Mr. Grey pulled my chair out for me first. Then he pushed it in and sat down opposite me. I told him I didn't want to go anywhere fancy, so he brought me to a not-so-ritzy-but-still-high-end restaurant. We ordered; both getting the steak with mashed potatoes. He's a man of good taste in food, at least. Once the waiter was gone, Mr. Grey rested his elbows on the white tablecloth and stared at me.
"Not into fancy dining?" "I've never really liked eating in restaurants. We ate a lot at home when I was younger; I guess I developed a liking of it." Mr. Grey considered this for a second. "Your father, he's an auditor?" "Of sorts," I took a sip of my water, really not wanting to continue this conversation on my dad's work. To my surprise, Mr. Grey seemed to take the cue. He sat back more casually and folded his hand loosely together.
"He's very protective of you, isn't he?" "Yes. He's always been like that." "And your mother? Is she the same?" Oh god, my mother…. "Uh, n-no. My mom is….." I couldn't finish, instead electing to stare down at my hands. A slight shade of horror washed over Mr. Grey's face. "I'm sorry. How old were you when she…..?" "Three days old. She… died in the hospital," after being stabbed by a rival gang member. Daddy never talked about the incident or her; I learned all this from Jerome when I was ten years old. He told me after I asked why I didn't have a mother- like seemingly at all. It's also the reason why Daddy's so protective over me; he only wants to lose one woman in his life I bet.
"You were so young! Did your father raise you all alone?" "Well, no; we had a lot of… family around to help out." And how. Mr. Grey nodded. "You come from a big family, then?" "I guess you could say that," my eyes lowered. None of this was technically lying… but it still felt weird, namely because for some reason….. I didn't want to lie to him. I didn't feel emotionally comfortable lying to Mr. Grey; wasn't sure if this was a good sign or not.
"What about you? What's your family like?" I decided now was the perfect opportunity to get off the topic of my ahem, "family". Mr. Grey blinked up at me, a little taken aback by my question. I doubt he was used to talking about himself; at least this openly. "My mother's a doctor; my father's a lawyer and businessman. They adopted me, my sister Mia, and my brother Elliot." "You're adopted?!" This surprised me, which in turn also surprised me. He nodded gently. "It's not something I usually share with people." I can see why…. wait, no I can't. It's nothing to be ashamed of. It's not like you came from a multi-millionaire gang lord clan or anything; insert eyeroll at the irony here.
"We don't have to talk about this if you don't want to, Mr. Grey. We can talk about whatever you want." "How do you know the detective from the station?" Oh, what a wonderful turn; great job there, Ana. He didn't even hesitate to ask. "He's a childhood friend; we met in junior high." "He seems to like you a great deal," I detected a peppering of jealousy in his tone. "I doubt it; he turned me down in high school." "That was what, ten years ago? People's tastes change." Gees, he wasn't going to let this go, was he? I let out a sly, exasperated sigh. "Well, it wouldn't make a difference now." "What makes you say that?" He sounded a little stunned by my comment. "He's a close friend; that's how I want it to stay," I said flatly. That's wholly true; if Daddy suspected that I loved Paul…. I wanted him close. And that meant staying in the friendship zone- at least on my side. I can't love Paul…. I can't.
Mr. Grey had the curtesy to wait a minute before resuming the conversation. "Anastasia, may I tell you something?" I nodded slowly. He leaned in a smidgen towards me. "You always have this air of sadness about you." My eyes began to grow. I do? I suppose that makes sense; I wasn't particularly happy with life right now. A dangerous informant was searching for me, Daddy hired the Hulk to track him down and probably kill him, I can't marry for love, and to top it off, I'll be head of the Dollars one day. Put that way, it's no wonder I looked depressed. Mr. Grey didn't seem satisfied with this though.
"Did something happen?" No reply on my end; I can't talk about any of this to him. I merely gazed down at my clasped hands on my lap. "Anastasia?" Still nothing. Then he sighed, sitting back in his chair and rubbing his finger over his lip in a pondering fashion. "Now you tell me something." "Huh?" I blinked up at him puzzled. "I just told you something; now it's your turn." "Uh, what do you want me to say?" "Anything. Tell me a secret." A secret, huh? Well here's one…. but it's not a secret from him.
"I want to fall in love and get married someday," I blurted out faster than expected. "What?" This appeared to befuddle him, to which I continued. "I want real love; I want to marry whoever I please." If I can't have a normal life, then I at least want an ordinary love life. Though this wasn't a secret from Mr. Grey; it was one I had to keep from Daddy and the Dollars, despite them likely already knowing.
"A-Anastasia!" Mr. Grey gasped; I don't think this is what he had in mind. But I could see him quickly putting the mental pieces together; his eyes revealed everything…. He looked at me; looked at me and reflected. "Why is that a secret? I should think that's obvious." "Not for me," I frowned. When neither of us said anything more, staring into each other's eyes, I smiled. To be honest, it felt kinda good telling someone that. Usually I had to keep all of those negative feelings bottled up inside of me, and although it wasn't much, it was still something. Something very dear and important to my heart- and he was the first person on earth I'd told this. That made me feel…. good. And for the first time in a long time, I smiled. Just like him back at the office, I sincerely smiled.
Of course, Mr. Grey noticed this right away; his own face lighting up a little in automatic response. "Ok, now you tell me a secret." "A secret?" He blinked, startled by my sudden prompting. Still, I continued to radiate a smile. "Anything; whatever you're comfortable with." "Well, what did you have in mind?" "Hmmmmm, tell me more about that brunette you mentioned at the tea shop….. only if you want to!" I had to add in the proviso. He stared at me for the longest second, looking a little shell-shocked. I think he was actually lost for words at first. I was about to start apologizing when he then also smiled- a glorious, perfect smile. And his eyes….. don't even get me started. I could admire his beauty without falling in love, right?
"She's someone very dear to my heart; she's been there for eight years now." Oh, I wonder if she died or left him or something. He didn't sound sad when he spoke about her; not like last time. "Where is she now? Is she….?" "She's close now…. But it was her who made me realize…
Closeness has nothing to do with distance."