A/N: SORRY THIS IS SO LATE. I will spare you the excuses and get on to the story! So please enjoy! :)
I don't own Kodocha or any of its related contents.
'Thoughts'
"Speech"
"Flashback/Dream"
Crimson Ties
-O-
Chapter 6: All Bark, No Bite… Yet?
-O-
Im so screwed.
You know how I know that?
Because Hayama is going to find out I lied about knowing his oh so dark secret and spill my dark secret and everything I've done until now will go to waste!
Not to mention, I can't even talk to Hiro or else Hayama really will spill my deep, dark secret.
Damn bastard.
I hate him.
And I don't normally hate anyone!
I'm Sana Kurata!
I'm rainbows and butterflies! People use to get tired of me because I'm too cheery. Because I'm too optimistic. Because I never stop smiling. I use to give headaches to people because I was always spewing crap about getting along and having peace between people.
But now, now I'm bitter and sometimes mean, but not much. And I'm a little too crazy sometimes. Well, I've always been like that I guess. Fuka use to say I was uncontrollable. I would do anything I wanted, per say of my Mama, if I thought it was the right thing to do. Fuka was more of a coward, always trying to reason with me, but I was too far gone most of the time to be reasoned with.
WAIT. NO.
I'm getting distracted.
Point is, I'm not the same person I use to be. And that kind of sucks.
I know what you're thinking.
Oh boo hoo. You're such a baby. Get over yourself.
Yeah, well I liked the old me better.
The old me wouldn't threaten and fake bluff with a gang leader.
Or have a secret to hide.
Actually, I'm pretty sure the old would have still threatened the guy.
But I definitely wouldn't have a terrible secret.
Not like that one I was currently keeping.
Not at all.
"Daughter. If you have nothing to do but stare at the wall all night, why don't you make yourself useful and help Shimura with the kitchen chores?" Mama looked at me with that same stoic, but not so stoic (I know, it makes no sense) look on her face.
I was currently laying in my bed, looking at the ceiling. School tired me out. Hayama was exhausting. Saving Mami was exhausting. Fighting with Hayama was exhausting. Trying not to think about Hiro flirting with me was exhausting.
Overall, everything was just… exhausting.
"Mama, I have a problem."
She turned back around and looked at me with her motherly, questioning eyes. I swear, Mama always makes me feel like I do something wrong when she looks at me like that.
"Oh dear. What did you do?"
"Why do you assume I did something?! What if it's a problem with someone else? Or what if I'm holding in a deep, deep secret for someone and my problem is not sharing it with anyone?!"
And there was that blank stare again.
I just deadpanned at her and sighed. I pinched the bridge of my nose and set my head back against my pillow. I could feel Mama staring at me, waiting for me to say something, anything, to make sense of what I was saying. Because sometimes I just don't make any sense (which I'm perfectly fine with).
"Remember that gang leader I told you about?"
She didn't say anything, but she knew who I was talking about because I would come home everyday and complained nonstop to her about this jerk.
"Well, we kind of came to this agreement, well, more like an arrangement."
She nodded, clearly telling me to continue with the story.
"See, we kind of, sort of, maybe blackmailed each other. I made him stop tormenting people and he forbade me from talking to one of my new friends and- oh please don't give me that look because its not all bad."
Mama gave me this pointed look that usually meant I may have chosen the wrong course of action not because it wasn't the right way to do things, (Cause I'm pretty sure she'd resort to blackmail too) but because of how things fell after.
"I may have blackmailed him with a secret of his that I have no knowledge about but pretended I did?"
Ah, there was the sigh and shaking of head I was waiting for.
"While the blackmail was smart, you, daughter, have no sense of the meaning consequences."
"Consequences? Of course I do! Why do you think I'm in this mess?"
I didn't understand why Mama was telling me the opposite! I mean, she raised me! Everything I do, I was influenced by her! So if I do something wrong, she is partially to blame.
"You're in this mess because you are you, Sana."
Gee, thanks.
I pouted, glaring harshly at my mother for being so… UGH. She's supposed to be helping me. She was just standing there with Mako in her hair, making himself comfy in his makeshift pool.
THANKS MAMA.
"You know what? Never mind Mama! I will be the adult and handle this MYSELF."
Mind you, I said that in a very dramatic tone.
So DRAMATIC that my Mama didn't have words for me.
She just turned away and said "Yes, daughter. Go be the wonderfully, mature adult I know you can be."
I smell some sarcasm in there. A lot of it actually.
Curse you, Mama. Curse you.
I decided that I was done for the night. Done mulling over Hayama. Done with my Mama. Just DONE.
So going to bed was what I was going to do next. Yes. Sleep sounded absolutely perfect right now. So sleep I will do.
-O-
When I woke up the next morning, I, surprise, surprise, woke up late and rushed my way to school. I ran past all the elementary and middle school kids who started later than us (I envy them so much) and booked it to Jinbou High School.
When I got there, there were other students running to class. Meaning, I had either or less than a minute to inside, change my shoes, run upstairs, and get to homeroom.
Challenge accepted.
So I did that, my mind not occupied with Hiro or Hayama or anyone in general. I was more preoccupied with how I wanted to avoid getting after school detention. I had gotten after school detention not that long ago for being late and though most of it was just chores, it was time I could have used on doing my homework or studying.
Who am I kidding? I wouldn't have done any of those. I probably would have slept.
I ran inside pretty quick, changing my shoes really fast (so fast, that I don't ever remember being able to do that) and sprinted upstairs. I was huffing and puffing when I did (which is weird, because I had always been a good runner), but I could see the door to my homeroom open so I smiled a bit, thinking that I would make it.
Too bad that God had other plans for me because right as I started racing down the hall to my homeroom, I collided with some random person (like really!? WHY AREN'T YOU IN CLASS).
"Opf!" I said as I got knocked down on my butt. And whoever I ran into, their elbow went right into my forehead, so now I had a headache.
Then the bell chimed.
And now I have after school detention.
"What the heck, dude? Did you not see me running?" I asked as I looked up to the person who was the cause for me not making it to class.
And as soon as I did, my hazel eyes met green.
And I felt my heart in my throat, my hands getting all clammy and sweat forming on the corners of my forehead.
"I didn't think I would run into you, that's why."
Hiro was smiling down at me with an apologetic smile and a hand to help me up. While my heart was sort of racing, my head was putting up warning signs and telling me to get away as fast as I could.
Because for the love of God, I could not even be seen with Hiro because that will give Hayama that go ahead to let my secret out and that absolutely cannot happen.
"Uh- I- I gotta go!" I muttered really quick, ignoring his helping hand. I got up and ran as fast as I could to homeroom, knowing full well Hiro and his stupid green eyes were right behind me, probably wondering why I was being so weird.
When I got to class, my homeroom teacher gave me this knowing look and I sighed, muttering a quick "I know," before making my way to my seat.
I heard Hiro come in behind me and apologize for his tardiness. My sensei said something about joining me for after school detention and I mentally cursed.
The Gods must be feeling really good today.
I glanced around the room pretty quick to see if that devil was in class, and sure enough, he was sitting in his normal seat in the back with a cocky smirk playing on his lips. His blonde hair was unruly and his golden eyes especially bright.
If Hayama wasn't such a pompous and pretentious jerk, I'd say he was extremely attractive.
But no. That guy was the absolute worse.
I growled and turned away from him as soon as I could. I sat down in my seat and sighed, kind of loudly too. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Tsuyoshi and Aya both looking at me with this concerned look. Tsuyoshi turned back towards the bastard and back at me, thinking we probably bumped heads.
If only, Tsuyoshi-san. If only.
Wait.
Tsuyoshi.
Tsuyoshi was the jerk's best friend. Or use to be at least.
Tsuyoshi had to have known Hayama Akito for a while if they were that close.
He had to have known something about Hayama and some of his darkest secrets.
Oh HO HO!
TSUYOSHI WAS THE ANSWER I WAS LOOKING FOR.
I guessed the Gods had sent me down a penance early because now I knew a way to really find out Hayama's deep, dark secret.
Now that put a smile on my face.
-O-
It was frustrating.
Actually, no. It was BEYOND frustrating.
The Gods had sent me a penance early this morning, but now they were punishing me... again.
I couldn't get Tsuyoshi alone, even for a MINUTE. He was either being mushy gushy with Aya, trying to talk some sense into the asshole, hanging around Hiro, being pestered by Nakao, or God knows something other than helping her out.
Not to mention, escaping from Hiro was downright exhausting.
He was everywhere.
Every corner I turned, the stupid, green eyed, bitter boy was there. Well, he wasn't so much as bitter than she was. But, the point is still made.
Anyway, I could see him trying to talk to me, but everytime he tried approaching me, I'd turn the other way. Or whenever he was successful enough to get in talking range with me, I'd completely ignore him or find a way out of talking to him.
Because every time Hiro talked to me, I could feel Hayama's eyes on me. And I knew he was waiting. Waiting for me to talk to Hiro and spread my secret like wild fire.
I knew it was sad. My secret vs. my newfound friendship with Hiro. And me picking my secret over him, but it was necessary. While I hated myself for it, especially because I actually like Hiro as a person and a friend and I feel bad for having to leave him in the dark, I wasn't close enough to him to pick him over my secret.
Especially with what my secret pertained too.
I couldn't.
Hiro would never look at me the same.
Nor Tsuyoshi. Or Aya. Or Mami or Hisae.
I could say "Who cares? I just met them and they don't have a right to judge me." But I won't. Because I really do like these new friends of mine. And while they aren't Fuka or Takaishi, and dare I say it? Naozumi, they are great people.
I really want Hayama to rot in hell.
"Watching you scour away is really entertaining, you know?"
Excuse me while I gauge my eyes out of my head.
"This is all your fault, you stupid jerk." I said annoyingly to the only person who could ever fill me up with so much animosity and anger.
"You started it. I ended it." Hayama replied as he leaned against the locker. It was passing period. A period before lunch actually. I wanted to get Tsuyoshi alone during lunch and I was planning on asking him right now, but of course, Hayama just had to show up.
"If you weren't so rotten, we wouldn't be in this situation. No one would be." I hissed, sticking my tongue out at him.
"If you had never transferred here, I'd be getting along just fine without your dimwit self contaminating this school." He retorted, staring into my eyes.
"Are you insinuating that I'm like a disease!?" He better not have because then I'd go ape shit on this guy. I've just about had enough of him.
"I'm not insinuating. I'm stating. You're a damn infection. You're fuckin' everywhere."
"Why you son of a-!"
"Hayama? Sana?"
And Hayama's life was spared in that moment because had it not been for Tsuyoshi, I would have kicked this guys ass in front of the whole school! I mean, what the hell?! Who does he think he is to speak to me that way?
A gang leader. That's who.
"I. HATE. YOU." I said to Hayama with much venom in my voice as I emphasized each word. He just scoffed, playing me off. Why that good for nothing bastard!
"Feelings mutual, flat lands."
Oh no he didn't.
THAT FUCKER.
I've had it.
"Why you cocky, stupid, son of a bi-!"
"What the hell is going on?"
Seriously God? SERIOUSLY.
I turned around to see Hiro standing behind me, his eyes flashing from absolute hostility to genuine concern and confusion (probably because I have been ignoring him all day) as he looked between the damn prick and I. Obviously the hostility was for Hayama, at least I hoped it was.
I wanted to SCREAM.
I turned away from the guy and looked, no glared at Hayama as he wore his perverted, cocky smirk, expecting me to fail right then and there. He was waiting because he knew he had the perfect opportunity right in front of him.
"Why don't you tell him, Kurata?"
I narrowed my eyes at him, wanting nothing more than to strangle him with my bare hands. If I could, I would. I really would. But there are laws against that. But if the world was ending and walkers began to roam the earth, I'd take Hayama down, even if he wasn't a walker.
And yes, that was a The Walking Dead, reference.
There was a crowd forming around the four of us. People began to whisper and stare, spreading rumors and lies about what was going on. Whenever it pertained to Hayama, people were always talking. Even though he was intimidating and such an ass, people loved to gossip about him.
As of late, I've been involved in some of the gossip. Other students would talk about my heroics or my attempts at taming the wolf (whatever that meant). More students, especially girls, had been greeting me and thanking me for standing up to him.
I always returned their kind gestures with a smile.
"Sana?"
I closed my eyes and sighed.
This was truly cruel. Truly, it was.
Hiro Akimoto was a genuine boy, a nice guy with standards and morals. He would be a great friend, someone to easily confide in. Yeah, he came off a bit strong at the beginning, but he was just another person walking in this world with a battered heart. It wasn't his fault he became the way he did.
Which is why it hurt me when I walked away, not even sparing him a second glance. I could feel his eyes on me. Probably hurt, confused, crushed, defeated, baffled, puzzled, etc.
I hated this.
I hated this so much.
-O-
Did Hayama enjoy watching people suffer?
Was he really that much of a masochist that he enjoyed sucking the life out of people?
What could make a person so cruel, so heartless, so brutal?
I ditched my last class again, because I couldn't handle being in the same room as both Hayama and Hiro. Between Hayama's taunting smirk and his undesirable presence and Hiro's puppy dogs eyes, I just couldn't.
Not to mention, I had after school detention with Hiro in under an hour. And no doubt Hayama or one of his stupid goonies would be watching me, making sure I didn't talk to Hiro.
So I hid myself in one of the empty classrooms and started playing with my pencil.
Mama was right.
I definitely didn't think of the consequences of this action.
And there was no way I could call Fuka and talk to her about this because she would just rub this in my face. She would taunt me forever about my decision and tell me how I should have just listened and used my head to think things through.
I couldn't give Fuka that satisfaction.
"This sucks." I said out loud, knowing no one would hear me anyway.
That's when I heard the door knob and some voices outside the classroom.
Oh shit.
HIDE KURATA. HIDE.
I dove under one of the desks, praying to the Gods that hated me today that it wasn't a teacher or administrator. Because if it was, and they found me, well, who knows what they would do to me.
"I'll meet you guys outside! I just gotta grab something real quick!"
I recognized that voice.
As I poked my head over the desk, I watched as Nakao Shota was grabbing some supplies from one of the drawers, this goofy lookin' smile plastered on his face.
Shota was such a nerd. But I don't mean that in the way you think I do. Shota was a nerd, but he was one of those sweet, loving boys who tried his hardest to please anyone. He had a baby face with a baby smile and even though he was somewhat of a wimp/coward, he had his heart in the right place. The guy worked so hard, always keeping up with his grades and I think he was part of the student council because I always saw him running around with papers and advertising all the social events.
Which is why I was still pissed at the perverted jerk for hurting Shota.
"Shota!" I called out to him. He jumped, obviously not expecting someone to call out to him because this room was supposed to be empty.
He turned around, his eyes full of fright and worry. But the moment he saw me, he released a sigh of relief, a small smile gracing his lips. Nakao chuckled, grabbing the supplies I didn't even notice he dropped.
"Sana-chan! What are you doing in here?" He asked, raising a brow and- was he blushing?
I sighed, waving at him. "I just needed some time to myself. Too much going on at the moment."
"Does it have to do with Hayama-san?"
I literally "tched" as Nakao said that.
There was no reason in hell that Nakao should add the -san to Hayama's name. Haya-jerk didn't deserve that type of respect from him.
But because Nakao is a good guy and has a very forgiving heart, he continues to address to the asshole as if he was just another friend.
"Right you are, young Shota."
"I've been hearing things about you and Hayama-san lately." I nodded, resisting the urge to "tch" again, knowing exactly what he was talking about. "You should just be careful, Sana-chan. I would hate for him to do anything to you."
"Tch. Like that bastard could touch me now. I out league him in many ways." I gave him one of my confident smirks, to which he merely smiled.
"Well, you have Akimoto-san and Tsuyoshi-kun if anything happens too, I suppose."
I stilled immediately. Tsuyoshi, though I knew he wouldn't turn his back on his friend, I was fine with seeking for help. But Hiro was a completely different story. Hiro was off limits to me, in all aspects.
"Yeah… I guess so. BUT, I don't need help! I can handle that perverted jerk on my own."
Shota stood in front of me with this weird smile on his lips, his cheeks growing more red. He started laughing to himself, which was kind of creeping me out. I took a few steps back, just in case.
"Oh I'm sure. What you did for me and Mami-chan was enough indication for me. And you didn't even know me yet! You just jumped in!" Shota set the supplies down on one of the desk, nervously laughing.
What was going on with him?
"Well, someone had too. Or Haya-jerk would have kicked your ass, I'm sure."
That's when his eyes kind of fell and he became eerily silent. Replacing his nervous smile, there was now an almost sad looking frown. His demeanor changed immediately. Shota looked like someone told him he failed a test, which I'm not sure he ever has.
"Uh, Nakao? You okay?" I asked him, approaching him slowly.
"It's just, two years ago, Hayama-san wouldn't have done what he did."
Now that was the kind of information I was looking for! Thank you Shota Nakao! I think I might love you right now! Maybe he knew Hayama's dark secret!
"Two years ago you say? What happened two years ago?" I pried. Nakao bit his lip and scrunched his brows together, almost as if he was deciding if he should tell me or not.
"That's when we lost the Hayama-san we all knew and loved." He shook his head and looked up at me with these sad, painful looking eyes.
It took me aback how hurt he looked. Like he lost something very close, something precious to him.
"Wait? You guys use to like him?" That came as a shock to me because honestly, how was I ever going to believe that people like Hiro and Mami, who absolutely despised the jerk, ever liked him? Not only that, Hayama had done some downright evil and cruel things that made it impossible for me to believe he was once a well liked guy.
"He was our friend."
What?
"Excuse me? Did you say he was your friend?" The brown haired boy in front of me nodded slowly, his demeanor still somber like.
"He wasn't very close to many people, really only talking to Tsuyoshi-kun because those two had been best friends since elementary school." Point is, Tsuyoshi was the man to go too. "But, he would talk to me throughout the day, mostly about karate because I wanted to join the karate club he was forming."
Wait, is Shota telling me Hayama wasn't always a womanizing, self-centered, selfish, contemptuous asshole?
"He didn't talk much to Akimoto-san, but they would silently greet each other. Mami-chan and Hisae-chan once thought he was attractive. And Aya-chan would talk to him because of their connection with Tsuyoshi-kun."
"Wait, wait, wait." I put a hand up, stopping Shota from talking. "Are you telling me that Hayama Akito, the gang leader of Crimson Wolf, was a lone wolf?"
He nodded.
What the hell?
"What in the world happened to him?! He sounded like a normal guy, a little on the brooding side, but a normal guy!"
How does someone change that drastically!?
"Well, I think it started when his-"
"Nakao! What's taking you so long!?"
And just like that, our conversation was cut short because some idiots! came barging into the room!
MOTHER OF GOD. WHAT'S IT TAKE TO GET SOME ANSWERS OUT OF PEOPLE.
"Can't you see we're having a conversation!?" Okay, maybe I didn't need to be that forceful, but HOLY HELL, NAKAO WAS JUST ABOUT TO UNRAVEL HAYAMA'S PAST TO ME AND THESE IDIOTS STOPPED THAT FROM HAPPENING.
"Geeze, Nakao. If you wanted some alone time with Kurata-san, you could have just told us."
Wait, what?
"Dude, way to go Shota!"
Oh my god.
I looked at Shota quickly and he looked absolutely mortified. And his face was burning red, like a tomato! I then turned back around towards Nakao's friends.
"Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! You guys have the completely wrong idea! Me and Shota are definitely not like that! We're most definitely just friends! Tell them Shota!"
I turned towards Shota for some reassurance, but, instead of seeing him agreeing with me profoundly, he was extremely pale and looked… heartbroken? Why in the world would Nakao look heartbroken?
Unless…
Unless Nakao liked me?
Wait, did Nakao like me?
"Of-of course not guys! Don't be silly! Me and Sana as more than friends? Psh, no way!" His voice was trembling, almost like he wanted to cry, but he was smiling. And I looked at him with actual concern because if there was one thing I didn't want to do to Nakao Shota was hurt his feelings.
"Really? Wow. That sucks dude."
"Maybe next time, Shota."
The jerks! I growled, clenching my hands tightly. I glared at them as I heard them yell something about waiting for him outside the room.
"Well, I should probably should get going. Really busy with student council stuff, you know, Sana-chan?" He laughed, bitterly might I add. He looked absolutely dejected, like if the life was sucked right out of him.
My face fell and I dropped my glare, looking at Nakao with a sad look.
"Shota… it wasn't meant like-"
"It's really okay, Sana-chan. I know you didn't mean it like that. But, I'll see you tomorrow okay?" He waved at me with a forceful smile before disappearing out the doors.
The Gods must really hate me today because I basically just hurt the sweetest boy in this entire world without even meaning too. I groaned and kicked the desk next to me, thinking of all the things I've already messed up.
While I should be happy about the few details of Hayama's past, it wasn't as important as the way I hurt Shota or the way I was most likely hurting Hiro.
And Hiro, I would see in a few minutes because I had after school detention with him. And no doubt he would be trying to talk to me, to figure out why I was acting so strange and ignoring him. He could even pin me if he wanted!
When the bell chimed, I sighed, begrudgingly making my way to my homeroom class, where it was basically do or die for me. I sulked my way over there, the students looking at me like if I was some sort of circus freak. My guess is they are accustomed to seeing me either pissed off or confidently happy.
Before reaching homeroom, I could see Hayama talking with some girl, a devilish and hungry smile on his lips. I narrowed my eyes at him, as if I was letting him know that he wasn't allowed to do anything, not if he still wanted his secret to stay a secret.
Oh who am I kidding. I don't even have a fake, fake secret to cover up the fake secret.
But I did it anyway.
He glanced my way, scowling at me. His face made a 180 change and the random girl backed off a bit, most likely frightened by his sudden change in countenance.
Don't even try it. I kind of told him, with my eyes. I swear, I could hear him growl.
Then I heard Hiro's voice and I'm 100% percent sure all color left my face. My confident smirk fell and his returned as he knew the reason to why I changed so fast.
Let's see how you get through this. His eyes told me, his golden colored irises laughing at me while I went to my impending doom.
Gracefully, I might add.
Instead of his usual smirk, he actually laughed. Which was weird. Because it was like a normal laugh; a laugh that Hiro could have, or Tsuyoshi, or Nakao. Not the laugh of a despicable gang leader. Or the laugh of a guy who almost drowned my friend, or choked me in the hallway or threw me against a locker.
Don't croak.
I rolled my eyes, ignoring the way my heart kind of softened at his easy laugh. It made me think of what Shota (ugh, that's also something I have to fix) said about him once being this normal guy. A normal guy that I could have been friends with, maybe even best friends with.
But instead of worrying over the golden eyed jerk, I should really start worrying over how I was going to handle being in the same room with Hiro for an hour without talking to him.
When I reached the room, I took a deep breath and walked inside. My sensei gave me an apologetic smile, which I kind of didn't appreciate because she was the reason I was stuck here. But whatever.
I walked in, ignoring the way Hiro and his green eyes were just staring me down. I ignored him and leaned against one of the desk, my arms crossed out in front of me, waiting for my sensei to tell me what chore I had to do so I could finish it quickly and head home.
"Akimoto-san. Kurata-san. You both know why you're here so let's get to it, shall we?"
Yes, let's get this hour over with.
I didn't dare look back.
"Kurata-san. I'm going to need you to wipe down the windows and sweep the classroom, along with restocking the cleaning supplies. Akimoto-san, you will be in charge of rearranging the bookshelf and restocking the cupboards with the needed supplies."
I nodded and heard Hiro say "Yes mam" or something like that.
I went straight towards the closet where the cleaning supplies were and grabbed the windex and paper towels, doing everything I could to ignore the intense stare I was getting from the boy behind me. After I grabbed the supplies, I went straight to the window and sprayed.
Our sensei was sitting down, reading a book, which I was really thankful for because that meant Hiro wouldn't talk to me. And as long as she remained seated in that chair of hers, I was golden.
I did as she asked, finishing the windows early and fast enough, but still took the sufficient time needed to make sure they were perfect. After all, when you lived in my house, you knew how to clean windows. Shimura made sure of it.
Sweeping was pretty easy too. I cringed at the nasty stuff left on the floor though. I came to a conclusion that students we're disgusting and didn't have any type of respect. I mean, I knew I could be somewhat of a pig, but that's in my own personal time.
The crap that's on this floor is revolting really.
I heard the chair scrape and I looked up almost immediately.
"I have a meeting in 10 minutes so I have to leave early. I trust you two will finish and put everything away?"
No.
No. No. No.
NO.
"Yeah. No problem sensei." Hiro answered and all I could do was stare at my sensei with pleading eyes, begging her to stay.
"Perfect. See you two tomorrow. And don't be late." She offered a small smile as she walked out.
I would have found that funny had I not been internally screaming right now.
I stared at the door, feeling my heart sink to my stomach and lump form at my throat. Not bothering to look back towards Hiro, I tried to hide myself in the supplies closet, my hands trembling as I put things away.
"Sana?"
Fuck.
I screwed my eyes shut, trying to ignore him and his green eyes and alluring voice and charismatic charm and holy hell, I needed to stop.
"Did I do something wrong?"
Please stop talking to me, Hiro. I really don't want to hurt you.
I continued rummaging through the supplies closet, ignoring him.
"Because you've been ignoring me all day, running away everytime you saw me."
It's not that I chose to ignore you, willingly. But I have a secret that the pervert knows and I can't afford for him to spread it.
I bit down on my lip, my hands feeling clammy and head spinning. Why oh why did Mrs. Mitsuya have to leave? Why couldn't she just stay those extra ten minutes?
"If it has to do with the other day with Hayama and the drowning incident, I'm sorry I let you handle it on your own. I know you said you could take him, but still."
That's what he was apologizing for? Dude! I could care less!
I could hear his footsteps come closer and closer. My heart was beating loudly in my ears, my mind racing. I couldn't concentrate as I finished stocking the remaining supplies. I could hear him saying my name over and over, his voice growing closer and closer.
Seriously Hiro? Just leave me alone, PLEASE.
It wasn't until he put a hand on my shoulder that I jumped. I "eeped", most likely startling him because he retracted his hand.
Damn it all. Damn it.
Damn you Hayama Akito.
"I know we aren't close or anything, but I thought we were coming along as pretty good friends. And this whole ignoring me kind of sucks, especially because I don't know why you're doing it."
I'm doing it because I was blackmailed too! Because I blackmailed a stupid gang leader who has no heart and I lied about knowing his secret. And now I'm screwed because I really don't know his secret!
I couldn't even concentrate on the chore I was supposed to be doing and I wanted to be done with it. I wanted to just leave already.
"And you know the most infuriating part of it all? The fact that you could talk to the bastard, but not to me. Just knowing he has more of your attention is pissing me the hell off."
Fuck it.
Giving the closet one last look, I stood up and slammed it shut. I put my head down and clenched my hands at my sides.
I was angry. So frustrated. I could feel the tears filling at my eye rims.
No. I wasn't allowed to cry.
I didn't cry.
I'm sorry, Hiro. I'm so sorry.
I grabbed my bag off my desk, kept my head down, and ran out the door, trying so hard to block out Hiro's protest and shouting of my name. I screwed my eyes shut and felt the light dabs of the tears that filled my eyes.
Damn it all.
I hated crying more than anything.
And I wasn't crying because I liked Hiro or anything like that. I was crying because I hated hurting my friends and I had done that twice today. I was crying because Hayama Akito was a selfish prick. I was crying because of my stupid secret. I was crying because Hayama had the type of power over me that allowed him to control whom I talked too and who I couldn't. I cried for allowing myself to have such a secret in the first place.
And it was just like I said; Hayama or one of his cronies we're going to be around to watch me. And what do you know? The gang leader of Crimson Wolf himself was sitting outside the gate, a smirk settled on his stupid, ugly face.
But I didn't have the energy to fight him today.
Because he absolutely defeated me in this battle.
I casted him a quick glance, our eyes locking with each other for a moment. The last thing I wanted to do was show him my tears; I didn't want to give him satisfaction of knowing he made me cry, but underneath my tears, I was furious. I was raging with anger. And I wanted him to know how much fury I was in.
His smirk fell almost immediately, which wasn't what I was expecting. And his eyes kind of grew wide, almost as if he was surprised to see me crying.
But I didn't stick around long enough to see what he would do next.
Because I ran. I ran away like the coward I was being.
And I didn't care.
A/N: Sana's in a heap of trouble isn't she? Hello my lovelies! I'm back! Sorry for the long hiatus! I just kind of lost the will to write and left this sitting in my computer for a few months, as you all know. But I'm back now, thanks to some of my reviewers :)
Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter! A lot of inner conflict with Sana and some light on Hayama's past. Things will start falling into place because people's past will be revealed soon enough. So stay tuned to that. My other stories should be updated shortly too. I've been story hopping, writing as much as I could to get things done! So stay on the look out! And I'm going to try my hardest to update biweekly like I said I would from the beginning.
Let me know what you think! Reviews are deeply appreciated :)
So until next time!
-Dark Waffle