Once Upon a Hogwarts-Chapter Eight
By Lily in a Pond
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, but somebody does. And that somebody is really making me twitch with anticipation of the seventh book……….
0o0
"Move."
"Move."
"Move."
"Excuse me," Morag MacDougal said politely to a Gryffindor, who gave him the evil eye when she noticed the Slytherin badge on his robes.
Blaise Zabini, Theodore Nott, Pansy Parkinson, and Morag MacDougal pushed through the crowd queuing up for Hogsmeade, with the exception of the latter, of course.
"Move."
"Move."
"Move."
"Excuse me, pardon me, coming through," Morag was saying as he attempted to squeeze through a group of Hufflepuffs.
"Why – do – you – guys – always – walk – so – fast?" Morag panted out when he finally caught up to Pansy, Blaise, and Theo, who were previously way ahead of him.
Blaise looked surprised. 'We don't. Everyone else simply moves for us and we pass through. You, on the other hand, are so polite that you wouldn't even think of pushing through with saying 'excuse me'."
"He's right," Pansy joined in. "You're always polite and nice. Too nice," she concluded after a moment of thinking. "Even to the Gryffindors and Hufflepuffs."
"There's nothing wrong with being nice," Morag protested. "It's just something that your parents teach you when you're young."
"Unfortunately for Pansy here, her parents were never around when she was young, so she was usually at Draco's house," said Theo, in a bored tone. "And as you know, Draco's parents aren't very nice. At least not his father."
Morag nodded. He had seen Draco's father once. Just the simple sight of him had partially paralyzed him with fear, enabling him motionless for a few seconds. Of course, Morag had seen Draco's father in Knockturn Alley at night, which made it seem all the more scarier.
"Anyways, here we are," Blaise was saying as they saw the familiar shops and streets of Hogsmeade.
"I can't wait to get a dress!" Pansy squealed. "Do you think I should wear sapphire or aqua?"
"Does it matter?" asked Theo in an exasperated tone. "Whatever color it is, it's still blue! Ravenclaw blue!"
Pansy looked deeply affronted. "Well," she said with an arrogant sniff and started walking away. "Be all hissy for all I care. At least I have a boyfriend."
"Fine!" Theo yelled back. "And I don't care if you have a boyfriend! I'm going to get my own soon!"
Everyone in the street stopped and looked at Theo.
Blaise tapped Theo on the shoulder. "Uh, you do realize what you just said, right?"
"Yeah, yeah, very funny," Theo snapped, looking peeved. "Theodore Nott is gay, ha-ha-ha. Now go back to whatever you were doing or I'll Avada you all!"
Theo put on his most menacing face (courtesy of lessons from Lucius Malfoy), and snarled, "Now."
Everyone quickly scurried away.
Morag looked mildly surprised. "That sure is something I'll remember once I'm out of Hogwarts."
A boy from Hufflepuff stepped up to Theo. "I'd like to congratulate you for coming out of the closet, buddy," he said, coming very close. Behind Theo, Blaise and Morag started cackling like madmen, holding on to each other for support. "And if you're interested in joining our club, it meets at –"
"Look, buddy," Theo said sarcastically. "If you want to keep your private parts, you'd do best to get out of my way."
Then with a swish of robes to rival Professor Snape's, Theo swept down the street, Blaise and Morag following closely behind.
The Hufflepuff looked dazed. "He talked to me," he breathed over and over again. "Theodore Edmund Nott talked to me."
0o0
Meanwhile, down the street, Ginny and Hermione were rolling over with laughter while Harry and Ron, who had just come out of Honeydukes', stared at them.
"What do you think caused this?" Harry whispered to Ron.
"Dunno," Ron whispered back. "Maybe something in the juice this morning?"
"Ron!" Harry said indignantly. "I drank the juice this morning!"
"Oh. Sorry, mate."
"Well, we'll be heading off," Ron announced loudly to Hermione and Ginny, seeing as now, they could at least stand upright.
"We need to get our dress robes at Madam Malkin's," said Harry. "Er, bye!"
As soon as the boys' shadows had turned the corner, Hermione and Ginny stopped laughing at once.
"Nice acting," Ginny commented to Hermione.
"Same to you. I can't believe they fell for it!" Hermione exclaimed, stepping into the new fancy occasion store for ladies, One Magical Night. "They are so thick, they can't even figure out when someone is trying to ditch them when those people are right in front of them."
"Even though Harry is so sweet and caring, I have to admit, he's a bit slow on the uptake," Ginny said, following her. "And Ron, well I won't even start on him! God knows the gene fairy skipped out on him for the Weasley craftiness."
"The same kind you, Fred, and George have?" Hermione asked. She didn't even bother to say anything about Percy.
"Yeah."
As they closed the door behind them and took their first look around, Hermione and Ginny were rendered completely speechless.
There were dresses of every kind, every length, every color, every style, every fabric, every design, everything a girl could want for a dance.
"Wicked," Hermione and Ginny breathed at the same time.
In front of them, Lavender Brown and Parvati Patil were having the same thoughts.
Even Mandy Brocklehurst and Pansy Parkinson, who had just walked in, the two girls at Hogwarts who always had something mean or cynical or sarcastic to say, were silent.
Lavender broke the silence. "If this is heaven, then somebody give me a dagger!"
After this, the other girls started talking too about the beautiful dresses.
"Aren't you glad we ditched Harry and Ron, Hermione?" Ginny asked, but Hermione wasn't listening. Hermione was busy pulling out a large planner with various tabs of different colors sticking out the sides.
"Ginny, I made a list last night organizing the kinds and colors of dresses we should have, put them in files, and did some cross-referencing. And also –"
Ginny's eyebrows were raised almost to her forehead. "Hermione, who does this?"
"...Me..."
"C'mon, I'll show you the real fun of shopping. The only way you'll get something good is to follow Ginny's tips." Ginny reached into her cloak and pulled out a notebook. "What?" she protested. "You're not the only one who does this!"
"Anyways, here's Ginny's guide to shopping for the perfect dress."
Hermione flipped it open and read:
Part 1: So You Want a Dress
Step 1: First see if you have short or long legs. If you have short legs, do NOT wear a short dress or a dress showing any part of the leg at all. Long legs, lucky girls, you can wear any length of dress. Just remember, keep it PG-13.
Step 2: Second, choose your hair color for this event. Below is a color chart defining what color would look good with your hair. NOTE: If you have hair in a halfway color, do me and yourself a favor and consult Lavender Brown's chart, which is more complicated in subcategories than mine.
"Lavender has this too?" Hermione asked in disbelief.
Ginny shrugged. "Keep on reading."
Hermione looked down and saw an elaborate color chart with little squares of colors and fabrics at its sides that changed subtopics (brown, blond, red, black) every ten seconds. Wow, she thought. Where do these people even get these spells?
Step 3: Now that we have established the basic rules, track your calendar and see if you are to be having your 'monthlies' during this event. If so, do NOT wear any light or white material, such as a piece of gauze. YOU WILL MOST LIKELY BE EMBARRESSED OUT OF YOUR MIND IN PUBLIC AND NEVER LIVE IT DOWN. Of course, if you still want to, you're free to. Just make sure you put in –
Hermione slammed the notebook shut. "Ginny!"
Ginny had the tendency to blush and look down.
"Why, why, why, would you write this rubbish?"
"Hey, it's not rubbish!" Ginny protested. "It's really helpful!"
"To who? Girls who are menstruating out of their minds?" Hermione yelled. The whole fell silent after this. "That was really loud, wasn't it……?" She trailed off, blushing.
Ginny shook her head. "What a day. First Nott, then Hermione."
0o0
"So, where do you want to go?" Daphne Greengrass asked Draco, who was desperately mouthing, 'help me' to Blaise Zabini, currently shaking his head and laughing at Draco.
Draco's head snapped back. "Er….sorry…..didn't quite catch that bit, Daphne."
"I said, where do you want to go," Daphne repeated, looking a little annoyed that Draco wasn't listening to her.
"Oh, anywhere you chose is fine," Draco replied.
Daphne grinned. "This is going to be so fun!" she squealed. "C'mon, we're going to the new dress shop that's just opened up!"
Draco looked over his shoulder and made a strangling motion to Blaise, who immediately cracked up, holding onto the 'Hogsmeade' sign for support.
Behind them, Ernie Macmillan and Justin Finch-Fletchey grinned. This is the perfect time to strike.
Ernie and Justin quickly followed Draco and Daphne. But as they reached the door, and Ernie grasped the doorknob, they immediately were thrown back.
The store clerk poked her head out. "I'm really sorry guys, but we placed an Repelling Charm aiming for the boys without a girl."
"Why would you do that?" Justin groaned, rubbing his shoulder.
"You really want to know?" the clerk asked, eyebrows raised.
"No," said Justin, at the same time as Ernie, who said "Yes."
"Too many Peeping Toms," the store clerk replied dryly. "Whoever did the Repelling Charms on the dressing rooms sure screwed it up."
"Ugh," Ernie and Justin groaned at the same time, looking disgusted.
"Ten sickles says one of the Peeping Toms was Seamus Finnegan," said Justin.
"There is no way I'm taking that bet; you and I both know that Seamus has to be crazy to not do it."
"Hey!" Hannah Abbott said above them, peering down into their faces. "Why are you on the ground?"
"The stupid store chucked us out," Ernie replied sourly, remembering his bruise.
"What did you do to get thrown out?" asked Susan Bones, appearing next to Hannah.
"Apparently, we were born with a peni – "
"Ah! I get it!" Susan said hastily.
"Hey, why don't you guys go in with us?" asked Justin, pointing to the store.
"Why?"
"Malfoy and Hermione are both in there. And because the store lets boys in if they're with a girl."
Hannah raised her eyebrows. "Sounds like a really cracked up store."
"Oh well, we have time," Susan said, picking up her bags. "We'll go in with you."
"Thanks," replied Justin. He tried to get up. "Uh, a little help here?"
Susan and Hannah rolled their eyes, but dragged each boy up anyway.
0o0
"Alright, act natural, guys," Ernie whispered. "Be cool."
He opened the door easily and sauntered in, whistling. And immediately tripped over a rug.
"I'm learning loads about being cool," Hannah said sarcastically.
"Okay, let's split up," Susan said, after she and the others had dragged Ernie up. "Girls to Hermione, guys to Malfoy."
"Roger," Justin replied.
"You're losing it," Ernie told him. "I'm Ernie. Ernie."
Justin rolled his eyes. "I know."
At the other side of the shop……………
"Hermione!" Hannah exclaimed superficially. "So good to see you!"
"And Ginny!" Susan squealed just as loudly and obnoxiously as Hannah. "It's been so long!"
Ginny looked suspiciously at the two of them, then nodded slowly and said with a huge grin, "What a coincidence that we're all here! All the girls in your year happen to be in the same shop at the same time!" She threw up her hands. "What are the chances!"
"Hermione, these would look so ravishing on you!" Susan said, grabbing a load of dresses from the rack and practically shoving it into Hermione's arms. "Here, why don't you go and try them on!"
"I don't want to try them on – " protested Hermione as the three girls shoved her towards the dressing rooms.
"Ta-ta!" they sang as Susan finished looking the door.
Ginny immediately turned around and said sharply, "L.T.E.A.?" which was their name for the Love Thy Enemy Association, made up of conspirtors working together for a most noble cause: Bring Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger together.
"Yup."
"Let's get it started."
Meanwhile……….
"So Malfoy, waiting for your girlfriend?" Ernie asked casually, leaning against a wall.
Malfoy looked at him and Justin suspiciously.
"What do you want?"
Ernie sighed dramatically. "The only thing I want is to correct my mistakes in the past, and the only way to do so is by being in this shop, waiting for a most noble and brave lady to come out of the dressing room and steal my heart away again!" He sighed again. "But alas, thy true love may not love me ever again, for I have committed a most grave mistake three years ago, and still have not resolved it. And woe is me, for I will be suffering the utmost pain of not being with my lady love."
Malfoy blinked.
"And on that night in which a great and terrible mistake was made, my masked lady was unjustly substituted with a spinster as cruel and cold as ice. Forsooth, I have now come back to reclaim my honor and unmask thy true love…….," Ernie finished dramatically, placing his hand over his heart and sinking down onto the floor.
And almost as if on cue, Hermione walked out of the dressing room, looking like a goddess in the silver dress she was wearing.
Malfoy's eyes popped wide open.
"And setting all differences aside, I must now go and surrender myself to thy lady love, for life without her is not life at all," Ernie said, suddenly springing up.
Malfoy's eyes widened even more as he realized that the girl in the silver dress talking to the clerk wasn't Daphne after all. It was Hermione.
Daphne came out of another dressing room and snatched up her handbag. "Come on Drakey, this shop is filthily polluted with Mudbloods. Let's go."
As Daphne dragged Malfoy out of the shop by the hand, Ernie finished his monologue.
"To thy fair lady love, in time and space will we be forever reunited and all mistakes forgotten as I shall finally realize that thy masked lady is thy enemy."
"Amen," Justin commented. "And love thy enemy, oh great Dragon, for that is the love of fairy tales come true."
Next to him, Susan, Hannah, and Ginny applauded him and Ernie enthusiastically.
0o0
A/N- Whew, that was longer than I expected! Probably should have cut off some of the dialogue…….
Anyways, here are the answers to the questions and statements my wonderful reviewers have asked and said…
White-Pink-Fluffy-Strawberriez – Thank you, I find that I'm getting better and better at writing cliffies (though this chapter didn't have one). And the betrayer? Well, you'll have to wait and see in Chapter Nine! NOTE: The betrayer will be someone you've heard of and someone you haven't.
Anticlownperson – Thank you, I rather enjoyed writing the carrot bit, BTW, the carrot is coming back in Chapter Nine, targeting innocent Ravenclaws. (Well, not so innocent in Mandy's case, but still). Oh, and fell sorry for Draco and Hermione. They're gonna need it. (Cackles evilly) And Daphne isn't really alluring or anything. The only two guys that like her are Draco, who doesn't really love her, and Theo, who is pretty much cracked up as you can get (check how many times I've mentioned 'maniac', 'crazy', and 'Theo' in the same sentence). I have to congratulate him too. What a plot he's dreamed up! (sniggers in background) And don't worry, all the good characters will indeed have their happy ending……..or will they? MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
KyottNShort – Well, that's what you get when you're the 50th reviewer! I guess some of the relationships are pretty shocking, but when you look at them closely and think of their common personalities, actions, likes and dislikes, etc., some of them won't look too shocking anymore. Thanks, writing the finger fight and the carrot bit was fun. I got the idea for the finger fight from my friend and I. We had a pencil fight last week (silently) in math class. Ahh yes, the carrot replies. Keep a lookout for those…..I just might give major hints to some of the minor characters with that……
Dragoneyes5000 – Did I mention that Luna is a Seer in my story?
Pinkicing101 – The way I'm writing it, he'll be more surprised and shocked than disgusted……more likely he'll be disgusted at Daphne.
Love Hope Joy – Hmm, the carrot bit and the ten fingers fight sure is getting popular….and of course I keep people in character! They're my MINIONS!
Additional thanks to absolutelyjoyful AKA Joy, Setsuna-chan09, and Natural-181.
See you in a week,
Lily in a Pond