This is the last chapter I'll be posting in New Zealand.

(Own up: how many of you had a heart attack when you saw 'This is the last chapter...'?)

Anyway, tomorrow I'm flying all day and I'll be in Australia tomorrow night. Because they're two hours behind, this means my upload times probably will change, but nothing dramatic. And I spent today saying goodbye to people, which sucked. But we've just been out to dinner and it was honestly the best meal I've ever had and the wine was amazing and I'm dead to the world. So goodnight everybody, and I'll speak to you all from Australia tomorrow :)

From Lolasatsuma: After the GAP Attack, Klaine are in their local coffee shop and Blaine is moaning about the fact that he made his love with Jerimiah[sic] up in his head. Kurt confesses that he thought that Blaine was going to sing with him and when Blaine doesn't believe him, he goes in for a kiss.

WARNING: This is OOC Blaine and ANGST, but it does get resolved. But seriously, intentionally written OOC Blaine, okay?

Insecure

"I just can't believe I made it all up in my head."

Kurt sighed. "Okay, can I ask you something? Because we've always been completely honest with each other. You and I - we hang out... we sing flirty duets together.. you know my coffee order... Was I supposed to think that was nothing?"

Blaine lifted his head and Kurt was astonished to see a glimmer of unshed tears in his eyes. "What do you mean?"

Now or never, Kurt.

"I thought the guy you wanted to ask out on Valentines Day was me."

He wasn't sure what he had expected to see from his declaration. He hoped that Blaine wouldn't reject him too badly, though he'd probably chuck out some line about how Kurt's friendship meant too much to him to hurt right now.

Instead, he saw pure shock written across Blaine's face. "No... you can't be serious."

Kurt's brow furrowed. "I am. Why is that so hard to believe?"

"Because you're Kurt Hummel!" Blaine clapped a hand over his mouth but seemed unable to stop the torrent of words that came flooding out a second later. "You're so confident and unique and independent and there's no way you'd like someone like .."

"Like what, Blaine?"

"Like me." Blaine ducked his head. "I'd always hoped but I knew nothing would come of it, which is why I went after Jeremiah. I know you're just joking, but please stop."

Kurt was dumbfounded. Does Blaine really think so little of himself?

"Blaine. Look at me."

Blaine shook his head, refusing to look up. "I - I can't."

"Why not?" Kurt couldn't understand why his confident friend had suddenly changed.

"Because I'm usually so good at putting on the brave face but I can't do it this time." Blaine finally lifted his head a little and Kurt could see the raw emotion shining in his eyes. "I hide behind a mask all the time, Kurt, and everybody thinks I'm totally in control. But I'm not, I'm scared."

Kurt took his arm and steered him to a table. "Blaine, you don't have to be in control all the time. Tell me what scares you."

Blaine sighed and looked up to meet Kurt's eyes. "I'm scared of actually showing my emotions. At my last school, I got beaten up any time I tried. I know I'm safe at Dalton but I've gotten to the point where it just scares me too much to even try."

Kurt reached out and gently put a hand on Blaine's. "Then share something with me. Tell me why you thought I was joking and why you didn't want me to be joking."

Kurt had never imagined that when he and Blaine finally confessed their feelings for each other - and he had imagined it many times in many different scenarios - it would be him encouraging Blaine to talk about his feelings.

Blaine took a deep breath, then blurted it out. "I like you. I really do, I - I just - I've never had a boyfriend, you know? And I'd never want to do anything to hurt you and I'm scared of that. I'm scared I'll say or do the wrong thing and screw it all up and you'll leave me and -"

Kurt cut off Blaine's tirade the only way he could. Leaning across the table, Kurt kissed him. Blaine spluttered slightly against his mouth for a second before relaxing into the touch.

Aware of where they were, Kurt pulled away after a few seconds. "Trust me," he urged, knowing Blaine was about three seconds from running out. "Let me in. We can learn this together, okay?"

Blaine shook his head. "I can't do it, Kurt. I - I'm so sorry."

The chair flew back, and Blaine bolted. Kurt watched him go, feeling the tears fill up in his eyes, before sighing and pushing back his own chair.

Someday, Blaine, you'll realize that some things are worth letting in, Kurt thought to himself as he headed out of the Lima Bean, deciding a girls night was what he needed to feel better. He pulled out his phone, and called Mercedes.

And I've waited this long. I'm not giving up on you yet. But I'm not waiting forever.

Blaine grabbed another tissue, wiping at his eyes and forcing himself to stop crying. He had left the Lima Bean an hour earlier and the second he had gotten to his room, he had collapsed on his bed and cried his eyes out. And now he was exhausted, but his brain just wouldn't stop working.

So, think about it, Blaine. Why are you so upset?

Well, that was a no-brainer. He had just run out on Kurt after he had kissed him, telling him he was too scared to start a relationship with him. Of course he was going to be upset, especially since he knew he had probably just ruined his friendship with Kurt.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" he screamed into his pillow, before succumbing to his tears again.

A second later, his door burst open and someone entered hurriedly, kneeling next to him. "Blaine? What's going on?"

Blaine knew the tears were still pouring down his face as he croaked out, "It's nothing, Wes. Just go, please."

"Like hell it's nothing, and I'm not leaving you like this. Sit up."

Blaine groaned, but obediently sat up, wiping his face. Wes sat next to him, offering him another tissue and waiting until he had stopped crying again before speaking. "Now, tell me what happened."

He sighed before repeating the events of the afternoon as quickly as possible to Wes, trying to be as objective as possible so he wouldn't start bawling again. Wes heard him out silently, only raising an eyebrow when Blaine told him about the kiss. At the end, there was a few seconds of silence, before Wes asked the all important question. "So, if you like him, why won't you date him?"

"I can't hurt him, Wes, I -"

Wes shook his head. "No, Blaine. It's not about hurting Kurt, it's about hurting you. For so long, you've had your walls up because you thought someone was going to hurt you. You've liked Kurt for ages, I know that even if you don't. And here he is, offering himself to you, knowing that you're insecure and you're wearing masks and wanting you anyway, and you're going to let that go?" Wes paused for a second. "Blaine, how would you feel if Kurt walked out of your life?"

Blaine felt his heart drop. "It'd kill me, Wes."

"So why did you walk out of his?"

And that was when it hit him, with the force of a ton of bricks. You just lost Kurt because you were too afraid to have him.

Blaine bit his lip, trying not to cry again. All he wanted was for Wes to get out so he could wallow in self-pity and realize just how stupid he'd been and how much he had given up -

"You can fix it, you know?"

His head snapped up. "How?"

Wes sighed. "Kurt won't just walk away, Blaine. He's waited this long for you, I don't think he'll be giving up on you yet. So find out where he is and go talk to him."

"Find out where he is? Isn't he here?" But Blaine knew that of course Kurt wouldn't come back. He stood, grabbing his keys and ignoring whatever Wes called after him as he ran down the stairs to his car. As he pulled out of the parking lot, probably driving far too fast, he ran through the list of where Kurt would go and got an answer straight away. Mercedes.

Blaine floored it.

"Kurt, honey, it'll be okay."

Kurt sniffed, wiping at his eyes and leaning into Mercedes as she wrapped an arm around him. "I just feel terrible for him, 'Cedes. I can live with rejection because I've been getting it all my life. But he's living with this fear and he can't break through it, even for his own happiness."

Mercedes sighed. "I know you, Kurt. You're going to wait for him, aren't you?"

"What else can I do? I love him," Kurt's voice broke a little at that, "and he cares about me too, possibly even loves me back. He helped me work through my fears with Karofsky, I need to help him with this. I just need to wait until he lets me -"

There was a loud banging at the door and both Mercedes and Kurt jumped. Mercedes got up and went downstairs to answer the door, her parents being out for the evening. Kurt sighed and settled back into the bed, feeling fresh tears spring to his eyes. As much as he said he was only feeling sorry for Blaine, truth was he felt pretty bad for himself too. Considering he had just kissed Blaine and been rejected...

"Kurt!"

No way...

Kurt jumped up, his heart in his throat. Mercedes sounded worried, excited and wary all in one, and Kurt knew who was at the door. He took the stairs two at a time, skidding into the foyer and stopping next to Mercedes, staring at the doorway.

Blaine was standing in the doorway, his eyes red and tear marks down his face. He was trembling, and all Kurt wanted to do was pull him into his arms and never let him go, but he knew that Blaine needed to speak, for both of their sakes.

Mercedes slipped into the kitchen and Kurt led Blaine into the living room, sitting opposite him and waiting. There was silence, then Blaine began to speak. "Kurt, I'm an idiot. I was willing to give up one of the - the best things that ever h-happened to me." Blaine stopped, taking a few deep breaths and trying to keep his voice steady. "Because I was afraid. And that's not fair, to either of us, but especially not to you."

Another silence, and the first tears spilled down Blaine's cheeks. "I love you, Kurt. I don't know how long I have, but I do. And I can't let my fears get in the way of that. And I don't know whether you still want me after the way I acted, but all I know is that I do want you. No matter what it takes, no matter how scared I am that I'll screw it up and you'll hate me, or we'll break up and never be friends again. I want to risk it, for you. Only for you, Kurt."

His own tears were slipping down as Kurt reached out, taking Blaine's hands. "I'll ask it again," he murmured. "Trust me. Let me in. We can learn it together, okay?"

Blaine smiled through his tears. "Okay."

Kurt leant in and kissed him again, and this time Blaine responded, kissing back with a hesitance that slowly disappeared. And Kurt knew in that moment that Blaine had given him his heart.

Okay, this was initially written that it ended just after the kiss, when Kurt told Blaine to let him in, I had Blaine agreeing and that was that. I looked at it and went 'no, that sucks.' So I then had it ending with Kurt thinking about waiting for Blaine. Then I wrote an end authors note saying "For anybody who's feeling miserable right now..." and made up a scenario where it got resolved. Then I went 'hold it, what am I doing this for? Why don't I just write that?'

So that's what I got.