A/N: Lookey–lookey, an update. Sorry this'll turn out lame):, but enjoy anyway!
Notes:
No New Notes
Dedication: to Westeast and whatthefoster
Shout_Outs:
Naughty Jesus: Aaaw, thank you (:. Sorry the update took so long but hopefully it's a good chapter... hopefully.
MoneyBall07: Sorry it's late but it's here... OMG you serious? I'll def send a PM or two. I hope I don't annoy you though.
kittykat202: He'll be all right... here's a new chapter, enjoy.
Puckett: Thank you (: Here's a new one.
coco1987: Aaaw thank you so much *blushes*. Enjoy!
Gratsu-of-fire-and-ice: Zuri knows what's up. Lmao, I have weird dreams all the time *LoL*. Thank you... He'll have to learn to control himself coz Zuri will give him 'the look'. Oh it's no problem at all, promise.
Westeast: A little happiness was needed, even if it's only a little. They do, even though he's being a jerk they still care about him and care for his well being. He probably wouldn't have said most of the stuff he said. It was a moment of vulnerability. Yeah, they both needed that visit, it did both of them a little good I think. Sorry the update is so late, but I'm back now and I'm ready for action.
emijonks2000: Sorry it's late but it's here.
perpertuators: He's a sweetheart. It's going to go to shit soon enough.
r5AusllyRaura: Thank you so much. They are beautiful!
spies 12: It's all right (:. Thank you, here's the next one even though it's disgustingly late. She will do more than just tell him she knows but you'll find that out this chapter. Aaaw, in won't give up on it, I promise. I may take time updating but I won't give up on it. No, I don't mind, I like reading :D.
BookWormDiva501: Thank you (": Thank you so much! I'm sorry it took so long but it's here. Yerp, there'll be one where he just let's loose. Not yet, but it'll happen.
Kigen Dawn: Thank you (:. Well I shall write one that will have you curled up in your bed weeping! I am, slowly but it's happening.
Guest: Aaawa, thank you so much! I shall write a chapter that will give you no choice :D! Thank you, sMut will happen... eventually ;).
Guest: Background music that works but also wishes you hadn't listened to it while reading. Aw, but I don't want you to cry but I suppose because it's angst... Enjoy the new chapter.
nachopokemon: Thank you (:. Hope you enjoy this.
jukebox56: Thank you.
Guest: Sure.
Hika Hitachiin: It was, wasn't it? Yes, and sad too.
OrangeFoxx18: Sorry it's late but here yah go!
Meow: Sorry, sorry, here you go! Enjoy :D
kjay15: It's probably not as soon as you'd like but here it is. I hope this one doesn't disappoint you either and out enjoy it too.
Disclaimer: No!
To Have Your Arms Around Me…
"I don't care if it's not right/ To have your arms around me/ I want to feel what it's like/ to take all of you inside of me…"
— Madonna, Forbidden Love
""
Morgan and Christina were at the hospital first thing the next morning. They helped Luke pack up his small bag of belonging. They were both unusually quiet, but Luke figured it had a lot to do with them being worried about his health. He didn't ask them why they were quiet though, because he didn't actually want to hear them answer.
When his overnight back was packed, Morgan took it from Christina's hands silently. He kissed the top of Luke's head, whispering how much he loved him then left the room just as quietly. It was almost eerie, the way the man moved so quietly around the room. He was usually so loud and cheerful, seeing him this way bothered Luke a lot.
Christina stayed with him Luke while Dr Patel did final check–ups on him to make sure he was really fit to go. The doctor smiled, nodding her head when she'd done all the required check–ups and had written down a few notes.
"Everything looks good here," she said positively. Christina smiled, nodding her head, looking too relieved about the news.
Luke had to wonder if maybe she thought there'd be complications and he'd have to stay another day. That would've been a bad thing since Luke wasn't planning on spending any more time in hospital. He really needed this vacation, needed to get away from the confined space of his house.
"You are now free to go, Mr Ross."
Luke nodded his head, hopping off the bed. He was already heading to the door when Christina stood and thanked Dr Patel for her help and shaking the woman's hand. Luke left the room while his mom spoke to the doctor. Luke didn't want to hear any more about his health, didn't want to hear his mother worrying, and didn't want to hear the way her voice would catch as she tried not to cry.
When he got outside he saw Morgan standing by the car. The man was tapping away at his phone, not paying much attention to anything else. Luke walked over to the car and hopped into the back. Morgan looked up for a moment, smiled at his son—Luke didn't have the energy to smile back, instead leaning back against the back seat and shutting his eyes—then looked back down at his phone.
It was another five or so minutes before Christina finally got to them. She got into the car and Morgan followed her in, getting into the driver's seat. The pair sat there for a moment, not moving. Luke finally sat up and looked at them. He sighed, noting how hard Christina was trying to hold back tears while Morgan tried to comfort her.
"I'm fine," Luke said, touching Christina's shoulder. "I promise."
"I know, sweetie," Christina said. "It's just… I've never seen you like that and— —" The woman took a deep breath. "You okay, that's all that matters." Morgan smiled at his wife, squeezing her hand then finally he and Christina buckled up, Luke did the same in the back, and Morgan started the car.
[]
When they finally got to the got to the airport, Luke found that the rest of his family was already there, waiting. Christina said they'd already boarded but hadn't been waiting for long. She said Jessie had texted her only ten minutes ago to tell her they'd arrived, so nobody would be in too bad of a mood.
Luke only nodded, not really paying attention to anything being said. He was mostly just trying not to worry about how small the plane was. It had nothing to do with claustrophobia—Luke didn't have that—nor did he fear flying. He just didn't know how to handle being in just a small space with Ravi. He was kind of really dreading seeing the other teen again. They hadn't really spoken in a while and even though Ravi had spoken to a 'sleeping' Luke, the freckled boy doubted his brother would want to speak to him when he's awake.
And even if Ravi did try, Luke didn't doubt that he'd have some nasty, sarcastic response because he was too afraid of saying anything remotely nice because he might accidently admit his feelings about his brother. God, Luke wished he was just a kid again. A stupid, dumb kid who'd had a crush on his nanny. Things had been so much easier when he'd been infatuated with Jessie.
When they stepped out the car, Christina took her son's hand and smiled encouragingly at him. Like really wished he had enough energy to fake a smile back but he couldn't, his heart too heavy. Instead the teen looked down at the floor and gently pulled his hand from his mother's own. He heard Christina sigh, but the woman didn't fight it.
Before his mother could say anything, Luke was making his way towards the private jet. He kept his head down as he climbed the steps and stepped into the plane, only raising it enough to see where everyone was sitting before picking the furthest seat from Ravi as humanly possible in the suddenly too small plane. Ravi didn't even look up when Luke came in, and though it hurt for obvious reasons, Luke was glad his brother was paying no attention to him.
The freckled teen sighed as he sat down on an empty seat by the window. He figured that seeing the outside would give him the illusion that he wasn't only a few steps away from Ravi. Zuri sat down beside him, looking at him with those all–knowing eyes. Luke tried to ignore his sister, he really did, but he could feel the eyes scanning and analysing and it was freaking him the hell out.
With a huff, the freckled boy turned and demanded to know why Zuri was staring. The girl just continued to stare before she pulled a cellphone from her pocket and dropped it on the table in front of Luke. He looked down at it and was surprised to find that it was his cellphone. Next she dropped his headphones and he frowned. He hadn't even remembered that he didn't have his stuff, but Zuri seemed to have remembered for him.
"Don't say I never did anything for you," the girl said, getting up from the seat. She dropped her huge teddy bear on the seat she'd just vacated. "Seriously, don't say I never did anything for you." Then she turned on her heels and went to sit with Ravi and Emma.
Luke frowned, not sure what to make of his sister's actions. He looked at the teddy beside him then at his cellphone, not sure what to think. He didn't think there was anything weird on the teddy, like maybe it was rigged with a spy cam or something, but after years of pulling pranks, Luke was a bit paranoid. Vaguely he remembered them buckling up and taking off with Morgan saying something witty through the intercom that had the rest of the family laughing. He couldn't for the life of him remember what it was because he was too distracted with staring at his cellphone.
After a moment of just staring at his phone suspiciously, Luke finally picked it up. He plugged his headphones in and put them on. Unlocking the phone Luke's frown only deepened when he saw that Zuri had been on the internet, and more specifically on a website. The read the URL and felt his heart beat in the most painfully uncomfortable way—like the beginnings of another panic attack.
Luke breathed a few times, not sure what to make of anything. He looked up and around the plane—thankfully Christina was sitting at the other end with Jessie and Bertram while Morgan had entered the cockpit and would be acting as co–pilot for the flight.
Emma and Zuri were huddled up on a couch, looking at something on Zuri's tablet. Emma was talking animatedly about whatever it was that she was showing Zuri and the Ravi—who was sitting across from them, mostly on his phone—just looked at his sisters with amusement. No one was paying any attention to Luke and his dilemma. Good!
The teen bit his lip, his leg bouncing nervously as he looked back at his phone. He took a few quite deep breaths—he didn't need to alert his mother that he might be having another attack, he didn't want this trip to be ruined any more than it already had been—as he scrolled down, looking at the page that was left open for him. He read a few of the titles of the links and he didn't know whether he should laugh or cry. Zuri was… she was something else.
"Don't say I never did anything for you."
Luke's phone pinged, indicating a text from someone. Luke stared down at his phone, surprised to see the new app that had been added without his knowing. The boy looked at his youngest sister again, because he couldn't quite believe what was going on here.
"Don't say I never did anything for you."
The freckled boy opened the app and scrolled through it. He already had a few contacts in it, though it seemed there was only one contact that was actually talking to him. There was a message and after only a few minutes of hesitation, Luke opened it.
How–to–make–it–in–Hollywood: Can we talk?
Luke looked up again and his eyes met with Zuri's. The girl narrowed her eyes at him for a second before looking down at her phone. For a second she seemed to contemplate something but then decided because she got up from her seat and walked over to Luke. She sat down across from him, looked at him for a second then looked down at her cellphone and typed something and must've pressed send because Luke's phone pinged again, indicating a message from her.
The_All_Knowing: Don't mess it up!
Luke looked at her, confused. He didn't even know what to think right now he was so freaked and confused. Of course Zuri knew, of course she did. But what she'd done with what she knew…
The_A…: He could help you as much as you could help him.
Luke stared down at the message for a moment then typed a reply even though Zuri was literally sitting an arm's length away from him.
Luke: Who is 'he'?
The_A…: Don't act dumb!
The_A…: I didn't spend hours scouring the deep bowels of the internet for you to mess up a friendship that could help you work through your shit.
Luke: You kiss your mother with that mouth?
The_A…: Don't be an idiot, Filbert.
The_A…: Has he sent you anything?
Luke: Who?
Zuri sighed across from Luke, sounding exasperated. He didn't look up at her this time, he couldn't look at her.
The_A…: Lord, I'm seriously going to smack this boy, I swear!
Luke couldn't stop the chuckle when he read the text. It appeared he'd laughed too loud because everyone was looking at him, Christina smiling a little too happily at the sound. For the first time in a long time Luke was able to return the smile.
Luke: Okay, sorry.
The_A…: I'm serious though. I didn't spend hours of my time hunting this stuff for you only to mess up.
The_A…: He's nice, I'm serious.
The_A…: I talked to him as you and got to know him (I saved his messages for you so you can know him too).
The_A…: It's actually not hard to talk as you because you're a fucking idiot boy!
"Hey!" Luke said out loud. Zuri looked at him, giving her best 'seriously?' look. Luke rolled his eyes at his sister.
The_A…: I'm serious about this though, Luke.
The_A…: If you mess this up I'm going to seriously hurt you.
The_A…: He's also going through similar things as you, you know
The_A…: YOU KNOOOOOOW!
Luke: I know.
The_A…: You going to ask me how I know?
Luke: No.
The_A…: Because I know everything.
Luke: Of course you do…
The_A…: Has he sent you anything?
Luke: A message.
The_A…: And you didn't reply?!
The_A…: Fucking idiot boy!
The_A…: Fucking talk to him then!
The_A…: What's the matter with you!?
Luke sighed but went back to the message by 'How–to–make–it–in–Hollywood'. It was just a stupid name, but when Luke sent back a text he found his own screen name was even more ridiculous.
Luke: You couldn't have picked a better name than Hip–Hop–King–Pin?
The_A…: What? Like you wouldn't have used something similar.
The_A…: And just shut up! That's an awesome name.
The_A…: Now go talk to him!
Luke sighed again and went back to his new friend.
How–t…: How is your holiday going?
Luke looked up at Zuri. She rolled her eyes at him, looking super exasperated.
"Give it," she said, holding her hand out for cellphone. Luke handed it to her and she read the text. She rolled her eyes again and handed it back. "You're such an idiot."
"I don't know what you've been saying," Luke replied.
"How is the holiday going?"
"Has it even started?"
"You're in the plane on your way aren't you?"
"Yeah… okay."
"Idiot!"
Hip–H…: It's going all right. Nothing eventful has happened yet though.
Hip–H…: My sister's being a little bitch.
How–t…: Lol, how sucky for you then.
How–t…: Which sister? Emily or Azanda?
Luke looked at Zuri, not even sure what to say about the names. Only Zuri, honestly.
"What? What happened?"
"Nothing happened."
Hip–H…: Azanda.
How–t…: Aaaw, I thought you liked Azanda.
Hip–H…: I lied. I lie sometimes.
How–t…: I've noticed…
How–t…: So how's the brother thing going?
{
Luke: He knows about *IT*
The_A…: Of course he knows about it, you idiot! He's part of the fricking chat room!
The_A…: You're such an idiot. My god!
}
Hip–H…: He's not talking to me…
Hip–H…: Not even looking at me.
How–t…: Well that's what you get for being an asshole to him.
How–t…: You should talk to him.
Hip–H…: Yeah, no. that won't be happening anytime soon.
How–t…: Why not?! You love him, don't you?
Hip–H…: That's why I can't talk to him! What if I accidently blurt out how I feel.
How–t…: Oh!
How–t…: Oooooh…
How–t…: You're an idiot.
Hip–H…: You're not the first person to say that.
How–t…: I don't doubt it.
How–t…: Just stop being a jerk and talk to him, yeah?
How–t…: If you love him as much as you claim then you'll at least try to be friends again.
How–t…: You already said you guys used to he close right?
How–t…: Try going back to that...
Hip–H…: I wish it was that easy... I've screwed up way too much for it to ever go back to that.
How–t…: Okay, I get that but come ooooon! You gotta at least try. Even if you don't go back to what you had, just being able to say hello to each other would be a huge accomplishment.
Hip–H…: I don't know.
How–t…: COME ON!
How–t…: You're being difficult stinker! Just *try* okay?
Hip–H…: If he'd look at me. I don't think he even wants to be in the same room as me.
How–t…: Well obviously, you did almost break his nose.
Hip–H…: I panicked.
How–t…: You still not going to tell me why you did it?
Hip–H…: It was a scuffle.
How–t…: Okay...
Hip–H…: And I may have landed on top of him...
How–t…: Oooooh I see... and then?
Hip–H…: And then he was there looking at me and he just looked so beautiful and then my brains shut down.
How–t…: You almost kissed him?!
Hip–H…: And my body may have responded.
How–t…: Well shit!
Hip–H…: Exactly!
How–t…: Okay so maybe you freaked the boy out.
Hip–H…: I think I did more than just freak him out.
How–t…: No, you punched him too.
How–t…: The poor thing must be so confused about your behaviour. He probably wants to help you but you're pushing him out.
Hip–H…: I doubt he wants to even look at me right now.
How–t…: But that's all your fault though.
Hip–H…: I know!
How–t…: You gotta try fixing it though. You can't just ignore it and think it'll go away.
Hip–H…: I know!
Hip–H…: But I don't know how to fix it.
How–t…: You can always start by talking to him.
Hip–H…: We'll see…
How–t…: You're just like Ben!
{
Luke: Who's Ben?!
The_A…: His brother! They got their shit together.
Luke: You mean they *got* together?!
The_A…: Yes, I mean they got together.
Luke: Oh!
}
Hip–H…: How am I just like him?
How–t…: You always want to avoid your problems. You think if you don't talk about it then it'll just somehow magically go away. Seriously, that's not how life works. You gotta work your shit out.
Hip–H…: Okay.
How–t…: Yeah no, not okay. See, Ben says the exact same thing. He goes 'Okay' but doesn't do shit about it. Like serious? How is that going to help you?
Hip–H…: It's easier avoiding things then to confront them.
How–t…: Yeah, and if I'd ignored his shitty behaviour I would never have known how he felt about me.
Hip–H…: Which is exactly what I don't want my brother to know! I don't want him to know how I feel.
How–t…: Why?
Hip–H…: Because!
How–t…: Because why?!
Hip–H…: Because I'm not good for him! He deserves so much better than me. He's smart and kind and he deserves someone who'll treat him well.
How–t…: And you can't do that?
Hip–H…: I'm his brother! He would never, EVER, go for me!
How–t…: Ben said the same thing.
Hip–H…: But you and Ben are different. You wanted Ben the same way he wanted you!
How–t…: I won't be able to convince you to talk to him, will I? you're just going to spend your relaxing holiday being a dick, aren't you?
Hip–H…: No.
How–t…: Okay. Well talk to me when you've at least gotten your shit slightly together.
[How–to–make–it–in–Hollywood has logged off]
Luke sighed, dropping his phone on the table and scrubbing at his face.
"What did you do?" Zuri asked, sounding disappointed.
"I didn't do anything," Luke grumbled, staring at his phone.
"'Kay," Zuri said but grabbed Luke's phone before he could go for it. He didn't try to fight it though because he knew Zuri would find out the truth about the conversation one way or another.
The girl scrolled slowly through the conversation while Luke dropped his head on the table not–so–gently and pulled at his hair while he waited for Zuri to return his cellphone. He looked up when he heard Zuri snort but the girl paid no mind to him. Instead she dropped his cellphone on the table and picked up her own, putting her headphones on and shutting her eyes.
Luke looked at his sister as though she'd grown an extra head or something. The lack of reaction to what she'd read made Luke really nervous. He needed to know what she thought but at the same time he didn't want her to acknowledge that he was sick in the head for even having to go through something like this. Zuri didn't comment though, didn't even open her eyes, and just hummed along to the music playing on her tablet.
After a moment, Luke took his cellphone back and he switched it off and shoved it in his pocket all the while not sitting up. He could hear Ravi behind him, giggling at something. Luke really wished he didn't feel a pang of pain at hearing the sound, wished he didn't feel longing.
"You're not sick," Zuri said suddenly. Luke looked up at her and found her looking at him with that look. "You're not."
"What am I?" Luke finally asked.
Zuri was quite for a moment before answering, "You're a teenage boy in love." Luke snorted, rolling his eyes and dropping his head on the table again. "You are." The girl sighed. She picked up her phone and typed something on it quickly before pushing it towards Luke. He looked at it for a moment before picking it up.
You've been in love with him for years Luke, way longer than you even realise.
Luke looked up at her again and had to ask, "How do you know?"
Zuri gave him her infamous 'are you serious' look and sighed. "I know everything Phil, remember that. Now shut up, I'm reading Supernatural fan–fiction and Dean's about to declare his undying love for Sam."
Luke sighed, dropping his head back on the table. God, Zuri was something else, seriously.
"You know I'll listen if you need to talk. I may not know what to say, but I'll listen."
"Why are you so understanding about this though?" Zuri didn't answer and when Luke looked up he found her looking closely at him, as though she was studying him.
"It's no different to Emma and Rossie's relationship."
"But they aren't rel— —"
"Technically, neither are you."
"Legally." Zuri snorted, rolling her eyes at her brother.
"Legally you're an idiot."
"Thanks."
"Sleep now before I smack you." Luke grinned at Zuri before dropping his head back on the table—a little more gently this time. Zuri went back to humming, running her fingers through Luke's hair gently.
Eventually Luke fell asleep to the sound of Zuri's gentle humming and her fingers gently carding through his hair...
…TBC…
That conversation was so awkward, mah lawrd! But anyway, here yah go.
Anywhoo…
(",)