraged not to.
Standing on the deck of an enemy ship, she held her sword in front of her, facing the man rushing towards her, and instead of trying to block the blow, she stepped aside at the last moment, put forward a leg, and the man tripped on it and onto the other pirate that was approaching her from behind.
She thought she managed to pull off pretty cool things sometimes, but sadly no one was looking to see it, and she moved onto the nearest poor sod that looked distracted.
The island where the other pirate crew – whose name still eluded them – had brought Uni and Asuka was so small that one could stand in its middle and throw a rock across it, and from the Polar Tang, Bepo was able to make out campfires on the snowy shore. Two ships were docked nearby, flying diamond-shaped Jolly Rogers, and one of them was recognizable as the one they had seen in Niva.
The Heart Pirates had sailed to their destination underwater, and gotten as close to the ships as possible without running aground. Since it was likelier that their companions were in one of the ships instead of the shore, specifically in the one that had been in Niva, Law ordered Bepo to surface, and Saki was able to add to her collection of pirate experiences boarding an enemy ship.
She may have enjoyed the moment better, reminiscing about the swashbuckling adventure books she had read, if the cold from the cave hadn't set in her bones, if she wasn't bruised, or if she wasn't impatient to get this over with and sit down with a pencil and paper before she forgot some part of what she had painstakingly memorized.
However, if someone on that deck had enough salt in him to fill the five seas and the legendary All Blue, it was Penguin, who was swinging his spear like a baseball bat at the pirates' heads. Saki made sure not to step too close to him in case he couldn't tell friend from foe anymore, and when the deck was reasonably clean and the perimeter around Penguin still reeked of danger, she busied herself sniping at the boats of pirates that approached from the shore with the weapons of their fallen comrades.
That meant she was throwing blades at them, because while there may have been a few pistols strewn around, she had never fired one, and she didn't doubt for a second that she would manage to injure herself in the most stupid way imaginable.
Instead, Mack gave took the chance to give her the promised master class on throwing knives.
"The key is in the wrist," he said, staring at Saki, moving it back and forth as he held a small blade between his fingers, and then he threw it without even looking. Someone yelped down there. "Once you've got that down, the rest is muscle memory. Try it."
Saki's fingers were kind of numb when she took another knife from Mack, and she didn't trust herself not to stab her own hand with it. Mimicking Mack's earlier movements, she aimed at a boat were two guys were frantically padding away and flung it. It hit one on the back with the handle.
"You need more practice," Mack said. Though he didn't sound pleased, the assessment didn't seem to carry any disapproval, so Saki guessed she hadn't done so badly. At least she had hit something, right?
He tossed two more knives as nonchalantly as assault can be committed, and those hit as intended.
"Found them!" Shachi yelled then from the other ship, and disappeared below the deck in a rush.
Saki and Mack jumped over the railings onto the other ship, and when they started to descend the stairs, they saw Uni heading up with messier hair than usual and fuming. They stopped short of bumping into Shachi mid-staircase.
The wood creaked painfully with each of Uni's steps. "Tell me you've left some for me!"
"I thought you'd be more beat up," Saki said, stepping to the side to get out of his way. She wasn't one to get between a man and his revenge.
After him, walking at a slower pace, was Asuka, and right behind Bepo followed with two tentative paws outstretched, in case his companion tumbled down. Asuka didn't look as hot as Uni, sporting a black eye and a split lip. "Masks block hits."
Saki thought this was a fine moment to refrain from being a smartass, since she wasn't wearing a mask, either.
Mack seemed to have lost all sense of urgency when he saw both rescuees walking out on their own. "How did they get you?"
"From behind and being fifteen to twenty, mostly," Asuka said, annoyed. "Where's Tuttu?"
"In the sickbay, which is where you—" Law began to say, but he was interrupted by a loud string of curses coming from above.
Asuka looked up, alarmed, "Enemies!?"
He ran out before anyone could tell him the likely source of the outburst, and they didn't have to wait long until Asuka joined Uni's rant.
There was an uncomfortable beat of silence as Shachi pulled down the brim of his cap, shadowing his face, and solemnly walked outside as well.
"Was there anybody else inside?" Saki asked once he was out of sight.
"Just one guy keeping watch in the cells."
"Cells? Really?" She said under her breath. She understood the necessity of having those in a Marine ship, but the kind of pirate that set out to get a ship with cells wasn't one Saki wanted anything to do with.
"I asked him about this captain before Bepo kicked his teeth in, and turns out he isn't here."
Mack spoke before Saki had a chance to. "Where, then?"
"He didn't know. The bastard took off with a ship and left the others here."
"Then what was the point of this? Didn't he want the map?"
"He probably thought better about messing with us," Bepo said.
It made sense, but it didn't convince Saki. She guessed by Mack's frown and Law's silence that it was the case for them, too. Why go as far as taking two of them hostage to just run away in the end? And leaving so many men behind… then again, one could safely assume that a few dozen men could take care of a crew as small as the Heart Pirates. One who hadn't seen Law in action or a very pissed off Penguin, that was.
"So what's the plan now?" Saki asked.
"We search the ships, take anything that looks useful, and get back to the Polar Tang."
"And the idiots that are still on the shore?"
"Leave that to me."
Saki didn't question Law and headed back to the other ship with Mack, but she found out what he meant when she dropped off a crate full of medical supplies on the deck of the Polar Tang and proceeded to watch Law extend his Room and cut down a piece off a ship with a single stroke of his nodachi. The second one went down just as easily, wood planks splashing against the water and objects spilling out of the section of the ship. It was a matter of time until the ocean claimed them and dragged them to its depths.
"Who has the map?" Law asked in general.
Penguin replied that he had, and Law extended a hand to him to hand it over. As soon as Penguin complied, he tore it in half, balled the papers and threw them overboard.
Much whining from the mechanic crew ensued, but he rested Kikoku against his shoulder, put his other hand in his jeans' pocket, and turned his attention to the slowly sinking ships like one watches a pleasant sunset.
Saki knew he had been training to increase the radius of his Room, and as proven by recent events, it was already wide enough to reach other ships if Law was standing on the sub's deck. If it had been like this back in Qaryn, he would have reached Jerkface in time.
Saki was surprised by her own thoughts, because it sounded like she was blaming him for what happened when he had already done more than he should have, considering that man had meant nothing to them.
She picked up the crate again, unintentionally glancing at her right wrist, where the bangle Banu had given her was hidden by long sleeves. If there was someone to blame for that, it was her for getting caught off guard. Some of the guys cheered on Law, but this time Saki couldn't feel as euphoric over payback as she should have. It had been a long day, and she'd done a lot of thinking. She kept determining that that didn't do her any good, and she kept doing it anyway.
Bepo was near the door, which showed signs of an unsuccessful attempt to open it, and had been hastily fixed by a murderous Penguin when they'd had to go underwater.
He was holding up a crate of his own as he stared at Law. Saki stopped near her fluffy companion.
"He's getting better."
Bepo made an appreciative sound. "He's been training hard," he replied.
"I can see that," she said softly, and after some thought, she added. "I don't envy him."
Bepo blinked and turned his head towards her. "Why do you say that?"
"Because he needs to be at his best all the time, and keep getting stronger for our sakes. He always tells me that it's his duty to take care of us. That would be hard even if we weren't pirates. It's a lot of pressure to put on a single person."
And there was that debt he had mentioned and that he was willing to settle at all costs. Too many things weighing on him. She understood now all too well why Bepo felt like he had to look after him. She was wary of leaving him to his own devices, too, and how long had it been since they had met? A little less than half a year? It felt like a whole life, in some ways.
To think she had been afraid of him, at first. It was laughable.
"He tells you that?" Bepo said, ignoring her reasoning.
Saki was confused by that. "Is that weird?"
Bepo contemplated his answer, looking towards Law once again before speaking. "One day, you and I will have a talk."
"O… kay?" She said, unsure of what had prompted that reaction. That furball hid a lot of mysteries.
He hummed, and with a short nod, he smiled at Saki. "C'mon, hurry inside. It's cold for humans out here."
"Are you getting cheeky with me, Bepo? Am I seeing a trend here?"
"No talking back, sailor. In you go before you get sick and give Captain extra work."
She shook her head, but did as he said. Partly. She did talk back. "I'm fine."
Everything hurt as she walked down the stairs. The tumble down the gorge hadn't been kind to her.
"I'm sure you are," Bepo said.
—
She wasn't fine at all when she woke up in the morning. Or rather, when she was woken up by a rather badly-tattooed hand on her shoulder.
In better circumstances, she would have shrieked and slapped it away, but it felt like too much work. It was a nice hand, too. Easily fixable. How irritating.
She had fallen asleep on her desk, and she had a cheek stuck to a page of one of the volumes that Hilda had given her. Strewn all over the wood surface were the papers where she had transcribed the symbols she had memorized from the stone, and some of the other books. It had seemed like a great idea to look for clues last night after she was done writing.
On a good day, she would have jolted awake the moment she heard the steps right outside her room. But it wasn't a good day, and her body ached from the bad posture and something else, her head thrummed, and it was hard to open her eyes to try to take a good look at her captain, or at her clock, and she was too tired to even wonder why her body felt like it was made of lead.
She managed to focus her vision enough to tell that Law was displeased.
"Sorry," she said without thinking, mainly because she was too tired to do so.
He frowned harder. That was a bad sign.
"Why?"
"Dunno," she mumbled. "You look like I should apologize."
The hand on her shoulder suddenly moved to her forehead, and she winced under the cold touch.
"You're hot," he muttered.
"Tell me something new," she replied.
Law looked at her like she was stupid. "You're running a fever."
"…Oh."
That made a lot of sense. It certainly explained why Law was in her room without her letting him in first, and it also explained why she hadn't heard him knocking at all.
Because she was sure he had. The others didn't anymore, but it would be weird if he stopped now.
She tried to recall if she had done anything that warranted catching a bad cold, and she remembered getting buried twice by snow and spending hours in a frozen cave like it was a distant memory. That could have had something to do with it.
Was it late? She glanced at the clock, but the handles refused to point just at one number.
"What hour…?"
"Eight in the morning."
"Shit," she said immediately, and pushed herself up with a heavy effort, staggering. "Tell Mack I'll be—"
Law took her by the shoulders before she could try to stumble her way to the galley and redirected her a couple of steps left, towards her bed. "Sick. For about a week. Forget about cooking."
"Nooo."
"Saki. Go to sleep."
She realized then that he wasn't angry. He was worried.
She'd rather have him annoyed at her.
With no warning, she dropped onto the bed, startling Law. "Bepo was right," she said.
She had gotten sick and added more onto Law's plate. She would stew in her own misery if it didn't require so much work.
"What about?"
"That's between us."
And she, too, had so many things to do. Books to check. Questions to ask Hilda and Ruddy. Snowmen to build before the only water around her was again liquid and salty. She had to ask Law if there had been anything useful in the Devil Fruit guide. If there had been any leads within the fruits themselves. Had she been useful at all these last few weeks?
She didn't doubt Law could have found out anything he needed without her help, anyway. She felt like more trouble than she was worth, between getting ill and what Hilda had dropped on her about her mom.
"Has he been bothering you?" Law asked, watchful.
"Bepo is unable to bother," she said, suppressing a yawn. "He watches. He helps. He worries about you."
There was a delay in the reply, but his tone was softer. "I know."
Saki closed her eyes. "I want to help too, but you don't want help, and you're trying to do something dangerous and I don't know what to do or tell you. And now I'm here." She lifted an arm and dropped it dead on the mattress. "Sick. Taking up space. I'll sleep the fever off. Go do your thing. I'll be fine."
"Not if your legs are hanging down from the bed."
"Stop being smart," she whined. "I can't think straight."
"Get in bed. I'll be back."
She vaguely remembered changing into pajamas and slipping under the bed sheets, but not him coming back.
He must have, though, because when she woke up a few hours later, there were pills and water on top of her clothes' chest, and a thermometer, and the chair of her desk was pulled up near the bed and an offensively old Devil Fruit guidebook rested on top of it, open on a page that showed a swirly blue mango.
She didn't have the strength to move to take the medicine, so she went back to sleep, and she had a recurring nightmare about snow, an empty submarine, and being alone.
—
It had been a split second decision, and it had paid off handsomely.
When his men had told him what they'd found while the skulked around Niva's docks, he didn't believe them until one of them put a blue fruit on his hand.
He had ordered the crew that sailed his own personal ship to and make a quick nightly incursion into the town and left the others behind to take care of the Heart Pirates when they showed up.
He had expected the rest of his crew, two ships' worth, to be enough to handle the Surgeon of Death's attack. Hours later, standing on the deck of his remaining ship among the wreckage of the other two, and watching the survivors on the shore crying for help, he found out that he'd been wrong, but he couldn't say everything had gone so bad.
The crates they had taken from that godforsaken shack were the biggest treasure they could have laid their hands on, much better than anything that old map could point them to. With those Devil Fruits, he would be set for life.
Losing two thirds of his crew in a night was a regrettable thing, but in every island there were always men willing to join a successful pirate crew.
Before any Marines could be sent to round up what was left of them, captain Diamonds Theo sailed away from the archipelago where he had spent the last weeks making everybody's life difficult, with a smile that showed his rhomboid teeth and an Eternal Pose that pointed to his favorite island. Next stop, Jaya.
—
Saki wasn't the only one who had come down with a fever. Shachi also ended up in bed coughing up a lung, and though Penguin wasn't sick, for a few days he was feeling like a mountain had fallen on top of him, which was too close to what had actually happened for comfort. If Law took into account the rest of the injured guys, he had to admit it was a good thing they had to spend one last week in Niva before they could set out for somewhere else. This way, the ones who were sick could stay in the sub, while the others could stay at the inn and make repairs to the Polar Tang. He caught himself glaring more than usual at the dock workers that passed by, and still he had been the one who had to intervene when one of them stared funny at the graffiti and Uni decided to defend their honor by proving that a blowtorch was mightier than the Nivan's alcoholic breath.
Saki was out cold for three days until the fever relented, and that made Law overconfident. He realized his mistake when he knocked on her door on the fourth day, she told her to come in, and the smell of shampoo and shower gel hit him as he turned the doorknob.
He glared at her like she had been the one to vandalize the submarine. "I'm going to tie you to a bed until you learn to behave."
"I've heard that threat a few times," she said, sheets drawn up to her nose, watching him shiftily.
Law decided to ignore a mutter coming from under the bed cover and that suspiciously sounded like 'kinky.' "Maybe it's time I made good on it."
"I was disgusting. I wanted to change the bed sheets too, but I'm sore." And she yawned.
"Color me surprised." He walked to the chair near Saki, picked up the Devil Fruit guide on it, bonked her on the head with it, and put it at the feet of the bed as he plopped down.
"You're mean," she said, sitting up and rubbing her forehead.
"And you're a dumbass, so it evens out," he said drily.
She laughed a little at that. "See, that's where you're wrong. Stupid people don't get sick."
"Shachi's come down with the flu, too." Never mind the inexistent scientific basis for that belief, but given the choice between logic and a burn, Law knew the former had a better chance of working.
"Exception to the rule," she rebuked. "There's always one."
"Who's to say it's him?"
Judging by the ensuing silence, that one had hit home. She threw her hands up briefly and said, resigned, "Sure, kick me while I'm down."
He cracked a smile at that. That made her stare with open curiosity.
"Are you in a better mood?" Saki asked.
She didn't look pale anymore, cheeks slightly flushed from the shower, but the dark rings under her eyes betrayed a lack of rest.
He realized he had been staring after she cocked her head to the side, still staring, and he hurried to say, "As compared to…?"
"The time you spent locked up in the sickbay. I know the fruit stuff was important to you, but you looked like you'd gone to three funerals in a row and were getting ready for the fourth."
She hadn't meant anything by it, she couldn't have, but he could nonetheless put a face to each of those funerals.
"Well, that's over now," he said, trying to rest importance to it. He hadn't meant to worry anybody. Worrying was his job, not the others'. "And I've got news," he added, hoping that she wouldn't insist.
He knew it had worked when she perked up. "Good or bad?"
He wasn't sure what to reply. They probably were on the mildly interesting to worrying spectrum. "More like unexpected and expected."
"Oh. Hit me with the first one." Her eyes twinkled with the excitement of someone who had passed the last 72 hours skirting the limit between never-ending boredom and feverish delirium. Hours were slow in the sub when no one else was around.
"Ruddy was looking for us a couple of days ago to ask if we had taken more fruits from the warehouse."
"You had?" She asked automatically, but upon second thought, she said, "Didn't he throw away the rest of the cargo?"
He crossed his arms and leaned back against the chair. "Apparently, he had been waiting for the results of our investigation, in case we needed more samples."
"How… helpful."
"It's a vested interest. He doesn't know how to take off the antlers yet."
Her posture relaxed and she let out a quiet snort. "That makes sense."
"To answer your other question, I haven't been there since we took the fruits." And if he had, it would have been for no other reason than to set that shack on fire. "Ruddy went to get rid of the remaining ones after I told him what model he had eaten, and he found a busted lock and not a single crate."
Despite the fever being gone, Saki wasn't yet to full speed. She stared blankly at nowhere for a few seconds in silence. "Was it that pirate crew? Who were they, anyway?"
"You're the expert," he said. He didn't particularly care. They had been in the way, and then swiftly removed. The world was full of insignificant people, though a few less since a bunch of nights ago.
Saki's eyes narrowed into slits from the effort. Law wanted to tell her to stop thinking before she broke something. "I'll check the posters later," she said. "But was it them?"
Law shrugged. "We think so. Remember how the captain was missing? His ship probably stopped by Niva while we were out."
"But we would have seen them, assuming he made his way from that other island—"
"Not necessarily. It was dark, we were underwater and maybe they didn't take the shortest path."
It took her a few seconds to process everything. "Yeah, I guess that makes sense," she admitted. "So is this a problem?"
"Not for us, but whoever tries to fence them will be dead as soon it reaches certain ears."
"Good thing Ruddy didn't try anything with them."
Law caught himself agreeing with her before he remembered that he didn't care at all for that man, and wondered if being a bleeding heart was contagious. He changed the subject, slightly weirded out by this development. "I confirmed the theory about the fruits, by the way."
"They are artificial? How could you tell?"
"They are identical copies. Multiple Devil Fruits of the same kind aren't possible, to begin with, so two of them matching to that extent…"
"Was there any info in the guidebook?"
"There was," he replied. "It was classified as the Deer Deer Fruit, Moose model, and at the time the book was written there was no known user. I would assume that, at some point, someone got their hands on the real one and found a way to synthetize more of them from it." There was also an old market price, and it was higher than in the invoice we found, so even without taking into account the inflation over the years, it's impossible that they are original."
Again, all he got at first was a blank stare, but Saki sounded pleased she said, "That's something."
"It is." And as an afterthought, because he had been kind of a jerk when he had been handed the book, he said, "Thanks."
She waved him off. "Don't. Finding that book was a matter of pride."
His lack of acknowledgement had bothered her before, though, so that was probably modesty showing. In her. That was a novel thought.
"Not at the beginning, though," he said.
"Eh, can't say I'm against getting one over Joker."
Law sometimes forgot that he wasn't the only person in the sub with a bone to pick with that man. But contrary to him, Saki didn't seem to be directing her resentment at him. It seemed like she was able to let go of the things that hurt her with relative ease, and it wasn't the case for him.
"Do you…" He started, and regretted it as soon as he did, so he decided to shut up.
But she didn't want to let him. "Do I?"
"It doesn't matter."
"It evidently does," she said with disbelief.
He was hesitant about asking, but it was pointless to dance around the subject when asked point blank. It had been a stupid question, anyway. "I was wondering if you had a grudge against Joker."
She blinked, and her eyes lowered to her hands on her lap while thought about it. "I should, shouldn't I? I really should."
"But you don't," he followed.
"There's no sense in holding grudges. I don't have it in me anymore."
So she had, before.
"Forgive and forget?"
"Neither," she replied, shaking her head slowly. "They're just… not worth the price."
Law fell silent, reminded of the brief conversation they'd had in the sickbay when they had retrieved the Devil Fruits.
"You know what's disgusting about grudges?" She continued, looking up at him. "There's no winning. You either carry them forever and become bitter about them, or you get your revenge, and when you do, there's nothing left. Suddenly there's a big empty space where the hate used to be and you are lost without it."
Law almost said that it was easy to say when she had killed the man who had murdered her father, but caught himself in time to think that maybe she was speaking from experience.
He had never gotten the impression that she had gone through an existential crisis when she joined the crew, but as always, looks could be deceiving.
"What would you do if you had even the slightest chance of getting back at the people who hurt your family?" He had spoken without realizing that he was, in a sense, looking for validation. And, in a sense, he knew before she answered that they wouldn't see eye to eye on the matter.
He couldn't put anything past him. Not now, not ever.
Saki let out a soft breath. "At what cost? Whatever I did wouldn't bring them back. Besides…"
Law stared at her, waiting for the end of the sentence. She stared back for a moment, then turned her back to him, lay down, and buried half of her face in the pillow.
Denied.
"Out with it."
"No. You're depressing me."
Law lifted his hat to run a hand through his hair and put it on as he stared at the back of her head. "I wasn't thinking when I brought up your family."
She groaned, sounding like strangling him was a tempting course of action, and sat up to glare daggers at him. "My family? Seriously? How dense can you be? You're supposed to be the smart one!"
He was taken off guard by the sudden aggressiveness. "What's gotten into you?"
"I can't believe I have to spell this out for you," she said very fast and quiet, incredulity painfully obvious. "My family is here now, and my home is this submarine. Why would I risk what I have for something I can't take back no matter how much I try?"
A knot formed in Law's throat, and he was tempted to stand up and get out of the room because there was no way to answer that, and the only thing that kept him from doing so was that he had dug that grave himself.
Getting a crew had been a means to an end, at first. A matter of survival. A way to sail the Grand Line finding safety in numbers, perhaps having fun along the way, until his objective was within reach and he could…
He could… do what, exactly?
Tossing them aside wasn't an option. It had never been an option, if he was honest with himself. Passing the torch onto Bepo and going off on his own was the most likely one.
If he had been another kind of person, he could have gotten them involved. He could have used them against Doflamingo and stood a better chance against him. And when he entertained the idea, he hated that he wasn't that kind of person.
But when he looked at Saki's piercing green eyes staring him down, and at the new tattoo on her right forearm, he wasn't sure what was worse, trying to use them against an enemy that was far beyond their joint ability, or telling them to go on without him.
It had only been half a year since North Blue, and he couldn't imagine a life outside his submarine, without his crew. He didn't want to. Saki was right. Everybody had helped build their ship into home.
She spared him the need to reply, and she didn't look angry anymore. Like she had deflated after the outburst, as she was wont to do when she thought she had bothered him. But she didn't try to backpedal this time. Quite the contrary. "I know I'm missing most of the picture, but there's something I can tell you: that man isn't worth your attention, your time or your life. He'll never be. The fact that you're after him is proof of it."
"How so?" He said dispassionately. He didn't feel like arguing back at this point. He wasn't even looking at her anymore. His hands looked like a better choice.
She took the opportunity to bop him in the forehead with an accusing index finger, and he had to look up.
"Because you are a good person, no matter much how you want to hide it, and it would take something horrible for you to hold a grudge like this."
"I owe someone," he said, and he was surprised at how strangled his voice sounded. "I can't let it go."
"Is that someone alive?" She asked softly.
"No."
The ensuing silence rang in his ears, hollow and insufferable.
"I get it." Saki said, downcast. "Those are the worst debts. You never know when you're done paying them back."
Law took a breath that sounded sharper than he had intended.
When had he become an open book to her?
He almost spoke of Cora-san. He almost told her what he had done for him, and who his brother was, and why he wanted to keep her out of it, and why telling her would defeat the point of it.
But he hesitated, and she didn't grant him the opportunity to explain himself. Instead, she outstretched a hand towards him, face up, waiting for him to place his hand on hers.
He did, watching her expectantly.
Such a travesty would have been unthinkable only a few months ago.
She squeezed his hand and said, "Don't tell me. I don't need to know. But if you think this is something you must do, let me help."
"You don't know what—"
She cut him off. "I don't care. It's important to you."
His hand twitched in hers. "How is that enough?"
"Because there's no stopping you when you are set on something, and because I'll be damned if I watch you lose yourself to whatever mess you're in when I could have helped. You are not alone. You shouldn't have to act like you are."
She spoke like he mattered, and he didn't know how to face someone who put more value on his life than he did.
He wanted to pull his hand away and tell her to leave him be. He wanted to pull her close and steal a kiss before she regretted holding his hand and looking at him like he was irreplaceable. Before she found out that the crew had been nothing but an excuse to get to Doflamingo, and that becoming Pirate King was such a faraway dream that it sounded like a lie in his head. He had promised her a future he wouldn't live to see.
"Please," she insisted.
He hated how she could make him question everything. He hated how she was able to cut past the surface, past veins and blood and muscle and stubborn determination with clinical precision to hit where it mattered most.
But that was also why he leaned in, until his head was against hers and his lips were nearly brushing her ear, eyes closed, hand now holding hers, too, for a moment that felt too long and short at once. She had stilled at the contact, and she was holding her breath, but all of that seemed to be drowned by the sound of his heart pounding and a faint scent of tangerines.
"Thank you," he whispered against her ear, lingering after he did, but he still drew back before she could move or say anything.
Saki seemed to relax as soon as he was at a prudent distance, and her gaze followed Law as he walked towards the door.
"Hold it right there!" She said. "You haven't given me an answer."
He didn't stop or turn around so she could see the small smile drawn on his face. "Make of it what you will."
"Cheater," he heard her say, dejected, as he closed the door.
He closed his eyes, took a silent breath, and made for his room, intent on not seeing anybody else for the remainder of the day.
—
Saki was good to go the next morning. The sub was mostly empty while the guys spent the last hours in Niva stocking up on consumables and possibly drinking themselves to a stupor before they had to work again.
But someone hadn't been able to go.
Saki skulked over to the hallway she never went to, because she had no business there.
The door to the man's quarters was cracked open, and though the windows were closed, there was a bedside lamp lighting the room.
"Are you alive?" She said from behind the door.
Right away, she heard shuffling around and something falling to the floor.
"What are you doing here?!" Shachi yelled. His voice had the telltale signs of someone who wasn't yet clear of a head cold. "You can't come in! It's forbidden!"
"By whom?" She asked. She certainly hadn't been told anything of the sort by Law, possibly because she had showed zero interest in snooping around other people's quarters. But come to think of it, this was the sort of thing that was probably a rule in other crews.
Whatever. They never knocked on her door. She should have been the one complaining.
Shachi was likely thinking along the same lines, because he made a pause before retorting, "By us! No women allowed!"
"Are looking at porn, Shachi?"
"No!" He spluttered.
"You sound kind of guilty!"
"Come in already," he groaned.
The last time Saki had been in this part of the ship, Bepo had been its only inhabitant. It had looked unnaturally clean and too wide for a single person.
Now that the bunks had been claimed by more owners, the beds were undone, clothes were strewn all over boxes and wooden trunks, and suspicious contents poked from under mattresses. Only one bed looked used but immaculate, and Saki would have bet good money that it belonged to Mack.
Shachi looked miserable in his pajamas, without his cap and with his hair sticking in every direction. Saki had escaped the most annoying symptoms by instead getting KO'd by fever. He, on the other hand, seemed to have been hit by the opposite.
"I dropped my glasses when you knocked and can't see shit." He admitted. Indeed, Saki saw his sunglasses on the floor. That explained why he was squinting.
"That was the problem?" She said, bending down to pick them up and pass them to him.
"Letting your guard down near the enemy is a bad idea," he said, taking the glasses from her and putting them on. "Much better."
"What was it again? Photosensibility and…?"
"Astigmatism. With nearsightedness sprinkled on top."
"That sucks."
"Yeah. So, what did you want? Come to laugh at me?"
"Well." She paused. "Yeah."
Shachi's smile dropped. "Fuck you."
She pointed backwards towards the door with a thumb. "I'm going out. Do you want anything from town?"
"Nah, I already sent Peng on an errand."
"Okay. I'll be going then. I want to say goodbye before we leave."
Shachi looked mildly impressed. "I thought you were going to rub it in some more."
"I think getting healthy first is the best dig I could take at you."
"That's true." He sighed. "You should have heard the others. 'Ooh, look at the tough guy from North Blue getting sick! I thought they were immune to the cold! Maybe they should eat more coconut to build up defenses!'"
Saki's reaction was immediate. "Set their beds on fire."
"Could spread to mine. Can you do something to their food?"
"Mack would end me."
He fell in thought. "I'll think of something. But not now."
"Yeah," Saki smiled. "Sleep all you can before we sail away."
"Will do." He took off his sunglasses again, put them next to the lamp and dropped on his pillow. "Thanks for the visit."
"No problem. See ya!"
"Try to survive Hilda."
Saki left the room with a snort and headed upstairs with a spring in her step.
It felt so good to be out of bed.
She briefly crossed paths with Law, who gave her the stink eye when he saw her on her way outside, but she was wearing a coat and a scarf and gloves and boots and they were leaving in one or two days at most, so she suspected he went easy on her so she could step on land one last time before being at sea for weeks.
Or maybe he didn't want to talk much to her after their last conversation. Saki herself wasn't sure how to take what had happened or what he had meant by it. She only knew she hadn't minded, and…
It was not the time to think about it.
She tried to find Ruddy once she hit the town, but he wasn't at the docks, so she changed her plans and took a walk to Hilda's store. She didn't feel like being in there, memories of coughing dust for days still vivid, but it was only right that she dropped by to say goodbye. Saki didn't think they would see each other again, but Hilda had given her something she thought she had lost forever. A piece of the enigma that had been her mom, kept safe and loved in a corner of the Grand Line.
Luckily for Saki, she killed two birds with one stone when she found Ruddy smoking in front of the shop.
"Morning, lass." He said with a grin. "Feeling better?"
"Amazing." She mirrored his expression. "My captain told me you had trouble at the warehouse."
"Ah, well, what can you do. Pirates." He let out a puff of smoke. "No offense."
"Hey, I'll take that as a badge of honor."
"It's good being proud of who you are." He nodded. "You need anything? Any reading material?"
"I was hoping to find you and Hilda, actually. We're leaving soon."
"Come to say goodbye?" He asked, eyebrows arching. "That's nice of you. I wouldn't have heard the end of it from the missus if you hadn't."
"I couldn't leave just like that," she said. "You've been a big help."
"We've helped you kill time in this place, all right," he said gruffly, but he couldn't hold back a pleased smile. "Not much to do for seasoned adventurers, huh?"
"Yeah… well. There was something."
"There was?"
Saki looked around her. As usual, there was nobody in the street but them, but she didn't know if she should say what she wanted to. Her mom hadn't told them what she had found, so who was her, who had just met them, to make the opposite call?
But her mom had told them she had found something. She could risk that much.
"Can we talk inside? I don't want to explain myself twice."
"Sure." He put out the cigarette against the snow on the bench and pocketed what remained of it before turning towards the door of the shop.
Hilda was behind the counter, looking sour as ever, but the expression of her face softened for a second when she saw Saki. It was so brief, it was easy to chalk it up to her imagination, though.
Hilda got up from her seat and walked up to Saki.
"Hey!" She greeted her with a smile.
Hilda paused momentarily before starting to pat her arms, body, pinch her side and taking her face into her hands to inspect it from every angle.
Saki started flailing her arms, because she wanted to swat her away but was also trying really hard not to be rude.
"Hilda, let the kid go. She's healthy as a horse."
Hilda stepped back reticently and crossed her arms. Her magnified eyes only made the glare she was sending Saki more prominent.
"What was that about?" Saki asked, feeling assaulted.
"She was worried, is all," Ruddy replied.
"I'm not trustin' that greenhorn to keep her healthy," Hilda spat, walking back to her spot. She picked up a thermos and a mug from under the counter, filled the mug, and handed it forcefully to Saki. "Drink this."
Saki took it, confused. "He's a doctor."
"And I'm a nun. Drink."
"No, really—"
"Pah. Every ship thinks they've got a good doctor, 'til the quack actually needs to work an' suddenly the crew starts droppin' like flies. They don' know nothin'."
Ruddy clucked his tongue. "Stop getting your granny panties in a bunch, Hilda. The lad's not that bad."
"That Marine wasn' that bad either, an' look what happened to Du! What's the use of bein' not that bad if when push comes to shove they let 'em die?"
Saki's grip on the mug tightened unconsciously. She hadn't thought Hilda worried so much about her well-being, but the accusations she was flinging at Law didn't sit well with her, either. "He saved my life," she blurted out before she even realized what she was saying, and she decided that might as well tell the story when she immediately caught the attention of the bickering couple. "Right after we met. I was dying and he operated me when other doctors couldn't." She tapped her chest lightly, right where her heart was. "He's the only one who could have pulled it off. He isn't just good, he's the best." And then she said with fake annoyance. "And I don't like to hear people badmouthing my captain."
"I'll vouch for that," Ruddy said with a cheeky grin. "There you go, straight form the horse's mouth. Lad's dependable."
"Until he isn'," Hilda said weakly. "I don' trust 'im. You should stay 'ere with us and let those men go. They'll get you in trouble they can' pull you out of."
Saki smiled apologetically and laughed. "I don't really need help to get in trouble."
"All the more reason not to go!"
Saki wondered if her mom had had to deal with this before she left Niva, too. She had been there for over a year. She also wondered how much of this was Hilda trying to make her stay, and how much a way to recover a connection to the Dubia she had known.
Saki hadn't talked much about her mother after she disappeared. Her dad avoided the subject, and she learned not to bring it up to anybody. Seeing the kind of imprint she had left in other people made her feel more real than she had been ever since Saki was a kid, cooped up at home, sitting on her mother's knees as she went over books and told her stories of cities long gone.
Her mother had found another family in Niva; that much she could see. And Hilda and Ruddy must have found a daughter in her, too.
Saki had never met her grandparents, so she couldn't tell if this was how they were supposed to act with their grandchildren. The Old Man had always had a kind of hands-off policy towards kids.
"There's a good chance I'll make things complicated for you. And…" She scratched her head, recalling the events of the other day, "There's something I've got to do."
"That's right. She was here to tell us something before you went off on your tirade," Ruddy said.
"Hmm." Hilda took another mug from under the counter and poured a cup for herself. "Are you drinking?"
Saki hurried to take a gulp. It was warm, sweet, and tasted like cinnamon, lemon and clove. She stared at the mug. "My mom used to make this."
"She drank it by the gallon every day. The neighbor said her kid would be born dumb. As if that could be. Du had more smarts in one toenail than this entire town combined." And after that, Hilda clammed up again and took a sip from her mug.
Saki nodded absentmindedly, letting the smell of the drink bring up some nostalgia. "We found something the day of the avalanche."
"We heard you got caught in it," Ruddy said.
"Yeah, but it opened up a path. Temporarily, anyway. I think it's the same thing the expedition from Ohara was looking for. I'm not going to tell you what it was, though."
"Why?"
"Because my mom was way smarter than me and she never told you, either."
Hilda stared her in the eyes, silent at first, then said, "What are you goin' to do about it?"
"I'm not really sure. I can't do anything by myself." The admission stung. "I don't know the things she did and I don't think I could learn them by myself. But I think there's one person that can help."
"Jus' the one?"
"Probably."
"An' you're going to find 'em?"
"Yeah."
Hilda sighed. "And you think it's worth the danger?"
"My mom thought it was."
"And she was smarter than all of us put together," Ruddy taunted Hilda, who scowled.
"And look what that got her!" Hilda retorted.
"But I'm not her," Saki said, prompting Hilda to close her mouth and press it until her lips were just a line. "You said my mom wouldn't have hurt a fly. I'm not her. I don't have half of her smarts, and not half of her goodwill either. I can fight, and I have people who'll help me." It felt strange to be able to say that sincerely and without a trace of a doubt. "I'll see this through as best as I can." She almost said she owed her at least that much, and her heart jumped when Law's words the previous day came back to mind. "No matter who gets in my way."
She had just argued with Law about risking too much for a personal objective and now she was telling an elderly couple that was worried about her, in so many words, that she was willing to face the World Government to continue her mother's work. A work she had no idea what it was about.
Hilda got her drift. "So that's it, huh? That's it. 'Nother kid gone for the greater good." She sounded tired, and sad, and for once, she looked her age, and Saki didn't know how to make it better without making promises she didn't intend to fulfill. But Hilda didn't want consolation and didn't need it, and the sadness came out as annoyance. "Stubborn as a mule," she muttered. "Had to run in the family, 'course."
"Maybe she got it from you?" Saki tried to joke. Hilda gave her an alarmed look, and Ruddy broke into laughter and patted Saki on the shoulder.
"Well said," he told her. There was a warm twinkle in his eyes. "Don't mind us, lass. We're old and tired. You have all the time in the world to settle down when you're done adventuring."
"Don't encourage her," Hilda warned.
"Stop being a spoilsport. She didn't come here to hear you whine."
Hilda grimaced, but stepped out from behind the counter again and looked straight at Saki. Her fragile-looking hands rested on her hips, gripping with unexpected strength. Saki almost feared she was going to get kidnapped so she couldn't leave with the others.
"Write to us when you got the time," Hilda said sternly. "An' when you get tired of sailin' with that good for nothin' bunch, come 'ere an' get a proper job stackin' books. Did Du teach you how to?"
Saki's mouth dropped a little, and she didn't know what to reply other than, "Yeah?"
Hilda didn't wait for her to find any other words. "Now wait here while I write somethin'. Give it to that cook of yours. And stay close to him. He's the only decent one in that tin can."
Saki couldn't hold back a smile. "I think you're right about that."
—
By the night before they left Niva, Saki had left the fever-induced nightmares behind for good. She dreamed of uncle Arthur teaching her how to use a needle, of the soothing rumble of the machine as she worked, of warm lips brushing her skin and not wanting to let them go away, and she got up because she wasn't able to sleep anymore.
She woke up to find Hilda's scrawled note pinned to a wall of the galley when she got there, and a cooking pot resting on the stove. Saki lifted the lid, and it smelled like an old home and her mom on late winter nights.
A loud yawn behind her made her jump and drop the lid, and she looked at the doorway to see a sleepy-looking Bepo watching her.
"You nearly gave me a heart attack," she said, and with a short glance at her chest said. "Well, maybe not."
"It has to work better than that now."
"It does. Hasn't bothered me in a while."
"That's good." He reached for a juice pitcher and shook it to make sure there was enough before looking for a glass.
"What are you doing up at this hour?"
"I stayed up tonight reviewing our route."
"When are we leaving?"
"As soon as everyone's awake. Penguin heard from someone at the inn that Marines are heading here and we need to get the hell out of…" He stifled another yawn, and in the process, he missed with the pitcher. "Ah!"
Saki went to the rescue with a kitchen rag. "You need to sleep."
"So do you, but I don't nag you about it."
Saki lifted her eyebrows at him.
He looked instantly apologetic. "Sorry. I get snappy when I'm tired."
"Don't worry about it."
They spent a few minutes in silence, Bepo drinking, Saki brewing coffee, and also trying to suppress the feeling that she had something to hide.
'You and I will have a talk', Bepo had said.
The feeling of Law's hand holding her own and his temple against hers, and him whispering in her ear came to mind and prompted a furious blush that she tried to hold back.
For a stupid, stupid moment back in her room, she had thought he was going to kiss her, and the tragedy was that she was disappointed he hadn't.
She hoped to every god in the Grand Line and beyond that Bepo's uncanny ability to read minds wasn't real, because there wasn't a big enough rock for her to crawl under with all her embarrassment.
She scrubbed insistently the surface where the juice had spilled to look busy, and casual, and to try not to think of every moment she had spent in close proximity to Law in the last few months, to no use.
Had he been flirting with her? Had she been flirting with him? Was Mack right all along and she was the only one who hadn't caught on?
She discarded that option, because she didn't know how to flirt seriously and without being intentionally cheesy, and Law had the social skills of a mashed potato.
She was thinking too much and giving to much importance to something that hadn't had any.
Right.
"That spot is clean," Bepo said, and it sounded like an accusation.
"Right," she repeated out loud, and put the rag aside.
"You're acting weird."
"Reality's always weird after you pull an all-nighter," she deflected.
"Maybe you're right." He said, setting the glass down. "But you don't look well. Are you red?"
Curse that bloody bear. "No."
"Maybe you should rest before we leave."
"What's with the early reunion?" Law asked, appearing at the doorway too, and Saki cursed out loud.
"I think she still has a fever," Bepo said.
"That's not true!" She shrieked.
"But—"
She pointed out. "Out of my kitchen, you mangy cur!"
Bepo became mighty offended. "I'm not a dog!"
"Bear, mink, whatever, out I said!"
"What's going on here?" Law asked blandly.
"And you too! Who do you think you are to step in here without Mack's permission?"
"The captain?"
"That only works for the rest of the ship."
Law conceded the point with a tilt of the head. "Bepo, leave her alone."
"But I wasn't doing anything wrong!"
"Easy, now. It's her that's a hazard this early."
Saki gave him an incredulous look.
Bepo was appeased by this, though. "I'll lie down a bit. Give me a heads up when everyone wakes up."
"Got it."
Bepo went away and left the two of them alone at a moment Saki really didn't want to be.
"What happened?" Law asked, turning to her.
"I take back what I said the other day," she replied, facing away from him to watch the coffee pot. "He was prying."
Law made a sound that she guessed was of acknowledgement. "That's not bad."
She glanced at him over her shoulder.
"He sticks his nose in places because he cares."
She looked back at the stove and crossed her arms defensively. "I know."
"Do you actually feel sick?"
"No."
"Why should I trust you over him?"
She turned around indignantly. "Law!"
He was smirking. Making fun of her at that ungodly hour where fun was simply not permitted.
"Remind me why I make your coffee every morning."
"Because it's the same you drink," he said, walking into the galley to take the pot from the stove. This was a transgression that only happened when Mack wasn't around, because he feared Law's mere presence near the fire would make the kitchen combust, and everybody thought it was a reasonable assumption, Law included.
She shifted a little to leave room for him. "Bepo said there are Marines on the way," she said conversationally.
There was nothing strange in the way he acted around her. He was the same as always, and that put her at ease.
She could act like always. It was a shift in paradigm what scared her.
"Looks like it. Someone reported the thefts at the docks were done by pirates," he said nonchalantly. "We had to leave anyway, so the sooner, the better." He turned his attention to the cooking pot on the stove. "What's that?"
Saki lifted the lid so the scent wafted out. "Hilda gave Mack this recipe."
He closed his eyes as he tried to identify the smell. "Well," he determined after a few seconds, "maybe she isn't that bad. Even if she's insufferable."
"Why do you say that?"
"It's tea for cold. Lemon, cinnamon and clove. Clove has analgesic properties, though only when the oil's applied directly, but it helps with digestion, and there's probably honey in there too for sore—" He stopped when he glanced at her. "What?"
Saki's lips had curled into a tiny smile while she was listening. "You're kind of cute when you're nerding out."
He blushed. She only saw it for the smallest fraction of a second because he lowered his hat and took his mug and made a swift departure from the galley, but he didn't fling any threats at her, and that made her smile get bigger.
"Did you get the newspaper?" She asked innocently.
"Go get it yourself."
She snickered. What a sourpuss.
She poured a coffee for herself and leaned her back against the wall, closing her eyes and listening to the sound of the waves outside. It was still silent enough that it wasn't drowned out by the noise of daily life.
"Remember the tattoo we talked about?"
She peered at the mess hall tentatively. "This isn't about your fingers, is it?"
"No."
"Damn. Then it's about my birthday?"
"…If you want to take it like that."
She let out a laugh and straightened her back, resting her free hand against her hip. "So? What do you want?"
"Our Jolly Roger. I think it's long overdue."
Saki could feel the bubbles of excitement from a new project building up. She had been aching to do something new, and used as she had been to having customers every other day, she felt like she had been getting rusty since she started sailing. "How big?"
"I wanted to ask you about that," he said, idly tapping the handle of his mug. "I guess you'd know better what to do."
"Well, it's round, so theoretically it could be as big as you're wide. But it's symmetric, so unless the shape's perfect it will look off. It's better to draw the topmost lines between your shoulder blades so the circle can rest below, because if it went over them the shape would look deformed when you moved your arms, and if we're leaving some space at the top you'd need to do the same on both sides so there's an equili…" She trailed off when she noticed that there was a sarcastic smile on his face. "What?" She asked, suspicious. "What did I do now?"
"Nothing. It's just that you're cute when you're nerding out."
"Ass," she said, and unable to be truly annoyed at the comment, she went back into the galley to finish her coffee while Law chuckled in the background.
She thought it was a nice laugh.