Disclaimer: Everything you can recognize from Harry Potter belongs to J. K. Rowling. :)
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The Founding of Pigwarts II – Cooking Chaos
Chapter 4: How To ACTUALLY Found A School
"No?" Daphne ventured after quarter of an hour had passed while staring at the journal on the table, looking around in the café, gazing out of the window at people hurrying past them, once in a while making an utterly thoughtful face, and listening to the two girls at another table discussing whether orange would ever be the new black and if it was appropriate to wear sea green eye shadow with teal nail polish.
"Let's start at the beginning," Ginny suggested. "Perhaps it helps."
"In the beginning… there was an egg. After that, the chicken was born. Then came Crabbe and ate it. The end."
"Please tell me it's not another one of Draco's poems?"
"Nope. There's no Harry Potter dying there. You can always tell by that."
"So," Ginny said, and paused, trying to figure out what she should say next. "So, we have the name."
"That we do. Pigwarts. It sounds rather cool, me thinks."
"So we have the name. Do we have to do something with it?"
"Of course we have to! We have to make it famous! In secret, of course. Erm… Perhaps later. But we need the school's logo – with its name, and the names and colours and animals of the houses. We need a big name plate to hang above the front door in the future."
"We need to register the school within Ministry," Ginny added.
"I'll do it!" Daphne offered at once.
"You have good connections there? I have some, too, actually."
"No, no, I'll manage. You could try to design the logo, and the name plate, if you want to."
"Sure."
"Great."
"Wonderful."
"Erm… should we go and do that, or discuss some more?"
"Let's discuss. This chocolate cake is divine. I want another piece."
"So, what else?" Ginny asked after some more staring around, eating chocolate cake, and realizing that it was really possible to discuss the just right colour of purple lip gloss for fifteen minutes.
Daphne leafed through the journal for any clues or helpful tips.
"Teachers!" she exclaimed happily after a while.
"Oh yes," Ginny grinned. "Well, we already have two. Who else do we need to convince?"
"Besides Harry, Ron, Hermione and Draco…"
"I'll manage the Trio, you take Why-Is-There-A-Whirlpool-In-My-Ballroom Boy."
"Herbology for Neville…"
"That'll be easy. He's more or less in love with his plants. He sometimes even sleeps in his greenhouse to take care of some more fragile or lonely species. He tells them stories, too."
"Well, he's right," Daphne agreed. "Plants are good conversationalists. They really listen. And they won't yell at you when you just want to lighten things up a bit and bring some fun to the house."
Ginny rolled her eyes, even though there were times she wished she could turn Ron into a radish. Of course, there was this time she had 'accidentally' turned Ron into a cactus, but that plan backfired, since the cactus had fallen rather painfully onto her foot; later Ron had the nerve to hint that it had hurt him more, which made her turn his fork into another cactus and prove him wrong. And if Ron hadn't been so busy screaming at the top of his lungs, he might have been able to save the twins from their undeserved punishment. (Not that any punishment Fred & George got was undeserved, sometimes they just got punished for things they hadn't done instead of the things they had done).
"Susan Bones turned Colin Creevey into a squirrel?" Daphne asked with sparkling eyes and half-happy half-sad smile – happy to hear more about, sad for not being there personally to witness something so great.
"Yeah," Ginny said with a faraway smile, remembering that wonderful incident. "We had a lot of fun with him. He was still trying to take a picture in his squirrel form, and then Susan tried to throw him out of the window but he managed to escape, and we all chased him through the school. We even had a competition of sorts, five Galleons and infinite fame to whoever caught him first. Oh, all the traps we made, trying to lure him in with nuts and sweets, but in the end it was me and Harry who managed to catch him, promising him a picture of them together. I still have that photo, you know – Harry is so cute with a squirrel on his shoulder. Perhaps he should wear one on regular bases – alive, of course. Hmm, I wonder, would Colin accept the job? He kind of liked it then – said it was the best moment in his life, and drove Susan crazy afterwards with all the flowers and cards and candy to express his eternal gratitude."
"Those were times," Ginny sighed nostalgically. "Those were times."
"Hmph!" Daphne humped. "Why didn't I notice anything?"
"Well, what kind of normal… or not normal person, or squirrel, would run to dungeons when they want to escape the worst?"
"You're right," the Slytherin concurred. "I'm sure Snape used squirrel ears for something. If I think about it really hard, I seem to recall it was the main component in his shampoo."
That took Ginny a moment to reconsider.
And another moment. And one more.
"Snape used shampoo?" she asked at last, incredulously.
"Yeah, I know – rather unbelievable, isn't it?"
"Try impossible," Ginny gave a wry smile. Daphne smirked.
"You didn't like Snape much?" the Gryffindor ventured.
"No. His favouring Slytherins finally stated to get on my nerves, and since I'm a Slytherin, it's saying a lot."
Ginny smiled. She really liked Daphne.
"Who's getting Potions this time?"
"Millie. Draco's right – she does like Potions," Daphne explained. "Although, that might have been because she had a crush on Snape – impossible, I know, but Millie is known for being impossible. She might very well be the new Snape, just as evil and horrible, even though her hair isn't greasy."
"She could pour oil on her head to help with that," she suggested, very much aware that she didn't have to study under Millicent Bulstrode. Thank Merlin and everyone else who feels responsible for it!
"She can. But she can also be very frightening with clean hair. Believe me, I know."
The way she had spoken those last words, gave Ginny a shudder of horror, and new appreciation of having been a Gryffindor and escaping the destiny of sharing a dorm room with Millicent.
"What happened?" she couldn't help but ask.
"A misunderstanding. Blaise got a bit ironic and said that he thought Snape fancied Potter. He barely made it out of the way of her Fire Hex. Unfortunately, my favourite armchair didn't."
Ginny seriously regretted her question. Talking about all the EWW things, this was definitely more EWW than anything else. EWWW!
Quickly, she changed the subject.
"I suppose you talk to Millicent then. Who else is on the list?"
"Out of Slytherins, Blaise and Vinny. I'll talk to Blaise – we are like a sister and a brother to each other. Meaning, we annoy each other to hell and back. But he actually dropped in after the party and said how much he appreciated the fact that at one moment he had almost convinced his boss to give him a promotion and the next they were both underwater. Not that it matters anymore, since he is going to get a new job now. Ancient Runes – damned complicated thing. Not for us, normal people."
Ginny almost said "I think it's fascinating" simply to annoy her friend, but decided against it.
"There are worse things that Ancient Runes," she said instead. "Like Hermione trying to teach you about Ancient Runes."
"We can only hope she will be a better teacher with Arithmancy."
"I never said she was a bad teacher," Ginny grinned. "She just gets a bit demanding at times. Like this once, when I asked her this one small question about uses of bicorn horn in Potions and she clued me to a chair and told me I had to read through some ten huge books before I could get free."
"Really?" Daphne smirked.
"Yes. But luckily for me, she was a bit distracted at the time, and I managed to take the spell off after mere three hours."
"Ooh! She should have been a Slytherin."
"Better not to tell her that," Ginny warned. "Your ears might not survive it."
"I'll remember. So I'll talk to Blaise. And to Vinny as well. Unless you'd like to do it by yourself?"
"What?" the redhead asked, eyeing carefully the gleam in the other girl's eyes. "Don't tell me he had a crush on me."
"Fine. I won't. But he had."
"What's wrong with you, Slytherins? One having a crush on Snape, another on me!!"
"So you're saying you're just as bad as Snape?"
Ginny blushed. She had gone a bit awry with that logic. After all, there was nothing odd with Crabbe having a crush on her – she was beautiful, and smart, and brave, and funny, and a nice person as well. No wonder Crabbe had had a crush on her.
"All right, I'll talk to Vinny then," she agreed, her opinion of that Slytherin boy having risen more than just a couple of notches. He thought she was beautiful!
"You do that. He would love to see you. I'll take the charming Terry Boot then. I could really use a charming boy right now."
Ginny smiled a knowing smile. She was so lucky to have Harry. And, according to this new information, Crabbe.
"Luna, Dean, and Grawp still left."
"Well, that's quite a choice."
"Is it?" Daphne asked.
"Oh yes. Luna is weird. Dean is a professional Quidditch player. And Grawp is a Giant."
"I claim the Giant!" Daphne exclaimed at once, earning a suspicious glare from Ginny.
"I've always been curious about them," she explained, earning another suspicious glare from her friend.
"What?" she asked at last. "Can't a girl have interests?"
"You're weird."
"I know!" Daphne grinned. "Great, isn't it?"
"I suppose I take Luna and Dean then."
"I could talk to Luna as well. I think we might have a lot in common."
Ginny gave her friend a long contemplative look.
"I think you may be right."
"Sure I am. So, all for today?"
"Not quite. We still have the other matter to deal with."
"Which one?"
"Project Oh – Romance!"
"Leave it to me," Daphne assured. "I'll have an idea."
"What?"
"I'll let you know when the time comes," the Slytherin smirked devilishly.
Hermione and Draco were definitely going to get it now. Oh – Romance!
A/N: I once talked about purple crayon for fifteen minutes. But that's not important right now, so leave a REVIEW, ok?