Best friends forever...
Throughout the years from 8 to 12, Christian and his young charge became closer naturally throughout that time.
He'd gained her trust after a few misunderstandings, proving himself to be no danger to her, but instead, her reliable protector, someone who guided her along and pulled her to safety.
And most importantly, above all of that, he'd begun to earn the title of someone who was regarded closely as a trusted friend to her.
..
Ana couldn't wait until class was finally over. She couldn't wait to give it to him.
It had now been a common occurrence over the years for Christian to walk her to school, then to meet her afterwards, where he would be waiting by the large trunk of a tree in the school yard, always dutifully on time at 2.45 the instance her day of school was over.
While her teacher was preoccupied with speaking to another student in class, leaning over their shoulder to ask what their drawing was of, Ana quickly used her distraction to her advantage. Biting her lip as she watched the teacher pat the shoulder of the student in praise, a girl Ana's age, over her artwork, she saw her chance and she took it.
Sliding off her chair quietly, she crept towards the window, peering out to the usual spot where her friend waited for her. She felt her heart sink the instance her blue eyes went to that trunk he often waited for her at. He was gone. He wasn't there.
Had he forgotten that he had to meet her after school today? Or was he busy somewhere else, maybe even being best friend's with another girl her age?
The thought of Christian being somewhere else, spending time with another little girl that wasn't her, it made Ana often feel funny. He liked to reassure her that she was his only friend, that he was here for her and her alone. She didn't like the idea of him sneaking off to be special friends with someone else other than her.
How come he said he was just for her if he had gone off to be friends with someone else?
Just as she was about to turn and run back to her table before the teacher caught her, feeling disheartened by his absence, she caught that flash of white from the dress shirt he often wore whenever he was around her.
Ana's heart hammered in her chest in excitement as her eyes widened while she got closer to the glass on the window, her eyes darting back to the trunk. Her lips pulled back into a happy, beaming grin, her nose almost touching the cool window glass that separated them.
To her relief, he was there now. The friend she'd had ever since she was apparently an infant.
He was standing by his usual spot near the tree now, resting an elbow against it to keep himself upright, both hands tucked deep into his trouser pockets. He always dressed in a dressy shirt and black trousers with those polished shoes of his, as if he were going to a special job interview or as if he was attending somewhere fancy. Ever since she'd first been able to set eyes on him, he still hadn't changed his clothes, not even a few years later now that Ana was 11, almost 12.
"Anastasia." She suddenly heard her teacher's voice and she turned away from the window, swallowing nervously. Her teacher had caught her; Both hands were resting on her teachers hips as she stared at Ana, a displeased look on her face. Ana recognized it as her teachers angry look. "Home-time isn't until another fifteen minutes."
"Yes, Mrs Andrews," Ana chanted, skipping back to her chair hastily.
She looked her drawing over carefully, wondering if Christian would like it. Would it be colorful enough for him? Would he keep it or think it's silly?
Deciding the picture could do with more color in the background, Ana picked up the blue and green pencils, beginning to color in more of the background outlined carefully.
"Wow, I like your picture, Ana," Mrs Andrews suddenly said from behind her and Ana gasped in panic.
She had been concentrating so hard on getting the colors right that she hadn't noticed the female teacher standing behind her. A sudden impulse made Ana want to cover the picture with her hand, to throw it away even. She felt protective of it for some reason; Like she wanted only Christian to see it, not anyone else.
"It's very detailed," Mrs Andrews went on and Ana caught out of the corner of her eye as the teacher sank down beside her, looking at it. "Who's this supposed to be?" she asked next, and she even tapped her forefinger against the picture of the man that was supposed to be Christian.
"He's, um, a best friend," Ana murmured, feeling shy.
"Oh, a best friend, huh?" Sometimes it annoyed her, the way Mrs Andrews spoke. Sometimes she felt like Mrs Andrews talked as if she was too much of a kid. Christian didn't do that; He always treated Ana like she was his age and never made his voice sound funny when he talked to her. "Well, it's very good. Your getting so good at drawing."
To her relief, the bell went and Mrs Andrews got to her feet.
"OK, class is finished now. I'll see you all tomorrow."
Hurriedly sliding out of the chair and stowing all the pencils away on the desk, Ana grabbed the picture she drew, wanting to give it to Christian as a gift. She'd never given him anything before. He'd always be there for her, waiting in the mornings to walk her to school or to walk her home afterwards.
He'd always happily help her with her homework and her spelling and times table while her Mom was busy cooking dinner. And he'd always tell her stories so that she could fall asleep when she didn't feel tired enough to fall asleep on her own. But she'd never given him anything to say how much she'd appreciated him before.
She grabbed her bag off the hook and made sure it was properly zipped up while holding the piece of paper carefully. She didn't want to accidentally ruin it by crinkling it or tearing it.
As she followed the other loud students in her grade outside, she ran immediately past the steps to where Christian was, still leaning against the large old trunk of the tree, waiting for her. She felt sort of shy and warm when he leaned off the tree, smiling down at her. Suddenly she wasn't so sure she wanted to give him her drawing or not.
"Hello, Anastasia. How was your day at school?"
"It was OK." She hesitated, biting down on her lip nervously as she squinted down at the piece of paper she was carefully holding between her short fingers. What if he didn't like it? What if he thought it was a stupid drawing? "Um, I... I have something for you," she finally muttered, lifting her chin higher in the air to meet his gaze. "I... I did it in class."
When he knelt down beside her, his gaze focused on nothing else but her face curiously, Ana felt that funny feeling in her stomach again. She found she couldn't look him in the eye, as if he was an unknown stranger to her all over again, and not the man that had become something of a close friend to her throughout the years. If he didn't like the picture, she knew she'd be devastated.
"Oh, what is it? Can I see?"
A nervous giggle came from her mouth as she finally handed him over the picture. She felt as if she wanted to shy away and hide when she glanced up quickly to see he was inspecting her drawing carefully with his grey eyes while he held the paper carefully in his hands.
"You did this?" When she peeked up again, he was looking at her, his eyebrows raised. He looked impressed.
"Uh-huh," she whispered proudly, and his question gave Ana the confidence she needed to lift her chin higher, to hold his gaze boldly. "It's supposed to be you and me."
"I thought so. It's amazing, Ana."
Amazing. He thought it was amazing. She felt her lips pull back into a large, beaming smile at his comment. Her cheeks began to ache, she was smiling so hard. "You really think its amazing?" she asked uncertainly. "So you really, um, like it?"
"I more than like it, Ana. I love it."
Love? She didn't think it was possible to smile even harder than she did then. "You love it?" she repeated, her eyes widening as her voice shook with happiness.
"That's right. I love it."
"Love is big!" She knew that if someone liked something, they just only liked it. But to love it, that meant it was so much more special and that it meant more than just to like it. "You can keep it if you want, too?" She felt her hands shaking with eagerness as she pointed at the picture he was still holding. "I only did it for you!"
"I think I will keep it." She giggled again when Christian folded the drawing carefully, only to slip it into the outside breast pocket of his white dress shirt. "I'll keep it in here with me." He patted his hand over the pocket. "Always."
His reaction to her drawing was even better than Ana had imagined.
She'd been nervous all afternoon, worrying he'd probably think it was a silly drawing or that, worst case scenario, he'd make fun of her. But to her relief, he'd gone one better; He didn't just like the drawing, he actually loved it, and to love something was huge! And he was keeping it! He put it in his pocket so he would have it with him always!
"You want to know why I chose to draw us?" Ana went on, still smiling painfully wide. His reaction was even better than getting rewarded an extra bowl of ice cream by her mom.
"Why did you?"
That funny feeling knotting her stomach came again as Ana pressed her lips together nervously. "Because you're..." She'd never said it out loud to him before, and she hesitated. It was too hard to say it when Christian was kneeling beside her, watching her face as she struggled to let it out and express it to him. So instead, she gestured for him to come closer. "It... it's a secret," she whispered, purposefully lowering her voice. "Only something you can hear. But you can't tell anyone, OK?"
"OK, I promise not to tell anyone," Christian agreed.
She giggled again quietly when Christian played along, shuffling closer towards her with his polished shoes. Once he was near enough to her, Ana giggled again anxiously while cupping her small hand over his ear, then she leaned forward to whisper it excitedly, a secret just between them.
It had been the first time Christian had seen his young charge truly act almost coy and nervous around him. Usually, Anastasia was so mischievous, so cheeky and inquisitive with asking him questions non-stop, always eager to learn.
He hadn't been expecting what she was about to whisper in his ear, her supposed secret just for him. When he leaned closer with his head tilted to the side as she cupped her small hand over his ear, and as she stood closer and bent in with her mouth, a rush of air tickled his earlobe as she burst out giggling again, the endearing shyness of the sound of it making his heart warm.
Then Ana had at last whispered, beneath her breath, "Because you're my most favorite person in the whole entire world," and he felt his heart swell at his young charge's sweet words.
"Hmm," he hummed as he digested her whispered words in thoughtfully. Then Christian moved until he held his hand up to her ear, whispering his words back to her, though without the shyness or embarrassment that his young charge had felt to say it. "That's funny, because you're my favorite person as well."
He tried not to laugh at her reaction when Ana leaned back to look at him, her eyes wide, her mouth hanging halfway open in shock. "Really?" she'd gasped, her voice high-pitched in disbelief. "And I'm yours?" Then one of her giggles erupted from her again as she covered her mouth with both hands, as if his returned confession was all too much for her.
Being assigned Anastasia Steele as his charge had become a lot more rewarding than he realized it would be, it occurred to Christian then. Yes, there were times where it was incredibly challenging when Ana would deliberately disobey him, as any child her age really does. But there were moments like this, heartwarming moments, that made him look past all of the other stuff.
"Come on," he urged her, trying to make her feel better while getting to his feet. "We better start walking home otherwise you'll scare your mother for being home too late." Ana stood and he touched her back, helping her along beside him.
"Goodbye, Anastasia," he heard a woman call, and they both turned back together to see a lady waving that must have been Ana's teacher.
"That's Mrs Andrews," Ana explained as they walked together, her backpack bopping up and down on her shoulder. "I don't know if I like her very much though. Sometimes I feel like she doesn't like me either."
"I'm sure that isn't true," Christian assured her, watching Ana turn back to wave at the teacher one last time.
"She can't see you?" Ana pointed out, frowning as she glanced far up at him.
"No. She can't."
"How come no one else can see you but me?"
It was a difficult question for Christian to explain. He hadn't quite known the complete mechanics of it himself. He sighed while running his fingers through his hair, shaking his head. "I'm not sure, Ana. I suppose, in the way I like to think of it, is that the reason no one else can see me but you is because I'm only here for you, I'm for you."
"But where do you go when you aren't with me?" she asked him, scrunching up her nose. "Like... when you aren't in school with me? Do you go somewhere else?"
"No, I'm always here. I'm always here waiting for you in case you need me."
"But do you go see other boys and girls?" The tone of her voice when she asked the question confused him. She sounded upset by the idea.
"No, I don't, Ana. There's only you."
"But why?" Christian was thankful that he'd gotten used to Ana's incessant questioning. He sometimes felt he was under examination or interrogation when around her.
"Because we only get assigned to one human. You're my human." He could see she was about to walk out on the street without looking, and he grabbed her by the arm, pulling her back. As it turned out, she had done it on purpose to see if he was paying attention. When he'd glanced down at her reproachfully, he caught Ana staring up at him with mischievous eyes. "You should take this more seriously," he scolded her, glancing both ways. Then once he saw they were clear to walk, he pushed her forward and walked with her across the road.
"Take what seriously?" Ana asked, repeating him like a parrot.
"You know what." As they reached across the road, he almost felt like he had come right out of his skin when Ana's shoe got caught on the step in the pavement. "Careful" he cried out at once.
She stumbled forward and he caught her before she could trip over and seriously hurt herself, a sigh escaping through his mouth as he righted her with both hands around her waist. He heard her small laugh as she spun around in time for him to notice she was grinning up at him.
"Gotcha!" she exclaimed, before she giggled, her eyes twinkling naughtily. "You thought I was seriously gonna trip over and fall, didn't you?"
Apparently it had all been some sort of deliberate trick, with Ana pretending to get her shoe caught. Christian shook his head while running his hand through his hair, irritation making him frown. He heard her splutter into more giggles and he tried to refrain from smiling himself, with not wanting to encourage her. Sometimes his young charge really liked to push him. He wondered if she could tell how seriously he took this, how seriously he fretted whenever it seemed she was close to hurting herself.
"Anastasia, that wasn't funny," he muttered in annoyance when she looked very proud of herself. "My whole purpose in being here is to protect you. I don't appreciate you making fun of me."
Even although her face had turned away from him and they had started walking again, he could see the very telling sign of her cheek being lifted, which meant that she was still struggling not to laugh.
"So other boys and girls have someone like you, too?" she asked once her cheekiness had died down. He almost growled in relief.
"They do. All the boys and girls at your school do."
"How come I can't see them?"
"Just for the very same reason that they can't see me," he explained. "Only the boys and girls can see who they're assigned to, though... I'm not sure if they're capable of seeing them like you can with me." He was not sure if other boys and girls at her school were enlightened to their guardian angels presences around them. The fact that Ana was still seeing him, even now at this age... he had not heard of such a phenomena occurring before. "There are notified instances of children like you, when you're 5 or 6 not being able to see me anymore. You lose... the ability to see after a while."
"But I'm pretty much close to 12 and I can still see you?" Yes, and that was why it was so bizarre. Ana could still see him, even now, when usually, it was common for children to stop seeing their guardian angels after the ages of 5. He often wondered why it was so himself, how Ana could still see him. He put it down to it being some unique and inexplicable bond they had.
"I know. I'm not sure what it means."
"So..." Ana faltered with her steps, peering up to look at him thoughtfully, "Does that mean that, whenever it happens, I could stop seeing you at any time?" He caught the edge of fear in her voice and when he blinked back down at her, he saw sadness in her bright blue eyes.
He wondered if he ought to keep it to himself, but then decided being untruthful was not right. It would only hurt her even more. It would be better that she were prepared for it.
"Unfortunately yes. It's always a possibility."
"B-but what if I don't ever want you to go?" she asked loudly, her voice like a whine, a sad outburst. "What if I don't want to ever stop seeing you, because you're my favoritest person in the world?"
Christian suddenly wished he hadn't spoken about it to her after all. He sighed loudly when he noticed a sheen of wetness building in her sad, wide eyes. "I won't want to go either, Ana," he assured her gently. "But you should know that there's always a chance of it happening."
"When?"
"I'm not sure. I don't have a specific time or date. We should just always prepare ourselves for the likelihood of that happening."
He almost felt his heart cry out in pain when he glanced at Ana again, only to see her sniffling gently. He'd seen Ana cry every now and then, of course, but... not due to anything he had done or said. He stared down at her, astonished when tears trickled down her cheeks, her lips mashed together as she sobbed. For the first time, he felt like an utter ass. A complete cruel, and wicked person for making her cry.
Without thinking, he got down on his knees beside her, trying to comfort her. He noticed she wouldn't look at him, as though she was embarrassed about her tears or she was perhaps just too hurt to.
"Ana, I'm sorry," he whispered softly, and he hesitated before reaching over, putting his arm around her small shoulders gently. "I didn't mean to make you upset by talking about this." He focused on sending soothing, happy feelings onto her.
And then, next thing he knew, she was crumbling while shoving her arms around him, her small face hiding into the collar of his shirt as she cried heart brokenly. Something hard and rough built in his throat and Christian realized he felt like crying along with her guiltily for making his small charge cry.
"Ssh, I'm still here," he soothed when she shook against him. "I'm still here right now, Ana."
He felt her tears soaking through the fabric of his shirt as he touched the back of her hair, stroking it gently.
"But... but you're my best and only friend?" He heard her whimper and splutter brokenly into his shirt, her voice muffled.
"As you are mine," he whispered back to her, rubbing her back gently while his other hand, he cradled her head, patting it.
"Best friends forever?"
"Of course," he promised. "Forever. But don't worry, there will be other friends. Realer friends that everyone can see, too." He was confident it wouldn't only be just her and him for long. Soon, Ana would make more friends once she felt more confident at school.
And, no doubt, once she was far older, she'd be having more than just friends hanging around her as well. Christian felt an odd tight shifting sensation in his stomach at the thought of Ana older, in her much older teens, beginning to date and having a boy hanging off her arm.
What was the appropriate course of action for a man, like him, when his charge began dating boys or experimenting with the opposite sex? While he'd always felt prepared and ready to be assigned a human, there were still so many unanswered things he did not know.
Suddenly Christian wished he had spoken to some of the counsel elders while he had the chance to. With their knowledge and experience, they could have freely explained to him his role in the inevitable charge's rite of passage where dating and sexual experimentation was concerned.
He shook his head to ward off these sudden questions that perplexed him. Ana was young still, and all of that, it was years and years away. Why was he concerning himself over these questions now when he ought to be entirely focused on comforting the child and erasing her fears as expected of him?
Sensing her hurt slowly evaporating, he heard her sniffle once more before she leaned back, hastily wiping the tears off her face with her small hands. Her cheeks were streaked with tears, her eyes rimmed red. "Are you going to be all right?" he asked with concern, and she nodded once with a forced, small smile, sniffling again as she moved away from him.
"I...I'm OK now," she whispered slowly in a small voice.
Seeing that she was better now, Christian stood as well, slowly following after his charge as she began walking the route towards home again. "Good girl."
thank you so much for inspiring me to write, it always helps to know what you all think of the story so far. :) this is basically just touching on Ana and Christian during her childhood, I think next chapter we'll be getting to her being older. this is inspired by City of Angels and, as some of you point out, that wasn't a very happy ending. this story will be as i'm a sucker for romance and especially christian and ana as a pairing, it may just take a bit to get there :) also loosely inspired by Sunday's at Tiffany's and Drop Dead Fred (the whole 'imaginary friend'/angel thing).
please do keep letting me know your thoughts and sharing them.