ill feel some guilt for leaving my babies but I tell them they have me for the whole day tomorrow, we are going to meet up with Auntie Kate and Cousin Ashleigh and have lots of fun together. I still tear up when I leave and promise to call at lunch time like yesterday.
The morning flies by, I need to discuss a couple of files with Christian so I place a call to his office. I am guessing Christian is distracted, busy or both when he picks up his phone….
"Grey"
"Hey honey, sorry to interrupt you but I need to see you fairly promptly if you can squeeze me into your hectic schedule" I ask politely.
"Hey baby" his tone relaxes "Sorry I said no calls but they must have realised it was you. How are you baby?"
"I'm busy but need just about ten minutes of your time today if possible"
"Of course, I would clear my schedule to see you baby" I can tell he is smiling down the phone.
"How about in an hour's time?"
"Deal, love you baby"
"Love you too" and the phone goes down. He has something on his mind I can tell, probably a deal or contract in the offing.
Salad eaten and skype call with my babies done I walk over to Christian's office with the relevant files in my arms. I gently knock on the door and jump when it opens very shortly afterwards.
"Mrs Grey, please come in" my husband stands back to allow me in before shutting the door behind me. He grabs my arm, spins me around, grabs my ponytail and covers my mouth with his. Hmm, the files discarded, I wrap my arms around his neck and deepen the kiss. Christian relaxes, releasing a throaty growl, his hands roam before pulling me closer, I can feel his erection pressing against my thigh, I reach down and caress through the fabric, he emits another growl before breaking our embrace.
"What you do to me Mrs Grey, if I don't stop now you will not return to your office for the rest of the afternoon"
"An interesting proposition but I wouldn't want the boss to find me fraternising with a member of staff on only my second day back now would I?" I giggle.
"You don't want to worry about him, I hear he is always busy in meetings and on the phone" he says tongue in cheek and I laugh again.
His phone buzzes "Yes!" he snaps before listening; he glances at his watch, looks at me before saying "2pm", he replaces the receiver.
"What do you need me to help you with baby?" ok, gone is playful Christian and back to business/no messing around Christian.
"I have a couple of authors that my temp had put a question mark over and I am in two minds also, I want a second opinion and I know you are busy so if you can't I understand or if you have someone else that could help out that would be great….." I have turned to putty, I am rambling and a tear runs down my cheek.
"Whatever is wrong baby?" Christian rushes around his desk and embraces me again.
"Sorry, I feel very indecisive at the moment, I am lacking in confidence I think, it will come when I am back in the swing of things" I dab my cheek with a tissue Christian hands me and I take a deep breath.
"Hey, hey this is not like you, is something bothering you?" he asks with concern.
"I, well I feel guilty about leaving Max and Melissa at times but I know that will ease a little, I need to get used to the workload again I guess but just seeing you helps" I smile through another tear falling.
"You can see me anytime baby, anytime and I have the perfect solution in the short term, how would you like a temporary assistant for a few weeks to help clear the backlog and to bounce ideas off etcetera?"
"But I have a PA" I say confused.
"No this is an editorial assistant, let's get your temp back for a few weeks; you said he seemed pretty much on your wavelength so it may be a solution" Christian looks hopeful.
I smile at the thought of having editorial help, bouncing ideas, discussing up and coming authors, it sounds just perfect although I am surprised by Christian being ok with me working closely with a male colleague…
"Really, you would consider that?" I gasp
"Anything Ana, I hate to see you cry baby, it upsets me immensely and I don't want you to get snowed under and end up like this again" he says quietly.
"This is great, it will help so much" I say excitedly "I will save this for our first meeting then" picking up the files I discarded earlier.
Christian hugs me again and I inhale his aftershave, his body scent and feel calmness being restored. I trip lightly back to toward my office but stop in my tracks when the temp that covered my maternity leave is sitting outside my office in a suit.
"Good afternoon Mrs Grey" he holds his hand out to shake "Where shall we start?"
Once I have stopped gaping at him, find the power of speech again, I shake his hand and invite him into my office.
After spending a couple of hours of poring over the manuscripts I was unsure of with Martin, I emerge feeling a whole lot lighter and confident that we can work well together and make the right decisions.
I am anxious to get home, Taylor is driving me and Christian is going to be late so I fully intend to bathe and put the twins to bed tonight. I glance through new author's manuscript but tediously I feel a headache coming on. I shake my head in annoyance as I put the file in my attaché case and rest my head on the back of the seat.
"Are you ok Mrs Grey?" Taylors voice makes my head bang.
"A headache Taylor that's all, are we far from home?" I ask hoping it's only a matter of minutes.
"No Ma'am just turning into Escala now"
I breathe a sigh of relief, who knew 2 days of work could albeit partially my fault for getting stressed and worried, make you feel so poorly.
Gail takes one look at me and marches me to bed but not before scolding me for not eating and drinking enough during the day. She returns about ten minutes later with water, headache pills and a sandwich.
The water and pills go down quickly, the sandwich a little less so but I manage half before feeling nauseous.
Sleep is a welcome escape until I am aware of someone in the room with me.
I squint "Christian?"
"Hey baby, I didn't mean to wake you but wanted to check you are ok?" he sits beside me on the bed and smooths my brow.
"I'm ok, I think I got a bit worked up today and I didn't eat and drink enough" I cast my eyes down as I realise how this could have been avoided.
"Ana, when are you going to start taking care of yourself, eh?" he chastises me "You need fuel, food for energy to work, to sleep, to look after Max and Melissa, to live!" his voice raises so I know he is really disappointed with me. He turns his back on me which makes me feel even worse.
"I'm sorry" I have nothing else I can say but another tear runs down my face.
"Don't cry Ana, this is entirely your own fault, when will you learn!"
"Please don't" my voice is a whisper.
Christians face softens and he puts his arm around me before kissing my forehead "Why Ana? Baby, I don't understand why and never have"
"I don't do it deliberately, I get wrapped up in things; time slips by and well, by then it's too late" I sob.
"I am going to schedule a lunch break with your PA for every day you work and this is not to be altered for meetings or work of any kind, you will place a weekly order for lunch at any food outlet on a Monday to be delivered or collected. If you want to take lunch out of the office then please take Taylor with you" Christian orders.
"You are treating me like a child!" I snap.
"When you start behaving like an adult, things can be altered!" he answers back "I hate seeing you like this, it scares me baby, our children need you, and I need you"
His words are dripping with disappointment and it makes me feel so bad, worse than when he is just angry but I realise he is right and I am not helping myself stay healthy.
"I'm sorry, I will try harder, I promise"
"Not good enough Ana, trying harder is fine but I need to know you are eating three times a day, I'm not asking for you to eat a mountain every day, just enough to keep you functional, I know what it is like to be hungry…." His face is pained, etched with a mix of frustration and sadness as he walks out of the room.
I drift into an uneasy sleep with Christian's words floating around in my dreams, I don't feel him come to bed or hear him get up in the morning. I tentatively open my eyes, check the clock to see 6.30am and Christian lets out a little cough to alert me, without scaring me to his presence in the room. He is holding a tray with tea, toast and cereal for breakfast. I glance up, almost worried about his reaction to me but am shocked to see a rose between his teeth.
He takes it from between his teeth and offers it to me "I'm sorry baby, I didn't mean to be so harsh last night but you worried me, you are making yourself sick"
"Thank you Christian and I am sorry, I know I have to be better" I admit inhaling the feint aroma from the rose.
"I have an early meeting baby but Gail is under strict instructions to make sure you have eaten all the cereal and a slice of toast" I note the emphasis in all the cereal!
I open my mouth to protest that even a whole bowl of cereal (Christians idea of a whole bowl is full to the brim or slightly over flowing) and toast is a little too much when I see him wink at me with a wry smile on his face.
He leans in for a kiss "enjoy, see you later baby" and he is gone. I tuck into my cereal, getting to about three quarters empty before my stomach starts to protest and I feel bloated and uncomfortable.
I remember we are going to see Kate and Ashleigh so I hop out of bed, into the shower and put on some casual clothes to go to the park and coffee shop.
Gail has the twins almost ready, Taylor and Sawyer are our chaperones for today and we head over to pick up Kate.
It feels like a lifetime since I have seen them and Ashleigh is so big! We put the children together before putting our feet up with a cup of coffee and having a good natter about everything.
We head out for lunch at a child friendly café right next to the park and continue our overdue catch up before taking a stroll around the park. We put the children in the baby swings, Melissa and Ashleigh giggle as they gently swing back and forth however Max makes it clearly known that he is not happy and it takes me a few moments of cooing and reassurance for him to stop crying. Kate and I catch a fit of the giggles at his grumpy face and it takes us a while to calm but my muscles are aching from laughing.
A moment later the hairs on the back of my neck prickle and whilst I can't see anything or anyone I know it is time to leave. I detest having to cut short my activity. Taylor already senses my concern and is hurrying over to escort us to the car, Sawyer is behind observing, he spots a photographer in the bushes to our right, Taylor tenses and his hand automatically goes to his weapon.
We reach the car, getting in unfortunately with three babies and 2 buggies is not a quick process. Sawyer shields us as Taylor straps the children in their seats and we start the journey home.
A/N: Thanks for all your support