Thank you all for your kind words and lovely reviews! It reminds me that the hours I spent finishing this story were not wasted hours :) Now, for Chapter 6, as promised.
It happened when Bella least expected it.
Alice had traded places with Jasper a few hours ago. Hours that she and Alice had filled by sharing their stories of months since that fateful September, and Alice was kind enough not to mention whenever Bella fell asleep and woke back up in the midst of a conversation.
It happened when Bella felt surrounded by love and family, even if she was separated from them by distance. It happened when Bella felt safe.
Alice had seen her yawning again and used it as an opportunity to go check on the boys. "I'll be right back," she'd said. "I can't see them because Jacob is there, so I just want to make sure they haven't killed each other yet." Even though Bella rolled her eyes at that, Alice seemed to seriously consider the possibility.
If Alice is gone, I might as well try to get a nap that lasts longer than a few moments, Bella had thought. Maybe then I won't fall asleep mid sentence.
She fell asleep within moments, and she might have even succeeded in her goal, except...
She was… moving?!
Bella's eyes snapped open. She'd only been moved in the hospital bed once, when she'd been transferred from a temporary to a relatively permanent room. And from what she knew, there was no reason she needed to be moved again.
The first thing that she'd noticed was that she was being moved. The second thing that she noticed was that she couldn't move.
Her heart sped up at the realization, which led to her finally getting an answer.
"Don't panic now, sweetheart, we've still got a ways to go." Victoria. "And don't you dare try to draw attention to us, or I'll decide I want to incorporate your little mind reader and you pet wolves into my revenge."
If Bella could move, Victoria would notice that the threat gave her pause, but since she was frozen, her pause seemed no different than her not-pauses.
Bella knew that Victoria was a formidable adversary, the same way one innately knows that a mountain lion is dangerous, or that falling from a great height is deadly. She also knew that even though Edward and Jacob would swear up and down that they could take her, there would be some casualties in a fight between them and Victoria.
And besides, Bella would die in a few days anyway. Edward and Jacob had full, long lives to live.
So it wasn't a hard decision at all to stop fighting, to start taking deep breaths to slow her heart rate. It was less a decision than an automatic response.
"There you go," Victoria said. "I'm glad we can agree that there's no need for me to change my plans."
A shiver wanted to run through her, but couldn't, at that statement. Even though Bella wasn't colluding with Victoria, acquiescing to her demands still felt like a betrayal. A lump formed in her throat.
"And they are excellent plans, let me tell you," Victoria continued. "I'm rather proud of them. James was always the… creative one, and I the logical one."
Creative- or sadistically inclined. She really has a way with words.
"Almost there now! Then we can really get on with things."
Bella's heart sped up again at that, and she tried to get it back down again. Distantly, an alarm started going off, not a high beeping or a loud siren, but a low droning noise.
"Looks like someone's noticed our departure. Let's speed things up, shall we?"
And with that, Bella felt the unmistakable feeling of moving at vampire speed, air rushing against her skin. She was thankful she had her eyes closed.
After a moment, they stopped, and Bella could feel herself being lifted and placed… somewhere. She was laying at an angle and she was laying on what felt like leather…
She didn't piece it together until Victoria started the car. Bella was lying in the backseat of a sedan.
Good thing she was short.
"There are clothes in the left seat pocket that you can change into when the paralytic wears off. Your current dose of painkillers doesn't run out for another twelve hours, I checked, and don't worry, we'll be done by then. When the paralytic does wear off, remember what I said about your mate and the wolves. I've been alive for five hundred years, give or take a few decades, and even if you escape and die from cancer, I'm not afraid to drag them into this. I know how to bide my time, and I will end them, in the most painful way possible."
Safe to say that at this point, Bella had given up on deep breathing.
"Would you like me to turn on the radio?" Victoria asked, suddenly cheerful. The brightness of her tone almost struck Bella as... menacing. "It's a very nice radio; it would be a shame if we never used it during this trip. The owners took very good care of this car."
Victoria audibly sniffed the air, and Bella knew it was just for theatrics. "Probably just one owner, actually. Even though there are more scents- about four, actually- one is more dominant than the others. It's been a while since the other three used this car. Maybe a little over a year? I don't blame them, honestly. Cherry red is an interesting color for a car. I love it, personally, but it is a bit… attention grabbing. Almost garish, really. Not what I would have picked for a BMW."
Bella's eyes flew open, a combination of the paralytic beginning to wear off, and pure, unrestrained shock. Victoria didn't…
Bella took in the interior. The quiet engine, the automatic windows, the well-placed air vents. The state of the art navigation system. The passenger seat, leaned so far back it was clearly adjusted for one, and only one, very huge person.
Victoria did. She totally did.
Bella cleared her throat. "You know, if Edward doesn't get to you first, Rosalie is going to murder you for stealing her car."
Her voice sounded strained, strangled, and quiet. But Victoria laughed anyway.
The feeling of betrayal returned, and the lump in her throat reappeared. She swallowed.
"Try to work on moving your fingers and toes. We'll be switching cars within the next one or two hours, and we'll be leaving anything with your scent on it in here, so you'll need to change soon."
Bella didn't want to follow Victoria's advice, mostly because it was Victoria's but also because something about her last statement struck Bella as odd. It was good advice though, so Bella began working on moving her extremities.
She figured out the odd thing eventually, though. "Why do you keep saying 'we'? I'm not with you in any capacity, and you keep doing things like helping me or telling me what's going to happen, but you're also being purposefully vague about how long it will take to switch cars and, well, you paralyzed and kidnaped me. Why? What's the point of being nice if you're just going to kill me?"
Her head was on the right side of the backseat, so she saw Victoria purse her lips. "You figured out the timing thing, did you? I can see why your mate liked you. You're perceptive, unlike the other humans."
Bella didn't say anything.
"Fine. I'll tell you why. It's because my revenge is against your mate, not at you. You were… caught at the wrong place at the wrong time, like so many of our kind were. You're not responsible for James' death. But your mate made the conscious decision to kill mine. If I wanted revenge on you, I'd be going after Edward, not the other way around."
"My original plan did involve a lot of suffering on your part, I'll admit. I planned to offer you a tasting menu of all the lovely things banned by the Geneva Conventions. And then show that to your annoying mind reader. James would've loved that plan."
A tingling sensation appeared in Bella's hands and feet, but she couldn't tell if it was fear, disgust, the paralytic wearing off, or all three.
"But your hospitalization and your mate's reappearance made me stop and think. At first I though that fate was doing my work for me, that I could give you a few scares and have your mate's own guilt take care of the rest. James would have at least found it acceptable. But it was so… dissatisfying, to see his suffering but know that it would eventually be over, after you died. See, I don't just want Edward to suffer, I want him to suffer the way I do. That's when I realized that I'm not angry at what he did to James, I'm angry at what he did to me."
"That's not self centered at all," Bella muttered without realizing.
"We are all selfish creatures, though, aren't we? And my kind even more so than yours. But it's not as self centered as you think. If your Edward and my James had existed in a vacuum, your mate's decision would have been justified. But people don't just exist in a vacuum! James' death didn't just affect him and you and Edward, it affected me. That's why you can't just kill people!"
"And that isn't ironic at all. And you said it yourself, Edward's decision was justified!"
Victoria laughed, and Bella actually shivered this time. "You really don't get it, do you? Humans aren't people, to us. They're like pets, even for your beloved Cullens. Occasionally, they become more than that, but only if they mean something to one of us, and will eventually become one of us. When a cat eats a canary, you don't shoot the cat. The cat means something to someone, and it was following its nature. And if you save the canary, you most certainly don't shoot the cat, because then the cat did nothing wrong."
"You're wrong. The Cullens think more of humans than that."
"Oh, really? Maybe they do think more of you, but what about your classmates? Your neighbors? The person who works at a grocery store, or the biker they drive past on the highway?"
Bella swallowed. "They're vegetarians. That has to count for something."
"Dear, some humans are vegetarians. That doesn't mean they think a chicken is a person."
Bella stayed silent. The tingling was in her entire arms and legs now.
"And now that we're finished with the ethics debate, I can continue monologuing. I admit, I never cared for the hunt like James did, but this part is quite fun."
"I told you, I've been alive for around five centuries, and with James for three, and for those three hundred years, nothing, nothing, ever made me feel unsafe. Nothing ever made me paranoid or lost or alone. Until your Edward. And I want- no, I need- him to understand what he did to me. He needs to feel the consequences! He doesn't get to just hurt people and ride off into the sunset with you!"
"What I realized was that your death would never make him feel unsafe. It would never make him anxious or go to extreme measures to ensure he or someone he cared about wasn't in danger. It is your life that does that to him. You, being alive, in your fragile, human body, make him paranoid."
"'What a concept!' I thought. 'My mate made me invincible, and his makes him vulnerable. How perplexing.' Then I realized that it was because I had absolute, unshakable faith in James. I knew he was as capable as I. But Edward doesn't have the same faith in you. He knows that you are human, and by default, in danger. Constantly. So then I set about figuring out how to prolong this weakness, his fear, for as long as possible."
A startled, "No," escaped Bella's lips. She pulled herself up with the seats. "You can't change me. You can't." Her volume increased, turning her last words into a shout.
"Don't tell me what I can and can't do. And remember, just because I decided this was the most fitting punishment, doesn't mean I can't change my mind and decide that Edward's death is just as acceptable. Do something useful and get out of that hospital gown."
The sun hadn't even risen above the trees yet. Bella didn't see any other cars on the road. Finding these conditions acceptable, Bella set about attempting to pull on other clothes without rising high enough that Victoria could see in the rearview mirror.
Bella was just beginning to see how convoluted Victoria's logic was. How entangled her web of justifications were. Also, how effective her plan was.
Victoria had virtually given Bella two options. Bella's death from natural causes in a few days and Edward's death at some point in the future, probably as soon as possible. Or Bella's changing, and continued existence, and Edward's torture.
The only loophole Bella could find was that Victoria assumed that Edward would never have complete faith in her. And Victoria was so, so certain of it, that her certainty almost convinced Bella.
If she could do the opposite, make Edward feel invincible, not vulnerable, Victoria's plan would fail. And Edward would live.
But Bella would still be a vampire.
When she was seventeen, with Edward, that was all Bella had ever wanted. To stay seventeen forever, to be frozen in time with her beloved. Now, Bella was older, and even if she was only less than a year older, she was wiser. She'd spent months dreading her eighteenth birthday, and she'd spent months desperately crawling to her nineteenth, to be told again and again she would never reach it. She didn't want to be young forever anymore. She just wanted to turn nineteen, and then turn twenty, and then twenty one. She wanted to go to college and get a job and live in shitty dorms and then shittier apartments. She wanted to have birthdays and Christmases and Easters with her family. She just wanted to be alive, to grow older and appreciate every second of every day of every year. She wanted to figure out if she wanted kids, and watch her friends' kids grow into adults around them all. She wanted to live past eighteen, not be stuck at it.
Could she let go of that, for Edward? Could she even let go of that for herself? Would she be able to wake up in the mornings not haunted by the things she would miss? The advantage of dying was that she wouldn't be faced with all the things she never got to do; as a vampire, she would see them every day. Could she do it?
I was really tempted to name this chapter "An Unexpected Ethics Debate," but I'm doing mostly serious chapter titles for this story, so the solemn aesthetic won out. This chapter is the reason that a seven-chapter story with an epilogue became a nine-chapter story with an epilogue, and those two extra chapters are pretty long chapters. This chapter was the first time I gave Victoria any real dialogue, and I'm pretty sure she says more words here than in the entire Twilight franchise. I was just reading her wiki entry so I could keep her in-character and she's such an interesting character concept! So when I started writing her dialogue all of her complexities began to flesh themselves out, and I already had to make her more complex in order for the plot of this story to make sense. But now I understand Bella/Victoria fics, because once you start writing Victoria, you get Victoria. There may or may not be an idea for a Bella/Victoria spinoff of this fic in my head now. And if y'all want to see that I'd totally start writing it. Anyways, what did you think of Complex!Victoria? Do you think I made her plan realistic enough?
TL;DR: Victoria and her complexities are the reason this story has two extra chapters.