~~Charlotte~~

I didn't appreciate Lady Denham telling me to wait in the carriage. I wasn't a child and she had no right to treat me like one. I impatiently waited for her to return knowing full well she was talking to Sidney about the proposition he offered her. I hoped she was willing to work with him. I wanted all this conflict over the debt to be behind us.

When Lady Denham got in the carriage, she seemed pleased with herself. "Did you talk to Mr. Parker about the debt?" I asked.

She looked shocked as if she didn't think I knew Sidney had asked to work with her on the terms of paying off the debt. "I did."

"And did you agree? Will you work with Mr. Parker?" I asked, hopeful.

"Mr. Parker and I have come to an understanding as far as the debt goes," she clarified.

"Oh, that's wonderful," I said, feeling relieved. "The entire Parker family has been concerned with what will happen."

"Yes, well, I don't think any of the Parker family have very good business sense. Tom has utterly disappeared and left his debts to be taken care of by his cad of a brother in his absence. We all know the brother Arthur is of no use and the sister is outlandishly ridiculous. Even Mary is senseless at times. How she didn't know what was going on with Tom is beyond me."

Her words hurt. I knew I wasn't a true member of the family, but I loved all of them as if they were my family. How could she say such horrible things about them? "Lady Denham, they aren't anything like what you describe. Tom is off trying to find a way to pay the debt himself, Sidney is doing everything he can to take care of his family as well as help with the rebuild. Even Arthur has been helping at the building. Please don't say such hurtful things about them."

"Charlotte, it's time you put some distance between you and the Parker family," she ordered. "That family has betrayed me for the last time. I won't sit back and watch them betray you once again. I forbid you from seeing them anymore."

"You will not!" I said angrily. "You can't tell me who to spend my time with. I love all of them."

"Preposterous! How can you love a family that has deceived you and everyone else in this town at every turn?"

"I think we have a difference of opinion on who the Parkers are," I said. "They have been nothing but kind and welcoming to me and Alison. I consider them family. Nothing you or anyone else says is going to change my mind."

"It's time for you to see the world for what it is. They are only using you. And that Sidney Parker dangling you from a string. It's quite pathetic."

I was beyond angry and couldn't hold my tongue any longer. "I'm quite certain the same could be said about you. You practically ordered me to come back to Sanditon in your letter. You put me in charge of a building site I truly knew very little about, but expected me to do a good job. You've let both Alison and I know we are under your control and to do as you say regardless of what our own wishes or thoughts are. We have indulged you and done practically everything you have asked of us, yet you accuse the Parker family of using us. What about you?"

"Me? Me?" she spat angrily. "I've done nothing but bring out your potential. I knew from the moment I met you there was something special. The Parkers just bring you down. If you can't see that, perhaps you aren't as smart as I thought you were."

Even though I was still angry, I didn't say anything more. It seemed pointless to even try to explain myself to her. The one thing I did know, undoubtedly, she was not going to stop me from seeing the Parker family. They were a part of my life just as much as she was.

When we arrived back to the house, I bolted from the carriage before the footman even had a chance to open the door. I ran through the front door and straight up to my room and slammed the door behind me. I paced the floor angrily and had to hold back the urge to scream. Alison slowly opened the door and peaked in. I stopped pacing and stared at her. Tears filled my eyes. She shut the door and quickly ran to me letting me fall into her arms to cry.

"What happened?" she asked as I started to calm down.

"She's forbidden me from seeing the Parker family," I said. "She has no right to do so. She said some horrible things about them and I'm angry with her."

"She's a difficult woman. You told me that from the beginning. Don't let her get to you," Alison comforted. I took a deep breath and truly listened to what Alison was saying. I shouldn't be letting what she said bother me so much. She wasn't my mother more so no right to tell me what to do. I could do as I pleased and if she didn't like it, she could ask me to leave. I'd be happy to do so. Even if Trafalgar House was filled, I'm sure Mary would find a place for me; and Alison if Lady Denham wished her to go too.

With my own grief, I forgot about what Sidney had told me about Mr. Crowe and Alison. I gasped and pulled away from her. "I shouldn't be going on like this when you probably have so much to tell me," I said. "Come. Sit on the bed with me and tell me everything."

I pulled her over to the bed and we sat facing each other. I held her hands in mine and smiled, encouraging her to tell me everything.

"I assume Mr. Parker told you Mr. Crowe asked me to marry him?" she began looking down bashfully.

"Yes, he did. What happened? Did you accept?"

"It was all so sudden, Charlotte. I don't even know what to think. There are so many thoughts going on in my mind. At first, I thought he was teasing me like he does sometimes. I said no, of course. Then shortly after you left with Mrs. Stringer and the children, he showed up at the picnic and we went for a walk and had a lovely conversation. It's the first time I truly felt like I got to see who he really is. He was vulnerable, and gentle, and just remarkable in every way. I can't stop thinking about our conversation. I think I've told him I accept his proposal. He's planning to escort us back to Willingden for George's wedding and has indicated he plans to talk to father."

I couldn't help but feel overwhelmingly happy for my sister. She seemed ecstatic with the potential of marrying Mr. Crowe. "I don't know if it's possible to be more pleased than I am right now. It's hard to believe my little sister is going to be married. I truly believe Mr. Crowe will be a good husband for you. He is a completely different man when he's with you."

"Lady Denham wants to take credit for our union and has talked of little more than his income and how I'll be well taken care of financially. I tried to tell her I didn't care about his fortune, but she wouldn't listen."

"I'm beginning to see how little she cares about anything but money," I said. "It's rather sad. Was she never happy in either of her marriages?"

"I don't think she was. I feel bad for her."

"Me too." I had a moment of understanding for Lady Denham. She had lived a very jaded life and spent most of it focused on improving her status in society. If I took any knowledge from Lady Denham, it was to live a different life. I admired her strength and independence. But I didn't agree with her opinions on love or on the Parker family. She wouldn't convince me differently.

Alison continued to tell me about the conversation she had with Mr. Crowe and even told me he kissed her. We both gushed about our first kisses and how special they were in their own way. With every word Alison spoke of Mr. Crowe only made me admire and appreciate him more. I couldn't wait until I was given an opportunity to speak to him and tell him how happy he's made my sister.

In the morning, I didn't want to see Lady Denham. I was quite certain if I was in the same room as her, I would explode with anger again. I left early in the morning before anyone was awake and spent the morning at the cove reading. I think a part of me was hoping Sidney would appear so I could see him in secret. Perhaps talk to him about what happened and get his perspective on what to do about Lady Denham. He never showed, though. I didn't return to the house and instead walked to the church, meeting Alison and Lady Denham there for the service. I noticed Sidney was not there with his family, nor were Lord and Lady Babington. After church was over, I returned to the cove and read another book, as reading was my only solace to prevent me from going mad. I didn't return to the house until late in the evening. I asked for food to be brought to my room even though I could hear Lady Denham, Alison and Mr. Crowe all in the dining room enjoying their meal. I was not in the mood to be sociable.

In the morning, I had planned to leave early enough so I wouldn't have to see Lady Denham, but she insisted Alison and I join her for breakfast. I had to remind myself to bite my tongue and remain indifferent. We were all silent throughout most of the breakfast, only the sound of our knives scraping the plates filled the room.

"Charlotte," Lady Denham began, causing me to jump in my chair. "There's a Lord Moreland planning to visit Sanditon while The Prince Regent is here. He has one of the largest fortunes in all of England and well connected with the prince. He also has five sons, none of which are married. I've had many correspondences with him and spoken of both you and Miss Lambe. One son, in particular, is very fond of exotic women and would like to get to know Miss Lambe better. I'd like you to show some extra attention to this family of sons and talk to Georgiana about the potential match."

"Why me?"

"Excuse me?"

"Why not Alison or even you? Why not someone else entirely?"

"Alison is already engaged. She doesn't need to show any favoritism to the Moreland family," she explained.

"Are you trying to marry me off to one of these men?" I asked, shocked as the realization came to my mind.

"Well you have to marry someone. I'd like to see you married to a well-bred husband with a fine income. Particularly the eldest, as he will inherit the title when his father dies. Yet I know love is important to you, so I will let you choose which son you fancy more. All will be well financed," she added.

I jaw clenched and I had to look away for a moment while she talked. "What if I choose not to marry?" I asked. "What if I'd rather continue to build Sanditon into a fine town that all of England wishes to visit?"

She scoffed at my response. "Charlotte, you know that's not possible. Right now, you are given the opportunity to finish what Tom Parker started at my request. Without my financial backing you wouldn't be where you are. Now, back to the Moreland sons. The eldest is Isaac. He's twenty-eight and I'm told quite handsome. He is an avid hunter and enjoys the quieter things in life."

"Lady Denham, I don't care about his interests. I will be kind to the Moreland family as I'm kind to all, but I'm not looking for a husband, nor will I be accepting any proposal from anyone until I wish to marry. Please respect my wishes and stop trying to push a husband on me."

"Very well," she agreed with a tone of irritation. "I suspect you may change your mind when you meet the Moreland men."

"I doubt it."

"Charlotte, should we get going?" Alison interjected. I quickly stood and agreed we should be going.

During the day, I was so angry with Lady Denham that I couldn't focus on anything and Mr. Stringer had to step in and take charge on many occasions.

"Miss Heywood, Perhaps, you can take the rest of the day off," Mr. Stringer said. "You aren't yourself today. We can handle the day's tasks."

"I'll be fine," I said trying to ignore his suggestions. I tried to go about my business and ignore him.

"Charlotte, I'm going to insist. We don't need anymore accidents. Please take some time away."

I stared at him, challenging his request with my expression. I ultimately dropped the nails I had in my hand on the ground and stormed off giving in to his request.

I didn't quite have a direction of where I wanted to go. All I knew is I needed to talk to someone about my frustration with Lady Denham's meddling. Someone who understood how to handle her. Someone who had lived through it. Esther was the only person who might understand where I was at with her and give me some advice on how better to approach the situation.

~~Sidney~~

Shortly after my horrifying conversation with Lady Denham, I had to leave. I couldn't stay in Trafalgar House any longer. I couldn't be around my family members anymore. I knew they were trying to offer support, but I had grown to resent them. I didn't want to resent them, but I couldn't help the overwhelming feelings of anger at what Tom had gotten me into. Mary was an extension of Tom and Diana was just irritating and whiny. I couldn't take her any longer. I needed distance. I was reminded back when I thought my heart was broken because of Eliza and how I needed distance from them and went to Antigua to get away. They were all just a little overbearing at the time. Some space away did me good then, space away now would also be good.

I packed a bag with a few things and headed out into the night for Babington's place. I was let in and Babington could tell there was something wrong as soon as he saw me. I didn't wish to speak to him that first night and just asked for a place to stay for a while. He had a servant show me to a room and I had a restless night as I thought over everything Lady Denham had said. Even though I attempted to remedy the situation, I was practically back where I started. I was still stuck with Tom's debt, still indebted to Lady Denham, and most importantly without Charlotte.

In the morning, I was informed Esther had taken ill and Babbers was tending to her. I left the house so as not to bother them. There was only one place I thought to go. Like so many times before, the cove was occupied by Charlotte and at the moment, I couldn't face her. I kept my distance and walked along the beach instead even though it did little to help.

When I knew Charlotte was gone for church, I headed back to the cove and removed my clothing. I didn't care that the water was freezing. I needed to go for a swim and release some of the tension I had built up. Everything lately was overwhelming and breaking me. I just wanted one thing to be easy. One moment without someone demanding something of me.

I headed back to the Babington house after my swim and spent the rest of the day, once again, trying to find a way to come up with enough money to pay Lady Denham. Everything I looked at was a dead end. The only glimmer of hope was a potential business partnership back in Antigua with someone I knew well while I lived there before. The only problem with that was I'd be gone for quite some time. So much could happen in that time. I couldn't exactly ask Charlotte to wait for me as I was forbidden to do so by Lady Denham.

Come morning the next day, Esther was feeling slightly better. In the afternoon, I had a chance to talk to Babington and now Crowe, who had shown up unexpectedly, about my predicament with Lady Denham, my potential travel to Antigua, my fear Charlotte would marry another before I return, and my inability to ask her to wait for me.

"I think you have to go," Babington said. "Crowe and I will stick around and be sure Charlotte doesn't get too close to someone else. We can keep any cads away from her for you. Esther and Alison will help also, won't you, dear."

I looked towards Esther who had been listening to our entire conversation from a nearby lounge chair. She rolled her eyes and shook her head. "The male sex is the most infuriating creature on the planet!" she spat. Babington laughed and even Crowe snickered. I remained stoic while I watched her slowly get up from the chair and walk over to me. She stopped in front of me, looking like death. I worried she was going to pass out and I'd have to catch her since she slightly swayed back and forth in front of me. "Sidney, if you love the girl, tell her. Let her know your plan to go to Antigua and make her a promise to return."

"I can't. Lady Denham has forbidden me."

"When have you ever been one to follow rules?" she asked. "My aunt has forbidden you from asking Charlotte to wait for you. She has not forbidden you to tell her the truth and let her make up her own mind. If she truly loves you the way you love her, she will wait for you. Stop being an ass and be honest with her for once in your life. Tell her everything. My aunt won't have any control on what Charlotte chooses. If she tries, I imagine Charlotte will return to Willingden and wait for you there. But if you aren't honest with her, she's never going to have the opportunity to make the decision."

I stood there staring blankly at Esther. How was she so clever? She was right. I hadn't been honest with Charlotte; not completely. I'd kept so much from her, thinking I needed to fix everything before I could make her an offer. But if I was honest, Charlotte would have an opportunity to make up her own mind.

"What are you waiting for?" Babington asked with a grin. He walked up behind Esther and put his arm around her to help steady her.

"Right." I nodded my head and headed for the door with my coat and hat in hand. To my surprise, Charlotte was at the door looking upset and equally surprised to see me.

She breathed a sigh, then fell forward. I caught her before she hit the ground and called for Crowe and Babington to help me get her inside. We carried her to a chair and laid her down. She was still breathing, so she only passed out, but Esther insisted we get the doctor in town.

"I'll go," Crowe offered. He headed out on horseback to get there quicker while Babington got some water and a cool cloth. Her face was flushed, but she didn't have a fever. She looked exhausted.

"Charlotte?" I whispered as she started to come to. She hummed in response and tried to open her eyes but struggled. "Just rest."

"Why don't we try to get her to a bed," Esther suggested. I scooped her up in my arms and followed one of the servants to a room and laid her down in the bed. I refused to let go of her hand while we waited for the doctor. I didn't care if it was improper. It's not like it's the first time I'd broken the rules with her. I wasn't leaving her side. Esther pulled up a chair for me to sit in so I could be close.

When the doctor arrived, he tried to tell me to leave, but I refused. He questioned my presence with his expression but didn't push the subject. He looked her over and used all kinds of tools I didn't have a clue about. He didn't say a word while he examined her.

"Is she alright?" I asked irately.

He stopped the examination and glanced back over at me. "She's fine. Perhaps a little exhausted and maybe dehydrated. When she comes to, she needs to drink plenty of fluids. Has she had any strenuous activities lately?"

"She works at the building site practically every day," I answered.

"She's also been under a lot of pressure with the Prince Regent arriving and some other personal reasons as well," Alison, who now stood in the doorway of the room, answered. Crowe stood next to her. No doubt, he rushed to fetch her at the building site to bring her to her sister's side.

"That would explain it," Doctor Fuchs answered. "Let her sleep. Don't bother her, but if she does wake, try to get her to eat or drink something."

"We will, doctor. Thank you," Babington said.

Dr. Fuchs turned towards Babington and Esther and looked Esther up and down. "Perhaps I need to examine you as well?" he questioned.

"I'm fine," she assured. "Just with child."

Dr. Fuchs nodded his head. "I think it would be best if I have a look just to be sure. If you are struggling with sickness, I might have some remedy for it."

"She has been gravely ill, doctor," Babington said. "If you have anything to help, we will try it."

"This is all normal," Esther argued. "You don't need to fuss."

"Why don't we all leave the room," the doctor suggested. Everyone started to leave. I could hear the doctor talking more to Babington and Esther.

"Mr. Parker?" Alison questioned.

I glanced towards her. "I'm not leaving."

"The doctor said we weren't to bother her. She needs to rest," she argued.

"I won't disturb her. I just can't leave," I said. "Please allow me to stay." I looked at Alison begging her with my eyes to not make me leave. She nodded her head and sighed granting me permission to stay. Crowe never left her side and escorted her out of the room leaving us alone. I kissed Charlotte's knuckles and held onto her hand with both of mine and watched her, hoping, waiting, questioning everything.

At some point I must have fallen asleep with my head against the side of the bed and didn't wake until I felt her stir and try to pull her hand away from mine. I gripped onto her tighter, refusing to let go and sat up to look at her. Her eyes were open, but since it had grown dark outside, she struggled to see where she was. I leaned towards her so she could see it was me.

"Mr. Parker?" she asked, confused. "Where am I?"

"You're at the Babington home. You passed out as soon as you got through the door," I explained.

"Oh."

"How do you feel?" I asked. "The doctor said you were exhausted and needed sleep. I'm not sure how long you've been asleep, but it's probably been a few hours."

"I feel a little dizzy. Other than that, I'm fine," she explained, sitting up in the bed.

"Here, let me get you something to drink." I grabbed the glass of water next to me and handed it to her.

"Can I have my hand back so I can take a drink?" she asked looking down at our linked fingers.

"Right." I let go, feeling just a little embarrassed.

She drank the glass of water and handed it back to me. "I feel a little silly," she said hiding her head bashfully.

"Whatever for?" I asked.

"I fainted. I remember you opening the door but nothing after that. Did I fall into your arms?"

I chuckled. "Yes."

She groaned. "I always laugh when the woman faints into a man's arms in a book. It's so unbelievable. Now here I went and did it for real. I guess I am that frivolous girl you always thought I was."

I smiled and tilted my head to the side. "I'm just glad you fainted in my arms and not someone else's. And you're not frivolous. You're so much more than that."

"How is Esther?" she asked, changing the subject. "I haven't heard from her in quite a while. I have been very upset the last couple of days and needed someone other than my sister to talk to. Esther understands Lady Denham, so I came to see her. But I also wanted to check on how her pregnancy was going."

"She's been rather sick lately, as I've been told. Babington is a good fellow, though and taking care of her. While the doctor was here examining you, he also had a look at Esther."

"I'll have to talk with her and see for my own eyes how she's doing. I'm not sure I quite trust the doctor's opinion," she said.

I laughed. "Would you like me to get her?" I offered. "They are just in the next room. Crowe and Alison are here also."

"No," she responded. "I'll speak to them later."

"Do you want to rest again? Do you wish me to leave?" I asked.

"No. You can stay," she offered. I smiled at her offer and reached for her hand again. She willingly let me take it and I brushed a kiss across her knuckles.

"Why have you been upset lately?" I asked.

She sighed dramatically as if thinking on it made her anger return. "Lady Denham has forbidden me from spending time with the Parker family. I assume mostly with you. She doesn't trust your family anymore and thinks all of you have betrayed her and I'm going to get sucked into another betrayal."

"I'm also forbidden from seeing you," I answered. "Well, perhaps not forbidden, but I'm not to pursue you nor ask you to wait for me."

"Wait for you?" she questioned.

I sighed and dropped my head but held her hand tighter. It was time to come clean. "Charlotte, I attempted to pay Lady Denham about half of what Tom owed with the expectation I would continue to make installments. I thought it would work. I thought with her affections for you, she'd be willing to work with me knowing how much I care for you as well. I was wrong. She has asked me not to pursue you until the debt is paid in full and has every expectation by the time that is, you'll be happily married to someone else."

"I'm aware she's trying to find me a husband. She has five brothers coming for a visit and has offered for me to choose one. She is pushing for the eldest since he will someday have a title, of course."

My jaw clenched and I breathed out a little louder and faster than I should. I didn't like the thought of potential suitors.

"I told her I wasn't interested," Charlotte said. "I don't plan to marry anyone." I rubbed my thumb across her knuckles and focused in on our entwined fingers trying hard not to think about what she was saying. "Unless, of course, I'm marrying you."

My eyes jumped to hers and a grin formed across my face. "I thought you said you never wanted to marry me."

"I have a bad habit of jumping to conclusions; especially when it comes to you. I should have given you the opportunity to explain yourself. I should have known you'd never abandon your family."

"I want nothing more than to marry you, Charlotte. I love you more than you'll ever be able to understand. But I can't until the debt is paid. I've ultimately made myself a poor man with outrageous debts and I can't give you the life you deserve."

"It's alright," she said in a saddened tone. "We will figure something out. We always do."

I dropped my head again and brought her fingers to my lips, resting her hand against them. "I might have to leave Sanditon soon," I said.

"For London?" she asked.

"No," I answered, looking up at her eyes. "For Antigua. I have an opportunity with someone I used to know there. It's potential for a lot of money that I can pay off the debt with. I might be gone for a few years, maybe longer."

"I see," she said, looking away. Even in the dark room, I could still see the tears forming in her eyes. She rose her head and looked at me with a strong expression. "No matter. I'll wait."

"I can't ask you to wait for me," I said.

"You aren't asking," she replied. "I'm offering. I love you, Sidney. I can't imagine spending my life with anyone but you. I don't care how long I have to wait. I refuse to go through life with anyone else."

There was a moment of understanding and hope between us. Even though I knew I shouldn't, I leaned in and stole a gentle kiss. To my surprise, she leaned in again and kissed me harder and more passionately before pulling away and leaning back against the bed.

"Why is everything so easy with you? Yet so terrible difficult at the same time?" I asked. "Does that even make sense?"

She giggled then reached out and brushed her fingers across my cheek and jaw. "It's like the universe has two sides. One of them is pushing us together and the other is trying to pull us apart."

"Exactly," I answered, reaching with my other hand to brush a strand of hair away from her face.

"I refuse to let the latter win," she stated determinedly.

My chest filled with hope and possibility. I smiled at her and brushed my thumb against her cheek. "Nor will I."

NOTES: Hopefully everyone is left with a happy crumb. I probably won't be able to update for a while as I have a very busy week ahead and my house has sort of suffered for this obsession. I will be back next week with Lady Susan and the Prince Regent.