Steward Of Paradise At Work

by Tall-Gothic-Guy

I didn't come here to meet shrine maidens or monsters. I didn't come here to erect a cross. No one even told me about magic being a thing here. Actually, I didn't expect myself to be here at all. I was simply chasing a woman who created eye portals. But it beats being a runaway thief. I just wish I knew sooner, that this place will never give me a break, not even God...Bring it on.

8. Serve For Serving's Sake

[My thanks for this.]

"Oh, don't be, Comrade Eman. Consider this as an act of apology. You may have forgiven me for damaging your eye, you haven't done so for the strikes I gave you in my punishment."

Really? Shouldn't my forgiveness apply to all your wrongs in the first place, especially the blows you sent me? Those were before you just exploded my eye. Your logic is flawed, Chun Lee.

Not that I'll tell her. I wanna sample her massaging skills for a bit.

[….Right. You already started anyway. You know how to do this kind of thing, massages and stuff?]

"Yes." She gave my shoulders a friendly pat, "I even knew a few techniques that can be applied to oneself."

[Sweet…..You're only gonna handle the back part?]

"Well," She hummed in thought for a bit, "I might as well include your right arm as well. You seemed to favor your right arm more than your left whenever you throw a punch."

Yeah. I'm not much of a puncher at all. I'm rather ambidextrous with my legs. The legs have the heaviest amount of muscle than the arms after all, figured they'd be reliable in throwing a heavier blow to my strikes.

[When I go in the offense, I always use kicks.] I paused, motioning my arms a little to test out the flexion. My right arm is slightly stiff, yeah she gotta work on this one after my back. [I don't know much about punching but I could block with 'em.]

"Hmm, kicks do have a longer reach than a standard punch and with extra power to boot, but you must at least be versed with the basics."

[Won't an eccentric set of kicking techniques compensate the lack of fists being thrown?] The tumbling in fighting style is kinda a way to confuse my opponents and to give them a hard time to aim a strike. Who'd risk throwing a strike against a tumbleweed if you don't know where the kick is coming from or where it's gonna to hit you?

That kind of fighting style requires a lot of control of momentum and agility to make your tumbles quick and hard to catch up to. Good thing I have experience since I was a little kiddo myself.

"Even so, you must have a wider skill set than the one you currently have." She paused in her massages, "Even if you don't use it, have it as a secret factor in your capabilities and, maybe, surprise your opponent with it once he or she had adapted to your current fighting style."

Ho ho ho, listen to her speak, it's like she was a Sensei in the dojo that teaches me the art of martial arts and self-defense. Her master is seriously going to be proud of her student now taking the role as the instructor with me taking Meiling's place as the noob that needs a good beating before the real thing.

"Understood, Meiling-Sensei." I smiled to her over my shoulder, eliciting a giggle from her, continuing to rub circles on my shoulder and back in a methodical pattern. [Ah~ This is great.]

"Since my student has taken my words to heart, you shall receive a top-notch massage from me."

[Hmm~ Countin' on you.]

Oh yeah~ This feels great. If she's good with her arms to slap somebody in the face, then this sort of utility also makes good use for those slim and powerful limbs of steel as well.

Don't wanna end up moaning in satisfaction and lose manly pride so I'll just whistle to pass the time, without falling asleep.

*Whistle~*

….

Damn, I feel sleepy already.

"Mm, this pie's the best-ze!"

"In the courtesy of the Jergo and the hobgoblins, Ms. Marisa." Sakuya noted, "They learn very quickly when I taught them the preferred dishes of the Mistress the first time they took employment."

"Yeah, they're the best." She began to slice another serving. "They make good punching bags too, they have the best teamwork, 'specially when they try to nail me whenever I borrow a few stuff from here. Oh, and your cooking's good too."

"Thank you." Sakuya bowed, "Is there anything you might prefer for the next time Milady invites you for a feast?"

"Nah, anythin's good." She popped the pie to her mouth, "This place makes a good grub." Please swallow before you talk, Marisa.

"That pie is personally baked by Jergo himself. He rarely cooks these days on his own initiative and I'm a little surprised that he suddenly starts now."

Heh. I guess I should be honored here, based on what Sakuya said, right? A guy who rarely cooks had actually cooked something for me.

"He also told me that it serves as a token of his gratitude to Mr. Eman for his lenience to Meiling." Hehe. "I'm a little surprised that he would give you his dish, considering he seemed to be cross with you earlier."

"Nah, we just kissed and made up so we got no problems now. Thanks, Eman!"

I nodded. "You're welcome, Marisa."

"Um, Comrade?" Meiling froze on her massage, "Did the two of you actually…ki-kissed?"

Ugh. You better not be in a case of muscles-for-brains, Chun Lee. "It's an expression, my friend. I already forgave her, and I cannot finish that pie on my own."

"Hmm. Whatever case that could actually entail." Sakuya took the teapot in her hands, "Would you like some more tea?"

"Yes, please!" Marisa grasped her cup and motioned to the beverage.

*Whistle~*

"How was the ruckus upstairs, Marisa?"

"Upstairs?" Marisa paused to take a sip, "What d'you mean, Patchouli?"

"I mean of your adventurous excursion on the rooftop escaping Eman's fists."

"Oh, that?" She leaned back against her chair, resting the elbow of her arm holding the cup on the armrest, "It was alright, got my hair go haywire though." She gestured to her curly side lock that was supposed to be a braid. I could see the ribbon that bundled it pocketed in her apron.

"I've been wondering," Patchouli looked up from her book and faced the witch, "How did he get up there?"

Hm, hm.

"Hell if I knew. When I looked at the edge, his hand came up and grabbed on to the roof then—boom!—He got up, then he starts running after me, waving a knife around like a jackass."

*Whist—* KKrrrk!

'Jackass'? Are you bloody serious, Marisa? Out of all the things to compare me to, you picked 'Jackass'?

"Are you saying that he scaled the walls?" Patchouli asked in disbelief, "The mansion walls doesn't have footholds, and it's smooth-surfaced. Even if there were, they're too small for large hands. How could he even accomplish that if he couldn't even fly?"

Hehe. You're literally behind the times, Bookworm. The boys in the real world could do a lot more than that.

"Like I said: Hell if I knew. Before I got up there when I looked behind me, I saw him running up that wall."

The librarian was wide-eyed, "….Preposterous. Either he knows magic or did the outside world finally excel in their physical abilities?"

"Again: Hell if I knew. I never even knew what the outside world is anyway."

Hah. I feel sleepy.

….

….

"Is what she said true, Comrade Eman?" Meiling asked behind me, methodically pressing her fingers just at the edge of my shoulder blades before rolling circles.

I rolled my neck before I answered, "Generally putting: acrobatics is my privilege. With enough experience I can scale a smooth-surface as if gravity doesn't bind me."

"Running up a wall?" She rolled her thumbs across my shoulder blades. "You must be a special kind of human."

I turned to face her over my shoulder with a disinterested look, "Define 'Special'. Marisa here is a human and she casts magic. Is she not considered a special kind of human?"

"Aw, ya make me blush-ze."

"I wasn't finished." Meiling smiled good-naturedly, placing both hands on my temple to turn my head facing straightforward then she began massaging my shoulders. "You are familiar with the Hakurei shrine maiden, no?" I nodded. "Right. Comrade Reimu and Kirisame Marisa are indeed powerful humans, yes, and they have more than enough evidence to prove it. But I can't say the same about many outsiders."

Hmm...….

"Is it because a majority of us do not have the same privilege as me or cast magic like Marisa?"

"Well…." Her hands stopped working, "Yes, that may be the reason, but that's not it." She moved to my side and began to make work with my right arm, running her fingers carefully across the bicep to remove the knots before moving to the wrist. "A majority of your kind aren't so….accepting of beings like us."

Now, that caught my attention. "Explain."

"Most humans, whether native to Gensokyo or not, normally fear Youkai. Not many of them are open-minded as you are. You, my friend, are a unique one. The only human present within us is Ms. Sakuya alone. Mistress Remilia is a vampire, Koa is a succubus, even me, I'm a Youkai."

I noticed, you got arms of steel, your eyes could turn into slits, they went feral for a moment earlier, and you had fangs. You're clearly not a human, even if you look like one. I'm starting to see her point, but I'm going to let her finish before I say anything.

"You could already tell who we really are: not human, yet you do not fear us nor loathe us, you do not see us as anything but a…..uh….as another human. I mean no offense, Comrade Eman, but I must ask. Why?"

Oh….

….

So it's still the same, huh?

Even for Gensokyo it's still the same.

Humans still fear what they do not know or understand. Even for the major fuckups of reality Gensokyo has, the humans are still the same. The humans here are more than a century behind the modern people outside, but they are among these supernatural beings for even longer than that, and yet they still fear them? For a hundred years to pass, they should have matured from that amount time. Yet, still? Modern humans are the right people to be scared since they never saw beings like them, ever in their lives.

I'm a powerless human right next to a few supernatural beings, and we're eating cake and drinking tea together. And Meiling still says that? Can't the humans here understand that some Youkai are not mindless monsters?

It must be a blessing that I was too weird, even for millennial standards.

Sigh. Without looking at anybody in particular, I answered, "It's because of the fact that I like strange things." If I had the right to be smug, then I should. People outside wouldn't be so blasé like this if they were put in my place. You nearly get assaulted by a vampire in your sleep, you brush it off as if it never happened. Open-minded people like me are endangered, after all. "By that, I mean that everything that isn't considered ordinary is something that catches my attention."

"Like what? Youkai?"

"Not just the Youkai kind, but everything I have never seen prior to my arrival to Gensokyo." One of the things I knew when I first arrived to Gensokyo was that everything in it is not always about another kind of species. "Magic, an unpolluted land, risk of death everywhere…." There was a lot more for me to list, include the fact that God was an existing entity here, but I can't mention it all. I just can't. I turned to Remilia Scarlet, "Seeing a vampire for the first time was the best spoil I could ever have in this place."

The mention of her species brought Draculina's eyes to me, her lips slowly extending to a teasing smirk. "Are you saying I've caught your eyes, Eman?" Nice try, Milady, but I already went through this dance years ago.

I countered her smirk with my own, "But you are not the most fascinating yet." And her smirk fell, only leading to a glare. Whoops? "There are still a lot of wonders for me to see, and I am eager to find them."

"And how are you going to do exactly that, walk around Gensokyo and hope to see a lowly Youkai, expecting it to not attack you?"

Geez. Don't be so sour just because I ruined your pride, Draculina. "I wouldn't be so reckless at such an aim, Lady Remilia. I still value my life after all and my acrobats barely proves a match against all of you."

That lead to everyone looking at each other with a sense of acknowledgements and puffed chests (Marisa)….urrrrr, Koakuma, don't look at my eyes.

"You proved a match against Meiling's physical prowess." Patchouli pointed out, flipping a page.

"Only because she was blocking me the first time. When she began to fight back, her skills compared to mine had a rather definite marginal difference."

"May I say, comrade, that you were holding back?" Meiling inquired, pulling on my fingers to draw out a snap.

I looked at the gatekeeper critically, "I wasn't. I clearly injured you, that much is evidence that I held nothing back."

"Then let me state it clearly." Jeez, Chun Lee, how much credit are you going to give me? "You weren't being assertive."

I raised an eyebrow; what?

"You'll understand." She gave my hand a few last presses, then she patted it. "There, done. How is it?"

I lifted up my arm, turning my wrist around or twisting my arm to test the effects. No spikes on the elbow or the bicep. She did well. "Thank you." I stood up from the chair, stretching my arms and bending my spine, earning myself a few good crackles. Ahh, that felt wonderful. There are still a few aches here and there in my body but it's barely a bother. "Now, I'm all good. Marisa, are you finished yet?"

"What, we gonna go home?" She asked with a mouthful of pie. My pie. I probably couldn't finish that entire thing myself, I cut too big a slice. Let 'er have it, no loss. I pretty much lost my appetite during all the crap I just did at the roof.

Punching that tile sure shocked me. It just frickin' exploded, I didn't know I had that in me. Thank goodness no one was hurt with the fallen fragments. I'm even more shocked that I didn't get a cut out of that. I hope Sakuya doesn't find out it was me.

"Yes, and we'll need your broom for the faster route home."

Huh, I just called Master's shrine my 'home'. I'm getting used to this.

"You're leaving already?" Patchouli asked, turning to me.

"I have to. Priestess Reimu might be stressed at the moment."

"I bet, she's givin' every Youkai a black eye for nothin'! HAhahaha! That makes it my win, I found ya' first."

Whatever, Marisa. I turned to the librarian, "Right, do you need something, Ms. Patchouli?"

She brought a finger to her chin, then she lightly nodded to herself, as if agreeing about something. "If you could, please come back tomorrow. There is something odd about your blood and I need to examine it. If not tomorrow, then the day after that."

Wait, what? "What of my blood?"

"Sorry to say this but your blood has peculiarities, which I need to identify. Urgently."

Okay, now I'm concerned. My blood is 'peculiar'? That doesn't sit right with me. Not at all. Am I having cancer? "We'll see to it, Madam Patchouli, when I come back." I turned to the other magician, "Hurry."

"Okay, just a sec." Marisa wolfed down every piece of the pie with a large picking with her sliver fork before she downed the tea with a loud slurp, swallowing every content inside that mouth with a rather loud gulp. "Okay let's go."

Wow. That was entertaining to watch. And damn does she have an appetite. Even if I was starving I doubt I'd finish that whole pie, and how did all of that get stuffed inside that mouth? Geez.

"Eman, come on." Oh, Marisa already has the engine running. Got so stuck in my thoughts that I didn't even notice her go by me. Don't wanna be left behind, don't we?

"Eman~" A singsong voice called behind me. "Remember our agreement."

Ooh, right, the compensation. [Sorry, forgot about that.] I'm no longer under the balcony now, gotta be on her level, in the shadows where the sun won't hurt her. [This won't vamperize me, right?] I asked as I stood in front of her.

"Don't worry, my boy. I won't force such a change without your consent." Remilia's voice was very soothing, almost motherly in nature that I'm not even tensing at all, "I'm a light eater so you are assured from suffering anemia. And about that, if I want my victims to become a vampire they must be empty of their blood, and I will offer the curse with my blood."

Huh, [That's reassuring.] I knelt down to one knee before her, removed the bandana out of my neck and wrapped it around my left hand. Afterwards, I turned my head to the left, pulled down my collar with my finger and exposed my neck for her. [Here, dig in. All I want in return is that you don't spill.]

Instead of going in like I expected, she crossed her arms, one hand rubbing her chin in thought as she regarded me in a new light, "Never in my undead life did I ever see a human offer his blood like that to me."

"Aren't ya scared or something, Eman?" Marisa asked behind me.

I shook my head, "Not at all. I was a blood donor for two straight years back in the Outside World." Huh, I called it the 'Outside World' too, I'm really getting used to this place.

"A vampire's kiss doesn't compare to such a thing, my boy." Remilia pointed out in the same motherly tone. Damn it, it's so nice to hear.

I rolled my eyes flippantly, [Same difference, really. Not the first time I handed out blood anyway.] I stroked a finger down my neck before I tugged my collar again, [Go ahead.]

She then gave me a smile. It wasn't a devious sneer or a mysterious smirk like she usually does, it was a full genuine smile. I'm a little bit choosy between 'cute' or 'charming' if I want to describe it. "Among all of the mundane humans who met the Scarlet Devil and walked away unscathed, you are the first to not show fear at the first sight of me, the first to give me a look of awe despite knowing who I truly am, and the first to offer his blood willingly."

Huh, I guess that's a helluva privilege I'll be taking from a vampire, [It's an honor to be the first one, Lady Scarlet.]

She finally stepped forward and laid both hands on my shoulders gently, nearing her lips to my neck. At reflex, I stiffened up as I felt her cold breath on my skin. I was reminded that another vampire did the same thing last night, done without regard of being consensual. "Relax, Eman." Remilia's gentle whisper, however, calmed me down instantly. "Leave everything to me."

There was no room for anxiety anymore the sooner she said that. It was like she casted a calming spell on me, I was fully relaxed, surrendering myself to her, and not at all concerned.

Her lips brushed my neck, a slight tickle made me jerk my body a little. She giggled at that, giving my skin a rather small chaste kiss. I closed my eyes, biting my lower lip to keep myself composed. Her lips didn't leave my neck yet, giving it a light nip and a suckle on the skin, not sinking her teeth in yet. My heartbeat was starting to pace up, my breathing included, and I was starting to think that Remilia's only fooling around. Is she trying to enjoy herself with me or is she purposely doing this to increase the blood flow on my veins?

I wasn't sure which, and it's even impossible to think of the answer logically. I just couldn't get my mind off of Remilia's cold lips, the fact that my eyes are closed just made my sense of touch hyper-sensitive. She was starting to give even more small kisses, from the spot she started on upwards close to my ear.

I am a Christian, and it's my job to resist the love of the flesh, but I don't think I could hold up to that thought for too long. This feels far too wrong, but so good to even resist.

"Duuude…."

"Milady…"

"Remi, what are you…."

In a state where there are people watching this sort of thing happening, I should be ashamed, but I can't seem to feel that way at all. Remilia was too enchanting in this ordeal. Her scent, since when does a vampire smell like cherry? This thing was too great that I can't think of it as something shameful in public.

Gk!

She licked me. Starting from below my ear towards the starting point of her kiss, she lapped the tip of her tongue poking out slightly in-between her lips on my skin all the way there. There was no doubt that my face was starting to become red, and the fact that I got myself pale skin just last Sunday makes all my feelings too obvious.

"Haaaa…"

She bit me.

It was a swift stab of two thick needles into my neck, and it hurt regardless of what I expected. I was used to needle stabs, being a blood donor for so long granted me the privilege to not even feel it, but I did not see Remilia's bite coming. I was too distracted by her kisses.

Due to how sudden it was, my eyes shot open and I stiffened for half a second before I willed my body to relax. My hands shot forward to grab her sides, almost reflexively pushing her back. I wouldn't have done it but Remilia didn't share the same thoughts as her large wings suddenly enclosed me in a rather tight hug. I could feel the leather on my forearms, I could feel just how tight I was held close to her with them.

My breathing began to pace as I felt her sucking all of my universally-transferable blood down her throat. As she kneaded my shoulders, as if doing so would pump out more of my blood, her tongue rolled all around her mouth, lapping everything that spilled out of the two stabs she put on me. There was no way for me to slip myself out of this embrace, her wings were almost like the thick arms of a muscle builder, tight in the hold and unbreakable.

I'm feeling lightheaded, my vision was starting to blur. Shit…not this again. I went through enough of this feeling that I could mentally manage myself, but I think Remilia was taking too much. My focus was still waning, despite my efforts. I thought she said that she was a light eater, in what amount does she mean when she said that?

[Hhrrrr…] Without even realizing it, my throat let out a growl.

"Aaaah…" After what seemed to be 10 minutes, which was actually a single minute of blood sucking, Remilia Scarlet finally released her fangs from me.

Giving the stinging bite wounds a long lick with her cold tongue, she unraveled herself from me and released me from her winged embrace. Looking at me with a blank look, her blood-red eyes turning yellow and glowing like molten fires. An aftereffect of drinking my blood, perhaps? "You have paid your debt, Eman. You may leave." Her motherly voice was gone now, in its place was a dull tone, almost monotonous and emotionless.

I bowed my head as a form of thanks and grunted as I rose to my feet, wiping the still-bleeding bite wound with my wrapped up hand. Slightly heaving in every breath, I took rather lumbering steps towards Marisa. Her face was slightly red, an awkward smile on her lips. "Quite the kink, eh?"

I didn't reply, my mind was too boggled by the lack of oxygen. It's a wonder that I didn't lose my balance yet.

As I posted myself on the broom in front of her, legs hanging either side, both my hands gripping the shaft as tightly as I could—I fell forward suddenly, my grip on the broom with my left hand slipped. "Damn it." The flight home could get dangerous with me like this, I could fall off before I could grab on.

"Here." A firm hand held on to my shoulder, "I'll hold ya."

I nodded gratefully as I replied in a hissy whisper, "Thanks." I turned to face the people of the Scarlet Devil Mansion. Remilia Scarlet stood still on the tiled porch, her eyes still glowed yellow and the shade made them stick out like a torchlight. The rest were still seated (except a standing Sakuya), but all were facing this way. Seems they want to see me off like this.

I called out in a loud voice, "Thank you for all the hospitality you've given me, Scarlet Devil Mansion." I wish I had a hat to tip for this or maybe my above average sense of balance returned to me so I could stand on this broom effortlessly like Marisa and bow. Too bad that ain't gonna happen with me as lightheaded as fuck. "You were all a lifesaver for a hapless outsider like me. I am grateful."

"You're welcome to my home anytime, Eman. You make interesting company." Remilia added, her ominous smile finally coming back. For once, she looked a little attractive despite the face (it looked more of a sneer but eh).

"Anytime, Mr. Eman." Sakuya returned, bowing politely as of custom.

"See you soon, comrade." Meiling waved. I'll be seeing you real soon too, my new friend. Just be prepared for more punches, yeah?

Alrighty, take us home, Marisa. "Go." If my usual energy had not been taken via vampire kiss, I would've yelled 'To the Skies!'.

"Right. See ya later, guys. Expect me to borrow some books t'morrow, Patchy." We began to pick up the pace and we curved to the air, heading straight for home.

~~~~~ « ҉ » ~~~~~

As the two humans finally departed to the skies, their forms slowly becoming dots in the limited perspective of a human vision facing the rather cloudy sky, Remilia Scarlet closed her eyes, hiding the burning glow of her eyes from her subjects as she turned around and went for the door, relying solely on memory, increased hearing, and a slight use of muscle memory to guide her way.

"Ojou-sama?" Sakuya's voice conveyed concern, finding oddity in her actions perhaps.

"I'll be heading back to my quarters, Sakuya." She simply stated, still not opening her eyes as she reached forward and gripped the doorknob that belonged to the backdoor. "And I wish not to be disturbed until tomorrow."

It was silent at first, then the predictable reply came, "Yes, Mistress."

"Remi, what's gotten into—"

"Not now, Patchy." Remilia interrupted, not eager to reveal everything besides the fact that her mood is anything but placid. "Until tomorrow."

As she closed the door behind her, she flapped her wings once and she was already flying towards her master bedroom in a speed faster than the blink of a human eye, leaving a powerful gust of wind in her flight, sending the fewest curtains to sway and more than a few vases to fall off their places before landing into the hands of an attentive goblin, saving the valued possession from total destruction.

"Eman Letitia….." The Scarlet Devil's voice was nothing more than a growl. As she finally revealed her glowing orbs of a burning furnace to the world, her expression became hateful and baleful, bearing all of the hatred she once held in her first century as a vampire, the kind of hatred reserved only for the group of people that Eman Letitia was part of, the same people who ruined her life, the same people that gave her the very name every frightened villager and hunter that knew her by before she claimed their lives, "….This isn't personal against you but the next time you enter my home, you will leave this place as a corpse."

~~~~~ « ҉ » ~~~~~

Damn it, I nearly fell again. "He-hey! Dude! Hold on just a li'l bit-ze!"

"Then move this damn thing even faster, Marisa!" You're moving way too slow for my entertainment, witch. You gotta be faster than this kind of speed! I wanna yell my fucking voice out!

"If I do, you'll totally fall off! I told ya already, I can't catch you if you fell!"

"Then I will simply hold on and not fall off the broom, doesn't that qualify as reassurance!?"

"After getting the vamps to drink ya like a glass of OJ? No way! Yer clearly lightheaded, Eman!"

Agh, you know what? Fuck it. Alley-oop!

"WHA! EMAN! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?"

Look at me, I'm a sloth!

[AW FUCK YEAH, THIS IS SO MUCH BETTER!] YES! LET THE DANGEROUS POSITION AND THE THRILL OF DANGER MAKE MY HEART BEAT LIKE FUCKING CRAZY! FILL MY FUCKING HEAD WITH OXYGENATED BLOOD AGAIN! [WHOOOOOOOO! HAHAHAHAHAHA!]

"You fucking…!" She grabbed the fabric of my pants beside my waist and—holy shit, she actually pulled me straight back to a horseback position. This Marisa is a tiny-ass woman, so short that she could've passed off as my sister, and she managed to pull me—me, a fucking muscle-heavy, suicidal maniac straight upright with one fricking arm! Wow!

After rescuing me, she swerved the broom to a fine curve turn, our forms literally horizontal to control our balance before we stopped to a hover. I turned to her, "Why did we stop?" What gives, Marisa?

*CHOP!*

….fucking….!

[Ow.] Even if I sound not so hurt to you, that TOTALLY GAVE ME A HEADACHE, YOU DIMWIT!

"Are you an idiot, dude!? You could'a fallen off, you dickwad! You don't even know how to fly yet! Were you even taking me seriously here!? Were you even taking what just happened seriously!?" Dude, she looked totally peeved off here, and this time it wasn't just a show of anger wrought by a hurt pride, this was an anger wrought by concern, concern for my well-being, "You got sucked by Rems, you got lightheaded, I got to slow down so that you don't fall off from overspeedin', and you just tip yourself over!? And for what, huh!?"

*BONK!*

OW, MY HEAD! AGAIN! REALLY!? ARE YOU TRYING TO HAMMER MY HEAD IN!?

"What the fuck is wrong with you, eh!?" Again. "Aren't ya thinkin' 'bout yourself for even a fucking second, Eman!?" Again. "Did you even thought for a second that you could've died there!?" And again. "You can't fly, you stupid shit! Unless you fuckin' know how, you!" On my face. "Fucking!" Again. "Don't!" Again. "Do!" And again. "That!" Yet again. "Again!"

Fucking!

I caught her fist before she could punctuate that 'again' with another punch to my face, and I looked at her red face grimly. Her face was red from the anger, she even looked like she was holding back tears. Why would she though? We've barely gotten together a lot, and we just started being buddies yesterday, why?

"Calm down, Marisa." I admit, what she said and all the blows she gave me, it hit me hard. Her display of concern, backed up by anger, was extremely piercing, straight at my heart. The fucking guilt and shame, holy fucking shit it's unbearable. Nobody shows concern like that to me. Nobody in my life. I never seen somebody get so angry with me because of doing something stupid that it causes worry. To think that I caused unnecessary worry for my friend didn't sit right with me, not at all, "It was not as if I was aiming for an easy death. It was a means to increase my heart rate, some way to recover my drained supply of blood."

She gave me an almighty look of exasperation, pulling her fist out of my hold violently, "Recover?! Are you shitting me, man!? That was too dangerous for you! I could barely do anything to catch ya, didn't I already tell ya that!?"

I rubbed the spot she hammered on, "I was in no worry. How could I even fall if that was not even the first time I've done it?"

"What if you actually fell, you moron!?" Damn, she's really giving me a lot of names, "What if all that experience of yours didn't save ya this time!? What if ya slipped!?"

"I did not slip, Marisa. My experience has not failed me, not even once." I swear by my life that this is true, this is not being stubborn, this is fact statement! "I knew what I was doing before I even executed it."

"But—!"

I grabbed her shoulder in a slap, "But nothing, Marisa." She only gave me a glare, I mirrored her look but only for two seconds before I looked away, my voice going soft and submissive, "….thank you for worrying though…you were the first person to worry, the first to worry that I might get hurt…besides my little sister." Besides Emmanuella, even though she barely leaves the house and barely experienced what it's like to be in a dangerous position.

She gave me a surprised look, her forehead creasing in disbelief, "Wha-what are you saying?"

"No one worries about me, Marisa." I snapped that in the stoniest voice I could use to show just how true it was, and how much I actually resented the fact, "I do certain things people call 'crazy', 'insane'…'suicidal', they say such things but they aren't concerned, not at all. People expect me to succeed instead of worrying about my well-being. They think that a person like me could actually do it. They expect me to actually do it, expect me to win the wager, to meet their expectations. Since the day I noticed it, I've grown to stop caring about danger and trained myself for any mishaps. That way, I won't be able to fail anything." I turned to her, staring straight to her blue eyes, "You are, legitimately, the first to care, Marisa." I tightened my hold on her shoulder, not to hurt but to express my emotions through the touch, "I would be angry at any person who would verbally display concern for me. I've committed this stunt a thousand times, am I honestly going to fail if I go past the thousandth mark? But to see you looking so….worried and…angry and concerned…" I looked away, "That makes me happy, Marisa. Happier than I ever felt in these part two years frowning the entire half of it….thank you."

I released her shoulder, turning my body back to face forward and gripped the shaft tightly. The lightheadedness was gone, I'm no longer woozy or anything now. I could bear top speeds now without any risk of falling off, but I'm going abide Marisa's advice, just for her sakes.

I don't wanna worry her.

"I will not do it again, I promise. You can take a slow speed for us if you like."

When I expected her to move this broom forward after a dozen or so seconds, she didn't. Instead, I felt a small hand grip my shoulder, squeezing and trying to crush it. It wasn't painful, I felt warmth coming from it rather, "I don't want you dead….because I've yet to see you in a real danmaku fight-ze." I can't see her face since I wasn't facing her, but her low voice was telling something, "I don't give a shit if something happens to ya! I don't give a fuck if ya hurt yerself doing those stunts! But I swear to the fucking gods, Eman, that if you die before I could see ya play danmaku….I'll fucking hunt yer ghosty ass in the Netherworld and beat the motherloving shit outta ya-da ze!"

I know people like you, Marisa. Your one of those people who'd disguise honest words with something else that's not even a lie but not the exact words truly felt inside. I'm one of 'em too. The fact that that's the case implies a lot of things, Marisa, and I really, really, really, really appreciate that.

This is one of the reasons why I should be making friends now that I'm in Gensokyo. I get to tell my honest thoughts to someone finally after bottling them up for so long. I'd get to experience how it feels to have a friend again. If I wanted to celebrate, I'll have somebody to drag into. If I got something crazy, fun, or boring to talk about for the hell of it, there's always somebody opting to listen. If I cry, I'll get a shoulder to lean on instead of my knees. And this is where it's fun: if I wanted somebody to beat up just for the fun of it, I got Marisa to back me up on that. I get the feeling that she wouldn't say no.

I grasped her hand gripping my shoulder tenderly, squeezing it with all of my appreciation, "Your sentiment is appreciated." I then let go, back to holding on. Not for safety's sake but just for her reassurance. "Let's go, Marisa. I have stories to tell, and I want our little Priestess to hear it alongside you."

"Sweet!" OY! That was sudden, you just made this thing move forward without any warnings. Come on, what gives? I literally lurched backwards because of that. "Hey, is your head feelin' alright now?"

"Indeed. I feel as if I had not suffered a vampire's kiss." Look, Marisa, no hands! See? Easy recovery thanks to that stunt I pulled. I never did that on a flying broom before, that made the stunt possibly scary but also an easy dose of adrenaline. "I will bear with your slow pace."

"Oooh no, dude~" I felt a smirk behind me. Don't tell me you're gonna… "Since you ain't gonna be fallin' anytime soon, le'z go for 'nother joyride-da ze!"

I turned to look over my shoulder in a sloooow panning, and I made sure to let my evil smile be seen by her, "I fucking dare you, my friend." My heart was already pumping, my eyes were already narrowed for the wind, my hands were tightening in their grip, and my shoulders were squaring for the blast off.

OH, THIS IS IT! SHE'S SPEEDING UP!

"YA ASKED FOR IT!" HELL YEAH I ASKED FOR IT! FUCKING BLAST US OFF, NOW! "SHOTGUN-DA ZEEEEE‼!‼!‼!‼!‼!‼!"

Should I consider being a Death-Metal Vocalist? I think I just spooked anybody who heard me, human or not (animals included since every bird was flying off the trees) while I was screaming like a dandy guy on drugs—I just can't stop screaming. So many loops, sudden turns, barrel rolls, holy fucking shit it was a hell of a ride, greater than the one yesterday. The fast pumping of my heart totally refilled all of my lost blood, I think I ended up having an overdose on the adrenaline rush as well.

Oh well, I'm already addicted so I'm not complaining. Adrenaline is so much better than cocaine or heroin or marijuana. Fuck anybody who says otherwise.

~~~~~ « ҉ » ~~~~~

[WEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUGGHHHHH!‼!‼!‼!‼!‼]

Reimu sensed them coming—no, that raspy, shrilled screaming gave away their return before her intuition even announced their coming. She wondered how a man could scream like that, and at such a volume as well. The birds resting on the trees of the Hakurei Shrine had scattered to the air, a symphony of tweets and squawks filling the silence along with the hollering. If the Night Sparrow and the Yamabiko were loud during their 'concerts', Eman could pass off as the human equivalent.

Turning around with the nonchalance she usually carried towards the source of the sound, she watched as Marisa and Eman came flying in, straight through the tori gate, heading towards Reimu's face—only to swerve, blowing a gust of wind towards the unfazed Shrine Maiden's face, fluttering her black locks as one of the riders of the broom jumped off to the ground, landing in a roll, then ejecting to the air with a backflip.

As he landed on his feet, he swung both his arms from above his left shoulder towards his right hip as if he was rowing a paddle on a boat. Then he executed the ultimate pose of the century towards the direction of his right: the DAB.

Dip and Dab, baby! Eman was pleased with himself.

The last broom rider flew right behind his dabbing form, both her feet planted on the shaft like a surfboard before her vehicle suddenly pitched upwards, only for her to eject to a backflip towards the ground, fluttering stars around her before she landed, doing the dab just like him, pointing to the very left.

Dippin' Dabbin'-da ze! Marisa had to agree that the pose was actually fun to do.

For the finisher, the flying broom finally returned to the ground, slamming the opposite end of the whisk end towards the cobblestone path.

In the very place of the Hakurei Shrine, Kirisame Marisa on the left patch of open ground and Eman Letitia on the right, especially the broom on the path in-between them, they beseeched all to behold their magnificent display of showmanship and absolute flashiness.

…..

…..…..

The expected derisive or deadpanned comment did not come. The sounds of the cicada calls continued to rattle in the atmosphere, leaving the two to be stuck in their poses until they receive some feedback.

Until….

"Took you two long enough. Come in, you got some explaining to do." Reimu turned towards her shrine, walking up the steps and rounding the donation box.

The two were outraged.

[What!?]
"What!? Come on! Eman an' I just practiced that! Can't ya just give us a feedback or somethin'!?"

"Take us seriously, Priestess! I had to explain for 15 minutes just to make Marisa understand what a Dab is for!"

"Aren't ya impressed or somethin'!? Come on! Ya gotta be at least wide-eyed in surprise as we did that!"

Reimu still continued to walk towards the interior of her shrine, despite the nigh-begging tones of their voices. She already slid the door open, "All you two did was just jump off the broom and cover your eyes. How was that anything interesting?"

Marisa sputtered in her reply, completely exasperated at the complete failure of their performance. Eman's mouth hung from his jaw, unable to process that his host and master was such an unimpressed douche.

"I admit that the broom thing was kinda impressive, you get 2 points for that." Reimu left them a thumbs up before she disappeared to a corner, probably to ready the tea for the explanations.

Her reply only drew more exasperations and incredulousness, the two looking at each other and gesturing wildly with their hands towards the audience who totally ruined the entire dynamite of their performance. No words were said, only raspy breaths and gestured arms. The silent conversation was very interpretable with their body language and facial expressions:

-is she totally like this!?-

-don't ask me, how could I know she was such a party pooper!?-

-aren't you her friend since you were kids!?-

-I know that but I didn't expect her to actually react like that!-

-maybe you fucked it up!-

-this was your idea!-

-cunt!-

-dick!-

-short stack!-

-walking stick!-

-cave woman!-

-fat gorilla!-

They shot each other a hard glare, their expressions so fierce it would not be a surprise if they ended up boring a hole at each other's retinas. Their forms were stiff, legs bent and fists clenched, as if priming to pounce at the other and roll all over the shrine grounds, pulling hairs and strangling throats. An Expert Magician against a Master Runner, the battle would leave them worse for the wear.

They shared an exhausted exhale, their forms sagging in defeat. As they coincided at the stone path where the broom lied, they gave each other a consoling pat on the back and walked with tired steps towards the shrine.

"We'll get her next time."

"Indeed. We will have to rework our choreography before we could actually elicit the Shrine Maiden's cheers."

~~~~~ « ҉ » ~~~~~

We went inside the shrine, settled down in front of the table, Reimu comes back with a tray of that glorious tea and I began letting all the information out (but first, some tea). I sort of began at the part where Marisa left me behind at Kourindou (don't know what the hell she was doing that blowtorch and jerrycan at the time). I then followed along with the part where I coincidentally got to the mansion, and the part where I just got suckerpunched out of nowhere.

"Wait. Wait. Wait." Master held up a hand, "You got punched by that gate guard?"

"Yes, incidentally and accidentally." Somehow, I feel a little embarrassed about it. I wonder why. "But she apologized so there is no grudge held."

"Huh, I guess that explains your red eye." She pointed a finger at the recent injury. "Did it explode somewhat?"

"Wait, it's red?" I felt around my left eye for a bit. Didn't feel any different really. No healed marks despite Patchouli's healings. I'm not even squinting. I guess it just got stained from the blood splosion, I hope it's not a big deal. "I didn't even notice."

"First of all, why did that Chinese girl even hit you? I doubt she'd hit anybody without a good reason to." Beats me, really. Hehe, get it? Beats me 'cause I got beaten up…...I'll shut up now. "Did you do something?"

"No. Her punch just came out of nowhere. Sudden and unexpected that it surprised me."

"Wait-wait-wait!" What is it, Marisa? "I think I get what's happening. Didja say something that made her punch ya?"

…..

"I might have said something before she knocked me unconscious. Why do you ask?"

"Did you, at some point, call her 'China'?" Her face really looked like she wanted to hear the answer, and what's with that shit-eating smirk?

I frowned a little, "What would happen if I do?"

She said nothing, but the smirk was slowly stretching across her lips. Stretching…stretching still.

…

[For a Chinese girl named China, you sure know how to take a break on the job.]

…...

Wait. Don't tell me…..

Let me place my hand on your head here, sweet Marisa. Yeah, just like this. Don't worry, I'm not gonna do anything.

"Um, Eman? What're you doing?" Oh nothing, this is just a friendly gesture from me.

Reimu, please answer me, "Does using the word 'China' as a term of address towards her infuriate Hong Meiling to the point of hitting somebody?"

*Sips tea like nobody's business* "Yes."

Lunch is served.

*FACETABLE!*

FEEL MY PAIN, YOU STUPID CUNT!

"THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT, MARISA! FOR EVERYTHING THAT HAS HAPPENED BECAUSE OF YOUR UNCOUTH NAMING SENSE, YOU PUT ME THROUGH A LOT OF TORTURE FOR IT! NOTHING SHORT OF WHAT'S COMING TO YOU IS NOT WELL-DESERVED!"

She raised her face off the table (nice facial rearrangement, by the way) and—

*Punch!*

A punch to the face. Real Mature, Marisa, Real Mature. "Howz that my fault!? You're the one who went off on yer own like an idiot! Don'tcha know how lucky ya were when you reached that mansion!? You could'a been eaten by a Youkai-ze!"

I wiped the punched cheek with a fist, as if it was stained with blood, which it isn't, but I was still in a mood to punch somebody, namely a short-stacked witch whose actions led to everything that happened to me prior to now. "Says the person who abandoned an outsider to himself with the risk of being killed or eaten alive." I slammed my fist to the table. "If you were actually about to come back, at what time did you actually come back!?"

"Before night! I was handlin' some unfinished business at home-ze!"

"And you took that long to finish!? How were you expecting me to last 15 hours in that Antique Store!?"

*WHACK!*

OW! ANOTHER GOHEI WHACK TO THE HEAD! Why, Master, why!? I've already taken enough punishment for one day! [Ow! What gives!?] I asked in a near-whimper, clawing at the damaged spot.

"No roughhousing inside my shrine." Then why'd you only hit—

*WHACK!* Oh never mind, you gave one to Marisa as well.

"Ow! WHAT THE HELL, REIMU!?" She rubbed her blonde head, gritting her teeth and a few tears leaked out of her eyes.

"Take responsibility, Marisa." *Sips tea like nobody's business*

….You know, Master, even if I know that you went through a lot of stupid and dangerous situations a lot worse than this in your Youkai hunting business, I kinda like how you're still not breaking the calm and carefree shrine maiden look.

"Anyway, you were saying, Eman?"

I sent an exasperated look to Marisa, she just shrugged hopelessly before laying her hat on the table, massaging the lump that's beginning to form. So this is the Hakurei Shrine Maiden, huh? She resolves to whacks upside the head just to pacify the situation between two people yelling at each other?

I might have to carry around that forever-misty ice bag from the mansion whenever these arguments come in.

I had enough problems to deal with that involved physical pain. One of 'em was my BACK hitting the ground from time to time, I don't want my next problem to be HEAD being a victim of Gohei whacks.

I continued on, going with my dinner with Draculina. I told them about the part where they attacked me in the middle of it when I bragged about my skills. The girls got quite the reaction, Marisa was looking impressed, Reimu was somehow frowning. Overall, they were amazed at the fact that I even lasted, and won. After that one, I got to the part where I….uh….woo'd her in the middle of it. That got the two to snicker (snicker in Marisa's case was to explode again, and she wasn't whacked for it), I was kinda intending to make them laugh with the info. Some new editions of the Eman Letitia epic-fail jokes. After that, I skipped over the night assault details. These two will be informed sooner or later, but not now. The excess worry would be a bother, especially Marisa's.

I continued on to the part where I punished Meiling in the middle of the day, the girls were wowing with how I put up a fight against a brawler like Chun Lee. Marisa sure got a cheer for herself, 'calling it' apparently. I also spilled the details on how she exploded my eye but I made sure to mention to Master that I have already forgiven the gate guard before I could raise her concerns even more.

I then began to tell them about why I wasn't angry with Meiling, why I didn't severely punish her, and why I didn't consider it all a punishment. I followed up with the part that I made friends with the gateguard and that I'm hoping to spar with her next time.

I also included the part where I got mind raped by Koakuma, how my thoughts went to the direction of wanting to jump her among other things.

*Snicker*

What the? Master's…laughing at it?

*Snicker!*

Marisa looked like she was about to lose her shit again.

"Um, girls? I plead that you do not see this as a laughing matter, you see. In my religion, sexual depravity and immorality is a strong taboo. Her species is a potential danger to a Christian's moral rights. If I was in an isolated room alone with her, I would have definitely lost my sanity and became her sex slave."

"Ahahahahahahahaha!" Master quickly covered her mouth with a sleeve but it still wasn't enough to hide her laugh.

"BAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"Marisa had already lost it.

[What the!? HEY! THIS ISN'T FUNNY, Y'KNOW!?] "Respect towards women is something that most male outsiders lack, but I am of those who do have respect. I know fully well that Koakuma hadn't intended for it to happen, but what would've happened if she actually intended it, eh!? Falling into senseless sin is the death of me, the ambition of preying every woman I see and bedding them forced into my consciousness would be hell for me."

"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

"AHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

[For fuck's sake, STOP LAUGHING! IF I STARTED PREYING THE TWO OF YOU FIRST, YOU WOULDN'T EVEN BE LAUGHING RIGHT ABOUT NOW!]

"Ah~ That would've been very bad, Eman!" My Master could barely manage a sentence. "You are the most diligent, polite and respectful guy I ever met! And thinking about you hounding every woman you see just like you did Yukari would've been a sight to see! Hahahahahaa!"

*FACETABLE!*

"YEAH!" I felt Marisa's fist slam the surface of the table in the midst of her hysteria. "It's gonna be so funny! Imagine: him chasin' after ladies, sideflippin' like a fuckin' tumbleweed towards 'em while they try to run away! AHAHAhaha!"

*FACETABLE‼*

"I bet when he catches 'em, he'd be like sayin' this in a really sexy, hunky voice~ 'Hey, baby~ Wanna try this flipped side of meat~?'"

*FACETABLE!‼*

"Oh! I doubt they'd say no either! Lotsa girls would'a been swoonin' all over ya if they have a look of your guns! You'd be havin' a harem in the blink of an eye just by bein' naked!"

*FACETABLE‼‼*

"If yer not into bland or plastic broads, there's always the Youkai, y'know! Lots of variety from them-ze!"

*FACETABLE!‼‼*

"If yer gunnin' for a relationship, I doubt they'd say no either! A BIG lot of 'em would kill to nab a guy like you!"

*FACETABLE‼‼‼*

"If I said they'd kill for a guy like you, I'm not even exaggeratin'-ze!"

*FACETABLE!‼‼‼*

"But since you tried to hit on the midget in the Scarlet Devil Mansion las' night, wouldn't be surprised if yer gonna get busy with her sooner or later-ze!"

*FACETABLE‼‼‼‼*

"Marisa, enough, that's not funny. You're doing nothing but adding insult to the wound." Thanks, Master. I'll raise my head off the table now. "But if you're actually considering a relationship with Remilia….careful not to bleed too much."

Forget it. Newest addition to the Eman Letitia Contemporary Art Gallery: Comin' up!

*FACETABLE!‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼‼*

Here you go, dear art enthusiasts. The Latest Addition I shall dub as: 'My Dignity' (My face looked like absolute shit right there). Materials used: The Hakurei Shrine's table, blessed and well-used, and my own face. I'll take your comments for it! Shall we go for a million yen?

"Reimu, I think he already placed his commitment to the table already." My thrilled sister quipped, the mirth poisoning her voice.

I glared at the slighting Witch with the best intensity I could gather, [How 'bout you Shut The Fuck Up, Marisa….!] I turned to the priestess. "And I thought you were actually lending me assistance." I grumbled.

"I'm sorry." She sarcastically/not so sarcastically apologized, grabbing my empty cup and pouring tea to it. "Here, to calm your nerves."

I glanced stupefied at the offered cup, then at her.

You're gonna buy my forgiveness with this?

….….

Okay, gimme it.

*Sip* Ahh~

The headache is still there though. If the cause of it were either Marisa or the table, I seriously don't know anymore.

How the hell was my forehead not bleeding?

I continued on with my story. Not making another attempt of one of my Eman Letitia epic-fail jokes anymore at the part where Meiling kicked me to the ground from the tea table, lest these girls started making jokes about it again (I have a limit, you know). I eventually got to the part where Marisa came in. Couldn't hold myself back from telling EVERY SINGLE DETAIL in the part where I attempted to shank her, from the yard grounds all the way to the rooftop before the two of us eventually fell down.

"Just before the initial moment where the two of us would have hit the ground and died, Sakuya intervened and saved us." I paused, taking a sip from the glorious tea. Ah, always a refreshing warm taste and scent. "After that, we settled down and made peace. Marisa ate some pie, Meiling gave me physical therapy, we eventually left and" I made a gesture to all of us. "Here we are now, retelling my hostess, Priestess Reimu, about my adventurous moments in the Scarlet Devil Mansion wrought about by Marisa's negligence." I motioned to Marisa on this one.

"Hey, at least you got some adventure-da ze!" Marisa exclaimed, patting my back with a little too much force.

Well….I guess it was adventurous. It was actually a moment of taking in some sights of Gensokyo and practically experiencing its greatness. Like having a vacation from work or house or housework. I mean I got attacked (twice at that, nearly in my sleep) but what else can you do? I guess it was a good thing on its own behalf.

I'm agreeing with you on this one, Marisa. Give me one right here.

*High-five!*

I smirked and curled my lips before nodding, Marisa gave me a rather wide grin.

Yeeee~aaaah~

"You know," Oh, Master has something to say. What is it? "It's kind of amazing that you're really carefree with telling your near-death experiences. Other outsiders would've been freaked out, too traumatized to tell."

Hmm Hmm. "I am not 'Other Outsiders', my dear Priestess. I am Letitia Eman, friend and housekeeper, and he is well-versed with near-death experiences. He can climb a steep mountain with a smile on his lips or jump across a ravine with a scream of glee instead of fright and tell you stories about all his adventures afterwards with zest."

She smirked in amusement and sipped her tea, "Apparently, he also likes to fall on his back a couple of times."

"Or land his balls straight to my broom-ze!" Marisa added.

I slammed my forehead to the table before bouncing back right up! [REALLY, MARISA!?]

The two of them eventually lost their shit.

…

It was….infectious.

Don't laugh…! You're supposed to be higher than that!

….

Oh, why the hell not?

"Ahahahahahahahaha!"

"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

[AHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHA!]

~~~~~ « ҉ » ~~~~~

We eventually got into more friendly topics, laughin' all the way while drinking some good ol' tea until Marisa decided to go home for the day. I told her to come back tomorrow morning since Patchouli's request is something I couldn't delay right off the bat. If it's about my blood, I wouldn't be so carefree about it. My blood is something I considered precious.

As Marisa zooms off to the distance of the forest of magic, where her 'house' could be, Master and I settled down on the veranda. Or just me sitting on the veranda, Reimu's sweepin' the premises at the moment while I watched her work. With the collective amount of wind constantly blowing around due to our location at the top of the hill, this makes some dry leaves scattering over here and messing up the piles. She doesn't seem to complain though, I guess this must be happenin' a lot.

And my body is yelling at me to do something.

Damn restlessness, when are you gonna get enough of it? I just made you fight Bruce Lee's female counterpart, chase a witch to the roof of a mansion and you're still beggin' for more?

Geez…..

…...meh, it's alright anyway. If I were to be honest, I wouldn't be thinking twice if it's Reimu I'm helping.

I hopped off the porch and approached Master, the windy breeze blowing some delicious fresh air all around me, the trees swayed, rustling of leaves resonated all around me, and my hair is flaring (holy shit, my hair's standing up! The joyride got me a new hairdo). The tresses were still smooth and silky, even after these days without a bath. I gotta take one as soon as possible.

"Let me take over, Priestess Reimu." I offered as soon as I was beside her, my hand already motioning her to hand the broom over.

She gave me a raised eyebrow, "You just got here."

"So?"

"So you should be resting."

"But I'm not tired yet. I woke up just in the middle of the day," I smirked, "Surely, you must be exhausted yourself from searching for me yesterday."

She rolled her eyes, "Oh please, it didn't take me that long to know where you went." What? "I asked a few villagers and they said you went to the direction of the Misty Lake. Surely you'd be taken in by the Scarlet Devil Mansion."

That…That was actually kind of amazing. You figured that out just by that?

"At what time did Marisa tell you I was gone?"

"By dusk. After that I went to the village for information. Since you were an outsider, pretty much everybody could remember you and your clothes. Makes it easier for me to know where you went."

Huh.

"They also said some stuff about some outsider flipping in the air with some witch, which could be no other than Marisa, yeah?"

Hehe. "Yes." Looks like Marisa and I got ourselves a name in that village, tumblin' like nobody's business. Then again, I used to do that before, all the people watchin' got used to me that they don't stop walking along just to watch anymore, they just go on their way.

"A certain teacher there also told me that she had to stop the two of you from roughing it out and to stop the two of you running all over the rooftops, joyriding." She gave me a stare, "What was that about?"

Including that, should'a known that the word would even reach her ears. All that bullshit in the village was kinda big. Not in the Outside World (hey!) but in this place, where people running all over rooftops aren't so common. Can't believe I got ratted out by the Teach. What was her name again? Keine? "T'was a friendly sparring, our little playtime got a little bit out of hand."

"Really? You two sure have gotten close since you left yesterday. I wish I could've been there and watched you two beat the crap out of each other."

Yeeaahh, you don't wanna see that. It was just a spar, it's not like we were actively hurting each other, right?

...Well, considering how my relationship with Marisa had gotten (where we could finally punch each other in the face and makeup afterwards), our mock/short-fights could go from mild to outright apocalyptic, she'd probably use that fucking megaton laser on me without hesitation.

"Did you share Marisa the information when you found out where I went?" I asked, feeling a smirk coming to break out of my face.

"Sort of." She giggled, "When she asked me if I knew anything just today not so long ago, I told her that I do and she suddenly ranted at me for not sharing it sooner."

"What was your excuse?" Too late, I was already smirking and was awaiting the next set of words eagerly.

"I just said she didn't ask."

[Pppphhhaaaahahahahahahahaaha! Nice one!] Hahahahaha, so rich! It might've took like 2 minutes for Master to find out and Marisa just finds that out TODAY!? Oh geez, ahahahahhahaha! Ah, Marisa, you're such a loser! How long've you been looking for me yesterday, eh!?

I see you're laughing as well, Master. Yeah, the best move you could ever do to the person who abandoned me. That's revenge on my behalf.

"Hahaha. Ah, that was bliss."

"Yeah, I needed that."

I smiled, giving her back a friendly rub along with her smooth black locks hanging there before I took the broom off her hands, "Let me take over now. Go inside the shrine and take a rest, you've done enough for me. Allow me to return the favor."

She sighed, as if she had given in to my insistence, though her smile never went anywhere, even if exasperated, "Looks like I can't stop you now, huh?" Nope, you can't. "Alright, all yours~"

Wait, why was that dragged playfully and mischievously?

*Whoosh*

Oh.

It's the wind. The damn wind is gonna make this job hard for me.

Damn it. Well done, Me, you just took the initiative to finish a chore with a frustrating factor to bother you.

…...Meh, I don't care, I'm more than willing to take this difficult task on. I bet my performance on this one wouldn't even hold a candle to Reimu's usual performance on this task since she does this all the time but it's the thought that counts.

Searching for me means a lot, not doing something in return, even if small, would be a sin to me.

And so, I swept and swept, not really caring about a proper performance on the job, I'm just takin' my time. No rush, I'm enjoying some wind and sunshine at the same time. I don't really like sunshine that much, really. I mean, sunshine is fine and all but getting overheated is a different story.

But the thing is that I was tempted to think that my skin, polished and renewed, cannot be tanned easily. I mean yesterday I kept wearing my jacket all throughout the day, of course, but it's just a thought. I mean this is just wishful thinking, yeah, but I'm willing to test it in this task.

So, I'm gonna take it slow and find out.

*Whistle* ~Sweet Child O Mine~

A second wind blows in and even more leaves come in to the clearing. Sigh, looks like it's another 40 minutes for me.

*Whistle* ~Get out Alive~

The wind suddenly stops, the frustration factor gone for good. Time to be quick and finish this.

*Whistle* ~Cool Down~

There. Done and done. Nothing before me but a leaf and dust-free Hakurei shrine, courtesy by yours truly. Seeing the cleanliness of this place puts a smile to my face, and my reward was a cool shade settling in on the shrine, bright sunshine resting for the day. I looked up and I see a big cloud covering the sun. From the size of it, this cloud will hang around for more than an hour. I might end up sleeping out of it.

[Thanks.] Either thank God or the cloud, I'll just thank both.

Let's see the results:

I pulled on my sleeves and...no tan line. Could it be true? I can't be tanned easily? I was doing this for more than an hour now, I'm pretty sure this could be it.

If not, then I'll find out next time. For now, let's sit down.

Reimu took a spot at the porch in front of the donation box, a tray of edibles and the same old glorious tea on her side, a spare cup set for me. Hmm, rice cake and oranges? Okay, I'll bite.

Hehe, get it?

Setting the broom against the wall, I sat down on the free side beside the tray and poured down the tea on my cup before taking an orange, peeling off the skin.

"Do you like helping people?"

Where's this coming from? "What do you mean?" I asked before I popped an orange in my mouth.

"I mean what I say." She pointed out, "From what I usually see these past days since you came, you work a lot harder when you help than when you work for yourself. That's included on your part to even forgive Meiling like you did."

Oh. "I could say that's partly true." I nodded. There's still my policy to 'Give more' and take an offered reward, you know. "I only help when it's necessary or obligatory, and Meiling's mistake was justified. I emphasize, I'm the one at fault on that part. But if I were to be honest, helping people do feel nice afterwards so I just make do whenever I feel like it."

She tilted her head in a slight angle, "That's kinda odd, coming from a thief like you."

Oh no, not this again. I'm a changed man, please don't even mention that anymore. I had enough!

I heaved a deep sigh, "I was desperate, remember?" How could a thief commit a good deed when doing so wouldn't even compensate his crimes that much? Damn it, there's a flaw on to my last recent words. "I think this impulse to help might've stemmed from the fact that I have taken people's belongings before."

"So you mean you're doing this as compensation?" You're frowning, Master. It's a light frown but seeing it being pointed towards me felt really hurtful. It's like I just broke your trust.

I sighed sharply, looking away and facing forward, "Compensation or not, I want to help either way." There's no lie here. I seriously want to help, in any way that I can. Either small or big, just ask me a favor and I'll do it if I could do it. "I said it before: 'I'm always here when you need me', remember? So please…..don't…..hesitate to ask for my help. Even if you have the Might to fare against a god, I'm still useful. So please…...just say so and I'll do it."

There was silence afterwards, and the orange fruit on my hand didn't look appealing anymore. I was seriously frightened of Reimu's thoughts for me. She had her priorities straight and she demands a trustworthy companion on her side, not some ex-thief who could potentially return to who he once was.

But I want Reimu to understand that I'm not going back to the man I once was. EVER AGAIN.

I. Had. Enough.

"If you say that…." What? "If you say that, then I'm not gonna hand you over to anyone."

Wha-wha-What!?

Ma-Master, there's something really wrong with what you just said there! We're supposed to be a thing before you end up saying stuff like that! Oh dear, my cheeks are already on fire!

Okay, calm down and get clarification without being suspicious, "Do you mean that to my role as your housekeeper?"

"If you wanna call it that, then yes. Why are you asking?"

[Eh,] You don't wanna know so I'll just wave you off. "It's barely a minor concern." But it's a major concern, that is. Not that I'll ever tell you.

Don't give me that raised eyebrow, Reimu. I don't want you to know why right now! "Alright, I'll believe you." Whew. "Now that I have you, you're gonna help me clean up once the party's over. I had enough working on my own, especially with Suika now living in Heaven."

Again, Master, would you please mind the kind of sentences you use? That's too much ammunition for teasings for anybody to load in their rifles and open fire. But I'm delighted that you're asking for my help, though. "Hehe. You make me happy, Priestess Reimu."

"Oh…." The corner of her lip slowly rises, "So you do like helping people." She didn't even make it sound like a question.

*Chuckle* "No matter what you say, I don't care anymore." When she began to giggle, I couldn't resist a smile to go up to my face. This orange fruit in my hand finally looked appealing to me so I didn't hesitate to pluck out a piece and pop it to my mouth, and damn, is it so sweet that I could cry. Reimu must have really good fruits lying around.

We continue to sit down in comfortable silence, not talking unless the topic we have in mind could potentially become animated. Reimu was kinda straightforward (by 'kinda', I mean 'seriously') so she'd be straight to the point and wouldn't hesitate to speak her mind. If that was the case, I'd be bold enough to say she's an honest person. I've seen my share of people who kinda had the same personality like her, but not this direct. So direct that it makes me speechless.

And you know what, I really don't mind. I simply enjoyed her presence.

And her tea too. Gotta make sure to not forget her tea as well, it's the most glorious substance anyone could have in their system. I bet the kiddos would love it too.

"May I ask?" I began, taking a sip of the tea afterwards.

"What?"

"I know that you tolerate me, and I couldn't thank you enough for that," Because it seriously means a LOTto me. "but how do you see me? As a former thief, I mean."

It didn't actually take long for her to answer, "Even if you're still a thief, you're not that different from all the people who keep coming here. Yukari's a complete hag, Suika's a complete drunk, and guess what: Marisa's a complete thief, probably worse than you are, and she calls it 'borrowing till she's dead-ze'."

Ho ho. Nice mimic there, Master. That actually sounded a lot accurate than I give you credit for. Do you do that in your spare time? "Wow….'Borrowing till the time of her death'? That is such an innocuous way to describe 'Raiding'."

"You wouldn't believe just how many people she 'borrowed' from." She gave me a rather lazy glance, "Just hope that you're not gonna be the next person she borrows from."

"If she ever does, I have a touch of security in my person and will use it against her." I gave up thievery since the day I came to Gensokyo, and if Marisa starts stealing my shit, I'm so gonna explode on her. A lot of people might've suffered from my actions (and I regretted it ever since I realized it) and I don't want hers doing the same to others as well.

She hmph'ed, "Good luck with that. But one thing's the same about all of them: even if they're not here to worship, they don't leave a donation. If they're going to eat my food, drink my tea or simply be there and bother me all day, can't they just leave at least one yen?"

Huh. Even your friends and neighbors, they're not giving ya anything? Damn, you're really having it rough on your part as the problem solver of Gensokyo.

I mean, COME ON! She's the life-force of Gensokyo, can't she at least have some thanks from anybody for putting her own life in trouble for the people here? Remilia told me a lot about you, Reimu. You are famous. You deserve some credit, like, seriously.

If that's going to be the case for a long time, then how about a gift, eh?

If there's one thing you should know about me, it's that I don't want to be labeled or put in a category.

Being like Master's usual guests is not who I want to be.

I haven't changed my pants yet so I still have the payment Rinnosuke boy gave me. Zipping my pocket open, I made sure to not make clinking sounds as I fished for at least one generous coin. When I do, I took it out, zipping my pocket close before I looked at the amount: A single 500 yen coin.

Reimu's eyes instantly lit up in flames the sooner she saw what I held in me hand. Ha ha, she looks like a cute doggy seeing a treat on her master's hand. Just how often do your friends and worshipers not give you any donations, eh? You poor thing.

Let's see what happens when I do this.

I flicked the coin with my thumb, resonating a nice ping, angling its flight behind me, her eyes followed it so sharply like a cobra and the sound of it slipping through the gaps of the donation box before it hit the bottom surface with a (seriously tear-jerking) clatter signifies a 3-pointer. Go me.

Her gasp was the sound of the century, I just couldn't believe her reaction. Her body's seriously unmoving and her mouth's seriously unhinging, completely unbelieving of this miraculous happening in her life.

Geez, Reimu. Just how were you poor? Meiling even said it, you are the strongest human in Gensokyo, yet you don't get money out of it? All that money could've been used to improve your shrine but look at this place, it's so rundown. Why won't anybody pay you for everything, eh?

Anyway, time to come back to life, Master. I reached over, placing two fingers below her soft chin and closed it.

Let There Be Life!

"Uh…uh…! Th-thank you, Eman." She stuttered a little, flustered and red-cheeked. That's a rather cute face for you though, Reimu, "I mean, thank you so much! It's been a long time since anybody donated." And she nervously drank her tea, downing almost all of it.

I chuckled lightheartedly, reaching for her head and stroked her soft black locks before patting gently twice, "You're welcome."

Maybe I should bait her with offerings if I wanted something from her. Oh ho, it's gonna be great.

Oh. My tea's out, gotta refill.

I reached for the teapot and a feminine hand brushes with my own. I looked up and the owner of that hand happened to be a still-flustered Reimu. Oh shit, a romantic cliché moment right here!

Pull away! "Uh, yo-you first." Damn me for stuttering, but at least I maintained a levelheaded tone on my voice. Thank God I don't feel so internally flustered, otherwise she'd notice the red on my face.

"Thanks." Her usual disposition managed to come back, which was kinda refreshing. Her new blushy face was indeed cute but I don't really want her to break out of her usual coolness. I kinda liked that part about her. "What are you being flustered about?"

"Uh..uh—" I don't know how I knew but if I try to deny anything, I'll be seen through. "Nothing important, Priestess Reimu. Believe me."

…..

Don't look at me like that, Master, you look like you're boring those black orbs to my bones. "Okay."

Hoo. Thank God, I don't think I'd be able to calm down from the situation if it ever happened.

….

She staring at me expectantly, the teapot in her hand.

"What?"

She frowned, "What do you mean 'what'? Bring your cup here."

Oops, "Sorry." I grabbed my empty cup and brought close to her. Steadily, she poured down another serving of green tea to the contents, the steam almost imperceptible now that it's losing its warm temperature.

Satisfied, she lowered the pot down to the tray. "That's the least I could do for all your services and patronage."

Huh.

This is all you could give in return? Heh, it's not much but it's a sign that she appreciates my efforts. Who am I to not appreciate it?

I gestured my cup to her, she looked at me quizzically before she somehow got what I wanted her to do. "It ain't sake, you know."

I smirked, "Do you care?"

She raised her eyebrow a little before she smiled in turn, "No." She took her cup in hand and collided it together with my own, a small thud of solid resonating on the impact. "Kampai." She announced casually before drinking from it delicately.

[Cheers.] I followed.

~~~~~ « ҉ » ~~~~~

After a while, we're making way to emptying the tray of its edible contents, even the tea is getting sucked out dry by our tea-obsessed bellies. Down to the last rice cake, she offered to have it halved for the both of us. She had me hold it on one side while she had the other, we broke it and we consumed the last of it. Like breaking bread.

Is it safe to assume that Reimu and I have become partners? The thought of it sounds nice.

"Once the party is over and my job to clean up is done, will you continue to rely on me?" I asked, crackling my knuckles to loosen the tension.

"Nnggh," She stretched a little, raising her hands above her head. Whoa, pale armpits. "Yeah sure. This ain't the last party of the shrine anyway."

So you're just gonna make me clean up after every party? Shouldn't there be more tasks for me to do for you besides that?

Of course, there is. I'd just make the initiative without prompt. I refuse to be a slave to my obligations after all. I'm not a workaholic like she thought I was. I'll prove her wrong, sooner or later.

"Then shall we make it formal and" [Shake on it?] I offered jovially.

Reimu raised a really confused eyebrow, "What?"

"Ah, hehe." Totally forgot that Japanese folks like her aren't really influenced from us westerners like their real world counterparts. "It's a way my people do when they cordially commit something to a friend, coworker or acquaintance." I took the initiative, my hand ready to take her hand. "Hold on to my hand."

She gave me a glance to my hand, then my face, then she does what is told: her small soft hand, a hand that held on to the gohei of pain that punished slanderers and malicious Youkai, held on to my own with a rather above-female-standard grip.

On my fingers.

Oy. "Like this." I shifted my hand and I had her palm meeting mine, thumbs interlocked and four remaining fingers curled around the other. "Then shake it up and down." And she does. Slowly and in a rather inexperienced manner, she shakes it up and down. Her grip was warm and comfortable, and the fact that she had probably never done this before kinda makes it cute.

I don't wanna let go. Too bad I had to.

I gave a smile, she returned a rather charming smile of her own. My, my. I never knew you would look so pretty smiling like that to me. I think I'm falling for you.

Boy, am I glad to be working with/for her.

"Looking forward to working with you, Master."

"Likewise, Eman."

No words could describe how much I really wanted her to say that, and I never felt this happy in a long time.

Yeah, you and me, Master. You can rely on me, anytime you like. Soon enough, maybe I could see how you could return a favor. Returning it with tea is a rather mild but really appreciated gesture. I patiently await the next one, no matter how long.

I took the tray in my hands—

"No." wha-what? "I'll clean it up. You've done enough, it's your turn to go inside and take a rest." Says she as she took the tray off my hands and walked back to the kitchen, her black waist-length hair wrapped in a ponytail swishing side to side on each step, her footsteps slightly muffled from her socks until she disappeared from a corner.

He he he. Should I be considered lucky to have her favor like that?

Hmm….meh. Probably other people already had the privilege, but it doesn't mean I shouldn't take pride in it. I'll be happy either way.

And so, with a backward roll off the veranda and into the shrine interior, feeling the wooden floors from the middle of my waist to my left shoulder, I fluidly brought myself to a standing position with the use of my arms before I walked over to my room, entered through the flap of my tent and took out my phone and earplugs, now daring to spend my time listening to music all afternoon.

Not like I have anything better to do anyway.

…...

…...…...

I wonder if Lady Yukari's gonna make a comment about this relationship.

…...

Probably.

…..

No.

She'll DEFINITELY say something about it. There's a load of ammunition right now, and I hauled them over with a cargo ship. Lady Yukari, you better not hint anything to Master or there'll be hell to pay.

~~~~~ « ҉ » ~~~~~

Yukari-sama, you better not hint anything to Master or there'll be hell to pay.

Yukari smirked, finding the irony in his thoughts too hilarious to be laughed at.

"Ufufu~ My, looks like my sweet little Reimu's already gotten a potential suitor. I was starting to wonder when she will ever find a man in her life. It seems my next visit's going to be much more fun." She conjured a nigh-realistic image of Reimu and Eman, a Shintoist individual and a Christian holding hands inside her head. She chuckled at such an occurrence, "Maybe in this generation, the continuous line of loveless marriages among all Hakurei Shrine Maidens may finally reach their end."

With a wave of her hand, the two surveillance gaps presenting the two clueless lovebirds closed. She turned around and willed the 'door' to her personal realm to open. Stepping in, she was greeted with nothing but purple darkness. The 'Realm of Nothing', she dubbed, there was almost nothing everywhere, from the sky to the ground, which was nothing but a standing ocean, no gravity nor did wind disturb its perfect equilibrium except for Yukari's two feet.

So much tears. She gloomily remarked.

There was light, however. Up above, in the center of the skies was a single yellow Eye, its size rivaling the moon that had gotten too close to the earth, always looking, always glaring, always seeing, and never blinking. But that was only it, it's just an Eye. It doesn't give light nor does it shine upon the land as it 'gazes' the nothingness, not even the standing sea reflected it. It was just there, for theatrics. Yukari thought that every realm needs a little light.

Taking two steps forward, she looked about, searching for 2 certain shikigami lying on the surface. Now where could those two be? Surely she would have recovered, all this amount of tears could only signify past a novemdecillion years of crying. Did that pompous idiot even make an effort in helping her move on?

When she saw nothing, she jabbed the nonexistent ground thrice with the point of her folded umbrella, disturbing the equilibrium of the black ocean, three circles expanding outwards from the point as three wooden thuds resonated as if she just struck wood.

Then she waited.

And waited.

…..

And waited.

*ROOOOAAAAARRRR!‼‼*

*Roooooaaaaaaarrrrr!‼‼*

A second echo. She did recover.

She smiled with pure gratification as the figure of one of her longest living Shikigami, much older than Ran, later arrived. From the edge of the horizon, his form slowly enlarged as his form finally reached her. His outstanding size loomed over Yukari, and she looked at the Great King with nostalgic eyes.

The Beast's advanced appearance was laid bare to Yukari's eyes, such a form that should not even exist in the natural world. The beast before her eyes violated everything that respected the laws of reality and reality itself. Insanely leathery skin that shined like the scales of the dragon and bristled like the fur of beasts. His claws, seemingly like the rib cage of a dragon, curling like flexible muscle in spite of its rigid appearance in the Sage's presence. His 3 wings, an absolute butchery of everything that lived to rule the skies. Gryphon feathers, phoenix fur, elder dragon webbings, and Roc skin. His tale, long enough to reach the very end of this realm, serrated, coiled, and scaly, it slowly retracted to a shorter tail, its point dripping from the tears of his Queen. His eyes, bright and glowing yellow with the centuries of wisdom welling in them, he looked at his Master with a wistful gaze, not the usual stern and fierce expression. The one thing that never changes no matter how he advances himself is his powerful red mane that framed his entire face, a symbol of his royalty, regal pride, and his almighty authority over creation.

"I missed you, my little President." She sincerely greeted, melancholic tears filling her eyes as she laid her hand against his fleshy yet smooth snout. The King closed his eyes, the familiar sensation of his Master's hand refreshing his sweetest memories as a youngling being cradled in Yukari's arms, loved and cared for.

And as always, the Queen Mother always comes after him, her presence finally known as she stepped forward to her shared Master's presence, laying down beside her husband to grant Yukari easy access to her snout for pets.

"You too, my little Councilor." She lowered her parasol down to the ocean surface to float before she placed her free hand on her snout. Managing a glimpse of her eyes before they closed in content to Yukari's touch, she noticed that they aren't so swollen like she expected.

It seems this one had recovered long ago.

Yukari's gaze roamed all over her form, slightly surprised that she, too, had advanced to a higher stage of existence in her own time, but not far enough to match her husband's. If the King's form was grotesque and extremely overbearing that spoke unspeakable amounts of power with his mere presence, the Queen Mother's form was alluring and overwhelmingly attractive—a complete contradictory. Her slender build that moved forever in an alluring sway, her pale flesh lined with the skin of all who were beautiful, from the lost scales of the elegant Leviathan of the sea to the lithe Dragon of the sky. Her wings folded by her side, shining in ways that weren't possible despite the murky darkness of the realm, they glowed with an enchanting light, creating a source of illumination besides the Eye above. Her jaws containing her teeth, jut out to display her hidden ferocity to her cornered prey had grown longer than before. Her horns, jut out above her closed eyelids that hid the beautiful blue orbs containing an unspeakable gaze of affection unfit for an advanced being like her, they had grown much longer as well, curving in ways that could both entrance prey and be used as a weapon in fierce combat. The unlimited spikes that coated her body like natural thorns, flexing and curling in rhythm of her breathing, they had grown longer and sharper. Not a single being could touch her except the King and those she allows, especially her Master.

Yukari felt a wave of nostalgia as the memories brought her back with these two at her side as one of the oldest shikigami under her rule. The two completely contrasted each other in so many ways, one including the fact that the King was a rather brutal and fierce creature, killing and eating everything that prided itself as the strongest of its kind, always quick to compete in terms of power and authority. Many other kings and queens that ruled and hailed, he overthrew them all and took away what they owned for himself. He was a very proud King, and those who were lucky enough to look at the first sight of him never left his presence without losing some of their sanity or their lives. The Queen Mother was not so violent, she was a creature far gentler than her husband. She sits on her throne singing, dancing, meditating, and always dreaming of futures full of life and endless happiness. She even has a soft spot of younglings, no matter the species, human or not, always quick to approach them and hand out her maternal love and affection to them. It doesn't make her a monster to be taken lightly, however, she is just as fierce as her beloved when the situation calls for it. Let the higher beings have mercy on all who incur her wrath.

Yukari briefly remembered their violent past, the catastrophic incidents they created that once left her no room to rest until she managed to reign them into her control before they destroyed half the world. The King dominated Mother Nature Herself to her knees by the mutter of his voice, so many typhoons, tornadoes, floods, tsunamis, droughts, hailstorms, hellfire, eruptions, earthquakes, so many had occurred all at once just to make the world know his grief. Many casualties had been claimed, kingdoms ruined, villages destroyed, it was almost the end of the world. The Queen was no different, she altered so much of history, she wrought out the plague, she created the great culling with her subjects, she delivered the extinction of many species, she destroyed thousands of ecosystems that killed even more species down to the brink of nonexistence. She was the one who suffered the most, and anything that breathed suffered the punishment by proxy. Her authority as a Queen gave her so much power, nobody ever denied her command, not even the proudest creature denied her. It cost them both dearly, and much of Yukari's love for them had waned, thus their rest in the realm, as a form of discipline and punishment. The world was too frail to bear beings like them.

But now, to see them like this, so contained, self-controlled, and meek, after years of rest and repose, they had matured into fine adults. Yukari's heart was proud to see her subjects this way. This must be how a mother feels when she sees her children growing up well.

"Look at you both, all grown up."

The two Royal Authorities hummed at the praise, appreciating her magical touch. Her touch, only her touch alone left them euphoric and at ease.

Yukari's nose flared, and instantly she frowned, boring down her bright yellow eyes on them. The Eye above began to shine actual light, its iris pointed towards the Overseer of Gensokyo and her freshly awoken servants like a spotlight. No mortal mind would have survived the mere sight of the two beings without becoming an undecipherable mess of fragments.

"Have you two been sneaking out? I could smell the desert in your fur." She sniffed again, this time her nose crinkled in disgust, "And you both reek of hormones. What were you two doing while I wasn't watching?" She made no effort to hide the disdain of her voice, she really demanded to know what was going on.

The King made no sense to reply. It was understandable, his voice was a supernatural hazard, best contained lest a repeat of his Armageddon occurs. It was safe for him to speak in this realm since it wasn't the natural world, but it seemed to have become a habit for him to not speak at all. Luckily, his wife makes a nice interpreter.

"Your punishment left its mark on us. We couldn't bear such countless years in this realm, my sweet Master. We tried to cope with our situation, resorting to leisure ourselves with the stories of our kingdoms and company." The Queen Mother's voice was slow and gentle, the tone carrying a flow similar to a clean tranquil river, a slight accent lining her language as she likely hasn't practiced her Nihongo well.

Yukari took a deep breath as the goose bumps rolled all over her body, she hadn't realized how much she missed listening to the motherly voice of the Queen until now. Even though she was the Master, her shikigami could take initiative as some form of emotional authority and support in any chance given.

"You were using omnipresence, haven't you?" She asked the King. Even though it was the wife who spoke, she was more of a voice to her husband than anything else.

The King doesn't look too apologetic, only proud of it. The Queen was the only person to look shameful, "Indeed, but we have respected your wishes and made sure to leave you be. We never wrought out our powers in the natural world, not even once. You have our word."

Yukari hummed cryptically, raising an eyebrow. The Queen wasn't likely to lie to her, and the King was too proud to even lie at all, and if her words was to be believed, then these two have truly matured. Without her supervision, there has not been a repeat of disastrous events caused by only these two since then, except for the natural ones. They were no longer reckless beasts so quick to submit to their urges, they were now disciplined beings, capable of reason and thought. They no longer needed a Master at all to keep them in check.

An eternity sure taught these two well.

"I see." She released her hold on both of them, stepping back to give them a little bit of space and one more look over. The two beasts slowly rose to their full height, standing tall and proud like the castles they once ruled, and their authority rolled off their beings like a cloud. These two were forces of nature, the kind that even the gods of the earth fear, and they bend their knee to Yukari, and Yukari alone. The Sage was proud to have them.

Not that they have long together with me.

"Have you two been busy in my absence? Are you two doing well?" Yukari asked.

"We have." Yukari saw a small blush light up at the Queen's cheek as she shyly looked away, "How many times have we made love, I could no longer remember. But besides that, we even found a new subject under our command." She informed with a rather jovial tone.

"Hm." Yukari frowned again. These two have been getting bolder and bolder since she last met them. They even formed a shikigami pact with somebody she didn't even meet. These two were starting to miss the point of being a shikigami. They were not to do such things on their own volition, they are to be the extension of her will, like a second body of the same mind. "Again?"

"Indeed." The Queen nodded, and Yukari saw the certain haughtiness in the King's eyes. He was still proud of it and is not apologetic, "Our chosen subject was such a soldier. She suffered through all of the challenges we set for her and succeeded every single one. I see no reason to not take her in."

"Without my consent?" Yukari was about to consider debugging them both, but with the limited amount of free space these two had, especially with pre-programmed applications stuck in their systems that filled most of them, she couldn't risk it. She could end up creating a worm. She sighed, "Whatever, as long as your judgment is trustworthy."

"Our judgment is always worth your trust, my sweet Master." The identity of their being; the mark of their strength; their Pride had begun to show itself with that one reply, "You made us to be perfect, therefore we can never disappoint."

Yukari forgot that these two were signified by their Pride, and she hadn't realized she had missed that from them too. The Pride of being her tool, the Pride of being the perfect servant, the Pride of being the greatest existence to ever be handpicked by the Youkai of Boundaries. "I know, you always tell me that."

Forever and always you tell me the same thing, and your performance was forever perfect. Too perfect.

"Come along, you have more than a novemdecillion years' worth of catching up." She picked up her parasol, opened it to rest it on her shoulder and turned around, walking forward as the Eye above followed her like a spotlight. The two beasts followed close behind, their steps not so imposing and great despite their gargantuan sizes that it didn't even disturb the very waters they lay their foot on.

"To bring ourselves up to date with your personal progresses, I assume, my sweet Master?" The Queen asked behind her.

"Yes." Yukari replied. There was no point in all the walking she was doing, there was no end point inside the Realm, she could just open up a gap straight to the rendezvous point and introduce them to the progresses of her work but first things always comes first. "My newest and greatest creation, Gensokyo. A land for the forgotten and the unwanted. You two will take residence there, as your new home."

The King and Queen shared a delighted look at each other. The prospect of a new home, and an official release of their punishment was more than enough for the both of them. Such a thing is nothing but joyous celebrations to the ears of both shikigami, but despite such emotions they refrained from showing much, only their facial expressions sufficed. "It is a blessing, my sweet Master."

"I assume you're both glad to finally be free from your discipline cage?"

"Indeed." The relief in the Queen's voice was unmistakable, "This place has become dull after all these years. No joy is to be found here."

"Even though you've been sneaking out?"

"Not me myself." This time the Queen wasn't playing the voice of her Husband, "I alone cannot leave, since the day my beloved here had long given me my freedom. But with every visit, there were stories to tell so I was not as bored as this land wants me to be."

So you released her from the contract of the shikigami? The Youkai Sage thought in silent disbelief. No wonder the bind that was connected to her and the female Beast was no longer felt in this realm. The Queen was no longer a servant, she was a free being, a Mistress of her own right. She may no longer bear the powers of her Sweet Master and husband anymore but her own personal strength still permits her as a being above gods. She had all the free will to rule and conquer once again, no longer bound by consent, yet she continues to submit herself to her husband and still continues to call her 'Sweet Master'.

What has these two been truly doing in my absence? The two had truly matured, exceeding even the expectations Yukari had. She might have to revise her plans due to this development later. "Congratulations on being free."

"Thank you, my sweet Master."

Yukari smiled, opening a gap in front of her, leading to the meeting zone. "This is it." She turned around, once again facing the two of them, "Just so you know. I have two new Shikigamis with me. Well, the second one is a shikigami to my shikigami, actually."

"Ah, the ones who took our place." The King nodded in understanding as the Queen spoke, "I assume this creature is a mighty one, able to bind a subject of her own."

"A nine-tailed kitsune, specifically." Yukari noted the slight rising of the King's eyebrow, signifying his interest on the species her current servant was, "Her shikigami is a bakeneko, yet the little tool is yet to meet my expectations."

Yukari noticed the silent eagerness in the King's body language, "I am eager to meet this fox and see for myself her strength." The Queen now spoke for herself, "I myself am eager to meet this feline subject of hers. Judging by your tone, she seems to be a young and immature creature."

"Correct." Yukari nodded, "With those two, we shall get rid of your dust, polish your rust off you, make you adapt to the nourishing air of my creation—and as for you," She addressed the Queen, "You will finally meet the world once again."

The elated expression of the Queen spoke all of the emotions welling within her, her form was stiff in keeping herself from leaping out of joy, "Gracious, my sweet Master." She bowed.

Yukari giggled good-naturedly, "Wear your best clothing, okay? I have a strict dress code in Gensokyo. I don't want my residents losing their minds at the first sight of you."

The two Authorities bowed, "Of course." With that, their forms began to contort and shift.

Yukari turned around, giving them their privacy as they changed. "Come out when I say so." Stepping through the gap, she stepped onto the grass, inhaled the natural air of the world and finally met up with Ran and Chen, who seemed to have been newly arrived, "How long was it?"

"1 minute and 11 seconds, Yukari-sama." Ran answered.

"Was the talking quick?" Chen asked.

"Not really." Time sure does move slow inside. "It feels like I have been gone for 30 minutes."

"Of course. We'll we see them, Yukari-sama?" Ran asked, visible signs of tension in her arms and legs despite the calm and stoic exterior of her face. She had been warned of the outcome of this meeting between past servants and current ones.

Yukari held nothing back with a smile, "Indeed. I hope you two are ready, your seniors are quite eager to meet you," She turned to Chen with a devious grin, switching to a darker tone in her voice, "and put you to the test."

"I'm not worried!" Chen chirped, unfazed at the implications, "Ran-sama and I've been training since Sunday! Right, Ran-sama?" She seems to be quite obedient today, what was Ran feeding her to make her this way? Was the kitty excited about fighting?

"Yes, Chen." Ran gave her servant a warm smile, "Remember what I taught you, okay?"

"Yes, Ran-sama!"

"Delightful!" Yukari clasped her hands together, the hook of the parasol handle around her wrist, "That means you two are more than ready." She turned to the gap behind her as she stepped aside to make way, showing nothing within the dimensional rift but a violet field of gaping eyes. "You can come out now."

Ran's tails went stiff, her eyes became bestial, her arms inside her intersected sleeves tensed in preparation, more than 8 centuries worth of magic brewing around her entire form as she stood at attention, primed and ready. Chen crouched low on the ground, baring teeth and claws just like a threatened cat, the shared power brewing in their magical cores, almost overflowing that it made them feel like gods, from Yukari to Ran and from Ran to Chen, their powers multiplied tenfold at the task before them. In this state, even the Hakurei Shrine Maiden would have a hard time against them.

After a few seconds of nervous silence, a bronze-furred paw poked out from the gap and laid its first step on Gensokyo grounds. As the second paw poked itself from the gap and took the second step, a beastly snout soon presented itself, followed by a golden countenance containing the mighty authority Yukari warned about, a powerful sun-like gaze stared back at Ran's own, and she suddenly felt herself looking small. The rumored fiery red mane that symbolized his rule over nature came into sight, framing his entire face like a powerful leader. His golden-glazed body soon presented itself, glistening like pure gold in the sunlight of the midafternoon. Small shades of bronze were found on the least prominent parts of his body, especially the underbelly. His four limbs, well-toned and fine-shaped to outrun any prey, moved with grace, befitting a person of higher grounds. And the last part of the beast, his tail, finally came to be, a slender golden appendage ending with a tuft of red fur.

A Lion, fitting. Yukari remarked mentally. Among all the shapes the King could have chosen, from a noble beast from forgotten lore to a beautiful human, it had to be a Lion, the first creature he once was before he became advanced. Just like the old times.

With each imposing step the 'King' took, the greenery around the Mayohiga clearing began to lean forward towards the ground, as if the very plant life was prostrating themselves in the presence of this beast. The stories were true, Ran confirmed, this one had indeed enslaved Mother Nature itself and could command her at his will. The Kitsune was starting to wonder if her chances against her senior was vast, his mere presence spoke unspeakable amounts of power.

Another paw of similar structure yet smaller to the King's came out of the gap, this time with the fur colored pale white, then followed the second. Soon, another lion presented itself out of the gap, moving with such grace and elegance that wasn't possible for such a creature, lither than the King's taut movements. This one, however, had no mane, and her fur was colored pure white like milk, shining like the silver of a blade against the sunlight. Her eyes were a bright blue, Ran was almost certain she could see both the sea and the clear blue sky inside them as they regarded Chen stoically. This 'Queen' also seemed larger than the outside world's lions, two times larger than average one while the King was three times larger, his structure even taller than Yukari and much more imposing.

"Meet your seniors, Chen, Ran." Yukari introduced, smiling impishly at her two shikigami that were certainly tense, trembling and extremely wary, "Be prepared, they are about to put you into shape to make sure you are exactly at their level."

Without warning, the King broke into a sprint towards Ran, his mouth parting slightly to revel sharp teeth that could no doubt crack her skull open without even the slightest thought. The Kitsune couldn't face away from the force of nature coming straight towards her like a tsunami, she was certain the other lion had charged forward to clash against Chen. She couldn't confirm what happened in her peripheral vision, but she also heard a yelp from her shikigami. She wanted to see what happened but she couldn't turn away. Her opponent was too great to be ignored.

Parting her hands and baring her claws, Ran prepared the strongest spell card—

The King stood on his hind legs, his outstanding height crushing the very significance of the nine-tailed Kitsune's dignity as the strongest Beast Youkai in Gensokyo. Slamming his front legs back to the ground, causing a sudden tremor, making the trees quiver in fear and causing Ran to stumble in her footing, the very container of the Lion's power cracked open, its contents spilling out of his form and made itself known to the Shikigami's mathematical senses, and she gaped at the calculated revelation before her.

She was nothing but a pond compared to the ocean of power before her.

As the Lion released the Voice, Ran's consciousness only lasted for a single second before she crumbled to the ground, humbled and defeated.

She passed the test, the King declared.