Chapter 25: Ninjas of Acquaintance

AN: So, RWBY Vol.4 happened. And holy shit that animation, I'm drooling right now. I'm definitely going to be figuring out how to get a Geist (sp?) into my story at some point. And the bunny hoodie. So, spoiler alert for that. Digging the new costumes, and the fact that Ren said more this episode than the past three seasons put together.

Anyway, I promised something lighter, and a party, so let's kill two birds with one stone with a pizza party! Kassidy finds out that Remnant doesn't actually have the glorious delicacy, and decides to fix the problem herself. With a bit of help from Ren, because I haven't teased enough ships yet. One of these days, she'll be less clueless than Jaune.

Also, after some recommendations from a friend of mine who is a "professional" reader, I've made a couple small changes to how I write to make it easier to tell who's doing what. Don't hesitate to let me know whether or not it's working.

(Perspective: K)

Yang slammed their dorm room door open once again; honestly, it was a miracle that it hasn't been ripped off its hinges yet. But Kassidy didn't feel like complaining. It was the next day, and RWKY and JNPR just got back from lunch.

"And you packed all that extra stuff for nothing, K. Told ya things would go well today!" Yang called out happily as she went to the bathroom to shower.

"Hey, forgive me for being prepared for our training missions. Especially considering our first one ended so well." Her partner wasn't wrong though, Kassidy had spared no expense in stuffing her bag with every last bit of ammo and medical supplies she could get her hands on. Dropping the bag at the foot of her bed, she dug out Bob and set him to charge on her desk. She had really wanted to work some on his code this afternoon…

Before a textbook got dropped in front of her. "Don't think I haven't noticed your grades suffering. Honestly, how can someone who brags so much about their intelligence be failing applied chemistry? Or regular chemistry, for that matter?" Gee, thanks for announcing it to the world, Weiss.

Kassidy sighed and dropped her head into her hands. "Hey, it's not my fault we didn't have dust where I'm from. Or that you guys have all the wrong names for chemistry. Or that you haven't filled out the periodic table yet."

Weiss looked like she was about to launch into yet another tirade, but then she took a deep breath and looked noticeably calmer. "Look, I understand you're putting all your work into improving your skills, and as loathe as I am to admit it, it's showing." After this, her expression hardened again. "But that's still not an excuse to completely ignore you schoolwork. Have you even started your history paper yet?"

"Uhh… that was the one about the setup of Menagerie, right?"

Bob decided to come in to the rescue. "Close. This paper's topic is the impact the persecution of the Faunus had on the ignition and results of the Great War. And no, this is not 'World War One' Great War."

"Ugh, and I thought racism was bad enough back home. You guys definitely took it to a whole new level." Weiss noticeably flinched at Kassidy's comment, but someone knocked on their door before she could ask. Ruby opened the door to find JNPR on the other side, which Kassidy jumped at. "Juniper to the rescue! Thanks for getting me out of another Schnee lecture."

Weiss scowled at her, but Jaune decided to change the topic quickly. "Our pleasure. Anyway, considering we have the afternoon free, we were wondering if you ladies wanted to hang out this evening." Kassidy raised an eyebrow at him; even only two days after his secret came out, it was obvious that Cardin was milking his blackmail for all it was worth. Jaune shrugged while Ruby started talking at a mile a minute about how awesome the idea was.

"Actually Ruby, in case you've forgotten, we still have studying to catch up on." Well, I mean, Weiss isn't wrong.

"Oh, but that's boring! Why don't – " Nora was about to explain why it would be a terrific idea to hang out before she sniffed the air. "Ew, you guys still haven't showered?"

Kassidy shook her head, before giving Weiss a half-hearted glare. "Someone thought it would be a good idea to let Yang shower first."

Weiss gawked, "Did you even smell your partner? She had a stronger odor than the three of us put together!"

"No, I don't go randomly smelling people. Kinda creepy, if you ask me." This made Weiss sputter, but was saved from more embarrassment by Yang finally stepping out of the bathroom, dressed in only a towel (much to Ruby, Weiss, and JNPR's chagrin). "Only half an hour? That has to be a record of some kind."

Yang took the jab in stride. "Yeah, figured you guys needed a shower too. Decided I could fix my hair on your bed."

"Can you help Ice Queen chill out while you're at it? I'm trying to get work done." Kassidy and Yang shared a high-five while Weiss was practically steaming.

"No you're not!"

"Bob needs some of his protocols upgraded. Just because it's not the work you want done, doesn't mean it's not work."

"Anyways…" Pyrrha tried to defuse the situation as well as remind the four girls they had guests. "So what do you guys think? Of spending this evening together as friends?"

"I like how you think, P-money!" Yang fixed her towel while digging out three separate brushes and started the laborious task of caring for her golden carpet. "How about we go out? There's a new burger joint in town I've been meaning to try out."

"Ooh, burgers. Been forever since I've had one of those. Or even…" Kassidy gasped and her eyes went wide at the thought. "Pizza! Oh my god, when was the last time I had a pizza? Please tell me there's a pizza place around here."

Seven blank stares answered her, before Ruby nervously tugged her cape. "Uhh, is pizza something from your home?"

Kassidy returned the blank stare. "Wait, are you seriously saying you guys don't know what pizza is?" Seven shakes of the head were the reply, and she stared off into space with a neutral expression on her face.

Ren was showing some concern after thirty seconds of silence. "Um, is she alright?"

The question was enough to get her back to reality. "Bob, they don't have pizza."

"That's what it sounds like to me."

"Uncultured heathens!" Her teammates flinched from the outburst. "How can you not know of the most glorious food in existence? Bob, is Dad's recipe in your memory anywhere? We need to fix this, and we need to fix this tonight."

While her computer searched, Weiss had regained her composure. "So, what is this pizza? And what could possibly make it so good that you would think it would compete with the finest food Remnant has to offer?" The other teens nodded in agreement that they weren't sure about the whole deal.

"You simply haven't had the joy of eating a pizza. An issue I'm solving tonight."

"You have work to do tonight! You do not have the time to be cooking!"

"Pizza is more important!"

"No food is more important than your grades!"

Nora sheepishly interjected, "Well, I mean, pancakes are pretty important…"

All of a sudden, a lightbulb went off in Kassidy's head as to how to convince her acquaintances as to the importance of pizza. "Oh Nora?"

"Yeah?"

"Think of pizza… as a meat and cheese pancake."

The entire room gasped as the teenagers realized they had exactly five seconds before Nora went ballistic. Ren was the only one able to form a coherent, albeit horrified, reaction. "Kassidy, you did not just say that. Do you have any idea – "

He was interrupted by a flash of pink, as his partner suddenly materialized right in front of him with wide eyes, a manic grin, and a tone in her voice that suggested horrible things if you didn't do what she wanted. "Ren, would you be a dear and help Kassidy make the meat pancakes?"

"Kassidy, you have doomed us all." With a resigned sigh, Ren dug out a notepad and pencil he seemed to carry in some sort of extra-dimensional pocket. Really, it was the only explanation how he always has it on him regardless of the situation. "Okay, what do we need for the pizzas?"

"Big one is gonna be ovens. Willing to bet we can each eat a pizza ourselves, plus salad and drink. I might be able to fit two pizzas in an oven, which still means four ovens." Kassidy thought for a moment. "Do you think we'll be able to talk the kitchen staff into letting us borrow their equipment this evening?"

"I happen to be in good standing with them. They do have a rather large oven that will surely be able to fit eight pancakes."

"Oh no, my dear Ren, pizzas are not pancake sized. A good pizza is at least sixteen inches across. Now, after ovens, the most important component is the dough. You cannot have a good pizza without a good dough. Once Bob finds my old man's recipe,"

"Which I just did."

"Awesome, now we just need to go shopping for ingredients. After that, we're gonna need tomato sauce, mozzarella cheese, and finally the toppings."

"Now there's the good stuff!" Yang called from the bottom bunk. "What kind of toppings are we talking about?"

"Well, what kind of toppings would you want?" Reactions ranged from agape mouths to ravenous eyes. "Pretty much any meat and any vegetable works. As for fruit, the only one I've heard of is pineapple. So yeah, pick some meats and veggies."

As everyone thought of some of the strangest topping combinations she's ever heard, her computer brought her attention to a new message from Professor Ozpin. Her eyes tried bugging out of her head as she finished reading.

"KASSIDY SMITH,

PAYMENT IS USUALLY RENDERED TO HUNTRESSES ON THE COMPLETION OF MISSIONS. CONSIDERING THE SUCCESSFUL COMPLETION OF A SEARCH AND RESCUE MISSION, THE WAGE OF 500 LIEN WAS TRANSFERRED TO YOUR ACCOUNT. THE MILITIA ALSO SAW FIT TO SEND ALONG A 100 LIEN BONUS. I FULLY EXPECT THIS TO BE THE FIRST OF A LONG LIST OF GOOD WORK WITH YOUR NAME ATTACHED.

PROFESSOR OZPIN"

"Did you get all that, K?" Yang had apparently finished things off with her own order. "Uh, you alright partner?"

Finally coming back down to Earth (or Remnant, as it were), a goofy grin spread across the gunslinger's face. "Yeah, I'm good."

"Ooh, something good happened. Let me see!" A flash of red confused Kassidy, until she found she was holding not Bob, but a handful of rose petals. "You went on a mission without us! When did this happen? OhmyOumyouneedtotellusallaboutittonight!" Ruby was hanging upside down from her bunk with the oversized tablet.

As everyone gathered around to see what the matter was, Kassidy threw back on her jacket and half-skirt, grabbed Ren's sleeve, and pulled him out the door with her. "C'mon, let's get some shopping done while we have the chance."

Pulling out his Scroll, he seemed confused. "It's not even two o' clock yet."

"Yeah, but the dough will take a while."

"I see." After some walking through the halls, which also involved telling her AI to send her the shopping list, the two found themselves on a Bullhead headed into the city. This seemed like a great idea, until her weak stomach decided to remind her of its existence. Ren said stoically, "I forgot you had motion sickness also."

"A sack that can somehow hold a couple times its own volume in food, and the instant I get airborne it becomes the weakest organ in my body. I've given up on applying logic to myself some time ago."

"Ah. So, what was this about a mission I heard?"

"Last night after dinner, Ozpin took me to the Emerald Forest. Some kid got herself lost, and I needed to find her and bring her back."

"A search and rescue mission. Is it safe to assume that's where your injured arm came from? Did it go well?"

Kassidy scowled at her bandaged arm. For some reason, it wasn't healing as quickly as it usually does. "Well, the girl got back to her family, and Ozpin recently informed me of a six hundred Lien payment. I'd like to think it went alright."

"I suppose congratulations are in order. The success seems to have done wonders for your mood as well. You weren't screaming a fit last night, nor did you seem to have a hangover this morning."

"I was that obvious, huh?"

Ren chuckled, "You can be stealthy while on the job, but beyond that you're not very good at being subtle."

She shrugged. "Must be a side effect of being a terrible liar." Mercifully, the flight had ended at this point, and the two got off. "Know any good food marts or something we can pick all this stuff up at?"

He looked at the list on her Scroll, smiled, and nodded. "I think I know just the place."

"Alright, who are you and what have you done with Lie Ren?" Kassidy looked at him in a joking manner. "You've shown more emotion in the past fifteen minutes than you have in ever, from what I've seen."

Ren flashed a grin. "It is nice to get away from everyone now and then. And it helps that you happen to be one of the least judgmental people I've ever met. It's quite refreshing, really."

"Well, not like I'm in much of a position to be judging anyone."

The remainder of the time out shopping was spent talking about classes, as well as trading stories on their respective partners. While they were out, Kassidy couldn't help but notice people pointing, smiling, and snickering when they thought she couldn't see. All this managed to do was confuse and stress her, and by the time they got back on the Bullhead she was a nervous wreck.

Ren had taken notice. "What's bothering you?"

"Everyone else. Please tell me I wasn't the only one seeing the looks and gestures directed at us."

"You weren't."

"Being the center of attention always puts me on edge. That's the dead giveaway sign something bad is about to happen."

The ninja chuckled. "I assure you the worst that would happen is people would get the wrong idea about us."

Now Kass was even more confused. "'The wrong idea about us.' What's that supposed to mean?"

"Surely you jest. Of course, it's…" He trailed off when he gazed into Kassidy's visage and saw the genuine bewilderment. "Dear Oum, you actually don't know what I'm talking about. I think you could give Ruby a run for her money in the innocence department."

"Um, what?"

"I don't believe I am the person who should have that particular conversation with you."

"Oookay. Moving on."

The remainder of the afternoon was spent mostly in silence. True to his word, Ren got the kitchen staff to allow them to use the equipment. Several hours later found the two bringing eight mouth-watering, masterfully crafted pizzas back to the dorm.

The scene they found was confusing, to say the least. Weiss' desk was in the center of the room with a large crack in it, with Nora and Yang using it to hold an arm wrestling competition. Pyrrha and Weiss were looking at Bob and holding an animated discussion about something, while Jaune and Ruby were content to enjoy the scene from Kassidy's bed.

Ren cleared his throat. "Alright, fun's over. Let's clear some space, people."

"Indeed, let's." Kassidy jumped, while everyone else bugged out at Glynda standing behind them. How did that lady get behind me without me noticing? Have I really slacked off that much?

"Just for your information, Ren and I haven't been here all afternoon."

"I am fully aware, Miss Smith. I trust you two had fun?" Goodwitch had a twinkle in her eye, before it was instantly extinguished as her gaze fell upon the rest of the room. "However, your friends have been so boisterous that numerous noise complaints have forced me to investigate the matter."

Kassidy groaned, Ren facepalmed, and in stereo, the two called out their respective partners. This earned some giggles from four of the teenagers, with both Yang and Nora gawking about how it wasn't fair to automatically assume that they were the troublemakers.

"Based on the evidence available, I'll need Miss Xiao Long and Miss Valkyrie to report to my office." After a collective groan from the two heavy hitters, her face softened considerably. "Although, I will not need to see either of you until tomorrow morning. Now, I believe I heard something about a party as well?"

"Yeah, a pizza party." Kassidy shuffled her feet. "It came to my attention that the glorious cheese and meat covered discs didn't exist here, so I decided to remedy that situation. I'd offer you one, but I'm afraid I didn't make an extra."

The professor grinned wickedly, confusing all the kids. "For shame, Miss Smith. That simply can't do at all. Considering that partners are partially held responsible for each other's actions, I expect you and Mr. Ren to remedy this situation at your earliest convenience." And with that, she turned on her heeled boot and walked down the hallway, leaving eight stunned teenagers in her wake.

"So… that happened," was all Yang was able to get out.

"Now, without further ado, mostly before these get cold, let us commence with the greatest food experience of your lives. Alright, first off, we had chicken, onion, and avocado?"

"That would be me."

"Wow, getting adventurous Weiss. And that actually doesn't sound that bad a combination, might need to try it sometime. Sausage, feta, and black olive?"

"Hello again!"

"Of course, because you weren't fulfilling enough of a Greek stereotype. Here you go, Pyrrha. Pepperoni, sausage, hamburger, bacon… alright, this one's obviously Yang's."

"You know me well, partner."

"Which leaves me with my sausage and green pepper."

Ren finished things off by handing Ruby a cheese pizza, Jaune a pepperoni and mushroom pizza, and Nora a… the less I think about that topping combination, the better. He had made another sausage and green pepper for himself at the gunslinger's suggestion.

Needless to say, the glorious meat and cheese discs were huge hits with everyone. Even Weiss was pleasantly surprised. After eating dinner and with Jaune pulling out a movie for the eight to watch, all Kassidy could think about was how used she could get to this.