I Love(d) You (Once)
Chapter Twenty: My Dear, I Don't Give A-
2205
To: Astoria
From: Draco
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We need to talk about something important. Orange teahouse, please meet me at 11am tomorrow.
- MESSAGE END -
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0743
To: Draco
From: Astoria
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I'll meet you at the entrance.
- MESSAGE END -
Draco stared at the expressive faces of the other patrons at the teahouse –sipping their tea from thin, delicate china, leaning forward to reach for a scone—it only served show how inactive he and Astoria stood. Witches and wizards brewed potions and pointed wands against themselves; Muggles chopped, cranked and carved to achieve what they were. Astoria and Draco both of cadaverous complexion, were a pair of statues posing in a garden.
"How do you like this place?" asked Astoria.
"Dashing," he said mutedly. And it was. The opulence surrounding them was as clear as the water gushing off the edge of the balcony, which fell and collected into a large pool on the ground floor. Draco shifted the collar around his neck, now slick against his skin and lamented on his choice of attire. The temperature and humidity were set specifically for exotic flowers and plants. He was neither of those things. And here, stewing in a navy argyle sweater, he could scarcely admire the intrigue and beauty in which they sat, inside a tree house, surrounded by greenery, right down to its moss-covered walls.
"You been here before?" Draco asked.
She nodded. "A few times." That was a lie. She'd been here more than a few times. This was the place Theo had brought her for their first date and one of their local haunts since they began their relationship. It was their special place. Pansy knew and told Draco to meet me here!
Subtlety, was not Pansy's forte. (And why on earth, my dear Drakey, do you think I would use anything but a sledgehammer to smash open a walnut? Isn't life more dramatic and fun with total obliteration?)
"What was it that you wanted to tell me?" he asked. If it was a problem on his end, he could fix it, maybe. Arrogant he may be, he knew he was not a perfect person. But…
"Well I'm sure you noticed we haven't been meeting up as of late."
"Sure."
Astoria swallowed. "And I haven't been answering your calls and text messages. For weeks."
"Yes. After I found out you were still alive from Pansy, I stopped calling, and I stopped messaging you daily."
She looked up at Draco and nodded, trying to see whether he was getting what she was implying. He nodded back at her, blank-faced, totally refusing to see where the flow of the conversation was headed.
So commenced the "polite" way to break up part II (Part I being fading out). Breaking up via implication and inference.
"So, uh… what do you think this means?"
"That you wanted to be alone."
"Yes," she said. "And what else?"
Draco frowned. "Look, did I do something wrong?"
"No, you didn't do anything wrong. It's just that I don't think we should see each other anymore. At all."
A lightbulb flickered. "Right," he said. He looked down at his teacup. He was no connoisseur in breakups, but the way this was going was less palatable than he had fathomed. Something was off… and then his thoughts had screeched to a blind halt. Astoria looked pained and had turned so pale, she looked almost blue. "Are you perhaps…" (and her heart raced twice its resting rate) "ill?"
"What?"
"Terminally. Ill." He scrunched his face and shook his head with large, swinging motions. "That's something reserved for terrible romantic-comedies, not life."
"Are you trying to be… funny?" Astoria asked, feeling as though her soul had just detached itself from her body from the sheer absurdity of his comment. "In a situation like this?"
"No," he said, dead-panned. "If you are terminally ill, we can work through this. With the new healthcare policies the Ministry have in place, as long as it's not a rare condition we won't even have to clean out your trust fund to make your passing easy."
"What are you talking about?" Astoria said, exasperated. "I'm not ill, I am just…"
"Playing stupid… just like I was right now. Doesn't feel nice to be treated that way, right?" He took a sip of tea, but when he put down his cup he used more force than he anticipated. The ceramic cup crashed into its matching saucer plate. The motion caused some of the tea to spill out of the cup and it splashed over his fingers.
"Obviously there are two situations here." He wiped his hands with a napkin beside him in precise and harsh motions. Draco gave her a measured look with his stormy grey eyes clouded with fatigue. "Either you are telling the truth or you are not. I am inclined with the latter. Why? Well, if it just a problem with you, in which you meant you felt we were incompatible, then we would have stopped dating, for real. End of story."
"Yes that's what I'm doing—"
"You are lying, and this is why I know," Draco said. "You forgot your obvious motive for consorting with me in the first place. Yes, it was quite a while ago, but don't think I forgot. We began as a farce, because of your mother. If it were merely about incompatibility, we would have broken up privately, but continued as a couple in the public's eye. Yes, I like you, but we were not at a stage where we were particularly attached for it to be awkward to return to being a sham couple. And I am not about to be persuaded you would decide to stop meeting with me in any capacity because you found out something disagreeable in my personality. The benefits of pretending to be in a relationship with me greatly outweigh any… flaws I might have." Draco quirked one of his eyebrows, daring Astoria to disagree.
Astoria shifted her head down, breaking their eye contact. She didn't like feeling so exposed.
"And since you wanted me to infer and not tell me clearly you wanted the relationship to be over, let me infer for you, something else. The reason for this, would be that you found someone else. But I am unwilling to believe, there is someone new that could sway your good judgement so much so you would be willing to leave them for me. So tell me, when did Nott resurrect from the dead?"
And in that instance, Astoria thought: this was why I liked him in the first place. He was so so intelligent, and his forcefulness was always polite, and charismatic instead of overbearing and brutish… and he was right. He was the type that she would take as a husband if it were not for—"You can be my second," she blurted out.
"There are two things that start with C which have no soul to damn: corporations and cheaters. How long were you going to keep me in the dark for?"
"I…" Astoria began.
"Tell me," he said, his voice cool. Astoria pulled her hands in his, trying to find some solace in his touch. She didn't like this kind of Draco.
Draco's eyes traced the outline of Astoria's bit lip, down her neck, arm and onto her hand which rested on top of his own. He stared at it before moving his hand away. He rose from his chair, careful not to scrape the legs against the floor and walked over to the edge of the balcony. Astoria swallowed and followed Draco, afraid he might do something irrational. Draco gave a soft laugh. "Your second." Despite his laugh, his voice betrayed no levity. "Did you get hit over the head with something?"—and his voice broke—"You think, after you tried to fade me out, break up with me, admit that you were cheating on me, I would be willing to be your second and continue any semblance of a relationship with you?"
"You're wrong," she cried out. "I just needed time. I didn't want to burn any bridges with you before I decided anything. We did have something… and I… I was indecisive. Can't you understand?"
Draco snorted. They kept eye contact for a moment before Draco dropped his hands to his side and headed towards the door without another word.
"I-It's true," she said, trying to convince herself as much as him.
"Was that supposed to be any consolation? I'm Draco Malfoy," he said softly. He watched her from his seat with his hands still by his sides.
"Please, Draco. I…"
"Astoria," he said, the weight in his voice could sink a fleet of ships. "You got what you wanted. I'm the one breaking up with you. You don't even have to do the dirty deed yourself."
"You don't understand! You're making me sound horrible."
"I thought of all the reasons you had been ignoring me. The thought of you cheating had crossed my mind, sure, but I never entertained the possibility. So yes, I am at fault. It was my sincerity and my good opinion of you that allowed this charade to continue for so long. And from your actions, it appears I was the only one being sincere."
Her face froze and she resented Draco for being to see through her. "You know me so well. I was scared and you don't understand, I'm drawn to him like a magnet—you shouldn't think of me so badly. I know I didn't do what was right by you, but you know me. I did—I do like you a lot." She flushed red, having made to say those words and turned even redder when she saw the lack of reaction in his eyes. "Okay, so I deserve this. I stringed you along. I should have ended things earlier."
"I know," said Draco. He ran his fingers through his hair. "You know what? It doesn't matter anymore."
"Please don't say that," she said in a small voice.
"I did my best." He gave a harsh laugh. "Even sat through three-hours of that sleep-inducing opera. I don't speak French. Or did you forget you were going to the opera with me and not Nott?"
She felt sorry for Draco and saw how mean she'd been. It might've been the first time she felt so badly of herself. Or perhaps it was the first time she could put a face to a heart she was breaking. "I'm sorry!" she said. She knew she as in the wrong and stood up from her chair too. "I'm sorry I led you on like that. You know how I am. I have trouble and I can't let things go. That's how this all began in the first place."
"I don't want your apology. You're just sorry you were caught."
"But I am sorry," she cried. She looked up at him and tears welled up in her eyes. "How do I make you understand that? I cared about you. You know I liked you as much as you liked me!"
"Does it matter? You know, Astoria, I had my mind on your best interests. And I would have understood if you chose to be with Nott. You two have history; it's hard to beat things like that. We could have stayed as friends, but I was sincere and you were not. We can never be friends now. The more I find out what happened the more it will hurt my pride, and surely, it will only be a mockery of my own sincerity." Now was the time for his grand exeunt. He paused at the door and turned to face her one last time. "So this is it. I'm leaving and I look forward to never seeing you again. If you see me turning a corner into a street you better be running the other way."
"That is fair. But what about… the press, if they ask about what happened? What should I say? What should I do?"
Saving all the dignity he could muster for these unfortunate, multiple encounters—he couldn't call it a relationship—with Astoria, he left these parting words:
"My dear, I don't give a fuck."
And so it appears our favourite duo are both single, albeit recovering from their broken relationships. ;) Please review!