*8* hi everyone! i apologize for my absence lately. i picked up a night job so my time to write has dwindled alittle, i promise to pick back up and hope you enjoy this chapter, i loved writing them all together. :) **
Chapter 58: Family
The whole world stopped for a split second when Kylo bends down and picks up the child. Who looks so small in his arms. Kylan lays his head on his fathers shoulder and closes his eyes. The movement looks so natural to him.
Kylo raises his hand and runs it through his sons messy thick black hair. Soaking in everything about him that he can. He pauses, looking strait at Poe with narrow evil eyes.
"They are my family. Not yours." He raises his hand from Kylans sleeping head and waves Poe unconscious and looks back at me. "I haven't decided what to do with him yet... but you... come here.." He points to the ground in front of him. I take a quick glance at Poe, laying on his stomach in the ground. I slowly walk to I front of Kylo and reach to take Kylan from him but he grabs my hands in to his free hand. "Do you love him? The resistance pilot." He says. In a deep tone that indicates he is angry.
"No! Absolutely not! He has helped me out this last year. If it wasn't for him I'm sure I wouldn't be here right now. I have spent the last year and such waiting for you! You just left..." The tears start and he drops my hands. "I would just look at the stars and cry for you. YOU! I pushed with my thoughts, I tried to find you with the force, I couldn't sense if you were dead or alive! What did you do? Why did you leave me like that! For so long!" I wipe the running tears off my face and step awake. Turning away from him and cry into my hands. I hear him shuffle behind me and then his hands are on my shoulders and I look up to meet his face. He takes a deep breath while I look behind me to see Kylan sleeping next to Ana again.
"Do you want to talk about this right now?" He closes his eyes and when he opens them again them look sad, sunken, and depleted.
"I need to know." I say quietly. He pulls me in for a hug and kisses the top of my head before stepping away and rubbing his chin. Looking over at Poe and then back to me.
"When I left you that morning, I was torn between staying actually. I didn't want to leave my beautiful pregnant wife to send her to my forsaken mother, but I thought..." He winces. "She would keep you safe. But that proves once again I'm the only one who can keep you safe."
"And Poe." I say, his eyes narrow and he looks at lifeless looking Poe, making a disgusted face at him and back at me.
"By seclusion you on a fucking island." He says.
"Oh cause you secluding us is any better." I say. I
"Actually yes, because I'm your husband. Did you forget?" He says. I cross my arms and turn away. I don't want to be arguing with him right now. It's pointless no we have spent so much time apart that we are wasting our time now with bickering. Stubborn Kylo. "I spent the next few weeks in Bespin. I know your angry that I turned off the connection, and I promise to tell you how. But I only shut it off on your end. I could still feel you... I knew you were safe. I used the holo in Bespin to watch you."
He stop, inhaling the look of disbelief on my face.
"I use to watch you nap near the lake. Your belly growing big. I was planning my attack on Snoke..." The first time he has ever called him Snoke, he spits the words out with disgust. "But he decided to pay me a visit on Bespin, and he found out about you. I pleaded with him to let me explain, but he would have no such thing. He ordered the General to go and retrieve you. He was going to have me kill you in front of him Rey, I couldn't have that. So I..." He shuffles his feet. Uncomfortable. "I attacked him."
"But you won." I say. Reassuring him he did the right thing.
"I umm.." He runs the bridge of his nose. "I died." He says. He looks at me quick and back to the running water of the falls. "I lost part of my arm and my lower leg." He wiggles his left foot. "My heart stopped, but for some reason it was able to restart. A year ago today... And I tried to turn the connection back on but I couldn't. I don't know, maybe I'm messed up. I knew you came here with the babies after they were born, I was relieved to see you. I couldn't come just yet. I was healing... I was angry you were with him..." He runs his hand through his hair. "Then you left and that's when I couldn't find you."
"You died?..." I pause. "Well that explains things." He snaps his head in my direction.
"Explains what?" He says.
"Didn't you see when sifting through my memories? The ways the babies were born. My heart stopped." I say to him. He grabs my face and kisses me hard at the same time looking deeper into my memories for that day. His lips part from mine and he gasps.
"Maybe we broke the bond." He frowns.
"You should be happy. I won't be bothering you every second." I chuckle.
"I always want to be with you." He says, he closes his eyes and grabs me into a deep hug. Inhaling my sent. I forgot what it felt like to be held like this. I squeeze back. Taking in everything at once.
"You can't kill him. I will never forgive you..." I start but then I hear a shuffle next to me. Ana crawling off the blanket. I back away from Kylo and go and pick her up, rubbing the dirt off her little knees and hands. I look up and Kylo is just watching us. Ana r aching up and squeezing my nose and giggling. I walk over to him and hand her to her dad. He takes her with ease. More gentle than with Kylan.
Ana reaches up and runs his fingers down her little cheek.
"Just like her mother." He says as her eyes close and she leans into his big hand. "I won't kill him, not in front of the children. But you are coming with me. Right now." He says to me. I look down as Kylan wraps his little chubby arms around my leg. I look at the three of them and over to Poe, who is still unconscious on the field. I look up at Kylo.
"Okay." I say. Kylo smiles and surprises me by tossing Ana in the air. She smiles and giggles. My heart melting at the sight. Kylo leans down and scoops up Kylan in his other arm. Looking between the two of them. Memorizing their faces. The faces of his children that he has never met.
"We will finish talking about this later. They are waiting for us back on the ship. Things will be different now. Don't worry." He says.
"Can you wake him?" I ask. He looks over to Poe.
"No. You are to never speak to him again." He says and narrows his eyes at me. He starts to turn to walk up the ramp.
"How did you find me here?" Did you know I was going to be here?" I ask. He stops and turns back to me. Ana puts her arms out for me and starts to cry, I walk over to him and grab her. Instantly soothing her.
"I have had certain places under patrol. This place being one of them. I knew eventually you would find you way back. I actually am surprised it took so long." He says. He puts his free arm around me and continues me up my shuttle ramp. He sets Kylan down in his seat and I do Ana. I am surprised at what was Kylo is around the kids. He doesn't even second guess anything. Once the kids are buckled in I look out the ramp to Poe, still laying on the ground.
"You can't leave him like that Kylo. I will never forgive you..." He puts his hand up and stops me.
"I just got you back, I am not going to make a mess of things. He waves his hand in Poe's direction and slowly he starts to move his arms and then lift his head up to meet my gaze before Kylo shuts the ramp door. He drags me over to the co seat and sits down and takes control. The shuttle rumbling to life and off the ground. Before I know it we are in space.
"Where are we going?" I ask.
"The SiderealStar." He smiles at me.
"You... You finished it." I ask. Amazed and also disgusted he has built such a weapon.
"Yes, I have had a lot of free time on my hands and... I needed to focus on something." He says. "The new troops work much faster than I inticipated. General Green has been assigned to command the Destroyer. I trust him." He says. He hits the hyperdrive bottom and we soon are in a swirl of blue.
I get a memory flashback of the Destroyer when we left Castle Heast. I mark to ask about that later. I just look at Kylos face and how much I have missed it. Missed him.
"I love you." I say. He turns to me and smiles. He slowly gets up from his seat and kneals in front of me. Leaning in for a kiss. Pulling me in to meet him halfway. It was a deep passionate kiss. A kiss I have desired for so long to come from his lips. He pulls away, his eyes still closed.
"I have waited for you to say that for what feels like a lifetime." He says. His eyes open, full of lust and love. "I love you too." He gives me another quick kiss and sits back in his seat. "We're here." And the shuttle shoots out of hype drive and a large metal planet, someone resembles the Starkiller, is in front of us. Covered in greenery and mountains. We fly low and land near a door in the side of a mountain. I can see the top of the mountain is surrounded by Windows. A place hidden in plane sight.
"This is massive." I say. He looks over at me and laughs.
"Welcome home. It's the safest place to be, I can assure you. I designed it myself of course. Plenty of space for them." He looks behind us to the kids passed out in their seats. Exhausted from a long day in the sun. Doesn't look like they will be getting much of it here and the idea saddens me. How is this prison any better than the island. Secluded from the world.
Is this how my whole life is going to be.
He gets up and goes to unbuckle Ana and cradles her in his big arm, she's to big for me to do that. I slowly pull Kylan to his seat and shift him to my front to lay his head on my shoulder, Kylo lowers the ramp and we slowly walk out. Greeted at the large metal doors by two Stormtroopers. They salute Kylo and stand like that till we are inside. I can already feel Kylos power among them.
"Does everyone here know about us?" I whisper once inside. We load onto a small elevator and Kylo hits a few buttons, I feel the elevator jolt upwards slowly.
"Around here, Yes." He says. "Their lives are programmed to defend you three." His eyes serious. Ana shuffles in her fathers arms. We reach the top and the doors open. I'm amazed and taken back.
A comfortable roomy living room, large and open with a view of the Siderealstar that could take your breath away. Land and woods for as far as I can see. I see a hallways on the left, an open doorway leading to what I can partially make out as a kitchen, and then two large wooden doors beside it.
"Do you like it?" Kylo says, placing his hand on my lower back and easing me forward into the living room. "I built it especially for us, for Ana and Kylan." He looks at the sleeping boy on my side. What a long day they have had. "I like his name." He smiles at me.
"He's heavy." I note to him.
"Oh yes, their rooms." He says. He walks towards the hallway. "Iv been waiting so long for this." He walks about halfway down the long hallway and opens a wide door, gesturing me to walk in first. Inside the room are dark blue walls, painted with a black rubbed paint to resemble space. White dots for stars. A large round crib with blue fabric around the bars, and a tall black matching dresser.
"Fit for a Prince." I smile up at him. When Kylan wakes up he is going to love this. I lay him down in the bed on the soft black satin sheet, covering him with the dark blue blanket laying over the side. He looks majestic in the soft light. A window covered in dark shades is on the far wall over a small black bench. I turn and slowly walk out the room, closing the door behind me.
He turns and walks to the next door. He slowly opens it to a brighter, white and grey room. Resembling the clouds in Bespin on the walls. A white round crib, draped in white nylon. Accents of yellow surround the room, resembling sunshine. He slowly walks over to the crib and lays Ana down, covering he with a white blanket and rubbing her head before turning to me. It's dimly lit. Perfect for a nap, they will be up soon.
We walk out of the room and I let out a long held in breath. A sigh of relief. For the first time ever they have actual beds... rooms... I start crying. Overwhelmed by the day, still in shock I'm here with Kylo. Poe's confused face as we left. I cover my eyes with my hands, trying to forget the image. What is he going to tell Finn, Burg... He's bound to go back to the Resistance and tell them I turned. I never got a chance to explain.
I feel Kylo wrap his arms around me.
"I wish I could feel what your feeling, I miss it. Iv missed you so much Rey." He kisses the top of my head, causing me to cry harder. Iv missed him. His touch, his smell, his everything.
But what I miss the most we don't have anymore.
"How will you still love me if you can't be connected with me?" I pull away and look up to him.
"There is so much else to love about you." He breaths. "And maybe we can try and spark it back up." He leans in a kisses me. My insides bubbles and heat. I want this too. He leans down, without breaking a kiss, and swoops me into his arms. I pull back and giggle.
"Can I shower first?" I say. Almost embarrassed.
"Of course. I'll make you something to eat." He says. He gives me another kiss and carries me to infront of the two large doors. "Caring you over the threshold." He smiles and kisses my forehead. He closes his eyes and the doors open. He steps forward and sets me down.
We are in a large black and red room. A large dark wood bed with tall posts is in the middle of the room, large windows scaling the walls covering in sheer back shades, masking most of the outside glare. Two large dressers and a... vanity. I walk over to the bed and run my hands over the soft fur blanket over red satin sheets. The headboard covered in a surplus of black fur pillows and red sleek pillows. I could sleep for days here. I look over to Kylo, who is leaning against the doorway. Hand overnights chin, just watching me with a smirk on his face.
"I don't believe you designed this." I laugh.
"Well when your the ruler of the Dark Side, you get whatever you want." He says.
"Weren't you kinda the ruler before?" I ask, looking over his perfect structured face. Now even more handsome with the scar gone.
"I was... But I had no need for these things. And Snoke would of never approved." He snickers. "The fresher is through those doors. Your clothes are in the short dresser. I'll be waiting for you." He leans away and the doors close behind him. I'm alone in this master room. I shake my head and walk into the large black marble bathroom. A large glass wall shower with two shower heads on one end and a wall to wall black tub. I run my fingers along the sink and look up at myself. I'm thin, frail. My hair is so long and wavy. I need a good wash and a good meal.
For awhile I let the hot water hit me. Enjoying the feeling. When done I finger curl my hair and brush my teeth. Making myself as nice as I can. I walk over to the drawers. Curious of what I'll find. Kylo was so prepared we would be here one day.
I search through, find a bra and underwear... I flush when I see them. Picturing Kylo buying these.
I dress in black tight pants and a black long sleeve. There is more in there but this deemed appropriate. I walk out into the living room, slowly. Kylo is standing, looking out the window. I walk over to him and touch his arm, his eyes widen when he looks down at me, running his fingers through my hair.
"You have been away far to long." He says.
"I was just waiting for you." I say. I look at his hands one still covered in the glove. "Can I see?" I ask. He lifts his right hand and wiggles his fingers. He lifts his left and and slowly takes of his right glove. A black metallic hand emerges he pulls up his sleeve. It stop right under his elbow.
"It doesn't hurt." He says and smiles at me. He lowers his sleeve and puts his glove back on. I look around the room and in the corner my eyes focus upon something that makes my skin tense. His helmet. He notices I'm staring at it.
"Do you still wear it?" I whisper.
"Of course." He says.
"I almost forgotten what it looked like. I always just pictured your face." I say. He grabs my chin and slowly makes me look at him.
"Your face never left my mind. I felt so empty without you. So... Alone." He says. His other hand reaches around and sprawls out on my back. Just then my stomach rumbles. I look down and frown. Of all times...
"I made you some food. We have all the time in the world together. Your home Rey, right where you should be. And I will NEVER let you go. I love you." He leans down and kisses my neck, he stops when he notices the chain above my collar, just tucked in my shirt. He leans back and slowly pulls the chain up to revel the small carving he gave me before he left. He runs his hands over it.
"I never gave up hope we would see each other again. No man could ever replace you. I would have waited a lifetime." I say.
"Thank you." He says.
"For what?" I tilt m head to the side, my hair tumbling over my shoulder.
"For never giving up hope." He leans in an kisses me. Letting the necklace dangle down. He grabs my hand softly and kisses it. And leads me to the black marble kitchen with a eat in breakfast nook. It's cozy, fit for a small family. On the table is a sand which and a glass of milk.
I turn and reach up and kiss his cheek... "We will continue this..." I lean and kiss his lips... "Later..." And I kiss his other cheek.
**But we all know good things dont last..."