In the Darkness

A Mai Otome ShizNat Story

Chapter 3

Natsuki and Youko stared at Shizuru from a distance as they talked.

"What do you think is wrong with her?" Natsuki worriedly asked in a hushed voice, "Do you think it's permanent?" Her right hand was slightly squeezing her left upper arm, feeling a little anxious.

The brunette in question was still in bed. She was awake, sitting there with nothing but a white sheet wrapped around her naked body. Her Ruby eyes were curious, were all over the place. They were staring at everything, at anything that came her way. She seemed so confused, so fragile, so... lost.

When Shizuru opened her eyes this morning, she didn't recognize anyone, didn't know where she was or why she was there.

Then and there, Natsuki thought that the universe had a strange sense of humor, that the universe was playing some sort of prank on her. When she finally tells Shizuru that she loves her, when she tells her those words she had desperately wanted to hear two years ago, her mind was not there, it was completely blank. Shizuru had woken up and didn't recognize her. She had woken up with amnesia.

"I would have to examine her further to know for sure" Youko answered, both hands resting on her waist.

She watched as the brunette suddenly stood from the bed and started to slowly walk around the infirmary, her feet were bare. "An MRI, or perhaps a PET Scan might tell us what's wrong with her brain at a molecular level. But as far as how long she'll stay like this, if it's permanent, I'm not sure" Shizuru was also looking at posters and signs, touching things here and there on the desks. She sure was curious, which was understandable given her current state.

"Shizuru-san, please don't touch that" Youko then said to the wondering brunette. She was touching very expensive glass instruments. And if she dropped them, she could easily get hurt. Could easily get cut with the sharp, fine glass.

Youko then started to make her way towards her, letting out a deep sigh in the process. The brunette was as curious as a little child.

"Come sit, Shizuru-san" She patted at the bed and watched as the 29-year-old cautiously walked towards her. "Don't worry" She softly assured her. She truly smiled to let her know she will not cause her any harm. "I promise you, we're friends"

Shizuru went ahead and crawled back into bed.

"My name is... Shizuru?" Kyoto-ben spoke, sounding a little hoarse because she hadn't spoken in so many months.

Youko softly smiled. "Yes, your name is Viola, Shizuru. And you are an Otome of Garderobe" She then gave a few more details, hoping that perhaps it could trigger her memory. Ring a bell. "You are the Third Column, and one of the most powerful and beloved Otomes in the world" Then added, "You can call me Youko"

Shizuru weakly smiled, still confused. That was a lot of information to take in. "Youko-san says that I'm a… an Otome?" And then, "What is that?" She had so many questions. That sentence that the woman had said instantly creating three more.

One: What is Garderobe?

Two: What is a Third Column?

Three: Was she really one of the most powerful and beloved Otomes in the world?

Natsuki's right hand went up to her temple, gently massaging it as she heard the conversation from afar. She had so many questions of her own and she wasn't going to get answers to any of them any time soon, not in the brunette's current condition.

"Oh, she's finally awake" Nao noticed when she had stepped into the room. "You must be happy to be getting your freak-on with Shizuru-san tonight. I bet you can't wait" She snickered with a grin on her face and then gave a suggestive stare. And then, couldn't help and laugh when she saw Natsuki's blushing face.

"W-What are you doing here anyway? Don't you have somewhere else to be?" Natsuki hissed at the young Column, both arms now down on her sides, her hands turned into tight fists.

"No, I'm exactly where I need to be" Nao narrowed her eyes at the blunette, she just loved aggravating her. And now with Shizuru back, it's like old times again. Fun times.

"So, Shizuru-san" Youko continued with her questionnaire after she had explained to Shizuru a little bit about what an Otome is, and what it is that they do. "Can you please tell me what your last memory is?"

This peaked Natsuki's interest, so she listened carefully to the woman, ignoring Nao's comments.

"My last… memory?" Kyoto-ben slowly repeated.

"Yes" Youko replied.

"As in, before this morning? Before I woke up?"

Youko nodded again, "Yes. What's the last thing you recall, Shizuru-san?"

Ruby eyes left Youko's to stare at the two other figures standing not too far away. The two figures that were staring at her curiously, waiting for her to say something.

Ruby eyes then settled on Emerald ones, and she couldn't help the rush of blood that had suddenly gone straight to her head once their eyes connected. Couldn't help the incredibly fast pace of her beating heart.

Shizuru quickly looked down, all her fingers and thumbs holding tightly to the white sheet covering her naked body, holding the sheet closely around the bosom area.

She doesn't remember anything before waking up, not a thing, but she vividly remembers the moment after she had.

That woman, the one with the long, cobalt hair, the one with those piercing, green eyes, when she had woken up this morning, that woman had kissed her on the lips.

On the lips!

She still had been a little fuzzy from her sleep. And when she had opened her eyes, that woman had said something to her, had said:

"Shizuru, I'm so glad you're awake. I missed you so much… I love you. Please don't disappear on me again"

And before she could register what was happening, she felt that woman's warm hands caressing her face. She saw as she leaned downwards towards her and pressed her soft lips against hers.

She could still feel the tingly sensation on her lips right now, could still feel it just by thinking about it.

She had quickly pushed that woman off her, pushed so hard that the woman had fallen to the ground, her green eyes wide and mouth agape, just like her.

She couldn't believe this stranger had kissed her. Just couldn't believe it.

But now that she knows she has amnesia, that they knew each other, she just couldn't help and think,

Why?

Why would she do that?

Why would she kiss her like that?

What was she to her?

What were they to one another?

These were some of the questions floating around her head, creating so much noise all morning long.

"I don't remember anything" Shizuru quickly, uncharacteristically mumbled, unable to look up and meet the questioning stares.

Youko raised an inquisitive brow. She looked at Shizuru very carefully, noticing her behavior, her extremely and very unusually reddened cheeks. Then, eyes settled on Natsuki, who had a very strange, panicky look on her face. Who had cleared her throat and had looked away, a faint blush on her face as well. As if they knew something, as if something had happened very recently between them.

And Nao, on the other hand, couldn't help and smirk, easily reading the atmosphere in the room.

"Oh my, so the Gakuenchou already tried getting frisky with Shizuru-san, eh?" She couldn't help and mutter near the blunette's ear.

"S-Shut up!" Natsuki nervously hissed at the Column. "I didn't know she didn't remember me!" Natsuki didn't mean to say that, not verbally.

The hysterical laugh produced by Nao's lips could probably be heard all over the Academy. "Kami-sama, I can't, I just can't!" She let out between laughs. Natsuki had just admitted that she had been inappropriate with Shizuru. In what way? Who knows, and who cares? All that mattered was that she was having fun. "You should see your face!"

Youko sighed at the bantering women and once again paid attention to the brunette next to her.

"Shizuru-san?" She tried again, "I really need you to try and remember"

Shizuru hesitated. She really had tried to remember. She really did. She had been trying to all morning, but nothing came to her. It was aggravating. Extremely aggravating.

And Natsuki, she ignored Nao and walked closer to Shizuru, noticing her frustration. She stopped when she was just an arm's length away.

"Shizuru" Natsuki softly said as she knelt in front of her. "Don't worry, it's okay" She went ahead and held both of her hands, softly caressing the woman's knuckles with her thumbs. "Anything you could tell us will be of big help. Anything. We're just trying to figure out what happened, where you have been all this time. You were gone for so long, Shizuru"

Ruby eyes looked into those caring, loving ones. She stared at them for a little while. She felt such a comfort, felt such an inexplicable warmth just by looking at her. By feeling Natsuki's hands caressing hers. So, she slowly gave in.

"Hai, I'll give it another try" Then, she closed her eyes and tried to calm herself, calm her heart, her mind. After a few moments of deep inhaling and exhaling, she tried to search deep inside, her eyebrows furrowing slightly in the process.

Everything was blank, she didn't have any answers. She didn't remember where she had been. Didn't remember anything about her past. But, she did remember something, remembered a feeling.

"I… I remember coldness" Shizuru whispered, feeling a little uncomfortable, her hands subconsciously caressing the blunette's. "I remember… loneliness" And then, she added, "I-I… I remember darkness… whispers and shadows and... darkness"

She swallowed and then opened her Ruby eyes to stare at the frowning blunette. It seemed that the woman did that a lot, did a lot of frowning, a lot of worrying. That's when she brought her index finger to the bridge of her nose, gently tapping her there a few times. "Stranger-han's forehead is wrinkling again" She noticed, said aloud.

And Natsuki, she couldn't help and smile because of the gesture. "You're right, it is" Shizuru used to do that a lot, used to remind her not to worry in her own way. Shizuru's memories were still in there somewhere, Natsuki knew it, she could feel it. She knew that one of these days she'll remember again. That she'll recover her memories again. It's only a matter of time.

"Kannin na, I don't seem to be of much help" The brunette then added, not for a moment leaving her stare of the woman's face. She found her beautiful, gorgeous, so alluring.

Natsuki softly smiled at her, "It's okay, Shizuru. Don't worry, you did great" She then reached up and caressed her face, forgetting that it wasn't just her and Shizuru in the room. "You'll remember soon, you'll see. It's all in there, I know it" This action that earned her another deep blush from her. That was the third one today.

"And I'm not a stranger" Natsuki softly added, hands touching the brunette's hands again. "My name is Kruger, Natsuki. You can call me Natsuki. I'm the Headmistress of this Academy"

Youko smiled as she stared at them talk, smiled at their interaction. She thought they were completely adorable. Too cute.

Too bad that adorableness would soon be interrupted by a frantic girl:

"Shizuru Onee-sama!" Arika yelled in excitement when she had reached the infirmary and saw the brunette was in fact there.

Rumors had been circulating around the Academy that Shizuru was back, that the Headmistress had found her the prior night, so she quickly headed towards the infirmary, knowing that's where she'd be.

"Shizuru Onee-sama!" Arika cried as she ran towards the brunette. She quickly shoved the Headmistress aside and jumped on the brunette, hugging her tightly. "I missed you so much Shizuru Onee-sama! So, so much!"

"A-Ara~" Shizuru let out in surprise, "Don't… Don't cry" She softly patted the girl on the head. "You're too pretty to cry, ne?" Then, when the teen smiled at her, she wiped her tears away. "Fufu, you're so Kawaii~" She caressed the teen's cheeks.

"Look at that, she's cheating on you right in front of you again" Nao took this opportunity to tease the Headmistress who just stood there with rosy cheeks and her mouth slightly agape. "And as usual, you're just going to let her do whatever she wants" She grinned at her. "She wears the pants in this relationship, uh?"

"W-What are you still doing here?!" Natsuki barked at her, aggravated. Then, stared at Arika who had yet to remove herself from the brunette, hugging her ever tighter now.

"Arika, why aren't you in class?" Natsuki tried to get their attention, but it didn't work. She then went ahead and grabbed Arika by the collar, pulling her away from Shizuru by the neck. "Give her some space, you're suffocating her" She muttered, slightly annoyed by their closeness. And also because the brunette seemed to be enjoying it.

"Fufu, it's quite alright" Shizuru added with a genuine smile. "She's really sweet" Then, said to Arika, "Kannin na to have worried you..." and then added, "I'm having a little trouble with my memory at the moment, may I ask your name?"

Natsuki watched as Shizuru patted on the teen's head again and then as she caressed her face while Arika excitedly talked to her. Emerald eyes waiting, waiting, and waiting. Waiting for Shizuru to look her direction, the way she normally did at around this time when she wanted to see her reaction. But that look, that stare, never came. Shizuru wasn't trying to tease her. Natsuki never thought she'd see the day that she'd missed her teasing.

Natsuki cleared her throat and looked away, taking a deep breath. Then, once she was calmer and the redness of her cheeks had somewhat gone, she softly suggested, "Arika, since you've decided not to go to class this morning, why don't you see Shizuru to her quarters?" When Arika nodded, she added, "Shizuru, you must be hungry, I'll pick you up in about an hour and we can have breakfast together, is that okay?"

Shizuru nodded in response as she stood from the bed.

"Arika, don't make any stops, take her straight there. Understood?" Natsuki then commanded the girl.

She wanted to hold an emergency assembly to let all the students and teachers know that Shizuru was back, but that she wasn't well. She wanted to update them on her condition so that they acted accordingly around her.

She also needed to get on the phone with the Council to let them know that Shizuru had returned. She wasn't sure how that phone call would go, since she has little information to give them regarding Shizuru's whereabouts. But, was sure they'd understand given her current condition. Anyway, whatever they thought didn't matter. Shizuru was an Otome of Garderobe. Her purpose was to serve the Founder and the school. Natsuki needn't give anyone explanations about Shizuru.

"May I have something more appropriate to wear?" Shizuru asked as she pointed to her current dress code.

"O-Oh, um, right" Natsuki then turned to Youko, and Youko stepped away for about thirty seconds. When she came back, she handed her a long, white robe and some slippers. "Really? That's all you have? Where are her clothes?"

"I'd like to keep them for a while if Shizuru-san doesn't mind" Youko replied, staring at both, Shizuru and then Natsuki. "I'd like to run some tests and see if there are any fragments or sediments on it that can tell us where Shizuru has been all this time"

Natsuki understood, then faced the brunette. "Alright, um" She swallowed and then cleared her throat, "Ahem" her cheeks reddening yet again. "Gomen, this is all we have" She whispered as she stepped closer to Shizuru, totally invading her personal space.

She saw as Shizuru then turned around, and she soon had to face away, blushing like an idiot, for Shizuru had let go of the sheet that was wrapped around her naked body. She felt as the sheet fell on the floor, part of it landing on her feet. Then, felt as Shizuru slid her hand in one sleeve, then the other. She felt as the robe left her fingers, that's when she faced in front of her again. The brunette was now fully clothed in the robe, but hadn't turned around yet, she was still tying the knot around her waist.

"Ookini" Shizuru turned around, smiling sweetly at Natsuki. A blush appeared on her cheeks when she came to the realization of how close they were standing. "I'll… See Natsuki in about an hour?" She then asked, taking a step closer, but to the side, now walking around her to meet Arika.

"Ah, yes… I'll stop by your quarters in an hour" And her Emerald eyes followed her form the entire time, not for one second leaving her sight.

"She's really cute, isn't she?" Youko commented as she watched the brunette go, her hands in her pockets.

"Yea…" Natsuki softly agreed, "N-No. Wait" But then gave up, "Just forget it" Then came the pout, and soon after, Nao's hysterical laugh followed.

Youko also laughed, but tried to explain what she had meant by that sentence, "I mean, the way she's acting. It's really cute" She had never seen Shizuru blush before, never. Calmness and pleasantness always grazed Shizuru's features, no matter the situation. The woman was always very hard to read, it was hard to surprise her, hard to get any kind of reaction out of her.

Natsuki definitely agreed, Shizuru was acting very cute, but she couldn't wait for her to be herself again. Couldn't wait for her memories to come back to her. She had so many things she wanted to tell her, to talk to her about, especially regarding their relationship.

She had taken so many things for granted before, and wanted to work on them, to make their relationship better, to take things a step further.

Later, That Night

Shizuru was sitting on her long sofa chair by the window. She was loosely hugging her knees against her chest, and had a soft smile on her lips as she stared at the moon and the sea of stars above.

Today had been a long day, and she was very tired from all the walking and all the people that she'd met, plus all the tests she had to take.

But she also felt happy, specially because she thinks she remembered something just a few minutes ago.

Next to her on the sofa was her diary, her journal. She had stumbled upon it about an hour ago when she was going through her drawers. She had read the first four entries of the diary already, and while she was reading it, she could visualize everything that had happened in her head.

She wasn't sure if it was her imagination visualizing what she was reading, or if it was actual memories, but she would soon find out, she thought she would ask Natsuki when she stopped by to check in on her.

- Knock -

- Knock -

"Shizuru, may I come in?"

And as if on cue, there Natsuki was. It was her soft yet husky voice.

"Hai, it's open" Shizuru shouted, not removing her stare from the sky.

Natsuki stepped in and closed the door behind her. Then, headed towards the brunette. She was already in her sleepwear, and was stopping by to wish Shizuru goodnight, and to see if she needed anything.

"All settled for bed?" Natsuki asked as she stood next to her, both of her hands in her robe's pockets. When Shizuru nodded, she continued, "Why do you always find that thing so interesting?" She couldn't help and ask as she looked up at the moon as well. Shizuru often stared at it, almost every night, she didn't know why.

"It's beautiful, isn't it?" Shizuru replied as she stared at the stary sky, "Doesn't it make you wonder where this beauty comes from? How did it get there?"

"No. Not really" Natsuki answered honestly. "I've never had the time to really think about it"

"Then Natsuki should make herself a little less busy and try to think a little more about the beauty that surrounds her"

Natsuki smiled. "I know... I should" Then replied, lovingly staring at the brunette.

After a long moment of silence, the brunette spoke. "Would you like to sit?" She motioned for the empty space in front of her, "I'd like to ask you something"

"Oh, okay" Natsuki raised a curious brow and went ahead and sat in front of her, sharing the long sofa chair with her. "What would you like to talk about?" She folded one leg over the other and waited for the brunette to speak.

"What's a Coral?" Shizuru asked after much thought, trying to remember the word.

"Corals are first and second year students" Natsuki explained, "After that, you become a Pearl. Pearls are upperclassmen... Why do you ask?"

"I was doing some light reading…" Shizuru then said, patting to the diary next to her.

"Ah, I see, so you've found your journal" Natsuki smiled. She remembers walking in on Shizuru a few times as she was writing on it. Shizuru had explained to her that she had started using it when she first enrolled Garderobe, just writing things here and there, things and feelings she didn't want to forget.

"I think I remembered something… Someone. But I need your help. I can't tell if it's a memory or if it's my imagination"

"Oh, alright. I wasn't in Garderobe when you were a first-year Coral, but I can try to help" Natsuki faced her direction, one leg fully resting on the sofa now, the other touching the ground. "What do you think you remember?"

"There's this girl. Her name is..." Shizuru couldn't remember her name, so her hand reached for the diary and went back to the first page of it. Ruby eyes scanned the page until she found the name. "Haruka-chan" She let out once she had found it, and then closed the diary again. "What does she look like?"

"Oh, Haruka-san… She was your roommate back then and number 2 Coral, you were the first" The blunette explained, but Shizuru seemed confused because of this, not knowing the terminology or ranks. "Um. She's got blondish hair, purple eyes, light skin. She's got very short bangs. And she's loud. Really loud... Obnoxiously loud" When Shizuru smiled wider, she couldn't help and smile herself.

That wide, playful smile, it could only mean that she remembers.

She actually remembers!

"Hold on, let me get something really quick" Natsuki excitedly said, "I'll be right back!" And quickly headed for her bedroom.

When she returned about a minute later, she had a picture in her hands. It was a picture of her Coral days. The six, top ranking Coral students were there, and so were the Trias, the top three Pearls. She sat down again and showed the picture to her.

"Is that her?" She asked the brunette.

"Ara~ That's her!" Shizuru confirmed, happy to have obtain some of her memory. It wasn't much, but at least it was something.

She went ahead and threw herself at the blunette, hugging her tightly, and then, after a moment, felt as the blunette hugged her back.

"Fufu, Natsuki looks really cute in her uniform... And she looks so serious" Shizuru then added after they had parted from their embrace, Ruby eyes looking down at the picture again.

They were sitting next to each other now, arm touching arm, leg touching leg. Shizuru couldn't deny it, she liked being next to her, being this close to her. It was calming. Soothing.

"You see that? That's a Coral uniform" Natsuki excitedly told her, a small blush on her cheeks because of the brunette's comment. "When you become a Pearl, you wear the grey uniform" She then pointed out a few things in the picture, "You were the top-ranking Pearl in your class, that's why your uniform is lighter than the other two Pearls, see?" She pointed to the three uniforms. "It's a way to distinguish and celebrate the top Pearl's achievements"

"Hai" Shizuru nodded, staring intently as the blunette talked. She was looking at her lips, those sweet lips, leaning closer. Her lips, her scent, her voice slowly pulling her in.

And then, she stopped and blinked a few times, unsure of why she was doing this. Why she was so drawn to her. She doesn't even know her.

Was she really just about to kiss her?

The brunette abruptly stood and placed some much needed distance between them, now leaning against the window.

And now that Shizuru was standing, Natsuki was able to see her outfit, what she was wearing to bed. Her eyebrows arched upwards and Emerald eyes slowly roamed the brunette's body from head to toe.

She was wearing a short, black, satin night gown, and was showing a lot of skin. A whole lot. Why wasn't she wearing the robe that came with it?

Natsuki brought a hand to her lips and cleared her throat, "Ahem" blushing and looking away, feeling excited, aroused just by looking at her. She absolutely loved that nightgown. She had gifted it to Shizuru on their first year anniversary.

"A-Alright, I, uh, I'm going to bed" Natsuki then stood, photograph in hand. She took a deep breath. "Have a good night, Shizuru... Sleep well" Then added, "And please don't stay up too late, you have an early morning tomorrow with Youko"

Shizuru frowned, "More tests?" she was hoping they were already done with that today. She was starting to feel like a science experiment. She didn't appreciate that.

"I know, I'm sorry…" The blunette noticed the expression and tone. "I'm not sure what she has planned for tomorrow. Maybe I can ask her to postpone it for a couple of days. Would you like that?"

"Hai, that would be lovely" Shizuru smiled at this. "Can we have breakfast by the garden again? I really love it there, it's so peaceful" She asked as she walked her to the door. When Natsuki nodded, she said, "Oyasumi, Natsuki. See you tomorrow"

"Good night, Shizuru. Sleep well" Natsuki gave a small wave and then watched as Shizuru did the same. Then, watched as she closed the door.

"Haruka-san of all people" Natsuki couldn't help and happily mutter as she walked the short distance to her bedroom. Thinking that Haruka must've made a hell of a first impression if Shizuru remembered her. "Looks like that journal will be of some use after all"

And Natsuki hoped that Shizuru would fully obtain her memories before she got to the part when she was a Pearl. That's the year they had met, and there were a lot of embarrassing memories then. She didn't want to have to relive them again, knowing the brunette would probably ask her many questions about that time.

- 0 -

Thanks for Reading!

And thanks for the reviews/ Comments

"For the love of ShizNat"