A/N: I got emotional when I wrote the dream sequence in this chapter. I was listening to James Vincent Mcmorrow's Cavalier and Matt Corby's Resolution—which was a total coinsidence since I had the songs on shuffle—and it somehow just worked, the whole slow but romanticalness of the songs just went with what I was writing, so I had the songs in a playlist and on repeat and I just wrote. I don't know if it worked in the end, but I like the way it turned out, hope you do too.
Dedication: Westeast. You're total dedication to this story is the reason why I'm still writing it and it's still working :). This is is as much your baby as it is mine :)).
Shout_Outs:
perpetuators: Right?! She just had to ruin what could have been the best moment of Luke's life! Luke's life keeps getting worse, poor thing. But you know what they say: always a storm before the rainbow and all that.
Tidy: She totally us! For real? What was a few more seconds?! He is, he doesn't know what he did to Luke to make Luke act the way he's acting, poor soul.
Naughty Jesus: Vacation begins in the next chapter because my brain hates me and doesn't want to do as I plan :(. But yeah... It's a good thing that you read it again, it means you like it enough :).
QuickerDraw: Yeah, it's probably Luke since he's going through so much drama and he can't even tell anoyone about it :(, poor Luke.
kittykat202: Here you go :).
Duncan: It's a good thing for me :)). I'm glad you're enjouing it.
AnimeBoyADC: Thank you :). It is pretty sad with all the emotional stuff going on. It'll get better though.
Westeast: I wanted her and Morgan to be more connected to the children. In the show they might be sorta close to the kids but to me they always came across as those rich parents who have children for the sake of it, but never really have time for them and the kids just become the nanny's problem, yah know. So I wanted them to be closer to the kids here, be more connected to them.
Max: Here's an update for you :). Enjoy!
Ryan: Here you go. Sorry it's late, hope you like it though :).
Disclaimer: It's disclaimed!
To Have Your Arms Around Me…
"I don't care if it's not right/ To have your arms around me/ I want to feel what it's like/ to take all of you inside of me…"
– Madonna, Forbidden Love
""
Luke got downstairs and found the family in the living room. Emma and Zuri threw glares his way but said nothing, Ravi didn't even acknowledge his arrival and it hurt more than anything. Nobody said anything about the kitchen incident and Luke was sure Christina and Morgan had said something about it before he came down to join them.
Luke sat on the single couch, far from the rest of the family. He saw Christina frown but ignored her. He didn't want to feel bad for worrying his mother, but he didn't want to sit next to anyone.
"Okay guys, I'm assuming everyone's almost done packing?" Morgan asked. Everyone nodded they're heads—Emma nodding her's more enthusiastically then everyone else. "Good. Our flight is schedule for three pm tomorrow which gives us pleanty of time to get ready.
"Now the finalised sleeping arrangements are as follows: Zuri, Emma and Jessie will share a room, Ravi and Luke will share another and Bertram will get his own room. Ravi, we've already arranged for Mrs Kipling to live in the animal house which is at the back of the hotel."
Ravi smiled widely, happy that his over–grown lizard would be able to join them. It was such a beautiful smile, filled with pure happiness. Luke had missed that smile like nothing else. Even though he'd probably never get that smile again, he was happy that Ravi could still make it, still find things that could make him so very happy, even simple things like getting Mrs Kippling to join them on a family vacation.
"Is everyone all right with that?" The kids, nanny and butler nodded. Luke shrugged because really, there was nothing he could do now, everything was finalised, he'd be sharing a room with the reason for his wet dreams. In different circumstances that would've been a good thing.
"All right then!" Christina said with a smile, clapping her hands together. "Why don't you guys head on upstairs to finish packing and to make sure that everything you need is packed."
Everyone nodded and got up, heading upstairs or in Bertram's case, to his room behind the kitchen, while talking excitedly about what they'd be doing when they got to the hotel.
"Uh Luke, could we talk to you for a minute?"
Luke stopped at the second step with a sigh but turned around and headed back to where his parents stood, waiting for him. He didn't meet either of their eyes, instead opting to look out the balchony. It looked like it would rain. Good! For once it would be fitting to Luke's mood.
"We don't really know what's going on with you lately, Luke, but we're hoping that this trip will help you resolve it."
"It'll probably get worse," Luke thought glumily, but nodded turning to look down at the floor.
"We hate having to do this while we're away, but you're grounded for the next three months," Morgan said.
"But dad—" Luke began but was cut off with a hand in the air.
"No Luke. You punched your brother and we know about the comments. I don't know what's going on between you two, but you can't act like that and think that there won't be consequences."
Luke sighed. He did deserve being punished. He'd done the crime, so he'd just have to do the time. He nodded, chewing on his lower lip, his hands shoved deep into his denim pants into fists, fingernails digging into his palm. He deserved being punished.
"You know you can come talk to us any time you want right?"
"I know," came the whispered response.
"All right, kid." Morgan and Christina moved closer, wrapping their arms tightly around Luke in a comforting hug that had Luke almost weeping like a child. But he held it together, and when his parents let go, a kiss to the forehead from each person, he nodded then headed upstairs, locking himself in his room, setting his alarm to wake him early so he'd complete his packing and with a tired sigh falling into bed and going right to sleep.
""
Luke and Ravi are in bed, curled up together. Luke knows he's dreaming, he os sure of it. Why else would Ravi be in his bed, touching him willingly? It has to be a dream. It is. A good one too, but one that will probably break his heart when he finally wakes from it. But Luke doesn't care, not yet. He's enjoying soaking up Ravi's body heat, whether it's real or not.
Ravi's placing light kisses on Luke's neck, adding gentle bites every now and then that have Luke shivering in pleasure. A hand carresses his back, under his shirt, touching his skin. The touch relaxes Luke, calms him.
"I love you," Ravi whispers quitely before kissing Luke's lips. Luke kisses back desperatly, shutting his eyes tightly.
"This is a dream." It sounds a lot like Luke's own voice. It nothing but background noise though because right now, Luke doesn't care. His kiss turns more desperate than before, he kisses Ravi hader, his hands caressing into Ravi's dark locks.
Ravi responds, pulling Luke closer, kissing Luke back with the same desperate hunger that the freckled teen gives. They make out like the teenagers they are for what feels like forever. Luke can literally feel the softness of Ravi's lips, the heat of his body, the even better heat of Ravi's fingers against his skin.
Luke never wants it to stop, this is a dream he never wants to end.
Luke wants it to always be like this, for Ravi to be this accepting, this gentle yet rough, to drive Luke crazy in this way. Like wants Ravi to kiss him just like this, to hold him exactly like this. To never stop, never let go.
"I love you," Ravi whispers softly against Luke's lips before before once more kissing the teen deeply.
Luke clings to Ravi as if the teen will somehow slip away from his hands, disappear from his world. He will, Luke knows he will. The moment that Luke wakes up, this Ravi won't exist, this Ravi will be gone.
This isn't about sex, this dream has nothing to do with sex. This was about Luke's need for Ravi to just be there, for Ravi to just love him. It's about Luke's need to hear Ravi say he loves him, to feel Ravi hold him like this, just like this.
"Don't hate me," Luke whispers voice breaking from the emotion of asking for this, for admitting out loud that he was afraid. "Please don't hate me."
"Never," Ravi whispers back, kissing Luke's forehead, pulling him that much closer to him. "I'd never hate you. I love you."
Luke feels his heart tug at the words. He convinces himself that this is true, that this is real. In his dreams he finds peace, in his dreams he finds solace. His dreams are true, they are the only truth, what keep him going when it gets rough, when it's dark and cold and he wants to give up.
"I'd never hate you."
Luke can feel them, the tears that spill from his eyes. He doesn't want to cry, not now, not here. He's supposed to be happy here. This is his solace. "I..." Luke swallows harshly and shakes his head. "Don't hate me, please don't hate me."
Ravi moves away from Luke, looks at him with confusion then it changes to something akin to disgust. Luke can already feel his heart breaking, already knows what's going to happen before it does. He shuts his eyes tightly, begging for this not to happen. "Change the dream, change it now!"
It doesn't work. "I hate you!" Luke's heart stops for a single moment before it starts to beat harshly in his chest. "You disgust me!"
"Please," Luke whispers brokenly. He can barely say the word, struggles and stumbles over it. His on his knees, they feel wet, like he's kneeling on grass after it's rained. "Please, Ravi."
"Do you think I'm like you? Do you think I'm sick like you? You need help!"
A weak, pathetic sob escapes Luke's lips. He holds himself tightly, almost as if he's trying to keep himself together. It's because he is, or else he'll shatter and break into a million pieces and no one will be able to fix him.
"I hate you."
"Rav—" he chokes on the word and sobs, curling up into himself as he weeps like a child. He refuses to look up, refuses to see Ravi's face. He saw the disgust, saw the hatered, he doesn't want to see more, doesn't dare to because then he won't even have his dreams. "Change the dream!"
"I wish I'd never met you. I wish I never knew you. You disgust me."
"Change the dream! Please, change the dream! Make it happy, bring my Ravi back. Please come back. Don't hate me, Ravi, please. I love you. I love you. I love you."
"Well I don't love you. You make me sick!"
Luke's shaking, his fingers dig into his arms. He wants to die, he wants to wake up from this horrid dream. He can't take it, he just can't take it. This was supposed to be a happy dream, this was not supposed to happen.
"You're going to rot in hell. I hope you die a slow tortured death!"
Luke does break then, not physically, but mentally. He realises that he really can't keep himself together, that there's no reason to really. Ravi hates him, Ravi will never love him, not the way that he loves Ravi.
"I'll never love you."
"Luke!" It's another voice, one that's familiar but Luke can't place it. His too distressed to know for sure who it is. "Luke, come on sweetheart, it's just a dream, it's a bad dream. Wake up, honey, please wake up."
—
Luke did wake up only to find that he was weeping like a child. He clung desperatly to his mother's arms as the blonde woman tried desperatly to comfort her distraught son. Luke felt as if someone was cutting off his air, like someone was gripping at his lungs. He felt as though his heart was being squeeze, being pulled right out of his heart.
"Mom! Mom!" Luke screamed desperatly, still holding onto his mother, as though she were his anchor, like she was the one holding him together now.
"Shh baby, it's okay."
Luke couldn't breathe, his chest hurt, his heart hurt. His eyes widened at the fact that he couldn't get enough air into his lungs, that he was suffocating. The room spun out of control, making him feel as though he'd throw up. He felt as though he was going insane, as though he were losing himself.
"Luke, Luke honey, breathe," Christina said gently, trying to calm her hysterical son.
"Mom!" Luke gasped desperatly, gripping the woman's arm even tighter. He couldn't breathe! He felt as though he was going to die. The walls were closing in on him and it freaked him out like nothing else. "Mom!"
"Please Luke, breathe!" Even Christina sounded panicked then. She realised that things were getting worse, that instead of Luke relaxing he was freaking out even more. "Morgan!" the blond shouted when she realised that Luke wasn't okay, that her trying to coax him into relaxing wasn't going to help. "Morgan!"
Morgan rushed into Luke's room a few minutes later. He took one look at his wife and son and jumped into action. Before Christina could say anything, morgan had Luke in his arms and was rushing out the room and down the stairs. Christina waisted no time, following the pair, neither parent bothered with the alavators, instead both taking the stairs.
Morgan got Luke in the back seat and Christina sat with her son, trying to get him to calm down. Morgan hopped into the front. Christina handed Morgan the car keys and in a few seconds flat he had the car started and was driving out the covered parking.
It wasn't even half an hour later and the pair was rushing Luke into the hospital. The fact that Luke was still hyperventilating scared the pair even more, and he was still weeping like a child.
A pair of nurses and doctor hurried to them, the doctor shouting orders at the nurses. One of the nurse grabbed a wheel chair and they had Luke in it and were wisking him away in an instant. A nurse that had been at the work station stopped the Ross parents from following the doctor and had the pair sit down—her name tag told the pair that her name was Lilly.
Lilly got the Ross' to sit down in the waiting room and she disappeared for a ten minutes and returned with two blankets and a pair of slippers. She handed the blankets to each person then handed Morgan the slippers. That's when the two realised how inappropriately they were dressed. Christina was in a pair of pink, polka dotted silk shorts and a white tank top with slippers while Morgan only had on draw-string pyjama bottoms and no top or shoes on.
The pair thanked the nurse and she smiled kindly at them. She disappeared for half an hour this time, and when she returned she was carrying to cups of steaming tea. "To help," she said in a soft voice. Morgan took both, thanking the nurse once more then handed one to Christina who took it but made no attempt to drink it.
The woman sat anxiously waiting news. Her hair was dissheveled and her eyes were puffy and red from crying. She'd never been so afraid in her life. Luke's panicked voice kept playing in her mind over and over again. He'd sounded desperate when he'd called out for her. For a moment she'd been afraid he was having a heart attack.
"Chrissie," Morgan whispered gently, an arm wrapping around Christina and pulling her close.
"He looked so distraught, Morg," Christina whispered, choking slightly at Morgan's name at the end as fresh tears fell.
"It's going to be okay, doll, I promise." Christina smiled just slightly at the nickname, leaning her head against her husband's shoulder. She was his Barbie doll. Morgan wiped away Christina's tears and pulled her closer to him, kissing the top of her head.
During their waiting time Morgan had filled out a form quicky at the front desk before hurrying back to his wife. He was giving comfort to his wife and she was returning it, they couldn't stay away from each other too long or one of them would break down.
Half an hour more passed before the doctor that had taken Luke—Dr Ellana Patel, a tall blonde woman with a kind round face—walked over to the Ross' who got up quickly and hurried towards the woman. The doctor smiled reassuringly, seeing the stressed out parents. The smile gave the parents slight relief.
"How is he, doctor?" Morgan asked, his arms around Christina and the woman clinging to one arm.
"He's all right," Dr Patel said, in a thick English accent. "We managed to calm him down and get him to sleep. It was a pretty bad attack, but luckily there won't be any lasting damages." Morgan and Christina sighed in relief. "We want to keep him in at least for the day just to make sure he's all right, but if he doesn't have any more attacks then we'll release him tomorrow morning."
"Thank you, doctor."
"It's no problem."
"Can we see him?"
"He's sleeping now, but you can see him for a little while." The doctor led the pair into Luke's room and allowed them inside.
The freckled teen was looking pretty pale, but beside that he looked fine. Christina hurried to her son's side and took his hand, happy to find it warm. She touched Luke's forehead, kissing it gently. Morgan exchanged a few more words with the doctor before joining his wife, holding her with one hand and touching Luke's arm with the other.
"Tell me he'll be okay," Christina whispered, blinking back tears as she looked at her sleeping son.
"He'll be all right," Morgan promised. Christina sighed but nodded.
"Why won't he talk to us?"
"I don't know, doll. He will when he's ready."
"Can you think of any reason why he'd be like this? Why he's fighting with Ravi so much?"
"I don't know, hon, I can't think of a reason why. Maybe they're fighting over a girl or somethign."
"That could be it. Luke did have a crush on Rosie and Rosie seemed to prefer Ravi's company. Maybe that's it."
"Maybe. But we can't be sure. Whatever it is, I just hope they get through it."
"Me too."
The pair spent another hour sitting in luke's hospital room, holding onto each other and holding their son's hand before Morgan left, Christina refused to do so, so a bed was prepared for her.
She stayed up for most of the night, but eventually did fall asleep curled up on a chair, holding Luke's hand.
...TBC...
So the ending was dodgy, whoops, mah bad. But yeah. Hope you enjoyed the sad little thing which wasn't supposed to turn out like this. Originally, Luke was supposed to have a sexy dream then they were supposed to leave for the family vacation, but nope, brain says no. Ah well, hope it turned out okay.
Anywhoo...
(",)