Chapter 22

"Bella," I stutter as I look right at her.

"Leave it," she hisses giving me a stern look. "Lets just find out what happened at school," she carries on.

I pull at my hair knowing I need to talk to Jennifer and it shouldn't be done up here in her room.

"Let's go down the stairs and we can eat as we talk," I say looking back at Jennifer pleadingly. She looks from me to Bella biting her bottom lip.

"Come on," I whisper with a head nod. My guilt increases knowing fully I have screwed up royally with her, but I know I can fix this. I never said I was perfect.

"Come on honey, it's fine. I don't think you have done anything wrong," Bella tells her holding out her hand. Jennifer bobs her head, taking my hand then Bella's.

"I'll make dinner, and let you two talk," Bella says as soon as we reach the ground floor.

As she walks away, I pull her back to me and lock eyes with her. I find that I am unable to speak. I've learned so much that I feel a bit overwhelmed.

"I did what I had to," Bella tells me. "No apologies needed," she says with the smallest smile. I close my eyes as the sinking feeling of knowing how badly I have miss judged her hits me.

"We still need to talk." I am just able to say it above a whisper.

"I know, but why don't you deal with your daughter first. I'm not going anywhere," she snorts. "Beside I live pretty close and you seem to be my dad's new best friend, so there's really no escaping you." I give her a weak smile back letting go of her arm. My eyes stay with her as she walks into my kitchen.

I let out a breath and sit down next to Jennifer who seems to be frowning.

"I'm sorry. I know I have screwed up." She turns and looks at me. "I should have asked you for your side. I..." I stop talking because I have no idea why I didn't. All I did was take the side of the school.

"Okay, most people trust teachers and every one believes them. But, I did hit Mathew," Jennifer says dropping her head.

"Can you tell me why?"

"He was calling Eric names even after Eric asked him to stop."

"Okay?" I question feeling as if I am still missing something.

"He said he was a waist of space, that he shouldn't talk unless he told him to. It made me think about what my mom and dad use to say to me, and I got angry. I signed to him to stop or I would tell you, but he laughed and said you weren't my real dad, and that you would send me back because I was a freak." Jennifer starts to cry. "He kept calling me a freak and said that I should have been dead just like my loser parents. He laughed in my face, so I punched him." I pull her into my arms feeling angry and hurt, that this little shit did that to her.

"Oh baby, I will not leave you. It's just you and me against the world," I hush to her as she cries.

"Why didn't you tell Mrs. Cope?" I ask in wonder.

"I tried to tell, and she said just because he was calling me names, didn't mean I could hit him. She then said I should remember that sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me. But they did and I would rather be hit then have what he said, said to me." I let out a soft breath having no idea how to deal with this.

"That's not true, Sweetie," Bella whispers. Her eyes flash to mine as if she is asking if she can talk, so I bob my head at her.

"I get called a lot of names at school," Bella starts saying.

"Does it hurt you?" Jennifer asks.

"It used to. It used to hurt a lot, until I realized that those people meant nothing to me. They weren't my friends, my family, and I knew I was a better person than what they were. So now, I just act bored till they go away."

"Do they?"

Bella shakes her head. "Sometimes they do, other times they don't. Sometimes their words hurt, and those times I go to my dad. I even called him from school one day because it hurt so much." Bella stops and smiles. "He told me he loved me and that he was proud of me. He would tell me it was okay if I was a freak because I was his freak, and that meant I was different, like I stood out from the others. That did help me feel better," Bella says and her eyes move back to me.

"Your teachers were right, in a way. You should not have hit him, but sometimes it's hard to control that anger inside, even some adult can't do it. I am sure D here has arrested his fair share of people who couldn't control it."

"I have." I agree. "I have even lost control and hit others when they've done nothing," I tell them, quickly glancing at Bella.

"But he's always doing stuff to me. Esme said when I first started it was because he liked me," Jennifer says, but this just makes Bella bite her lip and groan.

"What's wrong, don't you agree?" Jennifer asks.

"That's a talk for another time," Bella sighs. "But dinner should be just about ready. I'll go plate it up and give you a shout when everything is all set."

I watch Bella walk out and look back at Jennifer "What happened the day I arrested Bella for stealing?"

Jennifer's head drops and I tilt it back up so she's looking at me. "I should have asked. Being a cop I should have done that as a part of my job."

I drop my hand from her face as it comes to me that I didn't even look at the CTV footage. "Fuck." I hiss. I am a better cop than this, much better.

"Alice was acting strange. I'm not sure really, she seemed sad. She was picking things up, things we weren't out for, and then put them in her bag. You never told me how to call you when you are at work, so I called Bella using Alice's phone. She arrived just as Alice tried to leave. I was so scared, but Bella said she'd sort it out, that Alice and I should stand outside the office. She went in with the man, and then you came, and arrested Bella." I frown still unsure of what happened, but I know the answer may lay with Bella.

"Okay," I whisper to her. "Next time just remind me that I am meant to talk to you. You should never be afraid of telling me something." I open my arms in hope that she comes to me.

I close my eyes as I thank my lucky stars as she moves on to my lap. "How long am I grounded for?" she whispers to me and I shake my head at her.

"I love you, Princess, and I am really sorry, and you're not grounded. I over reacted, and just so you know, I will be speaking with the school. I know that you were wrong to hit him, but they should not be giving him a green light in calling you names," I tell her.

"D, kiddo, dinner's out." I look around smiling at Bella.

"Thanks, Pe..." I clamp my mouth shut stopping the word petal from coming out. "I need to find a new nickname for you," I mutter as I walk past her thinking of what I could call her.

"What about girlfriend?" Jennifer asks and I look down at her.

"That is someone you are dating." I inform her shaking off why she would even say that.

Jennifer shrugs her shoulders. "What about...hum….I know Bella!" I snort at her suggesting, but as I look at her, I see that she doesn't look to happy about me picking out another name for her.

I help Jennifer sit as Bella places down the plates, and then I help her to sit.

"Bella?"

"Yeah, Baby Girl?"

"Why were you upset about what Esme said? You don't think that he likes me?"

"No, it's not that," Bella says looking at Jennifer. "I believe telling a young girl that a boy hurting her means he likes you is wrong. Instead, tell the truth and say that it is him being mean and he is a little shit. You must know that love and hurt aren't on the same page. I love you, D loves you and do we hurt you like that?" Jennifer shakes her head. "That's real love and you settle for nothing less than that." As soon as she says those words, I know what got her so upset. Although, now that I'm thinking about it, I have to agree with Bella; why do we tell young girls that boys hurting them means they like you. Maybe if we didn't say such a thing, many women wouldn't willingly stay with a man that beats them.

"Okay," Jennifer says, but looks confused.

"What?" I ask.

"You've hurt Bella's feelings, so if what Bella said is true, then you don't like her." I swallow feeling that old shitty feeling work its way back up over my behavior. The shitty feeling seems to take a side step as I start to feel confused to why Jennifer seems so upset with the thought of me not liking Bella that way.

"Baby, adults are a little different. You see, Edward got his mom's view of me first and because he loves his mom, he trusted her. Sometimes it's hard to have a different view than the one our parents have. Beside, he hasn't hurt me much, and most of the time it was on me…. I can annoy a saint!"

I shake my head and cover Bella's hand. "It was me, well mostly me. I had my head up my bottom, but believe me, I will not hurt her again, I promise." I turn looking at Bella so she knows I mean what I am saying.

"Good," Jennifer says smiling at us and begins to eat happily.

I walk back in to the kitchen happy to see Bella is still here. She said she would stay so we could talk. I was worried that as soon as I went upstairs to put Jennifer to bed, she would run out on me knowing I couldn't do anything about it.

"Stop cleaning and come tell me what happened," I say getting right to the point.

"I'm almost done," Bella tells me as she carries on washing my dishes.

"Please," I say taking hold of her hands. "I need to know and I have kept myself calm for more than two hours," I say looking right at her. I notice some of her hair is now darling over her face. I move my hand up, undoing her hair band. I add the lose strand to the pony tail and then replace the hair band. The whole time my eyes seem to have stayed on her, and there seems to be a warm buzz between us.

"Doll," I mutter with a smile. "And Sweeties," I carry on knowing that they are the perfect name for her.

"Doll? You know this is twenty-sixteen, not nineteen-sixteen?" Bella asks with a snort, but I know she likes the names.

"I could call you doll face." Bella raises her eyebrows at me and I wink at her. "Stop trying to get out of this and come talk to me." I take hold of her hand and pull her back to my living room.

I plonk her down and then take the seat right next to her, but I sit sideways so I can face her.

"What happened?"

Bella swallows and then looks down. "I think Alice is Bi-Polar." I frown, but I know by the way she's talking she means what she said.

"I… Alice was, always was getting bullied at school. Her friends Jessica and Lauren are the biggest pair of bitches that spent more time pulling her down than helping her. Then there is Jacob..." Bella just makes a face.

"Six months ago, I was out and saw Alice at the cliffs, she…she said she wasn't going to jump," I feel my heart leap out of my chest at Bella's words. "She was just looking over." It's clear Bella didn't believe Alice's words.

"After that I watched her, and saw she was," Bella closes her eyes, "cutting herself." Her eyes slowly open and I see she's holding back tears. "We became friends and the more I hung out with her, the more I saw she was depressed. For whatever reason, no one else saw it. They just saw this bubbly girl that was always happy and cheerful. I tried to talk to your mom, but by then she didn't like me and closed the door on me. Then that party came, and I knew she was on some kind of high, which meant something was coming and then she would hit rock bottom. When Jenny called, I left my appointment with Tia and went to the shop. I managed to talk the guard into not saying anything, and letting me take the wrap for it. I couldn't let her go to jail. She was so out of touch, and I didn't want her to take a downer being in a place like that. She's my friend and I didn't want to find out she killed herself. I promised that I would help her." I close my eyes feeling overwhelmed by everything Bella's just said.

"I'm sorry." My eyes spring open to see Bella still looks upset. I pull her to me and hold her close.

"I am so sorry. You have no idea how sorry I am. Please forgive me?" I ask just as I'm hit with the memory of me telling her that I was not ready to forgive her… hell she didn't even do anything wrong.

"I'm sorry, I know that I don't deserve your forgiveness, but I need it." My hand moves to her face as I plead with her.

Bella looks right back at me and bobs her head. My own head moves forward, and before I even know what I am doing, my lips are on hers. My eyes open as my whole body comes alive.

The feeling of her being under my skin seems to take over as I release her lip. As our eyes lock once more, this time we both move together as our lips touch. Her hands go in to my hair and I pull her on to my lap.

"GET YOUR DIRTY TRAMPY HANDS OFF MY SON!"