Chapter 37
Disclaimer: I do not own anything. Everything belongs to their rightful owners and I am not making any profit from this.
AN: Thank you to all who have added to alerts, read, reviewed or any combination of the three. It means a lot to me.
AN2: I do not owe the writing in italics, the poems belong to their rightful owners.
AN3: Sorry about not updating yesterday. I spent most of the day playing taxi to my older siblings which meant I had very little time to write.
Twenty minutes after they leave the hotel the cars arrive at the church. In the first car is Coulson, Melinda, Angela, Skye, Tripp and Sharon. In the second car is Steve, Tony, Pepper, Bruce, Maria and Bucky, and in the final car is Sam, John, Clint, Natasha, Fitz and Simmons.
"You going to get out Pal?" Bucky asks his best friend as the car has stopped but Steve, who is closes to the door hasn't gotten out.
"It's time Steve." Bruce tells him, "I know that you don't want it to be, but it is." He tells him.
"We're right here Steve, right beside you." Pepper tells him.
"You need to open the door Steve." Tony tells him, "You've got to do this." He says.
For a couple of minutes the other five people in the car are positive that Steve isn't going to do anything, and Bucky is considering all the ways he knows to get his brother out of the car, but then he finally opens the door and gets out of the car the others not far behind him.
Over the next hour, after a meeting with General Jacobs to finalise the security plan, the group greats everyone who arrives for the service. Clint, John, Tony, Bucky, Bruce, Pepper, Maria, Fitz, Simmons, Sam, and Natasha doing their best to help Steve, Angela, Melinda, Coulson, Skye, Sharon and Tripp.
The guests seem to be a combination of military personal, Including James Rhodes, government officials, former agents and other people who Peggy influenced or inspired in some way, most of whom one of the group knows.
"If you could all make you way inside the service is about to begin." Father Reed says and everyone makes their way inside.
While half of the group sit in the second row, Tripp, Maria, Angela, Sharon, Phil, Melinda, Skye, Bucky and Steve, sit in the front row. Maria doing so at Tripp's request and Bucky doing so because Steve asked his best friend to, not just for himself but for Skye as well, something which Melinda and surprisingly Coulson agreed with.
Because they are opening the service Skye and Sharon head straight up to the podium instead of their seats.
Once everyone has taken their seats and the church is quite Skye and Sharon take a step closer to the podium and Sharon starts to speak,
"Hello, My Name is Sharon Carter, and this is my cousin Skye Coulson. Peggy Carter was my Great Aunt and Skye's Grandmother. It was her wish that 'I thank the god, that I have lived by Elizabeth Craven,' was read today, so we're going to read it for her." Sharon says exchanges a look with Skye before taking a deep breath and beginning to read,
"I thank thee God, that I have lived
In this great world and known its many joys:
The songs of birds, the strongest sweet scent of hay,
And cooling breezes in the secret dusk;
The flaming sunsets at the close of day,
Hills and the lovely, heather-covered moors;
Music at night, and the moonlight on the sea,
The beat of waves upon the rocky shore
And wild white spray, flung high in ecstasy;
The faithful eyes of dogs, and treasured books,
The love of Kin and fellowship of friends
And all that makes life dear and beautiful." Sharon reads, the entire time fighting to keep her voice steady, forcing herself not to cry. Once she has said the last word just like the practiced Skye takes over and reads the last verse, something which Sharon is truly thankful for as she is positive that she wouldn't have gotten through it.
"I thank Thee too, that there has come to me
A little sorrow and sometimes defeat,
A little heartache and the loneliness
That comes with parting and the words 'Good-bye';
Dawn breaking after weary hours of pain,
When I discovered that night's gloom must yield
And morning light break through to me again.
Because of these and other blessings poured
Unasked upon my wondering head,
Because I know that there is yet to come
An even richer and more glorious life,
And most of all, because Thine only Son
Once sacrificed life's loveliness for me,
I thank Thee, God, that I have lived." Skye reads having a hard time keeping herself from crying, but she is able to do so because like Clint suggested she looks out at the audience and looks at her mother the strongest person she knows and she draws strength from her.
Once Skye finishes reading the poem Skye and Sharon head back to their seats. Once Skye sits down Bucky reaches over and grabs Skye's hand and doesn't let it go as Coulson puts a supportive hand on Sharon's leg.
"Today we bid farewell to not just an amazing woman but a national hero, a woman I considered it to be an honour to call my friend." Father Reed says. As soon as he started to talk Skye reached over and grabbed her mother's hand wanting to tell her that she is there for her.
For the next several minutes Father Reed talks about Peggy and her life and family before inviting General Jacobs up to the podium who speaks for several minutes about all the work that she did, what she achieved and everything he knew her to be, why she was a hero.
Once General Jacobs finishes speaking Father Reed once more approaches the podium, "I would like to invite one of Peggy's oldest friends Steve Rogers to say a few words." Father Reed says and after getting a supportive slash kind of push up from Bucky Steve walks up to the podium and places what he wrote down so that he can read it.
"When I first meet Peggy I was trying to prove to everyone that I was worthy that I can do more, be more and it didn't take me long to realises she was doing the same." Steve says looking out at the audience and as he does his eyes find Pepper, Tony and Bruce, and as soon as they do he feels stronger, "I knew Peggy in a time where very few people would give her the respect she deserved, but she never once let that faze her." He says, "The first time I met her Peggy knocked a soldier who wasn't respecting her to the ground with a single punch, and she was never shy about putting anyone, including me, in their places when they needed to be." Steve says and when his eyes drift over Melinda and Angela he notices that there is the tiniest hint of a smile on both of their faces which makes him realises that they know exactly what he is talking about, "Over the last few years I have gotten to know Peggy once more, and I have learnt about everything she has done and while I am incredibly proud of her, I'm not surprised." Steve reveals, "I always knew that Peggy was going to do great things, and that she would never let anything hold her back, which is why I've done my best to continue her work because it was the least I could do." Steve says choosing his words carefully so that he doesn't imply that SHIELD is still active, "Peggy was a lot of different things to a lot of us, but to me she will always be one of the people who had faith in me when nobody, including myself, did." Steve says feeling himself getting choked up as he starts to say the final thing he wants to say, "I will mourn for the loss of my friend, but I will never forget all that she taught me, the person she was, or what she meant to me, and I will do my best to ensure that her legacy lives on for decades to come, just like it should." Steve says fighting back the tears, "Thank you." He says before walking back to his seat. Once he is sitting Bucky squeezes his knee and Pepper, Tony and Bruce reaching over from behind to give his shoulder a squeeze in comfort.
Once Steve is sitting down after regretfully letting go off Maria's hand Tripp makes his way to the podium,
"When I was fifteen I lost my Uncle Mark in the September eleven attacks and I was furious, and upset and didn't want to say goodbye to him, didn't think I could. The morning of his funeral I was determine that wasn't going, that I couldn't until Grams came in my room and sat down on the floor right next to me and gave me advice that I have never forgotten, advice that she once more gave me the day she died. She told me that death is the one thing we can't completely stop." Tripp quotes almost able to hear his grandmother's voice as he speaks her words, making him feel less alone, "That as much as we love someone the day will always come to say goodbye. That you'll never be ready for that day, that you can't be ready for that day, but it will come and even if you don't think you are you are strong enough to get through it you will. It took me a while to accept that, but it's also something that I believe to be true." Tripp reveals, looking at Maria, needing the support that she gives him, "But I also believe that the only reason I'm strong enough to get through today, get through her death is because of her, because of the strength she gave me." Tripp says determine not to let himself cry, "I've experienced a lot of loss during my life and spent a lot of time alone but no matter what happened I always had her." Tripp reveals, "No matter what I needed she was just a phone call away." Tripp reveals looking at his mother and thinking about all the times that she wasn't around but Peggy was, "She gave me a place to stay when I needed one, advice even when I didn't, and most importantly she gave me unconditional love and support." Tripp says and as he reads forward he realises that after what Steve just said he wants to say something else instead of what he wrote so he folds up the piece of paper he was reading off of and puts it in his pocket, "Captain Rogers said that Grams was different things to different people well to me she was my Grandmother and a hero, the person I look up to the most, the person who I want to be like and the person I will miss every single day." Tripp says as tears start to fall down his face, "Four days ago the world lost a hero, a woman who has scarified more than you could possibly know in the service of protection, but I lost something more than that, I lost my north star the person I could always count on, and who's death will leave a hole in my life that cannot be filled." Tripp says trying to think of a way to finish what he is saying before he can no longer be understood because of his crying, "No matter what happens or what I do, I will always love and miss my grandmother, bye Grams." Tripp says looking over at the coffin.
Knowing that she is next Melinda stands before Tripp makes his way back down to his seat and before she goes up to the podium she gives her nephew a hug one, which he gladly return. Once the Aunt and Nephew end their hug Tripp goes and sits down were as soon as he is sitting Maria puts an arm around him and Melinda heads up to the podium.
Once she is up at the podium Melinda looks to her daughter and husband and her two best friends who are sitting behind them, she sees Natasha give her the thinnest of nods, her way of telling Melinda that she can do this, and once she does she looks down at what she wrote and starts to talk,
"If it wasn't for Peggy Carter, I probably wouldn't be standing here right now, and I definitely wouldn't be the person I am." Melinda says, "My biological parents died in a car accident when I was a year old, and I was raised by my grandparents. They were great, but it wasn't the same as having parents." Melinda reveals, "I didn't know what having a parent was like until I was fourteen, until I met Peggy." Melinda says, "I met Peggy after writing letters to her for a school assignment and ever since she responded to that very first letter she watched out for me, looked after me." Melinda explains, "And when I started to go down a bad path, when I wouldn't listen to anyone, she got through to me, she took me in, and for the first time in my life, I knew what it was like to have a mother and an amazing one at that." Melinda says, "Peggy let me into her family and treated me like a daughter and her children treated me as a sister, while I saw her as my mother." Melinda says looking out at Angela, "Peggy saved me in so many ways, and helped me in so many more." Melinda admits, "She never forced me to do anything, she didn't force me to change, she just gave me a choice to." Melinda tells everyone, "That's who Peggy was she thought that if someone was going to change they had to prove that they actually wanted to, 'you can't force it. You can't make someone change if they don't want to' she would say. When she gave me the choice to change, the chance to, I took it because I realised that I had someone I wanted to change for. I wanted to become a better person for her, to be someone she could be proud off and I hope that she was." Melinda tells everyone and when he eyes drift over to Steve he gives her a nod like he is telling her that Peggy was proud of her, "Peggy was the biggest influence in my life, she was my Mom and I'm going to miss her so much, but it is time to say goodbye and continue to be someone she could be proud of." Melinda says then turns to look directly at Peggy's casket, "Goodbye Mom." Melinda says, refusing to let the tears that are threatening to fall, fall, before walking back down to her seat and sitting down. Once she is sitting down next to Coulson he puts his arm around her and she leans into the hug as Father Reed once more approaches the podium.
"Our service will now draw to a close to close the service I once more invite Sharon Carter and Skye Coulson up who would like to read a poem that they feel describes how Peggy would like to be remembered." Father Read informs everyone, "I was also asked to inform you that starting at two thirty at The Fairfax hotel at Embassy Row you are invited to have a few drinks and share memories in remembrance of Peggy." Father Reed says, "Ladies." He asks and Skye and Sharon get up and walk to the podium.
"She is Gone; By David Harkins." Skye says,
"You can shed tears that she is gone." Skye reads.
Or you can smile because she has lived" Sharon reads.
"You can close your eyes and pray that she will come back." Skye reads.
Or you can open your eyes and see all that she has left." Sharon reads, and that's how the rest of the poem progresses Skye and Sharon each reading a line.
"Your heart can be empty because you can't see her
Or you can be full of the love that you shared
You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday
Or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday
You can remember her and only that she is gone
Or you can cherish her memory and let it live on
You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back
Or you can do what she would want: smile, open your eyes, love and go on." Sharon finishes.
Once Skye and Sharon finish reading the poem they stay where they are as music starts to play and Coulson, Melinda, Steve, Bucky, Tripp and Tony stand up and walk to the casket.
Melinda and Tripp lift the front of the casket, Tony and Coulson take the middle and Bucky and Steve take the end. Once Melinda, Tripp, Coulson, Tony, Bucky and Steve are walking down the aisle with the casket Sharon, Skye, Angela, Maria follow and about a minute later the rest of the SHIELD personal follow behind then a few minutes after that the rest of the guests follow.
Once everyone is outside Melinda, Tripp, Coulson, Steve, Tony and Bucky put the casket into the back of a horse drawn carriage. Once the casket is secure and the carriage has left to go to the cemetery, the six of them along with the rest of the group, after being stopped by quite a lot of people to offer their condolences had to the cars that are waiting to take them to the private burial.
Forty minutes after the end of the funeral the group arrives at the cemetery. Also present are about a dozen other people that Peggy requested be there.
"Between Dad and Mark, just like she wanted." Angela comments as a full military service burial begins and fifteen minutes later it ends with Angela being given a flag as Peggy's casket is lowered in the ground. As her casket is lowed the military personal present salute it and Skye, Sharon and Tripp reach out and grab each other's hands, Tripp standing between Skye and Sharon.
Once the compete burial ends everyone one of the other dozen people present come up to Angela, Melinda, Tripp, Skye, Sharon, Coulson and Steve to offer their condolences.
"So I guess you're going now." Tripp says to his mother once the members of SHIELD, Pepper and Angela are the only one's present.
"Yes, I have to." Angela tells Tripp, "But I'll keep in touch." She assures her soon as everyone with the exception of Maria, Melinda, Skye, Sharon and Phil take a few steps away to offer them their privacy.
"Be careful." Tripp says trying his best not to let the fact that she is once more disappearing on him affect him.
"I will, you be careful to." Angela tells her son.
"Always am." Tripp says before giving his mother a hug, "I love you Ma."
"Love you too Tonio." Angela tells her son and once they break apart Angela gives her sister a hug, followed by her nieces.
"Look after yourself Phil." Angela tells Coulson.
"You too Angela." Coulson respond and the pair hug.
Once Coulson and Angela end their hug Angela gives her son one more hug before walking off to a waiting cab.
"I'm sorry Tonio." Melinda says to her nephew as she notices the tears in his eyes as Maria puts an arm around him.
"It's okay, I'm used to it." Tripp responds.
"Let's go to the hotel." Tony says, "There are several beers with your name on it." Tony tells him
"That sounds really good." Tripp says and everyone, with the exception of Steve, head back towards the cars, when they notice that he isn't with the rest of them, Tony, Pepper and Bruce walk back over to Steve who is standing by Peggy's grave.
"Steve?" Pepper asks.
"I'm not quite ready to say goodbye." Steve comments.
"Steve, that's not her anymore." Bruce says walking over and standing in front of Steve, "Peggy's gone, that's just a body, but as long as you remember her, as long as you remember what she meant to you and what she was like then she will never truly be gone." Bruce tells him, "She will always live inside you." Bruce says reaching over and grabbing Steve's hands.
"It's time to let go." Tony tells him, "To say goodbye."
"I don't know if I can." Steve reveals as tears roll down his face.
"You can Steve." Pepper says putting an arm around him, "I know you can, and we're going to be right here, we're not leaving until you're ready to go." She tells him, "But you've got to ask yourself, what would Peggy want you to do, would she want you to stand here?" Pepper asks. .
"No, she would want me to live." Steve answers in a quiet voice.
"Then that's what you've got to do Capsical, live." Tony tells him as he grabs onto Steve's left hand as Bruce let go of it while still holding onto his right.
"For Peggy." Steve says, his voice so quite that none of them can here, "Bye Peggy." He says and then surrounded by the people he loves the most he makes his way back to the waiting cars.
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