I own nothing. The Touhou Project series belongs to ZUN and Team Shanghai Alice.

After staying at Kasen's for the night, he went back to the pit of ash and alcohol that was the Underground. He crossed paths with Parsee, who looked a bit irritated. "Hey, are you doing okay? You seem to be in a bad mood."

"No, I'm not doing well you drunkard. Your friend Hoshiguma-san has been battering me for the past 3 days asking me to let her through and about where you were, and I can't take it anymore; I want to quit. She literally comes in screaming your name-"

"SHIZUMU!"

"Oh, there she is. If you won't mind, please don't cross the bridge just yet. Or throw one of those shitty blessing talismans of yours at her, I am unable to care." She started muttering something about oni, but Shuten couldn't manage to hear anything. 'Should I give up and throw seals at both of them? I know I have to give Mizuhashi one, seeing how irritated she sounds, but Yuugi's worried about me. Would rejecting her kindness really be fair?'

Hoshiguma started tearing the bridge apart.

The answer was yes. (Your life's in danger here, buddy.) If he wanted to live to see another day, he needed to stop Yuugi for now. He looked through his sleeves and found only two Calm Mind blessings, as his Emotional Exorcism ones had run out while fighting Metis. He carefully observed for a chance to aim and shoot the talismans onto their foreheads.

Parsee jumped on the stable parts of the bridge, which had been filled with holes. It was on its last legs. Yuugi kicked through one of the support pillars, and half of the bridge collapsed with it. 'Dammit! That's going to come out of my paycheck!'

Yuugi jumped up to grab Shizumu and drag him home.

"No."

The talisman flashed in a burst of light. A clear blue mist entered Hoshiguma's head. She dropped down on the floor, very worn out. Shuten poked her with a stick from what was left of the bridge. "She's out like a light. I'm jealous."

"Don't tell me. I'm already done with today, and sleeping sounds better than dealing with this. First some jackass tried to grope me on my way to my post here, then I start feeling like shit because it's a slow day, and next thing I know, you come out of an alcohol induced coma and along with that comes your friend to wreck my bridge! Good thing I'd taken an insurance policy as soon as she started breaking parts of the bridge while asking for you, or else my savings would get murdered by Satori-san after hearing what happened to the bridge. It's the first time someone has done this much damage to it. But... you don't know how lucky you are to have someone who'll worry this much about you, despite the results of it. I can tell you, she's a pretty valuable girl. You should get together, even."

"You do have a point, but I'm not interested in getting babied by this woman. Well, sorry for bringing you trouble. I'll invite you over for drinks some day. Home brewed, I promise." Shuten hung Hoshiguma on his shoulder like a sack of rice. "Pardon me, but I'll have to leave. Oh, yes, would you like a blessing? You look worn out by all this. On the house, of course. I have to pay you back for the bridge somehow." Parsee stopped to think and scratched at her blonde hair lightly. "I refuse. I need something to keep me down on the ground today, and not everything can be rainbows and sunshine."

"That's fine. Well, I'll see you next time I come to pass through, I suppose." Parsee waved at Shizumu and headed for the Earth Spirit Palace to inform them of her bridge. They were not happy. She wasn't either. Shizumu dropped down to the Capital, Yuugi in tow. The smell of the yakiniku stalls reminded him of that strange girl.

'What might have her and Hakurei-san been talking about?' He kept himself busy thinking about the previous day's events and finally found his shrine. There were a few people hanging about, but not too many. He had two horns on display as not to call too much attention to himself. One of them recognized him; an oni who looked like he was in his twilight years. Of course, most oni die from either alcohol poisoning or in battle much before they reach the latter part of their lives, so he was bound to be a wiser and calmer man than most. He called out to Shizumu.

"Young one! You are this god's shrine maiden, is it true?"

"...yes?" 'I regret everything that I did the other day.'

"I must ask, what is the name of your god? I am interested in hearing about them."

'Oh, right, I forgot to put up the plate back up. Of course I did.' He looked around to find no trace of the tablet. 'Oops.'

After sighing and pinching in between his eyes, he replied. "He is Shuten-Douji." All eyes were on him. Sweat dripped down his forehead while a false smile covered his panic.

'I shouldn't have said that. I should NOT have said that' One of the worst and greatest of oni was now a Shinto god. Well, that was bound to cause shock. A crowd formed around he shrine as people stopped to see what had happened.

"He became a god?" a well dressed oni asked. "A hundred years ago, from what I remember..." replied Shuten.

He felt the cold sweat flow on his skin. The silence that had formed around him made him very uncomfortable. Until... "Aye, he's back!" an oni raised a big gourd into the air. "Yeah, he is!" another raised their dish. "Wooh!" many more followed after. "He's back!" the entire mass cheered. "He got into godhood!" one announced.

Loud chattering was heard from all sides of the street. Noise overwhelmed any kind of sound. People were flocking into the shrine. A party was being held on the grounds.

Tables were being brought in from many locales and set up next to the shrine. Gourds and bottles flew above the heads of oni. Food stall stands were being set up throughout the shrine's streets.

Shuten got lifted up into the air, in the same shrine maiden outfit he'd fitted himself into a couple days ago. People cheered for the return of a king; with alcohol and a huge banquet.

He was being swept by the waves of people, who carried him around the entirety of Former Hell.

"Good grief, what's with all the noise?" Yuugi had woken up.

"A party, missus! Yer man's come back from the dead!" A big oni in a tiger pelt loincloth told her exactly what she already knew, with unnecessary and mistaken details.

She punched him in the stomach for "no reason at all". A brawl started immediately after. A proper oni party couldn't start without a massive fight, after all. Fists were being thrown like pies. Tables and chairs flew into everyone's heads in the area. Walls broke, oni bled, and sake was being shoved into everyone's throats, no matter if they were man, woman or god. It was all in fun, despite the danger it posed.

"All be blessed by our biggest bro!" an oni took up stand on a stage and screamed at the top of his lungs. An oni band threw him off the stage and started playing taiko drums at wrist-break speeds and with legendary coordination. Raiko is impressed. Shuten looked around to find the elder oni. There was something about him that stuck out to him.

He felt someone's palm under his back, and it shot him upwards into the ceiling of the Underground. He spotted a familiar silver haired man with a hat looking at him while he soared through the ashy and thick air of the Former Capital.

Time slowed down as the waves of people washed under him. He dove down into a three point landing, clearing out a circle around him. He looked forwards with a toothy smile.

"KUMA!" Shuten called out.

The oni in the black suit removed his hat, revealing his three horns. A shit-eating grin, sharp eyes with a glint and an honest man's heart. He looked on forwards, fedora on his chest.

"The one and only, Aniki. Basking in glory, huh? Let me in on some of it, won't you? Hahahahah!" a hearty and loud laughter unfitting his appearance congratulated Shuten's success.

"You're finally here, ay? Let's get you all primed up for your debut, then." Kuma joked. He spun his hat on his finger. "But it seems you're already making waves in the people, right? Well then, I'll accompany you myself to Yuugi's. These streets are getting messy, after all. Don't want you getting into any trouble." He grabbed his hand and led him to Yuugi's home, humming under the sounds of chaos and partying.

+Faith!

Update: I may or may not slow down my upload schedule. Writing's chipping away quite a bit at my time, and I have homework to do. Expect a chapter every other day or a bit later. Please wait warmly. I will make sure I keep on writing Divine and Horned Oni, though.