Izuku's head was spinning. I'm such an idiot! I'm such an idiot! Why would I do that?! Why would I just hand them the notebook and bolt?!
He'd never felt such intense dread outside of a villain situation in his life. Putting trust into two girls he barely knew? It wasn't like Kodai would go around sharing what she saw in there, but Reiko Yanagi might be different…he didn't know all that much about her. And what if Yanagi somehow convinced Kodai that him giving them the notebook meant something? Meant something that it hadn't?
It had been a few hours now; it was almost time for dinner. Lunch Rush was making more food in the school cafeteria for all the students on campus at the same time, which included all the 2A and 2B students. The cafeteria. A prime place for things to spread. I'm not going to be able to handle this. Not at all.
They were going to see. They were going to see all his notes on them and all his investigating and think that he was the biggest creep ever. What had he been thinking, going through with this idea? Had he even been thinking at all?
I just…really wanted to show her.
Izuku blushed. He couldn't afford to be ridiculous. An old one-two mental punch went through his head, just like it always had when he was first getting to know Uraraka: I don't have time for love with One for All, and no girl wants a worthless Deku like me anyway. The sentence in all its forms was so ingrained in him that it was almost like a gut reaction. A deference.
Right, so he didn't want Kodai to get the wrong idea. And every second that notebook was with her, she might be getting the wrong idea.
He took a step toward the doors, to possibly run back to the Class B dorm and get it back. But…oh no, what would their reactions be if he showed back up, demanding it? They would be weirded out at his sudden change of mind. Or they might laugh at him for it. Or they might be so disgusted with the notebook that they'd shove it into him and slam the door, never speaking to him again. Or…or…even if they LIKED the notebook, if he showed up now demanding it back, they'd just be disappointed!
Nope. Nope. Can't go tonight. I'm doomed no matter what I do.
It would be absolute torture, waiting until the morning. He suspected he wouldn't get a wink of sleep. Why is this bothering me so much?
No, Izuku, stupid, you're not allowed to question that after you got YOURSELF into this situation in the first place. Moron Deku.
"Midoriya?"
He looked up. It was Todoroki.
His friend smiled. "I thought we'd lost you."
"Ha…not this time…" Izuku chuckled weakly. Tsu, Uraraka, and Iida were waiting just beyond. He followed them out the door, and toward the cafeteria.
"It is very kind of Lunch Rush to make us all food during winter break!" said Iida. "We should make an effort to thank him personally."
"Yeah…" Uraraka hummed, rubbing her belly. "Especially since getting food for the dorm is so expensive, with twenty-one of us."
"I think he's gonna do it tomorrow night too, ribbit," Tsu put in. "That's what I heard from a third-year, anyway."
"Ooh, I know!" Uraraka said excitedly. "We could all make a thank-you card for Lunch Rush! Like, a big one with all our names on it! Class B's too!"
Izuku stiffened upon mention of Class B. Todoroki noticed. "Are you sure you're alright?" he asked in a deadpan expression.
"Fine," Izuku croaked.
Tsuyu looked back at him. "You're sounding a bit like me there, Midoriya-chan. Ribbit."
"I'm just hungry," he lied.
"Saaaaame," Uraraka drawled, pulling all attention back to her, to Izuku's relief. "I feel like I could eat a horse."
Todoroki's eyes widened in concern. "An entire horse?" he asked darkly, only for the two girls to laugh.
"It's a figure of speech, silly!" Uraraka said, poking him in the belly.
"Ow," Todoroki muttered, rubbing the spot and averting his eyes.
They walked into the cafeteria and joined the loud, chattering line. Izuku thought the cafeteria in general felt a little more crowded than normal…he supposed a lot of classes were missing people who'd gone home for winter break, although 2A and 2B were still full. However, even with those missing people, all the classes were in here at once, which never happened during school hours…they were always spread out over several lunch periods. It was also weird that the cafeteria windows showed darkness. He wasn't used to being here for dinner, and the slightly increased crowd level was furthering the unfamiliarity. He felt his palms begin to sweat as he pushed his tray along the metal ledge, picking up whatever food was left and robotically following his friends to their usual table.
Their table was unoccupied, but a third year class was sitting nearby, which was unusual. "Hey, it's the problem kids!" someone hooted. Izuku went pale, Iida frowned at them, but Uraraka just waved. "Take a picture, it'll last longer!" she called back, and all the boys sitting at that table laughed.
"You're amazing, Uraraka-san," Izuku sighed as the five of them sat down in sync, in their usual seats.
Uraraka had a piece of fish halfway to her mouth, but she paused and blushed. "Whatever do you mean by that, Deku-kun?"
Tsu, meanwhile, was watching him intently.
"The way you can respond to stuff like that so quickly…I mean, in those kinds of situations, I just…freeze up."
"Ah, Deku, it's no big deal." Uraraka waved a comforting hand and started to eat. "Having a snappy comeback doesn't mean anything in life if you're no good at other stuff, like money, or your job, or…y'know." She trailed off, chewing.
"But that sort of thing will matter in our job," Izuku insisted. "I can't become the best hero if I don't have good public relations, like All Might."
"Hmm," said Todoroki. "I'm not so sure about that. After all, everyone claims that Bakugo and I are your closest competition for that role, and we're no better at that stuff than you, if not worse."
"A top three who are nervous, aloof, and angry respectively," said Tsu flatly. "The country's doomed."
"Why don't you just become the number one then, Tsu," Izuku muttered. "The kids would love it."
Uraraka laughed, and clapped her hands. "See, Deku?" she said with a smile. "You can do funny comebacks and not even stutter! It's just that you're comfortable around us!"
"Great. I'll be sure to keep that in mind and start deep lifelong friendships with every fan so I can get comfortable enough with them to speak properly."
"Midoriya, I wish you would not be so gloomy," Iida admonished. "Also, you've barely touched your food."
"Did anything spur this on?" Todoroki asked. "Besides Uraraka's display, of course."
"Hey!"
"...I only ask because you seemed kind of down and spacey before we even got here. Apologies if I'm misreading the situation." Todoroki continued his level, neutral stare as he sipped up some noodles.
"I, uhh, well…" Izuku scratched his neck. He thought about it, really thought about it.
Then, he turned around to look out at the cafeteria. In the distance, about fifty yards and seven tables away from them, Yui Kodai was sitting with the other girls from 2B. Yanagi was next to her. And…to his horror…the notebook was sitting there on their table. Between them. And it was open.
He went pale. They were…they were reading it. He could see their eyes moving across the page. And their expressions…their expressions…
They seemed curious. Inquisitive. Of course, that could mean anything. Especially with Kodai. And at this distance, it was so hard to tell…
"Midoriya?" Iida asked. "Were you going to answer the question?"
"Oh! Right." He turned back to his friends. "I mean, uhh…well…Todoroki. How did you, umm…" Izuku looked over to the table directly across from them, where Yaoyorozu was sitting with Jiro, Koda, and Tokoyami. He leaned in closer. "How did you know that you liked Yaoyorozu?"
Todoroki's eyebrows shot up. "Oh. So that's what this is about."
Uraraka whistled. "Deku, do you think you might like someone?"
"Who is it?" Tsu asked directly, bluntly.
Todoroki gave them an annoyed glare. "Let me answer his question first before you get all excited."
"Sorry," they both mumbled.
"Anyway, I think it was because…I started getting really worried around her. Worried for her and worried about what she thought of me. I became over-aware of my behavior and demeanor at all times when around her. So, uhh…yeah."
Iida sighed. "Todoroki, I don't think that's very helpful for Midoriya."
"Hmm? Why not?"
"Because…"
Izuku finished for him. "...Because I get that way around everyone." He slumped over his tray, and kept eating half-heartedly.
"Still," Uraraka said after a bit of an awkward silence. "That doesn't mean you don't like this person! Clearly, your intuition was thinking it might be true! C'mon, Deku, who is it?"
"It's not…" Tsu looked at Uraraka with a somewhat nervous expression. "It's not one of us, is it?"
Izuku shook his head honestly. "Don't worry about that."
The two girls exchanged another glance. Izuku would never know it, but both of them were more disappointed than concerned. That's a story for another time, though.
Iida adjusted his glasses. "I don't mean to intrude, but I confess I am a bit curious about this as well, Midoriya. Simply because you have never expressed any sort of opinion on the topic of romance before. Is it…Ashido? On that day in the snow, you did seem to be having quite a bit of fun with her. I can see how your differing personalities might compliment each other. Or perhaps, in a similar vein…Hagakure?"
Izuku felt a shiver go up his spine. "No to both," he answered, a bit quickly. Tsu narrowed her eyes, as if she suspected he was lying.
He noticed that. He looked up at her, and said, "No, really."
"I respect you enough to know that you aren't crushing on Yaoyorozu at the same time as me," Todoroki said. "That leaves Jiro in our class."
"Oooh, that'd be cute…" Uraraka clapped her hands together dreamily. "Oh, Deku, please tell me it's Jiro."
"Sorry to disappoint," Izuku said. "It's not anyone in our class. It's uhh…" He swallowed. "I don't even think I like her, really. I mean, I do, but…not like that. It's like I said before…I get that way around everyone, so it doesn't really mean much."
"It must be Kodai then, right?" Tsu asked.
A long silence. Izuku had forgotten that they had all seen the two of them rolling around in the snow together that one time. Of course that got around. Kaminari probably told everyone who would listen.
"Yeah," he finally said, defeated. "As of late, I've been thinking about her a lot…and having similar thoughts to how Todoroki said he'd been with Yaoyorozu…I think I just want to be friends, though!" he put in quickly at the end.
Uraraka and Tsu exchanged another glance. "Well…Kodai really seems to enjoy your company. If what I saw is anything to go by," Uraraka said.
"She seems like quite an unapproachable girl, but perhaps she's just lonely?" Iida suggested. "I don't mean to psychoanalyze, but maybe it's another case like Todoroki here."
"That's true." Todoroki nodded. "I didn't know it, but back then before you guys included me in your group…I really wanted friends."
"But Kodai does have friends," said Izuku. "She's sitting with them right now." He nodded toward that lunch table.
Tsu blinked at him. "You already knew where they were sitting?"
"Uhh…"
"Were you looking for her earlier?"
"Yes! But that's only because I gave her my Class B hero notebook for her to look at and she's over there reading it right now!" He blurted.
Silence.
All four of them looked at each other, stunned. Izuku's heart pounded. He felt red spread over his cheeks.
"Dude," Todoroki muttered. "You showed her a notebook?"
"You've never even shown us your notebooks," said Uraraka.
"Uhh, yeah…haha…" Izuku scratched his neck in panic. "I was thinking it was kind of stupid for me to sit on all that information that some people might find helpful…so I was thinking I would start showing people, and I guess I wanted to use Kodai as like, a trial run…"
"Using her?" Tsu clicked her teeth like a disappointed mother. "That's a foul, ribbit."
"N-no, not like th-that!" He waved his hands around frantically.
"Deku, I think you need to be honest with yourself," said Uraraka.
"Huh? What do you m-mean?" I am being perfectly honest with myself. It's not like I like Kodai. Even if I did, I have no time for romance with One for All, and no girl wants a worthless Deku like me anyway. The sentence flashed through his mind once again.
Uraraka's face softened. "You must trust Kodai a lot if you shared your notebook with her. But…I think in your anxiety after making the decision, you've forgotten that you trust her. You're letting bad what-ifs cloud your judgement. You've got to keep trusting her, Deku. From what I've seen…I mean, I haven't seen a lot, but I think she does care about you. And she wouldn't…even if she DID think it was weird, I think she would at least give it a chance. She's over there reading it, after all." Uraraka nodded toward the table in the distance.
Iida laughed.
"Hmm?" Todoroki turned to look at him. "What's so funny?"
"It's just…" Iida took his glasses off and wiped them on his jacket. "It's just something I remembered just now. A strange coincidence."
Izuku raised his eyebrows.
"I remember talking to Kendo about class birthdays at some point," Iida continued. "During a representative meeting. It's just funny that we're talking about Kodai at such length, because if my memory is correct…I'm fairly certain her birthday is today."
Izuku's heart stopped.
All four pairs of eyes went to him at once.
His lip trembled. He had never been so pale in his life. The back of his neck prickled, and that panicked, uncontrollable urge to bolt coursed through his body. "I have to go to the bathroom," he squeaked, and ran for it, zooming out of the cafeteria at high speed.
"Oh no," Todoroki muttered.
Iida seemed alarmed. "What was that about?"
"Iida, you big dummy," Uraraka admonished. "If it's Kodai's birthday, and Izuku gave her his notebook, how do you think that's going to be interpreted?"
"Ah! I…didn't think about that!"
"Of course you didn't," she scoffed. Then, she looked around at the other tables nervously. Luckily, it did not seem like anyone nearby had noticed Izuku's flight from the room.
"He's got it bad, ribbit," said Tsuyu.
"Got what?" asked Iida.
"The crush. The crush on Kodai. I decided not to tell him, because the poor guy's already confused enough. But yeah. He's head over heels."
"Agreed," said Uraraka. "The question is…what can we do to help him?"
…
The Class B girls were walking back to the dorm from the cafeteria when someone finally noticed.
"Yui?" Pony asked. "Whatcha got there?" She pointed at the notebook, which Yui was hugging against her chest.
Setsuna and Itsuka both turned to look, and Reiko stepped in front of Yui protectively. "It's nothing!" she blurted quickly.
You just made it worse, Yui thought, sighing inwardly. Reiko's intentions were good, but…
"It's not anything naughty, is it?" Ibara asked in concern. Next to her, Kinoko snorted.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to intrude," Pony half-whispered, backing away from Reiko. Meanwhile…
...Yui felt a hand pull the notebook out from her hands.
Pony's eyes widened as she noticed, and she gasped. Reiko whirled. "Hey!" she protested.
The hand returned to the end of Setsuna's arm, the notebook firmly grasped in her fingers. She grinned widely.
"Setsuna, that's rude!" Ibara exclaimed, incredulous.
"You can't just use your Quirk on the grounds like that!" Itsuka added.
Setsuna laughed them off. "Relax, it's no big deal! Now, Yui, let's see what you've got to hide…" She looked down at the front cover, which clearly said HERO ANALYSIS NO. 21.
"Give it back," Yui growled.
All the girls went silent. Setsuna looked up from the book to Yui, nervously. "Uhh, Yui, I really didn't mean to…"
"Give it back," she repeated. "Now."
Awkwardly, the lizard girl held the book out. Reiko used her Quirk to pull it away, from Setsuna's hands to Yui's. When it was returned to her, Yui hugged the book against her chest again protectively.
How can she be so scary and so cute at the same time?! They all thought to themselves.
"That's one of Midoriya's analysis notebooks, isn't it, shroom?" Kinoko asked. "He's never shroomed - I mean, shared - those with anyone before."
"Exactly," said Itsuka, "which is why Yui does not want anyone to see, as that would be a breach of his privacy. Unless…" Itsuka raised an eyebrow. "Yui, you didn't steal that or anything, did you?"
Yui shook her head.
Setsuna grinned again. "He must trust you a lot, huh."
"I don't know about that," she whispered.
Reiko shrugged casually, as if trying to alleviate the situation. "He gave it to us, said he wanted to start sharing his notebooks around so people could get helpful Quirk tips, then bolted. In that vein, it MIGHT be okay if we were to share it around…he's got profiles on everyone in there, after all. Though since it's unclear, it's best to err on the side of caution."
"Agreed," Itsuka nodded. "Unless you get explicit permission from Midoriya for anyone besides you two to see it, no one else should see it. It's the most respectful thing to do."
"Then again," Yui muttered, "Reiko wasn't even really supposed to see it. It was meant just for me." She clutched it more tightly against her chest.
Setsuna gasped. "Yui, did he know that it was your birthday after all? That sly dog!"
She shook her head. "I don't think so."
"Still…" Reiko smiled enigmatically. "Yui's profile is by far the most detailed of them. It's a notebook for just the people in our class. Kendo, Honenuki, Shiozaki, Tetsutetsu, and Monoma all have a decent amount of detail, but nothing compared to hers."
Itsuka blushed. "He has details on me?"
Don't you blush, Yui thought fiercely, he's mine.
"Man," Pony complained. "I know it's…erm…"
"Intrusive?" Kinoko suggested.
"Yes!" Pony snapped her fingers. "I know it's in-trusive, but I really wanna see what he's written for me. Is that bad?"
Ibara shuddered. "Personally, I find the whole thing slightly unnerving. I suppose it makes sense that he would have more notes on me since I finished higher in the sports festival than the rest of you, but nevertheless I can't help but feel that he might have sinful intentions in what he's doi…"
"Take it back," Yui interrupted her.
Ibara froze, and looked at her in terror. "Err…what?"
"Take it back. Midoriya isn't like that."
"Ah…alright. If you say so, Kodai-san…I s-suppose you know him b-best."
Setsuna and Reiko shared an amused glance.
"Still…" Kinoko drawled. "It'd be nice to have a new perspective on my Quirk, shroom. I feel like I've hit a skill wall with using it."
"Same," Pony agreed. "There's only so much I can do with my horns. Midoriya seems so creative. I bet he's got ways of using our Quirks we haven't even thought of."
As the girls' conversation shifted just to talking about their Quirks, Reiko fell into step with Yui again at the back of the group. "You okay?" she whispered.
Yui frowned. "No."
"I know Setsuna can get to be too much sometimes. It's just…"
"It's not that."
"Oh." Reiko blinked. "...What is it, then?"
Yui nodded her head toward Ibara, who was now discussing something else with Itsuka.
"...What Ibara said? Wait, what did she say?" Reiko scrunched up her face, remembering. "Oh! She said that you know Midoriya best. And…that's what's bothering you?"
Yui nodded.
"Because…you don't think it's true?" she guessed.
Yui nodded again. "I still don't feel like I know him well enough at all," she whispered. "This feeling is so strong…I don't want to fall into it…unprepared."
Reiko nodded. "I know what you mean," she said seriously. "Well, the best solution for that is to hang out with Midoriya more. Do you know what he likes to do?"
Yui shrugged miserably. "Exercise?"
The ghost girl gasped, and clapped her hands together. "Yui, I have a great idea. You're gonna love it."
"Are you sure?" Yui asked dryly.
"Yes. I checked the forecast for tomorrow. It's gonna be sunny and warmer than these past few days. A perfect morning for a nice, long run."
Yui's eyes widened.
…
Whenever I get motivation to write for this fic, it just flows out of me.