When your day is long
And the night, the night is yours alone
When you're sure you've had enough
Of this life, well hangon
Don'tlet yourself go
'Cause everybody cries
And everybody hurts sometimes
Sometimes everything is wrong
Now it's time to sing along
When your day is night alone (Hold on, hold on)
If you feel like letting go (Hold on)
If you think you've had too much
Of this life, well hang on
Everybody hurts
Take comfort in your friends
Everybody hurts
Don't throw your hand, oh no
Don't throw your hand
If you feel like you're alone
No, no, no, you are not alone
If you're on your own in this life
The days and nights are long
When you think you've had too much of this life to hang on
Well, everybody hurts sometimes
Everybody cries
Everybody hurts sometimes
And everybody hurts sometimes
So hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on
Everybody hurts
Everybody Hurts (C) The Rem & Night Garden Music
Dinner was a happy affair. I look over at Christian, he looks awful, he's not shaved, and his hair is messy. A little just fucked look, I giggle in my head. He is just not looking his normal polished self. I want to talk to him but I need him to approach me after all I left the ball in his court.
I make my excuses after dinner, I feel tired but Grace explains that with any head injury and traumatic incident that it's not uncommon to get tired quickly and I make my way upstairs to bed.
I sink down in between the luxurious sheets and a restful sleep takes over me. I sleep for hours, peacefully for the first time since leaving the hospital. I know you stay in hospital for a good reason but sleeping can be difficult with machines beeping and staff coming in to check on you. You can't beat your own bed!
I turn over and I am aware of somebody else in the room, I begin to panic and scream out for help. In a moment the bedroom door flies open, the light is switched on and Christian rushes into the room like my knight in shining armor, closely followed by Grace and Carrick.
"Ana, what happened? Who did you see?" asks Carrick. I am wide eyed and scared and all I can do is shake my head. I didn't see who it was, just an outline.
Grace is by my side, gently stroking the top of my hand and making soothing noises. Christian however was pacing the floor on his phone.
"Taylor, what the fuck is going on? Someone was in Ana's room! Yes, sitting on her fucking bed!" he is shouting down the phone and it's not helping me.
"Get Sawyer to come up to the house and find out how the fuck some fucker got in!" Grace glares at Christian.
"Language Christian, please" she pleads.
"Sorry Mother" he looks sheepish and leaves the room.
I feel a little calmer; Carrick has made some tea for everyone. I see Sawyer rushing up the stairs and Christian confronts him.
"Sir, it seems someone used a ladder to climb up and through the window but no trace remains of the intruder but it appears they left over the east gate" he almost shrinks back awaiting the backlash.
"Fine, I want more patrols, I want men around the house, inside and out and I want them here NOW! He shouts and we all jump. He storms back into my room, checks the window locks and begins pacing again.
"Please stop" I ask nicely and give him a weak smile.
"Do you want someone to stay with you" he suddenly looks embarrassed "Mia perhaps?"
"No thank you Christian, I will be fine" I say as reassuringly as I can.
"I will have Sawyer sit outside the door and be assured others are patrolling the grounds" he tries to make me feel secure.
"Thank you, I shall try and sleep again" with that everyone leaves the room and I return to a not so peaceful sleep for the rest of the night.
I wake, stretch, forgetting I am still sore, wince and get out of bed and attempt a shower again. After the drama of the night I struggle to stifle yawns throughout breakfast.
I ask Grace where Christian is; she says he left earlier to meet with the security, to debrief those here last night and to investigate what happened.
I feel very restless throughout the day, partially because Christian has not said much to me and I guess last night is playing on my mind. I think about suggesting to Grace that I return home as I am feeling much better and stronger since leaving hospital. However Grace must be a mind reader and tells me "I can't force you to stay but he will come Ana, please wait for him"
Mia and I take a stroll around the grounds with security following closely behind. I ask her how she can bear the intrusion all of the time. She explains she has gotten used to it over the years; really ever since Christian became a power player in business, security has been gradually getting tighter.
I would like to walk around alone but quickly establish that will never happen so I go back to the house and start investigating the vast library. I see so many names of authors I am fond of, such as Sasha Cameron, Bronzy, Ordlas, NuwRiter, Brilee, Marpuri, Smile Rose, Greysfan and many other fantastic writers, I pick a title, tuck myself up on the chaise lounge and begin devouring page by page. I am so engrossed that I don't see Christian enter the room.
"Ana, please may I speak with you privately" he gingerly asks.
"Of course Christian" he looks relieved; he has obviously made an effort to tidy himself up. I indicate for him to sit next to me.
"I don't know where to start" he begins running his hand through his hair "You bewitched me from the very first time I saw you at SIP. The restaurant thing wasn't planned and you were willing and it just happened. I wasn't proud of myself and then again in the office, you looked so fuckable in that dress and I didn't and couldn't keep my hands off of you, you responded to me again and wrongly I just carried on. It wasn't until our discussion and your ultimatum that I sat down and thought about what you had said and although you were willing I can understand why you said those things" he stops to take a breath.
"When I got the phone call from the highway patrol, I almost went out of my mind and when I saw you lying there in the hospital, unconscious and covered in blood, I wanted to punch something. I want you but you almost want the impossible, I am not sure if I can do what you ask Ana" my heart skips a beat and the blood rushes in my ears, I feel a bit light headed and the darkness reigns in again.
"Ana, can you hear me? Squeeze my fingers if you can" I hear Grace and squeeze her fingers and that muttering in the background starts again. I slowly come around and see a host of concerned faces, Christians being the most pale. I sit up and Grace hands me some water and I take a sip.
"Ana, dear you gave us quite a fright! How are you feeling now?" Grace enquires.
"I feel a little groggy and headachy" I reply truthfully.
"I am going to take you back to the hospital for a precautionary CT scan" she starts to get up.
"Oh I will be fine, it's not necessary Grace, I have…" before I am 'helped' up by Christian, while he is telling me that if his mother thinks it should be done then it will be done. How can I argue?
We leave sandwiched between two security cars, Grace is in the back with me and Christian is up front with Taylor. I assumed Grace had called the hospital first as I was taken straight through to the imaging suite and prepared. The whole process takes a little under 10 minutes and when I am finished the radiographer takes me to a chair where I wait for Grace.
She comes around the corner with a smile on her face "Don't look so worried Ana, everything is fine" I breathe a sigh of relief. Thank goodness I say to Grace and she gives me a hug and says "Let's go home" I don't argue with her.
We get home and I go to my room for a sleep. I can't believe I feel this exhausted, I've not done anything after all but I am too tired to protest and I drift off to sleep.
Grace comes in to wake me for dinner, I sit up and she sits down on the bed next to me "Did Christian talk to you Ana?" she tentatively asks.
"Yes, he told me that he wanted me but I was asking the impossible and then I started to feel woozy" I blurt out. I see Grace sigh and she was muttering silly boy as she got up.
"I can't make any promises but I will try and have a talk with him to see what is going on in that mind of his! Come down when you are ready dear, no rush" and she leaves.
I freshen up in the bathroom and walk out of the bedroom door when I am practically run over by the tornado called Mia. "Oh sorry Ana but I was wondering if you wanted to come shopping with mum and me tomorrow, I have cleared it with security and Christian. We will have such fun and I must show you this new jeweler store and a new diner has opened up so we can have lunch there" I just about caught everything she was saying. I don't think I have ever known someone who in excitement can talk so fast and I giggle.
"That does sound like fun Mia, what time are you planning to leave" I ask brightly.
"Oh about eleven o'clock but whenever we are all good to go really" she beams. You can't help getting caught up in her enthusiasm and I am actually looking forward to some retail therapy.
I am having such a great day with Mia and Grace, a little window shopping first then lunch at Donnie's Diner. I absolutely love pancakes but these are absolutely delicious and I am totally stuffed by the time we leave. We shop in Snap! Custom clothing, Washington State Connections and even Nordstrom which I don't think either Grace or Mia has ever been in before and we find ourselves in fits of giggles on and off all day. I even forget that we have security following us everywhere. We arrive back at Grey Manor and go into the house with our various purchases, still laughing at the man who overheard Mia exclaiming she couldn't believe she had never been in Nordstrom before and she was going to tell all her friends about how wonderful it was.
The housekeeper is already waiting with three glasses of fresh lemonade for us and it is very much needed. She tells Grace that dinner will be ready at 6pm so that leaves plenty of time for freshening up. I go up to my room; I still have a grin on my face thinking about Mia, I open the door and find Christian sitting on the end of my bed.
"Oh Christian, I wasn't expecting you to be in here" I say surprised. "Is everything ok?"
"Security has never been tighter after the other night and I am still looking into who has an interest in hurting you but no solid leads so far" he tells me.
"It's very kind of you to be helping me like this" I am unsure what else to say.
"Ana, I have done very little else but think about what we have discussed and although my heart sinks to say this but I don't think I can make this work. It would be very complicated and risky to continue and difficult to alter what I have in place with Samantha. I hope you will understand one day why it has to be this way" I am crushed at his words; I can feel the tears burning at the back of my eyes. He leans over and kisses me softly on the lips, I melt and the tears start to fall.
"I hope you will honor the NDA you signed when we first met and ask that you discuss what happened between us with no one" he almost pleads.
"But I haven't signed an NDA Christian, you never gave one to me" I manage to get out between sobs "I have shared a little information with my best friend Kate who you met at the hospital I gather but I know she will not reveal anything to anybody"
"Kate, as in Katherine Kavanagh, from Kavanagh Media?" I nod with a sense of foreboding.
"Holy fuck Ana! Your best friend is a reporter?! I thought I recognized her but couldn't place her" I nod again. "And you have told her about us?"
"Yes" I reply nervously "but not everything" I hastily add.
"Fuck, this is a disaster" he shouts running his hands through his hair.
"Sorry" I say "I didn't realize I couldn't say anything to her at all"
"Fuck!" he is shouting now "why the fuck didn't you sign the NDA? Like I asked you too and then you would have known"
"I never got a copy to read and sign and then I forgot about it" I raise my voice slightly.
"Damn Vicky, I asked her to give you the copy and file away when finished, Fuck!" I begin to bristle.
"Well for your information Christian, I have no intention of revealing your secrets and neither will Kate!" I shout "what kind of a person do you think I am?" He offers no reply "Please leave Christian"
He walks out and slams the door behind him, I dissolve into tears.
A/N: Loads more to come. I currently have a buffer of 4 chapters so I will see if I can post a bonus before next Tuesday. Keep the reviews and feedback coming. I love hearing from you :)