XXX

Deidara

They all stood before him, corpeal through the jutsu the Leader used to hold their meetings.

"Why have Sasori and you not returned to the main base yet?" The Leader asked quietly, while the rest of Akatsuki stood solemnly, watching him. The gaze of Itachi Uchiha seemed to especially bore into him, as if he somehow knew what was forthcoming before the rest.

"We... I am not returning, hmm."

Somehow, the silence grew, and suddenly the atmosphere changed from neutral to cold. To his direct left, Hidan shuffled indignantly, his slower mind still processing what he had said. The threat of immediate retaliation, what with their communication being through chakra holograms, was nonexistent, but the chill in the air was almost enough to make him take a step back.

"You what?" The slow, deep voice of the Leader vibrated in the cavern from his fingerpost.

It's now or never. "You all... are being used. By a man behind the shadows, hmm."

"We're what?" Kisame's laughter roiled through the chamber. "Sorry, I think Deidara took one to many explosions to the face. Stupid brat, how would us, the most fearful rogue ninja in the continent, be used by another, it's ridiculous."

"You have to believe me," Deidara pleaded. "The Akatsuki... a man called Tobi, he is running things from the shadows, pulling strings. We're working for some hidden agenda, something that's beyond any of us, hmm. He's an Uchiha, he's a madman, he's-"

"The Uchiha Clan is extinct except for my brother and myself," Itachi Uchiha broke out smoothly. He was looking at Deidara was slight interest, though his Sharigan, those blank and menacing Sharingan he detested endlessly, bored into him like a nail through wood. "Your identification of this adept is thus impossible. There is no other man who wields the Sharingan except Kakashi Hatake. You are talking nothing but lies. Now, tell us the real reason for this sudden change of heart, or I will remove the information by force."

The simple words bore enough suggestion that Deidara felt himself sweating. He was unsure whether Itachi's Tsukuyomi would actually hit him through the hologram, since they could still see each other, even if he was no actually there. Keep it cool. You have to get it through to them-

"He... he killed Sasori, hmm. And tried to kidnap the Nine-Tails from us, did in fact, and he's been hunting us, until we stopped him-"

"You captured the Nine-Tails? Absurd," Hidan scoffed. "It almost killed you last time! And now you miraculously captured it, just now? Bullshit."

"And you didn't report it," Kakuzua added harshly. "You have no way to backup your words, unless you still have him?"

"I... was to weak to contain him. I had to let him go..."

A mocking cough from Kisame again. "Of course, of course! A loophole for everything? Humor us, Deidara, this man, is there any way for you to back up your words? Because right now your grave is only being dug deeper." He hefted his blade Samehada, his small eyes piercing his soul. "One does not leave Akatsuki, ever. This was established after Kakuzu's previous partner tried to. Stop this fabricated nonsense."

"Zetsu!" Deidara blurted, trying one last time. "He works for him- he use the spores on us to lead Tobi right to us! He's a spy for him- he reports everything going on to him, hmm!"

Kisame turned jovially to Zetsu, who had not spoken a word since the meeting had begun. "Dear Zetsu, anything you'd like to add?"

"Utter nonsense!" White Zetsu cried indignantly. "Why, we would never betray Akatsuki. There is no such pretender called Tobi, to our knowledge-"

"OF COURSE HE WOULD DENY IT, HE WORKS FOR HIM, HMM!" Deidara shouted. "Itachi, Tsukuyomi him, get the truth-"

The Leader's deep voice penetrated the argument, and as he spoke, Deidara knew there was no longer any hope. "Deidara, your allegiance has obviously changed, to accuse Zetsu, perhaps the most dedicated out of all of us." His voice was grating but secretive, as if the Leader somehow knew everything he was saying held some sort of truth.

The Leader...

"Nagato," Deidara pleaded. "He told me your name, Tobi did. He told me, you've never told us any of that-"

The Rinnegan widened in momentary surprise, but then the instant was gone. They narrowed into cold purple slits. "Where you came to possess such information is beyond me," he said sharply. "Your story holds no truth, Deidara. In fact, it seems to me you've tried to create some farfetched story to cover up Sasori's death-"

Deidara stopped cold. "No," he whispered. "You can't be suggesting..."

"Killing another member... is an act that cannot be forgiven unless you are of Kakuzu's anger levels. You want to leave us? Very well, boy, your time here is at an end. No longer will you be welcomed by us, but now you shall not only be hunted by the nations of our land, but by its criminals as well." The Leader, Nagato, extended a finger and pointed it at him. "From now on, you are a man with no home, as decreed by a God."

He had tried. He had truly tried to make them see the truth of it all, but they were right. What evidence did he have of all this? None, there was nothing he could do, especially with Zetsu denying everything.

Akatsuki- if it had ever truly existed- was no more to him.

The image in front of him faded as the Leader clasped his hands together. He was facing the oasis from the battle, having used it to perform the ritual, and faced it silently, in deep thought. There was nothing more I could do. I... I tried.

He looked up from the pond, and gave himself a small smile. It was the most I could do. Not everything works out how we wanted, but I did not leave them to wallow in the darkness, blind to what goes on around them. Perhaps they can figure it out for themselves; Itachi definitely seemed to know something was wrong. It was the best that could be done...

XXX

The Core was the only thing he had salvaged from Sasori's burnt and mangled puppet body, which had been devestated in the C3 detonation. Luckily, he had thought to snag it before he had create the earth-style cave. Now, as he soared above the bleak desert towards Sasori's workshop, he pulled it out.

It fit snugly in his hand, and was still warm with whatever Sasori had harbored inside it. The liquid chakra had hardened around it, coating it in murky red. He held it tightly, trying to ignore the entire section that had gone missing. A man with no home... wasn't it so much easier to accept that before? Now it's... daunting. Sasori, would you be the same, if you were still with me?

Bonds. That's what had created him The bond with another, the feeling of connection with another human. In the most bizarre circumstances, it had not even been completely human with who he had bonded with; but the sentiment remained.

You must finish filling in the void.

Some time later, he touched down outside the hideout. He wasted no time; Zetsu had obviously been to the hideout before, and although Deidara had ditched his Akatsuki cloak during the journey, knowing a spore was somewhere hidden along it, he suspected Zetsu might believe he would come looking for him here, and bring unwanted company with him.

In a few minutes, he had dug a 2 foot hole in the ground. Unsure of really what to do, never having participated in a funeral, let alone a burial, he tossed the Core into the hole.

The void of loneliness... we helped each other fill it in. Now you have to finish filling it in. That was what he had told him, Sasori's dying request. And he would answer it.

"Thank you," he said quietly to the Core, then shoved the sand on top of it. There was no way to tell if anything was buried there, if by chance someone else discovered this place. His unmarked grave would remain undisturbed and exist forever- something fitting for the man who had wanted to do the same for years.

He stood there awkwardly, wanting to say more, feeling he should for the man who had in such a short time had done more than anyone had in his young life.

Somehow, he knew Sasori would understand the briefness of his words and understand every ounce of meaning he had put into them. So, with a flourish of his hair, he saddled the clay bird once more and took off for the place he hoped would finish filling in the void.

I will be seeing you soon, Sasori.

XXX

Other

"What a touching affair," Black Zetsu remarked. "Such a quick ceremony- and bothersome one. These human customs of burying the dead are truly hampering to us, when all we want to do is eat their body. I can barely tell where Sasori's Core was buried-"

"Don't look for it and don't touch it."

"Why?"

"Because I said not to."

"Oh," White Zetsu said thoughtfully. "Don't tell me seeing him and Sasori bond is reminding you of your former relationship with Kakashi?"

It was true. The inexplicable, sudden, deep trust that had formed in days between the Deidara and Sasori had reminded him to much of the same sudden respect and trust that he had developed with Kakashi during the mission to Kannabi Bridge. Even the suddenness of Sasori's death, which had been similar to his own at the time, was the same.

And just like Kakashi, Deidara was somehow maintaining his grasp on the hope the world offered, even with his best friend suddenly slipping through his fingers as quickly as it had been formed. But seeing them... it had almost seemed like that in the world that had abandoned him, there was still the smallest, possible glimpse of hope that there might be something wonderful in it, something that had, in that moment of confrontation with Kakashi, almost made him turn back...

But no. Project Tsukuyomi had progressed to far. There was no stopping it; like the tide of the ocean, it would always come back no matter how far it retreated. It had swallowed him whole, and even though as he watched Deidara fly confidently off towards an unknown destination, with a confidence he very much wanted back in his own plan, he knew he could not forsake what had to be done.

The past is the past... see how Deidara buries it away... the future is Tsukuyomi, and there is no point in forestalling the inventible. This... is the only way peace can be reliably created. Not on the whims of random friendship and hope...

"Obito, are you even listening to what we say?"

He banished the thoughts from the past that had been invading his mind. "What do you want?"

"We asked if you want us to multiply the spores on Deidara. He saw through the one on his cloak, but he hasn't noticed the ones we snuck in behind his hair. Doing so would siphon his chakra off and probably kill him."

"No, let him go."

Black Zetsu, despite lacking any facial features, recoiled the entire head in surprise. "You want to let him go free," he said in his raspy, inhuman tone. "He has much information on Ataksuki; he's very dangerous-"

"No matter what secrets he has, he is only a minor problem. There are more pressing matters: such as recapturing the Nine-Tails and the rest of the tailed beasts. There is more work to be done; one blonde fool is the least of my concerns. Allow Nagato to spend his time chasing after him; but you are not to tell him his location with the spores."

"And why not?" White Zetsu was being repressed; to Tobi's bewilderment, Black Zetsu had pushed himself to the front. His single yellow eye examined him deeply.

"Because I said so. Besides, where will he go? He has nowhere he can go to for comfort. Allow him to live out the remainder of his life in solitude and see how Sasori lied to him of the world being a beautiful place. I want to see him crumble... and finally give up with his mediocre ideals!"

Angry with himself and feeling a tear well up in his eye as more memories poured into him from the past, he disappeared to where no one could hear him scream.

XXX

Deidara

The Gates of Iwakgakure were very familiar to him; it was almost as if he was walking back into the village from his first mission with Oniki. Now, he glided the bird down in front of the entrance. The guards there were stunned, made almost no movement to apprehend one of their most wanted. They probably never would have suspected him walking right into their arms.

"Y-You're Deidara-!"

"I know. I surrender." He extended his lone arm, and one hesitantly drew handcuffs, then locked his hand to his own.

"We need to take him to the Tsuchikage for judgement," the one he was cuffed to said uneasily. "Cover his back."

They proceeded to walk through the village. Not much had changed; the houses were still made of the same old cracked stone, the same kids played around the market square, the same veterans stood quietly by their memorials. However, the procession began to attract eyes away from the everyday business.

The eyes of hundreds, following him, one of the few who had ever left the Village Hidden in the Stones, and definitely the most well-known criminal among those who had even survived abandoning the village. The crowd followed him eagerly, knowing perhaps what fate awaited him. He imagined they were excited by the prospect of it being public, but he shook the feeling off. His guards held him stiffly as they went up the steps to the Tsuchikage's office, a towering prison-like structure that jutted out into the sky, where the only beauty rested inside the courtyard he had been to so long ago…

Four men were waiting at the top of the steps, where the front doors had already been held open. A stream of guards exited and barred the crowd from coming any further in.

One of the men approached, and he recognized him as the Iwagakure Brigadier General, a man of great skill who was Oniki's second in command. He looked him up and down coldly, before waving off his escorts. "Fine work, gentlemen," he said proudly. "The Elite will take it from here." On the final word, the other three men, who indeed boasted the emblem of the Elite on their right chest pocket, wound him up in a series of glowing brown chains, which instantly snapped his remaining arm to his side. There was no way t move except walk where they guided him now.

The doors closed behind him, shutting out the outside world. They took him through the Office, where multiple other guards stood on standby.

And suddenly, he was outside again, and he knew what awaited him. However, he froze as he heard the words coming from his old sensei's mouth.

"Lord Tsuchikage."

"Mishimoto, I said no interruptions during my granddaughter's training! Why are… what-"

The Brigadier General pulled Deidara by his hair forward, making him wince. He was dumped unceremoniously on the crowd, making him even filthier than he already was.

"The Rogue, Deidara, Undesirable Number One. He surrendered at the front gates in this state; obviously, the shame of abandoning his village finally got to him."

Deidara looked up from the ground. Oniki was as elderly as ever, his eyes blankly staring at him. But further behind him…

She's still here… and as beautiful as the day I left… left it all behind…

"Mishimoto, I desire time alone with the captive. You may undo the bindings on him, it's quite clear he didn't come here to make threat."

The Brigadier General's brow furrowed, and his voice became tense. "He is our most notorious outlaw; we should execute him now. His crimes are evident, there is no need for any trial, mock or not. Killing him in the square will be satisfactory enough for the people and the daimyo-"

"I am well aware, General. Now wait outside the courtyard until I order otherwise."

The General opened his mouth, then curled his lip. "As you wish, Oniki." He snapped his fingers, and the Elite undid the chains binding him. Slowly, he picked himself up, face down so that no one could see the emotions rippling across his face.

Send her away to, please… my judgement is only for you to carry out, I don't want her to see… see what I am…

The doors to the courtyard shut. They were three, the former trio who had trained in the greenery of the courtyard. Some of the only life that had existed inside the barren Land of Earth. How foolish had it been, back then, to want to destroy it all…

"Kurostichi, you too. Leave us."

"Grandfather, I have just as much as a right-"

"GO!"

"No! I have just as much as a right to be here as you do. He left us both when he left the village, I can hear what he says." She was looking down at him, and though her tone was strong, her eyes betrayed what she felt. Why have you come back? They said. Do you want to cause more pain?

"Sensei…"

The Tsuchikage froze again. "Now what," he answered snidely. "Do I deserve to be called that again? Is General Misihimto right, have you come back here groveling for your life, when you're on the verge of defeat? Where is your honor, with that ragtag group of misfits called Akatsuki?"

"I'm sorry, sensei, hmm." He said it as sincerely as he could manage in the state he was in, on the verge of tears. No, I have to do this. Sasori… his grandmother tried to let him answer judgement for what he did, that's what he said. And he refused then, but accepted judgement in the end, from his loved ones in the next life. This is filling the void… seeking the forgiveness, then dying. In death, I answer for what I've done to these people…

Oniki was baffled, but soon recovered. "You're sorry?" he sniffed stiffly. "How many years? How many deaths? One of our most sacred techniques, stolen so insolently, as if it were a piece of chocolate! You hateful child, you think you can waltz into your homeland-"

"That hates me, that wants every part of me to be killed. hmm? Do you think I came here for my own enjoyment," he shouted, unable to hold in the nervousness he felt. Kurostichi's presence was unnerving him; he had hoped it would be just Oniki he would seek his punishment from. He was his sensei, the fatherly figure. It was from him the attachment had been most real, he felt, the only one who could truly fill in the void of loneliness and guilt…

"I… I was a fool, when I left the village. But now, I understand what you tried to teach me. The unity of the village, the bonds… a friend, like me, he opened me up…" The words were fumbling, and Oniki was appearing ore and more mystified. Deidara knew what he was thinking: How would you feel if the student you treasured as your equal betrayed you out of the blue, then returned just the same?

Kurostichi was still staring at him. He ignored it.

"Sensei… I've come to ask for your judgement on me. Only you… have the right to end me. You are right, my crimes are numerous, hmm. My partner-a great man- hated the world like I did. We found no excitement in it, did not value it! But then, we found each other as friends, something to replace the emptiness… he said I must finish filling in that void. And now… I ask you to pass judgement on me, to make sure the void never empties again, hmm!"

Oniki opened his mouth, closed it. His eyes also closed, and his forehead creased. "Your void needs to be filled?" he said quietly. "You've changed?"

"I am sorry, hmm," he said again, and this time he kneeled.

And waited.

"Deidara, my former pupil… I cannot forgive you for what you have done. Your words may ring honest, but in my heart I cannot forgive you, and neither can the hearts of all the people you betrayed." Deidara looked up into the distantly regretful face of his sensei. "You will go to the city square with general Mishimoto and be publicly executed for your crimes. That is the way it must end, your previous transgressions cannot be forgiven-"

"Grandfather, you can't!" Kurostichi cried. "He wants to be forgiven, that's all he wants! Can you not give a condemned man the only thing he wants!"

Oniki's eyebrows came down. "You are too young and naïve, Kurostichi," he said gruffly. "You cannot let the emotions you once felt for him get in the way of justice-"

"He just wants your forgiveness!"

"Kurostichi-"

To Deidara's deep shock, she walked over to him and stood in front of him, between pupil and sensei. "I believe in justice, and you being to cold-hearted to find even a shred of forgiveness for him is not it."

She's defending me? Why? She must hate me just as much as the rest of the village. Or…

It had not occurred to him that there might be someone who still cared for him, in the world he had left. Bonds… they go both ways. Could she really still be caring for me, after what I've done?

"He was your pupil, like a son, you said!" she went on. "You cried for days when he left, admitted that you would not have been able to kill him the day he left! But now, at your feet, he asks to be forgiven, before he allowed himself to be killed?" Her voice tremored. "Are the bonds you taught us about this easily broken? Can you bend them just as easily as you please?"

Oniki closed his eyes again. Deidara looked at Kurostichi, dumbfounded. "You still…?"

She turned to face him. "Some bonds can be broken, but I never did with you," she said quietly. "I always hoped you would come back, someday…"

"General Mishimoto!" The general and his men entered with no pause, as if they had been waiting all along.

"Shall we proceed, Lord Tsuchikage?"

"No- escort Deidara down to the dungeons and put him under strict guard. I believe his intentions are sincere to forgiving the village, and he is willing to help us once again."

Mishimoto's face grew red. "You cannot disregard our law because he is your former pupil," he said dangerously. "He must face execution!"

"And it is our most sacred law," Oniki countered just as coldly. "To uphold the bonds of the village. There are other ways a man can pay for his crimes, General. He wanted to die; he will live. And he will live in service to the village that, in due time, will come to acknowledge him again. You have your orders."

The other grew even redder, but relapsed. "Very well. Come, prisoner."

"Why?" Deidara asked. "Why are you doing this, why won't you just kill me?"

"Because there are other ways to fill in the void you speak of, Deidara. And you are not the only one who has been empty of the person they once held close to them." Oniki came over and put a hand on his shoulder, offered a small smile.

Kurostichi came up and hugged him. "Does this mean we can do missions together again?" she whispered, and he felt his chest burn with a sensation he had not felt since he left.

"Y…yeah… hmm…"

Sasori… perhaps it will be a bit longer before I see you, my friend, but can understand, right? To fill in the void… with others, not just their judgement.

When I see you, maybe we can both live our lives they were meant to be.

They carted him off into the coldness of the cell, but it did not affect him; the warmth of his sensei's and Kurostichi's touch would last him till the day he died.