~~Sidney~~
Before anyone was up, I rushed to the cove. A part of me regretted agreeing to teaching her how to fight. I knew, somehow it was bound to backfire on me. But another part of me looked forward to seeing her, to being close to her, to potentially being allowed to touch her even in the slightest way. With Eliza back in London and a start to her releasing me from the engagement, made me hopeful for a future with Charlotte. The only thing standing in my way was the debt Tom had incurred.
I arrived at the cove well before the sun came up. Perhaps in my anxious desire to see her, I came too early. I waited and watched the sun come up. I saw a group of deer run across the clifftops. I watched the waves crash against the shore and then retreat back into the ocean over and over again. I got impatient and started to pace the beach. I started to wonder if she was going to show at all.
Right when I was about to face defeat, I heard footsteps coming up behind me. I turned and saw Charlotte coming down the embankment with Alison following close behind. I had a moment of disappointment to see Alison but decided it would be best not to show my dissatisfaction to them. I forced a smile and walked over to meet them halfway.
"Good morning," I said bowing my head towards them.
"Mr. Parker," Charlotte greeted. Instead of glaring like she usually did, Alison seemed to be studying me. What she was looking for, I do not know. "I thought it best since Alison and I are both at the building site most days, she should learn some protection skills as well."
I nodded and looked down at my feet to once again hide my disappointment. "I couldn't agree more," I said. "You can both practice on each other."
I removed my jacket and placed it on a nearby rock while both girls removed their bonnets and gloves.
"You mentioned yesterday you wanted to know how to throw a punch. I'll teach you the basics of how to hit someone without hurting yourself too badly and perhaps a few other techniques if you're ever attacked by a scoundrel."
"I think it would be most helpful," Charlotte said.
"I suppose the first thing you should know is always try to hit them with the element of surprise. You'll have much more impact if they aren't expecting you to hit them." Both girls nodded their heads in understanding. "Let's start with your stance. You'll need to spread your feet apart. Line them up with your shoulders." Both of them followed my instructions, albeit a little nervously. Raise your hands to chest level and make a fist. Keep your elbows in close to your body and turn to your side just slightly." I instinctively reached out and corrected Charlotte's arms, knowing full well I shouldn't have, and Alison was probably going to shoot daggers at me. Charlotte didn't shy away from my touch and moved her elbow closer to her body. To my surprise Alison didn't glare at me, but just seemed to be studying me again. "Now visualize something out in front of you and swing your fist towards it."
Nervously, they both swung their arms out slowly and far too wide. They looked rather silly doing so. I rolled my eyes and started again. "Let's try something different. Which one of you want to go first?"
"I suppose I will," Charlotte said.
"Alright," I said. "Miss Heywood stand facing your sister and put your hands up by your face palms facing out." I directed Alison. "Now Charlotte… Miss Heywood, you'll face her and try to hit her hands with sharp, quick jabs of your fist. Watch what I do." I got in my stance and showed them a couple quick punches into the air just to give them an idea of what I meant. Charlotte nodded her head and got into position. With a deep breath she punched her sister's hand. Alison sort of stumbled backwards and her eyes went wild.
"I wasn't expecting such force," Alison said loudly. I hid my smirk but was quite proud of Charlotte.
"Try it again," I said. She did as I instructed and punched Alison's hands over and over. Alison had gotten wise to the force coming from Charlotte and made it a mission not to let her cause another stumble. I watched with a pleased expression as Charlotte practiced and the look of determination was on her face.
"Am I going to get to practice, or am I just the punching bag?" Alison asked.
I cleared my throat and shook away the pleasurable thoughts going on inside of me. "Of course. Why don't you both switch?" Now Alison punched at Charlotte's hands. Alison wasn't quite as forceful and almost seemed a little indifferent to the lesson. They both took turns practicing and listened to my corrections.
"You both did well," I said after they had practiced for quite some time. Beads of perspiration lined their hairlines and their cheeks were bright red with heat. "Shall we meet tomorrow morning for more lessons?"
"What else do you need to teach us?" Alison asked.
I scoffed at the question. "There's so much more that can be taught. I've barely shown you anything?"
"For me, I'd like to learn more. I want to know we are both safe when at the building site or anywhere else, for that matter," Charlotte said. There was an exchange of looks between Alison and Charlotte. They agreed to meet me the next day and started to gather their things to leave.
"Miss Heywood," I called as they began to walk away. Both of them turned. "Charlotte. May I have a word with you for a moment?"
They shared another look. Alison said she'd wait for Charlotte at the top of the cliff.
"What is it?" she asked.
"I wanted to ask about the Terrace. Is it alright if I join in the building today?"
"Of course," she said. Her expression was of confusion. I felt like I needed to explain my question more.
"I know we talked yesterday, and you met with me today, but I wanted to be sure you didn't feel awkward around me. I don't want to make you uncomfortable."
"I'm perfectly well, I assure you," she said. "I've decided to put things in the past and move on. You and I can be friends, or if you'd rather, business acquaintances."
I didn't like hearing she had moved on. Moved on to what? I faked a smile. "I like us being friends."
"Very well," she said. "I will see you at the Terrace today. Good day, Mr. Parker."
"If we're going to be friends, do you think we could address each other on more friendly terms?" I asked with a hopeful expression.
"I think, for everyone's sake, Mr. Parker will do," she said. She burst my bubble once again and I let out a defeated sigh. I was hopeful I'd hear my name leave her lips just once.
"Then, good day, Miss Heywood," I said sadly.
She nodded her head and joined Alison at the top of the cliff. I walked the beach back towards town and thought about the weight of the debt on my shoulders and the pain Charlotte's rejection caused. I wasn't meant for this type of heartache. I thought all those years ago I had a broken heart, this was far worse. I'd never felt pain like losing Charlotte. She had taken every part of me that was broken and put it back together. In my stupidity, I shattered it again. Now I desperately wanted to fix it and make her see I could be that man once again. She just needed to allow me to show her what I could do.
Yet in my next thought I questioned whether I should let her go. Should I allow her to find happiness somewhere else? Perhaps I wasn't right for her. Perhaps she deserved more than I could ever offer her. I should keep my distance and let her to move on.
The constant battle inside of me was unbearable. Neither scenario seemed plausible.
When I returned to town, I walked into Trafalgar house to find Mary and the children as well as Diana and Arthur sitting in the dining room for breakfast. I greeted them cheerfully before sitting down at the table.
"Where have you been?" Diana asked.
"Down on the beach," I answered.
"You look rather cheerful today," Arthur observed. "Anything particular bring out those sentiments?"
I smiled and distracted myself with filling a plate with food. "It's a lovely day, that is all," I answered.
Everyone seemed to be staring trying to gage my mood. I needed to change the subject.
"Any word from Tom?" I asked.
"Nothing yet," Mary answered. "I've requested any mail sent to the London house be sent here. If only he had told me where he was going before he left."
"No use dwelling on it," I said. "I have a plan. I may need to leave Sanditon for a couple days. I'm hopeful when I return, I'll have good news."
"You said that the last time," Diana said. "Now we are all on the verge of a scandal."
"Diana," Mary scolded. "Not in front of the children, please." I looked around at their innocent faces and smiled at little Henry who emulated me in many ways.
"I'm hopeful this time will be more successful."
"What's your plan?" Arthur asked with a mouthful of food.
"I'll reveal in due time," I answered. "Are you joining the workforce at Waterloo Terrace today?"
"My body is still aching from yesterday's work. Perhaps I should take today off. I don't want to overdo it," he said.
"Indeed, you should," Diana coddled. "You are not built for hard labor, dear brother. I insist you stay in bed all day to rest." He patted her hand on his arm and nodded his head in agreement.
I rolled my eyes. "Must be hard work to take notes and deliver messages," I teased.
Arthur gave me a knowing look. I'd only know that information if Charlotte had told me. "Did you happen to see Miss Heywood down on the beach this morning?" he asked with a grin on his face.
I gave him a crooked smile and narrowed my eyes in a playful gesture. "I need to get to work," I said standing from my chair and heading towards the door.
"On second thought, I think I'll see if Miss Charlotte needs my assistance today," Arthur added, standing from his chair and following me towards the door.
"But Arthur," Diana whined. "You'll catch your death out there. I insist you stay home."
"Interesting how you worry about Arthur catching his death, yet haven't said one word about my safety," I observed.
"You aren't as delicate as Arthur. He nearly died and was left fragile after his illness," she excused.
"I was sick with the same illness, Diana. Or do you not remember?" I said. "Arthur is perfectly well without your constant nursing. I'll take good care of our little brother."
Arthur and I left and walked down the street towards the building site. "You don't always need to be so hard on Diana, you know. She has no one to look after," Arthur said.
"So, you let her mother you?" I asked.
"She means well. Besides, I don't mind the constant attention," he said with a giggle.
I stopped and turned towards him. "You'll never be a man if you don't break free from her."
"I have my own place. I hired a maid. I have broken free," he said. "I've even been considering marriage, which is something I never thought I would let leave my lips."
I smirked. "Marriage to whom?"
"Not something you need to worry yourself with today," he said walking away.
I caught up and walked in pace with him.
"If I was to consider marriage," he began. "How do you think it would look if I married someone out of my class?"
The sudden thoughts of him marrying Georgiana filled my thoughts. Perhaps if he did, we could use her fortune to pay off Tom's debts. I told myself I would never use her that way, but I was getting desperate. I could find a way to pay them back in time. If Sanditon became prosperous, they'd see money coming in that way too. I allowed myself to get my hopes up for the slightest of moments. "I think if you love someone, class shouldn't play any part in it," I said. "Nor should color of skin or background."
"You would approve if I asked my maid to become my wife, then?" he asked.
I stopped and had a moment of confusion. "Your maid?" I asked. "I thought you were talking about Georgiana?"
He laughed. "Georgiana and I aren't suitable," he said.
"Why not?" I felt defeated.
"We're great friends. I enjoy her company, but she has never made my heart flutter and I'm sure I've never done that for her. When I'm with my maid, I can't help but picture a future with her. Is it wrong for me to imagine such things?"
I thought about it for a moment and tried to wrap my head around what he was telling me. It very well could be one of the most intimate moments between brothers we've ever had. He confided something personal and open hoping for my approval in his choice. "I suppose you don't always get to choose who you fall in love with. Whoever that may be, deserves a great man."
He smiled jubilantly. "I think I will tell her how I feel tonight. I'd like her to come to Trafalgar House sometime for everyone to meet," he suggested.
"I'll talk to Mary about the idea," I offered patting him on the back.
We walked the rest of the way to Waterloo Terrace silently. I was still trying to come to terms with what he had told me. All this time I thought he fancied Georgiana and I'd have to allow him to marry her. How was I so wrong?
We arrived at the site and walked over to Charlotte who was already there directing men on where to go and what to do.
"Good morning, Miss Heywood," Arthur greeted. She turned towards us and the smile disappeared from her lips.
"Mr. Parker," she said greeting Arthur first.
"Miss Heywood," I said with a smile. "Nice to see you this morning."
"You as well, Mr. Parker," she said with a slight grin.
"I have a little business to attend to before I can get started. I'll be back in a while," I said.
"Alright," she said. "Arthur, would you mind writing some measurements down for me?" she asked of Arthur as I began to walk away.
I hadn't checked on the gazebo I had asked to be built for a few days, and I wanted to check on the progress. I was hopeful the building was almost complete so I could commission the men who were specifically hired for the job could then join us on the other building projects.
As I reached the river, I saw an almost complete gazebo taking shape. It was perfect in every way. I couldn't wait for Charlotte to see it and for her to present a staged show while the Prince Regent was here.
"What do you think, Mr. Parker," Jacob Finnegan asked. I'd only spoken to the man once when he first arrived, but he was a fine builder who knew his wood well.
"Looks amazing," I said. "I'm eager to reveal it to the town."
"We should be done in just a day or two."
"Wonderful! If you don't have any other pressing jobs, we could easily use all the help we can get at the Waterloo Terrace in town. If you and your men are up to it, you'll be paid handsomely."
"I think we can manage a few more days," he accepted. I shook his hand in agreement and let him get back to work. I walked back into town excited to be able to reveal the gazebo to Charlotte. Perhaps, if my plan was to work, I could finally ask her to marry me in the gazebo. Then I saw something that stopped me in my tracks and nearly knocked the breath out of me.
Mr. Stringer with Charlotte.
NOTES: The next chapter is done, I just need to fine tune it before posting. We are nearing some really good stuff.