Ch.66: Bat-Family Prank War
"Hehehe- AH!"
"Gotcha!" Tim said victoriously as he jumped out from one of the many halls in Wayne Manor. Danny was hanging from his trap, a rope around his tiny ankle in front of the child's open bedroom door. A note with Red Robin's symbol on it was paper-clipped to the rope.
The nine-year-old was surprised for a moment but it quickly melted away once he started laughing. Tim face-palmed when Danny giggled uncontrollably. His hair, for once, was not falling into his face and the child looked absolutely ridiculous hanging upside down. He also looked a little insane…
"Really? You falling into a trap is funny?" Tim asked. Danny, through his mirth, said something along the lines of "You look weird."
The third Bat-Kid sighed before spotting the forlorn book on the ground. It was one of the one's Danny used to read out loud to Bruce. The fact a book was on the ground irritated Tim.
He let out a sigh and ventured forward to grab it. As he did, there was a click and Tim yelped as he was caught in a net (it was one of the Bats' ultra-thin ones and spray-painted to look like the floor), hanging from the ceiling. There was a sticky note attached to Tim's trap too, only with the DP symbol on it.
Danny laughed louder.
The book-worm of the family released a loud sigh. "When you'd you have time to do this?"
The nine-year-old calmed, only a few uncontained chuckles falling from his lips. "I fell into your trap while I finished up mine. Whoopsy!"
Tim uttered another long sigh.
Dick came around one of the corners and, as he turned around, saw his two brothers. It took a lot of effort but he managed to stifle his laughs, not keen on ticking off the older of his two younger brothers. Danny was amused so Dick didn't have to worry too much about enraging him.
Tim rolled his eyes in annoyance. Danny tried to reach out and poke his fellow Bat within the net. His small arms were just about a millimeter too short. He continued to try though.
"Aw, you two are so cute~! Scrapbook picture!" Dick sang, pulling out a camera from… somewhere. He quickly snapped a photo before turning into a hallway and vanishing from sight. His cackles were cut off by a few pops and his indignant cry said he had been pranked.
"AH JASON! I DIDN'T THINK YOU WOULD EVER STOOP THAT LOW, YOU SCUMBAG!"
Tim and Danny laughed within their traps. Once they calmed, they released pleased sighs.
Then Danny pulled out a knife (world is screwed), cut himself loose, and ran away, cackling his little butt off. Tim, who had nothing sharp or pointy on him, uttered an indigent cry after his smaller brother.
"Danny, come back! COME BACK! I'll give you candy!"
"Really Timmy? Have you seen his Halloween stash?"
"It was worth a shot, Dick!"
The three female Bats all continued to watch the cheesy vampire movie on TV. They were all bored out of their minds (crime-fighting took all the adrenaline rushes out of movies, sadly) but they absolutely refused to join the prank war the five boys had decided to start.
And all because Alfred was gone for the weekend, Damian tripped Jason, Dick tried breaking up the fight, and Tim tried to save Dick's life when everything took a turn for the worst. Danny thought it was all a fun game, as Jason (ever the corrupted child) told him to get him to join.
While the immature boys had their fun, Cassie, Stephanie, Barbara, and Bruce stayed out of it and ignored all the irritated and helpless cries the boys made when they were pranked by another. There was also the occasional laughter from Danny.
Cassie gasped in shock when a bucket of ice cold water was dumped on her. Damian threw the bucket behind him and quickly high-tailed it out of the theater room, screaming. Cold, dripping wet, and ticked out, Cassie quickly gave chase, screeching curses that would make even Jason blush.
Barbara and Stephanie had their hands over their open mouths, eyes wide while they watched. They, too, were quickly pranked by Dick and Jason (Tim being the only one smart enough to know ticking off a female was not good) and were chasing their prankers around the mansion, swearing revenge in various ways.
The girls were officially in the prank war by then. The only sane one left was Bruce (wonder how long that'll last).
While that went down, Tim and Danny hung out in cupboards in the kitchen, decked out in armor made of pots and pans. Their hiding place was compromised, though, because Danny's colander helmet was too big for his head and he thought it was funny. Tim's shushes didn't help either, as he giggling too.
The weirdness of the situation, the ridiculousness they looked like, and the fact they were laughing at the entire thing only made their mirth rise in volume.
Bruce, decked out in Batman armor but cowl down, sighed as he heard another crash upstairs. He was, eventually, going to have to call off the war and make his idiotic children clean up the mess they had inevitably made before Alfred got back and make them all swear not to say anything.
The Dark Knight was sure that last one was not going to stay intact that long because all Alfred had to do was look at some of the Bat-Kids and they were like putty in the butler's hands.
The billionaire got up from his chair and walked over to his filing cabinet, file in hand. He had just opened the top drawer when a bucket of honey was dumped on him, followed by multi-colored feathers that stuck to his sticky body.
While Bruce steamed in thoughtful silence, a note drifted down from the rafters and into the Dark Knight's waiting hands. Looking at it, he saw it was a combined effort from Damian, Dick, and Jason (Tim and Danny were still laughing in the cupboards and the girls were setting up various pranks for the boys who had wrapped them up in the war).
"They're dead." Bruce said, throwing the note behind him.
A few BOOMS, CRASHES, GUN-SHOTS, And Other Such Sounds Later…
All six Bat-Kids and the Dark Knight himself stood in front of the angry butler. Danny was giggling at his father's feet, colander helmet still on his head and kitchen utensil armor still wrapped around his short arms and legs with duct tape.
Bruce was still drenched in honey but, in the fray, the majority of the feathers had fallen off and were scattered around the mansion. His left sleeve was also covered in staples and his right leg had paprika covered all over it.
Dick had been spray-painted pink with the Red Hood's emblem on his chest in red. His usual ponytail had been cut off (much to everyone's joy) in the fray. He also had a few dozen bottles of sparkles and glue-covered plastic gems dumped on him.
Jason was scorched, smoking, scraped up, bruised, and a tooth was missing but he was, overall, able to dodge all the more humiliating traps. Though he was still unaware Tim had stuck a 'shoot-me' sign on his back.
Tim looked like a lot like Danny: kitchen utensil armor and strainer hat for protection. He also had a few rope burns on his face and his clothes were a mess.
Damian had dodged all the humiliating pranks, like Jason, but fell into all the pain filled ones. He was clothes-lined down the stairs, knocked out and hung from the chandelier, tripped into a hidden hole in the floor, and nearly obliterated by a flamethrower. He would be feeling it all in the morning.
Cassie was still dripping wet, as Damian had dumped more ice-water on her every chance he got. Her hair had somehow been tied into a bow on top of her head and there was a rope of rags tied to her ankles. She was also missing one of her shoes and the one remaining was on the wrong foot.
Barbara had various hair dyes dumped onto her head and it was a disgusting brown color. It was sticky and in knotted clumps. Her shirt was inside out and Dick's Nightwing symbol was scrawled messily on her forehead.
Stephanie's hair was frizzed and smoking. She was wearing Bruce's big shirt, Damian's boxer shorts, and Barbara's pantyhose. Someone had also used makeup on her face and she looked like Joker and Harley had a kid. There was also a Bat-Symbol stamped onto her throat.
The guilty party of eight stood in the multi-colored and smoking foyer.
Alfred looked at his watch. "I was gone for barely forty-eight hours and you managed to destroy the entire mansion!"
"Just a little!" Danny commented inside his helmet. The others quickly shushed him.
The butler stood fuming but adorned a completely blank but irritated face. The other's sweated nervously, waiting for his judgment.
The Bat-Family looked on in jealously as Alfred mopped the floor while Danny stood on the plastic, yellow piece, yelling 'wee!'
The nine-year-old had tried very hard to do what he was told when it was decided that the guilty eight would do the cleaning. In the end, Alfred had taken the child's job and Danny was allowed to ride the mop while the older man did the job. Danny thought he was cleaning but really wasn't.
The other guilty seven grumbled to themselves.
SORRY FOR THE LATE UPDATE! I'm posting another chapter this afternoon and two more tomorrow to catch up! The idea above was requested by many (can't remember names) but it THEBOXGHOST113 that finally pushed me to do it.
Kadzait: She was busy all weekend.
I was... And once I got a chance, I just kinda played stupid and meaningless games on the iPad (we all do it sometimes). -.-' Now I gotta finish The Abused updates, PM 6 different people, and work on 50 Ways to Leave Your Lover. Fun.
Thanks to these people for favoriting and/or following: Devils Rivale, FlamingKenichi, ShyActiveReader, WillowTehya, OoIcelandoO, Da Chaos Mistress, Mika-Tria, Heart4Wolves, and The Man Who Inherited Madness.
Thanks to these people for favoriting and/or following me in general: ShyActiveReader, OoIcelandoO, and Heart4Wolves.
Reviews:
Letskilloctavian: I don't try to interrupt your reading time! I just post when I'm finished! Honest! :D
Grava: YES. If anyone does that, SEND ME THE LINK. XD
Scheffelman: A hilarious but dangerous meeting. XD
Halfagirl-astronaut: Hahaha! Alrighty then..! I want a boyfriend named Danny... XD And what do you mean by 'everyone'? I'd be happy to introduce you but who am I introducing you to? :D
Poohbearmorris: That was a great episode. XD And thank you~! Glad you're enjoying!
The Keeper of Worlds: I CAN ONLY DO SO MANY PARTS, DUDE! CHILL! XD (Kad: Why are you yelling? Me: I have no idea. :D)
KainVixenheim: I shall do your idea! Just gotta write it down so I don't forget (because I will)! I can only do the TT for some long! :D
BringbackDannyPhantom: *joins laughing* No he won't! XD
IWasNeverReal: Arty forgot about the whole 'alternate dimension' thing. Or, at least, in my head that's the reason. XD
Bibbledoo: No frikkin kidding. :D
Phantomknights: Just be warned. You're not the only one haunting this story (I think...). XD
GreenDrkness: YES HE IS! XD
TomgirlBre: So many ways that could go. All so hilarious. XD I love that last one! I have a spoon in my mouth. :D
ThunderWulf: Hahaha! I'm trying to think of ideas for a TT/DP x-over if it helps! :D
THEBOXGHOST113: "Simmers" is the term I use when people wallow in silenced anger. And I love 'XD'. Makes everything lose tension. XD
Lexosaurus: Robby in the TT universe really is a Debbie-downer. XD Hahaha! I love dinosaurs.