Once upon a time
Once when you were mine
I remember skies
Reflected in your eyes
I wonder if you care
I wonder if you think about me
Once upon a time
In your wildest dreams
-"Your Wildest Dreams", The Moody Blues
…………
Tiana wasn't surprised to see Louis standing next to the kitchen window of her house when she returned from working on her restaurant one late September evening. Nor was she surprised to see Eudora leaning out of the window with a piece of meat in her hands, Louis snatching it in his mouth gratefully, Eudora not even flinching despite how seemingly close the gator was to taking her hand along with it. Tiana smiled. Eudora might have objected to the idea of having an alligator around before, but the two had become very close in the past few months.
Louis turned to greet her. "Hey, Tiana!"
"Hey, Louis. Hey, Mama." Tiana stepped inside the house and made her way to the kitchen, Eudora putting her hands on her hips but still smiling, Louis leaning his snout into the open window (although his head was far too large to fit all the way).
"You said you'd only spend a few hours at your restaurant today," said Eudora.
"I did! It's not even seven o'clock yet!"
"Six hours is not a 'few'," said Eudora, but was still smiling in acceptance. "What all did you get done today?"
Tiana grinned. "I think the building's finally up to code! All those old windows are out, the structure's sound… I can start installing new windowpanes and painting it soon. It's really looking swell, Mama."
"Glad to hear," smiled Eudora. "Supper should be ready soon."
"Mama, I'm the cook here," laughed Tiana.
"You mean you would be if you were here more often! Here, Louis, here's another hunk of the fatty part for you." Eudora held out another piece of meat to Louis, who gobbled it up instantly.
"Thanks, Eudora! Keep 'em coming!"
"While you're waiting," Eudora said to Tiana with a smile, "you can read the letter you got from Charlotte today."
Tiana's smile diminished a bit. "Read yet another account of how amazing it is being a princess?" But still, she picked up the letter sitting on the table and opened it. Charlotte's letters might have all been a bit on the irritating side, with constant gushing about how amazing the life of a princess was, but Tiana still appreciated hearing from her friend.
Dear Tiana,
I know I just wrote to you a week ago, but things here in Maldonia are always happening and always happening fast! There was a royal ball tonight in honor of the king's birthday. The royal tailors made me such a pretty gown! I'm not sure if it quite compares to the gowns your mama made for me, but it's still absolutely gorgeous! It's gold with sequins all over the bodice, and the skirt isn't quite as poofy as I normally wear—it ain't a hoop skirt—but it twirls when I spin and makes me feel absolutely gorgeous! Naveen's birthday is in a month, and there'll be another royal ball and another chance for me to wear a pretty dress like this! And then my birthday's a month after that, and I get yet another new dress! I can't wait! I just wish you were here so you could try these dresses on too—I know you'd look gorgeous in them!
That actually brings me to the real reason why I'm writing you again so soon. Tia, you've GOT to come visit us. I ain't going to let you make any excuses this time! There's so much to see and do here and I know you'll love it here. Your restaurant ain't going anywhere. Just a few weeks here in Maldonia's all I'm asking! I was thinking maybe you could come by around Christmastime. It'd be wonderful to have you here and celebrate the holidays with us! And Naveen says that Christmases here in Maldonia are a huge celebration with lots of lights and music. You've just got to be here! Please write me back as soon as you get this and let me know when you can get away. I'm thinking maybe if we can get you tickets on a ship that leaves December 8th you could get here around December 15th, which would give us plenty of time to catch up on things!
I'll be talking to you soon! Can't wait to hear your voice again and see you at the palace in a few months!
Love,
Charlotte
And, written in a perfectly polished hand on the margin, there was an additional note:
Tiana,
If I were you, I would not brush off Charlotte's invitation so lightly! She is close to coming to New Orleans herself and dragging you on the next boat out of there. We both would very much love to see you again. And taste your delicious benyays!
Naveen
Tiana smirked for a brief second at Naveen's misspelling of the word "beignets", before her face fell as she realized that there was probably no getting out of this one. "I'm in trouble," she moaned out loud.
"What's the matter?" Louis asked.
"Lottie's insistent that I come visit her," Tiana said, looking at the letter and biting her lip with worry. "She even got Naveen to pitch in with this letter." She pressed her palm against her forehead. "She's already got it figured to the day when the ship I'll be comin' on leaves New Orleans. Lord help me."
Eudora just chuckled, however. "About time that girl took some initiative. If that's what it takes to get you to Maldonia…"
Tiana groaned. "Mama, you can't be siding with them too!"
"Tiana, honey, you can't avoid them forever. After all, they're the two people you care about most in the world."
"I know they are," Tiana retorted, "and that's why I can't…" She didn't finish her sentence, however, instead merely biting her lip and looking at the letter again, or more specifically the short note in the margin in a different handwriting. That's the first time Naveen's written to me, even if it is short, she thought to herself, a sad smile creeping up on her lips.
"Aw, you gotta go see them!" Louis said. "You miss them, don't you?"
"More than anything," Tiana admitted before she could stop herself. She quickly looked back at both Eudora and Louis, who were both smiling expectedly at her, and finally Tiana let herself smile too, her resolve broken by their enthusiasm. "I guess there's no fightin' it. Lottie's gonna get me to Maldonia one way or another, so I might as well go willingly."
Eudora grinned. "Now that's the first sensible thing you've said in months!"
"How can it be sensible and completely foolish at the same time?" Tiana said, part of her instantly regretting giving in so easily. "Do you know how long I'm gonna be gone?"
"Your restaurant can wait—" Eudora began.
"I ain't worried about my restaurant as much as I am about Buford and Cal," said Tiana. "They ain't gonna like me being gone so long."
"Tiana, for the four years you've been working at both restaurants, you haven't missed a single day of work," said Eudora. "I think you're entitled to take a little vacation by now."
"And besides, even if you ain't," Louis added, "you have a prince and princess telling you you have to go! Nobody can argue with that!"
"I guess not," smiled Tiana. "Especially when the prince is as charming as Naveen and the princess is as insistent as Lottie."
…………
Naveen awoke to a harsh ray of sunlight streaming through his window, prying open his eyes despite his inner curses and protests at the light. Yesterday had been an excruciating day for him. He had spent all day in Parliament meetings with his father. Now that he was actually married he was being expected to act, well, like a prince. To compensate for a day of responsibility, Naveen had spent all night downtown at the pubs. He hadn't been there since returning from New Orleans, having to keep up his new respectable persona… but quite frankly lately he really didn't care anymore. If anyone raised Cain about it he would just say that he was out winning the support of the common folk in order to be a better king one day, just like Prince Hal from Henry IV Part One. A Shakespearean reference in an excuse… he'd have to at least get points for that.
He squinted his eyes tightly, although that did little to keep the sunlight out of them. Turning over to face the other way, he sensed, and then opened his eyes and saw, that Charlotte had already awoken and left. Well, that wasn't too surprising. Judging by where the sun was in the sky, it had to be at least nine o'clock by now—
The doors to the bedroom burst open and Charlotte shot her way into the room, shrieking with excitement. "Naveen Naveen Naveen! Look what came in the mail today!" She pushed an envelope into his face, not seeming to notice or care that he wasn't quite fully awake yet. "It worked, it worked, it worked! Tiana's finally coming to visit us!"
"Charlotte, it is far too early to… Tiana?" Naveen instantly perked up and snatched the envelope from Charlotte's hands, pulling out the letter and unfolding it.
Dear Lottie and Naveen,
Alright, you win. Can't keep arguing with you two anymore, especially when both my mama and Louis are on your side, too!
Lottie, whenever you can get the tickets, just let me know so I can let Buford and Cal know when I'm going to be gone. No date really works the best for me, but if I have to go I have to go! December 8th works as good as any other day. Once you get the ticket just mail it to me, although I'm sure I don't have to tell you that. Have you thought about return tickets yet? Are you going to send me my return ticket along with it, or will you just get it for me while I'm in Maldonia? I don't plan on staying much past New Year's.
The restaurant's looking great. I've finally gotten that hole in the ceiling patched up and strengthened the foundations. It should be up to code and actually safe to stand in now! Although there are still a few rotten floorboards I need to take out and get replaced. Hopefully I can begin painting and prettying it up soon.
Naveen, if you want any of my beignets while I'm there, you're going to have to be on your best behavior! I ain't just handing them out, you know!
You both know I don't want to be away from my jobs and my restaurant for so long, but I really am looking forward to coming and seeing you. I miss you both very much. See you in a few months!
Love,
Tiana
"Achidanza!" Naveen exclaimed joyfully, hugging the letter to him. "She is finally coming!"
"That's what I just told ya, silly!" Charlotte laughed. "If only she was comin' sooner, she could help me with that food bank charity drive next month that I have to organize…" She shrugged, turning back towards the bedroom door. "Guess I'd better get started preparing for that now—that is, after I read to some schoolchildren this afternoon. Gotta do that Friday, too."
"In English, I hope," said Naveen, looking at Charlotte in surprise. Her initial efforts to learn Maldonian had not gone smoothly at all, causing Charlotte, in frustration, to give up on the language altogether. Thankfully many people, especially in the royal court, spoke English as well, but when interacting with the general populace Maldonia's princess often needed to haul along a translator with her.
"Of course! It's good for them to learn another language. Well, toodles!" Charlotte was gone in a flash, which was probably a good thing, since Naveen was rolling his eyes at her hypocrisy as far as learning new languages was concerned.
The room was quiet once again. With Charlotte gone, Naveen turned again to the letter, the smile back on his face. It was addressed to both of them. The few letters Tiana had sent before this had only Charlotte's name on them, but this one… this one she had written to him as well. And she missed them. She missed him! She missed HIM! And oh, if she missed him even a fraction as much as he missed her, then she missed him badly. Fervently. Undeniably.
And she had signed the letter "love". Dare he even hope…
"This is ridiculous," he chastised himself aloud. Signing a letter "love" was fairly standard, after all. It didn't mean that she actually… And besides, even if she did, that would just complicate things, him being married to someone else and all. And Tiana—with her restaurant dreams, she surely had no room in them for him. She was off-limits.
How cruelly ironic. The one woman he actually loved was the only one he couldn't allow himself to get close to.
He read the letter again, smiling at her sass at him, smiling at her enthusiastic update on her restaurant, smiling at the fact that she was coming, she was coming, he was going to see her again and maybe feel whole again. She seemed happy in her note, and by extension Naveen was happy too. Oh, it would take every ounce of self-control he had to stop himself from pulling her towards him and kissing her senseless when he first saw her. But that didn't matter. She was happy, and he was happy that she was happy, even though to keep that happiness he clearly had to remain as detached from her as possible.
She probably didn't really think of him much, anyway, if he was honest with himself. He hadn't really given her much reason to… certainly not as much as she had given him. Her thoughts of him were probably those of mild annoyance, actually, judging by her little note to him. That hadn't changed. The "missing-both-of-you" statement was probably just her being cordial…
But why had she addressed the letter to both of them, then, if she didn't…
Oh. Right. Because he had left her a note in Charlotte's latest letter to her. She was simply acknowledging that.
She probably doesn't think about me that much, Naveen thought sadly, setting the letter down on the nightstand. But as long as she's happy…
…………
Tiana angrily turned over in her bed, her heart aching so much that she was completely unable to fall asleep.
This was not a new thing. This had become the norm, unfortunately; however exhausted Tiana was after her day, it still took her ages to finally fall asleep. It was impossible to sleep when all she could do at night was think about Naveen. Now, as the days to her departure for her Maldonian trip inched closer and closer, the thoughts only intensified, wounding her even more as they played their delightful torture over and over again. And this night, the night of December seventh, her trunk packed and ready to leave the very next day, her whole body ached with longing, as the tears she had kept inside of her mostly successfully up until now were leaking out of her eyes freely.
She wished she was still a frog.
Every day she, to her horror, had been closer and closer approaching that resolve, and finally tonight neither her mind nor her heart could fight it anymore. She wished Charlotte's kiss hadn't worked. She wished that she and Naveen had been stuck as frogs for the rest of their lives. So she wouldn't be able to open her restaurant—who cared? She would have had him, so what did it matter what else she had or didn't have? She would have had the most important thing in the world to her.
She wished the riverboat hadn't passed by the sugar mill, distracting her that night. She wished that she hadn't inadvertently interrupted Naveen when he was… when he was trying to propose to her, if what Ray had said was right. Pulling the covers of her bed to her face in despair, she winced with heartbreak. She had been so, so close to true happiness and she hadn't even realized it. That was what hurt more than anything else. That if she had been a little less dense, right now she could be completely and truly happy.
No no no no no no no! He was a womanizer, a philanderer, a complete and utter scumbag, and he was simply being charming and irresistible to her because he didn't know how to be otherwise, not because he actually genuinely felt that way for her. No. Yes. She touched her neck, remembering the way he had toyed with her necklace and looked into her eyes the last time they had seen each other. No. Yes. Maybe. What was WRONG with her.
She remembered when they had danced, as frogs. Something inside of Tiana had melted, something that she hadn't even realized had grown so cold. Even when working towards her dream, although it did often make her happy, there was still always a painful, stressed tug nagging her as well. But not that night. That tug vanished as they shot into the air, an exhilarating rush igniting her veins, and for the first time in her life she didn't feel anything else nagging in her mind. She felt completely happy. So completely happy that she had let out a laugh, a laugh of pure joy, completely unplanned because she didn't know how else to express it. They had landed on the lily pad and while the rush was gone, the joy remained. Naveen had wrapped his arms around her and smiled, a hesitant, surprised smile that she hadn't quite seen on his face before, and suddenly Tiana felt safe. She felt safe, she felt happy, and she felt nothing negative whatsoever.
Like her laughter, she hadn't intended on touching his face. Some way of thanking him, maybe. Or maybe something else. Maybe she didn't quite realize what was happening when he slowly pulled her closer to him, when their eyes closed, when their mouths were so close she could feel his breath. Or maybe she did.
But it still startled her. Startled her enough to suddenly push him away, and then try to come up with an excuse as to why—the fact that he was planning on marrying Charlotte was certainly a valid one, but one that took her a minute to find.
They hadn't kissed. She had kept her distance from her best friend's fiancé as best she could. And then her best friend had whisked him away from her and married him just like had been planned, a plan that Tiana herself had whole-heartedly supported before… before actually getting to know Naveen.
She flipped over in her bed again, now staring out the window. How could she spend even a day in Maldonia, with him, knowing fully well how close she had been to having him? How could that make her any less miserable than she was now, apart from him?
The evening stars shone through her window.
"Evangeline… Ray…" Tiana murmured to them, "please… please help me to be happy again. Please. I just want to be happy. Help me get over him. I don't want to be in love with him… I never did, but I can't stop thinking about him. He makes me happy and miserable all at the same time, and I can't take it any longer… please, just make me happy again…"