A/N: I have a strong sense that what happens in this chapter could be considered cliché, but oh well, it felt right.
Thanks for all the support :)
Chapter 29
Two days later, October 22, Great Hall
Word about Blaise's expulsion spread like wild-fire, each circumstance being more elaborate than the last, as no one knew of the real reasons except Theo and Draco. He paid no mind to their curious glances every time he walked in or sat at the Slytherin table, as he was too busy staring at her. His brain trying to think of a way to get her to speak to him again.
He really wished she didn't sit with her back to him, but on the same lines, he didn't blame her... he wouldn't even look at himself if given the chance; now knowing what Blaise showed her was the actual truth.
He tensed his fists, completely disgusted with himself.
"He's staring at you again," Ginny said as matter-of-factly.
Hermione sighed, pushing the food all along her plate, but never lifting it. "Let him, I don't care anymore"
"He doesn't look happy, either. My guess is lack of sleep"
"Just whose side are you on anyway?" Hermione spat, dropping her fork and pushing her plate away. "Wonderful, you've made me lose my appetite" she felt the tug in her stomach as she glanced at the food. It was rather hard for her to keep anything down, as she couldn't stop thinking of being made such a fool of. She tried not to picture his defeated expression from Ginny's words either.
'Serves him right' she took a calming breath and then a sip of water.
"Actually you haven't been eating-"
"Oh Ginny please stop this!" Hermione moaned, smacking the goblet on the table. It was bad enough that he haunted her dreams, the least thing she wanted to do was talk about him. As she had spent enough of the weekend crying and being angry at both herself and at Malfoy, she wasn't going to let the emotions ruin today!
'New day, new me!'
"It's been two days... Hermione."
Hermione scoffed, "And what? You actually want me to talk to him?" She shook her head, "You're out of your mind. I'm done with him!"
"Well knowing you, you want answers...so that statement runs a little... weak"
"I got all the answers I needed from that memory thanks!" She felt the familiar jump in her stomach, at saying the words.
"But you never let him explain"
"What is there to explain?" She combed her fingers through her hair. "He used me for some sick game so he can gain back his house! Nothing that happened was actually genuine!" She reached over and slipped her bag over her shoulder.
"I was nothing but a ninny believing that he wanted to be different! And by hell or high water, Ginevra Weasley, I will not be made a fool of again! He can sulk for all the rest of the year for all I care, it was his own bloody fault!"
Hermione pushed herself up and then strolled out of the room. Ginny sighed, glancing over to the barely touched plate of food across from her. As much as Ginny wanted to believe that her friend was unaffected by what Malfoy had done, the signs were too big to ignore. She braced her shoulders and then made her way over to the Head Table.
Draco had watched her leave, and then went back to his meal, deciding against going after her.
"You know," Theo began in between chews, "Doing this only gives her a reason to believe what she saw was the truth. You should prove to her that... well you feel differently about her, go after her"
Draco noticed that a few looks from the Gryffindor table were being cast his way, as well as the Headmistress, as if waiting for that exact thing to happen. For him to make a move.
"Bloody nosey gits" he muttered as he resumed in mutilating his breakfast.
"Well mate-"
"Can you just knock it off for one second?" Draco snapped, "I'm trying not to think right now."
"So what?" Theo sighed, "This is it? Just going to call it quits? The Draco Malfoy I know never gives up! So I say you pick your sorry arse up and go after your woman!"
Draco sighed, shaking his head. He rubbed his chin as he scraped his fork along the plate. "Not really sure how... to be honest."
"What do you mean? Just tell her that you didn't use her!"
"Except that... I did. Had all it been for a ruse? I thought I just wanted to change, you know, to make up for what I've done to her in the past and everything. Clearly this game negates it"
Theo shook his head, "Well... that's Blaise's doing, he changed your memory and emotions. But yes it was a ruse, but again, it changed. You wanted to call it off, because you care for her. So stop sulking and just fix it already!"
Draco scoffed, "Easier said than done, Theo, believe me."
"Well then you're a bloody fool, and Blaise wins!" Theo smacked his hands on the table and then strolled off.
Draco bowed his head down and groaned.
Potions Class
The air in the Potions class was stiff. No one was saying anything, they all just carried on their own work. Making the Oculus Potion to replenish Madam Pomfrey's stock.
Except one.
Draco sat on his stool, flipping through his Advanced Potions absent-mindedly, not really searching for the potion's steps.
"Something the matter, Mister Malfoy?" Said Slughorn as he approached his side. "You haven't touched a thing and it's been thirty minutes. Everyone's already got their ingredients and started their potions..."
"Apologies Professor," his eyes trailed to Hermione's back, his heart throbbing painfully. He so badly wanted to make it right again. Theo had a point, if he did sulk, then Blaise would win by successfully keeping Hermione away from him. But there was just so much mess to clean up, the end and happiness seemed so unlikely. And already have been on the receiving end of her anger was a fair reason for him to not screw it up.
"But my mind... doesn't seem to be in it today. I would like to request an early leave."
He heard her scoff rudely - clearly having heard what he said - where he narrowed his eyes curiously. 'How strange,'
Unbeknownst to him, though, Slughorn had followed his gaze and hummed thoughtfully watching as his top student stir away at her cauldron.
"Permission denied, Mister Malfoy. But only because I would like a word with you. Please come to my office. Everyone carry on and keep up the great work."
Draco sighed, after Slughorn returned his gaze from Hermione's back. 'Wonderful, just what I need, his option about us' He got up from his stool and strolled after Slughorn, "Miss Granger, please keep an eye on everything should anything go wrong"
"Of course, Professor," came her professional, but lifeless tone.
'I did that. It's my fault' Draco thought lolling his head backward to alleviate the pressure on his muscles.
Slughorn closed the door, "So it seems the situation with you and Miss Granger rings true, hmm?" He waved his hand for Draco to take a seat. He did after a couple of seconds.
"As Head of Slytherin House, it is my duty to understand my students emotions. To help those that require it, even though they do not desire that help,"
Draco shrugged, figuring it was best to just tell him rather than fight him, "It's simple. I messed up, quite badly and... well there's nothing I can do to change it to make it better"
Slughorn sighed, "Ah so you're... giving up is it? How unfortunate to hear"
"Yeah, well whatever," he muttered folding his arms. He felt a sudden rush of cold in the office, like a window was left open. The chill ran down his body and to his toes. "Can I go now?"
"Now, now there will be none of that. Yes, it is rather unfortunate that things happened the way they did, but dismissing it, is hardly the way to go about it. Not to mention it would make her believe she is not worth fighting for"
Draco was taken aback from hearing the words.
Slughorn waved a knowing finger, at the younger wizard's expression, "Didn't think of that did you?"
Draco rolled his eyes and sighed. 'Obviously'
"Everyone goes through trail and errors when in relationship. Betrayal of trust being the biggest one. If you let what spilt you two apart control you, well then, what had it all been for? You see, females are very interesting creatures Mister Malfoy, they want a sense of security, need and above all, to feel cherished, and it is up to you to find a way to express such things. Now you can go,"
Short and simple and to the point. Just like how Draco liked all his 'pep-talks'
"Um... thanks Professor, I'll look into that,"
Slughorn smiled, "Don't thank me yet, Mister Malfoy. The girl is just as strong-willed as you are and quite stubborn in most cases. You're looking in for quite the ride,"
Draco sighed, 'Don't I know that!' He stood up and walked out of Slughorn's office, where most of the class looked right in his direction. She didn't though. He did, however, spot her hesitate for a brief moment before reaching for an ingredient to add to her cauldron.
His eyes also caught a certain pair burrowing into his skull. His eyes slanted over to spot Weasley's smug expression and Potter's distain - clearly having caught him staring that their comrade. Draco muttered to himself, strolling over to his desk to retrieve his items and then strolled on without a backward glance.
The sound vibrated around the room, making Hermione still for a second time. Her heart imitated the sound in her ears and the blood rushed to her head. 'Good riddance'
"He's not worth it," came Ernie's reply at her side as he examined his book for the next ingredient, ground unicorn horn.
Hermione closed her eyes for a moment before she began stirring, "Please, I am not going to give him that kind of power. No, I'm done." Yet for some strange reason the declaration didn't feel as strong as when she said it to Ginny earlier that morning.
'No matter,' she thought, shrugging. She examined the hue of her potion. It was supposed to turn into a deep orange and once she achieved it, she stepped back and grinned. Never once having been so relaxed and thrilled at completing a task. Yes, focusing all her frustrations from a certain blond was definitely beneficial to her studies, she had finished twenty minutes before class was due!
"All finished here Professor"
Slughorn waddled his way over and peered down into the cauldron, "Ah yes a perfectly brewed Oculus Potion! Madam Pomfrey will be most appreciated! Twenty points to Gryffindor and another five for being first to finish! You are dismissed Miss Granger."
Feeling much better than she had in days, Hermione strolled on down the corridor, humming to herself. 'Nothing like Acing a class to up my spirits!'
She rounded the corner and the smile fell from her face. Malfoy was leaning against the wall, seemingly waiting for her.
'No' she shook her head. 'I'm not going to let you ruin my day!' She went to carry on like she never saw him, but Malfoy was quicker and stepped in her way.
"Not so fast, Hermione"
Hearing her name was like a stab in her heart. She wasn't going to let him have it though. She just turned around and went back down the way she just came from.
He expected this, so now with his ability to use magic again, he conjured up an invisible wall to stop her from escaping.
Her eyes widened in shock as she whirled back around to face him, "You can use your magic again?!"
Draco nonchalantly twirled his wand with his fingers, "McGonagall was rather upset of...uh, what happened. Truthfully so am I."
"Oh please, you're just angry because you lost a small fortune! After all that... cock and bull story about being so poor and... oh whatever. I don't have time for this. I don't want to spend time on this! It's futile and... quite pointless. Finite Incantatem!" She was ready to leave again, but Malfoy made another invisible wall.
"I am poor. You want proof, here," he reached into his robes and pulled out a folded piece of printed paper.
Hermione just glared at him for having stopped her from escaping.
Draco waved the paper back in forth tauntingly, where she snarled, snatching the paper from his grasp. She hastily opened it, noting that it was dated five months ago:
Despite the death of Voldemort (which we can now say, now that he is actually deceased), both Lucius Abraxas Malfoy, and wife Narcissa (ages forty-nine and forty-eight respectively), were sent to Azkaban Prison and had been fined one-hundred thousand Galleons once the Ministry found highly Dark Artifacts in their possession. Although Lucius Malfoy denied that they owned such products, the Ministry felt that they were no longer trust-worthy, and thus took ownership of their estate and vaults. He did however, expressed that his son, and Heir of the Malfoy name, Draco Lucius Malfoy (age twenty-one) would not be punished for his wrong-doings. Referencing to when Voldemort gave him the Dark Mark at the age of sixteen.
Hermione blinked, staring at the words before her.
"You're welcome to check it. You know, for any false information." He said, watching her read and reread the article, hoping that she would not use magic.
"Well now that you can use magic, who knows? You probably tricked the paper so I wouldn't know the difference anyway" She threw it back into his grasp. Flinching slightly when her fingers came into contact with his.
"I'm not making excuses here, alright?" Draco said defensively, "I deserved all I got for the disgusting thing I did with Blaise about you" 'Even though I have no memory of making it with Blaise,'
"And I'll do it again if you don't let me go!" She hissed. She could still feel the sting from his touch lingering on her fingertips.
It was difficult to try to convince her he was not the bad guy, when so much evidence was against him. But he had to try.
"Just wait okay? It's not that simple-"
"And what, you don't think it's hard for me to stand here?" Hermione emphasized by flailing her arms in the space between them, "To be around you when all it was a sham? My emotions were involved in this game Malfoy! Why can't you just quit while you're ahead and leave me the hell alone!"
He heard the high-pitch sob at the end of her sentence felt like a sucker-punch right in the gut. "Because..." he began slowly, "I don't want to just walk away from this, or you. I want to fight it to make it work,"
Hermione scoffed, shaking her head in disbelief, "Now where have I heard that before?" She said in a condescending tone.
Draco felt the sharp jab in his chest again, "It is the truth! I really do want this to work!"
"Right, because I suddenly mean something to you? How... convenient!"
Draco released a slow breath, "Well yeah you do. Which is why I am here and want to set it all straight again! I made a terrible mistake! One of the worst one's in my life, actually. I never should have done it. It was stupid and pitiful. I hurt you and... I'm sorry. For everything"
Hermione inhaled sharply, not wanting to let her emotions take over, "You're sorry. Really, that's all you have to say?" Apart of her was surprised of his words. Of how genuine he had sounded, but the other, more rational part of her knew not to believe him. She couldn't. Not again! She cursed at herself once she felt a tear welling up in the corner of her eye.
"Well no, obviously there's more," he swallowed and cleared his throat, "but it's just...different okay? The feeling for me, is different. A good different. When I was around you, it was... odd. I wasn't repulsed or... anything like that. It was... good. It felt right."
"Yes... but you hurt me..." Hermione sniffed.
"And I hate myself for it! But please, if you can give me the chance to prove to you that it wasn't just a game-"
"But that's just it!" She said, not really wanting to hear what else he had to say. "I don't want to give you that chance." She felt her walls rebuilding themselves, and her confidence became more dominant, "You don't deserve it!"
And that's when he saw the stray tear running down her cheek. It was another sucker-punch to the gut.
"I know," he said after a moment of silence. He tried to recall Slughorn's words of wisdom, "It's going to take a long while for me to regain your trust-"
"But I'm never going to trust you again! Don't you get it?! You abused my pain against Ron for your personal agenda and that to me is unforgivable. I am glad you are sorry, because you're going to be feeling it for the rest of your pathetic life! So wallow away in the gutter where you belong, I don't care anymore."
She turned her back on him, took a few breaths to calm herself and then raised her wand, fighting it to keep steady. "F-Finite Incantatem" The wall disappeared and then she was gone.
Draco clenched his fist and rammed it right into the brick wall, cursing.
Headmistress' Office, five hours later
The rest of the day went by smoothly, which was just what she needed after her spat with Malfoy! She had buried herself in her work in Herbology (where he didn't show up), and was able to avoid mostly everyone (actually just Harry) until she and Ernie went to McGonagall's office for the upcoming Hallowe'en festivities.
Ernie sighed, "Yes, so we're looking at spending about three days tops, if we can get all the Prefects to help us out that is."
"Well we're not including the Slytherins," Hermione sneered, "We'll be just fine with everyone else helping us"
Both Ernie and McGonagall released a collective sigh.
"Ah Mister MacMillan, could you please give me and Miss Granger a moment?"
Ernie braved a glance at Hermione, who harrumphed, before taking a stand, "You know, forget what I just said, I think we should cancel the idea"
"We most certainly will not!" Hermione screeched. It was also for something for her to focus on, she would be damned to let get cancelled!
"Well obviously you look like hell and a haunted house would do nothing about your emotions. We make it to a dance, it was the runner-up after all"
"You can't just change it like that! People would need more time to get dresses and tux-"
"And we have a week for all of that to happen, you know that right? That's a fair amount of time to collect all the required items, don't you think? So we'll put up the announcement tonight then,"
Hermione pushed herself to her feet, "No I won't have-"
"Well it was the Slytherins who wanted the haunted house remember? Obviously you and everyone else in this school wants to behead Malfoy, so-"
"That is enough from the both of you!" Snapped McGonagall. She took a deep breath, "Now I asked to speak to Miss Granger alone, I would appreciate that you would obey that request!" She shot the Head Boy a pointed look.
"As far as changing the festivities to a dance, that would be splendid." She then gave Hermione the same look. "This school could use cheering up!"
Hermione groaned. She had a strange sense of déjà vu, when Professor Lockhart wanted to up the spirits of the school when it was being threatened by the Basilisk, by sending out singing Valentine's. Except she was the one that was moody. She couldn't help but feel a little offended.
"Please reconsider, Headmistress" Hermione muttered after hearing the door close after Ernie left. "I don't really-"
McGonagall laced her fingers together and sighed, "I understand your distress due to the recent situation with Mister Malfoy-"
Hermione shifted again, but refrained from saying anything, McGonagall just went on, "But I must say, Hermione, your friends are worried about you. First Mister Longbottom, then Mister Potter and now Miss Weasley! All expressed great concern regarding eating habits and odd sleeping patterns..."
"I don't understand how having a dance will make everything better." She dropped her gaze to the ground. She had purposefully ignored the Headmistress' words.
"Please, forget about the dance for the moment. We are talking about you!"
But Hermione wasn't having that either. So she opted for the easy way out, "I'm fine now that I've got rid of the poison in my life. I really couldn't be happier"
McGonagall glared at her, "Now honestly Hermione, I am not blind! What happened with you and Mister Malfoy was upsetting-"
'That's an understatement!' Hermione snorted, "I was tricked, so yes it stings. But I'll get over it." 'Give or take a few more days...'
McGonagall got up from her desk and walked over to the cabinet where her Pensieve was.
"Perhaps, but I feel there is something you should see first... one of my memories,"
Hermione stared at the Pensieve, and shook her head. Seeing the other memory was still too fresh in her mind.
"I am not accepting 'no' for an answer!" Barked McGonagall, "You need to see these, and then we'll talk. Understood?"
Hermione jumped at McGonagall's sudden outburst and then, without anymore questions, she got up and made her way over to her mentor's side.
Great Hall, one hour later
After the second disagreement with Hermione, the day felt even slower and more unbearable. Almost everyone shot him hateful looks and whispers about what happened with their Head Girl earlier that afternoon.
He glared at the whispering paintings just to the side of him and sneered, "Mind your own bloody business!"
He stormed into the Great Hall and sat roughly down at the table, knocking Pansy along the way.
"Hey watch it, y-oh it's you, Draco..."
Draco took a deep breath before facing her, "Save whatever you want to say Pansy, I don't want to hear it"
As usual, Pansy denied his request and scooted herself closer to him, wrapping an arm around his shoulders.
"You shouldn't let it bother you so much, you know," She ran her hand down his back, "It makes you awfully tense,"
"Don't," he began trying to escape from her clutches.
"I only say this because unlike everyone else here, I care what happens to you!"
Draco relaxed for a moment at her words. He braved a glance at the Gryffindor table, seeing that Hermione wasn't in her usual spot.
Pansy ignored where he was looking and just continued to rub his back, "Of course I'm still upset about what you did to Blaise-"
"Blaise did that to himself. No one forced him to use those spells against those Professors"
Pansy frowned shifting her hand upward to massage the back of his neck, "Right of course. I'm sorry,"
Draco rolled his eyes at her flakiness, but said nothing. He welcomed the oddly comforting of her rubbing while he helped himself to some dinner.
It lasted about five minutes.
He had just about enough of everyone's judgemental looks, he got up from his seat and out of the hall. He knew a good dose of Calming Draught could do well for both his mind and body. Yet, before taking a step out of the Great Hall, Harry Potter blocked his path.
"Out of my way Potter," he hissed, knocking the Boy Wonder out of his way by roughly knocking him in the shoulder, but Harry latched onto his enemy's arm to pull him back.
"You're a right foul git, doing what you did to Hermione," he spat through gritted teeth. He had always felt protective of his friend, and this approach was a long-time coming. He would finally give Malfoy a piece of his mind! "Parading around pretending, when I knew better!"
Draco groaned as he took a step back, but Harry stopped him again, "Oh no you don't. You don't get to weasel off after what you did! You stand here and take it for once in your rotten life!"
Draco snarled as he yanked Harry's arm off him, "What are you, her mother?! Yes, I am quite aware what I did was utterly stupid, hateful, spiteful..." Draco began counting off his fingers, "Demeaning... disgusting...and whatever other creative word out there. I mean, not proud of it, that's what you and everyone else in this bloody school tends to overlook. It's not made me happy or anything grand but feeling just...well pathetic. It actually makes me sick to have used her in such a way. Don't you get that?"
His voice echoed around the now, silent Great Hall, but he was too annoyed to care.
Harry inhaled sharply, his eyes twitching slightly, "Cut the theatrics Malfoy! Nobody believes you!"
Draco kept his stance still, "Can't say I didn't expect that. You figure, me being a Death Eater and everything, makes me incapable of making mistakes, which makes you just as naïve as the rest of them. This," he showed Harry his arm with the Dark Mark, "Wasn't my decision. My father failed his mission and this was his reward - punishing me! Just like how my life was on the line should I fail my mission. Everything that happened was because of me, and I get that. It was a mistake. I was scared for my life! You remember how that felt, don't you?"
Harry went to speak but Draco went on. Finally releasing all his frustrations at himself out in the open.
"Well it's the same thing with Hermione. Okay so it was a ruse, to take advantage of her and scrap her, and it... makes me cringe that I would sink that low!"
Harry scoffed, but Draco just ignored him, "It was a terrible mistake. She's strong, confident, and... I suppose it was jealously that drove me to want to break that. It is said to make one unnaturally vengeful, and I was. It was petty, and cruel and down-right asinine." 'Oh hell, might as go for broke,'
He cleared his throat, "I would like to apologize for the pain and... heartache I have caused to you, her, and everyone else for that matter. It was a sneaky way to earn my life back and completely not worth it. I'm ashamed at myself for everything that was done to this school and her, both the past and present and most of all, the future. Especially the future. I want to change, to be a better person, a person someone would be proud to know, not scared of, or manipulated into caring about! And yes as uncanny as that may seem to you, Harry, but I do care about her, Hermione. Seeing her smile because of something I did, or laugh because of something I had said. I want that. She deserves the best, to be treated like the best, because she is the best. I know I can be that for her, to do that for her. Which is why I'm sorry. I'll be sorry until my dying day! But it'll never be enough not for you, or her, or anyone else in this bloody room, because all you see is a monster. How is that for fucking honesty?!" His voice had grown hoarse at the last words, but it did not bother him in the slightest. He was more focused on the giant weight being lifted off his shoulders.
"Now if you don't mind, piss off!"
He scoffed at Harry's stunned expression and turned on his heel. It was here, where he was face to face with both the Headmistress and Hermione standing right at the doorway. Both faces were expressing two completely different emotions. McGonagall with a sense of pride and Hermione...a sense of shock. He couldn't tell if was the trick of the light or not, but he swore she had tears in her eyes. Whether it was happiness or... pity, he wasn't sure.
Not really wanting to deal with the two of them, Draco just brushed passed McGonagall and out of sight.
E/N: I finally figured out how to get him to apologize in front of the whole school :) so for those who were looking for that, I hope it was worth it. Although some might consider this out of character, I would like to say, Blaise wiped his mind of the dark emotions toward Hermione, so it's obviously changed him. Same goes for Hermione, she just couldn't take his lies anymore, so she was rather upset and angry.
And also I couldn't get the haunted house to work... sorry, so I took the unoriginal idea and made a dance!