Chapter 22: Jaunedice
AN: First things first, pairings/ships. Those just got brought up, so I kinda have to address it. Keeping a long story short, yes they'll happen, but not for a while. However, I will be more than happy to continue teasing them to Kassidy's chagrin, as I've already done a couple times. And no, I'm not saying who's being paired, I want to see what you guys come up with. Also because teasing is fun.
Secondly, Meet the Brawler will get its revision and rename with the next upload. Also on that note, the Introduction fricken finally got its update. With that change, I've gone through a bunch of the chapters to make minor edits to retain consistency. Consistency's a big deal for me, so I like making sure it's kept to the letter. And for those of you who don't like this one either… I gotta admit, I couldn't really think of a way to make it up to my liking either. But I've spent enough time on it, that it hits all the major points I want it to hit and I'm calling it good enough.
Also, holy crap five thousands views, guys. And forty follows. I'd like to think these are signs that I'm doing something right. So glad so many people are regularly enjoying the work that I put out.
In this chapter, Kassidy has a pretty shit day, and ends it in one of the worst ways possible for a depressed someone to end a shit day.
(Perspective: K)
Her day started crappy, and it just kept getting worse. It's been an hour since she woke up; her usual workout would start now on a normal day. Almost falling off the treadmill, she eventually got it turned off and sat on a nearby bench. Fifty four minutes of a seventeen mile an hour sprint had left her spent. Her legs felt like lead, and her lungs were on fire. But it wasn't enough for Kassidy.
Bob had figured out how to turn her school textbooks into audiobooks, so her workouts were usually spent listening to the readings she was supposed to do through her earpiece. Sure, she got through the history reading she sorely needed to catch up on. But after moving to Grimm Studies, her mind betrayed her as it went back to her nightmare. She had snarled and turned the volume up, but it wouldn't go away. Instead, it turned to other memories, other nightmares. To others that she'd watched die, that she'd killed, that she'd failed to save. Shaking her head furiously, Kass tried to focus on the results of her run. She got her speed bumped up another mile an hour, and held the sprint for three minutes longer, compared to when she started at Beacon. She was getting faster.
Not fast enough.
Another snarl, and the gunslinger pushed her palms into her eyes. The weight machines… her muscles didn't like getting bigger, they never did. She might have put twice as much work in as anyone else, but her muscles seemed to need ten times as much work to get the same strength. Still, slowly, she was getting stronger.
Not strong enough.
She hit the back of her head against the bench. Her eyes fell upon the punching bag. All the extra training with her team, and this week with Glynda, had their dividends as well. From what she knew of biology, when a bone breaks it heals stronger than when it got broken. With broken bones of some kind becoming a near-daily occurrence, she could already feel her body adapting to the new circumstances it found itself in. She might not have aura, but the biological impossibility that was her sack of flesh had its own ways of adapting. Of getting tougher.
Not tough enough.
The gunslinger let out a cry, a maddening yell for nobody to hear. She knew that her mental state wasn't the best. One didn't simply see the things she saw, do the things she did, and come out of it in one piece. And it always got worse with the nightmares. But this? Things have never started this badly. And they only ever got worse. C'mon, girl! You're a Smith! Don't forget how Dad raised you! You're better than this! You're better than –
Not good enough.
Feral eyes returned to the punching bag. Standing up, she walked over without bothering to wrap her hands, knowing full well what the rough leather would do to them. If adrenaline or exhaustion couldn't let her forget, maybe pain would.
Twenty minutes in, and her knuckles were a bloody mess. Flesh was shredded. Bone was starting to show through on a couple of the fingers. But she didn't care. Kassidy could still hear them as they tried to kill her. Could see their eyes roll back and their final twitches cease as they died. Her face was a mess, soaked in sweat and tears, mouth at this point contorted into a semi-permanent snarl. Suddenly, a hand manifested on her shoulder. Not knowing who it was, she turned around and swung and whoever dared interrupt her little masochistic display.
"Kassidy! Are you alright?" Emerald eyes under a red ponytail were full of worry. She'd just swung for Pyrrha Nikos' face, the champion's swift reaction the only thing keeping the fist from impacting.
The gunslinger sighed heavily. Now she was really tired, and for some reason she couldn't figure out why. She glanced at a clock on the wall before replying, "Five o' clock. You're here earlier than usual."
Pyrrha shook her head. "Some screaming woke me up this morning. I laid around for a little while, but couldn't get back to sleep." The Mistralian champion walked over to the first aid kit kept on the wall. "You need to stop going so hard. You can't just keep putting your body through this kind of punishment. It's going to give up on you sooner or later."
"Now you're sounding like Bob."
"Great minds think alike." Returning with some gauze, tape, and antiseptic solution, she was about to start on the bandages before Kass ripped them out of her hands.
"I know how to treat a wound. Lord knows how many times I've had to do it." Nikos almost looked hurt, but then she just nodded and took to her usual treadmill. Kassidy decided to change the subject. "How's Jaune been doing? He seemed really out of it after that duel with Cardin."
Pyrrha shook her head. "He was still taking it pretty badly before we went down for the night. Poor guy, he tries so hard. One of the things that makes him a good leader. He never gives up. Never will give up."
Need to keep this conversation going. Letting me think straight for once. "Work ethic is a good start. But it can only get a person so far." Looking up from the impromptu patch job on her hands, she continued. "I've been spending a ton of extra time training with Yang and Glynda recently. Helped out a lot. Been getting new skills. Yang taught me how to punch without breaking my fist every time."
Nikos stopped running and looked up. "What are you saying?"
"I'm saying that some extra training would help Jaune a lot, and he happens to be partnered with the best fighter in the school." Pyrrha blushed, which Kassidy rolled her eyes at. "Oh, quit acting so humble. It's true. Honestly, I'd offer to teach him myself, but I'm pretty sure that's the definition of 'the blind leading the blind'. High quality anti-training right there."
The champion bust out into laughter, loud and clear. It took her a minute to fully calm down. "I'm sorry, Kass, the way you said that was too funny. Still… you're right, he could use the help, and I'm in a better position to help him than anyone else." Stepping off the treadmill, Nikos walked over and stood in front of her. "I'll talk to him tonight, then. Thanks for the idea."
Suddenly, the gunslinger found herself in a hug, and Pyrrha was far more somber and concerned. "What about you, though? You're not alright, and don't even try to tell me that you are. We've spent enough time working out together that I know a bit about you, how you react." Emerald eyes looked up into hazel. "I know it was you that was screaming."
Kassidy pushed the redhead to arm's length and kept her hands on her shoulders. "I can handle it. I can take care of myself. Been doing it long enough I better know how." Breaking the contact and picking up her bag, the blonde walked out of the room.
"Now, have any among you been subjugated or discriminated for your faunus heritage?" A number of hands shot up. As per usual, Oobleck's history class was interesting, although Jaune was somehow still finding a way to sleep through it. Kassidy paid attention with almost manic zeal. She felt she was slowly losing her mind whenever she didn't have anything to focus on. Noticing a few hands raise, the gunslinger thought for a moment. Don't see what the big deal is myself. So they have extra body parts. Whoop-de-freakin'-do. She shook her head, not wanting her mind to drift off again.
"Now, which one of you young scholars can tell me what many theorists believe to be the turning point in the third year of the war?"
"The Battle of Fort Castle." Weiss was proud as ever to show off her knowledge.
"Precisely! And, who can tell me the advantage the faunus had over General Lagune's forces?"
"Hey!" She looked over, and Jaune was rubbing his head. Cardin's snickers made the source painfully obvious. I do not have the time nor the patience to deal with your bullshit today, Cardin.
"Mr. Arc! Finally contributing to class! This is excellent, excellent! What is the answer?"
Jaune stalled while looking around. Next to the gunslinger, Pyrrha was making motions regarding night vision. "Um, binoculars!"
Oobleck shook his head disappointingly. "Very funny Mr. Arc. Cardin! Perhaps you would care to share your thoughts on the subject?"
The local bully didn't miss a beat. "Well, I know it's a lot easier to train an animal than a soldier."
Kassidy couldn't contain herself anymore. Pyrrha looked like she was about to rebuke him, but Kass beat her to the punch. "You're a special kind of idiot, you know that Cardin?"
"What, you got a problem?"
"Yeah, I'm allergic to stupidity." The gunslinger counted on her fingers. "First off, the Faunus are not animals. You'd do well to remember that." He growled, but she continued. "Secondly, have you tried training an animal? Sentient beings are much easier to work with. And thirdly, the advantage the faunus had was night vision."
"Many faunus are known to have nearly perfect sight in the dark." Pyrrha came in for the save. Crap, forgot about that part. Thought they had goggles or something. "General Lagune was inexperienced and made the mistake of trying to ambush the Faunus in their sleep. His massive army was outmatched, and the General was captured. Perhaps if he'd paid attention in class, he wouldn't have been remembered as such a failure." The redhead ended with a smirk at Cardin.
"Mr. Winchester, please take your seat." Oobleck again shook his head disappointingly at the bully after he got up to deal with the two girls physically. "You and Mr. Arc can both see me after class for additional readings."
It's official. Today couldn't have been any worse if I had tried. At least it's all over now. The day had been a complete trainwreck. After history, Kassidy couldn't seem to focus her mind on anything. She got in a huge argument with Weiss at the lunch table which killed the mood for everyone. Glynda had decided today was a great day for another duel, this time putting her against Sky Lark. It had been a brutal, bloody affair, but after eight minutes she eventually came out on top. Ever since combat training, she was on a short fuse. She got into two more arguments with Weiss during team training, and another one with Yang, before eventually Ruby called the whole thing off early.
What led her to her current location, however, was Glynda contacting her to say that the evening practice had to be cancelled due to work. Kass understood, of course. And she didn't mind, she needed to make a trip to Vale anyway. Currently, she was on the roof of Beacon. Night had fallen, and the broken moon, perpetually in a full moon phase it seemed, lit up the shingles. She took the last sip out of a drink she brought up with her, and then set it aside to open up a second. A cool breeze and a beautiful night sky. For the first time all week, she relaxed. Her head had stopped trying to argue with her for the time being. She felt like she could stay up here forever.
Some voices a short ways away interrupted her reverie. She tried ignoring them for a little bit; maybe they were just students out to enjoy the night as well. But then they kept talking, voices getting louder. Sour mood and short fuse returning, she resolved to chase off whatever kids had ruined the peace and quiet. Making her way across the roof, and stumbling more than once on the uneven shingles, she was about to yell at them when she heard something that made her freeze.
"I didn't earn my spot at this academy. I lied. I got my hands on some fake transcripts, and I lied."
Peeking around from a section of roof, she could see Pyrrha and Jaune on a flat portion that she regretted not seeing earlier. Deciding that they could serve as her entertainment for the night, Kassidy listened to the blonde spill his guts out before he chased Nikos off. Chuckling sadly, she was about to talk to him before she noticed Cardin climb up out of his window and join Jaune before summarily blackmailing him. Her blood boiled, but she decided to wait it out for a while longer.
Eventually, Winchester climbed back down to his room while Arc was on the ground. Confident nobody else was coming up, she chose this moment to strike. "Well, that didn't go very well." Jaune's eyes tried to bulge out of their sockets, and she had to raise a hand to quell his stammering. "Relax. I'm not here to blackmail you."
He took a few deep breaths, before getting up to his feet. "Phew, thank Oum. But, uh… how much did you hear?"
"All of it." He cringed, which she rolled her eyes at. "Don't get like that. Your secret's safe with me. I'm in no position to judge."
"Uh, what do you mean by that?"
Something in the back of her mind told her that this wasn't the best conversation to have, but she didn't feel like she cared. "Because Ozpin more or less let me in on a hunch. On some sort of social experiment." He was about to ask a question, but she beat him to it. "In case you haven't noticed, I'm not the nicest person around. I'm not exactly all there, either. Hell, especially not today."
"Yeah, what's been up with you today? You've been acting really weirdly."
"Not talking about it."
"Oh, okay." He rubbed at his arm. "So, what're you doing up here?"
"Figured I'd enjoy the night. Was actually further back on the roof, but then you and Pyrrha came up making a bunch of noise. Initially came over to chase you two off."
"Ah, right." He walked over to where she was on the roof. "So, how's things going with – " He stopped suddenly as he stood next to her, and sniffed the air.
"How's things going with what?"
The question seemed to snap him out of his trance. He stared at her like she had a third eye growing out of her head. "Kassidy, is that alcohol?"
The gunslinger took another drink, and then looked at the amber glass bottle. "Maybe." She regarded the guy next to her. "I'm not giving you any, if that's what you want."
"No, it's not that, it's…" Jaune was at a genuine loss for words. "I mean, why?"
She sighed. "Because sleeping pills don't work." She took another drink. "And also because I need to forget."
He scuffed his shoe on the rooftop. "You know booze doesn't help with that, right?"
"You've obviously never tried it before. It works short term. I only need short term to get sleep." She decided to change the subject. "Ever feel like you're in over your head?"
Arc gave her a funny look. "You said you heard everything, right?"
"Yeah."
"Then you already know that I always feel like I'm in over my head."
"Yeah, I guess." Taking another drink, "But still. You can get better. You have an aura, you can do all this ridiculous crap because you have some scientifically impossible soul wizardry making you faster and stronger and tougher than a person has any right to be." Another drink. "As for me, I'm just running around hoping I packed enough ammo and nobody decided to break the laws of physics more than necessary."
"Oh c'mon, give yourself more credit than that." Jaune waved his hand. "I mean, you're so good. Nobody can touch you in ranged weaponry, and you're getting better in hand to hand. All I've got over you is my aura."
"And that's all you need." She took another drink and stabbed a finger in his chest. "You already have everything you need. Once you have the aura, everything else is a piece of cake. Sure, you need to spend some time in the gym, and you need to work on your swordsmanship, but still. That's the easy part." Another drink, and she stabbed her thumb at herself. "Me? I'm about as good as I'm going to get. My rifle has limits, I'm not getting any stronger, and I've already pushed human reaction and endurance to their limits. I've got nowhere else to go." Another drink, a sigh. "Sometimes, I feel like it's so fucking pointless."
The two stood in silence for a while before Jaune dismissed himself and scurried on inside. She took her time finishing her current drink, looking at how pretty Beacon Tower looked against the night sky. She had left Bob in the dorms so she wouldn't have to talk to him. He'd tried calling her Scroll, of course, but she ignored it. Maybe she should've brought him up here to take a picture, though. The tower in the distance, the moon off to the left. It needs to be framed.
"Is that really how you feel?"
Kassidy jumped, and her heart froze when she turned around. Standing behind her was the one person she absolutely did not want to deal with tonight.